Violence Inherent in the System
by Darth Drafter
Summary: Sequel to The Girl Who Loved. Please read that one first. Harry returns to Hogwarts for his sixth year with his Intended at his side. Did I mention that she's the Crown Princess of the Moon Kingdom? Or that she's dead? HP/Ranma.5/SailorMoon multicross
1. HelpHelp I'm Being Repressed

Insert standard legal disclaimer here. Mr. Hollywood, Mr. Writer's Lawyer, I'd rather not lose everything and be kicked to the curb. I don't own these characters nor will I get one red cent from their use.

Currently, Harry Potter, Ranma ½, and Sailor Moon are being literarily violated. Monty Python gets referenced on occasion. Avatar, Naruto, Devil Hunter Yohko and others are sometimes referenced but have no speaking characters.

_Italic text_ will be used for _flashbacks_, to emphasize _individual _words or to show whole sentences are in another _language_ than is standard for whatever scene is being read. _~Italics between tilde marks is mind to mind speaking.~_

If this story gets the same audience as the Girl Who Loved, a logical conclusion I think, then I will most likely address reviews individually at the end of every chapter... unless I don't want to.

**Plot Continuation Warning: If you have not yet read The Girl Who Loved, please do so now. This story won't make any sense to you at all until you've read that one. It's more like the break between Kill Bill 1 and 2 than the gap between Star Wars Ep. IV and V. At least, it is in the author's opinion.**

For those of you who reviewed the final full chapter and Epilogue of The Girl Who Loved, I thank you all and hope that you review again so that I can address each and every comment one at a time just like before. A few reviews were of the 'it's over? WTF??!!' variety. From this I've learned that you can never state your intent to continue in a sequel often enough or in enough places for everyone to see it. I think I now know what OSHA and NTSA safety regulators feel like when they put those damn warnings everywhere.

Looking back, I think I may agree with those reviewers that said some early characters are a little rough. I'll definitely be doing something about that. I honestly didn't agree with them at the time, but that just shows you how much you can learn about writing in a few months when you've never done it before.

...as seen previously on The Girl Who Loved right before the Epilogue...

"_The Hogwarts Express is a place for children to come and dream of a brighter future. There is no room for your corrupted spirit and your message of darkness and hate. You have insulted me. You have insulted my friends. You are a threat to the future of those I love. In the name of Love and Justice, I will punish you!"_

_Maybe Harry learned a little too much from Usagi's 'How to be Sailor Moon' lessons. Really._

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter One: Help Help I'm Being Repressed**

September 1st, 1996

Harry Potter has successfully confused the shit out of everyone.

The crowd outside was easy to confuse as Jusenkyo Curses were unknown to the magical populace of the British Isles. Add a bit of showing off with Harry 'Chosen One' Potter morphing into the Crown Princess of the Moon, also known as the Goddess of Diagon Alley, and you get an area effect Confundus that Fleur Delacour would be hard-pressed to beat.

Crabbe and Goyle were almost as easy. More known for being thuggish than thoughtful, their brains seized up when a mythic figure turned out to, in fact, be real. Stuck between dutifully supporting Draco and begging forgiveness from the Wizarding World's version of Cinderella, the two couldn't do anything.

Malfoy was the real target. Harry was channeling Usagi heavily and refused to let Malfoy upstage her. Her distinctive Mahou Shoujo battle speech caused heads to poke out of cabin doors and made a group of Fourth and Fifth Year girls gape in wonder.

Harry slowly removed her sunglasses just as Usagi planned. This over the top move to reveal her magical-girl red eyes couldn't have worked any better in Hollywood.

Brilliant.

They wouldn't notice Usagi's part in the dirtiest prank Harry had ever dreamed up.

Usagi drew herself behind the others and down through the floor of the passenger car. The ghost girl then found the bottom of Vincent Crabbe's feet and plunged herself up and into his body. Vincent stumbled a little at the cold shock of a spirit running up his body from toe to head. Usagi was almost disappointed at how easy it was to seize control of Vincent Crabbe. 'He' held a hand over the sigil on his forehead, suffering a mock headache. 'Vincent' then gave Harry a nod and a wink.

This was going to be bloody brilliant.

"But first, your friend has something he'd like to share with you." Harry winked back to 'Vincent'. Draco felt a tap on his shoulder which confirmed that Crabbe did indeed have something to share with him. Draco turned to Crabbe with that 'this better be worth it' look on his face.

Instead of shyly begging forgiveness for his abject stupidity, Crabbe took one hesitant step, putting him inside Draco's guard. Before Draco could pull back, the possessed boy grabbed him passionately and delivered a fierce open mouthed kiss. Draco tried to yell for his lackey to sod off only to get a tongue down the throat for his troubles.

Finally pushing through the shock of getting orally raped, Draco pushed free of Crabbe. As the larger boy fell back against a passenger compartment door, Usagi broke free of Vincent and made her escape. Seconds later, she reappeared behind Hermione.

"_Usagi, Love. If my Dad's watching now, you just got his blessing."_ None of the shocked students even noticed Usagi had gone anywhere, not even Hermione, Ginny or Ron.

"_Flawless Victory! Level One Boss defeated! Extra Life __earned!" _ Usagi golf-clapped for her own performance. God, she missed the arcade. Being dead really sucked.

"Why don't we hold off on your punishment until after you and your boyfriend sit down and talk about your feelings for each other." Harry fought desperately to maintain a calm face as she sauntered past Malfoy, Goyle and the Ravenclaw girls who had front row seats for Usagi's performance.

Harry turned to Gregory Goyle as she walked past. "I don't know what you see in him. I hope for your sake that he's at least good in bed." Malfoy was far too enraged with Crabbe to notice the verbal knife being twisted in his back. Goyle went white as he noticed the rumor spreading up and down the train. He was now officially scared shitless of the Moon Princess; he felt like a rodent before a hawk in her presence. Gregory quietly swore to himself that he would never go against the Moon Princess no matter what Draco wanted.

"_That was disgusting, Harry." _Usagi shivered for a moment as she floated behind her betrothed. _"You're g__oing to have to do something really special to make up for that."_

"_Well… let me think on it a bit." _ Harry led his group to the last passenger car. Really, it was tradition now to get a cabin near the rear of the train.

By the time Harry and company reached their destination, the faux Moon Princess had managed to throw dozens of students off guard by calling out their names in passing. She saw Colin Creevy and demanded he take her picture with Hermione, Ron and Ginny. In exchange for ten prints of that picture, she posed with Colin for a couple of shots. Harry still didn't know what prank the twins had given her, but it couldn't possibly be any better than this, could it?

"_I think I've got it."_ Harry was in the middle of the last car. Just about any of these cabins would be fine. _"I __haven't let you possess me yet while we were alone, have I?"_

Usagi's eyes glittered with excitement. _"No! What did you have in mind!?"_

"_I say he should let you diddle yourself and then turn bloke so you can see what wanking is like __too." _ Two horribly embarrassed teens, one of them dead, looked to over to Luna as she stepped out of a cabin. "You'll never guess the dream I had last week! Oh, it was grand!"

Hermione didn't know what had gotten Harry and Usagi to stop dead in their tracks, but she hoped to figure it out soon enough. "I'd love to hear your dream, Luna. Perhaps in the cabin, though?"

The blonde Ravenclaw was beaming as she stepped aside to allow Her Friends entrance to her cabin.

Hermione and Ginny sat to either side of Harry on one bench as Ron took the last spot on the opposite side with Luna and Neville. Neville and Luna had been chatting together about exotic flora long before Luna heard the others approach.

"Everybody settled? Right. Luna, please tell us all about your dream." Harry wanted to hear what passed for a 'grand' dream for Luna. Would there be snorkacks?

"Um... er... your Highness?" Neville. Oh, he didn't know yet, did he? Best to put the poor boy out of his misery now than string it out.

"Hey, Nev. They didn't happen to show you a letter from Harry yet, did they?" The boy blushed at being addressed so closely by Royalty.

"No, your Highness. They didn't." Their passenger car shook once, then it shook again a second later and then a third time. The view outside of their compartment window began to slide from left to right. The Hogwarts Express was beginning its annual journey to Hogwarts Castle.

"Come off it Nev. The Crown Princess is over there." Harry pointed at Usagi who then smiled and waved at Neville. "I'm Harry. It's a long story, but the short of it is that I've got a curse that turns me into a girl sometimes. I can change back though, so no pervy thoughts about me, yeah?"

Neville had to battle blushing and going pale at the same time over the implications. He settled for leaning his head against the wall and silently counting to ten.

"Okay!" Luna saw the others settle down. "As I was saying, I had this wonderful dream last week that I absolutely had to share. You see... it started with me and my boyfriend in his family manor's library. I'll grant you that I'm currently not dating anyone, but in this dream, my boyfriend was a very brave and handsome young man with gorgeous green eyes." Uh, oh....

"So there we were, my boyfriend and I, when the spirit of the girl he would marry in the future takes possession of my tight, sexy, hot body and the two of them proceed to use me for their carnal pleasures!" Harry, Hermione and Usagi were really trying hard to look normal.

Ginny really liked this dream. Why couldn't she have dreams full of green eyed boyfriends and carnal pleasure?

"It was only after hours of my being sexually devoured did the spirit have her fill of him and leave me to act out my own desires." Harry's wide eyes locked on to a panicky Hermione. He didn't remember the girls trading places half way through the... uh... thing they did. Well, he kind of did remember Hermione not having Usagi's sigil later on in the evening in question, but he was far too focused on their activities to worry about little details like that.

Is Harry Potter an amusement park ride now? And if so, how in Merlin's name did Luna get a ticket?

Hermione went into full retreat. "Ron? We have a prefects meeting to get to! Thanks for that wonderful little fantasy which could never have actually happened a few nights ago or anything but I'm sorry but we really should be going _come __**on**_ Ron!"

Everyone's favorite Know-It-All fled the compartment dragging a confused Ron in her wake. So focused was she on making good her escape that she didn't even remember to hen-peck other students for rule violations until she and Ron were halfway down the train.

With Hermione out of the cabin, Harry shook her head and tried hard to forget that her shag tally was up to five and a half. Well, it is if you count ghosts as a half point, anyway.

"_Let's find out what carnage the twins are about to unleash from __afar, shall we?" _ Harry asked Usagi while pulling out Fred and George's package. Ginny's eyes lit up when she recognized the box.

Harry started by checking the box lid for magical prank triggers.

Clean.

She opened the box.

Harry's girlish shriek was quickly drowned out by laughing. The Great Harry Potter, the Chosen One, the Goddess of Diagon Alley was laid low by common muggle spring snakes.

"That better not be the end of it......." Harry really wanted to hurt someone, but went back to opening the box instead.

* * *

"Excuse me, young ladies." Ginny and Harry froze. Damn, they're only halfway down the train and the prank isn't done yet. "If I remember correctly from before retirement, and it hasn't been quite _that_ long ago, the two of you seem to be in the middle of a prank."

Ginny told Harry that Usagi should have come to act as lookout between passenger cars. Unfortunately, the ghost had elected to stay behind and talk to Luna.

Now that Harry was caught without an exit strategy, the only thing they could do was to figure out who this new guy was and hope for the best. Logic dictated that Harry was about to meet the new Defense Professor.

Harry turned around and smiled. "I surrender, Sir. You caught us in the act. Pity, I don't even know what these things do yet."

The man was someone she really didn't remember seeing before. Harry would have said he was short if it weren't for all of her time spent with Professor Flitwick. This man was clearly old, but less of a fossil than the Headmaster. Giving his outfit a quick glance, Harry was surprised to see a fairly rich looking outfit with what looked to be gold buttons.

The man's eyes were twinkling as they moved from Harry's eyes to her hair and back. Shite.

"Your Highness! I had no idea that you would be attending Hogwarts! Please allow me to extend the warmest of welcomes to you." Harry should have planned out what she would tell people in this situation but she really didn't think she'd have to defend herself until stepping off the train.

"Oh! But where are my manners? I am Professor Horace Slughorn, Potions Master Extraordinaire." The man bowed low before Harry and Ginny and then came back up to kiss Harry's hand. Not wanting to play the fair damsel part too far, Harry pulled her hand back.

"I hope you will forgive me, Professor, but Weasely products are notorious for being activated by absorption. You may not want to kiss that hand just yet." He looked at the hand in question for a moment before gracefully backing away.

"Quite. Interesting business the Weasely brothers have; their Charms and Potions scores must have been top notch to do half of what they do... " Professor Slughorn looked over Harry's shoulder to see the redhead behind her. "And you must be Miss Ginevra. I read all about your and Mister Potter's adventures in the Department of Mysteries, young lady. I'll have my eye on you, yes I will."

He seemed to be extraordinarily pleased with himself for some unknown reason and not in an 'I've got you now, troublemaker' way either. Wait. Potions Master? Why would the Headmaster hire another Potions Master unless... oh, shite.

"My dears, I'd love to invite you to a little get together I'm having with some of the up and coming stars of Hogwarts. We'll be having a spot of supper in my rooms with McLaggen and Zambini, and don't forget Melinda Bobbin. She's a charming witch who's family owns a large chain of apothecaries." After visually bounding between the two witches, Horace's eyes settle on Harry. "And Please invite Mr. Potter. I can't seem to find the boy... honestly, I'm surprised not to see him in your presence."

Well, he's here, isn't he? "I'm getting a bit of quality Girl Time with Ginny right now. My Intended is off performing feats of mischief, no doubt."

"Yeah. He's quite the bad influence. Isn't he, _your ladyship?_" Ginny had to get a dig in.

"I'll have none of that from you. You're my partner in crime today, not a Lady-in-waiting."

"Do I need to be punished? You could get Harry to spank me." Ginny didn't get many chances to flirt with Harry away from the other witches and she wasn't going to back off just because a Professor was listening.

"Ginny, Ginny, Ginny... saying such things in front of such a respectable gentleman. Honestly. Your spanking will be performed by Neptune and Uranus." Ginny's eyes widened. She remembered those two. They liked girls.

"Well, I suppose I should allow you two ladies return to your youthful diversions. I'll continue looking for our dear Mister Potter and I've a few other invitations to hand out as well." Horace sketched out a small bow to the witches in front of him. "Miss Weasely. Your Highness. It was a true pleasure to meet the both of you."

"I look forward to meeting you again. If you are the new Potions Professor, then I daresay a great many student's will be looking forward to meeting you." Harry figured she could give a compliment and fish for information at the same time.

"How nice of you to say so! I am indeed the new Potions Professor, though I've had the post before. It'll be just like old times. Good day, ladies." And with that, the jovial round man with a walrus-like moustache continued down the hall. Harry thought that the man would do a good job of portraying Father Christmas in a non-magical shopping mall.

Harry and Ginny got back to the task of picking targets and placing new Weasely prank marbles outside of the appropriate cabins. The little buggers were designed to be hard to see and to start working when the cabin doors opened.

"You know what this means, Ginny?" Harry wanted to see how much attention she'd been paying.

"I hope it means that Snape isn't teaching this year."

"Not likely. My last spell in the alley healed people without hurting anyone, even the Death Eaters." Harry wanted Ginny to be right, but she knew better. Sod it all.

"He's teaching Defense this year then. Why can't they hire someone like an auror or something. Tonks or someone. Hell, they should hire you, Harry." Harry choked.

"No, really. Look at what you did with the D.A. I did much better in my end of year testing than I would have otherwise, and not just in Defense either. My Charms scores went up too. Flitwick gave me house points for my improvement; did you know that?"

Harry didn't know that. She tried to push down the blush as she set five more marbles down near a door into a Slytherin held compartment.

"You're loads better than Lockheart or Umbridge were. Only Professor Lupin did anywhere near as good and he had official classes whereas you had to be sneaky about it." Ginny turned back to the task at hand. They only had ten minutes or so to finish up before the prefects would be back out and patrolling. Besides, nagging was more Hermione's thing.

When the prefects meeting finally did end, Harry and Ginny were both waiting for Hermione and Ron with innocent smiles and glowing halos. Ginny's halo may have had some Spell-o tape holding it together near the back. Needless to say, Ron gave them a wink and Hermione tried to get the prank out of them for the next thirty minutes.

Sorry, Hermione. You'll just have to wait and see like everyone else.

* * *

With one last burst of steam and noise, the Hogwarts Express ended its journey. Seconds later, feet began to hit the pavers to one side of the train as the student population disembarked.

Harry Potter was the first student to leave the first car, followed closely by a blonde Moon Princess and Padma Patil from the third car. Then Harry got off of the second and fourth cars with several Second and Third Year students while Princess Serenity got off of the first, second and fifth cars amidst several other upper year students.

As more and more students left the train, a pattern began to emerge. Out of every four or so students, one of them was Harry Potter and one was Princess Serenity.

"Lav-Lav, you just don't understand! You got the better end of this prank, I'm telling you." The Chosen-One-of-Ninety-Four glared at Princess Serenity Thirty-Eight.

"Pav-Pav, don't even… I saw you playing with your bits several times in the past hour – and what were you doing in the boy's loo for half an hour anyway. We all know that boys finish up a lot faster than we do." Crown Princess Brown fired back.

"I… eh… didn't really know which loo to go to, you know. And then... and then there was a line. Lots of people wanted to check out the Princess's and Harry's- er… needed to relieve themselves. Honest."

The twins were carefull in their charms-work. They didn't want anyone abusing… okay, over-abusing the honor of being Harry and his girl. Not one bloke got Princess'ed. That would have been asking for dark pervy trouble.

"Ron." Harry called out.

"Yeah, mate?"

"I think we broke Hagrid."

The man in question had been waiting dutifully for the train to arrive as usual, but he didn't appear to be saying anything. From Harry's group, it was clear that the mountain of a man was watching all of the Harry Potters and Moon Princesses pass by. So mesmerized by the Mass Potter Migration of 1996 was he that a few of what could only be Ickle Firsties were passing him by in favor of following the upper years over to carriages.

We can't have that, now. Can we?

"I'll just give him a kick or something then." Ron looked over to Hermione and Harry who both nodded back.

Ron jogged over to Hagrid's dazed form.

"Oi." No answer.

THWACK

"Oi! Hagrid!"

The life seemed to return to Hagrid's eyes and he looked down to see who was talking to him.

"Blimey, if it idn't Ron. How are ye, Ron?" Looks like he'll need one more push to get the Firsties like he's supposed to. Harry lightly elbowed Hermione and nodded in Hagrid's direction.

"Hagrid! It looks like the First Years are trying to get on the carriages! You should round them up, don't you think?"

Hagrid's eyes widened as he looked down the trail and saw how many of his flock were going astray.

"First Years! First Years come to me!" That wasn't scary at all... unless you were a little First Year student hoping that you won[t get lost and then a mountain of a man bellows out for you to go right to him. Luckily, several prefects among the crowd noticed the younger students moving in the wrong direction and began to help Hagrid round them up.

Obviously this group of responsible leaders included one highly intelligent, if a little bossy, Gryffindor prefect who drafted all of her good friends into crowd control service.

Among the chaos and confusion, no one noticed two students disappear into thin air.

* * *

Walking up to the Great Hall gave no joy to Severus Snape tonight, not that it ever did before.

He had begun to think that things were turning around after the battle and his extended recovery but old burdens soon returned to weigh down his soul. Snape still answered to two masters: Dumbledore and the Dark Lord. His arm no longer bore the Dark Mark, but such a minor detail wouldn't stand in the Dark Lord's way forever. Dumbledore was a changed man, but he still held great power and Snape had no way to brake free of his control either.

While the changes in Dumbledore appeared to be positive so far, any change at all was hard to deal with. Better the devil you know and all that.

Worse yet, the Potions Master may have just incurred another debt. Severus shuddered at the thought. Would he never be free? Now it seemed as though he may owe something to Princess Serenity, the very girl he had gloated over with intent to rape until she tore him to little bits in Hogsmeade. That was not one of the Headmaster's better ideas. The 'ambush and subdue' bit was the Headmaster's idea, mind you, not the 'bum rape' bit.

If only the fact that he had a debt to the Potter line was the end of it. That debt has been chafing for years with Dumbledore using it from the very night Lily died. Bad as owing a debt to Potter was, the real suffering had been Dumbledore's constant little reminders over the years. Not that it was anything overt, just little things.

'Look, Severus, one of the new witches has green eyes' one year and 'my, that little muggleborn has a gift for potions, just like Lily did' the next. Looking back, Severus had to wonder if the Headmaster knew what those comments would do to his disposition. He must have known.

Perhaps if Severus had been able to get a position brewing or doing research outside of the school, he may have been able to forget the hate long enough to move on with his life.

That didn't happen, did it? No. Ever since the Dark Lord's first fall from power, Severus Snape has spent nearly all of his life inside of Hogwarts Castle. Even summer months would find him brewing this or that for school use. There was, of course, the occasional special order to be dealt with as well. Much as he tried to keep his family home at Spinner's End cared for, the Potions Master would spend at best one month a year in his own bedroom.

With his history, those nights were spent alone. Each and every one of them.

In years gone by, the night of the Opening Feast was the traditional night for him to pick his new girl. Tonight though, Severus Snape wasn't in the mood. In fact, since waking up a few days ago, Severus had come to regret his professional demeanor. Specifically, he regrets his complete lack of a professional demeanor. So many potential Potions Masters came to him for guidance and got nothing. Nine different girls had gone to him for lessons only to become his potioned love toy for a year with nothing but Obliviate to show for it. If the Headmaster hadn't already singled out Miss Granger this summer, it may have been her turn this year.

Not tonight.

Severus Snape may never be a light wizard. He may never be liked or respected by most students. He may never earn the love of another, but there is one thing he _will_ do this year.

This year he will teach properly. Severus Snape mentally swore to himself that he was going to teach the clueless children of Magical England how to properly defend themselves and they in turn would learn. The little dunderheads would learn defense whether they wanted to or not.

One flight of stairs and one hallway away from the Great Hall, a pair of coins in his pocket began to heat up.

Damn it all to Hell! Did he not disable the ambush portkeys hidden near the end of Hogsmeade Station's platform? He needed to inform Dumbledore that the accursed things actually worked.

* * *

Hanna Abbot tried to open her eyes. Why were her eyelids so heavy?

She made another attempt which did no better than the first. Considering the fact that her sense of balance had completely left her her as well... as well as her sense of time, it was little wonder she didn't even notice the house elves levitating her onto a solid looking table with cold-forged iron manacles attached to all four corners.

* * *

Draco Malfoy was signing his life away.

In front of the young Malfoy Scion, on the Headmaster's desk, sat a foot deep stack of parchments that the boy was methodically signing again and again and again. Thirty-seven behavioral charms tend to have that kind of effect on someone.

Well, he wasn't really signing his life away. The parchments were written mostly with Harry Potter in mind and very few of them would be legally binding on anyone else. They were also written for an orphan. However much some people would like Draco to suffer that kind of loss, the fact remains that Narcissa still lived.

It would be an absolute scandal if even one of these documents left the room with 'Draco Malfoy' inked at the proper places.

* * *

"Headmaster. The potions are ready as requested." Snape didn't want to alert any of his fellow professors that a scheme has reached fruition, so he used the pre-arranged code phrase. Hopefully his tone would alert Albus that this was no longer the desired course of action and that they should do something about it.

"The- oh... oh yes." Albus almost forgot what Severus was talking about, but he recovered quickly. The portkeys and behavioral adjustment traps... how could he have forgotten? They would have to do something about it.

"Severus, please go and see to the safety of the students. We don't want any of them showing up late do we?" Snape nodded and turned back to retrieve a captive that he really had no desire to keep anymore. As he did so, Albus rose from his seat.

"Minerva. Filius. I find myself with an urgent task to see to before the Opening Feast. Please take care of things if I do not get back from my office in time." The two Heads of House both nodded, though they were a bit suspicious of the request.

The Headmaster left the Great Hall and began the walk to his office.

* * *

"... and so this time... snicker ..this time, when Harry's pop's back into being on the next mountain over, he finds himself right over a very deep and very cold mountain stream. Splash!" Usagi let loose a peal of laughter from her position in Harry's copy of her mortal shell. Everyone was getting a good laugh as Usagi went through all of the more embarrassing things that had happened to her and Harry while taking their casual stroll through China and northern Tibet.

"But why didn't he use his broom or something?" Neville was warming up to the Moon Royal. Not only was she close to Harry, she was also very funny. He had completely forgot that this girl was several tiers above him and everyone else on the social ladder.

That possession trick was rather creepy, though.

"He didn't have it yet. It took a while for him to ask Dobby to go get his things." Now that she thought about it, Usagi wasn't sure how Pluto could have convinced Harry to go to Japan if he actually had a way around those super-big mountains. "It was fun for a while... and the mountains were soooo beautiful. And I've never seen so many stars in the night sky! The Milky Way is gorgeous when you can actually see it!"

"I think that for our Honeymoon, I'll ask Harry to go back to China for a little while." Usagi considered the lonely mountain ranges west of Jusenkyo as belonging to just her and Harry. She didn't hear anything said for the next few minutes inside their Thestral drawn carriage as she fell into a daydream about making love under a clear night sky.

_~Usagi. Why don't you drive all the way into the Great Hall. Walking in there for the first time really is brilliant.~ _Harry was being really sweet to let Usagi play at being alive this evening. She really missed the feel of cloth on skin and resolved never to take her own living body for granted again.

_~Can I? Awesome! I promise to be really really really nice to you later if you let me eat something too.~_ Considering what they've been up to when no one's watching...

_~Be my guest, Love. I can still look through our eyes and watch for reasons to take over if necessary. Just remember to look at the Staff Table every so often.~ _Harry was tempted to point out that there would still not be any pizza for live Usagi, but kept his mind silent.

* * *

At first, Deputy Headmistress Minerva McGonagall was going to simply ask why Her Highness had entered the Great Hall with Mister Potter in her Heather Snape guise, wearing Hufflepuff colors at that. Minerva stopped before she could embarrass herself when the Princess's twin from Ravenclaw followed a Slytherin Harry into the hall. Over the course of the next fifteen or twenty minutes, the returning student body all entered the hall and brought with it nearly a hundred of each teen: Potter and the Princess.

Near the student high tide, a lone pink haired version of the princess entered in the company of Miss Granger. This one also had the glowing head tattoo that Minerva decided to take for a sign of authenticity.

"Oh, just kill me now and be done with it." Minerva looked over to see the Potions Master looking distinctly ill and pulling a Hufflepuff Princess into the hall behind him.

The girl looked a little confunded but otherwise healthy. Still, Severus had brought her in separately and she did look to be under a spell of some sort. As he looked her way, she narrowed her eyes and glared at him.

"Look... it isn't... but I.. " The man took a moment to calm down and tried again. "I swear on my magic that I did nothing harmful or criminal to this girl since I found her where she aught not be. So mote it be." Luckily, Obliviate was neither harmful nor criminal in the strictest sense of the words. Technicalities were such useful things.

Thank Merlin he didn't feel like continuing on with the original plan. To Severus Snape Lite (with eighty percent less Bastard than the Original Formula Severus Snape) the girl's position shackled to a heavy table was arousing but not enough to let him suffer a relapse. He thought that he was sparing the honor and freedom of a girl to whom he owed a debt. He didn't even know who she was now.

As he released the witch, she began to drift over to the Hufflepuff table.

The girl Severus would now identify as the real Moon Princess by way of Hair and sigil was gaping up at the floating candles and enchanted ceiling. He didn't blame her, the ceiling never ceased to amaze him, not that he would ever admit to such a thing.

The real Moon Princess spotted him.

After a moment of locked gazes, the two turned away simultaneously and found their seats.

"Filius. I need to see to the First Years. Please be prepared to open the Feast if Headmaster Dumbledore does not arrive in time." With the diminutive Professor's nod, Minerva rose and moved to the First Year's ceremonial entrance.

Shortly after Minerva left, Heamaster Dumbledore could be seen re-entering the Great Hall with a subdued Mr. Potter in tow.

As soon as Albus cleared the threshold, his jaw dropped. Was it any wonder that Harry was wearing Slytherin green when Albus found him in his office? Which one was the real Harry? Was he even here tonight?

As he released the green tied Harry, Albus scanned the Gryffindor table.

There... sitting between Miss Granger and Mr. Weasely. That was the one.

Albus saw her hair and sigil just as his Deputy Headmistress and Potions Master had before him.

Mister Potter may still be unaccounted for, but at least she showed up on time. Wait. Without Harry, why would she be here at all?

It was when Usagi Pretending-to-be-Harry-Pretending-to-be-Usagi and Ablus 'Old Coot' Dumbledore were exchanging glances that three Harry's between them reverted to their natural forms. Seconds later, a few dozen more Harrys and Princesses disappeared only to be replaced with regular witches and wizards.

By the time Minerva opened the doors to the Great Hall to allow First Years entrance, only a dozen or so transfigured students remained.

This year's sorting may have been a little more tense without the Chosen One in visible attendance, but the procedure of the sorting itself was little different from last year. Professor McGonagall placed the Sorting Hat on the traditional rickety old stool and left it to do what it always does.

_~A talking hat? I've seen talking cats before, but never a hat. Are my shoes going to complain if I wear them too long?~ _Usagi had heard about talking mirrors already. Talking mirrors are fashion advisers that she can do without... How could the mirror know what's new in CanCam or Seventeen?

_~It's starting to sing now, Love. After the song, the First Years will be sorted and we'll have our feast. Remember to sweep the ring over your plate before eating. If the jewel turns red, I'll take over immediately. Otherwise, you can have your first meal in months.~_

_~I so owe you for this, Harry.~_

The Sorting Hat belted out a song almost identical to last year with the whole unite or perish theme near the end. Does the hat not like its job or something?

Dumbledore was true to form when calling out nonsensical words to open the feast. While seeing all of the food appear at once was always a nice trick, that didn't stop Usagi from checking her plate with the potion detector ring.

Clean.

How devious.

Harry settled in for some deep paranoia while Usagi ate and talked and otherwise celebrated her good fortune to know a boy who could turn into a girl who would willingly let a ghost possess him/her.

Let it never be said that their relationship was normal.

Usagi was stuffing her face. Hermione was scandalized that a Crown Princess would have such atrocious table manners, but Ron, on the other hand, nodded to his equal. While food was disappearing in record time before the upper year Gryffindors, Harry was on a hair trigger. Any sudden movements would cause him to regain control of his/her body and draw two of her three magical focii.

Finally, after a feast the likes of which Usagi had never experienced before, she felt the mental tug that Harry used to switch places. After a moment's rearranging, she looked out of Harry's eyes to see that Headmaster Dumbledore had stood to make the year's announcements.

_~What's going on? Are they going to try to get me after curfew?~_ Harry was more paranoid with every second that more nothing happened.

_~Harry, could it be that they really aren't going to try to get you? What you did in Diagon Alley must have affected them; they were right in the middle of it with you.~_

"... and this year's Defence against the Dark Arts Professor will be Severus Snape." As a quarter of the assembled students chose to applaud this announcement, the other three quarters took to hissing and grumbling.

_~Snape as Defence Professor? Surely he's going to hex all of us 'foolish Gryffindors' in the back and then take points for our not suffering enough! Maybe they had some sort of dark shield or... or... maybe they're both just completely mental and the healing magic didn't find any darkness to fix.~ _ Harry heart's rate was climbing fast.

"I think that Professor Snape is going to use this opportunity to hurt Gryffindors and be otherwise very unfair. How many of you agree?" She asked this of the general group around her.

"Agree!" Ginny, Dean and three other Gryffindors in hearing range all belted out together.

"Rotten bastard, Snape is!" Ron.

"He's never been fair to us, thank Merlin Harry still wants to run the D.A." Neville.

"He is... less than professional in his classroom demeanor." 'Mione, God bless her.

_~I win!~ _ Harry would have felt bad at rubbing her victory in Usagi's face if not for the overwhelming paranoia flowing trough her being.

Silence returned to the hall as Headmaster Dumbledore raised both of his hands.

"Finally, we have a celebrity guest with us tonight." Albus looked over at Harry. Several hundred students and most of the faculty followed his lead. "My apologies Your Highness, but I was unaware you would be attending Hogwarts this year. I assure you suitable quarters will be made available. If you would be so kind as to meet with me after the Feast, we can see to all of the necessary arrangements."

As the full population of Hogwarts looked on, the Moon Princess dropped her head for a moment before rising from the table completely. By the time she was free of the table, everyone that had noticed the crescent moon symbol before was confused by it's absence.

Harry placed an elegant hand on Hermione's shoulder and then the other on Ron's.

"I've got an idea. Wish me luck." Harry squeezed each shoulder before putting on as positive a smile as she could muster. Harry then called out for all to hear, "Permission to approach the Head Table?"

The headmaster was surprised a bit at her request, but nodded his head in acceptance just the same. He did not want to appear hostile to the girl most likely to know where Mister Potter is tonight.

Hermione and Ron looked at each other as Usagi, or was it Harry, walked up to the Head Table.

"'I've got an idea' he says. 'Wish me luck' he says." Ron watched the pink hair bounce and sway behind his best mate and shook his head.

"You don't think he'll succeed?" Hermione wanted it to work. She also wanted an hour or two to review the idea and carefully evaluate it's strengths and weaknesses.

"What? Of course he'll win up there." Ron looked back at Hermione. "I just think Harry's better off just making it up on the spot. He should have gone up there without any plan at all."

_~You do have a plan, don't you? Harry?~ _ If she did, it wasn't one that she'd shared so far.

_~One word, Love. Blackmail.~_ To be honest, she'd just thought it up halfway down the Gryffindor table. Her Gryffindor courage was being overtaken by Slytherin cunning with every step. Or was it the Marauder in her showing through?

Harry finished her march to the center of the Head Table and turned to address Headmaster Dumbledore .

"I did not come here tonight to take any classes though it's possible that I may be seen in the halls from time to time. Please do not open a suite of rooms on my behalf." The Headmaster nodded his acceptance. Good.

"I must say that Harry was far less eager to return to school this year than ever before due to your actions this summer. I told him that you should get one last chance to do the right thing before he leaves England to reside permanently in Japan." Albus maintained his warm persona, though his mind was racing for rebuttals which don't involve 'the greater good'. Whether Harry be independent or spineless, he absolutely needed to be in England.

To either side of Albus, other members of the staff were shocked that Harry Potter was even considering living outside of England permanently. Had Harry's relationship with the Headmaster become so bad as to cause the boy to put Eurasia between them?

Last year, Snape would have already launched into an anti-Potter diatribe of epic proportions. His strange silence only served to make Harry even more nervous.

"Your Highness. I find that I must beg for your forgiveness. If Harry were here, I would swear to him that he will be safe and protected here at Hogwarts." Albus didn't think that statement would be enough, but he had to start somewhere.

"It's not safety and protection he wishes you to swear to, Headmaster. If you make a magical vow just like the one you made in Japan, one that extends to after Voldemort's destruction, then Harry will appear as if he'd been here the whole time." Harry placed her hands inside her cloak, hidden from view.

The Headmaster appeared to be considering her request, but the pause drew on longer than Harry wanted. She mustn't allow the Headmaster to believe that she's trapped here.

"If you refuse to make such a promise, Headmaster, then Harry will not enter this hall and I will call for my escort home." Harry's hand drew tight around her original wand. Though she had placed Pluto's teleport target stone in the same pocket before leaving Kings Cross Station, she wasn't sure it would work on Hogwarts grounds. Still, a questionable back-up plan was better than no back-up plan.

Before their last meeting in Diagon Alley, Albus Dumbledore would have refused her request and then accused her of kidnapping Harry.

If he tried that now, it would not end well for anyone.

Today, Albus was feeling like a different person. Learning just what he had been dosing himself with on a daily basis for the past eighty to one hundred years had shaken the Headmaster more than meeting Tom Riddle in the Ministry Atrium. That should come as no surprise, really, as Albus was pretty high during the Atrium fight.

Albus pulled back his magical senses and considered his dilemma one last time. She had a magical core _and_ the power of a planetary avatar. She carried two of the Deathly Hallows on her person. She knew where Harry Potter was. Albus almost laughed at the realization that her knowledge of Mister Potter's whereabouts was the most important fact in that list.

"Very well, Your Highness. I shall take your vow." And he did.

_~I still can't believe that worked.~_

_~It may sound odd coming from a Senshi, but violence isn't always the answer, Harry.~_

_~Tell Voldemort that.~_

_~Maybe I will.~_

Dumbledore cleared his throat. Oh! Right...

Harry smiled and took one step back from the Staff Table. She removed the golden kanzashi with a flourish and got an appreciative gasp. Don't English witches have enchanted hair-clips or something? Maybe not...

Dumbledore almost flinched when Harry pulled two wands, but she never appeared hostile. While pointing the holly and phoenix feather wand at her eyes and the Elder Wand an her hair, she canceled both color charms simultaneously.

"Is that tea still hot, Headmaster?" Albus looked to the simple tea set between himself and Minerva for a moment before nodding. How could Harry let her get BOTH of his wands?

Palming two wands in one hand, the blonde haired blue eyed Moon Princess reached over to dip two slim fingers into Albus's tea.

Just as Minerva was going to censure the Royal guest for such an uncivil and pointless display, the girl shifted into a larger male form. One that she knew well.

"Harry Potter! What is the meaning of this?" Minerva shrieked out her question almost before she could formulate it. Even with the large scale prank that had just finished reversing itself, the student body of Hogwarts was again surprised by Harry's change. Rumors began to spread of his 'confirmed' metamorphmagus abilities.

Harry smirked in a way that both infuriated and flustered the Deputy Headmistress. She desperately wanted to pull James Potter back from the afterlife and give him a week's detention for passing the Potter smirk on to his son.

"I take it you've never heard of the Pools of Sorrow, a cursed training ground deep in western China?" He looked between Minerva and Albus, both of whom seemed to draw blanks. "Well, it's quite the story, but I'm sure the First Years need to get some rest."

"Can I trust you to keep to Hogwarts grounds, Mr. Potter?" Harry nodded. "Very well. There are things we need to discuss, but they can wait for tomorrow. Why don't you rejoin your friends and I'll dismiss the students for the night."

Harry nodded and returned to Gryffindor Table. As he neared Ron and Hermione, Usagi slid out of Harry's mind and appeared next to him.

"_I still can't believe that worked." _ Harry called out in Japanese.

"_You already said that, Harry. I knew we were going to be fine the whole time."_ Harry could see Usagi's confidence in her face and movements.

Several Gryffindors and Ravenclaws in hearing range paused for a moment. When had the Boy-Who-Lived ever shown a talent for languages? Well, there was the Chamber of Secrets... maybe Harry's abilities were wider than just the snake language?

"_I wish I had your confidence." _

"_Two things, Harry. Our daughter, for one. How can she exist if some crusty old school headmaster manages to split us up?" _Harry paused for a moment. _"And then there is Pluto. I always know that the shit hasn't hit the fan yet until she shows up. Don't tell her I said this, but in my own head she's my Personal Fan Un-shitter."_

Harry snickers before responding. _"That's a good one! In my head, I call … her... er."_ Oops.

Usagi saw Harry's blush and knew it had to be good.

"_Come on Harry, don't leave me in the dark!" _Usagi began to zip back and forth in front of her living lover much to the shock of other students and to the amusement of the castle ghosts. They all wanted to get to know the New Girl.

"_Soooo. Have you decided where you want to sleep at night?"_

Harry was about to sit down when the entire student body was dismissed for the night. With Hermione helping this year's new prefects in shepherding the First Years, and Ron being dragged along against his will, Harry wondered who he could use to derail Usagi's question.

"_You going back to school isn't going to change my schedule at all, Harry, and I still want to know what you call Setsuna I mean if you won't tell me then I'll just have to keep guessing and guessing until I get it right because you know, Harry, now that I'm a ghost I can talk and talk and talk and a really don't have to breath in between sentences or anything and I'm sooooo going to annoy the hell out of those girls that keep looking at you because you are mine and I'm not sure when the next time I'll feel like sharing is going to be-"_

Please Satan, rise from your fiery pits and take Harry now. If Usagi is going to use this technique to get what she wants in the future then Harry was really going to have to find some way to fend off the hellish assault.

"_Oh, but I really want you to share him with me because there are a lot of old rituals to be found in the restricted section that require pairs of nude lovers to explore each other under moonlight at various times of the year and you being Moon Royalty you should really appreciate that. deep breath in And then there are also a lot of three-way positions that you can't cover with Hermione's help alone so you really need to let someone else into the relationship and since I've got long blonde hair it would be more like sleeping with Usagi than you can get with Hermione "_

" _and the name Luna is kind of connected to my line "_

" _and my mother's name was Selene which is another Moon based name "_

" _but Lovegood would sound more like you're a descendant of Minako's family or something "_

"_You win! Hotness! I call her Hotness in my head! Please for the love of God stop that talking thing the two of you are doing." _ Harry placed his hands over his ears and began to beat his head into the stone corridor wall.

Other students passed by as far from Harry as they could get. He really couldn't tell if they were trying to keep away from a verbal tennis match that the twins would be envious of or his own self-destructive head bashing. Maybe it was both.

As the ringing in his ears slowly dropped to manageable levels, Harry noticed Usagi and Luna waving goodbye to each other. As Luna turned a corner heading for Ravenclaw tower, Usagi drifted back over to Harry's lightly blooded patch of wall.

"_What? Did you think I'd be jealous or something? She is like totally super hot. I think I'll call her 'Hotness' too!"_ Usagi thought for a moment. _"I like my nickname better anyway. Still, I can't figure out if she would like being called Hotness or not."_

"_I couldn't tell you. I can't seem to get one up on her." _ Harry abandoned his wall of pain and continued on to Gryffindor Tower.

"_It's not just you Harry. I don't think anyone has gotten one up on her in a really, really long time."_

_

* * *

_

"Rise, Rookwood." Dark Lord Voldemort was tiring of servants who didn't have enough intelligence to get things done right. It was time to use someone with a brain.

Augustus Rookwood was someone that even Voldemort would admit was an extremely intelligent man.

"I have heard a lot of rumors about Potter, the Moon Princess and that ghost that follows them around. Look into them." Rookwood knew exactly what his Lord meant. He had supplied the Dark Lord with half of the intelligence himself.

As Rookwood nodded, a parchment appeared on the hand rest of his throne. Rookwood stood motionless as his Lord read the missive. Soon enough, Voldemort flung the letter itself to Rookwood's feet.

"Look into this one as well. Dismissed." Rookwood recovered the letter and left his Lord's throne room respectfully.

As the man mentally cataloged the various methods of... research available to him, he scanned through the student report detailing Hogwarts' Opening Feast and Potter's elaborate performance. The Pools of Sorrow? Augustus was sure he'd heard that name before somewhere. But where?

* * *

Honolulu, Hawaii

6am September 1st, 1996

"Well, I think you did great."

Two Asian women were walking down Kapiolani Boulevard. They didn't stand out in the early morning crowd, for once, due to the mix of club goers, tourists and strippers which were busy either going home for the night or getting an early start on the tour route.

Shampoo of the Joketsuzoku looked around her and noted this location. It was rare for a member of her tribe traveling outside of Jusenkyo valley to find a city or town that could become an outpost. With Hawaii's mix of East and West, not to mention the open use of several languages, her tribe could even set up a colony here and no-one else would notice.

Great-Grandmother Cologne would want to hear about Honolulu, Shampoo was sure of it.

Her mental planning was derailed when she noticed, for the thousandth time, that her travel partner was pouting big time.

"That girl will think twice about challenging 'red headed whores' in the future." Shampoo was trying to get Ranma out of this mental rut that the redhead had gotten herself into.

Ranma Saotome, martial arts living legend, God-Killer, had turned into a whiny bitch. Shampoo could hardly decipher half of what the aquatransexual was muttering, but it probably has something to do with a challenge she accepted earlier.

"And.... in one night, you completely refilled our money belts. It's enough money that we can consider air travel or a cruise line as options to reach California, Ranma. No cargo holds this time!"

"Well... there is that. I'm starving. Let's get some food and then find a place to sleep." Shampoo should have tried food as a distraction already. Damn, too much big city life is making her go soft.

"If you don't like what happened tonight, then maybe now you will remember not to accept every challenge that gets tossed out there. Honestly, Ranma, she wasn't even a fighter."

Ranma said nothing as she brought up one of the six inch stripper shoes she was carrying and scratched the top of her head with it's stiletto heel.

"Maybe you're right." As the two turned into a twenty-four hour buffet restaurant, Shampoo teased Ranma by re-adjusting the redhead's 'Club Femme Nu 1996 Exotic Dancer Champion' sash. It was sure to get more than a little attention in a restaurant full of young sailors.

**Chapter End**

**Dirty Omake – Lav-Lav, Pav-Pav and Pad-Pad**

"Gawd, that's disgusting!" Princess Serenity number Thirty-eight, also known as Lavender Brown, blurted out.

"I didn't do anything?" Parvati Patil, who is currently The Chosen-One-of-Ninety-Four, looked on with as innocent and clueless an expression as 'he' could make. He failed miserably as most blokes tend to do after climax. The innocent part is what they fail at; clueless is easy.

"Then why is my hand covered in your seed?!"

Princess Serenity-Brown slowly pulled her hand out of Harry Potter-Patil's pants. A thick, sticky line of white fluid snaked its way from her palm to her elbow.

"Is that Patil seed, or is it Potter's? Hmmm.... Anyway, there must be more to being a bloke that writing your name in the snow and asking girls to 'kiss it'." Twenty points to Ravenclaw, Miss Patil.

"I don't have any idea how these things work. I've only been a bloke for, like, twelve minutes now." Parvati was feeling really, really relaxed at the moment and her sister's barbs weren't effecting her like they normally would.

"And it only took you five minutes to get Lavender's hand inside your knickers. I think most boys I know would be impressed." Padma ignored the teenaged porn failure developing on the opposite bench and continued reading this year's Charms text.

"Shows what a whore your best friend is, then, yeah?" Lavender may have asked Parvati the question, but it was aimed at Padma.

"Shut it! You're not a whore. Whores get paid, you know." That backhanded compliment was courtesy of Parvati.

"Oh, so I'm easy then? I'm a slag am I?" The Moon Princess crossed her arms under her chest and glared at Faux Harry. Bad move. Potter-Patil man seed was now spreading up and down both of Lav-Lav's arms.

"If you want Harry Potter to eat your pussy on the Hogwarts Express, then yes, you are!"

Padma continued to listen to the two Gryffindors even as she read. Pav-Pav was acting a bit out of sorts... maybe it was the new plumbing affecting her... him... whatever. Could her sister feel the effects of her monthly visitor in a male body?

Padma idly wondered if anyone trustworthy would like to participate in a polyjuice research project this year about behavioral differences due to sex. She was feeling a bit randy herself, truth be known.

"Well... okay, I'm a slag. But just for the train ride! Or, if the real Harry Potter wants what I have to offer, then I'm a slag for him too!" Lavender knew her own morals and knew that both Patils knew them too.

"Right then. Well, Princess, it looks like Mister Potter is about ready for another go. Are you up for some oral and then a good shagging?" Princess Serenity-Brown smiled and got on her knees before the re-inflating Patil-Who-Lived.

"Oh bloody hell!" Parvati hissed out a few head-bobs later, "I can see why they like this so much!"

As Parvati's eyes started rolling into the back of their sockets, Padma looked over the lip of her book.

Maybe they wouldn't notice if she slipped a hand under her robe and did a little relaxing. She wasn't perving at all! It was... research on, umn, intimate relationships. Then Harry and Ron's debts would be paid.

Harry owed the Patil girls this much after that ghastly Yule ball experience.

**End Dirty Omake**


	2. Ghost Pimp

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Two: Ghost Pimp**

September 2nd, 1996

Harry could barely keep his head out of the bacon and eggs this morning.

He went to bed last night full of energy, the sweet taste of victory over getting the Headmaster to make an extended oath combined with his return to Gryffindor Tower had him bouncing about the common room as though he were high. High on life, perhaps, as Luna had yet to hand over anything that required smoking. When Usagi finally did manage to coax Harry to bed, they celebrated in epic fashion for more than two hours. Noise muffling charms are useful things.

This celebration is, of course, directly responsible for his absolute lack of energy this morning. Harry spent all of it staying awake till past three in the morning. Really, Harry expected this kind of morning and was hoping to offset his drowsiness with orange juice and a hearty breakfast.

"You are a sick boy, Harry. Does the Crown Princess know you've been unfaithful?" Dean Thomas had uttered the line with a little heat behind the words. Was he serious?

"Did you know we could see the glow your 'friend' cast behind your curtains? The glow was there well past midnight, Harry." Seamus Finnigan added. You could hear the pervy implication in every word.

"What I want to know is what can you do with a ghost girl at all hours. Surely it can't be very good, whatever it is." Dean again. Bugger. Several known gossips had heard the questions and were none too discretely listening in.

"I was not cheating on the Crown Princess. She knows all about it. Next time you see her, ask her yourself."

"I will then." Seriously Dean, when did Harry's love life matter to you?

Might as well have fun with it then, eh? "I can't promise you the same experience exactly, but you might try chatting up Myrtle or the Grey Lady if you really want to know. I will say that the ghost in question has to be a willing participant, so don't go jumping through the first female ghost you see or anything."

Several nearby Gryffindors were watching Hermione as she ate just across the table from Harry. Nothing. Not one reaction. Maybe she's mentally indexing her personal library or something equally brainy. In truth, Hermione was listening to Harry's explanation and comparing it to what she knew about ghosts. She could tell from Harry's tone that he was being both playful and truthful at the same time. Was he actually trying to get Myrtle shagged?

"But... but Harry, surely you don't mean that ghosts are actually interested in sex, do you? Wouldn't we already know about it?" Good point, Nev.

"Well... Usagi's been dead for about a year so she's not very experienced at being dead. That may have something to do with it. Now Myrtle, she's been dead for, like, fifty years or something. Students have been either ignoring or ridiculing her the whole time. If you treat her like you would a living girl then she may end up being less… er… cold to you."

Most of the students listening took Harry's reply as a joke and quickly forgot it. Most mind you, not all. Myrtle was about to become more popular with the boys now than when she was alive.

While Harry already had a ghost mistress, this conversation was a good reminder that Myrtle could use someone to talk to. Oh! She'd surely love to meet another young girl ghost, even one who wasn't so good at English just yet. Maybe she could help Usagi learn English?

Harry was beginning to think that it might be a good idea to go down to the Chamber of Secrets again, too. Surely a Basilisk only counted as one secret and the place's very name hinted at more than one.

Harry noticed the gossip mongers begin to break up at about the same time that Hermione began to shake in excitement in her seat across the table from him. Considering what today was, that could mean only one thing.

Harry looked to the head of Gryffindor Table to see Professor McGonagall handing class schedules to each student in turn. Brilliant! Let's see what classes Harry will be way too tired to do well in today.

"Good morning, Professor McGonagall. I hope you are well." Even with everything that happened this summer, Hermione still hasn't completely lost her love of authority figures.

"Very well, thank you Miss Granger." The Deputy Headmistress turned to Harry. "Mister Potter, the Headmaster has scheduled a meeting after your last class of the day. I trust you can make your own way to his office by now."

"Yes, Professor. Will you be attending?"

"I hadn't planned on it. Do you still mistrust the Headmaster even after the oath he took for you last night?" Minerva had lost a great deal of the respect she held for Albus this summer, but he was still the Headmaster.

"It isn't that, Professor. I thought that you may wish to hear my description of Jusenkyo. It's a remarkable place with natural transfiguration magic just waiting for victims to fall into rather innocent looking pools of water. Changed my life, it did. Sometimes I look at the mirror and I don't even recognize myself."

"And sometimes, we don't recognize you either, mate." Ron had to comment, as Ginny followed Harry's little speech with a goblet of cold milk over the head.

"I see." Minerva was quite impressed. Harry changed from male to female in the blink of an eye. Even a true master of the animagus process such as herself takes longer. "Perhaps I shall re-examine my schedule then. Good day, Mister Potter."

Harry nodded as her Head of House continued with her duties. Unfortunately, her good mood evaporated when she finally saw just what classes she would be too tired for today.

"Well, bugger all. Gin-Gin? Hot water, please!" The readhead was eager to comply.

After a quick brace of cleaning and drying charms, all silently cast, Harry collected his books and prepared for a foul morning.

* * *

As Harry stepped into the darkened Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. There was that suspicious red glow visible in the corner of his vision, too.

Harry pushed off of Ron, sending himself further into the room and Ron back into Hermione. As Harry bounced off of the floor, a red jet of magic shot through where both he and Ron used to be. Harry rolled onto his knees.

"Protego! Stupefy!" Luckily for the nervous students sitting to either side of Harry's attack, his spell was seemingly on target. Red light splashed over a shield surrounding a bit of floor that his attacker must be located on.

As quickly as his ambush started, it stopped again.

"Five points for dodging the spell and pushing your ally out of harm's way. Five more points for a quick shield and return fire. Five points off, however for using something as weak as stupefy on an unknown assailant and another five points off for shouting out the names of your spells." Severus Snape dropped his cloaking magic and raised the lighting level of the room. "Potter! Real wizards only cast aloud when they want to impress you with an advanced spell or scare you with a nasty curse."

"Then teach us how to do it right!" He really wasn't thinking at the moment, as all of Harry's actions up to this point were more reactive than anything.

Severus Snape sneered.

"I intend to."

Defense Against the Dark Arts would turn out to be a real kick in the pants for every student in every class. None were spared, not even the Snakes. Severus wanted his House to survive this war even if he had to break the little twerps of their pampered ways one tear at a time.

"Malfoy! Potter! To the front of the class and fight!" Draco began to rise out of his seat. Clearly he expected to be given a chance to mess with Scarhead, but 'fight'? Not 'duel'?

"Rules, Sir?" Harry had to ask as he didn't expect there to be any. Both boys began the trek up.

"No Unforgivables. Try not to die up there. You will begin casting as soon as both of you clear the front row." Okay, not a duel.

"I'm going to make you beg, Scarhead." Malfoy was red in the face, all of his embarrassment from the train incident bubbled to the surface.

"Crabbe may be into that, Malfoy, but I'm only attracted to girls." Harry smiled. He thought it was quite funny to see Draco reach a very Vernon-esque purple.

"Any last words, Potter?" Malfoy stepped past the last student in his row and drew his wand.

"Your love of blokes… did you get that from your Mum or your Dad?" Draco finally lost it. Harry was still passing by Lavender when a blasting curse flew out of Draco's wand.

Harry's 'saving people' thing kicked in. A Holly and Phoenix feather wand emerged from Lavender's hair near her right ear and Harry cast a shield charm. Lav-Lav had never been so close to a curse-shield impact and nearly fainted from the emotional shock. Harry quickly sprinted past the edge of the front row and tried to jump out of the way of Draco's follow up curse. That second one tore a chunk out of Harry's right thigh. Screaming from the pain, the Gryffindor Golden Boy rolled behind Snape's desk for cover.

Draco sneered and decided to grandstand a little.

"What's wrong, Potty? A weak half-blood like yourself unable to stand against real power?" Draco turned his wand on the other Gryffindors and therefore didn't see the soft white flash that Hermione recognized as being from Harry's scepter. "Who do I have to kill to get you to show your worthless face?"

Not surprisingly, the class did not get to learn the answer to Draco's question as Harry banished the professor's desk right into Draco. It was Draco's turn to express his pain incoherently while he struggled to get free of the desk that pinned him down. Harry immediately ran around the desk and pointed two wands at Draco's temple.

"Hold! Potter, back to your desk." Snape waved his wand, setting his desk back where it was supposed to go. A second wave and all of his paperwork and writing materials returned to their original positions. "Zambini, get Malfoy back to his desk."

As Blaise moved forward and Lav-Lav got her heart to slow down, a high pitched squeal from Malfoy drew Snape's attention. The desk must have broke his arm.

"Potter, you're in charge of healing anyone who goes back to their desk injured." Snape saw his self healing move behind the desk. It'll save time if no-one needs to see Madam Pomfrey.

"Parkinson! Granger! Up front and fight. Do try not to involve the other students, I'll take away house points if any more stray spells hit the wrong target." Both witches were frozen in their chairs. "What are you two waiting for? We've got a lot of ground to cover and I need to see how many of you are likely to be alive a year from today. It's not looking good so far. Get up!"

Severus Snape would quickly learn that Potter was at the top of his class. As Snape was able to see over a dozen things wrong with the Gryffindor's performance, this was not good news.

* * *

"Ara…hello?" Usagi floated gently into the girls loo on the second floor. Moaning Myrtle's loo.

"And what's this then?" She heard the voice come from a stall half-way down the row of water closets.

"Ohayo goz- er… good morning. My name Usagi. You are Myrtle?" The Tokyo native drifted a little closer to where the other girl's voice was coming from.

At first, Usagi thought that the other girl must have run off. Harry said that she didn't get many visitors and may be a little skittish. Before she could give up, however, a transparent head slowly rose over the wooden dividers.

"Another one? Poor Dear, did the monster get you too?" Myrtle phased through the divider and came up to Usagi in the middle of the room.

"So sorry. Usagi not kill by monster. Usagi fall in spring in China. Usagi boyfriend is Harry Potter, so Usagi come to Hogwarts with Harry." Usagi was really glad that Harry let her possess him for such a long time the other day. She now feels much more comfortable talking in English because of her time with the translator ring.

"Boyfriend? Harry is your boyfriend?" Myrtle had narrowed her eyes and seemed to be getting some color in her cheeks.

"Yes!" Usagi leaned in and whispered, a spectral blush on her cheeks. "We having much dirty fun in bed."

"But… but… when did he die?" Myrtle was getting quite upset. The first boy to pay a lick of attention to her in decades and when he died he got a foreign girlfriend. What rotten luck.

"Oh, very sorry. Harry not dead. Only me." Usagi smiled her very best 'let's be friends' smile. It's never failed her before.

"So you're telling me that… that Harry Potter is alive?"

"Yes."

"And he has a girlfriend?"

"Yes."

"And she's a ghost?"

"Yes!"

"And he has sex with her?"

"Oh, yes!"

"And… she... isn't… me?"

"Ara! Shimatta…. Er, no?" Bonding with the only other dead teenaged girl in school seemed like such a good idea before that last line, too.

"You goddamn boyfriend stealing slag! I'll get you for this!"

"Ah! So sorry!" Usagi flew out of that loo like the hounds of Hell were on her heels. It was a very understandable reaction as Myrtle had become enraged enough to have near Peeves level telekinetic control and began to hurl random objects at the man stealing whore.

Morning classes may have been in session, but that didn't stop the two dead girls from making one hell of a commotion on their high speed spectral chase. Walls posed no obstacle and floors meant nothing as two girls passed through at least ten different people and dozens of rooms. Usagi once got as far as fifty meters away before making the mistake of stopping in a corridor to figure out where she was. Seconds later, a feminine battle cry sounded down the cavern-like stone corridor, badly spooking the First Year Potions class nearby and causing three cauldrons to explode.

"_I've had enough of this shit!"_ Usagi pulled her ace in the hole and instantly shifted herself to Harry's side.

"Bloody whore!" A heavily panting Myrtle ground out. She calmed herself and remembered that dead girls don't need to pant if they don't want to.

"This isn't over! Not at all you little bint!" Upon hearing a door open behind her, Myrtle spun around.

"What is the meaning of this? Myrtle? My class is a mess, young lady. I never thought I'd be taking twenty points from Ravenclaw for a disruptive ghost." Behind Professor Slughorn, Myrtle could hear the sounds of three or four students openly crying.

Revenge. Myrtle needed revenge now. But where could the bitch be? Potter... She would have run to her 'boyfriend', right? As their chase had already passed through the Potions and Charms classes, she would try D.A.D.A. next.

Seconds earlier, a panicky Usagi materialized next to Harry. Harry was used to her doing this and continued on as normal. Neville was absolutely not used to her doing that and miscast his blasting hex.

The chalkboard near Professor Snape's head disintegrated in a shower of splinters.

"Twenty points from Gryffindor and a detention tonight, Longbottom!" Snape looked at the spirit hovering nervously around Harry. "Get rid of her Potter!"

Harry looked at his girl only to see that she was rapidly scanning every nook of the room for something.

"_Get in my head now! We'll talk about it when__ things calm down." _ Usagi nodded and leapt at his face. The other students looked a little slack-jawed to see a ghost enter a person through their nose, but Harry didn't flinch.

Just as the class was about to get under way again, Myrtle blew through the back wall.

"Where the hell did she go!" Myrtle was seething with hatred.

Everyone except for Harry, Harry's close friends and Professor Snape pointed right to him.

"Haaar-ryyy?" Myrtle didn't see the other ghost, but everyone was pointing at him.

"We're in the middle of a class, Myrtle. Can't this wait until lunch or something?"

"Where did the boyfriend stealing slag go, Harry?"

"Potter! If you don't get her out of my classroom…" No Gryffindor wanted Snape to finish that sentence.

"Permission to talk to her out in the hall for a minute, Sir?"

"Any longer and it'll be twenty points." As Harry thought he'd lose fifty the moment everyone pointed at him, he was fine with Snape's threat.

Harry nodded to Snape and motioned for Myrtle to follow him out the door, which she did. Had Harry been paying more attention, he might have noticed several charms being thrown at the door and wall behind him as he stepped through.

"Alright, Myrtle. What's this all about?" Harry was more than a bit irritated at the moment. His class had been hell so far, but never in a way that he'd ever experienced hell in a D.A.D.A. classroom before. Snape was pushing them _hard_.

"The chink bitch. The one who says she's had sex with you. Who is she and why are you doing things with her?" Myrtle's anger was falling into depression. Ghost or not, Harry could see tears beginning to form.

Any sympathy Harry may have had for Myrtle left at the racial slur.

"First, she's Japanese, not Chinese. Second, 'chink' is a word I don't want to hear describing Usagi or any other Asian in this castle. Third, why are you so angry? I told Usagi that you two might have a lot in common as the two of you both died as teenagers. Don't you want more friends?" Deep breaths, Harry. Merlin, how could this possibly get worse?

"Harry. You were the first boy to talk to me in decades. I offered to share my bathroom with you if you died. Now, not only do I find that you have a girlfriend and she's a ghost… she isn't ME!" Myrtle's tears began to spill over as her famous moan began to fill the hall.

Shite, it got worse. What can he possible say in fifteen seconds to fix this?

"Mytle? Myrtle! Look, Myrtle, I can fix this. I can make you happy."

"Y- y- you c-can? H-h-hoooowwwwww?" She wasn't quieting down, but she was looking at him.

"Right! Um... Just this morning… just this morning I was telling blokes in Gryffindor that you were worth talking to and that they should treat you better. I'll… I'll help you get a boyfriend. How about that?" No time!

Myrtle paused for a moment or two, thinking the offer over.

"O-okay. If y-you can get me a b-boyfriend, then I'll f-forgive you for cheating on me."

"What? Cheating on- you know what? Fine. Deal. Give me a bit of time to see who's interested… there's got to be one or two blokes out there that can appreciate what you have to offer once I tell them what it is you have to offer. Right?" She paused again but nodded. Moments later she floated up through the ceiling.

"A minute, twenty-five." Hermione offered helpfully once Harry re-entered the room. For some reason, he was still the focus everyone's attention.

"I don't believe, Mister Potter, that I ever accused your father of being a ghost pimp. Congratulations. You have exceeded my expectations." Severus turned to the rest of the class. "Now, if you are all done listening to Mister Potter's deviant behavior, then maybe I can still teach you something useful before I kill myself for the hopelessness of it all…"

* * *

"Well, Scarhead, looks like your fun will be over soon." Harry was beginning to think that Draco should have gotten into Dinner Theatre. Smirking little weasel. He seems to crave the attention he can get by starting something during a meal in the Great Hall.

"And what's got your knickers in a twist now, Malfoy?" Draco colored at Harry's insult. Finally! Harry finally had a go-to insult that would always get Malfoy to lose control in gender identity issues. Yes, it is highly ironic.

"You openly admitted to having sex with that ghost. You don't deny she's your girl, which, by the way is quite sick, and that means that you are cheating on your Crown Princess. How stupid are you? A ghost? Not even a Veela or something?" Malfoy had regained his smirk, people were listening. Crabbe smirked and Pansy added her annoying giggle to the mix.

Harry could see this ruining his good boy image for the year if he didn't take care of things quickly. At any other time, that would be just fine by him as he's learned to deal with the distrust and fear that comes with the rumors and lies that have been spread about him before. Not this time.

This time, Harry recognized the need to play along- or rather, to actively play the lead in the drama called Harry's life. If he didn't, then his fame wouldn't help in the war. For once in his life Harry wanted the Chosen One image, and he would not allow Malfoy to take it from him.

Only one problem, mate: Harry can't deny his relationship to Usagi the ghost in favor of Usagi the living girl. How can he when they're the same girl? Only… try telling the world that.

Maybe he could?

_~Harry?~_

_~Usagi? I'd quite forgotten that you were in there.~_

_~Let me take this one, Harry.~_

_~Are you sure?~_

_~Please.~_

Draco was about to launch into another rant at Harry's pause when he saw the crescent begin to glow on Harry's forehead.

Harry looked down at the table for a moment before sticking his fingers into a goblet of ice water.

"Don't think pretending to be some damned Princess is going to get you out of this one, Potter." Malfoy snarled out the last line. If Harry wanted to see what it felt like to get hexed as a girl, then Malfoy would be glad to help.

'Harry's' gaze returned to the Slytherin ponce for a second before she closed her blue eyes. Lunar power flared around her, quickly growing and washing into the visible spectrum. Draco and his supporting cast backed away with their eyes mostly covered to block the pure white magic release.

When the magical power surge receded, the lunch crowd began to wonder if Harry was pretending. If he was, then he was rather good at it. Silver hair flowed down her back in to elegant tails which ended scant inches from the stone floor. She wore the same imperial gown that caused such a fuss in the Wizengamot chamber along with all of the matching jewelry.

Princess Serentiy was officially making her second appearance in magical England. First, if you judge it from her temporal perspective.

"I trust you can tell the difference between myself and my Intended now?" Harry's friends all nodded their heads in silent support. Everyone else stood still in silent confusion. Serenity's words began to fill the Great Hall, taking advantage of the same acoustic enchantments which allow the Headmaster to deliver his mealtime speeches.

"Yes, it is rather confusing, I suppose, so I shall try to make it simple for you." She turned from Malfoy to address the room as a whole. "I, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity, had... a little accident... in a very dangerous place. The details need not concern you, but the effect is that I am trapped in the form of a ghost for most of the time. My Beloved, gentleman that he is, has elected to keep me company even in my ghost form until I can be set right again… so before anyone present tries to give him any trouble for caring for his future wife in her hour of need, I ask that you kindly sod off."

The Crown Princess took a deep breath, reveling in the experience before her eyes fell again to the lunch sitting half eaten on Harry's plate.

"Roast beef! Awesome!" Usagi lost a bit of her respectability when she dropped into Harry's seat and began stuffing her face with food. Several dishes were things she's only seen on TV and just had to try.

_~Usagi?~_

_~Yes, Harry?~_

_~Was admitting that you're dead a good idea?~_

_~I didn't say I was dead. Now be a good Dread Pirate Roberts and be quiet so Princess Buttercup can get some more mashed potatoes.~_

_~Alright, just don't say that out loud. You're **my** Princess Buttercup and I don't want the others to know we've started using cutesy pet names already.~_

_~As you wish.~_

"Hey, Ron. Are you going to eat that?"

* * *

Harry entered the Gryffindor Common Room closely followed by many of her yearmates. For her part, Harry felt the need to relax a bit and get some focus before the her meeting with Dumbledore.

"Not changing back, mate?" Ron glanced over to the blonde who had yet to even cast a drying charm on herself.

"Why bother? You get used to it after a while. Well... Ranma says you do. I'm trying not to let it bother me." Harry grabbed her chest and tried to re-arrange the load some. Ron tried to look away, he really did.

"Harry! Stop that right this instant!" Hermione's yell quickly made Harry the focus of the whole common room.

"What? They're mine aren't they? They're bloody uncomfortable right now." Harry gave her shirt one last tug before dropping onto a sofa near the fireplace.

"Harry, I think they mine. But... Usag- I let you touch. Please not to let others watch." The spirit of Harry's Love came through the Portrait behind everyone else, not that the walls would stop her, but some times she forgets.

"Thanks love. Your English is getting better!" Harry ran her hand down Usagi's face in a way that made the specter giggle. _"You should spend more time in my body. Maybe you could become fluent before the end of the year."_

"So, 'Mione. What are you going to do with it?" Ron shot off his question as he pulled out a chocolate frog. A few chocolatey snacks might just tide him over until dinner.

Hermione pulled a potion vial out of her robes and swirled the seemingly molten gold fluid around.

"I don't know yet. I was so nervous about getting the Draught of Living Death right that I haven't even begun to think of what I could do with liquid luck." Hermione rubbed her thumb over the side of the vial before stuffing it back deep into her robes.

"It's a good thing Draco's potion mysteriously went bad while I was asking Professor Slughorn about my parents, isn't it Ron?" Ron nervously nodded. When Hermione narrowed her eyes at the boys- er boy and girl, they both nervously looked away.

"What did you do?"

"We most certainly did not out snake a snake, did we Ron?" Harry was looking away when she said it.

"Not at all. Why, who wouldn't want the sneaky ponce to get his hands on that potion. Surely he's far too trustworthy to abuse such useful stuff." If only hating Malfoy were a N.E.W.T. level course, then Ron could teach it.

"Well... I've been looking for an excuse to practice basic ward schemes. Now I've got one." Hermione knew just which book to grab out of her trunk too.

* * *

"Simply amazing." Albus Dumbledore was impressed.

"And you've just scraped the surface. China and Japan may not have the wizarding population that Europe has, but they're not lacking in magic. It just takes different forms, really." Harry, still in her female form, was now standing in the Headmaster's office next to the Deputy Headmistress and the Headmaster. Both of her elders were gazing back into the pensive that the three had just emerged from.

"So this is the animagus-like ability you wrote to Miss Granger and Miss Weasley about... remarkable. Were it not for the dark times we face here in England, I may have been tempted to go research Jusenkyo personally." Albus had seen a lot in his time, but never had he seen the likes of Jusenkyo before. This was really turning out to be a year of firsts for the man. All thanks to this young man - and at times young woman – who he had sought to make into a weapon.

Much as Albus saw the world through different colored lenses now, that did not change the prophesy one bit. Perhaps he could revisit his analysis of the wording, though.

"I'm sure Fawkes remembers where it is, but you have to remember that sane, normal people never go there on purpose. Walk into Jusenkyo valley with the best of intentions and I bet you a lifetime supply of lemon drops that you come back with a curse, one not of your choosing." Albus still had that gleam in his eye. "They're not all shapely young women, either. Most aren't even human. Dogs. Cats. Hindu Demon Goddesses. They seem to have one of everything. The spring I fell in should be named the Spring of Drowned Magical Alien Princess Super Veela but I believe that it is still referred to as the Spring of Drowned I don't Know Who She Is."

Both school officials looked at him with a hint of amusement.

"Well, I admit that they don't have the allure that Fleur has but all Senshi are super hot. Even with all the blokes knowing it's me, Harry 'BOY-Who-Lived' Potter, in this body, I've still caught loads of blokes checking me out." Harry shivered for a moment. "That is the creepiest thing I've ever experienced. I begin to understand why girls get so irate at us boys at times. Bloody annoying."

"Language, Mister Potter. Or should I say Miss Potter?" Minerva was having entirely too much fun with this.

"Sorry Professor. I may look like the girl I'm going to marry, but I still think like me, so Mister is better."

Albus noticed something about his collection of magical trinkets and detectors that shocked him while Deputy Headmistress was busy remonstrating Miss Potter. One trinket which should be pointing directly at Mister Potter was not. He looked again at Harry's forehead.

"Harry, would you mind terribly returning to your birth form for a moment?"

Harry nodded. After finding the Headmaster's desk rather lacking in hot water, she pulled out her old wand and proceeded to wordlessly cast her cup-water-hot spell chain. She failed to notice how impressed both Albus and Minerva were that she could do wordless magic well ahead of her class level. Two fingers in the cup later and Harry once again had his bits back.

Albus quickly recovered from seeing Harry unknowingly show an advanced level of personal control and looked again at Harry's scar. Why didn't he see this at the Opening Feast?

"Harry, when did your scar start to fade?" Albus's words gave Minerva the jolt necessary to have a look for herself.

"By Merlin, your scar! It's finally healed properly. Did something happen, Mister Potter?" She couldn't help herself and reached out to trace over Harry's nearly invisible scar with her index finger. "Did Princess Serenity do this?"

Harry wasn't absolutely sure, but her abilities in healing magic could have done the trick and Jusenkyo didn't seem like a likely candidate. He nodded.

"May we see a memory of the event which lead to your healing?"

While Harry suspected he knew when she did it, that wasn't something Harry was willing to show the Headmaster.

"I'm sorry sir, but that is something private between Usagi and me." Both Headmaster and Deputy Headmistress frowned at the refusal.

"Harry, this is very important. I need to know precisely how she healed you." Albus added his best 'I'm disappointed in you' look to the frowns.

"I will not betray Usagi's trust, not for any reason. All you need to know is that it was easy for her, or have you forgotten what she's done in Diagon Alley twice now?" Harry would not give the Headmaster what he wanted without Usagi's approval.

Of course, from the Headmaster's perspective, the defiant Gryffindor let slip plenty. Not what he wanted, but perhaps enough. Albus began filtering through the best ways to approach the Crown Princess for help without letting slip exactly what she'll need to do. Crown Princess or not, horcruxes are a vital secret that must be closely guarded even from those he would enlist to eliminate the remaining soul containers.

"Very well, Harry. Is there anything you would be willing to show us of your journey? Something that you feel may be of value to the war effort without interfering with your Intended's privacy?" At least he was asking nicely.

As it does on occasion, inspiration struck Harry. His idea may not bear fruit quickly, but then how often do you get the chance to debate the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy with the Supreme Mugwump?

"I would like to show you some things, things I did as Heather Snape." That got their attention. "Think of it as an essay, in memory form, on the benefits of using magic freely in the non-magical world."

"You'll be casting magic in front of muggles, then?" His Head of House would obviously need some convincing. Surely the Headmaster would as well.

"I will be showing you that magic can save lives and prevent crimes like rape and assault. The Wizarding World has tens of thousands of citizens capable of doing things that the non-magical world would call super-human. By hiding ourselves away, I think that more harm is being done to both of our worlds than you realize." Harry paused to see how much flak his intent would receive. No immediate response... "I would like to show you an example of the good that can be done when two worlds mix freely. The Japanese know, as a nation, that magic is real, even if other countries don't quite believe them yet. At least the others don't _officially_ recognize magic. Really, I wouldn't be surprised to find that other governments know more than they let on."

While Albus had heard such claims before, he hadn't really given them much consideration. To be fair, he was still taking special lemon drops the last time someone, a young Lily Evans actually, said the exact same thing.

"You really are your mother's son, Harry. Lily made similar claims during her stay at Hogwarts on several occasions." Harry almost lost his train of thought. For too long, all anyone would tell him about his mother was that he had her eyes. It was only just today that he got more than eye color out of Slughorn. Harry resolved to spend more time with the Slytherin professor whenever possible as the old Slytherin Potions Master admired, even adored his mother. Harry could hardly believe it.

There must have been some dust floating about, as the elders in the room gave Harry a moment to rub it clear of his eyes.

"Please do show us Miss Snape at her prime. I would like to see how well the papers did portraying her." Albus had his twinkle back, but Harry didn't seem concerned this time. It doesn't always have to be a bad sign, right?

Harry gave them exactly what Dumbledore asked for: a pensive Best Of collection. They got to see the Nippon Budokan, but only after the girls had already transformed. They got to see Heather save Miyako and Ehara-sensei. Harry even included some of the festivities at Bandai's Teen Witch toy release at Hakuhinkan Toy Park. In a move that was meant to be equally impressive and spiteful, Harry provided his second most important appearance after Tokyo Tower: the first appearance of the Goddess of Diagon Alley. They would not see Tokyo Tower, not with the spell he cast in free fall.

By the time that Harry, Minerva and Albus returned from the pensive, Albus was very pensive. Minerva was shaking from the stress of merely watching Harry return Hermione's soul to her mortal body. Harry tried and failed to hide his tears. God, but that was a hard memory to relive.

A ghost materialized next to the crying boy.

"Harry, I having long talk with ghosts Nick and Peeves and Myrt- Harry!" Usagi just noticed his emotional state. She suddenly zipped between her beloved and the room's two other occupants. _"I may be dead but you will be sorry if you don't undo whatever it is you did! I swear it!"_

"_It's o- okay, Usagi Love. Th- they didn't do this." _Harry couldn't raise his head to acknowledge the cool tingle of Usagi's fingers caressing his skin.

"_Let's get you to bed, Harry. I'll tell you how much better Cuteness is on a broom. You would be so proud of her, Harry. So very proud of our little girl." _As Harry began to turn towards the door, Usagi looked back at Albus and Minerva. "Meeting over, yes?"

They both nodded. Her face made it clear that it wasn't really a question.

* * *

September 6th, 1996

Nabiki Tendo couldn't stop looking over her shoulder. It didn't matter that she never saw Sailor Pluto any of the last sixty or so times that she looked for the Senshi.

Surely the green haired mahou shoujo would reinforce her first and only warning, right? Especially after the little talk Nabiki just had with 'Cuteness'.

Nabiki had been watching the park every day in between other appointments and whenever she wasn't in the office, just hoping to see the girl tempt fate again. Today, the little witch did exactly that.

Nabiki decided to write down her notes on the encounter without risking the loss of more electronics. Those things were expensive and the green haired Senshi wasn't offering to replace anything she broke.

As a waitress set down Nabiki's tea, she began to sketch out her recent discoveries.

_1. Witches don't need picnic baskets. 'Cuteness' pulled her hot soup, rice bowl, juice and cool dessert pie out of a cloth bag. Same for all blankets, silverware and plates/bowls._

Nabiki had to stop herself from writing several pages of notes on what that implies magic is capable of.

_2. Cuteness laughed at the idea of being Heather Snape's sister. Does she know about Jusenkyo?_

_3. Cuteness is the girl Heather caught at Tokyo Tower._

Nabiki had to comfort the girl a little bit after that question. She almost bolted until Nabiki distracted her with a story about being saved from becoming dragon food by 'that fashion ignorant boy I told you about last time'. Granted it was her sister Akane who almost became dragon food, but it was a good story and the young witch calmed down.

_4. Cuteness looked like she could be related to Heather Snape._

A nagging thought in the back of her head kept reminding her that the girl also looked like Miss Tsukino who Snape claimed not to be... but there was Jusenkyo to consider.

_5. Did Usagi Tsukino drown in Jusenkyo? _

Wait wait wait. On the 18th, when Bandai had the big Heather Snape opening, Pluto (there she is again) told everyone that Heather fell in the same enchanted pool as Sailor Moon did.

_6. When was the last known appearance of Sailor Moon?_

_7. How about Usagi Tsukino? Compare to Sailor Moon._

Nabiki had some research to do.

Family resemblance... this little pink haired witch could be related to the girl that drowned in the well; she was saved by Heather Snape... and... and... and Sailor Chibi Moon rode with Teen Witch at the Bandai thing... and she's a little girl with pink hair.

Nabiki looked around the restaurant she was in. No green haired Senshi were hiding in corners as far as she could tell.

* * *

September 7th, 1996

_~Boring! Boring, boring and... wait for it... boring. Was he trying to teach you something in there, Harry?~_

_~He probably was, but with the way he is we won't see what it is until it's too late to be useful.~_

Usagi hopped back out of Harry's head as she passed down a corridor between the Headmaster's Office and Gryffindor Tower.

"_That old shack was super gross! And nailing snakes to the door? Disgusting. I would have thrown up if I weren't hiding in your head." _ Usagi was not impressed with this old man's teaching ability. Luna (the cat, not the human) was direct and to the point even if she didn't have opposeable thumbs.

"_Thank you, Love, for not throwing up in my head. That would be hard to clean up." _ The blonde continued to pass through corridors, idly noting that some students still gaped at her passing as though completely unable to deal with a variable-gender Chosen One. "There was one thing in there that I can use when our dear Minister of magic decides to show up again. Tom Riddle."

"_What about him?" _Usagi was still too new to this to catch every puzzle piece. She'd support her Harry in any way she could, just the same.

"_I'm going on record with proof that Dark Lord Voldemort is a half-blood, not a pureblood as everyone thinks he is." _Harry had a smirk on her face.

"_What does that matter?"_

"_It's what most people think this war is about, Love. The Death Eaters want purebloods to rule the world and having a half-blood as their lord and master is going to be a major scandal. If nothing else, it'll piss him off like never before."_ Sure, Voldemort might get a bit more stabby, but then the bastard might just come to Hogwarts directly if he gets an open taunt.

Harry would rather force the issue than drag this war out. Love, Senshi powers or Jusenkyo... any one of those could qualify as 'the power he knows not'. At this point, the longer Moldiewart has to research, the less he'll 'know not'.

It's not like the classes at Hogwarts are going to teach Harry anything that Voldemort doesn't know, right? Harry's best chance to win will come from outside of schoolbooks. If straight school learning was going to be the deciding factor, then Hermione would be the Chosen One, not Harry.

* * *

Sept. 8th, 1996

"Okay! Everyone's here, so let's gather 'round." The first Dumbledore's Army meeting of the new year was about to begin. Nearly thirty students from three different houses collected around Harry.

Both Usagi and Myrtle were floating around near the back of the room. While Usagi's reason was self-evident, Myrtle was a surprise.

Colin Creevey had, after getting Harry's permission, brought her to the meeting as a date of sorts. Apparently the boy was enough of a fantasy/sci-fi fan that the idea of dating a real ghost appealed to him. The first time Colin ever felt funny 'down there' happened when he was watching that scene in Ghostbusters where Dr. Stantz has his ghost blowjob dream. This could work very, very well for Colin.

"Welcome one and all to the second year of our defense club."

Harry had to wait a moment for the surprisingly loud applause to come back down to manageable levels. Soon enough, everyone settled back down. Harry's blush went subsided shortly afterwards, though he didn't lose the grin or the confidence that everyone's applause gave him.

"We have several issues to deal with. First and foremost is the official decision to keep going or disband."

There were a lot of shouts to keep going. No one seemed to offer a dissenting opinion, either.

"Well, I guess we don't need an open vote on that issue then." A few laughs and giggles filtered through the group. "If there is someone here who does not wish to continue, then please say so. You can tell me or Hermione at any time and we won't think less of you."

Harry waited a moment to let what's been said to settle in their minds before nodding to Hermione, who had the D.A. Contract in her hand.

"Everyone in this room signed the contract I hold in my hands... well, everyone that's alive and in this room anyway." Several in the group glanced over two the two ghosts.

"Don't look at me like that. If you want my loyalty, just make sure my Romeo keeps me happy!" Myrtle's inflection told everyone it was a joke, but that didn't stop Colin from getting a nudge, nudge and a wink, wink or two. The two ghosts giggled madly as the poor Gryffindor blushed Weasely red.

Hermione got everyone's attention back. "If you know of anyone trustworthy, someone you think would be a good addition to our group, send them to me or to Harry. If we approve of them, then they'll have to sign on just like everyone else."

"Before we start practicing spells this year, we need to agree as a group what the D.A.'s goal is this year. We started the group because of Umbridge, and thank God we did, but this year is different. This year Snape is teaching defense." Harry stopped when there was a little grumbling, but Snape's position was nothing that any of them could change. "While he is a greasy git if ever there was one, I was quite surprised by by my first class. I actually learned something."

"Malfoy almost killed me, Harry!" Lavender hadn't forgotten Draco's hex or Harry's quick thinking to shield her. If she ever got Harry alone...

"As bad as this is going to sound... that's the kind of class we need right now." Everyone was quiet. They wanted to hear why. "In all of my time at Hogwarts, only Professor Lupin actually taught anything worthwhile in the DADA class. That means that we are all well behind where we should be. Snape may be a evil bastard, but that class was important. Malfoy cheated in class the same way Death Eaters cheat outside of the castle. If you don't learn how to deal with Malfoy Junior and his lot, then you'll never stand a chance against real Death Eaters.

"As anyone who went to the Department of Mysteries can tell you, Stupefy is a dueling charm. Dark wizards don't duel, they fight. We need to fight back. I'm not saying that we are going to cast blasting hexes at each other in the club, but I want to be sure that all of you know how to cast one. I want you to get faster and learn to hit targets from further away. I want you to learn that there are curses that you can't shield against, so dodging will be important... using accio to pull things into the line of the curse also works as long as what you summon is big enough.

"Most importantly, dark wizards tend to ambush you. If you can't apparate yet, try to learn. Death Eaters won't care if it's illegal for you to learn. _Everything_ they do is illegal. If you get into trouble with the Ministry then I swear I will flatter or bribe Minister Scrimgeour until he sets you free."

"You can do that?"

"Yes, I can." Zacharias Smith finally found something to admire Harry Potter for. Political power was something he could respect.

"Back to the ambush thing. Even if you do know how to apparate, wards can block apparition. That's why I bought each and every one of you presents this summer." Harry nodded at Ron.

Presents! Despite the serious nature of the meeting, several members (girls mostly) got a bit more exited.

While the regular D.A. girls were thinking 'shiny', Ron pulled out his miniature Nimbus Two-thousand. A quick tap of the wand brought it to full size. He quickly hopped on and did a quick circuit around the room, landed, re-shrunk his broom and put it back in his pocket.

"As Ron has just demonstrated, you all now own emergency brooms. If you ever feel like you're in a trap, get out of it. Gryffindor courage does not mean that you fight Death Eaters when you're outnumbered or they are more skilled than you are." Hermione began passing brooms out to everyone else. "The only thing I ask is that you keep them hidden on your person at all times, even in the school, because you never know when you will need them."

After everyone got a broom and a lesson on how to expand and shrink them, Harry moved on. He held up a hand to show his rings to anyone who may not have seen them yet.

"You might be wondering why I'm wearing jewelry this year. Simply put, it is enchanted jewelry and it is all defensive in nature. A friend of mine bought a large collection of defense trinkets for me this summer and now you all get to benefit from it." Harry pulled a cover off of a nearby table. Ohhhhh, shiny! "I've got enough here for each of you to get one piece with a few left over. There's a bit of a variety up there, so please read the descriptions before walking off with one."

Five minutes later, Hermione had to make the other girls stop using the Callipygian Venus charm bracelets. Those things were bloody dangerous in a room full of teenaged boys. It took Harry ten minutes to recover enough to get everyone trading schedules and coming up with training ideas.

Usagi stopped gossiping with Myrtle long enough to watch Harry get into a discussion about the morals of hexing with lethal intent versus stunning all of your enemies with some of the students she hadn't been introduced to yet. His closer friends, the ones from the Department of Mysteries Battle, were backing Harry one hundred percent.

As the ghost princess watched her Love lead the defense club, she noted with pride that the others trusted him and followed willingly.

If Usagi were an Evil Super-genius, she would be using her 'mua-ha-ha' laugh right about now.

**Chapter End**

Review notes at end of Omake

**Omake**

**A Spanking! A Spanking!**

Mid-September, 1996

Dinner in the Great Hall was a time for food and companionship. It was also a time for many to relax and unwind at the end of a day, though many others had research or homework to do. Rare was the post owl who made an evening run and rarer still were guests.

"I'm here to deliver punishment."

It took a moment for that line to really sink in. Harry recognized the voice immediately, as did a ghost and two witches in his immediate vicinity. When others turned to see who had spoken up behind their Chosen One, they gaped in awe.

This reaction, being unusual even for Hogwarts, caught the attention of any student who saw their friends look up. When those students looked to see what caused such a reaction, they were caught in turn by the one thing that could outshine a sex changing Boy-Who-Lived.

Within seconds, the Senshi of Pluto held the attention of everyone in the hall save Harry. He already knew how scorchingly hot she was.

"And who, Pluto, are you here to punish?" Harry didn't remember anything particularly bad. He hadn't forgotten Usagi's birthday as that was in mid summer...

"Ginny, Harry. She earned a punishment on the train if I recall correctly."

The redhead in question cursed under her breath. Still, maybe it wouldn't be so bad... Pluto showed up alone and-

Two more Senshi stepped out of the open doorway behind Gryffindor Table. Ginny may not have seen the girls in uniform before, but she had been told who was who and knew the Hair-color Rule. Neptune and Uranus. The lipstick lesbian and her dyke lover. Ginny cursed a little louder this time, just loud enough to get the attention of the two she wanted to avoid most.

"You hold down. Her ass is mine." The teal haired Senshi spoke, but it was the blonde's leer that made Ginny feel dirty.

Ginny refused to go down without a fight. As soon as the slender redhead was clear of Gryffindor table she threw a pair of hexes at Uranus and Neptune before running for the door. While those hexes would have laid low most of the school population, the Outer Senshi were true veterans and dodged her spells with ease.

The chase had begun.

"Mister Potter. I'm afraid that these women have no authority to punish my students." Albus didn't wish to antagonize the Senshi, but he was the Headmaster and had to maintain discipline as part of his position.

"As Professor Slughorn can attest to, Ginevra did volunteer to be spanked on the Hogwarts Express." A quick look over to the Professor in question got a hesitant nod in reply. Fair enough.

"In this case-" But Albus was interrupted.

"A spanking! A Spanking! Oh, yes. Ever since cousin Zoot wrote to me about punishments in Castle Anthrax, I've been waiting patiently for my turn to be spanked. I want to be punished now!" Luna had hopped onto the Ravenclaw bench where she was sitting before and was now humming with excitement. Literally humming.

Harry looked to the Headmaster. Albus was thankful for Harry's small deference and chose to address the excitable Ravenclaw.

"My dear Miss Lovegood, you have done nothing wrong. What are our guests supposed to spank you _for_?" Albus asked in an amused tone.

Without pause, Luna grabbed the fourth year Ravenclaw sitting next to her by the back of his head and slammed his face into a plate of spaghetti he had been working on tonight. As her fellow Ravenclaws looked on in shock, Luna switched her hand with her knee, adding enough weight to keep him down. Luna was staring between Harry and Sailor Pluto from start to finish.

"How 'bout now?" While most of her fellow Ravenclaws were either gaping in shock or grumbling about revenge, the rest of the student body was laughing or applauding Luna's display. Albus and Harry exchanged a glance before the Headmaster returned to the eccentric blonde.

"Very well. Twenty points from your house... and... a spanking." The Headmasters proclamation received almost as much applause as Luna's dirty deed. Maybe they all thought they would get to watch?

Luna walked over Ravenclaw Table and then stepped on the bench between Dean and Colin at Gryffindor's Table. Crossing directly in front of the green haired Senshi saved her the time and effort of walking the long way around. As Luna and Pluto engaged in a quick but brutal eye-sparkle war, the blonde held her arms before her crossed at the wrists.

"_I'm a naughty girl and I need a firm hand... maybe two." _Pluto responded by glancing out towards the entrance doors to their side.

Before Luna could follow her gaze, a thin, glowing gold chain shot through the doors and whipped around Luna's wrists several times. A second later, Sailor Venus followed the end of her Love Me Chain into the Great Hall. A few of loops of magical chain were coiled around the blonde Senshi's neck and she was twirling the other end of the chain in her left hand.

Just as the student population was beginning to embrace the pervy potential another Senshi stepped through the door. The leggy brunette in green held out her right hand, fingers splayed apart, and drew attention to herself by allowing miniature lighting arcs to dance from fingertip to fingertip. Jupiter had come to play.

Luna looked like she'd won the lottery.

As Miss Lovegood was pulled out of the Great Hall by two very hot mahou shoujo, she repeated her exceitement about receiving a spanking several times until her last five words of the evening floated through old oak doors.

"... a spanking, a spanking... … and then the oral sex!"

End Omake

Reviewers:

**deitarion/SSokolow –** I don't believe I'll ever take the prize for perfect grammar. Hopefully I do well enough for the mistakes to be ignored. I'm glad you like it and I will try to keep things interesting. I hate when other authors sacrifice whole chapters to boring crap that really doesn't help the story along. Surely if they try hard enough, they will find a way to get the background details in without messing up the story's flow.

**Fire From Above –** I hope you mean Albus and Severus. I'm trying to let the others grow up as they would naturally without redefining them too quickly.

**phoenix rampant –** If Luna ever gets her own dirty scene, I'll give her the whole amusement park rather than one ride.

**nxkris –** On one hand, the curse won't allow you to hide it forever as Ranma learns quickly in that original story. On the other hand, I want my hero or heroine to be capable of making mistakes. That's why even with access to Senshi powers, Harry still comes close to losing a few times.

**Firehedgehog –** I don't think the prank would allow more Potters to be made by the imitation-Harry's. That's not to say someone may have tried that. If I were going to expand that scene, it would involve Romilda Vane somehow.

**uo-chou –** While I won't say exactly when she get's her body back, there has been some foreshadowing in the right direction. This will not be a 'she comes back only in the very last scene' thing.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** Snape may be Snape Light now, but dunderheads are still dunderheads.

**mikek3332002 – **By the end of Girl Who Loved, I was surprised too. No one want's to fail, but I never considered myself as having any writing ability before.

**Kodachi –** Kodachi.... I've completely ignored the Kuno family now, haven't I? Hmmmm... maybe an omake where the full Nerima Wrecking Crew and all of the Senshi get their violence on inside of Hogwarts. Magical England would never survive. It'll be bad enough when Ranma and Shampoo say hi.

**delta waves –** No problem. In order to keep this shit straight I have to constantly re-read my own story to remember the little details.


	3. Lulu's Crusty Dragons

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Three: Lulu's Crusty Dragons**

September 14th, 1996

"...and I still say that Hermione should have tried out for the team." Ron called out roughly as he and several familiar faces passed through cold stone corridors on their way to Gryffindor Tower.

Ron was as serious as he ever got about anything. When it comes to ensuring that Gryffindor has the best possible chances at winning the Quidditch Cup at the end of the year, no stone must be left un-levitated.

"But I don't want to play, Ron." It was simple logic, really. "I may be a better flier now, but I'm still not chaser material. You have to want to fly... you have to want to play the game. I'd rather watch the game from the stands, thank you very much."

"Give up mate, you can't win this one." Harry was, as usual, caught between two sides in that never ending struggle between his two closest and oldest friends.

If he thought it would do any good, Harry would point out that Ron should be happy that he and Ginny both made the cut today. McLaggen almost took the keeper spot from Ron near the end and Ron didn't do himself any favors with his little problem either.

Harry would make it his first goal as captain to find a way to keep Ron focused before the boy exploded in mid air do to sheer nerves.

Harry briefly let himself get distracted with memories of how Usagi deals with Harry's nerves. Hell yes, a girl can give a bloke something worth fighting for. That's what they always say, isn't it?

Harry had another lumos moment. He could fix this.

* * *

"Lavender? Can I talk to you for a minute?" Harry walked up to Lavender and Parvati in the Common Room during an off time.

The gossip queens did much of their business in the Common Room or the Great Hall, so Harry didn't have to search far to find his target today. As soon as he began speaking behind her, Lavender's eyes went wide and her mouth opened a bit. Parvati, who had seen their sexy and famous team captain nervously walk over to them gave her friend a saucy wink and began to walk away.

"You don't have to leave on my account, Parvati. It's team business actually." Harry should have thought of addressing the both of them, but it really didn't seem to be important.

"If you want Lavender, then who am I to get in your way? Don't worry, Harry. I suddenly remembered that Susan and Hannah promised a really juicy story that I haven't heard yet. I'll just go chat up some Hufflepuffs for a bit while you have your wicked way with Lav-Lav." She grinned wickedly when Harry's face began to burn up in embarrassment. "Oh, and Harry? Don't be gentle. She likes it rough!"

"It's not like that! Really." Harry calmed down for a few seconds before turning back to the one girl that could really help him with his problem. That did sound bad, didn't it? Focus.

"Right... Lavender." Harry decided to just start over again.

"Team business then? Need help... griping your shaft... or something?" Lavender was blushing furiously, but she was smiling through it all.

"What? No! No, no, no... nothing like that. Or well, but it sort of... but I'm not asking you to and it's not for me... bugger." Harry held a hand up to his head. This wasn't going according to plan. Of course, he would have needed a plan for it to go according to plan, wouldn't he?

"You're not trying to set me up with Nearly Headless Nick or something? Everyone knows what you did for Myrtle. Her moans are entirely different from what they used to be, you know."

"Oh, dear God... anyway, while am trying to set up a romance, it doesn't have to be you and it's not for me or for a ghost." Lavender's smile hadn't left, but for once she didn't have a comeback ready. "As you may have heard, Ron is our new keeper..."

"Yes, that news traveled fast. I think that the snakes are already planning something to do with that." Really? Harry didn't expect anything of the sort.

"Well, Ron needs something to focus on during the game so whatever it is that the snakes pull doesn't work. As he is currently single, I was hoping you might be able to suggest a good match for him. You know... a girl that already likes him or could... you know... give him something to focus on. A kiss to the victor and all that." He really should have written something down first. Harry didn't feel like he was doing anything other than making an ass of himself.

"So you _are_ expanding your pimp services then? Asking me to help you run things?" She gave him a little wink.

"I prefer to call it a matchmaking service. That's much more respectable sounding and no one's getting paid for it anyway. Are you interested? I got lucky with Colin and Myrtle and I know you know all there is to know about who likes who and who lusts after who and all of that." Harry didn't want to have to get on his knees, but he also didn't want Ron to freeze up in front of the whole school.

Lavender held her smile for a minute. She liked seeing Harry desperate. After she judged him to be suitably unhinged, she stepped into his personal space and started tracing circles on his chest with a finger.

"Well... there is something you can help me with. I have needs too, Harry, and there's an itch I just can't scratch without your help."

Harry's pulse raced at that... what in Merlin's name had he gotten himself into? "Tell me what it is. If it's at all reasonable, you'll get it."

An hour later, Harry emerged from the Fat Lady's portrait flushed and breathing funny. Hopefully he could calm down before reaching the Great Hall.

Behind him, in the Common Room, Lavender was still chatting a mile a minute with Usagi about her life, her afterlife and how Harry changed everything. The two girls had finally allowed Harry the chance to get some food, but Lavender was not about to leave such a goldmine as the Crown Princess. The ghost was blasting away in Japanese overdrive, overjoyed at the chance to chatter with a professional gossip of Lavender's caliber. Lav-Lav securing Harry's translation ring for the evening helped tremendously. This was almost better than sex!

For Harry, that little interview was about as bad as having Usagi and Luna double-team him in the hall that first night back at Hogwarts.

* * *

September 16th, 1996

"Haaaaaaa-ryyyyyyyyyyy… Haaaaaaa-ryyyyyyyyyyy… Wakey wakeyyyyyy." Usagi floated gently over her living lover and softly sing-songed a wake-up alarm.

It wouldn't be any fun if her first attempt worked. Her dubiously innocent smile brightened a little. For a minute or two, Usagi just watched Harry sleeping on his side. Were she flesh and blood, she likely wouldn't be able to hold still just inches away from the boy who had claimed her heart. As Usagi was dead, well, the dead are known for being patient. How else could Myrtle have stuck mainly to the girls' loo for fifty years straight?

"Moshi-moshi, Harry-kun." To be fair, she called out once in a regular conversational tone.

Harry rolled onto his back. He was clearly still out cold… except for Harry Junior, anyway. Usagi's mind went into full perv mode and she prepared to give Harry his real wake-up call. Carefully, the ghost repositioned herself directly above Harry. She maneuvered her arms and legs to match his as best she could given their size differences before initiating her final countdown.

"San – Ni – Ichi – "

At two, Usagi focused on her love for Harry. At one, she added a healthy dose of lust to the mix. At the zero mark, the playful spirit acted on her plan to become the most bestest alarm ever and dropped like a stone.

Harry was ripped out of dreamland with a powerful shock to the system. He jerked and twitched for a few seconds as though touched by an exposed power cable. Seconds later, Harry settled back down, opened his eyes and took stock of his situation.

Heart: Racing. Morning wood: Flagging. Boxers: Sticky up front.

"Must have been one hell of a dream… why can't I remember the good ones?" Harry's musings were interrupted by the light giggling and the return of a now familiar sensation.

Usagi rose through Harry's chest and adopted a position straddling his waist. Her shit eating grin was clue enough to how he woke up… and how his boxers were soiled.

"You are awake, my Harry?" She tried to stop grinning, but couldn't. It was good for her, too.

"Thank you for an excellent wake-up call, Love. Was there a reason for that?" Harry stretched in place. His movements caused both boy and ghost to overlap each other lightly. As small waves of cool tingly fun passed between the two, Harry Junior began to stand up again.

"Wellllllll… Today is hearing day. Usagi want -- I wanted you to be relaxed in front of old men and Minister." Usagi's eyebrows rose when she noticed something stirring behind her. "Oh! You are dirty, Harry! Want to poke Usagi's bottom!"

The girl giggled and rose into the air above him. "I saving that fun for our honeymoon!"

With one last wave, Usagi disappeared.

Did she just promise him buttsex when they were married? Harry's mind shut down for a moment as old fantasies were discarded to make room for newer and dirtier scenarios.

He briefly wondered where she would go, but wasn't really bothered. The girl was actually collecting a lot of friends in the castle, ones he doesn't usually associate with, even students outside of the D.A.

By the time Harry was done with his first class of the day, the boy was almost willing to thank Professor Snape. The dour man had kept such a brutal pace going that Harry had no time to consider the Wizengamot meeting which would determine his Magical Guardian. Hermione was too tired to comment on the dozens of spells that they were now required to write essays on for next class and Ron's silence was due to his being picked to fight three times in a single class period.

To add to the difficulty, fights are now conducted to prove specific points by Snape. Draco roughed up Hermione during one such fight. The lesson? Book smarts don't trump dirty cheating to make an opponent suffer. To be fair, Snape called the end of the match before Draco could delve into real dark magic. The next fight? Harry and Draco. The lesson that time? What the drive for revenge will do to you. Nasty business that; Harry got inside Draco's guard and beat him savagely. Snape's lecture, after making Harry heal the Slytherin floor stain, was about how open and vulnerable Harry was while beating Draco senseless. The Chosen Dunderhead even dropped his wand to have both fists available... such narrow focus has been the end of many a wizard in the past.

Now that class was over and most of his classmates were heading off to lunch, he had no such distractions. With any luck-

"Harry!" Brilliant, Usagi was back from... wherever it is she goes when Harry's in class. She spent one class in his head before giving that up as terribly boring. Hasn't tried again since.

"_And what was your morning like, Love?"_ Harry knew Usagi was learning English quickly now that she split her time evenly between Hogwarts and Tokyo, but he still liked speaking Japanese. One day he would learn the language properly, but until then the ring certainly helped.

Usagi floated up for a soft peck on the lips before matching his pace on the way to the Headmaster's Office.

"_Luna's class started a new Herbology project today. Bonsai trees! Did you know that they could help scare away nargles if you kept them properly shaped?" _ Nargles. Harry smiled. Maybe they were real after all considering Luna's rather unique gift... _"Sooooo. Do I get to come with you?"_

"_Of course! I may have to sneak you in... don't know if they have a 'no ghosts' policy or anything." _ Usagi smiled and vanished from sight. A moment later, he could feel the slight tingling caused by her getting comfortable in his head.

Soon enough, the boy with a voice in his head that wasn't his own found himself in front of a gargoyle guardian and only one spiral stair from his escort to the Ministry today.

"Nerds." Not quite 'open sesame' but it worked.

Harry's trip up the spiral staircase ended, as usual, with the Headmaster calling through the door before Harry could even knock. Harry opened the door and proceeded in. He felt no need to look around himself as his last visit inside this room was an unpleasant affair. Headmaster Dumbledore similarly felt no need to address his student as he was rather focused on setting his thoughts to parchment at the moment.

_~Hey! It's that bird!~ _ Usagi saw Fawkes sitting on his perch as Harry stepped over to Headmaster Dumbledore's desk.

_~Fawkes was at the shrine, that's right. He's a phoenix, which is why he could catch a Senshi attack for the Headmaster and come back for more. It really did kill him but Fawkes was reborn.~ _Harry paused for a moment to consider Usagi's past. _~Do you have any Phoenix ancestry or something? When you 'come back', is there any burning involved?~_

_~Nope. Sorry, my Lunar Senshi magic just doesn't work that way.~_

Another half minute or so passed silently with Harry, and Usagi, watching Fawkes clean himself as the Headmaster finished whatever it is he was doing. After two or three minutes, Albus held up a finger on his left hand.

"Almost there... and... done." Albus set down his quill and looked up. "Sorry to keep you waiting, Mister Potter, but my duties as Headmaster cannot be set aside easily."

After drying the parchment magically, Albus placed it into a pre-addressed envelope, sealed it and held the finished letter above his shoulder. Without words from the Headmaster or a chirp from his familiar, Fawkes jumped away from his perch and swooped down onto the letter. As soon as Fawkes had it securely in his claws, the phoenix flashed away.

If Usagi had been in control of Harry's body at the time, she would have whistled and clapped at the free show.

"Ready, Mister Potter?" Harry nodded. This had been set up earlier in the week. The two of them would floo directly to the Ministry together. Harry would, most likely, have a bit of a wait as the Wizengamot had many issues to deal with and his Guardianship was not the most important issue to be dealt with today even if it would be the best gossip tidbit.

"Your destination is 'Ministry of Magic Atrium'. As always, be clear in calling out your destination as there are a lot of less savory destinations in the network which are meant to trap the unwitting. I believe that at least a dozen good wizards and witches have found themselves the victim of Death Eater ambushes simply due to their accent." The Headmaster seemed to frown for a moment before continuing. "Perhaps I shall have to be more forceful about the issue... the employees in Magical Transportation keep pointing out that the floo addresses were obtained legally and paid for in full."

"Perhaps, Sir, we should complain at how efficiently the Ministry is running, just this once? If only the aurors could claim to be so successful at their jobs." Harry wanted to smile, but remembered his own floo mix-up and his unplanned trip to Knockturn Alley. If Death Eaters had been actively waiting for people to stumble out of that floo way back when, well... he didn't like his chances of escaping a trap back then.

The two made their way through the floo system with Harry once again cursing the unpleasantness of magical transport. Were it up to him, he would go everywhere on his Firebolt. Perhaps once he was legal to cast magic outside of school, he'd do exactly that.

Harry was unceremoniously tossed out of the Ministry fireplace, as usual, and given a hand up by his amused Headmaster.

_~Oh, that was horrible! I would totally have thrown up if I could. I'll take a Sailor Teleport over that any day.~_

_~Thank you again for not throwing up in my head, Love. I really appreciate your restraint.~_

"Mister Potter. I believe that you are having a spot of trouble with the floo system. Have you ever considered what sort of problem you may have?" His eyes were sparkling again. He must already know the answer.

"I always thought that the floo just hated me or that I missed a lesson that everyone else attended."

The two were getting stared at. Oh sure, it still happened in Hogwarts, but that was fading as it did every year that didn't involve giant snakes or tournaments.

This was the kind of staring that people who almost never get to see Albus 'Leader of the Light' Dumbledore and Harry 'He Who Has Too Many Aliases To Bother With Them All' Potter both walking through the halls of the Ministry of Magic. After several uncomfortable minutes of such gawking, the Headmaster reached a door that Harry didn't recognize.

"This is where we part ways, Mister Potter. You may sit and relax in this ante-chamber until you are called for." Albus opened the door to see a room that Harry did in fact recognize. This was the same room that he and Usagi spoke to Minister Scrimgeour in before. "I fear that I may be required to continue my duties until well after you are safely dealt with. Therefore-"

Two Wizengamot mebers bumped into the Headmaster, taking his attention for a moment. He quickly begged their forgiveness and promised that he would be delighted to catch up in the gallery before the session was officially opened. After a brief yet polite farewell, Albus turned back to Harry.

"Where was I?"

"Therefore... Sir. You were going to tell me what to do after my appearance before the Wizengamot was over." Harry was actually a bit put out when the two pensioners took the Headmaster's attention. Harry hoped that Dumbledore was about to tell him he could make his own way back.

"Yes. Therefore I have ensured that the floo connection in my office will allow you safe return without me. I must ask that you head directly back to Hogwarts without any deviation or hesitation. You are not safe elsewhere."

Harry held back on responding as he wanted to about safety. He suspected that Albus would know his thoughts on that count anyway. "I will do my best, Headmaster. You know what my life is like."

"I do at that." Albus was almost distracted by remembering how much of that was either his fault or something he could have prevented had he been of sound mind. "Please be safe, my boy. We need you."

"I plan to, Headmaster. I have more reasons to be safe now than I ever had before." _~And more reasons to fight as well.~_

_~To win, Love. You have more reasons to win.~_

_~And what do I get if I win?~_

_~Me!~_

_~But I've already got you.~_

_~But not in the way I'm thinking.~_

_~Probably not. You are more of a perv than I am, Buttercup.~_

_~I've been saving people so often in the past that I just want my Dread Pirate Roberts to grab me and-~_

-click-

Harry and Usagi were caught up in their own internal dialogue that they didn't even notice being ushered through the door and left alone.

"We've been here before." Indeed he had. Subjects in three of the paintings smiled and waived in recognition. The subject of one painting seemed excited and ran out of frame.

_~Looks like someone was waiting to hear about us... how much shall we bet on getting a visit from Minister Scrimgeour?~_

_~I won't bet on that, Love.~_

-click-

A door near the other end of the room opened to allow Rufus Scrimgeour entrance.

"Harry! How wonderful to see you again." Minister Scrimgeour walked partway around the central conference table to shake Harry's hand.

"Thank you Minister. I trust you are well, Sir?" Harry shook back, but had to keep from flinching at the Minister's overenthusiastic grip.

"That's Rufus, Harry, and I'm still alive, so it could be worse." Rufus pulled a seat out for Harry at the table and then pulled out the next chair over for himself.

As Harry and the Minister sat down, a tray with several drink options appeared. House elves, no doubt. Rufus poured himself a stiff drink and offered Harry one of the same. Harry politely demurred and chose a butterbeer instead.

"Well, Harry, I'm glad you could make it. Honestly thought you'd be detained by your Headmaster for some reason or another and I was quite ready to send aurors to Hogwarts to fetch you if necessary." Rufus took a drink, grimacing a bit at the strength of it but coming back for more just the same. Of course, with the stress of being a sitting Minister for Magic in a time of open conflict, the man must be under enormous strain.

"Careful, Rufus... that stuff can kill you, or so I'm told." Rufus tried not to snort his scotch. That's not something you want in your nose.

"If that were my only problem. If you were my biggest concern today, then even that would be like dieing and waking up in Avalon compared to what we deal with in the Ministry these days." Rufus put his scotch down and looked Harry in the eye. "I hope you don't mind, but I've got a reporter lined up to talk to you after your part in today's session is over. As you won't be required to stay through the whole meeting, you'll likely be done with your interview before the session comes to a close."

_~Shite. Still, we thought this might happen.~_

_~Yes, we did, my Love. Just remember to say what you believe in and refuse to say anything else.~_

"And what should I expect this reporter to ask about?" Harry kept his question light as not to cause any friction so soon.

Rufus grabbed his drink, slammed back a quarter of what was in the glass and set it back down.

"What I need, most of all right now, Harry, is for the ordinary wizards and witches of England to remain calm. They scare easily-" Harry snorted at this, catching Rufus off guard.

"S-sorry, Sir... I know just what you mean. Really they're a lot like a herd of cattle or sheep or something." The Chamber of Secrets... Goblet of Fire and the Tournament... this Minister was preaching to the choir.

"You do understand... very good, Harry. Very good indeed. A flock of sheep it is then. The Death Eaters are the wolves of course and we... you and I... are the shepherds." Rufus leaned a little closer in Harry's direction. "Right now, I'm tying to keep them from panicking and becoming easy targets. What I'd like from you, Harry, is a little help calming them down. Tell them that we at the Ministry... the shepherds... are doing what is best for them to keep the wolves at bay."

"Are you? Keeping the wolves at bay, that is." Harry would want proof, of course.

Rufus eyed his glass, but left it on the table for now.

"It's touchy Harry. We've got a couple of people detained right now on suspicion of being Death Eaters, but little evidence to put them on trial with. I think you know from personal experience that sending them to Azkaban without a trial is a bad idea." Harry nodded emphatically.

"Right. At the same time, I can't just let them go. The Ministry has to be seen doing something against the threat and until we can prove them innocent or guilty we'll look like fools if we just release them. As for the rest of the Death Eaters, well, they never hang around long enough for our aurors to get to them. People wind up dead or tortured and, other than that damn mark in the sky, there's never a sign of the bastards that done it. Just last week we tried to set up a trap, an ambush of our own. I sent two squads of aurors to the home of a muggleborn and his pureblood wife after we heard rumors of an attack coming. Can you guess what happened?"

Based on his lead-in, Harry thought he'd take a stab at it. "The muggleborn dies anyway?"

"Right in one, Harry. And his wife is missing... wouldn't like to be her right now... **and** we lost five aurors. Five!" Rufus took another big swig of liquid courage. "I think that we were set up that time. Bastards wanted to prove that the aurors should just stay away... and some of the cowards are beginning to do just that."

"I'll do what I can to help my country, of course, but I'd like to make a suggestion or two as to what I can say without just leading our lambs to the slaughter, as it were." Harry and Usagi had been thinking of possible material for an interview ever since Harry returned from this room the first time.

"Let's hear it, then." Harry couldn't tell if Rufus was pleased or not with his response so far.

"Well, it's like I was telling the D.A. last meeting-"

"You're doing your club again, then? Good lad." Harry was beginning to wonder just how much liquid lunch the Minister was having today. Hopefully he could still do his job.

"Thank you, Sir. Well, in the last meeting, I told everyone that you can't expect the Death Eaters to play fair. They like to ambush you and because of that, you always need to have a way to escape. As you say, Rufus, the aurors can't help you if you're dead before they get the alarm."

"I'm listening."

"I'd like to recommend apparation lessons for anyone that doesn't know how... and that anyone that can keep a broom near them should do so. Now, I know that a lot of people freeze up in fear of the Dick Lord and his minions, and that's the biggest problem! Learn to dodge and run instead of freezing up. You can't hide from unforgivables behind a Protego, but you can get out of the way if you're fast enough."

Rufus wanted to laugh at 'Dick Lord' but this was serious stuff. "But they do freeze up, Harry. He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named scares the shite out of just about everyone and his followers are almost as bad."

"I've got a couple of ideas..."

And Harry did have a couple of ideas. Rufus Scrimgeour was impressed. If this kid lived through the war, he was a shoo-in for Minister for Magic one day.

* * *

"... and I hereby declare the Wizengamot session open on this day, the sixteenth of September of the year One thousand nine hundred and ninety-six, Anno Domini. The floor is open to discuss old business." Albus Dumbledore sat down at the end of his initial duties as Chief Warlock.

The assembly of Wizengamot members moved into a string of old issues which had required time before the body of wizards. Two Lords bickered over a centuries old Betrothal Contract. A Lord and one of the few Ladies in attendance presented a new mercantile agreement which would likely be sealed with a new Betrothal Agreement involving young heirs who were probably unaware that their future was being planed by committee. Thirty minutes after the start of the session, Harry Potter's presence was requested in the chambers.

When the Chose One stepped again before them, the Wizengamot took notice that he was alone this time. Harry walked over to a table and chair that were obviously meant for him.

"Please be seated Mister Potter. We will try to make this a quick and painless as possible." Albus gestured to the chair. "We now intend to deal with assigning a Magical Guardian for the few remaining months up to your seventeenth birthday, at which time you will be recognized as an adult in the eyes of the Ministry of Magic. Until that time, you will look to your guardian as a protector and a guide who can point out the wonders, dangers and legal necessities of life in our world.

"In our last session, this guardianship was removed from my person..." Albus's brief pause caused some to tense up in case the Chief Warlock intended to re-apply for guardianship. "...from my person for reasons that, on reflection, were more valid that I cared to admit to at the time."

There were more than a few gasps as Albus effectively admitted his guilt to at least some of Harry's accusations.

"While I am widely acknowledged as the 'Leader of the Light', I find that like many other relics that have been exposed to the elements for well over a hundred years, I had acquired something of a tarnish. Mister Potter, please thank the Crown Princess when next you meet up with her for cleaning that right up with a truly amazing display of White Magic. I'd never thought such a spell could be cast in all of my days as Headmaster of Hogwarts."

The Prophet was going to have a big day tomorrow. Not only would the results of Harry Potter's hearing be revealed, but they would have Albus's admission of guilt plus his thanking the Crown Princess for healing his dark streak. Did that mean she was more powerful than he was? That she was lighter too?

Albus corrected his course before he could move too far afield of their business today.

"I have here before me a list of families that were submitted as willing to assume guardianship of young Lord Harry Potter." Albus looked again over the list and frowned. There were many traditionally neutral families on the list, but all known dark _and_ light families had been booted off by ministry officials for various reasons. The only names that made it on the list were families that both sides thought they had a good chance of influencing.

"Mister Potter. The list I have before me is Ministry approved and no other candidates will be allowed. While the Wizengamot need not appoint the Magical Guardian you request, your opinion will be considered in the process." Albus turned to an attendant. "Scribe. Take this list to Mister Potter."

The scribe, a tallish young man who was _not_ Percy Weasley took the document from the Chief Warlock and dutifully transferred it to Harry.

Harry began to study the parchment in silence. 'Awkward... no hurry then, eh?' There was no response from inside his head either. Harry found himself quite happy that he didn't have Usagi commenting on all of his thoughts when she was hitching a ride. He could be plenty schizophrenic without a ghost stuffed up his nose.

Harry picked up the parchment and looked over the family names. He was at least vaguely familiar with half of them.

Fawcett... Edgecombe...

_Snort ~Not bloody likely.~_

_~What is it, Love?~_

_~The Edgecombes. Marietta was the bint that told Delores Umbridge about our defense club last year. There is no way that I'll stay with her family.~_

Davies... Vane... Vaisey... Greengrass... Zabini...

Harry looked into the gallery. He had been told that at least one member of each family was present to answer questions. One couple had brought a young child. Wait a minute, Harry knew that girl.

_~Harry! It's her! That's the little girl we saved in the alley before putting Hermione's soul back in!~_

The girl in question didn't have any idea that she was the focus of some rather intense starring on the part of the Boy-Who-Lived. There was a bogey in there somewhere and she was determined to get it out. She was, at least, until her mother swatted her bogey free hand away from the Crusty Green Dragon's cave.

The girl was disheartened for a moment and looked down at her shoes; her pretty honey blonde hair blocking a pout from general view. She ignored that gasp escaping from the general audience in favor of focusing how boring her day was... stuck sitting in a stupid chair in a stupid room full of stupid grown-ups doing nothing but talk, talk, talk. As much as she wanted to ignore her Mummy tapping on her shoulder, she knew that a 'proper young lady' was supposed to be on her best behavior in public. She looked up.

She looked up right into the eyes of a young ghost girl with long hair in two tails and right next to the ghost was Harry Potter too! Then the ghost started jabbering away in with words that the little girl never heard before.

"_Ohhhhhhhhh she's so cute! Cute! Cute! Cute! Can I keep her Harry? I'll find her a bed and some books and we'll play dolls together and I'll set up play dates with our daughter and we'll be soooooo happy together!"_ Usagi was acting like she'd found a particularly cute kitten in a box on the street.

Luckily, Harry remembered that this kitten was not a stray. He looked at the rather respectable looking couple who were eyeing the ghost and boy in front of them. The father looked a bit uncomfortable that his girl had become the focus of the entire Wizengamot. The girl's mother seemed more amused... perhaps a little embarrassed too. The Chosen One _had_ just caught the little witch picking bogeys in public.

"Terribly sorry. We don't mean to be a bother, it's just we- my friend recognized your daughter from that unpleasantness in Diagon Alley." Harry bowed slightly to the little girl's parents. Mentally going over the list of families willing to accept guardianship caused Harry to remember a bit of that first Prophet article after his appearance as the 'goddess'. Greengrass.

"You wouldn't happen to be Lord Greengrass, would you, Sir?" Harry addressed the presumed Lord who seemed to be a fairly healthy looking man with honey blonde hair to match his daughter's but with lighter blue eyes.

"I would be at that, Lord Potter. I am Damien Greengrass and this is my wife Melian..." Melian nodded to Harry who nodded back, "and my youngest daughter Luthien." The little girl blushed hard and looked down again.

Lady Greengrass had fair skin and dark brown curly locks, but clearly passed her eyes and delicate features down to her littlest girl.

"Ah... hello! I am Usagi and I am so very happy that we could help Luthien when mazoku attack London." Usagi was quite happy with herself. As Sailor Moon, she rarely got the chance to check up on the people she saved in Tokyo lest her secret be revealed. Here, it didn't matter if the locals knew her name or not as it would never get back to the people of Tokyo. Not from these people, anyway.

"The _what,_ dear? Mazoku?" While the two older Greengrass daughters had followed their father into Slytherin house, Melian was a Ravenclaw and had hopes for her little Luthien to follow in her footsteps. Being a Ravenclaw, of course, meant that dangling an unfamiliar word like 'mazoku' in front of her was like showing a smoker that you have an open pack of fags in hand.

"Hai!" Finding someone with an interest in her birth tongue excited Usagi enough that she slipped a little and went back to Japanese for a second. "Ara... I mean, yes. Mazoku. Is Japanese word for bad spirit or monster. Is called a demon-" She looked back to Harry who only nodded. Usagi's smile doubled in intensity at the positive encouragement. "demon in English."

"The dementors. Right. I'd like to thank you, Miss, and the Moon Princess for saving our Luthien. We were seperated in the initial panic and... and well... I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't saved her for us." Lord Greengrass looked over to Harry.

"Mister Potter. I am offering to become your Magical Guardian as a way of repaying you and your Betrothed for giving back my little Lulu." At this, Damien ran his hand through Luthien's fine curvy hair. "I owe you more than I can ever repay and I am willing to swear a binding oath to see to your best interests for as long as you will allow."

Harry studied the Greengrasses for a moment. They seemed like a nice respectable family at first glance. Luthien, or little Lulu, was an adorable witch. Looking back, Harry couldn't remember any time that the other Greengrass girls currently in Hogwarts had ever participated in any of Draco's schemes. In all honesty, he was having trouble remembering anything at all about the two girls other than the fact that they were both Slytherins.

This whole time, Usagi kept looking at little Lulu who would sneak a peek every few seconds before looking down again when Usagi caught her. Harry decided to make Lulu the real test. If she were a little Pansy Parkinson...

"Miss Luthien? Lulu?" Harry smiled when the girl looked up and blushed. Maybe she was embarrassed or maybe it was the whole Boy-Who-Lived-Chosen-One-Betrothed-of-the-Crown-Princess-of-the-Moon thing again.

"Uh, hi." Lulu's greeting was soft, almost silent. Must not like the attention she's getting. Harry liked her already.

"I'm Harry Potter. Your father has asked me to be a part of your family. What do you think? I wouldn't, like, move into your house or anything, but we could do things together when school's out. I know another girl about your age too. She lives really far away in Japan. I call her Cuteness and she's learning to ride a broom. I could get her to come say hi one day. Would you like that?" The little girl's eyes began to scan the room and she started fidgeting.

"Okay." Was that a hint of a smile? Harry thought that he had learned a thing or two about reading little girls, and Luthien seemed to like the idea. If she were being raised as a Junior Death Eater's Wife, than she probably would have been pouting or scowling.

Harry looked at Usagi, who had finally tore her eyes away from Lulu when she heard Harry asking the girl questions.

"_What do you think? I don't really know any of the others on the list any better than the Greengrasses and there is that offer to take an oath. And Lulu, can't forget about her."_ Harry tilted his head a bit and looked at all of the other people watching the exchange. Headmaster Dumbledore was watching, but showed no indication of whether or not he considered the Greengrasses a good option.

"_I like them, Harry. I think you should accept." _ Usagi liked them all and knew deep down that her opinion would not change. Once she got a feel for someone, she never really changed her opinion of them.

"With your permission, Lord Greengrass, I shall request that you be given guardianship, pending the oath, of course."

"Of course. And I would consider it an honor, should they approve or not, to host you at our manor for tea after the hearing." Damien was smiling now. It was a warm smile that Harry didn't mind returning.

"If it pleases the Wizengamot, I wish to have guardianship given to Lord Greengrass." Harry's declaration caused a bit of a stir as the Greengrass family was known to favor Slytherin House. Still, Lord Greengrass made it to the short list for a reason. He was adept at keeping a neutral stance in this conflict between light and dark. The light siders saw the Greengrass debt to the Goddess of Diagon Alley and believed that Harry would be safe in their hands. The dark families looked at the girl as an excellent trap laid out to collect the Dark Lord's second greatest enemy to date.

The debate lasted another twenty minutes, dragging Usagi and Lulu into the deepest pits of boredom until Usagi started asking Lulu about herself. Lulu found it quite novel to talk to a dead girl, and a Japanese one at that, and proceeded to ask all sorts of questions about what being dead was like. The two girls were thick as thieves by the time Chief Warlock Dumbledore brought down his gavel.

_crack – crack – crack_

"By a clear majority, the vote is in favor of granting Magical Guardianship of Lord Harry James Potter to Lord Damien Emanuel Greengrass. Lords Greengrass and Potter, the proper parchments shall be drafted and presented for your signatures within a week's time." Albus turned and nodded once to Harry. "Lord Potter and those who came today seeking guardianship are dismissed for the day, unless they should wish to witness the rest of today's session. I assure you that, while important, our work is rarely exciting to watch."

A few laughs were heard as Harry and a good portion of the gallery stood to leave. As Harry stepped away from his table, Lulu shot over to him and grabbed his hand.

"Can we go now? I want to have biscuits and milk at home and Mummy says we can't do that until you're ready."

"Can I have some biscuits and milk too?" Lulu nodded quickly at his question. "I have to meet someone first, but after that I can go." Harry looked around. He didn't see anyone who looked like they were a reporter waiting for him.

"If Usagi wanted some ghost biscuits, would you have any?" Luthien looked back at her mother for a moment.

"I don't know... does she really eat ghost biscuits? I've never seen ghost food before."

"Actually, she's quite fond of pizza."

"Pizza? Is that ghost food?"

"You've never had pizza? It's wonderful stuff! As your sort-of brother, it's my duty to see that you learn what pizza tastes like."

Harry smiled at Lulu. Lulu smiled back at Harry.

"So fast." The ghost princess watched a sixteen year old wizard and seven or eight year old witch battle to see who could smile the biggest.

"What was so fast, dear?" Melian was intrigued by the idea of treating a ghost as you would the living. Harry and this Usagi girl were obviously close. Usagi was supposed to be the name of his Betrothed... but that was just plain silly. She had to be another girl with the same name.

"Harry finds sweet girls and opens heart to them. They open heart back. He has collection of girls who love him and he love them all too. Harry has very big heart. That is why I love him." Melian could swear that the ghost was blushing.

Lady Greengrass found herself with so many questions racing through her mind that she could barely keep track of them. Clearly there was more to young Harry and his companion than she had ever imagined and maybe, if she were patient, she would learn the truth of it.

"Before we go, or at least before I go, I've been scheduled for an interview with a Daily Prophet reporter. To be honest, I'm not quite sure who or where to meet, but I doubt Rufus would let me get away so easily." Harry began to look around at who was still left in the gallery. There were some who appeared to be ready to document the rest of the session and Dumbledore who looked ready to take up the gavel again.

"You can stay with me if you want, but I really don't know how long this is going to take." Harry commented as he took Lulu's hand and began to lead her towards the exit doors.

"Lord Potter... Harry, as your Magical Guardian, I would be acting irresponsibly if I left you in a room with a reporter alone. And who might 'Rufus' be?" Damien said with a raised eyebrow.

"Sorry. I should have said Minister Scrimgeour. He and I have had a couple of talks and he asked for me to sit with a reporter after the session. I agreed." Harry noted the older Lord's challenging glance. "We did discuss what the article would be about and it's not going to be a blanket approval of the Ministry. I am willing to answer simple questions on things like this guardianship issue. I will probably dodge most questions about my betrothal but I might be able to say a few things about my summer... really, Rufus seemed to think that the big issue will be what I think about the war." Harry made these comments as Usagi and the Greengrasses followed him through the main doors and into a hallway which eventually lead back to a lower level lobby.

"Excuse me, Mister Potter?" A man who appeared to be in his mid-forties by Harry's estimation had asked the question. He held out his hand. "Arthur Anderson, Daily Prophet. Our mutual friend Rufus asked me to come have a chat with you."

Harry looked at the offered hand, which seemed empty. He chose to nod instead. "I hope you'll forgive me, Mister Anderson, but I've learned to become quite suspicious of people who I haven't met before. At least until I know them enough to risk random portkeys."

"After the Tournament, and if some of the rumors I hear about are true, I certainly don't blame you Mister Potter." Mister Anderson smiled and withdrew his hand.

"Perhaps we can take this to my home? I don't think staying in the public eye too long is safe for Lord Potter." Damien looked to Harry. "After I take the promised oath of course."

* * *

"Daphne? Astoria?" A lot of students in the upper years' end of Slytherin table stopped eating dinner to see a most unusual sight. The two girls in question both stopped eating but seemed to be unwilling to turn around and confirm the identity of the one who just spoke.

"What the bloody hell do you think you're doing Potter! This is the Slytherin Table and as such is far too good for the likes of you." Draco was already palming his wand under the table. He was directly across from the Greengrass sisters and would be hard pressed to miss no matter what hex he cast.

Draco's temper was getting the better of him. Potter had never made the walk to Slytherin House's table in the Great Hall as far as he could remember, not for any reason. Sure, Draco had made the trek to Gryffindor's feed trough quite often, but as a Malfoy it was his right to do as he pleased when he pleased. Potter had no such privileges. Why was Potter over here calling on Slytherin pureblood girls? Without Weasel and the mudblood?

Harry never took his eyes off of the two sisters. He was covered and he knew it.

"Lulu says that it's awfully lonely at home with her two big sisters away at school most of the time and her Daddy doing whatever it is that daddies do all day long." Both sisters looked behind them in surprise. The Gryffindor Golden Boy knew Luthien? "I know that older girls like you don't share the same interests as seven year olds, but Lulu wants to see her sisters next Hogsmeade Weekend and I sort of promised her that the both of you would at least have lunch with her... and maybe buy some chocolates or something. You know how little kids love candies, big kids too I suppose."

"How do you know my sister, Potter?" Daphne wasn't about to raise her wand, but this could be bad for her family.

"If you two lovely ladies would give me just a bit of your time, I'll tell you all about it. If you don't... well... you'll read about it in the Prophet tomorrow along with everyone else. You do want to be prepared, do you not?" Astoria quickly nodded. Harry had already made a scene and promised a bigger one tomorrow whether they agreed or not. Better to be prepared. Daphne hesitated, but nodded just the same. She could always claim blackmail as a defense later.

Draco wasn't about to let any Slytherins willingly grant any request Potter could make. His wand came up. That's as far as Draco got before four hands clamped down on his arms, pinning Draco to the table.

"Vince! Greg! What the hell are you doing? Let me go!" Vince and Greg wouldn't budge. To be fair, they weren't in control of their own actions as Vince was once again sporting a glowing crescent moon on his forehead and Greg... well he didn't have a glowing tattoo because Myrtle was never a mahou shoujo.

"Ladies? I'll be in the hall." Harry turned and stepped away from the upper year students and the unheard of tableau behind him. Every Slytherin who was likely to hex him in the back was either pinned to the table, possessed by a ghost or focused on the confrontation between Draco and his two bodyguards.

"Potter! Ten points from Griffindor for causing a disturbance at my table. Now... I want to know why Mister Crabbe and Mister Goyle are manhandling Mister Malfoy." Severus Snape had come down from his seat at the Staff Table as soon as he saw Harry make his way to the Slytherin upper years. That couldn't end well.

"As the Defense professor and the Head of Slytherin House, you should know better than others the value of having unseen allies. Draco thought I would be exposed and he thought that his own goons would help him send me to the Hospital Wing before you or any another professor intervened. He was wrong." Harry looked away from Professor Snape and back to the three struggling boys. "Usagi? Myrtle? Thank you for your help, but I think the Professor wants his snakes back."

Much to the shock of anyone watching who hadn't heard Harry's words or seen Vincent's glowing moon, the two thugs each had a glowing transparent girl pop out of their backs.

"Reduct-gwaughuagh!" Not a standard curse, but that's what you get when two ghosts pass through Draco intent on messing up his concentration. It worked. By the time Draco's mis-cast spell was released, his wand was pointed into the middle of a roast pork platter which promptly dissolved.

Harry's Body-Bind Curse was not interrupted by spirits or other students and landed squarely on target. Draco froze, face contorted in rage and wand about to cast again.

"Twenty points from Gryffindor for casting magic against another student in the Great Hall! Detention and twenty more points for having your pet ghosts possess other students. You are lucky I don't have you expelled and your minions exorcized." There he goes again... Snape's gone soft over the summer just like Dumbledore. Harry began to wonder just what the healing magic he released did to Snape for him to give up a chance to expel Harry.

"And how many points will you take from Malfoy for interrupting private business between myself and two other students? How about his attempting to cast the Reductor Curse in the Great Hall in the middle of dinner?"

"I saw no such thing." Snape wanted to say otherwise. Really, he did, but he couldn't be seen to go soft if he were going to maintain his spying position. News would get back to the Dark Lord if he changed his ways. Besides, old habits were hard to break.

"Luckily I did." Professor McGonagall had left her seat at the Staff Table to protect the interests of her lions. "Fifty points from Slytherin and a detention for casting and attempting to cast lethal curses at another student. Mister Malfoy. In a moment I will release the Body-Bind. If you do not immediately put away your wand then I will take it from you."

Draco's first act when free was to turn red with anger. He slowly put his wand away and would continue behave as long as the Deputy Headmistress was watching.

From his rather impressive chair at the center of the Staff Table, Albus Dumbledore thought about the drama which had just unfolded. Why had he always held Minerva back before? He knew there was a reason, but he couldn't remember it for the life of him.

"Let's try this again. Daphne, Astoria. Please follow me." Harry turned and left the Great Hall. This time he made it all the way out.

Much to the surprise of both Professors and much of the student population watching their evening entertainment, the Greengrass sisters did exactly that. Usagi followed the sisters and Myrtle headed over to the Gryffindor Table. The formerly sad specter would be the life of Gryffindor's party for hours after she told her boyfriend and his mates about her fun with Malfoy and company.

"This is far enough Potter. What is so important that you would risk our being ostracized from Slytherin House?" Daphne was concerned.

"You may not have known, but I went to the Wizengamot session today." Both witches nodded. It was common gossip. "What isn't commonly known, but will be revealed tomorrow in the morning papers, is that your father became my Magical Guardian."

"What?! But Daddy's been staying on the fence the whole time! Why would he... Lulu. It was because your Moon Princess saved Lulu, wasn't it?" Astoria was near to hyperventilating. Her father had linked them to the Chosen One. They were both Slytherins. This could be very bad.

"Right in one. Your parents couldn't sit the fence in good conscience any longer." Harry tried to look apologetic but just couldn't do it.

"Draco is going to tear us apart tomorrow night." Daphne was the one hyperventilating now.

"Are you Slytherins or not?" Oh, that got the sisters angry. Woah, Daphne was hot when she got all wound up! Better keep that to yourself, Potter. You've got plenty enough girl troubles already.

"What I meant to say was, 'where is your cunning?'. Really, Draco's all ambition but I don't think the boy has an ounce of cunning in him. I really think that he's got more of that Gryffindor recklessness than he'd ever admit to." Daphne and Astoria were listening. They'd come to the same conclusion about Draco a long time ago.

"You want us to act like it's some kind of plan? That we aren't going light by taking you in?"

"Right in one! Now there's Damien's girl... er... sorry, Damien's young lady." He did want to have at least a cordial relationship with these two. Harry got along famously with Lulu and the elder Greengrasses after his interview was concluded. "And I meant what I said about Lulu wanting to see her sisters. Expect to meet your parents and little sister in Hogsmeade next time you go. I'd like to spend time with the little sweetheart myself if you don't mind."

Daphne didn't know what to think. Sure, she loved her sister, but what teenaged wizard in their right mind would want to spend time with Princess Bogeypicker?

"I don't get why you want to go about with Lulu, Potter. Are you some kind of perv or what?"

Fine. In the interest of 'family unity' he could tell these two a little something extra.

"You know how your sister was saved in Diagon Alley of course..."

"Of course. Who doesn't know about your Intended's deeds. I'm thankful, really I am, but to her and not you."

Harry looked around. No paintings were in hearing range and Usagi was watching for eavesdroppers.

"And you know that I'm quite good at impersonating her as well."

"Wait. Don't tell me that you're claiming that you did it? You saved Lulu while running around as a witch?" Astoria was getting back into the conversation. Was that a hint of amusement at the end?

"It's a little known fact that, while Usagi specializes in healing and purification magic, she is completely unable to cast the Patronus. I won't bother getting into why just yet. And who else do you know that can cast a _stag_ patronus? The animal shapes a patronus takes are specific to their caster, you know." Neither sister had a comeback for that.

"Do you two have any idea how hard it is to pick up someone's soul? To pick it up off of the ground, figure out who it is and put it back inside of the right person? Usagi and I didn't even consider the idea that we could put souls back until we saw nine of them floating a few inches above the cobblestones."

"It's her isn't it? The ghost. She's the Princess. I mean, everyone comments on the names, and there are rumors about a talk in the Gryffindor Common Room, but who gets betrothed to a ghost?" Daphne again.

"One of the differences between Japanese mahou shoujo and European witches. Mahou shoujo like her can come back from the dead under the right circumstances. Of course, I'd rather you not go spreading that around." Harry checked Usagi again. They better wrap this up soon or others were sure to interrupt.

"You keep my family safe and we'll keep your secret safe. We'll figure something appropriately evil for our father's scheme to turn you dark or something. I am a lot more cunning that that ponce, thank you, and so is Astoria." With a quick nod, the Greengrass sisters slipped by Harry and disappeared around a corner. A few seconds later, Usagi drifted over to him.

"_They'll be okay, Harry. Still, I can't wait to see everyone's reaction in the morning." _ Usagi liked the older Greengrass girls about as much as she liked their parents and Lulu. She was sure that this would turn out to be a good thing in the long run.

**Chapter End**

Reviewers:

**alienyouthct –** Thank you for liking my kind of humor.

**Isis the Sphinx –** I keep looking for a good excuse for Luna to start singing 'Sit on My Face' but it keeps slipping between my fingers.

**The Fanfic Stealer –** Yes. Luna is the most awesomest girl evar.

**delta waves –** Where do the omakes come from? I am a sick, twisted person. I think that I like skirting the edge of lemon more than the idea of writing one.

**Tombadgerlock –** Thank you and please come again.

**uo-chou –** I have hinted at a timetable for that. As to how many chapters it takes, well it will be a few more at least.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** Mixed tenses... I kind of remember thinking I had a reason to do that, but that doesn't mean the reason was valid.

**Fire From Above –** I really didn't think I could make myself both like and hate Snape at the same time, but I did.

**Firehedgehog –** Thanks. It's fun to do this, and it's important to have fun.

**nxkris –** In Dumbles and Snape, we see the potential outcome of a White Magic Lobotomy. I don't want them to be mindless wussy slaves to Serenity, but I still want the dark taint removed.

**Narsil –** I suppose I am trying to make VIS a bit lighter that GWL, but then it goes well with my overall plot ideas. I prefer a story that starts dark and lightens up before the climax over one that starts light and gets darker. By splitting this epic into two stories you can see the comedy that didn't show up when Harry was still one spell away from getting buttraped by Snape. Or I could be totally full of shit. You decide.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** I will admit to not getting every line the best it could be. As I have noted before, on one of my stories, you should see the crap I delete before you people get a chance to read it.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** In my first 'Usagi comes back to life' scenario, Myrtle accidentally got re-alive-inated at the same time as Usagi, but it's not on the menu for Halloween anymore, so I am still torn as to whether or not Myrtle should still get another chance at life. All of Harry's ghost hoes would leave him and Harry would be stuck with only living hoes. How boring.


	4. Breast Friends Forever

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Four: Breast Friends Forever**

September 17th, 1996

CHOSEN ONE CHOOSES GREEN

By Arthur Anderson

Lord Harry James Potter. The Chosen One. The Boy Who Lived. Betrothed of the Crown Princess of the Moon. And now, ward of Lord Damien Emanuel Greengrass. Not only did Lord Greengrass receive Magical Guardianship of young Lord Potter, but he did so at Harry Potter's personal request. Why would the most well known Gryffindor half-blood in England give control of his life to Slytherin purebloods? Hear the answer in his own words. "Being a Slytherin does not make you evil, nor does being a pureblood. Professor Slughorn, who is as Slytherin as they come, greatly admired my mother when she was a student and she was muggleborn. Two of my best mates in Gryffindor are purebloods."

When I addressed my next question to Lord Potter, he frowned and insisted that I call him Harry for the rest of our time together. Many of you may ask why. I learned during my time with Harry that he is a well grounded young man who was always polite to me and to our hosts despite being the most famous sixteen year old wizard alive. Harry is a far cry from the spoiled child I expected to interview.

And why request Lord Greengrass? As anyone who watched the Wizengamot session can tell you, Harry's ghost companion recognized Luthien Greengrass sitting in the gallery. This eight year old girl was one of the many wizards and witches whose souls were saved by Crown Princess Serenity during her appearance as the Goddess of Diagon Alley. Harry's companion was the same ghost who accompanied the Crown Princess when Luthien was saved and identified Luthien for Harry as soon as she could. Lord Greengrass revealed to me during the interview that the Greengrass family felt indebted to Harry and his Betrothed. Indebted or not, bringing the youngest Greengrass daughter to yesterday's Wizengamot session was a cunning ploy to get Harry's attention and it worked.

But Magical Guardianship is only a small part of Harry's story. With the life he's lived to date, is it any wonder that rumors of a prophecy beg to be confirmed? "Well, I'm not about to tell you what it says, but there is one. Voldemort knows that much already. Besides, prophecies are vague at best. How anyone can plan their future based on one is beyond me." I was shocked that the boy would say the name of He Who Must Not Be Named so casually. Harry maintains that the name is just a name and we should not fear it. More to the point, it's not the Dark Lord's real name!

"Tom Marvolo Riddle. That's the name given him by his mother." And how does the brave young man before me prove his point? A history lesson. Harry stood up from his seat in Greengrass Manor, drew his wand and wrote the above name in mid-air. As Harry began to rearrange letters, he told a most remarkable tale about a former Head Boy who became a Dark Lord. The most shocking part of his story? The boy who changed his name from 'Tom Marvolo Riddle' to 'I am Lord Voldemort' is himself a half-blood. His father was a muggle! As the details are too great in number for this one article to reveal, please read the accompanying story entitled 'Half-blood Dark Lord' for further proof.

Harry admitted that there is a prophecy. What does that mean for the common witch and wizard on the street? "It means nothing to anyone except for Voldemort, or Tom as Headmaster Dumbledore likes to call him." The editorial staff of the Daily Prophet does not encourage any of its readers to address dark lords by their first names. Such an act by anyone other than Albus Dumbledore is likely to be fatal.

Minister for Magic, Rufus Scrimgeour, has gone on record as having Harry's support. Is this true? "Prophecy or no, I'm still a Hogwarts student. It's the Minister and the DMLE that have to deal with dark wizards on a day to day basis. I know everyone wants aurors to protect them but the truth is that aurors need your help too." Please explain. "The terrorists called Death Eaters are using your own laws against you. They have allies in the Wizengamot who pass laws meant to weaken the DMLE. Why is it illegal to check people for the Dark Mark? It should be illegal to hide the –expletive deleted- mark. Regular witches and wizards should demand laws like that one be repealed." Harry was most apologetic when Lady Greengrass admonished him for swearing in her home. This reporter could not be certain by Luthien's reaction as to whether or not the young witch had ever heard that word before. Luthien suggested that she might forget the word Harry said if he bought her a box of chocolates. Surely this girl is destined for Slytherin just like her two older sisters.

Until the laws are changed and you can challenge anyone to bear their arm in the street or to take an oath forswearing the Dark Lord, how can our readers protect themselves? Which hex or shield is the most useful? "It's not about hexes and shields as much as it is about your personal actions. For the most part, if you see a Death Eater then helping your family escape should be your main priority. First thing you should do is remember to dodge whatever spell they throw at you as magical shields don't block unforgivables anyway. If you have your wand in hand, cast spells meant to distract or block your attackers view. Banish large objects at them or summon furniture in front of yourself. Whatever you do should be chosen to keep dark curses from hitting you and yours long enough to apparate, portkey or fly to safety."

It sounds easy when you say it, but then most of us aren't Gryffindors who've already faced a Dark Lord. "You just need to do a bit of practice. Take turns with your friends pretending to attack each other. Make a game of it with smaller children. You know… if they see a green light or hear certain words then they should already know that Mummy wants them to hide quickly and not just stand there where the bad men can see them. You may feel foolish the first time, but you'll learn how to get out of danger."

Death Eaters like to start their attacks by blocking the floo and warding against apparition. Portkeys and brooms cost galleons. "Is an employee in the floo office playing for the wrong team? I hope an auror or three will be stopping by that office soon to investigate. As for portkeys and brooms, well, maybe I can work something out with the Minister. Free portkey in exchange for a sworn oath against Voldemort or something. He might bite if he knows I'll pay for it."

You'll pay for it? "Rich Death Eaters use their family vaults to get what they want. You know what? I'm rich too. I'll buy a portkey or two for every light family in the British Isles if that's what it takes to win this war. Unlike others, I won't ask you about your blood purity before giving out the portkeys either."

Your Betrothed's guards at your first Wizengamot appearance this summer looked quite intimidating. Will they help battle He Who Must Not Be Named? "The Senshi are experienced at battling forces of darkness and will help when they can, but they have their own enemies to counter and can't spend more than a small amount of time here in England. While I encourage asking for help outside of English borders, we really should be asking Europe first. After all, if Voldemort succeeds here, then France would be his next obvious target. That's Grindelwald all over again and nobody wants that."

As a journalist, I can tell you that young Lord Potter sounds like both Minister Scrimgeour and Headmaster Dumbledore when he speaks of light and dark, of justice and evil. He speaks with a maturity that defies his sixteen years of age. Will Harry Potter become the next Leader of the Light once Albus Dumbledore finally steps down? Can we trust anyone else?

For more on the Half-blood Dark Lord see page 3.

For more on the Greengrass Family see page 4.

Hermione scanned the cover of her Daily Prophet looking for other articles which dealt with yesterday's Wizengamot session and found a fair few. Next to her, Ron continued to gaze across the Great Hall looking for any sign that the Greengrass sisters were either about to die or plotting Harry's death.

"They don't look concerned, mate. Nobody's bothered them yet. Are you sure they're on your side?"

"Pretty sure, Ron. Daphne probably mentioned something along the lines of a sneaky attempt to lure me away from the light side with promises of sex and money… that or some kind of portkey trap involving Lulu." Harry went for another piece of toast with jam. Yum.

"Wuwu?" Ron at least tried to say 'Lulu', but his ability to speak and eat at the same time was a hit and miss proposition.

"Lulu. The youngest Greengrass. She was in the alley with 'Mione and Ginny." Harry only had one bite of toast in his mouth, so his answer was clear.

Hermione lost her appetite. She could usually stay busy enough during the day to keep that dark memory away, but there was no hiding this time. A little girl got Kissed just like she did. Oh… oh, that's terrible. Hermione almost put her breakfast back on her plate the hard way.

* * *

October 12th, 1996

Hermione picked up a cup of hot cocoa. Hogsmeade was entirely too cold for butterbeer in her opinion.

A group of close friends had congregated around one of the many tables in the Three Broomsticks sipping on warm drinks and trying to thaw out from the heavy sleet outside. This close group of two wizards and three witches was perhaps one of the most famous cliques to pass through Hogwarts grounds in some time. They who fought against dark wizards and kept company with exotic Asian magical girls were given a wide berth by many other students. Funny, the keystone figure of their group wasn't even at their table. She left not half an hour ago to speak with her new Magical Guardian.

Two tables over, the Greengrass family was having a little reunion.

"…and that's how I'm going to lure the Golden Boy of Gryffindor to his doooooom." Astoria sat back in her chair with a smug grin on her face.

"Oh! I love that one!" Harry moved Lulu around in her lap in order to get a better view of the middle sister. A crystal crescent moon dangled from Harry's neck giving Lulu something to scratch her nose with. "No use of grown-up naughtiness and no sacrificing Lulu. Sneaky. I vote for Astoria's plan. Daphne, you may be a very fine looking witch, but I think I can guarantee you that I won't leave Usagi for any reason."

Daphne pouted a bit and thrust her chest out a little more. "Are you sure about that, Harry?"

"One day I'll prove it to you, but until then I'll have to ask you to keep those things hidden. Honestly, your Mum and Dad are watching." And they were. Melian seemed pleased that her new 'daughter' fit in with 'her' sisters so well. Damien was understandably uncomfortable watching his eldest flirt with another girl who also happened to be a boy.

Harry briefly thought about the ghost sitting, or whatever, all warm and comfy in her head. She wanted Usagi alive, here, sitting in her lap instead of Lulu. Better yet, his lap. She knew Usagi was going to come back... if only she had more of an idea when. Waiting to be with her Love openly was driving Harry nutters. In an effort to distract herself from her problems, Harry began a tickle attack on Lulu. Shrieks of laughter bounced off the walls of the Three Broomsticks until 'Uncle Damien' told his young ward that she would either behave in public or risk being bent over his knee for a spanking… in public.

"Soooo... We've got some new sugar quills, more books... butterbeer. What else do we need to do? It's bloody freezing out there." Ron was miserable. He tried to forget that Harry was obviously having a good time with Slytherins.

"Language! And you're right. It's for the best if we head back up." Hermione checked the Greengrass table.

Harry had her hands together in a pleading gesture before Lord Greengrass and all of the witches gathered were having a giggle fit over some trouble Harry seems to have gotten herself in with her guardian.

"Neville? Can you fetch Harry? I daresay we should be heading back now." Neville nodded to Hermione. No, he's not whipped. Nev was just in a better position to get the Blonde-Who-Lived is all.

Hermione had been looking away from the group all evening without seeing whatever it was she was looking for. As just about everyone at her table was busy checking on Harry or ogling members of the opposite sex through their winter wear, Hermione was left well alone. Whatever it was she had an interest in did not show up during Neville's excursion either, so she resigned herself to returning to Hogwarts disappointed.

"Shall we bet on it, then?" Harry felt like adding a little fun to their walk back up as she retrieved her cloak from a chair back.

"On what, mate?" Ron wouldn't let the fact that he spent his last bronze knut on butterbeer stop him from betting.

Harry looked over to her redheaded companion. "Daphne, Astoria and I will walk a few paces ahead of everyone else. You lot can watch to see if anyone recognizes me on the way up."

"I still think we're more likely to count how many young wizards try to flirt with you, Harry. And five sickles says that two wizards do." The Ravenclaw of their table set the bar.

"Merlin, I hope not. I'll take your bet, Luna. Anyone else?" Harry looked around the table, a pair of long braided blonde tails trailing behind her. Hermione shook her head in disapproval. Not disapproval of the braids, mind you, as they were quite fun to do up by hand. No, she disliked the gambling bit.

"I say no-one says anything." Neville.

"Two figure it out! Five sickles." Ron.

"Two flirts and three witches pull you into some gossip. Five also." Ginny went with the social butterfly angle.

"As my luck is horrible on these things, I say that Draco will hit on me again... but just him." Harry turned and waved to the Slytherins who said their goodbyes to family before joining her. The door outside opened. Cold winds penetrated the warm atmosphere of the Three Broomsticks as a bit of sleet was tracked in by more students.

Whether she planned on making a contest of it or not, Harry was wearing a full winter ensemble with scarf and knit cap which pretty much meant that no-one had ever seen the Chosen Crossdresser quite like this before. Those braids screamed girl. Just as Harry, Daphne and Astoria tried to cross the threshold, the bet received it's first valid event.

"Ravenclaw, right? Why haven't you introduced me to your friend before, Greengrass? I'll be looking for her later." With a wink, Draco Malfoy continued past Harry on his way into the tavern with a handful of other Slytherins.

Harry shivered causing Astoria to pat her arm in sympathy as they continued out. As much as Harry just wanted to tuck her head down and pretend to be invisible, she built up her resolve and maintained the charade as not to kill the bet. One more boy gave her a complement. One pinched her ass. The fearsome Flying Shit-Monkey Hex was demonstrated for all to see. Nine witches asked her to teach that hex to them later. Yes, Ginny was one of them.

Harry breathed out a sigh of relief when they reached the trail-head back to Hogwarts Castle.

Ginny and Luna came even with Harry and the Greengrass sisters. "Well, we were all a bit off with that perv, but I think I should get the pool."

"She was closest Harry." Luna liked walking with Harry like this, arms linked as if they were best friends. Better yet, Harry was neither complaining about being a girl nor about linking arms with Luna. This was the best sleet storm ever.

"Looks that way." They were coming up on some other students. "What's going on there?"

Five girls looked ahead to see a pair of witches about twenty meters away that seemed to be arguing over a package. Before they could get any closer, one of them seemed to come up off of the ground as if being held by invisible hands. Moments later, she screamed like a banshee and began to writhe in pain.

Ron, Neville and Hermione all came up behind Harry's group and eight teens rushed forward to help. The screaming witch's panicking friend began her own screaming and grabbed her friend hoping to pull her down.

As soon as Ginny got a hand on the shrieking girl's ankle, she fell. Now that she wasn't locked in a heavenward scream, Katie Bell's tortured face was clearly visible to everyone.

"Who's got their broom on them?!" Harry needed a plan.

"I do!" Almost everyone shouted together. Only the Slytherins, a screaming Katie and her hysterical friend hadn't responded.

"Ron! Gin! Up to the castle for a Professor!" The two were expanding their brooms almost as quickly as Harry called their names. "Nev! Luna! Eyes open for others up and down the trail. 'Mione? See to the friend, will you?" As Neville and Luna pulled wands out, Hermione knelt down to embrace Katie's friend. Daphne and Astoria both had to shake off their shock at seeing this well disciplined group work together before moving to help Hermione.

"Leanne? Leanne, please... we're going to help her." Hermione did what she could to sooth the girl.

Harry pulled out a magical focus. A crystal one.

_~We don't need to know what's wrong with her, Harry. Use the scepter to cleanse and purify her. Wash the pain away.~_

_~I could use a focus of some sort... don't you have a spell or some words or something for this?~_ Harry was hoping for some kind of control. That full release in Diagon Alley was wicked powerful but left her as weak as a baby afterwards.

_~Well, as a matter of fact, you could try..._

Harry listened to the instructions in her head for a moment. She wanted to get it right the first time. Merlin bless Madam Pomfrey, but she can't compare to the Scepter of Prissiness, not when Katie could die on the way up to the Hospital Wing.

Harry forced down an embarrassed blush that threatened the seriousness of the situation. She began to spin in place with scepter extended to the end of her reach, just as Usagi suggested. Anyone watching would have seen the golden light of a crescent moon once again appear on her forehead.

"MOON HEALING ESCALATION!" After a second full rotation, Harry ended the incantation with the crystal shaft pointing straight into the sky. As magic built and then released from the crystal shaft in Harry's grasp, a smaller build-up and release occurred in her crescent moon pendant. Someone might have noticed were it not for the golden white light surrounding the Gryffindor chaser in a magical cocoon. Immediately, her thrashing and screams trailed off to silence. A few seconds later, the golden light faded and released an unconscious Miss Bell.

"Mister Potter! What is the meaning of this?" Professor McGonagall hopped off of Ginny's broom and assumed control of the situation.

"I healed her, Professor. What it is I healed her of, I couldn't tell you. It was bad, that's for sure."

The Deputy Headmistress began to scan Katie looking for some trace of a curse or potion of some kind. She found nothing.

"Enervate." At the professor's spell, Katie seemed to come to. "Miss Bell. What happened here?"

"I... I don't... I'm not sure Professor. I... it hurt so much. I thought I was going to die! Why did I even take that thing anyway?" Katie began to sob. Her friend Leanne moved from Hermione's care to be Katie's caregiver.

"Why did you have the box?" She looked from Katie up to McGonagall. "Professor, we were arguing over that box on the ground. She was acting funny... not herself and she was taking it up to the castle. I think she might have been under a compulsion or something." Leanne began to add her sobs to Katie's.

Professor McGonagall transfigured two more layers of wrapping around the object in question before picking it up herself.

"Mister Potter, please escort Miss Bell to the Hospital Wing. She appears to be healed, but I want Madam Pomfrey to have a good look at her."

After Harry and company accepted her request, a procession of eight students and one Professor began their trek back to the castle gates where two redheads were waiting for the rest of their group.

"We better part ways now, Harry." Daphne spoke up. "I mean, _Potter_."

Astoria looked around for other witnesses before darting in for a quick Harry hug. "I'll be enacting my wickedly evil plan of doom sometime after Samhain, Harry. You better figure out how spoil my fiendishly clever plot soon!"

"Okay, but I'll probably cower before your awesome majesty at least a little before escaping. I mean, I want Malfoy to be soooo pissed that a younger witch makes for a better arch-nemesis than he does that his head will explode!" Harry continued waving to the two Slytherins as they walked away.

"Did anyone else think that was weird?" Luna asked the silent group.

The rest of the evening would be spent alternately comforting Katie with Leanne and offering ideas as to who gave Katie the package and what she was supposed to do with it. Aside from the obvious thought that maybe the Death Eaters were trying to sneak deadly magical artifacts into the school to kill either Harry or the Headmaster, there was little evidence to point any one way.

Harry even asked Usagi if this was something Pluto might be willing to look into. She, regrettably, didn't think so.

* * *

October 20th, 1996

Tom Riddle, a.k.a. Lord Voldemort or He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named to those who don't want to suffer a painfully slow death, was engrossed in his work. Victim's screams were music to his ears. The poor soul now laid out before the Dark Lord was a man who still wore the Wizengamot robes he'd been abducted in. He was suffering because his family's strict neutral stance wasn't quite what the Dark Lord was looking for in servants. Just as Voldemort was ready to dig deep for a really heartfelt wail, a parchment appeared on the table next to his potions selection.

Either someone was going to be rewarded for good service or they were going to die for interrupting him. Voldemort chose to read the parchment now just in case it was time sensitive.

My Lord,

I have traveled to China in Malfoy's footsteps and made contact with survivors of the magical family that Malfoy and his team stayed with. I say survivors because it is clear that they have recently been assaulted by local enemies. One of the last remaining wizards claimed that local warriors known as ki adepts attacked in the dead of night killing all who resisted. They left only two young poorly trained wizards alive and returned to their homelands with three young untrained witches. Nine purebloods died. I am unsure of the skill level of the deceased Head of House though the wards on this property are respectable.

These ki adepts appear to live in the same region as the Pools of Sorrow, known as 'Jusenkyo' locally. I shall gather information on the Pools of Sorrow as well as these ki adepts for non-magical people who are skilled at killing wizards could be dangerous foes in the future.

Rookwood

Non-magical warriors capable of killing a wizard in his own home? If it were anyone other than Rookwood, the Dark Lord would have hunted down the messenger and killed them for the insult. But it was Rookwood and he was no fool. This could be bad... or it could be very, very good.

Enough. He had a Wizengamot member to tear apart and a spy to test.

* * *

October 29th, 1996

"Lavender?" Parvati smiled and winked to her friend before walking away. Captain sexy pants was back and he brought his transparent bride-to-be with him.

"Yeah, Harry?" Lavender was able to keep from blushing, but a wide grin settled in. Her grin doubled as Usagi waved hello.

"Any leads on a girl for Ron? We've got a match this Saturday and his practice tonight was abysmal. Gryffindor needs you." Harry was a little on edge. He needed a way to shore up Ron's game before the weekend or Ron might just walk off the team on his own.

"You're in luck Harry. It just so happens that I do know someone." Lavender looked between wizard and ghost. "To be honest, she was hoping to be noticed by him first… looks like he's a bit too preoccupied catching quaffles to chase skirts though."

"Sorry about that. We do need him in fighting form though. Can you get her to make the first move? Before Saturday?" Harry looked so desperate. That would never get old for Lavender.

"Well. I think I can promise you a properly focused Ron if you promise me another gossip session with the future Misses Potter and your lovely little ring." She finished her offer with a pinch to Harry's cheek.

Harry and Usagi stopped and looked at each other for a moment. After an unseen wordless discussion, Usagi nodded her head and Harry turned back to Lavender. The British witch was quite impressed as she had yet to see a teenaged couple pull off that kind of silent conversation usually reserved for married couples.

"If you don't mind, Lavender, I'll be giving Usagi the ring tonight and my body along with it. She's been just dying to get another chance to eat real food and do girly things like talk to other girls and the like. You game?" Lavender nodded so enthusiastically that she could have been confused for a house elf.

* * *

October 30th, 1996

Ron was miserable. So miserable, in fact, that he spent half of his breakfast playing with his food rather than eating it. Harry, who had been observing his keeper closely, began to pray for a miracle.

Ask, and ye shall receive, right?

"Budge over, Harry." Lavender approached the boys from behind.

Harry found that the table was too crowded to slide over, so he chose to get up instead. Hermione and Ginny began to pay attention from the other side of the table, but Ron was still pushing little bite sized quaffles past an immobile, syrup soaked keeper. Ron's game couldn't last as his field of vision was suddenly filled with skirt. Skirt?

As soon as Harry got up and stepped away from their house table, Lavender stepped onto open bench. With one foot only inches from Ron's thigh, she stepped across the distracted wizard's lap and then planted her other foot between him and Neville. This got Lavender a lot more attention.

As more and more students began to watch the odd morning display, Lavender pulled Ron's hand away from the plate under her before sitting down directly in Ron's breakfast.

"Good morning, Ron!" Lavender was quite chipper for someone sitting on a plate full of pancakes and syrup.

"….errrr…. yeah, Lavender?" Ron was still looking through her skirt at his plate. Only now was he beginning to realize that a very delicate and prized part of the witch's anatomy also lined up in his gaze.

"Up here, Ron." Ron could hear the smirk in her words and tried to look her in the face. It almost worked.

Only ten or twenty degrees from proper visual alignment, Ron's eyes locked on to a new and wonderful pair of things to look at. Suddenly, Ron was wicked thirsty.

"Eh, close enough… so, Ron. I was thinking." Lavender was okay with Ron staring at her rather impressive mammaries as it was part of the whole 'get Ron's focus on a witch' plan. What she was not okay with was his dreamy smile of incomprehension. She needed him to understand the King's English right now.

She leaned over. While this made her chest bits even more delectably dangly, she was now nose to nose with him.

"Like what you see, Ron? Have I managed to whet your appetite a little?" The boy could only nod stupidly. "I like quidditch players, Won-Won, and seeing Gryffindor win a game gets me all hot and bothered. You want to see me hot and bothered, don't you?"

More stupid nodding. Perfect.

"Well then. You know what to do." Lavender moved off of the table, Ron's eyes never leaving the curvy witch. Just as she was about to go back to her own seat, Lavender looked over her shoulder at Ron. "Be a dear and banish the breakfast off my bum?"

She bent over and put both hands on her knees to present the best target. With supreme effort, Ron restarted his upper brain and banished the delectable, sweet juices off of her delectable, sweet backside.

"Good for you mate! She looks to be a feisty one." Harry stepped back into his seat and resumed breakfast. Ron didn't acknowledge Harry's presence for the rest of the meal as his mind was consumed by the thought of tender breast and thigh meat, though the mouth watering imagery flooding his brain for the rest of the day had nothing to do with chicken or turkey. Today, witch was on the menu.

* * *

Albus Dumbledore relaxed into his chair, or rather, he tried to. The lemon drops innocently displayed to one side of his desk were of the typical muggle mass-produced variety and yet they still taunted him. Perhaps it was time to pick a replacement? Gummy Bears or some butterscotch might be a pleasant change…

With a sigh, the Headmaster of Hogwarts gave himself a mental jolt and focused on the more pressing issues of the day. Issues like young Malfoy's assassination attempts… or the fact that Severus has yet to return from his last audience with Voldemort. That was more than a week ago.

Some of Severus's belongings seemed to be missing too. Albus may not have been keeping a keen eye on his spy's personal belongings before, but when he entered the Slytherin's personal quarters hoping to find his wayward professor, things were obviously amiss. While the castle elves seem to have cleaned up a bit, there's no denying the gaping hole in his library and potions display. Many prominently displayed potions and ingredients were now missing, and Albus didn't know if Severus took them wherever he went or if someone else did. At least one student that he knew of had access to Snape's rooms by way of their own password.

Albus was interrupted in his musings by the door wards. Ah, yes... his after dinner appointment had arrived.

"Come in." Albus always did like catching his visitors off guard.

"Good evening Headmaster." Harry and Hermione chimed in together. They weren't quite as well tuned as the Weasley twins, but then few were.

"And a good evening to the both of you as well. Please take a seat." Albus pointed to the chairs before him and both students did as requested. Hermione looked about in curiosity, keen on memorizing everything she didn't get to closely observe last time she was up here. Odd, the Sword of Gryffindor was no longer mounted on the Headmaster's wall and at least one wall display seemed different though she couldn't remember how. Harry focused on the wizard before them after noting that Fawkes seemed to be out this evening.

"I have some important information that I believe you need to hear... and a favor to ask."

"A favor sir?" Harry wondered what the Headmaster could ask for. Was he finally going to ask for his wand back?

"Let's get the news out of the way first shall we? Right. As you may recall, Professor Snape has been unavailable since the Sunday before last. Since then, I and the other professors have filled the Defense Against the Dark Arts position whenever we were available." Both teens nodded. Harry half expected Snape to disappear once or twice doing dark things for the Dark Bastard this year. "What you don't know is that Professor Snape has left no clues as to his whereabouts or to his return date. I fear that he may be unable to return."

"Do you mean to say that you suspect foul play? That he may be dead, Sir?" Harry didn't want to hear a confirmation anymore than Hermione did, though his response may have been different if this had happened in August.

Albus seemed a bit wearier than usual when he sighed and nodded. "I still hope that Severus may yet return, but there is little evidence in favor of that outcome. I can only hope that he has been drafted into full time potions production."

Hermione reached out and put her hand over Harry's. It didn't matter that he was spoken for; she just needed his touch to settle her nerves. Harry wasn't about to refuse.

"Unfortunately, our current staff is unable to continue this arrangement and I myself am unable to take more than half of the classes due to my duties outside the castle. With the war raging as it is, I am also unable to pull any qualified Order members from their current duties to teach. Finally, even in the best of circumstances the hunt for a new full time Defense professor usually takes one month and frequently takes far longer."

Harry could feel Hermione begin to buzz with excitement. Surely he wasn't really about to-

"While you are still students, and not even Seventh Year students at that, you both did exceptionally well in your D.A.D.A. O.W.L.s. I am offering to make the two of you Assistant Prof-"

"YYYESSSSSssssssss!" Hermione was crushing Harry's hand. He might be happy too if it weren't for an urgent need to see Madam Pomfrey or to pull out the Scepter of Prissiness and heal himself.

"P-perhaps we should allow the Headmaster to explain, 'Mione. I seem to remember having a fairly full schedule this year." The fact that several bones in his hand are being slowly ground together may have something to do with Harry's more reasoned approach to the offer.

"But don't you see?! Don't you see that he wouldn't make an offer like this if he didn't have a way to deal with pesky little things like there not being enough time in the day to both take classes and teach them as well?!" Hermione was all butterflies and sunshine.

If the Headmaster were attempting to buy off Hermione to make up for any transgressions in the past... well it worked.

"She is correct, Mister Potter. I do in fact have an idea of how this can work. It will be tricky, but not impossible." Harry thought for a moment that the Headmaster was going to reach for his candy dish, but he seemed to back off at the last moment. "You actually hold the key to your success already, my boy, even if you do not realize it."

"How so, Sir?" He could already do it? Must not involve a time turner then.

"Let's work it out, shall we? The O.W.L. Year and N.E.W.T. Level courses will be my responsibility and I shall still require some help from the other professors to do even that. What I am asking you to do is teach classes from First to Fourth year."

"All of them sir? That's eight double period classes a week." Hermione was past her initial high and now showed the first signs of panic. Teaching eight double classes and having a full class load as well? Inconceivable.

"It's also a very full three days for the both of you. You may want to consider getting help grading assignments, though I must confess I have no incentives to hand out to any who may help you in this way. The two of you would still have Monday and Tuesday free of teaching duties, aside from grading papers, that is, to take care of your normal coursework." Albus folded his hands together and waited for the next shocked reaction.

"But... but... but what about our own classes? Two days is hardly enough time to take care of our homework unless you're going to let us take possession of a time turner again like you did in our Third Year." Hermione remembered the stress she was under due to her paradox dodging year, and if she were to be honest with herself then she really didn't want to go through that again. But classes needed to be taught... oh, bother.

"As I was saying earlier, Mister Potter already has the answer, I just have to remind him of it." Albus turned from addressing both of them equally to focus on Harry. "Harry. Do you remember when you presented your 'essay, in memory form, of the benefits of using magic in a non-magical world'? Specifically your encounter with the schoolgirl and her professor friend?"

Hermione was lost. If there was a story behind this, then she obviously hasn't heard it yet. Harry was with her for about ten seconds before it hit him.

"You mean how we got away? How I got to Miyako's and Ehara-sensei's house, right?" Albus put one slender finger on his nose and winked. Hermione thought those names were familiar, but just couldn't pull enough detail out of mental deep storage to see what the two wizards were talking about.

"Perhaps a demonstration is in order then. Very well. Just before dinner tonight, I taught a class of Third Years from Ravenclaw and Slytherin. It was a lecture on Vampires to be exact." Albus rose from his chair and walked over to Harry's chair. Harry also stood, prompting Hermione to stand even though she knew not why. "I am ready, my boy."

Harry drew his original wand and pulled a memory from the Headmaster's temple. Hermione briefly looked to see if there were any vials or pensieves nearby only to find that there were none. She almost missed watching Harry place the memory against his own temple and accept it as one of his own. Oh. Oh, right! She did see that before!

"Now Mister Potter. If I asked you to do the work assigned in that class, do you think you could do it?" Harry nodded confidently. Hermione gaped in astonishment; she really wanted Harry to teach her how to do that. "All you have to do is visit your professor after each scheduled class, or a student when the professor is unavailable, and retrieve a memory of each lesson. I would encourage you, should you need to take a student's memory, to take one from one of the better students in class. Perhaps Padma Patil or Daphne Greengrass... student's like those two are quite observant and likely to give you the best memory short of a professor's. You will of course be required to hand in all homework given in your normal classes. You will also need to be able to give practical demonstrations to each teacher to their satisfaction when necessary."

Harry noticed the eye twinkle Albus gave off when mentioning Daphne. Was he trying to add house unity to the mix? On that note, Harry and Hermione were about to sign on to teaching more than half of Slytherin House. If he remembered correctly, Astoria would be one of those he taught.

"There are other lesser details to be taken care of, but I'm sure we can deal with them in the next few days if you accept my proposal tonight. Mister Potter? Miss Granger? What say you?"

Harry looked at Hermione. Hermione looked back at Harry as if she were a little girl looking at her daddy in front of a display of free kittens on Christmas Eve. Harry fell easily to the uber-pout. As if he ever stood a chance... not after Hermione started mewling. Did that polyjuice mishap in Second Year have long term symptoms he wasn't aware of?

"I believe you have two new Assistant Professors, Headmaster. Will we be allowed to punish Malfoy the next time he calls Hermione a mudblood? Can I give detentions and points?" Harry knew this would mess with his schedule horribly, but there had to be some perks to the job.

"You are junior staff and yet still above prefects in most cases. I shall grant you full privileges for awards and punishments for those years that you teach. Everyone should address you as Assistant Professor, but you won't be able to punish the upper years who refuse. Please do report any poor behavior in the upper year students as your report will carry more weight then the same complaint from a typical student." By this time Albus had returned to his chair and was absently juggling a handful of lemon drops.

"I thank you for this opportunity, Headmaster. We won't let you down." Hermione had been given a rare and unique challenge. Christmas came early this year.

"Before you go, I have one more issue that I must discuss with Assistant Professor Potter." Albus looked again at Harry. "I shall leave it to your discretion as to whether Assistant Professor Granger stays or goes for this part of our discussion, young man. It involves our friends the goblins and a request they made on your behalf."

Harry stared in incomprehension for only a moment before it hit him. "Oh! Oh, yes Sir- I mean, Hermione can listen in if she wants. I'd just report to her later if we gave her the boot now."

Hermione glared at Harry but stayed silent. Albus smiled. "Before my last encounter with your Betrothed in Diagon Alley, I was intent on keeping a great many Potter family heirlooms here in Hogwarts for they were quite useful tools to both projecting an image of power and in wielding actual power."

"Items like the Sword of Gryffindor." Harry stated his example calmly. Hermione went bug-eyed at the reference.

"Yes Mist- Professor Potter. In case you were wondering, Assistant Professor can be shortened to Professor in most cases. Back to the heirlooms. The Sword of Gryffindor is a valuable icon of the light wizarding populace of the British Isles as well as a rather pointy sharp object. As it is goblin made, I expect it has more than a few enchantments on it; but as I've never wielded it in anger, I can't say for certain what they would be. Goblin magic does work differently than wizarding magic and my detection spells don't work on the blade nearly as well as they do on anything else."

"And the other items, Sir?"

"All ready for you to take possession as soon as you give the word. I don't blame you for wanting them back, but I would have liked a bit more time with your pensieve." Albus looked as if he were on the edge of asking to keep it.

"You don't have access to another? Did Snape not leave his behind?"

"No. I do not and he did not. Rare as they are, one is about as big a collection as anyone is likely to have, Professor Potter."

"Erm... actually, I picked up another one in China." Headmaster Dumbledore couldn't hide his surprise at that admission. "So... while I'd like the other stuff back, you can hold on to the pensieve for a bit longer."

Albus couldn't help but laugh. "My dear boy. I don't know how you do it, but you have the most amazing luck."

"I suppose I do, Headmaster." Harry looked over to Hermione and wiggled his eyebrows. She rolled her eyes but couldn't keep the smile from taking hold. "I wonder what the Prophet is going to do with this, eh?"

"Magical Wheaties box, remember Harry?" Hermione was right. This is a 'hero' year and not a 'villain' year for Harry. Harry snorted. He completely forgot about saying that.

"I can't recall ever eating that cereal before, but I do remember a rumor about a new Chocolate Frog card with you and your Princess kissing in the picture." Albus looked deep in thought to the teens. To be fair, replacing the lemon drops with Chocolate Frog boxes is a very serious matter.

"I'm going to have a Chocolate Frog card already? I'm a bit young for that, don't you think?"

"Honestly, Harry. This would be your third card."

Wait, _what_? "What?"

Hermione had to blush and look down. She'd never told him before.

"I got my first Potter card just after Second Year. Ron showed me his copy earlier, but I wasn't into the cards before... er... before I was un-petrified. Knowing how much you hated your fame, we thought you wouldn't want to know you had a 'Baby Harry' card. You'd be reminded of your parents." Professor Potter was wide eyed, but agreed with her logic. "After that, you got another one along with Cedric just after the First Task. The pictures on both are of the First Task performances. Again, I had plenty of reasons to keep you from seeing any of those cards. Ron was very helpful in offering to eat over half of your stock. It was far less likely for you to get one of your own cards that way."

"And here we see the loyalty of a Hufflepuff. I'm surprised, Professor Granger, that the sorting hat didn't take longer in deciding your fate." Hermione blushed at the Headmaster's praise. A quick glance at Harry's face proved that she would be unable to look him in the eye for a short while either. Where was that warmth _before_ he went to Japan?

Albus took out a small chest the size of a typical non-magical jewelry box and pushed it across his desk.

"Inside this enchanted chest, you will find all that you ask for. Luckily for us, the Potter pensieve was the only item that didn't fit and therefore it is quite easy to separate from the others. I do believe that tonight's business is concluded, though you both should expect to be contacted by my Deputy quite frequently for the rest of your... employment. You might want to consider what the two of you are going to tell others after I announce your elevated status come lunch time tomorrow."

"Thank you again, Sir. We will, Sir. Good night." Hermione's gratitude was followed by a softer 'good night' from Harry as the two left the Headmaster's office, chest in hand.

"So..."

"So."

"Well?"

"Well, what?"

"Well, aren't you the least bit curious as to what's inside?" Hermione was. She couldn't stop looking at the chest Harry held cradled under his left arm.

"I already know what's inside the chest. I sued him over it. I do need to alert the goblins that the items have been returned when we get back though."

"You are going to show me what's in there, aren't you?"

"Knew it! Hermione wants your family jewels, Harry!" Luna winked at the two as she came even with the both Gryffindors. "Of course, I do too. You'll find that a lot of witches really want your family jewels in their boxes. Not just the witches either. I've heard three wizards in Ravenclaw talk about getting pearl necklaces from you. You wouldn't give a wizard a pearl necklace, would you Harry?" Harry shook his head in the negative rather forcefully. "Excellent! I have a dress that just begs for a pearl necklace. Perhaps I'll wear it for you some time to see if you agree."

Luna looked over to a red-faced Hermione who was trying to look anywhere else.

"You'll just have to tell me if his jewels are tarnished. Nothing beats a good spit polish, you know, and I'm sure that your technique must be different from mine. We simply must compare notes." Harry couldn't tell by Luna's facial expressions if she were being literal or figurative, but part of his anatomy very much favored the latter.

After Luna excused herself for parts unknown, Harry and Hermione shared an awkward trip back to the Gryffindor Boys dorms and Harry's bed. Harry tried vainly to focus on the potential uses of his returned possessions and Hermione stubbornly ignored innuendo. She followed Harry to his bed until the two of them sat down full of nervous tension. Hermione lost her internal battle with curiosity and lightly ran one delicate finger across his exposed chest. After soaking up the feel of several flats and ridges she undid a catch and exposed his personal treasure thus feeding her insatiable need. After a moment that to her seemed an eternity, Hermione's eyes took in the sight of a beautiful hard, round shaft. Harry's breath caught as Hermione gently slid first one finger and then an eager palm over the pronounced, thick red crown of his-

"Hi, Harry! Hermione! What are you two doing?" Usagi had come back from some Girl Time with Myrtle. "Wow! What a pretty sword! Are those rubies?"

"R-right! The Sword of Gryffindor is a family heirloom and I just got it back from the Headmaster tonight along with a few other things." Showing the family jewe- er... heirlooms to Hermione was a must, but if Harry didn't get his breast ma- Best. Mate. If Harry didn't get his best mate Hermione out of there soon then his jewels would be blue rather than red.

Twenty tense minutes later, Hermione left the Sixth Year boys dorm. Seconds later, a wall of privacy charms hid Harry's bed almost as well as the Fidelius would.

* * *

October 31st, 1996

Harry looked a little distracted. Harry also looked like a girl, but the distracted part is what had Ron's attention.

"Hey. Hey, Harry." Ron tossed a half eaten chicken wing onto Harry's shepherd's pie.

Nothing.

"If you want to be Malfoy's girlfriend, then don't say anything."

Silence. Ron leaned over and got his chicken crusted mouth right up next to Harry's ear and-

"Oi!"

Harry jerked flinging bits of chicken across Gryffindor Table and spilling pumpkin juice onto a platter of mashed potatoes. After the laughter and giggles died down, the red faced aquatransexual used a bit of magic to clean her lunch mess before turning to the instigator of it all. Usagi said her goodbyes to Colin and Myrtle five seats down and floated over to her embarrassed knight in shining armor.

"What?"

"Well, you looked a bit... I dunno... Luna like. You were really out of it for a while, mate." Ron resumed his assault on the chicken platter.

Harry thought about it for a moment. "Ron. Think of all of my Halloweens so far. My parents died on one. Then there are the ones you've shared with me to date. The troll. A petrified cat. My godfather. The bloody Goblet of Fire. Last year was sort of quiet in that I didn't get banned from quidditch until a few days after Halloween."

Harry looked over to Hermione. Strange. She wasn't listening in despite her being right next to Harry. What was she looking at anyway?

"I'm sorry Harry. I promise to always make sure that all of your Halloweens are happy from today onward. Every single one of them." What would his life be like without Usagi? Bloody miserable is what. Harry ran her hand through the ghost's side causing Usagi to giggle and slide away.

"Hermione and I are sort of expecting the Headmaster to make an announcement about... you know. That thing we talked about this morning." Ron caught on and nodded. "It's just that I know that something else is coming. I've just... kind of... got this feeling, you know?"

"What? Are you Trelawney now? Gonna teach Divination in your spare time?" Ron chuckled and looked past Harry to Hermione. "So what's gotten into her then?"

"I don't know. She seems to be looking at someone on the other side of the room." Harry waved his hand in front of Hermione's face. "Mione, luv. Snap out of it."

The witch in question did snap out of it only to blush a bit and look down at her plate.

"What's all that about then, Hermione?" Ron asked. She now had two wizards taking an interest in her odd behavior.

"I think she's getting paranoid like you, Harry." Ginny broke in to the conversation from the other side of the table. "She's been watching Malfoy like a hawk for days now. You know something we don't, Hermione?"

"Err, well... it's just that..." Her floundering was cut off as Headmaster Dumbledore stood to address the crowd.

"Attention. If I may have everyone's attention, please." The low rumble typical of a Hogwarts lunch crowd slowly dulled to a few whispers. "Very good. This is usually the kind of announcement I like to make at dinners, but with the Halloween Feast tonight certain allowances had to be made. I trust that the few students unaccounted for now will hear of it soon enough regardless. As you are all aware, Professor Snape has been unavailable to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts for more than a week now. Due to circumstances that need not concern you, Professor Snape's leave of absence is being extended until further notice."

The Headmaster was interrupted by a wave of excited students. While most of them broke into energetic discussions about greasy gits, dozens of students were openly applauding the news.

"Silence!" The buzz of whispers never left, but discipline was restored. "Due to the unusual timing of Professor Snape's departure, the Defense classes will be handled in an unusual way. First: I will personally teach most Fifth Year and above Defense classes... -Albus waited for the applause to die down- …And second: Starting Monday, I am taking two of Hogwarts' best Defense students on as Assistant Professors so that they may teach First through Fourth Year classes."

There was another upswell of student reactions, but they diminished as soon as Albus raised his hands.

"The two students in question have proven themselves to be up to far greater challenges than this in years previous. They have also proven themselves capable of running a defense club even when the school staff was opposed to such extracurricular activities."

The rumors and supposition were beginning to crest again. There were plenty of rumors about the D.A. from last year.

"I ask that you treat them with proper respect both in and out of the Defense classroom. Without further ado, please show your appreciation for Assistant Professors Hermione Granger and Harry Potter."

The student body went nuts. Gryffindors were yelling as if they'd just won the Wold Cup on their own. Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff both showed a fair amount of support even if it wasn't one hundred percent. Many upper year Slytherins reacted with shock and anger. Were it not for the bulk of the student body blocking all angles of attack, the two new Assistant Professors may have faced their first official challenge by way of massed spellfire.

As lunch was almost over, the Headmaster cast a noisemaker charm and got everyone's attention.

"Now we have a minute before many of you must head off to class. I am willing to field a question or two to settle any concerns you may have about being taught by your own peers. So... who would like to start off?" Albus looked around the general student body. Most of them seemed too shocked to come up with a decent question.

"Yo! I got a question!" A girl's call came from the opposite end of the Great Hall. Most students were already looking at the Headmaster and therefore had to turn around to see who spoke up. "Is this Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?"

The girl in question was more of a young woman. A delightfully curvy young Asian woman with bright red hair, a heavy looking backpack and an exotic white and purple cat perched upon her head.

"Hi Red!" Harry jumped up onto Gryffindor Table and waved at her good friend.

"Hi Blondie!" Ranma Saotome had come to Hogwarts.

**Chapter End**

Reviewers:

**Isis the Sphinx –** Yes I am. Thank you for noticing.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** Colin and Myrtle do seem to be working out rather well. I have yet to decide how long that relationship will last.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** I have seen a story or two which give the Hogwarts ghosts a chance to help defend the castle by possessing inferi, but there is a lot more that can be done with these ghosts even if you don't borrow plot devices from the horror genre.

**delta waves –** I can't just say when Usagi comes back, but I will point out a clue for you. Pluto has hinted at the answer more than once. Voldie will die earlier than canon, but telling more just wouldn't be fair. Voldie does have horcruxes but the long tedious hunt for them will be avoided. I got tired of reading horcrux hunt stories and I'm not about to write one.

**Fire From Above –** I first wrote Lulu in because I was sure that no other crime would anger Harry or Usagi more than seeing a child lose his/her soul. The morals of our hero and heroine align perfectly on that point. When I thought up the custody issue, the Greengrasses just jumped out as a clear winner base on my earlier dementor scene.

**SomeGuyFawkes – **I think it will take more than one interview/appearance for Harry to turn sheep into hounds. I just have to figure out if Harry's message will work or not. I'm still unsure if many Prophet readers would actually practice escaping, but Harry would be a fool to encourage sheeple to duel an inner circle member. His next interview could be about the when and how of fighting back.

**nxkris –** I actually intended a shorter turn-around, but I just keep getting ideas about my Veela story that have to be put in the before I forget them. And then there's my HP/OhMyGoddess! Idea, a dark!Harry idea and a smutty one shot idea that all three got sketched out on the side and hidden so that I could focus on the two big ones.

**Ruzio03 –** Glad to hear it.

**cockroach62** – Usagi put herself in the right frame of mind for it. My take on contact between the living and the dead, in this story anyway, is that the ghost's opinion/emotion for the person they touch drives the feeling. Usagi passing through Draco was going to be cold and unsettling. Usagi through Harry? That's passionate and fiery. If you're wondering why Usagi didn't/hasn't possessed Draco... well he is rather strong willed for a ponce and would put up more of a fight. His dim henchmen would be much easier to possess.

**WhiteElfElder –** Good things cum to those who wait. Or those who pay for it, but this a free story site so you'll just have to wait;) If there were a romp... and I'm not sure there will be... then Luna would be next in line. I seem to have a theme with Harry just melting for 8-9 year old girls in my stories so far. It must be from being a Daddy myself.


	5. Chutes and Adders

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

Text shown _§ like this § _is hissed parseltongue.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Five: Chutes and Adders**

October 31st, 1996

As all of Hogwarts looked on in surprise, the woman known as 'Red' leapt thirty meters to land beside Harry atop Gryffindor Table. Anyone hoping that her landing would be graceless and humiliating were sorely disappointed. Red came down with a light 'tap' as if she wasn't wearing a massive backpack threatening to crush anyone it was dropped on. Even more surprising, the cat hadn't moved from its happy perch atop Red's cranium.

As if their sacrifice to the God of Chaos were not yet complete, the ghost of a mahou shoujo detached herself from her boyfriend/fiance and began to bounce up and down on the balls of her immaterial feet.

"_Hey, Ranma! You look great! How do you feel? Did you get enough to eat? The food's really good here. Where's Shampoo? She came too, right? And you're so early! Why are you so early? And what ab- iiieeeee, that tickles!"_ Harry slipped her hand into Usagi's side to get the hyper specter to back down a little.

Harry looked Ranma over, ignoring for a moment that the two of them were standing on top of Gryffindor Table at the end of lunch with most of the staff and student body watching in silence.

"_Apparently airplanes can go really fast. I never really had the money to fly before and Shampoo didn't feel like spending more than a week or two below decks." _Ranma began looking around while fighting back a blush. It was hard to forget how the sex-kitten amazon liked to spar amidships… if you can call that sparring.

"_Shamps is on my head. Didn't I mention she was a Jusenkyo victim too?"_ Harry and Usagi both stared at the preening feline in realization. Realization of more than one point at that.

"_But... but I thought you were afraid of cats. When did that change?" _

Ranma blushed for a second and absently rubbed a hand over the furry little beast purring on his head. _"Well, Shamps read up on some medical books or somthin' on our trip. After a few false starts and one embarrassing night somewhere between New Orleans and Atlanta, she found a treatment that works."_

A polite cough was heard from the Head Table. Oops. Well, they might seem a bit impolite...

"My apologies, Headmaster. I'd like to introduce Ranma Saotome, a close friend whom I met in China. He is a martial artist the likes of which you are not likely to meet again in this lifetime." Harry looked back to Ranma. "Maybe we should get off the table."

The two gender cursed boys stepped down and began a short trip to the Head Table. As before, they were the subject of intense stares and absolute silence.

On the way up, Harry grabbed a cup of water from one of her fellow lions. She handed it to Ranma who immediately flash-heated the cup and stuck two fingers in. Gasps were heard throughout the room as Ranma gained muscle mass, height and had some naughty bit changes. Everyone saw that this Asian wizard had the same ability as Assistant Professor Chosen One. More than a few young wizards had to keep from throwing up after discovering that they were having pervy thoughts about one of their own. By the time three young friends who first met at the Pools of Sorrow were in front of Headmaster Dumbledore, Harry had also managed to regain his wedding tackle.

Ranma took a moment to consider the evidence before him. Harry looked happy and healthy. His ki read as being 'not pregnant' and he also seemed quite content. Harry appeared to be on good terms with his Headmaster AND that Snape guy wasn't anywhere nearby. As these were all good signs, Ranma took the safe path and sketched out a small bow before addressing the school head.

"Greetings Headmaster. I'm Ranma Saotome, a Master of the Musabetsu Kakuto Ryu." Ranma released a tightly controlled pulse of ki; his newly created personal curriculum vitae. "I trust you and Harry have buried the hatchet? And not in each other's backs, I mean."

Albus got the distinct impression that the answer to that question was quite important to his continued health and well being.

"Quite, Mister Saotome. I did indeed see the error of my ways and hope to re-earn Assistant Professor Potter's respect. Now, I would love to hear the reason behind your visit, but I have a bit of business to attend to first." Albus quickly glanced over Harry's shoulder hinting that they were still the center of attention of hundreds of magical schoolchildren.

Albus rose to address the assembled students. "While I can understand that it is exceptionally rare for Hogwarts to receive guests in this manner, I must ask that you all make haste to your next classes, lest you find yourself tardy. Off you go."

The Headmaster's appeal shocked the student body out of it's stupor and they began moving out of the Great Hall amidst great noise and excitement. Several Professors also took this opportunity to rush away, lest they be late for their own classes.

"Professor Potter, I trust you can help Mister Saotome find a place to rest before heading off yourself?"

"Yes, Headmaster."

As much as Harry wanted to skip the next class or three Assistant Professor Granger was quite adamant that skiving off classes was not proper behavior for a junior staff member. He did manage to shrink and stow Ranma's pack until someone could decide where the two visiting Jusenkyo victims would be sleeping tonight.

All through the evening, Harry spent his time introducing Ranma to his close friends and the occasional curious D.A. member. Shampoo made the switch from cat to hottie much to the appreciation of every male to make her acquaintance. When not making introductions, the two trans-gender cursed boys caught up on each other's lives from their Tokyo lunch date with Cuteness to now. Ranma wanted to see the second patronus herd. Harry wanted to see this sash that Shampoo kept mentioning. It was almost enough to make anyone forget about the match coming up tomorrow.

Almost, that is, unless your name was Ron Weasley, in which case cursed people from half way around the planet were useless distractions from the quaffle. Two quaffles, really. Two soft, bouncy quaffles that Lavender Brown might just put into play for the Gryffindor keeper as long as he can prove himself worthy of her time.

* * *

November 1st, 1996

"Excuse me. Mister Saotome?"

"Yeah?" Ranma didn't look up from his breakfast. It was important to show Ron that he knew nothing about the art of breathing food.

"Well... my friends and I were just wondering what wizarding disciplines were important to a martial artist. What magics are generally taught in Japan?" Ranma still didn't turn around but Harry and a few others did.

The young wizard was a Ravenclaw that Harry hadn't really been introduced to yet, but would probably get to know soon enough in Defense classes judging by his apparent age.

"I don't cast magic kid, just defend against it. If you want to know about Japanese magical combat, then talk to the ghost to my left." Hmmmmmmmm. Bacon. Bacon should always be spelled with a capital B, as it's just that tasty.

"But... but why would any wizard fight without magic?"

Harry interrupted, "Ranma here is a martial artist, a ki master. He's not a wizard."

Now _that_ admission was going to cause a commotion. Nobody had seen Ranma or Shampoo pick up wands and cast spells yet, but it was generally assumed that only wizards and witches could enter Hogwarts Castle.

"You're a muggle?! How did you get in the castle then?" Blurting it out caused a lot of commotion.

Ranma set his cutlery down and looked at the boy.

"Listen... erm, what's your name?" Harry was determined to take over this conversation before it took a bad turn.

"S-Stewart. Stewart Ackerley." Young Stewart's nerves were beginning to overcome his shock. Not only was there a muggle in Hogwarts, but the Chosen One had just asked Stewart what his name was!

"Listen, Mister Ackerley." Now was as good a time as any for Harry to start in on his Assistant Professor Potter persona. "First, you will find that those non-magical people that do know about magic probably don't like the word 'muggle'. It's cut from the same cloth as 'mudblood' you see..."

Young Mister Ackerley looked pole-axed. Harry Potter had just censured him in front of everyone!

"Second, as a ki master, Ranma can shrug of weak things like castle wards if that's what it takes to kick your arse. Third, I'm fairly certain that there isn't a single person in this room that could stop Ranma from kicking your arse. And by 'there isn't a single person' I include myself, every professor and even the Headmaster in that statement. Perhaps, Mister Ackerly, you should apologize to Mister Saotome?"

It took a moment for young Stewart to realize that it was his turn to talk again. Merlin, getting lectured by Potter already felt like making a bad mistake in McGonagall's class.

"Ummm. Sorry." Nobody moved. "I mean I'm sorry Mister Saotome. We don't learn much about ki masters and non-wizarding things at Hogwarts..."

Harry figured that this was probably as good as they were going to get. He looked over to Ranma who nodded before speaking.

"Apology accepted."

Ranma would let things settle there, but Harry was feeling oddly professorial at that moment and saw an opening to really help this Ravenclaw out.

"No harm done, then. There's no need for punishments... but if I may make a suggestion, Mister Ackerley..." The boy in question nodded immediately. "Just because Hogwarts doesn't have a class in something does not mean it isn't worth learning. You might want to consider researching the topics of Eastern magic and ki masters. If you don't find what you need in the Hogwarts Library then you could ask Hermi- I mean Assistant Professor Granger for some help as she's already done some research along those lines."

The Ravenclaw wizard nodded again and shuffled away. Already the rumor mill was buzzing; not only had the newly minted Assistant Professor made it known that he considered 'muggle' to be derogatory, but that he had also claimed that this non-magical girl-turned-boy from Japan was strong enough to ignore the Headmaster if he/she wanted to! It was one thing to believe that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named returned from the dead to once again terrorize their country, but to believe that a muggle could take Albus Dumbledore? Inconceivable!

Few students would get to ask any more in depth questions to Harry, his 'muggle' friends or anyone else who might know anything before Saturday's match between Gryffindor and Slytherin. Any time the Chosen One wasn't in class, he was either showing Ranma and Shampoo around with Usagi and/or one of his other close friends, or he was in private talks with the Deputy Headmistress and Assistant Professor Granger (who smiled every time someone used her new title). There was also a scheduled Gryffindor team practice, but that was all business and went smoothly as soon as Lavender took a seat in the stands near Hermione and began winking suggestively at Ron. He went from missing the first three shots on goal to catching the next twelve in a row. When Lav-Lav heard Hermione and Usagi make some joke about 'cheerleaders', she asked them what those were. Between the two witches and one deceased mahou shoujo, a plot was hatched. A plot that had the potential to shape Hogwarts' quiddtich tradition for centuries to come: the Gryffindor House Cheerleader Squad was concieved.

Soon, Playwizard would have a new fetish to cater to.

* * *

November 2nd, 1996

"Nearly time!" Harry called out to his team.

This was going to be great! Sure, it was cold and the icy grass was crunching underfoot, but they were going to pound Slytherin today, he just knew it.

_~Are you sure I'm going to like this, Harry?~ _ Usagi was riding shotgun with Harry today, as he really wanted her to see for herself what quidditch was all about.

_~Of course, Love. Think of me as the best roller coaster you're ever going to ride. It'll be brilliant, promise!~_

_~I like roller coasters, but I scream on them too. You can't be angry if I scream in your head.~_

"Looks great out there!"

Ginny was in Heaven. The youngest Weasley was going to play on Harry's team against Slytherin. Only having Harry bed her tonight in appreciation for her chasing skills could possibly add to the day's potential, but she was still wavering on using the family recipes. That bogart back in Steep Holm had really thrown her, but denial was a powerful force and one of the family love potions was only days away from being ready. She just needed some of Neville's spit... how she's supposed to get that, Ginny still didn't know.

"That Slytherin Chaser, Vaisey, took a bludger in the head yesterday and they'll have to replace him for the game. Even better than that... Malfoy's gone off sick too!"

"What?" Harry turned to his redheaded chaser. "What's wrong with him?"

"No idea, but it's good for us, right?" Ginny said brightly "Harper's seeking instead. He's in my year and he's an idiot."

"Fishy, isn't it? You said Hermione's been paying more attention to the ferret recently... maybe there's something to it." Harry remembered how his best witch friend had almost said something a few days ago, but then so much happened since then that he didn't remember to press the issue.

"We can worry about 'Mione and Ferret Boy after we stomp the snakes in front of the entire school, Harry. Keep your head in the game!" Ron wasn't messing around. His tongue had a date with Lavender's throat tonight and no flighty seeker was going to mess it up for him.

"Yes, Sir! Mister Star Keeper, Sir!" Harry could do that.

The game itself started as any game should. The stands were packed full of students supporting one team or another with either end smothered in one of the two house color schemes depending on which keeper they were behind. Luna's lion-topped hat could just be heard over the roar of the regular crowd as the players zipped into the air at Madam Hooch's signal. Harry began to gain altitude and a new announcer's voice could be heard over the din of the crowd.

"Well, there they go, and I think that we'll see some interesting play from Gryffindor today. After Ron Weasley's patchy performance as Keeper last year, his first practices of the season seemed to be equally poor until just yesterday..." Jeers and applause from the green end of the pitch met the commentating so far. Harry turned to see who was at the commentator's podium. Zacharias Smith. Why was a D.A. member belittling one of his own? "...but that all changed in one practice when the close friend of Assistant Professor Captain Chosen One seemed to get his mind on the game and began to show the same promise that all recent Weasleys seem to have for the game. Urquhart should not expect an easy win today."

Harry nodded to himself as he watched Ron block the first Slytherin attempt and hand the quaffle off to Ginny who tore past him followed closely by a bludger. Once again, Harry turned skyward and climbed a few hundred more feet to get a good full pitch survey started.

As soon as the dull roar of the crowd subsided below, Harry's ears began to pick up on noises that hadn't been quite so important before. The sharp whistle of wind undisturbed by trees and castles. Faint calls from a bird or two near the edge of the Forbidden Forest. Soft rhythmic thumps accompanied the footfalls of a group of giants stepping into Hogsmeade Village with fists held high.

_~What the hell are those things, Harry?~_

Wait, what?

One, two... five giants. ~_Giants! Bloody Hell!~ _Harry and Usagi saw one of the hulking beasts drive his fist into the side of a two story building. People began to pour out of nearby buildings like ants.

The nose of Harry's Firebolt dropped straight down and the Gryffindor Seeker flew down faster than any falling rock ever could. Inside his head, Usagi shrieked like mad. She wanted off of this ride.

"And what's this? Has Potter seen the snitch already? The Gryffindor Seeker is dropping faster than I've ever seen anyone and- wait... what's this? He's stopping in front of the Headmaster!"

Harry did indeed pull nose to nose with Albus in the Professors' stands.

"Giants in Hogsmeade, Sir! Call off the match!" Without wasting breath or giving Albus the chance to tell Harry to stop, he kicked his Firebolt around and flew out of the pitch straight to his dormitory window. He would need the Scepter of Prissiness for this kind of action, and maybe a sex change to get the crystal focus properly attuned to his/her power needs.

"Sonorus. **This quidditch match is over! All students back to their dormitories. Giants are attacking Hogsmeade Village. I repeat: students back to your dormitories until the danger passes.**" At this pronouncement by the Headmaster, Madam Hooch blew on her whistle declaring the game officially over.

As shouts and confusion overtook the stands, Albus and those of his staff that were more active in the fight between light and dark took to the air by broom or to the trail leading to the school gates at the end of the ward line.

"Giants? Where!" Ranma smelled a challenge. It had been weeks since he had a good challenge.

"In Hogsmeade Village." Hermione pointed in the general direction of Hogsmeade for reference. "It's quite close by, actually, but we've been told to head into the castle."

"C'mon, Shamps! Real giants! I got dibs on the big one!" Without so much as a by your leave, Ranma leapt out of his seat and bounded over the stadium wall in two or three great leaps. Shampoo was only one step behind him. As the last day was full of rumors of the muggle in Hogwarts, this seemingly impossible feat caused many in the crowd to stop and stare.

Only seconds later, a blonde on a Firebolt blew straight over the pitch on the way to Hogsmeade.

"Harry must not have heard the Headmaster! We have to go tell her and keep her safe!" Hermione shouted her statement to the general crowd where several D.A. members could overhear.

"But, 'Mione!" Ron had flown over to the Gryffindor stands and Hermione's position somewhat expecting a rescue team to be organized. "Maybe he doesn't want to be kept safe?"

"I said... We have to gooooo..."

"...nudge, nudge..." Luna had wrestled her way to Assistant Professor Bookworm.

"... to Hogsmeade to telllll herrrr..."

"...wink, wink..."

"... and keep her safe!"

"A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat." Ginny added the final line. They must have been practicing or something.

Ron had it. They were with him all along. "Say no more."

Professors still in their seats were surprised when two Gryffindor team players and two other students turned and flew to Hogsmeade in all due haste. They were shocked when another two dozen or so Gryffindor team fliers and random students seemed to expand personal broomsticks and leap into the air after their friends and fellow D.A. members.

Half-way between the quidditch pitch and Hogsmeade, Harry came even with Ranma. Ranma and Shampoo both took that opportunity to jump onto Harry's Firebolt. After an initial dip, Harry pulled hard and brought the overloaded broom under control. They just needed to go one way really fast, anyway.

"Ideas?" Harry looked to her passengers, both on the broom and in her head.

"I'm gonna knock the shit out of them!" Ranma was simple and to the point.

"I'll trip one up, keep it off balance." Shampoo may not have the power and control of Ranma, but the Joketsuzoku warrior was no lightweight.

_~If Ranma is the sword of our group, Harry, you can be the shield. I'll help you make the biggest shield possible.~_

"I'll shield the village and two you can bring the bastards down!" Harry looked ahead and saw villagers fleeing several crushed buildings on one end of the main thoroughfare.

Two giants had made it into the village proper while three of them were only just getting into the damage zone. Ranma and Shampoo both chose their targets.

"Blondie! Keep the last three from coming in and we'll hammer the first two! Hold steady; I'm gonna jump!" Ranma felt it was only fair to warn Harry as they were flying on a broom and not something more substantial.

Harry felt a sudden jerk and had to fight for broom control once again. She was the only Firebolt rider left. With a hard pull and a braking maneuver, Harry came between the last three giants and everything else.

"Protego Diligo!" _~Help me, Love! Let's hold this one together!~ _

When Harry first cast her shield spell, the Scepter of Prissiness flared and a visible silver ripple distorted the air ten meters in front of Harry radiating out at least fifty meters up and to each side. Almost immediately afterwards, Harry's forehead flared with a golden crescent moon and Usagi's natural well of power was once again made available to Harry. The rippling transparent magical wall before them turned from silver to gold and expanded over a hundred meters more in every direction. The door to Hogsmeade was closed.

Harry heard a loud _**CRACK**_ behind her, but chose not to turn around lest her own wall fail the coming challenge.

The crack was that of a skull, specifically a giant skull. Ranma had leapt from Harry's broom directly towards the giant furthest inside Hogsmeade. His arc took him clear over a nearer giant, one which would become Shampoo's target. After bouncing off of one roof ledge and using the giant's own shoulder as purchase for his final handspring, the ki master touched down on several square meters of scalp. Rather than kill the beast outright with a cutting or exploding attack, Ranma channeled ki into an open palm strike, thus the resounding crack Harry heard.

The giant's slow advance on wizarding homes stalled, its balled fists lowered abruptly. Ranma was not content to simply wait for him to fall unconscious and chose to help matters along by dropping behind the behemoth and launching bludger sized balls of bright blue ki into the back of it's left knee. The giant finally did fall backwards and to one side just as expected. It's landing zone was right between it's brother and Harry.

**THUMP**

Shampoo had not been idle either. Rather than leap for her giant's head, she aimed for the great boulder it had picked up planning to roll a whole block flat. While Ranma had been giving her advanced ki lessons of late, the amazon chose to use one of her people's most effective and earliest techniques; the Breaking Point Technique. Shampoo brought one seemingly delicate finger down onto rough stone between two of the giant's tree limb like digits and dumped a massive mount of ki into an almost invisible hairline fracture in the stone's mass.

_**BOOOM**_

While less technically advanced than what Ranma did, Shampoo's strike did cause one third of the multi-tonne boulder to instantly become a cloud of shrapnel capable of severely stinging the giant and causing him to drop the boulder on his own foot. The dull roar of an angry giant was heard clear back to Hogwarts. After releasing her own ki enough to glow with a light blue corona, Shampoo got the stupid beast's attention with an explosive ki ball to the nose right before leaping into a forest to the side of Hogsmeade Village. It roared a second time and followed her.

As Shampoo lept into the forest and Ranma was turned to help his amazon... err... really close friend with benefits... Harry's first customer arrived.

If it wasn't such a life or death situation, Harry would have laughed when the nearest giant walked face first into her shield, busting his enormous nose open and spilling gallons of blood on the ground. Harry nearly lost it when the next giant in line walked around his stumbling companion only to walk right into her shield the exact same way as it's friend had. Only the last giant in line seemed smart enough to hold out one hand and tentatively push on the magical wall. Luckily, the thing was too stupid look for an end to walk around. It simply kept pushing against her magic.

Harry didn't look away when another loud _**CRACK**_ rent the air from where Ranma and Shampoo began double teaming the angry giant Shampoo lured away from Hogsmeade.

**THUMP**

Another one down for the count.

"Harry!" Again, Harry's focus didn't waver, but this was getting old really fast.

"Can't talk now, too busy shielding!" After that one outburst, Harry went quiet again.

The students landing in a cloud around her first took a moment to gape in awe at what must be the largest non-ward personally generated shield spell in the history of the Wizarding World. The Scepter of Prissiness was constantly lit like what the muggleborn in attendance would equate to a halogen lamp's intensity. None of the students that tried to stare at it could do so for more than a second. Harry's scepter was beginning to hum too.

Hermione shook herself out of it and put together a plan.

"Let's get together in groups and look for the wounded! Get them away from these giants while Harry still has the power to keep this shield up!" Gryffindor quidditch players and D.A. members split into smaller groups and scanned the danger zone. There now seemed to be four ruined buildings and two or three heavily damaged ones.

Five students refused to leave Harry's side. They had been through worse than this in the Department of Mysteries and they weren't about to let Harry 'Saving People Thing' Potter face down three giants alone.

Hermione and the others could see dozens of frightened wizards and witches several storefronts down who were being herded away by what appeared to be a Hogwarts Professor or two.

**-pop-**

"My word, what a fascinating shield spell." Albus Dumbledore had arrived.

_**CRACK**_

In front of them, one of the three blocked giants suddenly looked like it was going to drop to the ground. Two martial artist sized specks leapt from it's head to the next giant down the line.

**THUMP**

"Please don't interrupt Harry right now, Sir. He's really focused on that shield right now and I'd rather not see it dropped while there's still two-

_**CRACK**_

-one giant still on the loose to make a run for the townspeople."

"Indeed." The Headmaster looked around to see three groups of students levitating injured people back to the healers he just apparated away from. Help was just now coming from the Ministry through floo connections in several buildings at the opposite end of the village. Even as they watched, a group of aurors arrived by portkey in front of Honeydukes.

**THUMP**

"I daresay this is the best result we could have hoped for. It took us a minute or two to find the anti-apparition wardstone that someone so carelessly discarded near Scrivenshafts... and once again the floo connections had to be reset as they were somehow blocked."

_**CRACK**_

"I suspect that Minister Scrimgeour will have to take Professor Potter's advice about looking for saboteurs in the Floo Office to heart now."

As the group watched, the last giant fell in a boneless heap just outside of town. Ranma and Shampoo were done.

**THUMP**

"You can drop the shield now, Harry." Hermione's hand reached up to gently touch the straining girl's shoulder.

A second later, the shield fell from it's golden form back to the smaller silver form before disappearing altogether. Harry lowered the Scepter of Prissiness and slowly turned around.

"Merlin, that was hard." Harry wiped a bit of sweat off her brow with the edge of her team robe. As she did, Usagi appeared by her side beaming over the results of their combined efforts. "Was there any loss of life, Headmaster?" Usagi lost her smile. She hadn't thought of that.

"It's too early to say, Professor Potter. I'll go tell the healers from Saint Mungo's that it's now safe to venture forward. I also see the aurors approaching. I daresay that the students who disregarded my orders to return to their dormitories will be free to be held accountable soon."

While Ginny's eyebrows shot up in righteous indignation, a few others expected this reaction.

"Will we also be given credit for our good deeds, Headmaster?" Hermione was trying to be diplomatic about it.

"A good point, Professor Granger. Also, one must consider whether two of your number were here in their capacity as students or as staff members."

"I'm afraid I'll have to recuse myself from that issue, Headmaster." Hermione again.

"What a noble sentiment, Professor Granger. Oddly enough, neither the Ministry nor the school have any rules pertaining to that muggle law practice, so feel free to offer your opinions however biased they may be." Harry had caught her breath just enough to follow that and chuckled under her breath. 'Figures.'

"Well, Sir... One could argue that Professor Potter, being an expert in matters of Defense _and_ having access to the unique skills of our ki master guests, performed his duty to defend the students of our school and the surrounding wizarding population by implementing a strategy no other group of three individuals in the whole of the British Isles could have possibly come up with. It was a case of using the right tool for the job. I and Professor Potter's advanced students arrived to further our crisis management skills by seeing to the wounded and, if necessary, redirecting one of the giants should Harry's shield have failed early. It didn't fail, by the way."

"That was some excellent logic for being thought up on such short notice."

"I don't know what you mean, Sir."

"Of course you don't. Not to worry. First, I am afraid that for each normal student outside of their dormitories right now, I shall have to deduct five points. However, every student who assisted in Hogsmeade today has earned their house twenty points for their noble deeds. It is unfortunate that I cannot give points to professors or Professor Potter would be receiving... hmmmmm... one hundred points per giant... no, two hundred points for each giant he stopped from entering the village. I daresay there will be another plaque for special services to the school in his future... and should anyone have been carrying a camera today this could be an excellent chocolate frog card subject, don't you think Professor Potter?" Harry just rolled her eyes

"What about Ranma and Shampoo then? I held three giants at bay for five minutes, but they knocked all five flat before my shield fell. Don't they deserve some recognition?" Just as Harry ended her plea, the martial artists in question both stepped up to the group.

"Damn, that was fun! When can we do that again?" Ranma was bright eyed and chipper while Shampoo's cheeks were flushed and her was breathing a little short.

"Mister Saotome... Miss Shampoo... I don't know how often I can guarantee you two another challenge like that one, but I would like to offer you both staff positions at Hogwarts. Our students are growing up in a rather dangerous environment and few of them have the natural talent that is common for this group assembled before you. I would ask that you keep the children safe as well as help teach them a thing or two about surviving when they don't have wands in hand."

"We get room and board in the deal?" Access to a bed and a kitchen, that's all that Ranma really needed to live anywhere on Earth.

"And a monthly stipend to see to personal needs." As Albus relayed that last bit, Ranma and Shampoo looked at each other. True, neither of them came to England with the intent of getting a job, but they did come for Harry... to help him fight. As long as Harry was at Hogwarts, it made sense for them to stay in the castle too.

"You got a deal, Headmaster."

"Now that we got all that dealt with, it's time for the real question to be answered." Albus raised an eyebrow at Ron, who had been quiet up to now.

"When is the match going to be rescheduled? We were going to absolutely crush Slytherin today, I just know it, and then those bloody giants come in to town and ruin my victory." Don't forget, giants interrupted his plan to scale the twin peaks of Mount Lavender later this evening.

"Language, Ronald!"

Well, he did start the game off well... and they all did just save Hogsmeade together. Ron smiled. He might just get somewhere tonight after all.

* * *

November 3rd, 1996

POTTER SAVES HOGSMEADE

By Arthur Anderson

Hogsmeade Village was attacked by giants yesterday morning just as the first match of the Hogwarts quidditch season got underway. While this was not the only terror attack on British soil to be carried out yesterday, it was the only one Harry Potter managed to observe as the Gryffindor Seeker began his hunt for the snitch against Slytherin House.

Witnesses in the stands claim that Potter dove to the Headmaster almost as soon as he had reached proper seeking position. He reported his discovery of the attack moments before leading a select group of students to fend off the giants until help could arrive from Ministry offices. How can students hold back giants? As in more than one? One resident of Hogsmeade who wishes to remain nameless claimed that she saw the Chosen One ride into the thick of things still wearing his Gryffindor quidditch robes with his name and number, seven, clear for all to see. Potter then dismounted his broom directly in front of a group of three giants and cast what could have been the most powerful shield spell known to modern wizardry! Our source described the encounter as follows: "Protego was part of the incantation. I remember that part of it at least, but as I was coverin' myself from fallin' pots an' such, I di'n't get the whole thing. I was amazed that someone would even try to stand up t' those things, so I look out the window to see who it was... and what do ya' know? If it wasn't Potter hisself castin' the biggest shield I ever saw. It was all silver at first and blocked maybe three homes an' went taller than any of the giants I could see, but then he did somethin' and it went all gold and grew more 'n twice again its first size! And the dull brutes couldn't get through! He kept three giants out of Hogsmeade proper while 'is school chums went about from house to house lookin' for the hurt and bleedin'. Bless 'em all!"

It's clear that two other giants did indeed get into the village before the Chosen One could stop their assault, but those two were dealt with in record time by Ministry aurors who were already responding to calls of dark wizard activity across Britain and Scotland. All told, the terrorists known as Death Eaters and their dark creature allies struck no fewer than thirteen different targets between dawn and the witching hour. While many tragic losses were incurred(see DEATH STALKS BRITAIN below), Hogsmeade is now being considered a victory for the Light. Nine wizards and witches were taken to Saint Mungo's from Hogsmeade, but shockingly there were no deaths in the giant attack. Less than a dozen buildings in the village were damaged.

Interestingly, two witnesses claimed that it was Princess Serenity who defended Hogsmeade and not her Betrothed Lord Potter. They claim that Hogsmeade's savior was wearing Potter's quidditch robes and riding his broom, but that Lunar Royal blonde hair and a crystal wand were clearly visible in the casting. Many rumors of Potter having the unheard of animagus form of a witch have been pouring out of Hogwarts since September first. These rumors range from having tragic lovers doomed to share the same body to ancient Chinese magic and a Ghost Bride. Also entering the rumor mill yesterday were tidings of both Harry Potter and Hermione Granger being promoted to Assistant Professor for Defense Against the Dark Arts. Lord Potter, Harry, if you are reading this, please consent to an interview to set the record straight.

ENGLISH MAGICALS SAVE THEMSELVES

By Constance Brown

That's right! Give yourselves a big hug Magical England. It seems that at least someone was paying attention when Lord Potter, also known as Captain Sexy Pants in the Gryffindor Common Room, told Mister Anderson about not rolling over and playing dead for dark wizards. Good thing, too, 'cause we could use a happy ending or two with all the wand-and-dagger goings on yesterday.

Out first happy story of the day comes to us from Tintagel in Cornwall. I heard by way of my brother's friend's mother's cousin that the fair maidens of Anthrax School of Witchcraft and Textiles Production were successful in repelling a vampire attack shortly before the witching hour. As dark creatures were pounding savagely on the school's front gates, upper year students Zoot and Dingo Lovegood filled a Grail shaped beacon with holy water, garlic and hot sauce before dumping the mix out a front window. I've never heard of that potion mix before, but it must have worked because the vampires were seen to be quite brassed off about it. Or maybe it was the second Grail full of witch dung that done them in. Anyway, our great nation's chief repository of chaste maidens is locked down as tight as a goblin's... sorry, I can't print that. Zoot, Dingo and all the witches of Anthrax shall be safe and peril free for another year.

Speaking of peril, a young pureblood wizard and his blushing muggleborn bride were attacked in a cottage they had just moved into overlooking the cliffs of Dover. Aurors responded to a messenger patronus (tricky bit of magic, that one) just before tea to find the bride sobbing into her groom's chest with three dead Death Eaters underfoot. How did they die? According to Auror Shacklebolt, whom I had the honor of speaking to last night, the new husband and wife were resting between bouts of naughtiness when three dark wizards came in with wands waving and they begin to hex the groom. As the young missus was wandless when they came in, they ignored her but for a few lewd comments about what she could expect her fate to be after they done in her wizard. Not content to play the damsel in distress, she retrieved her father's wedding gift; a muggle firearm. The muggleborn wife killed two Death Eater's outright before the third thought to send a spell her way. Before the dark wizard could finish incanting the killing curse, her wounded husband cast an exploding curse into the dark wizard's back. The couple have now gone into hiding across the Channel to prevent other dark wizards from seeking revenge.

While Harry Potter's last interview with the Daily Prophet was more about protecting your loved ones than fighting back, he did point out that we can't always just cower in fear until the aurors arrive. Maybe if we're all good little wizards and witches this year, Harry will tell us how to fight back come Yule. With any luck I'll catch him under the mistletoe during this year's Ministry Yule Ball which he's rumored to be attending! I promise, Father Christmas, I've been much less naughty of late than in years past!

For Death Eater successes, see page 2.

For a reprint of Potter's interview, see page 4.

"Well, they forgot to mention Ranma and Shampoo in Hogsmead, but then they completely ignored the Rotfang Conspiracy's obvious interference at my cousins' school. Typical." Luna was reading the Daily Prophet over Hermione's shoulder at breakfast Monday morning.

Of Harry's close friends, only Usagi, Ranma and Shampoo were not at the Gryffindor Table. After finding out how to get into the kitchens, the two martial artists immediately revised their schedules to revolve around training and research time. Usagi chose to tag along with them this morning to get some more good gossip out of the former Nerima residents.

"I'm not surprised, Luna. Rufus wants to be seen as fighting back even when others are doing the fighting for him. If he expects me to attend that Ball, then he better do something about the floo problem. I shouldn't have gotten to Hogsmeade before aurors, not for any reason… and what if I hadn't been able to cast that shield, anyway? He owes me." Harry grumbled out his response from the other side of the table.

While most of the students who participated in the defense of Hogsmeade were in high spirits, Harry himself was far more somber. Every day he spent not killing Voldemort was another day Voldemort spent killing someone else.

"Harry? Can I see your ring please? The one with the jewel in it."

Without thought, Harry reached his left hand over the table to Luna so that she could see the ring. Luna grabbed Harry's whole hand as soon as it was in reach and pushed it down over Hermione's plate.

"Aha! Just as I thought. Guardian angels rarely look so sickly as this one unless they've missed something."

"You mean to say that I really have a guardian angel?" Hermione would have discounted Luna's declaration immediately this past July, but today…

"She means, 'Mione, that you can't eat off that plate. It's been potioned." Harry was staring at his hand and the ring on his hand only inches above Hermione's plate. The stone was solid red.

"The food's been potioned, yes... but your guardian angel really has seen better days, Hermione. Harry's is in fighting form, but then he should be as often as he's called into action."

Hermione began to hack and cough out the food that was in her mouth as Luna and Ginny gave her helpful pats on the back. Harry snatched up Hermione's plate and stood up. He was not going to let evidence get banished by house elves eager to clean. Spying the proper Professor casually discussing something or other with his fellow teaching staff at the Head Table, Harry promptly sought him out.

"Professor Slughorn?"

"Harry, my boy! Or should I say Professor Potter? It's good to see you up here young man." The Potions Master turned from his table mate, Professor Sinistra, to Harry with a jovial smile.

"Thank you, Professor. I'd like to thank you for taking the time last week to talk to me about my mother, Sir. Not many people volunteer to do that." Harry was genuine in his praise, and for that Slughorn's smile grew greater still.

"Think nothing of it, Harry! I've got loads to say about one of the brightest witches to ever sit in my classroom. We simply must do that again. Perhaps you could bring your young miss, the Princess, with you… I'd love to get to meet the next Misses Potter."

"I'm sure something could be arranged Sir, but today I need your help." Harry set Hermione's plate down on the table before Horace.

"Something wrong with the service this morning, Harry?" The Potions Master eyed Harry's offering. "Looks no different than what I got myself."

"It's not the elves I have a compliant with… or then again, maybe it could be. You see Sir, this is Hermione's plate and I'm fairly certain that there is a potion of some sort in her food. Can you discover what it is? Perhaps give me an idea of who put it there?" All traces of amusement left Slughorn's face.

"That is a serious accusation, Assistant Professor Potter. I'd hate to think anyone here would tamper with the food of a fellow member of the staff." Horace took the plate of breakfast foods and made to leave the table. "I shall get right on this… I'd recommend taking Assistant Professor Granger to see Madam Pomfrey at once."

Horace Slughorn's departure from the Great Hall made many stand up and take notice, but Harry ignored them in favor of a new dilemma. He could tell that, while agitated, Hermione did not seem to be showing any signs of unusual behavior or ill health. Should they have her checked out or should he offer to heal her immediately and risk losing possible evidence of the crime?

Harry did end up escorting his long time friend to the Hospital Wing after Professor Slughorn's recommendation became a mandate from the Headmaster. Albus was most adamant that Madam Pomfrey be allowed to see to Hermione's health. Harry's performance in morning classwork suffered greatly as his mind focused on what possible clues could have pointed to her suffering from the effects of some silent killer or mind control draught of some sort. Granted, she's been watching Malfoy more often lately, but that's only unusual in that she's doing Harry's job for him this year.

It was a disturbed Harry along with Ron and Usagi who went to visit Hermione in the Hospital Wing during lunch when she had yet to return to class or the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Heromi- er, Professor Slughorn?" The Slytherin Head of House was standing beside Hermione's bed. The bushy haired witch seemed to be sleeping the day away. Induced, no doubt. Harry wanted to know why. "May I ask how she's doing?"

"Of course, Harry. Well. It seems that someone... and I have a good guess as to who... got their hands on a subtle version of amorentia." Harry seized up. Hermione was being given a love potion? "She'll be free of it's influence by the time she wakes, but there may be a problem. Harry, she's going to need friends like you for comfort."

"Of course, Sir."

"She'll remember all of the feelings she had even if they are gone now, and when she realizes just who she nearly surrendered herself to she's going to be inconsolable. As it will take some time to set herself right again, I expect you to keep her focused... try and get her focused on the classes you two will be teaching. You'll be starting the day after tomorrow if I remember correctly."

"Yes, Sir."

"None of this 'Sir' business from you, Harry, unless you're attending my class. Outside of the dungeons, we are both Professors and therefore equals, eh?"

"Yes, Sir."

"Yes, _what?_"

"Yes... Horace."

"Thank you, Harry. Now, if you don't mind, I have some students to interrogate. Good day to you all."

After silently keeping watch over Hermione's sleeping form for five more minutes, Ron took a seat on the next bed over and pulled out a travel sized chess set.

"Fancy a game, mate?"

"Not going to lunch? You've still got forty minutes before class, you know." Harry was next to Ron leaving Usagi to float across Hermione's bed and get a good view of the three of them.

"I've graduated to a soup ladle now, I think. I can tell you don't want to leave her just yet... and so we won't either."

"Thanks Ron."

"I can always get Dobby to sneak me something in the halls, anyway."

"He'll do that?" Ron snorted.

"You've got two loyal house elves, mate. They'll do anything you ask them to do. Who's the dim one now, eh?"

Thirty-seven minutes later, Ron timed his chess victory to coincide with their need to head off to class.

* * *

"Are you sure you want to? We could postpone or something..." Harry wanted to give her every option.

"Honestly, Harry. I'm not a baby. Yes, it hurts. Yes, I really want to kill the little ferret, but I also want to get on with my life and this is the best way to do that. I hope that tonight will just wash away the taint." Hermione wasn't backing down.

She couldn't believe she had desperately loved Draco Malfoy earlier in the day. If the boy weren't currently being interrogated by his Head of House, there might have been a serious incident. It was only her equal love for Harry that kept her from sneaking off to find the Slytherin boy and giving herself to him days ago. She shivered in revulsion at the thought.

"What about you then?" Harry had turned to Ginny. He didn't plan for tonight to be an emotional experience for two witches, but then this was planned out weeks ago.

"In for a knut, in for a sickle, Harry. Come on already... I've been wanting you to do this with me forever now. This had to happen and you know it.." Ginny held Harry's gaze for a moment longer before finding the floor tiles to be especially interesting near her feet.

"Well, alright then." Harry looked at the two of them one last time before turning to do what only he could.

_§Open!§_

Behind Harry the rest of Dumbledore's Army, two martial artists and two ghosts tried not to shudder as Hogwarts' resident parseltongue revealed the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets.

"Brooms out!" Almost thirty Nimbus 2000's and Harry's own Firebolt expanded to make Pleasantly Moaning Myrtle's old haunt a lot cozier that it should have been. "Remember, not too fast down the tunnel. I'll be tossing out some bluebell flames every so often so hopefully you won't all need your own lumos spells. If it's at all like I remember down there, expect to cast some air freshening spells and some cleaning spells at the other end. Everybody ready?"

The assembled group nodded.

"Can I go down first?" It was Ranma who spoke out first.

"It's kind of a nasty pipe... and dark as pitch to boot."

"Pleeeeaaaaasse?" Ranma's puppy dog eye's were worthless as a guy, so he didn't even try them.

"Fine, have at it."

"Great! Can you give me a kickstart, Shamps?"

The curvy purple haired amazon was eager to comply. With a crowd of curious onlookers, Shampoo got behind Ranma and lashed out with a snap-kick right to the center of the ki master's spine. He rocketed straight down the middle of the dark tunnel.

"WEEEEEeeeeeeee-e-e-e..e..e...e....e.....e.....e....."

"Bai bai!" Shampoo hopped into the dark tunnel, surfing down it's central slime trail with feline poise.

After muttering about crazy martial artists, Harry mounted his broom to began to decend. With Ginny providing the lead party's lumos, Harry and Hermione painted the side walls with bluebell falmes.

It didn't seem to take as long to traverse the entry tunnel as Harry expected and soon enough he was face to back with a glowing, red haired martial artist with a cat and a pile of clothes held to her chest.

"Your pipes are a bit leaky Harry. Might want to get some plumbers down here." Ranma's eyes carefully scanned every rock for faults and fissures. She didn't like what she saw. "It's a miracle you didn't die down here, Harry. Some parts of that ceiling are just barely hanging on as it is... unless, of course, you can magic it back together or something."

"That's exactly what I plan on doing." Harry threw two more bluebells, one to either side of the rockfall caused by Professor Lockheart's failed Obliviate, before pulling out the Scepter of Prissiness.

"Reparo." An unexpected round of applause built up behind Harry. It's not everyday that a Hogwarts student moves tonnes of rock in less than a second.

"Wow, Harry! When did you get so powerful? I bet even Dumbledore couldn't have done that." Parvati was the one to speak up. Sure she knew about the shield he threw up in Hogsmeade, but this was a simple reparo and not some exotic super-shieldspell.

"It's the scepter I'm borrowing from Usagi." He held it up for the twin witches and a few others to get a better look. As Harry's not the one to go about boasting and showing off toys, many D.A. member's really haven't gotten much of a chance to see the crystal power focus. "I can't get every spell to work, but this thing will more than double the power behind any spell that purifies, fixes or heals something. Often the power of my healing spells or shields goes up by several orders of magnitude. That's the effect of Lunar Avatar Magic for you."

Harry met the confused stare of a Ravenclaw. A smart one. Was there really a form of magic he knew better than Padma? Surely the world was going to end soon, right?

Before Hermione could launch into a lecture with supporting anecdotes from Usagi, the resident Lunar Avatar, Harry hopped back on his Firebolt and led everyone through the tunnels to the next set of doors.

"Oh... my... gawd! Look at the size of those emeralds!" Lavender absolutely loved the inner doors.

"Fair warning, everyone. I have to open this one the same way as I did the door upstairs." At Harry's proclamation, Colin Creevey put his fingers in his ears. His girlfriend slid one hand through his back in a ghostly caress; Myrtle had as much reason to fear and hate the noise as anyone.

"Can we fetch the snakes' eyes, first Harry?"

Harry looked at the jewels, then to Lavender and then back to the jewels. The snakes still looked as alive to him now as they did when he was twelve. Mind you, they looked a bit bigger back then, but he had done some growing since he was twelve.

"I don't think that's a good idea Lavender. Maybe you can get your boyfriend's cursebreaker brother to come down here one day just to make sure they're not warded or something."

As Lavender began to whisper sweet jewel encrusted nothings into Ron's ear, Harry hissed again.

_§Open!§_

As the stone serpents parted and the wall opened for Harry, a small rush of air came through the doors.

"Hmmmm. Not nearly as odious as I expected, really." Harry was sniffing the air.

Surely there would be some stench as a thousand-odd year old great snake rots in the moist, cavernous main chamber, right?"

"Errrrrr..." Harry looked behind himself to see who made the odd noise.

"What?" Only the slack jawed stares of nearly thirty friends and defense students greeted his question.

Harry turned back to the Chamber of Secrets laid bare. It was cavernous, dimly lit and had the look of a slightly flooded greek or roman temple devoted to snakes.

"You're right. It's not quite as big as I remember. Would you all please light the place up some before getting to the other end?" Harry hopped back onto his broom and turned to Ginny. "Come on, Gin. Let's go. We need to say hi to old Salazar."

Ginny's eyes, when he met them, were suspiciously bright.

"Can I ride with you Harry? Please?" She was already shrinking her Nimbus. Harry nodded.

Less than a minute later, Harry set down at the feet of Salazar Slytherin's great stone monument. The mouth was still open, but no basilisk was in sight. He'd have to ask the Headmaster about that later, but tonight, he had Ginny Weasley to take care of.

At a nod from Harry, Hermione effectively cut the Boy-Who-Comforted out of tonight's lesson plan and began to outline tonight's goals. Ranma began to heat up some water for her cat. Hermione and the members of the D.A. spent the next hour and a half practicing broom-to-broom and ground-to-broom combat from every angle while getting helpful hints and lessons from two combat hardened fighters who didn't need brooms to fly between walls and columns. Even Usagi seemed to have a helpful idea or two after she started trading monster-fight stories with Ranma and Shampoo.

Harry spent the whole time sitting between Salazar's feet, tightly holding the witch who fell asleep crying on his shoulder. Harry wanted to cry too, but he wouldn't, not in front of the others.

Much later, after everyone was done for the night and safely back in their dorms and behind privacy wards, Harry broke down in front of Usagi. Just as she had at the springs of Jusenkyo, Usagi cooed and whispered and gently stroked the boy who'd come to mean so much to her. This time it meant so much more to him. This time he understood every word.

**Chapter End**

**Dirty Omake/Alternate Scene – Welcome to the Club**

Mid November to December 1996

-click-

Harry stepped away from the Room of Requirement's current door and into the warm and inviting atmosphere of a private library. The space seemed to have several rows of bookshelves on either side of a reading area that was decorated with a central fireplace, padded chairs, a couch and bearskin rugs.

Hermione looked up from her current perch in one of the chairs while Luna hummed and warmed herself at the fire, not bothering to look back.

The whole room was tastefully decorated in burgundy and golds with nary a hint of neon yellow or rainbow polka-dots anywhere. Must be Hermione's work.

"Ah, there you are." Hermione set down a copy of Olsen's Book of Standard British Birds, and turned to face her guest. "Usagi and I have a request."

'Uh, oh.' Harry instantly remembered the last time Hermione and Usagi agreed on a request. Sometimes he would sneak off with his pensive to relive the moment. He always felt better… more relaxed… when coming back out of that memory.

He sat down in the middle of the couch while alternately keeping an eye on Hermione's front and Luna's back.

Hermione stood up and closed to within two steps of Harry, but came short of actually sitting next to him as she seemed about to. Hesitantly, Hermione looked over her shoulder at the dirty blonde near the fire before turning her gaze back to Harry.

"You see Harry… Usagi and I have been getting to know Luna a lot better since the start of term, and, were it not for the whole House separation issue, I'm quite certain that she and I could have been the very best of friends. I certainly wouldn't have tolerated any of that bullying that seems to get by Cho in the Ravenclaw dorms. Aside from the 'being saved by Harry Potter' angle, I've got loads more in common with Luna than with Ginny and _she's_ the only girl I'm even remotely close to in Gryffindor Tower as you well know."

Hermione gave up the struggle and sat down thigh to thigh with Harry. In the back of Harry's mind, the part not burning at the touch of a witch so close that he can feel her breath in and out, he noticed that Luna had stopped humming.

"I don't doubt you one bit, 'Mione," Harry looked at Hermione but clearly talked loud enough for Luna to hear. "Luna's a wonderful friend... and she's more courageous than most of Gryffindor, so I can only guess at how brilliant she must be to have gotten into Ravenclaw instead... _and_ she's shown me far more loyalty than most Hufflepuffs." Harry thought he may have heard a snif from Luna's direction, but it could have just been the hissing and popping of a rolling fire.

"You... you make it so easy Harry."

Harry was surprised by Luna's statement. So was Hermione, apparently, because she seemed to come to a quick decision. She patted Harry on his leg and got up. Harry's... not quite so bushy haired as before friend turned and placed a feather soft kiss on his lips.

"I'll just leave you to it, then." Hermione re-oriented herself to Luna, who seemed to be smiling at Harry now even if there was one tear track sliding down her cheek. "I'll see the two of you at breakfast."

With a nod and a turn, Hermione left the Room of Requirements. Luna began a slow circuit of the reading area, paying attention to the details of a room that didn't really exist.

"You treat me like family. You make me feel loved. You make it easy for me to be Luna instead of Looney. Did you know that my things aren't going missing as often as they used to anymore?"

Harry shook his head.

"Well, they're not. Frieda's not smoking as much as she used to, so thanks for that." At Harry's confused expression, Luna continued. "She's my guardian angel, Harry. The little thefts were never serious, but they never let up. It was annoying the hell out of Freida. She was going through cigarettes at a phenomenal rate by the end of last year."

The blonde Ravenclaw stopped her room inspection and sat right in the middle of the rug at Harry's feet. She pulled her wand out from behind her ear and began to twirl it between her fingers.

"Hermione and Usagi and I really have been good friends since summer. We even talk Girl Talk together. It's been years since… and I owe it all to you, Harry. We three girls all have you in common." Luna motioned for Harry to join her on the floor.

Harry looked at the bearskin rug and the witch sitting atop it. They both looked really inviting. Hermione obviously approved for some reason, but was Usagi really okay with this… whatever it was they were doing? Teenaged wizard or not, Harry was going to wait for a clear sign of Usagi's approval before letting his lower brain get the better of him tonight. He moved onto the rug immediately in front of Luna and sat with his legs crossed.

"So… does my guardian angel have a name too?" He ran his hand through the rug only inches from Luna's hand, but didn't touch her just yet. Luna smiled.

"I was leaning towards Bruce at first, but Frieda tells me that his name is Luke." Luna giggled. "She told me all about him, but I've never seen any muggle- sorry, non-magical- movies so I don't really know who this Skywalker chap is he named himself after."

The young witch pulled something out from behind her other ear. It looked like a hand rolled cigarette.

"What… er, what's that?" Luna held up a finger. Okay, he could wait.

Harry watched Luna put on end of the cigarette between her lips, with a quick flick of her wand, there was a small flame to light up with. Luna brought flame to paper before breathing deeply and holding the smoke in for twenty seconds or so. She also held her hand rolled creation out to Harry, who took it gingerly, not quite knowing what to do with it. Twin streams of smoke shot out of Luna's nostrils.

"Hermione abstained sighting some non-magical law or other, but Usagi was keen to try." Harry sat confused for a moment.

"Oh, we forgot to show you!" As Harry watched, a golden crescent moon appeared on Luna's forehead for a second before retreating again. "Usagi get's to see what Neville's cannabis harvest is like and, in exchange, I get the same lesson you and Usagi gave Hermione before getting on the express! Win-win, don't you think?"

Luna plucked the joint out of Harry's hands and took another deep breath before handing it back. As curiosity was beginning to get the better of him, Harry finally took a hit. Completely unprepared for the feeling of smoke filled lungs, Harry spent the next thirty seconds trying to cough them out. Luna cackled before hopping in the poor boy's lap and offering him another hit.

"Come on, Harry… join me! I want to see if it'll really make sex better." Luna's eyes were sparkling and her smile threatened to split her head in half. "Not that I would know one way or the other, but I'm willing to find out!"

Hours later… or was it? Harry couldn't really tell at the moment. What? Anyway, Harry hoped that sometime after his brain started working normal like again the, um… what was he trying to do again? Oh! He really should ask the girls why that moon thingy kept fading in and out like Luna was some kind of hippy lamp or something. Maybe having two girls share a weed fueled body during a passionate bearskin rug shagging was, like, pushing the edge or something.

Harry was really mellow. 'My God, but Luna's skin felt incredible!... …I'm hungry.'

Hermione checked up on the two in the very early AM to send them discreetly back to their dorms and to banish the room. Those two did seem phenomenally happy. Maybe Hermione _should_ ask Luna more about Neville's gardens.

**End Dirty Omake/Alternate Scene**

**Reviewers:**

**EspyLacopa – **I'm not sure where he got the idea... Albus could have tweaked the recipes himself.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** I'm looking forward to Ranma's interactions as well. I nearly forgot what kind of chaos he should be able to bring to the plate – the very stuff which makes Pluto wary of him.

**Deviate Fish –** The foursome is incomplete, but it is a noble goal to strive for and may yet see fruition. Patience.

**nxkris –** It's almost a pity I got rid of Snape right before bringing Ranma in. That would have been so much fun. Maybe they will still meet, but I'm not sure on that count.

**Fire From Above –** Next chapter should be about Professor Potter and his new arch-nemesis. Should be fun stuff.

**delta waves – **Harry will plan on spending much of the break in Japan. With Pluto and with Harry's desire to master long distance apparition, the commute shouldn't be so bad anymore.

**WhiteElfElder –** I don't believe I've ever seen a story where a Jusenkyo curse was activated by Love Juices. Could be a plot in and of itself there.

**Kodachi –** Thank you. The complication story has been ratcheting up and this story is getting harder to write, but I shall not fall. I swear on my- wait, I don't have any magic. Damn.

**Jokulhaup –** The reverse innuendo just fell into my lap, lucky! I really hadn't been planning that until I wrote about Albus handing the chest over. It just snowballed.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** I was running out of innuendo by the end there, so someone had to interrupt before Hermione spotted the pearl necklace. Luna's got dibs on that one anyway.

**uo-chou –** I didn't explain as Ranma's description to Harry of how he would go about it actually worked. I just pre-explained that one much earlier in the story. I suppose I could have someone ask him how he did it to get a brief recap...

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** Harry is slated for another interview or two. With the public rumors and confusion about Harry in canon, I'm going with the idea that most of Magical England wouldn't really understand/believe a Jusenkyo curse unless Professor Granger got out the charts and illustrations for a public lecture tour.

**Jimm –** He was due at-or-before Christmas Holidays, but he found enough money for plane tickets and I got bored keeping him out of the loop.

**Isis the Sphinx –** I have the Martial Artist Tank, a Battle Mage, a White Sorceress Healer... where is a ranged weapons specialist to fill out this traditional questing group? A sniper or pilot would be good.

**Rubel –** I've seen other HP/SM crosses, but it's still not a heavily overdone area. At least, I don't think it is. My daughter has been showing me her Warriors/InvaderZim cross over ideas recently. Awesome, if only she could spell worth a crap. She must be Daddy's little girl after all, as I was the same way at ten.


	6. Give Me an O

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Six: Give Me an O**

November 6th, 1996

BLAARRRRGGGGHHH!

Assistant Professor Hermione Granger was on her hands and knees in the Defense Against the Dark Arts Assistant Professor's office, heaving her guts out. Assistant Professor Harry Potter was kneeling down just behind her right arm, holding Hermione's hair to keep his best friend from getting the sick all over her bush- curly brown locks. To Hermione's left, Dobby was patiently banishing her breakfast as soon as it hit the floor. Floating in front of the far wall of the office, Usagi was trying very hard not to laugh.

BLLLLAARRGGHH –ACK- _-COUGH-_

"Is the Great Harry Potter Sir's Missy 'Mione needing a potion from Healer Pomfrey's office? Dobby can get one! Dobby knows where they are!"

"Perhaps a calming draught and something to settle her stomach, Dobby." Harry moved to hold back Hermione's hair with one hand so that he could pull out a wand.

POP

With the elf gone Harry transfigured two sheets of parchment from their new desk into a bucket and a chalice of cool water. Silently putting the items in front of his best female friend, he watched her clean out her mouth for a couple of minutes. After another quick POP in and out, Dobby had delivered two potions and a note from Madam Pomfrey.

"Listen to this, 'Mione," Harry had the note from the school healer in his hand, "Pomfrey says that McGonagall, Vector, Lupin and Snape all became physically ill right before their first class. There is even a rumor that it happened to Dumbledore as well."

Hermione quickly swallowed the anti-nausea potion. After a grimace, she picked up the calming draught and emptied it's vial as well. Harry wordlessly handed her the water chalice again when she coughed a couple of more times.

"Thank you, Harry. I feel –cough- I feel better now." The nervous witch rose to her feet and gave Harry a strained smile. "It's just a bit bigger than starting the D.A., isn't it?"

"I don't know, 'Mione. We're doing this above board while the D.A. was illegal from start to finish last year." Harry gave her a hug before moving to the office door. "If you're ready then I'd better let them in, yeah?"

Hermione hesitated before nodding.

"I can get you Lunar Disguise Pen! It not too late!" Usagi called from behind Hermione causing the girl to turn around.

"I just couldn't! It would feel like cheating." Hermione did appreciate the offer, but she wasn't about to rely on a magical crutch like the tool Usagi had explained to her not half an hour ago. Magically receiving the knowledge and physical appearance necessary to perform one's task went against her work ethic. She only accepted using the memory transfer technique because it was both vital to getting a staff position and headmaster approved.

"Come on you two. I'll go open the door while you get all respectable looking at the Professor's desk." With that, Harry slipped through the door between their D.A.D.A. office and the adjoining classroom.

Seconds later, Hermione followed him through the door as Usagi passed through the wall next to her.

Harry stepped up to the main door leading out to a hallway full of eighteen Fourth Year Slytherins and Ravenclaws and placed his hand on the latch. He turned one last time to see a tense witch and a happy ghost looking back in his direction. Harry gave them his best smirk and a wink before opening the door to step through.

Halfway through the door, Harry saw motion at the edge of his vision. Instincts honed from years of dodging schoolboys, bludgers, hexes and angry snake-faced bastards caused him to drop to his knees and whip both wands out of their holsters. As the blurry something spattered across the classroom door above him, twin silent Protegos snapped into place around Harry.

"Oooooohhhhhhhhhh…." Several of his new students seemed to be quite impressed by the display.

"Hold still!" Harry barked his command to the class.

Black hair and green eyes turned left and right looking for more signs of attack. Only after Harry had a good idea of the situation did he look back to the door. Hermione was leaning over what appeared to be a pie crust lying face down on the floor, cream filling ran in lines across the face of the door.

"A cream pie, Har- Professor Potter. Not transfigured." Hermione caught herself before she could fully say 'Harry'. Professors were supposed to maintain their professional demeanor in front of their students even if said students were only two or three years younger than the professors in question.

"Thank you, Professor Granger." Harry dropped both shields but held onto his wands. He then began to slowly walk up and down the line of quiet students stopping at one in particular.

"Miss Greengrass. What was the most important lesson that Fake Professor Moody taught two years ago?" Harry's sort-of-sister seemed to ponder his question for a few seconds.

"Constant vigilance, Professor?" Harry stared into Astoria's eyes. There was something there… something that reminded him of the twins. Something that said 'No sir I didn't throw a pie at you honest' without meaning it.

"Five points to Slytherin, Miss Greengrass." Harry looked over his class one more time. "Everyone inside the classroom please. Take your seats."

Harry watched his first class step through the door as Hermione banished the pie from both floor and door face.

Over the next five minutes, Fourth Year Ravenclaw and Slytherin students settled in their seats and called out as Hermione took roll. The two Assistant Professors had already worked out that Harry would be the one to stay on his feet for most of the class so that he could be amongst the students during practical demonstrations. Hermione would be responsible for any lecture material, written tests, the roll and any other traditional authority bits as they were what really got her knickers wet. When the last name was called and the last student chimed in, Hermione nodded to Harry.

"Brilliant. Okay, class… just outside the door, we saw an effective demonstration of constant vigilance. When the Death Eater Barty Crouch Junior taught here, pretending to be Alastor Moody, he did manage to cover some important lessons. Can anyone tell me if he taught your class about the Unforgivables? Demonstrations and all?"

Hands came up. At least they were treating him like a Professor now rather than a target. Harry pointed to one of the Ravenclaw boys. Something Wadell… Harry couldn't quite remember his first name.

"He did Professor. He cast all three Unforgivables on spiders and cast the Imperious Curse on every student."

"As you may remember, the Unforgivables cannot be blocked by magical shields. This does not mean that Unforgivable curses always land on target. Today, we are going to start by practicing how to dodge spells and then we'll try using the summoning charm to get something you can block an Unforgivable with. Any question so far?"

Silence greeted Harry's question.

"Dobby?"

POP

"Dobby is here! What does the Great Professor Lord Harry Potter Sir wish of Dobby?" Laughter greeted the elf's title for their new Professor. It didn't matter, Harry told himself. He'd be getting the last laugh soon enough.

"Get me cream pies. More than a hundred of them. I want them to be green or orange and I want them stacked up around 'Mione's desk." Hermione looked over to Harry with a disapproving frown. They'd clearly have to get used to calling each other Professor.

"Yes, Sir! Professor Missy Granger shall be swimming in pies, Professor Lord Harry Potter Sir!" More laughter exploded from the class.

POP

As the class continued to giggle and chuckle, Harry walked back up to Hermione's desk. He motioned for Usagi to join them in a bit of creative educational planning. Forty-five seconds later, they had a game plan and a quickly growing stack of pies. In that time, the students had almost forgotten that this was supposed to be a real class and were gossiping back and forth amongst each other. Perfect.

With a single swish of Hermione's wand, the classroom furniture obeyed its Professor's command and levitated to the side walls leaving only the surprised students sitting in their individual chairs on the floor.

"The lesson in dodging begins now! AVADA KEDAVERA!" Harry's roar stopped class chatter. Every student froze solid as the Chosen One held a green pie high in the air shouting words of death.

_**SPLAT **_

Astoria Greengrass died. 'Died' as in Harry's first throw was right on target and the pretty fourteen year old witch caught a green pie in the face.

"Crucio!" "Avada Kedavera!" Orange and green colored cream pies flew out from Professor's Potter and Granger as the creamy attack escalated.

_**SPLAT SPLAT **_

Usagi wanted to have fun too. She was quite surprised to hear Harry ask for her help in imitating all three Unforgivables. Being possessed was kind of like one of them, wasn't it?

"Imperio!" With that unusual battle cry, the Japanese ghost jumped into the only clean student left on the front row and possessed him.

"Avada Kedavera!" "Crucio!"

Usagi grabbed the half broken pie in Astoria's lap and twisted around in 'his' seat. A third salvo of Unforgivable desserts left the professor's desk on their way to student faces.

_**SPLAT SPLAT **_

"_I will have your energy!"_ Okay, so it's not exactly what the Imperiused victims of England might say, but Usagi's met thousands of possessed humans in Tokyo and they always said that. And you know what? It was kind of fun! She then drove the broken pie –_**SPLAT**_**- **right into the face of the girl behind her. _ "Your energy is mine!"_

_That_ girl screamed. With four of their class already 'dead' and three of them 'tortured', the rest of the class finally jumped out of their seats and began to dodge. Harry smiled. Now the real fun -er, lesson- could begin.

As Astoria tried to wipe pie filling off of her face with her bare hands and dodge fresh pies at the same time, she fumed. 'Harry Potter! You are sooooo gonna get it! My plan of Doom begins next weekend!'

* * *

"Reese's Cup." Called Harry as he and Hermione waited in the third floor corridor for access to the Headmaster's office.

The gargoyle sentry stepped aside for Harry and Hermione allowing them to answer their summons.

"So... where is Usagi again?" Harry was feeling a little down now that his Love had stepped away for the evening. He wouldn't normally have been so interested except for the fact that Usagi had been there for both of the day's D.A.D.A. classes and she clearly enjoyed helping teach the classes more than she liked taking them.

"Honestly. She's off with the other female ghosts for a poker night. I'm not sure how long it's going to be." Hermione also wasn't about to tell Harry that Usagi clearly stated the were having Strip Poker Night. She didn't think the boys in Hogwarts Castle could handle the knowledge that Usagi and Myrtle had taught the Grey Lady how to remove or change her clothes. Nearly Headless Nick has already been heard muttering the phrase 'Hot Lady of Ravenclaw'.

"Enter." Headmaster Dumbledore had, as usual, announced their arrival even before Harry's hand so much as graced the door to knock.

Upon entering, Harry immediately nodded to Albus and sat down in front of the Headmaster's desk. Hermione greeted Albus a bit more warmly and received a warm smile of thanks in return.

"Thank you both for agreeing to meet with me tonight. I have news of young Malfoy which will interest you both."

Harry ceased his study of the former Headmaster portraits and Hermione stopped mentally cataloging the various books on Albus's two visible bookshelves.

"When one student uses a love potion on another student, as you must know happens on average several times a year, there are different levels of punishment base on what potion it is. Most school level love potions only last a few hours at best and most of those only release inhibitions, much like whiskey and beer do. These are never more than a social embarrassment and... to my knowledge... no permanent relationships were ever forced with such potions even if more than one began with a little push. Now, sometimes a student will use something a bit stronger... something like what young Lord Malfoy used on Professor Granger." This speech was really the Headmaster's first declaration of the new school policy. It took the old man a while without the influence of his old lemon drops to realize that the old policy wouldn't have punished Malfoy for what he did nor would it have punished him for succeeding due to his social and blood statuses. Albus planned to update those codes quietly while hiding that the old codes were as prejudiced as they were.

"I hope you mean to say, Sir, that the punishment will be far harsher based on the possible effects." Harry was watching Hermione while listening to the Headmaster. He wanted to be able to give her the best possible support no matter how this talk went. "Let's not forget that he literally stole the heart of a member of your staff."

"There is that. Yes." Albus took off his glasses and began to wipe dust off one of the lenses. "If that were all there is to it, then Lord Malfoy would be expelled tonight. Alas, that is not the case."

"It's... It's because he's a pureblood Lord then. Isn't it?" Hermione was beginning to see where this was going. There must have been some flicker of emotion or twitch in her delivery because Harry's hand was immediately atop hers and the Headmaster's face changed from impassive to a little sad and regretful.

"That is part of it. As a pureblood Lord, like our dear Lord Potter, he is entitled to certain ancient protections within Magical English Law that I cannot revoke. There is also the risk that should Draco be free of school ties that he will immediately seek to serve the Dark Lord."

"But- but you said that he was like me. Does that mean that I have some right to bestow protection or something? I could make her a Potter somehow..."

Harry's anger at Draco and his love for Hermoine were pushing him to act. While this was a noble and useful instinct on the field of battle, it didn't help much in their current predicament. Hermione looked back at her Brave Knight, the Boy-Who-Was-More-Than-The-Chosen-One-To-Her and had to fight back tears at the thought that he still loved another more. Albus clearly saw the thoughts of both teens and sought to ease Hermione's pain. He would explain things to Harry so she didn't have to.

"Your prerogative for providing protection, Lord Potter, stops at one eligible maiden. Even then, you must make a claim for the one you seek to protect. You have in fact made such a claim by way of your Betrothal to the Crown Princess. In short, you cannot use the ancient codes of honor in defense of Hermoine."

"Well. That's it then? He gets away with it?" Harry's eyes were burning with an inner fire that Albus rarely saw in one so young. He simply had to do something before Harry did something he would... well, not regret... but be punished heavily for.

"He does not 'get away with it'. No. Lord Malfoy will be put on an in school suspension. His wand will be monitored by his Head of House and he shall effectively be under house arrest in a private dorm outside of his fellow Slytherins' reaches. All outside activities like Quidditch and Hogsmeade are forbidden to him."

Harry looked to Hermione, who seemed resigned. "What do you think?"

"I want to hex his bits off... but... I'll settle for not having to deal with him again." Hermione wasn't looking up. Harry figured that she wanted more than house arrest but knew she couldn't get it. "What's a muggleborn Professor to a pureblood Lord... even a student... in Magical England? Not what they should be. I know that well enough now. May we be excused, Headmaster?"

Albus nodded and both Assistant Professors got up from their chairs.

"I'll not tolerate another act of aggression on Malfoy's part, Headmaster. School rules or no, he will answer to me personally if he interferes with any of my family ever again." Harry stared down the Headmaster.

"Please, Harry. The right path may be hard to follow, but it must be followed if we are to keep our countrymen from falling to darkness." Albus may not be hopped up on the strongest drugs known to science and alchemy, but his moral compass still existed. It was even easier to read and a bit more accurate these days.

Harry paused at the door. As his hand was in hers, Hermione stopped and waited for what she hoped would be his last parting shot at the Headmaster.

"You once told me that the power I needed to defeat Voldemort was love. You were right, Headmaster. More than that, love is my right path, my light and my greater good. My heart tells me that I will see Usagi alive and that I will marry her... maybe one day soon. My heart tells me that you are a better man than you once were. But you know what? My heart also tells me that if Malfoy so much as touches Usagi or Hermione or Ginny or Luna in any way from now until the Sun grows cold then I will crush him. Good day, Sir."

With that, Harry turned back to the staircase and escorted his best friend to the Ravenclaw dorms. It was time to meet Padma Patil for their pre-arranged memory trade. Of course the witch in question wanted a little something in return... just a lesson or two on how to pull the memory trick herself.

"Harry? Did you- did you really mean that up there?" Hermione was mostly quiet on their stroll, but there was one thing she wanted to know for sure.

"Every bit! Was there something in particular you- errr... wanted to verify?" Harry rarely heard Hermione use that tone. It was much softer and more vulnerable than her usual confident no-nonsense ways.

"You implied that I was family. Are we family, Harry?"

"Yes we are." Harry finished his answer with a pull on Hermoine to get her arm in arm rather than just hand in hand. The rest of their trip to Ravenclaw Tower and then to Gryffindor Tower was quiet and warm and comfortable.

* * *

November 11th, 1996

Ron dropped into a chair in the D.A.D.A. classroom and and grumbled.

This was their class. Their. Class. Why'd Harry and Hermione go and mess everything up by going off and teaching the lower years. The two weren't at the last lesson and also made it clear that they weren't going to make it to this one either. At least he could distract himself with Lavender this year. Except that girlfriend or not, she still tended to sit next to Parvati in each class... well out of groping range.

"Bloody hell."

"Lanquage, Ron!" Ron turned to look for Hermione only to realize that it was Parvati's voice he heard.

"It's not the same, is it?" Lav-Lav and Pav-Pav looked at each other, the Indian girl wincing as she realized that her comment didn't help matters.

"Look on the bright side, Won-Won. No Snape and this Saturday is the make-up game for the match that got interrupted." Lav-Lav knew her Won-Won pretty well, not that he was the hardest person to read.

To cheer him up, she could do one of three things. She could appeal to his anti-Slytherin side ('No Snape'), she could appeal to his love of Quidditch (the make-up game) and she could appeal to his dick (lick lips, smile, wink). She did all three things. Ron thought about it for a moment before sitting a little straighter and giving his witch a big smile.

"You're right! And the Headmaster's none too shabby at teaching this class. Too bad Harry's teaching the younger years though... I'd much rather see him put the snakes in their place than see the old man do it." Ron was eating up Lavender's warm smile- until she wasn't smiling any more. She wasn't looking him in the face anymore either. No, she was looking just over his shoulder and so was Parvati.

"I'm sure that Professor Potter is doing quite well at teaching the younger students and I have no doubt that the D.A.... if you still call it that... the D.A. must also be in good hands." Ron sank into his seat as he heard the 'old man' speaking from right behind his desk. "Alas, he is not experienced enough in the subject to teach what needs to be taught at N.E.W.T. level."

Ron began to relax again due to the Headmasters grandfatherly gentle voice. His smile returned.

"That still does not excuse you for the 'old man' comment I'm afraid. Detention." Ron lost his smile again. "With Professor Potter and Professor Granger tonight." The smile was back.

Further back in the class, some snorted.

"And what, may I ask, is so funny Miss Greengrass?" Albus turned on the visibly flustered girl. How did he know it was her? "Detention for you as well... and yours shall also be with our Assistant Professors tonight."

Daphne seemed on the edge of making a comment but held her tongue, thus allowing the class to proceed.

"And now that I see we are all here on time, it is time to begin." Albus walked back to the front of the class and placed both hands on the desk where everyone could see them. "Can anyone tell me why the International Confederation of Wizards created the International Statute of Secrecy?"

Several students raised their hands. Albus singled out Padma Patil whom he was reasonably sure would deliver the textbook answer.

"The Statute, established in 1692, was introduced because of the widespread persecution of wizarding children by Muggles, the escalating attempts by Muggles to force witches and wizards to perform magic for Muggle ends, the escalating attempts by Muggles to force witches and wizards to teach them magic, the increasing numbers of witch-burning, the increasing numbers of Muggles being burned in mistake for witches, and the failure of Ministry of Magic Delegation to the Muggle King and Queen begging for protection under Muggle law." Padma replied, just as Albus predicted.

"Well researched Miss Patil. Five points to Ravenclaw. As is often the case in history though, what you find in your textbook isn't always the full story. Our ancestors were quite well protected during the Burning Times but the same cannot be said for wizards across the globe in other time periods. Can anyone give an example of a time when muggles were successful in a war against wizard kind?"

A wizard near the back of the classroom took offense.

"What idiocy is this? You can't mean to say that muggles are any kind of threat to us!" Draco Malfoy had taken the bearded Headmaster's bait.

"China, right?" Albus's eyes twinkled. He could close the trap on Draco after replying to Ron.

"Five points to Gryffindor, Mister Weasley." Ron puffed up in pride at seeing his girlfriend's surprise and approval.

"Surely you don't expect us to accept that? I don't believe it's possible, Headmaster." Draco thought he was being restrained with the level of disbelief present in his voice. He did manage to stop before claiming that the Dark Lord would wipe away all of the worthless filth who believed such lies.

"And what would you say, Mister Malfoy, if I told you that two muggles capable of defeating wizards were in this very room?" Albus's eyes began to twinkle.

Draco didn't deign to move his head as he had already scanned the room upon entering. He sneered while thinking through a suitable reply. Unfortunately for Draco, his reply was cut off when two young adults walked past him on either side and made their way to the Headmaster. Draco fought down the hairs standing on the back of his neck, refusing to believe it was anything more than mere inattention on his part. Surely muggles can't use Disillusionment Charms, can they?

"Class… I do hope you remember our unexpected guests from Halloween." Ranma and Shampoo both turned and waved to the class. Ron, Lavender, the Patil twins and Neville all smiled and waved back.

"Now one or two of you may have heard this story, as it was researched and presented by our own Assistant Professor Granger to a close group of friends this past summer. The last time Ancient China had wizards and witches in the same numbers that we have in Europe today was about three thousand years ago. The Shang Dynasty actually used dark wizard clans to great effect to keep muggle peasantry enslaved for centuries."

Draco and Pansy both smiled warmly at this. One could always dream...

"Then, in 1046 BC, Zhou Wu Wang was able to overthrow the Shangs and kill their king Di Xin by enlisting elite martial warriors known as 'ki adepts', who use life energy instead of magic."

To either side of Dumbledore, Ranma and Shampoo both released ki into their auras. While Albus continued undaunted, his students all hissed in shock when the front half of their classroom was bathed in brilliant white and blue coronas of power radiating from the martial artists.

"The Zhou Dynasty set about hunting down the dark wizarding families with the help of these ki adepts and managed to kill off almost all of them. What remains of the once great dark wizarding clans is just a handful of poorly trained wizards and witches along with a rather large squib population. This extermination didn't do anything to the magical plants and animals of China or the ancient written histories and magical scrolls. The conquering warriors were quite happy to keep those records... though I don't know if they're willing to share with the rest of us?"

Albus made his last comment into a question and aimed it at Shampoo. The girl seemed to think about it before shaking her head a and blowing a raspberry in his direction.

"Drat... anyway, the ki adepts had some differences of opinion with the Zhou's and went their own ways. This formed the tribes of Chinese Amazons. Shampoo of the Joketsuzoku is representative of a young and strong warrior: A ki adept."

"And what is this supposed to prove? That Chinese wizards were too weak to handle a few ruffians with swords?" Pansy was in a huff. Her pureblood upbringing still rebelled against the idea that a muggle would be allowed to step foot inside of Hogwarts, much less be given food and lodging during the school year.

Albus lost some of his eye twinkle, but continued on with the lesson. He and his two non-magical assistants had discussed at length the best way to prove their worth without harming students or giving away hidden abilities to the Dark Lord. The Headmaster nodded once to Shampoo.

Shampoo slowly held up three white masks, one at a time, and set them on the Professor's desk. Every student knew a Death Eater's mask when they saw one. Ranma spoke up.

"Jusenkyo Valley's a quiet part of western China that's changed little in the past thousand years or so. Earlier this summer, some of your dark wizards visited the valley looking for a good friend of mine: Harry Potter. Harry was already an honored guest of the local inhabitants, so when four masked wizards approached in the middle of the night and tried to take him by force..." Ranma looked back to Shampoo.

The purple haired Joketsuzoku warrior held up a fourth and final mask. A silver one. Draco's face went white before quickly flushing dark red.

"They failed." Ranma's lecture was over. Shampoo returned her warrior sisters' trophies to… wherever it was that she got them from. Surely there wasn't any room to hide them in those tight, tight pants of hers.

As Shampoo pulled a Chinese broadsword out of thin air and began to sharpen it with a stone similarly pulled from the ether, Albus retook center stage. While Albus was still quite somber due to the message he was trying to impart to his more difficult students, he did find the time to appreciate Miss Shampoo's rather exceptional ability to pull massive objects from thin air without the help of magic. Ki-folding, she called it. And she isn't even a master yet… remarkable. Perhaps if you had asked one of the wizards in the class, they would have told you it was remarkable what she could push in and out of her spectacular body. They might want to ask her for closer demonstrations.

"If you only learn one thing in your class today, let it be this: the International Statute of Secrecy was put in place to ensure that wizards do not anger the general muggle population to the point where we are hunted to extinction. I dare say that modern muggle advances will make them far more effective witch hunters than they once were."

The Sixth Year N.E.W.T. level D.A.D.A. class was given a minute before Albus had them all stand with wands in hand and run a drill which seemed to be the exact opposite of what Harry's and Hermione's first class had to do; they were all to hex Ranma and Shampoo as much as they could for as long as their magic held out.

Not once. Not once did any hex, curse or other magical attack come close to hitting either martial artist in the half hour that they were given from ranges of three to ten meters. Not once.

Draco was beside himself with rage. 'Here they are… two of the very scum that took Father's life… and they were taunting me!' The young Slytherin prince received several disappointed looks from the Headmaster when his curses began to turn dark in nature but the old bastard let their game continue. 'Clearly it was a setup. The fools were lucky. That's all. No muggle could beat a noble pureblood Lord. They would learn this lesson sooner rather than later if I have anything to do with it.'

* * *

"Inmates Weasley and Greengrass reporting for duty, SAH!" Ron snapped to attention before Harry. Daphne flinched at his odd display. It wasn't something a proper pureblood would do... whatever it was.

"Didn't know you knew anything about The War, Ron. Did you get to watch old telly?" Harry asked the question but Hermione also seemed keen to hear the answer.

Ron seemed quite pleased with himself. "Well, about a mile down the lane from Luna's house were these old muggles in the know that we used to talk to on occasion. I did get to see a bit of telly once before Dad got too close and broke it trying to talk to the people in the box."

Ron only picked up his explanation after the chuckles died down. Marvin the Mad Muggle might have competition in Weasley the Wacky Wizard.

"Well after the telly went dead, the old muggles began telling stories about the Second Great War and Krauts and Jerries and such. I didn't know what they were talking about at first, but then I was kinda little then, so they told me some more stories. Was the Second Great War worse than Voldemort, you think?" Harry and Hermione looked at each other, smiles gone.

"Ron? How many wizards have the Death Eaters killed? Muggles? A rough guess would be fine..." Harry set the purebloods up knowing Hermione would have the final tallies on World War Two available at a moments notice.

Ron actually looked over to Daphne for a moment; whether it was for help or sympathy, Harry couldn't tell.

"Thousands I suppose... I don't rightly know. It was bad."

"And how many died because of Grindelwald, you recon?"

Ron stayed silent, but Daphne seemed to be paying attention now.

"Mum told me at least thirty thousand wizards and witches on the continent died. Could have been more like fifty thousand."

Harry went white, but if Ron and Daphne thought the magical loss of life did it, they were wrong.

"You really don't understand how many muggles died in the Second World War, do you?" Harry had a sad, pitying tone in his voice.

"Was it worse? Twice that?" Harry flinched. "More than twice?"

"Ron. Between Nineteen thirty-seven and Nineteen forty-five, over twenty-five million military personnel died... around fifty million civilians died in the same amount of time. Almost two thousand million people were touched by the war in some way." Hermoine looked at the shell shocked faces of her pureblood friends. "It was common to have eight to ten thousand soldiers dying every day which means twice that many civilians. You really didn't know did you? I'm sorry, Ron."

Silence reigned for a short eternity. Harry, being the one to pull out of his introspective state first, chose to get things moving.

"Right. Brooms." Nearly thirty miniature brooms were pulled out of pockets and expanded at the touch of a wand. "Daphne... this one's yours now."

The Slytherin girl came out of her horrified trance when a Nimbus Two-thousand was thrust into her hands.

"Oh, and welcome to the D.A." Harry turned from the thoroughly confused and disturbed witch to a sink on the wall behind him.

_§ Open § _

Harry hissed at the sink, causing Daphne to let out a little yelp. The rest of the D.A. behind her would have joked at her reaction were it not for the unusually dark muggle history lesson they just received.

Ten minutes later, Daphne found herself on a broom hovering over stone floors in the Chamber of Secrets. If it weren't for the fact that Dumbledore still refused to discuss the missing Basilisk, Harry would hazzard a guess that she was the first Slytherin to enter the chamber since Tom did in his earlier days. Perhaps Dumbledore sent Snape down with Fawkes? Still, to have less than fifty people enter a secret chamber in the last thousand years made this really special and they all knew it. Not once did any club member ask to go back up to the Room of Requirement.

"Harry?" The unusually humble Slitherin girl almost whispered as she watched Harry look over his group. D.A. or not, this was more Potter's army than Dumbledore's and they all knew it.

"Yeah, Daphne?" Harry looked over Hermione and Ginny participating in a game of flying Spell-Tag with a handful of the others. Air to air combat was rare in the magical world, but it happened. 'Mione was getting a lot better. Once or twice, Harry was sure that he caught her smiling during the high energy game. He finally made a real broom lover out of her. Brilliant!

"You should know that Astoria's plan is set for this weekend after the game." That got Harry's full attention. "The idea is that you will either be drunk with victory or weakened by defeat... either way, you should be a bit more vulnerable than normal so we're going to do a little crowd control before getting Peeves to pinch your scepter."

"Peeves? He'll help you?" Harry was surprised. Did the poltergeist actually support a dark agenda?

"We had to trick and bribe him into it, but yeah. Anyway, we get you in an ambush and then it's red lights and darkness for you until you wake up again in the Slytherin Common Room." Harry and Daphne kept watching the game of tag, but Usagi, Ginny and Luna all stopped to listen in on some good intelligence reporting from deep within the enemy camp. "The idea is we tease you a bit, but then you pull out that second wand of yours that Astoria and I tell everyone you aren't carrying and you get back that Scepter of yours and do a light magic wave like the one you let off in Diagon Alley."

"Why would I do that?" Harry really only had half his mind on the plan.

"You'll be in the same room as future Death Eaters and dark aligned pureblood students Harry! You can get them all to turn light like the Headmaster's always wanted!" Daphne seemed really excited about her little sister's Master Plan of Doom now. Astoria and Daphne recently added a dash of real doom to it... doom for the dark aligned students anyway.

"What do you mean? Surely I can't brainwash all of them. I got Dumbledore in the Alley because he was right there in front of me. Snape too."

"Didn't you read the Prophet last weekend? The prison-break article?" The other girls wanted his explanation too. Even Usagi knew about it.

"Sorry. Hermione and I have been on a really tight schedule what with our own classes and then the teaching and the team and the D.A.-"

"Which you should really rename, by the way. P.A. is much more accurate, don't you think?"

"Er, thanks, Luna. But really, it's a bit late for that... Anyway, I haven't seen the paper recently."

Daphne took up the banner again. She didn't know what it was about this group, but she just felt like part of something much bigger than what her life was turning out to be otherwise.

"Well, the story goes that a dozen Death Eaters attacked the Ministry holding cells of Death Eaters still imprisoned since the Second Battle of Diagon Alley. That's what it's being called now, you know. So, the Death Eaters attack and slaughter a great many aurors and Ministry workers who were caught completely by surprise and they get all the way to the holding cells and you'll never guess what happened next!" Harry was impressed. Every second she went on was another kick higher on the excitement scale for Daphne. He doubted anyone outside of her own family or closest friends have ever seen this face. "I'll tell you what happened next! The prisoners refused their escape portkeys and counter-attacked the Death Eater attack squad! Caught them completely by surprise the other way! It seems that _SOMEONE,_ Mister Potter, someone blasted them with enough love based magic that they recanted their old ways and didn't want to go back to the Dark Lord! True, over thirty Ministry employees and three of the original prisoners were dead when all was said and done, but only one of the attacking Death Eaters made it out in one piece. All because of _YOU!"_

Harry was shocked. Daphne was glowing with pride. Ginny was pissed.

"Bloody hell, Harry! Not another one!" This got both Harry and Daphne looking at her with matching shock and embarrassment. Luna tried and failed to choke back her laughter. Usagi too.

"Just how many witches have you slept with before coming to me, anyway? Well not this time, Potter! Not this time! I demand that you make a magically binding oath to the effect that you will shag me before you so much as look at another witch. I will be sooooooo angry if I find you so much as snogging Daphne... a bloody Slytherin... before coming to me you... you... you prat!"

Harry wasn't looking at Ginny's rage or Luna and Usagi's laughter or the two dozen odd D.A. members who had dropped what they were doing to watch one of the most spectacular social spectacles of their lifetime. He was looking into Daphne's eyes. A split second later, Daphne's face went deep red and her eyes began to jump around to anything, anything but Harry.

"Bloody hell... it was you wasn't it?" He whispered the lines, but the acoustics were uncanny good in the chamber and just about everyone could hear him crystal clear.

"You and who else? Was it Davis? Please say it wasn't Parkinson." Was this a dirty thing or a Slytherin spy thing?... everyone wanted to know.

"I-I don't kn-know what you mean Harry." Panic! Panic! Panic! Abort! "Tracy and I n-never did anything to you! Really!"

"So it _was_ Tracy! But why did... did... oh..." Harry finally saw his audience.

"Why did they what Harry? Why did they ambush you after a D.A. meeting last year and shag your brains out? Why did they take your virginity?" Oh, Luna... you sure know when to drop a bomb on someone, don't you?

"Fuck! Who haven't you shagged Harry? Am I the only one?" Ginny's skin matched her hair now. The resemblance to Mollywobbles was unmistakable.

"It not so bad, Ginny. You know all of Harry's girls now I think." Usagi wanted to feel bad for the redhead, but she still thought Ginny was a raging bitch, so, not likely. "I think it seven now, or do I not count a full point because I am dead?"

Harry began to look around around the chamber at all his friends and allies with their mixed reactions of interest, pride, jealousy or dirty kinky interest and shuddered. Then he saw Luna again. The delightfully quirky Ravenclaw was taking a drag from an imaginary cigarette or something and blowing imaginary smoke at his face. She also winked suggestively in such a way as to make sure most everyone saw her performance. That girl is scary. Brilliant and scary just like Hermione. No wonder he feels close to Luna as well.

"Harry." The other Weasley in hearing range spoke up.

"Yeah, Ron?"

"Thanks for not shagging my sister, mate." Ron shifted uncomfortably on his broom when he saw Ginny's 'keep-out-of-my-business' face glaring back at him.

"Don't mention it, Ron." Harry flinched when Ginny's death glare was focused on him again. "Really don't mention it."

"I'm waiting for that oath, Harry." Was she serious? Harry just beat down the internal Godfather joke threatening to make itself known.

"It doesn't work that way Ginny."

"Let me out of here."

"Fine." Harry looked over to Hermione who nodded to Harry before turning to get everyone back to their practice.

Lavender whispered to Ron before giving him a little peck on the cheek and following the others out. She wasn't letting Ginny run off alone.

As three broomriders headed back to the second floor girl's loo, everyone else grudgingly followed Hermione's instructions while talking about the excellent drama they just saw. Bets were placed on just what would be common knowledge by tomorrow night. Harry the Gryffindor Golden Boy-Who-Lived lost his virginity to a Slytherin ice princess! No, two of them!

* * *

November 16th, 1996

"And another ten points for Ginny Weasley and Gryffindor!" Zacharias Smith's voice echoed over the roar of the crowd.

Sound was traveling quite well through the frigid air today. Early on in the game, Ginny turned herself into a human bludger and knocked Vaisey off his broom. The crack that accompanied her fist meeting his face could be heard in every corner of the stadium. Ouch.

The little redheaded hellion thought that a penalty shot on Ron by the replacement chaser was well worth her stress relief. Now if only Daphne Greengrass were on the chaser lineup...

_LET'S GO GRYFFINDOR, LET'S GO_ **-stomp stomp-** _LET'S GO __**-stomp stomp**_**-**

Thirteen girls in red and gold (plus one similarly attired ghost) bounced and wiggled, pom-poms waving, to entice the crowd and stir the fighting spirit of the high flying quidditch team in the skies above. Praise be to God for warming charms. Without them twenty-eight wonderful shapely legs (two of them see through) would not be on full display from ankle to upper thigh.

Needless to say, the Gryffindor House cheerleader squad was a stupendously monumental success. So successful were they in fact that Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff would both have to tempt some of their own girls back off of the Gryffindor team. Under Lavender's enthusiastic leadership, her chief trainer/lieutenant Usagi had set the standard by showing English witches a selection of routines that Minako taught the Inner Senshi in their down time.

Yes... Ami Mizuno can shake her pom-poms as well as any of them. She just chooses not to.

As soon as someone was jealous enough to enact rules banning cross house cheerleader squads, Padma Patil and Susan Bones would be courted heavily by their housemates to be new squad captains. To be fair, any girl now seen wearing a cheerleader outfit would be courted heavily. Speaking of...

"And yet another ten points for Ginny Weasley and Gryffindor! If neither the Slytherin team nor Harry Potter do anything remarkable in the next half hour or so then the ginger chaser will surely win this game single handed. Brilliant! And speaking of brilliant, how about a round of applause, Hogwarts, for the Gryffindor cheerleader squad?" Smith's request was met with more roars and whistles than any of Ginny's goals so far. "I must say that seeing girls from other houses on the squad does my... well not my heart, but it does a part of my body good. Miss Lovegood, I take back everything I've ever said about you. You are as pretty as you are intelligent and I humbly beg before the entire student body that you allow me to escort you to Hogsmeade during the next outing!"

"Mister Smith!"

"Sorry Professor McGonagall..." He didn't sound sorry. Not to anyone. There was a disturbance in the cheerleader line.

"Well anyway... from what I can see of Miss Lovegood from up here, I think that's a no." The crowd roared again.

About one hundred meters down the pitch at one end, Harry buzzed his keeper.

"Oy! Ron! Keep your eye on the game!" Busted! Ron did look a little sheepish.

"But Harry! She just looks so... tasty... waring that thing that Usagi and Hermione scrounged up. How do muggle blokes keep their mind on the game with _that_ down there just begging for a snog?"

"Simple, Ron. If you behave in the air and catch those quaffles, then Lav-Lav will let you misbehave in private at the victory party later tonight." Harry saw that Ron understood well enough, but it was like a law or something that he had to use crude dirty language to hammer the point home. "Catch Slytherin's quaffles now, seek Lavender's snitch tonight!"

"And if you beat me to Lavender's snitch I swear I'll rip your wedding tackle off!" Ron was down seven nil. He needed a point to get on the board.

"I swear on my bits and my magic, I've never shagged Lav-Lav nor do I plan to."

"Brilliant, mate... now catch that damn snitch before Ginny gets a bludger to the brain!" Ron's baby sister was out there all fragile and endangered and stuff. Never mind that she took out the best Slytherin chaser in a head on pass, she'll always be Ickle Gin-Gin to big brother Ronnikins.

"Yes, SAH!" And with that, Harry was off.

Fifteen minutes later, Harry's occasional quick looks at the cheerleaders payed off in spades when he spotted the snitch dodging between the girls' legs as they did a series of high kicks. Harry didn't bother trying to fake out Harper and instead just dove for the gold.

"What's this? Potter's diving full speed right at the cheerleaders! Careful, mate! Your snitch is the one with wings instead of legs!" Harry tried not to let the innuendo throw him off. Those who were paying attention to the announcer's chair saw McGonagall swat the Hufflepuff with a rather heavy looking tome. She may have transfigured it just for the occasion.

"Sorry Prof- but wait! Potter's after the snitch after all!" While some of the crowd had already seen it, now the full might of all four houses pushed their vocal chords to the limit. "The snitch has gone to ground near the witches in red and gold! It's zipping around too much for the girls to know which way to run. How will Potter catch the snitch without plowing through two or three witches is the question!"

Usagi saw Lavender and Parvati hop back a few steps each. Suddenly two objects seemed to be bearing down on her at high speed from different angles. She froze in place.

Harry caught the snitch.

"Oh that's just not cricket, Potter! You don't give a girl the business in front of a full crowd!"

Harry was frozen in place, fist firmly around the snitch. The winged one, that is... not Usagi's personal snitch though it looked like he had possession of that one too.

Harry's eyes slowly traveled up Usagi's body as hers slowly traveled down. As their gazes met they shared a feeling of utter social embarrassment. If Usagi were alive, Harry would be thrown in prison for that catch. Come to think of it, Usagi would have been in a lot of pain.

With a panicked squeak Usagi disappeared into thin air. Harry really wished he could pull the same trick, but all he could do was hold the snitch above his head for all to see his victory.

"Not that we didn't already know, but Harry has the snitch. That ends our second attempt at a Gryffindor-Slytherin match with a 390 to 80 victory to the lions of Gryffindor. This is Zacharias Smith telling you that a party isn't a party unless the cheerleaders are in uniform when they show up. OW! Sorry Professor McGonagall."

Up in the stands, Ranma and Shampoo toasted each other with butterbeers as the watched Harry try hard not to spontaneously combust.

"I kind of like the game." Shampoo looked down over the students as they either flooded the field or fled through the exits back to Hogwarts Castle.

"Yeah... it's alright. Harry didn't get to do much and then his catch at the end was worth too much. Maybe if the snitch were always in sight but even harder to catch... yeah, that would be better." Ranma pushed some red hair out of the way and smoothed out her silk top. 'Heh, ki masters don't need no damn warming charms. These kids are wimps. Take away their little sticks and most of them would be absolutely helpless anywhere on Earth.'

Ranma nodded to Shampoo and immersed herself in the Umisenken, a highly effective stealth technique which is arguably more effective than Harry's cloak... until you run out ki or otherwise drop the technique. Shampoo followed Ranma's lead in adopting the Saotome family stealth technique.

Yes! Ranma taught Shampoo a family technique! While positioning herself to help watch over Harry, the purple haired Chinese vixen mentally danced a happy dance for the hundredth time that week. By traditional martial artists standards, that was as close to a marriage proposal as you could get without actually popping the question. Even better really, as you had to be acknowledged as a family member to learn such rare knowledge. Shampoo began to think of good names for strong warrior children.

Eventually the crowds around the pitch thinned out to the point that Harry himself... herself after some muggleborn or other dumped a celebratory cold drink over her head... Harry herself went into the team locker room and cleaned up. She stayed a she for the duration and strapped on all three magical focii in consideration of Astoria's leaked plan for this afternoon. As she wanted Peeves and the snakes to work for their prize this afternoon, Harry put her shrunken Firebolt in a readily accessible pocket. Once again putting on her game face, the blonde haired blue eyed faux princess arranged her hair into her internationally famous bun and braid pattern with a now very familiar pair of enchanted kanzashi. One last look into the mirror (why yes, she did make for a totally super hot girl) Harry stepped out of the locker rooms and into an ambush.

"Gotcha! Looksie here!" Peeves. The spectral shite was as annoying as all get out. More to the point, the poltergeist already slipped by Harry's guard to come away with a very shiny and girlish Scepter of Prissiness. If it weren't for her absolute faith in the Greengrass family, all five of them, then Harry would be cursing up a storm and promising hellfire and damnation unless Peeves returned the precious artifact. Thinking about it that way, maybe she should add a safety measure or two to her normal everyday items of Power.

"Give that back Peeves! It's more than just a shiny stick!"

"OOOoooooOOOOoooo! Little Peevesie is all scared of the big bad Potty! Not!"

As the troublesome specter fled post-haste, Harry pulled out the Firebolt and remounted her noble steed. Once more, Harry Potter flew like the demons of Hell were nipping at her heels while chasing a little shiny thing that really didn't want to get caught.

The chase started outside, but it quickly passed through a side portal into the lower levels of Hogwarts. Harry had to hand it to Peeves. The immortal prankster was remembering to stick to actual openings instead of trying to bring the scepter through walls _and_ he was also bringing Harry into a dank lonely section of the castle that she'd never really been to before. If the snakes were to set up an ambush somewhere along here, well it would be nearly imposs-

Red light filled Harry's vision before she even recognized that the next step in Astoria's Plan of Doom was active. Then all about her was darkness.

Three minutes later, Shampoo dropped the Umisenken and looked around the poorly lit hallway. To her senses, the trail stopped here. The dirt on the floor showed something human sized dropping out of the air and several sets of footprints warmed the stones on one side of the hall, but they entered and left solid stone without actually traveling up or down the hall.

A secret passage. Make that a secret passage behind what seemed to be several tonnes of cut stone. Shampoo didn't know if Ranma was able to breech the wall before she got there, but she was not quite willing to use the Bakusai Tenketsu (breaking point technique) on the walls of a magical castle until she spoke to the Headmaster about possible side effects... or someone's life was in danger. So far, this was all going as Harry had told them it would. Shampoo re-applied the Umisenken and sped off to find someone who would know where the Slytherin Common Room actually was.

"Enervate." And then there was light.

"I don't know which I like better... The Chosen Slag or the Twat-Who-Lived." There was a lot of giggling and snickering going on around Harry.

True to plan, Harry could immediately feel that her original wand and her scepter were missing, but she still had Dumbledore's wand magically adhered to the inside of her pant leg so that one good tug would pull it free. Unless one of the snakes around her was feeling a bit randy, Harry would surely get to it first. She was also free to move about.

"Sit up, Potter. Time to get what you deserve." Daphne punctuated her command with a light stinging hex.

Harry took in her situation. She was sitting on a rather comfy sofa in the middle of the Slytherin Common Room, just as she had been told would happen. Astoria was toying with a holly and phoenix feather cored wand while Daphne was busy casting Lumos against the side of the Scepter of Prissiness to see what light patterns would reflect onto the walls and ceiling. She didn't see Malfoy or any of his hangers on at the moment. Hopefully that wouldn't change as they were the more unpredictable and prat-ish of the lot. Harry really suspected that most of the snakes here would be salvageable if she could just get rid of the top echelon.

She leaned forward so that she could appear non threatening yet still have a hand near her third wand. For a split second, Harry saw Astoria's eyes widen at something behind him, but by then it was already too late.

"Petrificus Totalus." Parkinson! Harry's arms and legs snapped rigidly against her body. Shite. Under a full body bind, her odds for spiritually realigning of Slytherin House just dropped severely.

"However did you make it this far, Greengrass?" Harry could hear the patronizing tone in Draco's voice. If only he could turn around and- "You manage to get Potter in here, but you leave… her… unbound? Did you even check her for that other wand that she carries around?"

Harry finally saw Draco as he walked around the side of the sofa she's stuck on. Pansy's snicker came from behind him. The white-blonde Slytherin ponce stepped up to Astoria and yanked Harry's wand out of her grip. He immediately took the scepter from Daphne as well.

Crap. Things just keep getting better, don't they?

Draco carelessly tossed the Scepter of Prissiness right over Harry's frozen form to Pansy.

"Oooohhhh. Not really my style, but, I'll keep it anyway!" 'Over my dead body, you slag.'

Daphne had enough and overcame her surprise. It was time to rally. "Malfoy, what are you doing here? We had it all under control… Potter wasn't going anywhere! This is my chance to prove myself to the Dark Lord and you are NOT taking it from me!"

Without warning, a sickly orange light jumped out of Draco's wand and caught Daphne in the chest. Her shriek of pain echoed off the Slytherin Common Room walls for a few seconds before she ran out of breath. Astoria was understandably frozen in fear.

"You forget your place, Greengrass. Let me make it clear. Your place is under me." Draco smiled nastily and turned to look at the captive Gryffindor. "And you too, Harriet. Your place will be under me as well… at least until I hand you over to the Dark Lord."

Draco stepped over to Harry and began to run a finger up her inner thigh. Soon enough, he found the lower end of Harry's other wand. Draco's smile grew wider.

"Just as I thought! I'll have to take you to a private dorm and search you for hidden items, Harriet… for an hour or two perhaps. The Dark Lord will have you tonight, but I don't think he'll mind if I've broken your spirit first."

Harry wasn't going to stand for this any longer. She got out of being Mrs. Snape… she got away from that Chinese prince in Jusenkyo Valley… she and Chiba were on the same page when the Inner Senshi implied that they were destined to marry. There was no sodding way that Harry Potter was going to be Draco Malfoy's bitch!

A brilliant golden crescent flared on the captive blonde's forehead. The body-bind dissolved.

Draco snapped his wand up to Harry's face, placing the glowing red tip within an inch of Harry's left eye. Harry almost stopped the call to power… except that a bright flash directly above the couch caused Malfoy to flinch back covering his eyes.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!" As massive amounts magic flooded Harry's current body, massive amounts of ki were being dumped into the visible spectrum thanks to Ranma.

The redheaded aquatransexual had been a bit better at tracking Harry than Shampoo and covertly followed her captors clear into their private domain. Due to the ki flash, none of the present Slytherin students saw more than the barest outline of Harry's twirling magical transformation into Sailor Moon.

Sailor Moon picked up the holly and phoenix feather wand Draco had just dropped and cast a quick stunner in ferret-boy's direction which bounced off a shield he just barely snapped into place with his own wand.

Behind Moon and Draco's personal battle, Ranma was dancing in and out of last year's remaining Inquisitorial Squad members.

This group of thugs re-formed when rumors of an attempt on Potter started circulating through the snakes… an attempt not led by Malfoy. The enraged young Lord Malfoy chose on the spot to defy his new restrictions and rally support for a rapid hostile takeover of the kidnapping plot. Malfoy would sooner answer to the name 'Mudblood' than let little Astoria Greengrass beat him to the prize.

Sneaky they may be… cunning too, but prepared to take on a ki master? No, sir.

The only jets of light Ranma permitted any of his prey to release were the ones redirected into other Slytherins. Pansy's shoulder served as a suitable springboard for Ranma's opening move: a lighting quick bicycle kick. Two stunners passed under Ranma's back as she kicked off from Pansy's unconscious form and channeled ki into both open palms. By the time she landed behind Vincent Crabbe, two low yield ki balls were charged and ready to let loose. Vincent still didn't realize he was facing the wrong way. Ranma ignored him and unleashed glowing blue orbs into a pair of Seventh Years to Crabbe's right and left. Three down and five to go. Correction, three to go. Crabbe was immobile due to fear and confusion while Gregory Goyle was clearly not in the fight. The second boy seemed to lose his resolve as soon as Harry went Senshi and he wasn't even holding his wand out. Ranma desperately wanted to face some real Death Eaters because these kids weren't even going to help her burn off lunch.

Time to show off apparently. Vincent became Ranma's next springboard when she kicked off of his back. As Ranma rocketed to the back wall, Vince found himself getting carpet burn sliding across the floor and under a heavy leather upholstered chair. Vince wasn't unconscious, but decided that he'd rather stay where he was all the same.

As Ranma bounced off of a previous Slytherin Minister for Magic's yelling portrait, three grey to dark curses landed on the wall. Two highly valuable portraits died grizzly deaths when the yellow and orange lights splashed over wood, stone and canvas.

Ranma blurred between the walls before smashing through her three remaining opponents in a headlong rush that knocked their wands out of hand. Less than a second later, pressure point strikes lead all three to join Pansy on the floor napping.

A nervous and frightened ring of students lined the common room walls too afraid to interfere, their self proclaimed leader and his chosen few lieutenants were getting crushed before their very eyes.

On the other side of the common room, the one-on-one match between young dark wizard and young magical (sometimes) girl was turning out to be just as brutal and just and quick as Ranma's five-on-one engagement was.

Draco opened with a second dirty orange curse hoping to at least slow down the scantily clad magical transvestite before him. Then he watched victory slip through his fingers as Moon twisted out of the path of his best sneak attack and leapt bodily at him.

SNAP

Draco dropped his own wand when his right forearm was broken. His bones nearly powdered under Sailor Moon's enhanced strength. The ferret squealed like a stuck pig.

CRACK

Moon slipped behind Draco and drove her fist into his ribs. Let's see how quickly Madam Pomfrey can fix that!

THWACK

Before Malfoy could even think about something other than the pain of multiple broken bones, he lost consciousness due to a Senshi level bitch-slap. No need to kill the little prick even if the desire was there.

Harry looked out through Sailor Moon's eyes. The room was quiet again except for the heavy breathing of panicked bystanders and the ragged pained breathing of Daphne. Better do something about that curse then.

"Looking for this?" Ranma handed Moon the Scepter of Prissiness.

"Right." Moon looked over to the blonde spy silently crying on the floor, a small pool of blood soaking into the carpet from near her hip.

Sailor Moon took the scepter in her hands, held it above Daphne's hip and focused on the feelings she had each time she healed someone before. Dove, the Joketsuzoku warrior at Jusenkyo. Kreacher. The Headmaster in Diagon Alley. Katie Bell. Sailor Moon didn't shout 'get better, damn you' but magic flared in response to her will just the same. Daphne's whimpers of pain turned into mewling sighs of contentment under the pure white flare of Lunar Magic.

Along the walls, more than one student of the house of cunning and ambition found a new path open before them. No longer was the path of darkness and pain the only way to power. No longer was the path of light a sentence of weakness and servitude. Whether the exotic sorceress before them really was Harry Potter all dressed up or the Moon Princess herself, she and her muggle ally had power unlike any of them had ever seen before.

"Is this it, then?" Daphne pulled herself off of the floor and regarded her former prisoner with a look of grim acceptance. She was still trying to make the Greengrass Plan of Doom work. "You'll just flash your white magic and make us all good little boys and girls, hmmmm?"

"I'm afraid we can't allow that to happen." Dumbledore. Several others came in behind the Headmaster including Madam Pomfrey, Professor Slughorn, Shampoo and Usagi.

"Late to the party as usual, Headmaster." Sailor Moon held the bridge of her nose as if willing away a headache. "I suppose you're going to say something about free will and second chances or something?"

"Am I getting predictable in my old age?" Albus smiled and generally took in the mess that the Slytherin Common Room had become. "Kids these days... no appreciation for nice things. Perhaps I can have some house elves come in to tidy up after we deal with the injured."

"And what of Draco? What of those who attacked me? If I did 'flash my white magic' then we wouldn't have to worry about who gets what punishment or who needs which potion to heal their coccyx." Harry always wanted to say that word in front of Hermione or the Headmaster just to try and get a rise out of them. No reaction... damn.

"The reason for keeping Mister Malfoy here in Hogwarts is known to you already and applies equally to the other dark aligned students. You should also be wary of using magic to change the opinions of others... is that not what Mister Malfoy was doing with Assistant Professor Granger in the first place?" Damn! The old man just had to make sense, didn't he?

"Very well, Headmaster. I still want to supervise weekly detentions for the Greengrass sisters. If I can't turn them into peace loving hippie girls with magic then let me turn them into productive members of society with hard work and sweat." Albus seemed to glean Harry-Moon's intent and nodded.

"Perhaps a rigorous mandatory muggle exercise classes sans wands for the rest of them overseen by Mister Saotome and Miss Shampoo?" Harry and Albus both looked to the martial artist.

"The path of a martial artist is fraught with peril... and hurts like you would not believe. I'd be more than happy to give your problem kids a little tough love, Headmaster." Anyone who's ever seen Grand Master Happosai would recognize the look on Ranma's face. It's a look that promises embarrassment and shame and pain for the student, all in vast quantities.

Before Albus could return to his Headmastering, the one present magical girl had a couple more things to say. "Maybe we can let Goyle off the hook. He really didn't do anything more than just stand there. Maybe Crabbe too... I'm not sure about him though. And keep a tighter leash on Malfoy! If I catch him walking free, surrounded by his hangers on and plotting my downfall one more time I will not be so lenient on him."

Albus looked over to Madam Pomfrey as she checked over those who suffered more than minor bumps and bruises in the recent brawl.

"Professor Potter, you brought him to the edge of what can be healed magically. Had your strike to his ribs landed on his spine instead, we would have been forced to send him to Saint Mungo's." Albus tried to guilt Harry into softening his/her stance, not that it helped at all.

"I'll remember that. Next time he acts up Saint Mungo's gets him for sure!" Another flash of light filled the room marking Sailor Moon's de-transformation back to her usual ordinary magic-sex-changing Chosen One Lord Harry Boy-Who-Lived James Potter self.

Was there really a whole month until the next break? Damn, she wanted to play with Cuteness now! Maybe it was time to master the long distance apparition technique.

Chapter End

Reviewers:

**Isis the Sphinx –** It wasn't that important anyway. -shrug- Thanks.

**Sentzetzu – **Like any chemical, cannabis can have all sorts of different effects on different people. You may lose your sex drive to it but the most common effects I've heard about are a) making you really relaxed b) making you really relaxed and horny and c) making you really relaxed and sleepy. Side effects include happiness, great sex, pregnancy, stupidity, criminal behavior and jail. Anal Seepage may be part of that last one. Avoid where prohibited by law.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** That last chapter was a bit forced as compared to the others. Sometimes re-arranging your timetable does not pay off like you thought it would.

**SomeGuyFawkes – **Draco almost had 'Mione. Lucky she didn't give in yet... Did I imply he was successful? I didn't mean to. I find it kind of troubling how lightly the canon story treats love potions. I personally think that Ginny must have used one on Harry and Ron might possibly have used one on 'Mione. I just don't accept the two main canon pairings and I want to cry foul. I am trying, perhaps not always successfully, to show that Harry need not always be the main offense in a fight if someone else can do better. Also, there's my idea that White Lunar Magic is not innately destructive; it purifies, heals and protects.

**uo-chou – **Now the precarious tri-crossed story gets harder to keep running. Characters from all three plot lines will interact a lot more after Yule than I've allowed before.

**WhiteElfElder -** While I am okay with stories that have gender switched characters who change their preferences too, Harry and Ranma are not going to be more than best mates/brothers. Before the Harry/Usagi match was solid, Harry/Ranma was an option that didn't pan out. You could have labeled that idea the MoonPrincess!Harry and EarthPrince!Ranma idea. Potential? Maybe, but not enough.

**nxkris –** We'll see how long it takes to get back to the basillisk. It's a running joke between me and my wife/pre-reader that Harry still hasn't been told the Wizarding World's version of the Moon Queen Fable.

**Fire From Above – **Things are beginning to come full circle. We will see Prince(ss) Herb again at some point too. I am personally irritated that I can't write the Yule break yet. It's the part I want to write but then things have to go in order and stuff. Damn.

**ChronoBlade – **I like seeing wizards take a bullet in the face too. I can't quite decide if pureblood arrogance is do in part to all their cloth being charmed bulletproof or due to the fact that they don't know how dangerous guns are now. That makes a big difference in the story.

**Jimm – **You're welcome.

**deadpoolj –** Thanks. I promise to stick to it until the end.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** I nearly held that last scene the end of this chapter, but it was not really time specific and was already written. I already had Luna pegged as a weed lover though Harry might refuse based on what moralities he managed to get out of primary school. It's hard to tell really. In the end, I wanted Luna to get it on with Harry and the supporting details just fell into place.


	7. I'm Naked

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Seven: I'm **_**Naked**_

Late November, 1996

Augustus Rookwood stood over a prisoner and waved his wand in intricate patterns.

"Your return is well timed, Rookwood. I tire of these brainless fools who surround me. No intelligence... no creative flair." Dark Lord Voldemort stepped up from dark shadows and looked over Rookwood's prize. "This is my new weapon?"

"A weak looking beast to be sure my Lord, but there is hidden potential. I have a submission choker on her at the moment."

Voldemort took another look at his new weapon. He read Rookwood's report days ago, but was still uncomfortably uninformed on this 'Jusenkyo' magic. The beast in question was female and seemed to be an even mix between human and rabbit. She seemed no bigger than a twelve year old witch save for her full curves and long rabbit ears. White and brown fur covered the creature completely, yet the fur was short enough that she had seen fit to clothe herself with simple linens and leather armor.

"I caught up with her and one traveling companion who appeared to be her mate." Voldemort looked up at that, wasn't this being supposed to be a- "The mating was not agreeable to 'Prince' Herb but this cursed form makes her into a weak opponent both magically and physically."

"And what of this mate that she traveled with?"

"Dead, of course, my Lord. He seemed able to detect my approach until I raised a few stealth magics and confunded him. Death followed quickly. She began ranting in the local language, but as he already had her chained to a post, there was little challenge to her capture."

Voldemort briefly considered just handing the creature over to Greyback and his pack. Wolves hunted rabbits, didn't they? "And why is this 'Prince' Herb here today?"

Rookwood heard the anger in those words. You requested the presence of the Dark Lord only if there was much to gain or if you felt like dieing in the slowest, most painful way known to wizardry.

"It is time to revive her and perform the final test, my Lord. The submission choker will retain control over Herb's mind even when the change to male is complete, thus allowing you to see exactly what it is that supposedly makes these ki-masters so dangerous. I have arranged for some mudbloods to be given wands in the next room. They are already Imperiused and potioned into better than normal fighters as a test." Rookwood finished his observations of the bunny-girl and looked to his Lord. "With your permission, I will conduct the test."

Voldemort nodded. With simple and economic precision, Rookwood returned Prince Herb to male form and cast a wandless enervate.

Aside from his now open eyes, Herb of the Musk was still motionless on the table.

"Rise, slave. Rise and defeat the half-dozen opponents you meet in the room behind you." Rookwood gave the command as it was he who placed the choker on Herb.

Herb got up and scanned the door to his rear. "There are nine opponents in the room, Master. Are three to remain alive?"

Rookwood and Voldemort looked at each other. That was unexpected. Unexpected in a good way. Rookwood chose to answer his slave's query. "Kill all nine."

Without any movement of feet or shifts of balance, Herb held one open palm to the door and made as if to push it open from several meters away. Being a ki-master and the son of an enslaved dragon, Herb didn't need to do more.

An eardrum shattering crack stunned both Rookwood and the Dark Lord for a moment before they noticed that the door had been destroyed. More than that, the stone wall between rooms seems to have been cleanly removed and thrown back into the room it once helped define.

"They are dead, _Master._" There was some heat to the word, but Herb was not openly defying Rookwood.

Rookwood shook off his surprise and magically scanned the next room over.

"He's right, my Lord." Rookwood went through a handful of charms to scan the crushed and buried room. "There are no living beings in the room anymore. I would have to call this a successful experiment."

Tom Riddle looked closely at the young man that now stood before them. He privately admitted to himself that even he would have been unable to kill all of them so quickly.

"Well done, Rookwood. Herb will be useful in a project I have planned for our enemies' Yule celebrations."

Prince Herb howled under the crushing weight of the submission choker's magic, yet even the weaker effect on his male form was too much to overcome. All he could do was hurl mental insult after curse after threat against these damn foreigners while his body did as it was told. And how could he even understand these bastards? Curse their magic... one day he'd kill them all.

A stream of cold water caught the Jusenkyo victim from behind causing dense muscle to once again shift into delicate curves and soft fur. As the choker was originally designed for use on females, all internal resistance fell immediately. Even Herb's subconscious desire for freedom and revenge would be buried until hot water found her again.

"Sleep, slave." Herb's enchanted mind filled with darkness and she knew no more.

* * *

December 9th, 1996

"So, are we going?"

Harry looked up from his transfiguration essay to see what Hermione wanted.

"What?" He replied.

"Are we going?" She had that 'you should already know what I'm talking about' look in her eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Slughorn's party." Hermione let a little bit of her frustration show in her voice.

A scheduling issue. Of course. Harry set down his quill. As he leaned back in his chair in their private office next to the lower years' defense classroom, Harry composed his reply. Hermione was still deeply involved in revising her latest potions essay but that wouldn't stop her from following a conversation.

"Of course we're going. Even if he didn't have the best stories of Mum that any professor here is willing to tell over a post dinner drink or two... we owe him for the potion fiasco. That, and he's been really good about keeping Malfoy and his lot in line since the last match."

Professor Slughorn had been furious that students from his house had ambushed Harry after the Gryffindor quidditch victory. Slytherin House's points were cut in half overnight and several more students were 'signed up' for Ranma's pre-breakfast physical torture- er, training. Physical training. Malfoy's wand was never far from Slughorn and the junior dark lord was never given leave to associate with his peers.

"I know we're going, Harry... but are _we_ going?" Before Jusenkyo, Harry still wouldn't have figured out what she was on about, but Harry has now repelled repeated verbal assaults from Minako, Ginny, Hermione, Usagi, Luna and even _-shudder-_ Lavender. With his knowledge of Hermione in particular, Harry determined that this was still a scheduling issue but also had a bit more buried deeper.

"If you would like, then yes. You and I are going to the party together."

Hermione liked being asked as much as the next girl, but Harry knew that his co-assistant professor was deep into her schedules and daily planner now that they were both taking N.E.W.T. classes and teaching lower level classes at the same time. For her, that meant that if Harry didn't offer to be her date by a set time, she had to break social customs and ask first. She could still be as insecure as the next girl too.

"But isn't Usagi going? I thought I saw Slughorn personally deliver her invitation."

Harry smiled. "Being a Crown Princess has it's perks. Usagi's going to be at a cheerleader party that Lavender set up at the same time as Slughorn's soiree. You received an invitation to that one as well if I remember correctly."

Hermione's face flushed. Her work slowed but didn't stop. "Yes, well... maybe I did help come up with the idea, but I'm not on the squad and I'd rather go to Slughorn's party. I seem to remember you getting an invitation to the squad's party too. Wasn't there something about a sleepover?"

"I didn't come up with the idea and I'll be damned if they stuff me into one of those uniforms. They just want to see their lieutenant in the flesh and embarrass the piss out of me at the same time. No. Slughorn is the lesser evil there."

"You sure you wouldn't rather go with Ginny or Luna? I'm sure they-"

"Do you want to go with another bloke? Is that it?"

"What? No!" Hermione dropped her quill and looked him in the eyes.

Harry just smiled again and returned her gaze. "I feel the same way, 'Mione."

Hermione nodded in response. One day she'd have to give him up completely to Usagi. One day, but not yet.

* * *

"_Congratulations, Nabiki. You've been a good girl."_

Said good girl promptly sprayed the far wall of her apartment kitchenette with iced coffee. It was only in the last week that the middle Tendo sister had lost the constant fear of meeting magical girls in random bathrooms. Two weeks had passed since Nabiki's last outing with Cuteness, the pink haired nine year old witch.

"_And may I ask, Sailor Pluto, why you have chosen to meet with me before breakfast? Before getting dressed, even?" _

"_You don't have to defend your Hello Kitty panties to me, Nabiki. Comfort is important in life." _

Nabiki was indeed wearing Hello Kitty panties. As it was still too early enough in the morning for Nabiki to have changed, the young reporter found herself talking to a timeless mahou shoujo in her panties and a tiny cotton top that exposed her slim midriff. At least she wasn't caught nude with a man in her bedroom. That would have been the night before.

"_And having you just show up unannounced in my kitchen first thing in the morning is really comforting, let me tell you." _Nabiki took two quick gulps of the highly caffeinated liquid which substituted for a healthy breakfast today. Only now had her morning dulled brain processed Pluto's opening line. _ "If I've been a good girl, does that mean I win a prize?"_

"_You do."_ Pluto walked around Nabiki and poured herself a drink. _"You've been learning a lot from Cuteness, haven't you?"_

"_She's a sweet girl. She's got more secrets than a political party official, but she's as sweet as can be."_

"_And you've been trying to pry them loose." _ Nabiki froze. _ "Don't worry, Nabiki. You've learned much, but you are smart about what to put on the morning news and what not too. Like I said, you win a prize."_

Pluto pulled a parchment scroll out from… somewhere… and put it on the counter in front of her host.

"_That is going to make you a very happy woman, Nabiki. Now… I'm giving it to you so you can prepare for an interview two weeks from now." _Nabiki stared at the scroll wondering where this was going. _ "Keep this scroll under wraps until the interview. If you can do that, then I will lift all my restrictions on your reporting and you can write any story that you like."_

"_Any story?" _ Nabiki had an idea of who Sailor Moon was. Would Pluto really-

"_Any story." _ Pluto's dark red eyes sparkled in the morning light. _"You won't be able to dig further than you already have, Nabiki. Senshi magic won't allow you to make the connections necessary to uncover every Senshi's identity. Moon's identity has become vulnerable, but it won't matter soon."_

"_It won't?"_

"_You know who Moon was, Nabiki. She can't return to that life quietly."_ Pluto put one delicate finger on the scroll and pushed it closer to Nabiki. _ "Luckily for her, she doesn't need to."_

Nabiki set down her glass of liquid breakfast and picked up the scroll. Slowly, she unrolled the scroll and began to read the sharply cut English script.

"_Betrothal Agreement… Crown Princess Usagi… Ancient and Noble House… oh, wow… Umm, Pluto? Is this thing really-" _Nabiki turned to her uninvited guest, only to see that she was alone in her kitchenette.

Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon. Usagi. Sailor Moon. Tsukino Usagi. Sailor Moon was engaged to be married. Senshi fans everywhere were going to wet themselves when they learned Moon was getting married _and_ no one's ever called her a Crown Princess before. Oh, let's not forget that she probably died at Jusenkyo which means that she'd have to come back from the dead to get married…

Suddenly covering a town council member's morally questionable ties to an underage pop idol singer just didn't seem as exciting as it used to.

* * *

December 15th,1996

POTTER TEACHES ENGLAND TO FIGHT

By Arthur Anderson

I was recently privileged enough, dear readers, to spend time in Hogwarts with the newest members of the teaching staff, Assistant Professors Harry Potter and Hermione Granger. The Wizarding World was shocked two months ago when rumors leaked out of Hogwarts about the Chosen One and his close companion Miss Granger both being given teaching positions upon Professor Snape's disappearance. While Headmaster Dumbledore did not return floo calls requesting an interview, he did issue a statement fully supporting Lord Potter and Miss Granger.

Since those announcements, many prominent citizens have raised their voices either for or against the idea of Potter and Granger teaching defense classes. Only now has the Minister for Magic's office been willing to arrange a meeting between myself and the youngest Hogwarts Professors in recent history.

I meet the pair as their last class of the day ends, a stream of First Year Gryffindors and Slytherins pouring out of the room as I enter. It is at this point that I witness a shocking event. Professor Potter is bestowing praise upon a flustered young Slytherin witch. She had just earned her house twenty points in one class and Potter favorably compared her study habits to his fellow Assistant Professor, Miss Granger. After introductions are made, I get right to the important questions.

_Harry (he still insists on being called by his first name) what makes you the right person to teach England's children Defense?_

"I'm not the only one teaching. Dumbledore still has the O.W.L. year and above students. I teach First to Fourth, but I'm not alone even then. I couldn't teach this class without Hermione by my side."

_The two of you did very well on your defense O.W.L.s, but you are still taking classes yourselves. How do you find the time to learn and teach at the same time?_

"Magic." Miss Granger slaps Lord Potter over the head and he apologizes for his joke before she answers the question in his stead. "Harry learned a special magical technique while visiting Japan over the summer that Headmaster Dumbledore helped us see the value of. Our schedules are tight but manageable."

_And yet you have the experience and knowledge required to teach others? Others who are in some cases only two years younger than yourselves?_

"It's not ideal, I admit that. Professor Snape was brilliant as a defense professor, much as it pains me to say it. What Hermione and I can do is give our best to the class."

_And is there anything you can offer our readers in advice? It's been said that more than a few lives were saved by your words the last time you gave an interview._

"Thank Merlin it helped." Harry and Hermione quickly discussed what he should say before turning back to me. "Well, you should always start with my earlier words on getting free of danger. Assuming you are either trapped in the middle of something or you have good reason to turn and fight then remember this. It's always better to be really good with one or two useful spells than crummy with loads of them. If you spend your free time practicing banishing and summoning, then you can banish knives into their robes or summon walls on top of them. Terrorists seem to like burning down houses and shops, so maybe learn to counter that with water spells... soak the terrorists' robes and then freeze them in place or something. If you practice enough, you should be able to cast silently to catch the dark wizards when they're not expecting it. It helps if you can pick a spell that is quick to cast. The killing curse is seven syllables long. That's pretty long when you're casting back at the baddies. Incendio is only four. Accio is three, so summon your opponent's wand or his shoes out from under him or the table behind him. Expulso is also three syllables and you make things explode with it. And don't forget to keep moving. Shield spells can't block unforgivables so it's better to dodge and fight back that to stand there and hope your shield holds out. I guarantee it won't."

_So you should sneak up on them? Sounds a little Slytherin to me._

"I can be cunning when I want to be and Hermione wants to free an enslaved race. That's real ambition for you. Honestly it might have made more sense if Hermione and I were Slytherins and Draco Malfoy was a Gryffindor. You don't need to be evil to have Slytherin traits."

_So do you think the average witch and wizard has a chance?_

"Everyone has a chance, but you should keep your wits about you. It's a simple list really... One, don't panic. Two, save your family. Three, save yourself. Four, if necessary or if it makes good sense, fight back."

_When does it make good sense to fight back? _

"Well, I've heard that groups of dark wizards have apparated into large gatherings before. If you're in the middle of a crowd of hundreds of wizards and terrorists pop in for a fight, well that's one of those times that drawing your wand and hexing the first terrorist you see might be a good idea. If everyone there who wasn't minding children just drew their wands and hexed the nearest baddie, you might actually win the fight. Hundreds of wands against dozens and all that. Practice your aim though! Mustn't be hexing the wrong people."

_Good advice. Still, not everyone has a prophesy about them._

"Not everyone meets the Dark Lord face to face either. And anything can be a power... even these articles. I could indirectly beat him by proxy or legal action. Prophecies are vague like that."

_Last question. Rumor has it that you intend to attend the Ministry Yule Ball. Can you confirm that?_

"Minister Scrimgeour invited me and I do intend to go."

Harry Potter may have look like a student, but his attitude was professional during my visit with him and his co-Assistant Professor. Miss Granger spent her time grading papers and occasionally helping Lord Potter out of a tight spot with a word or even just a glance. Having seen this unusual display of maturity from Lord Potter not just once, but twice now, I must say to the light wizards and witches of England that this young Lord has what it takes to teach his students and he also has what it takes to win.

For more on D.A.D.A. teachers in the past ten years, see pages 7 and 8.

For Lord Potter's and Miss Granger's O.W.L. results, see page 6.

For a reprint of Lord Potter's first interview, see page 3.

* * *

December 19th,1996

The tip of a holly and phoenix feather wand jerked right once and curtains closed around Harry's bed. A few more swishes and flicks caused a respectable screen of privacy and security charms to settle into place.

Peace.

"You look tired, my Harry." The spirit of Usagi Tsukino may be weightless and insubstantial, but she still draped herself over the young man she would one day marry.

"Yeah? Well I suppose I am tired, Love. Each day I tell myself that this will be the day I finally figure life out… this will be the day everything goes according to plan. Each day my students soak that idea in petrol and burn it to the ground." Harry heard his girlfriend giggle. "What?"

"Every day, my Harry? –snicker- You only teach three day out of seven."

"If only it were that easy." Harry rubbed his temples with callous fingers. "They seek me out after class. I don't remember ever seeing other students track down McGonagall or Flitwick or even Lupin this much."

Usagi broke out in a peal of laughter.

"Harrrrry, Love. Have you figure out why 'your students' need so much extra help?" Usagi floated above her mortal lover and stared down at him face to face. Harry just shook his head. "I help you then… Tell me, my Harry, of students who ask question of Professor Potter, how many are boy and how many girl?"

Harry looked up to Usagi in confusion. He was much too worn down to play a game of twenty questions.

"I dunno, Love. Mostly girls, I think."

Usagi gave Harry a warm smile and replied, "Of all students who ask wise Professor Potter for help, only one in ten is boy!"

As Harry watched, Usagi's attire morphed from normal Japanese school uniform into Hogwarts robes. She then covered her heart with both hands, pouted and fluttered her eyelashes before speaking again.

"Oh wise, powerful and sexy Professor Potter, I am young witch who need strong, firm teaching to become woman. Please be gentle!" Usagi lost her composure among giggles for a moment before continuing on. "Why must sexy Professor Chosen One date with dead girl? He not see me make love-love eyes at him in class so I forget to take notes?"

"No. No no no no no no no no no. They look up to me to teach them defense."

"They do that, yes... then they get butterflies in stomach and dream of wedding bells and kissy-face. 'Mione get boys to crush on her too, but not so many."

Harry covered his head with a pillow.

"Ohhhhhhhh, 'Mione. I'm sorry Love, but that is one girl that I know loves me."

"Yes, I know. And you love her too." Harry went still. "Do not say you are sorry, my Harry. You love 'Mione. I love Rei. You love Luna. I love all other Senshi. Love is good thing, Harry. You love so many people and I do too. Don't ever stop loving 'Mione. I forbid it."

Harry slowly slid his pillow behind his head again and stared up at Usagi sadly.

"She won't say it out loud, but she's really scared that you're going to take me away from her forever. She almost panicked over the idea that I might prefer other company at Slughorn's party tomorrow."

"_If that's the case, Love, then we shall give Hermione an early Christmas present. One that can't be purchased in Shinjuku."_

"_What shall we give her, my Princess?"_

"_Tomorrow night, you are hers. Not mine."_

"_Are you sure?"_

"_Quite sure."_

Two young lovers gazed at each without words as time and space passed them by. After some unspoken signal passed between the two, the feminine floating spirit began to drift downwards, a little smirk forming on her delicate features. Tingling heat began to build in Harry's lips as Usagi dipped in for a kiss. After a soft spectral snogging, Harry and Usagi took advantage of her incorporeal state to become one.

* * *

December 20th,1996

"Harry, m'boy!" Unless Harry missed his guess, Horace Slughorn was actually waiting in ambush near the front door. "Come in, come in, so many people I'd like you to meet!"

And meet people Harry did. Professor Slughorn's Christmas party was loaded with people who were famous for something or other. He recognized several witches, the weird Sisters in particular, but found that most of the people in the room were complete mysteries to him. Thank Merlin Hermione was on his arm tonight! Her keen mind kept conversations going even when he was completely out of his depth. Harry wondered if this is what it felt like to be a trophy wife... husband... whatever. One quick aguamenti would be enough to make him the wife in this relationship.

Hermione, of course, looked radiant in her light blue dress robes. These were not her Fourth Year Yule Ball robes. In fact, the cut was a bit more daring and Harry was seeing more of Hermione right now than he had since… well… that night in Grimmauld Place when they did… stuff.

Let it never be said that Hermione couldn't fill out a robe because... well... if Ginny knew what Harry thought of Hermione in the robes that Ginny herself picked out, then the overly jealous redhead would have never suggested them. Exposed shoulders, a daring neckline that showed an overabundance of skin and cleavage... the skirt's cut did more to enhance what was hidden than what was revealed... in short, Hermione was extremely shagworthy tonight.

Bad Harry Junior! Down! Sit! Don't let 'Mione see you poking out like that! 'Umbridge naked dancing. Dumbledore shagging a troll. Aunt Petunia and Uncle Ver- oh, that's just sick.'

Eldred Worple, his vampire friend Sanguini, even members of the weird Sisters melted to the background as Assistant Professors Potter and Granger were given preference above and beyond any normal star of the 'Slug Club' until Harry finally found his escape.

"Luna? Luna!" Finally! Someone Harry could have a real conversation with! "How are you tonight, Luna?"

"Oh, Harry! So nice to see you here. Have you seen any nargles recently?"

Harry hoped to see the real 'Luna' as she was more dear to him than her 'Looney' defensive screen. Don't get him wrong, privately 'Looney' was more fun then you could possibly imagine... but they were in the middle of a group of strangers here...

"No Nargles, Luna. However did you get here? Did Slughorn see you tracking snorkacks near the lake?" Luna blushed. He could not detect any weed altered Looneyness in her tonight. "Pay close attention to this one, Horace. She's destined for great things."

Luna blushed again when Harry gave her a warm hug, but this could not outdo the smile on Horace Slughorn's face. The Chosen One had singled out a student in his Slug Club for greatness! Game – set – match, Slughorn! At least by Slughorn's way of thinking, this was the case.

"How delightful that you know the daughter of the Quibbler's editor, Harry-"

"Horace, please... this young lady helped me fight off Death Eaters on more than one occasion. And she's more than just an editor's daughter. I'm quite certain that the Grail shaped beacon used in the defense of Anthrax Castle was her creation _and_ it was wielded by her cousins."

Harry saw Horace's face light up at that. Perhaps he had not quite connected the dots. Either way, Luna was overwhelmed by the attention of Horace and his unusual guests this evening. Harry watched as Luna felt the unenviable focus of Slughorn's attention long enough for Harry and Hermione to escape notice.

"Harry, you didn't have to-" Harry pulled his date into a dip. Not that there was any dance music playing, but he always liked keeping Hermione off balance.

"Yes, I did, Mione." Harry pulled his brunette bookworm a little closer, Usagi's words slowly moving from suggestion to directive in his mind. "Tomorrow, I head to the Land of the Rising Sun. I am inviting you and certain others to join us from the twenty-sixth to New Years... but that's entirely up to you."

"I'm invited to Tokyo? Anyone else I know?" In truth, Hermione's parents had been less pleased during each break at the changes their daughter had undergone and only magical law prevented them from pulling her out of Hogwarts entirely for re-enrollment into muggle schools. At least her younger sister fit their ideal of what a daughter should turn out to be. 'Heir and a spare' need not only apply to blue-blood families, after all. "Do you... do you think I could spend my whole break with you? Mum and Da won't likely be in a position to take me for just a few... quite busy these days you know."

Harry's smile was gorgeous. She couldn't quite tell if he preferred keeping her close longer or if he just ignored how lame her excuse sounded. Maybe she was just that lucky.

"I'm sure we can arrange something, 'Mione. I want you to like my friends in Japan and I want them to like you." He gave her arm a reassuring squeeze. "I was going to invite everyone who went to the Department of Mysteries... but... with how Ginny's still giving me the cold shoulder on account of Daphne and all..."

"You might want to give her the offer, Harry. Maybe she'll forgive and forget in exchange for a trip to Japan." Hermione pulled her date into an embrace for a dance that only she could hear. "And if she doesn't, maybe Daphne and Astoria could come instead."

Harry thought about it for a moment. "That actually sounds like a good idea! If Ginny says no, Daphne and Astoria will get an invitation!" Harry dipped down for a kiss and got lips instead of the cheek he was looking for.

Well, if he's going that direction tonight anyway...

"Careful, Potter." Zabini. Of course, they weren't exactly hiding by touching lips in the middle of a crowded party. "You might get a reputation if you're seen just kissing anyone. What would your Princess say to this?"

Hermione was on the verge of panic when she felt Harry smile. Felt being the operative word as he hadn't backed away and his lips still rubbed against her own. He finally did break off the kiss and turn to see a close knit group around Blaise, adults mostly, who were clearly entertained by a little high profile impropriety.

"I expect that Usagi would say something like this..." Harry slipped his wand out and cast a small silent aguamenti at his hand. Instant Usagi. _ "Oh, it's sooooo romantic! They, like, first met each other on a magical train! And then when she was really really sad and crying and all 'I wanna go home' and stuff he saved her life from a troll who was like 'I'm gonna eat you' and Harry was all 'I don't think so' and that was all before Christmas!"_

Harry took a deep breath in. She even stilled her hands which were bouncing about as if to tell the story in sign language.

"_And Hermione set a professor on fire for Harry and Harry-"_

"Stop! Just shut it!"

"Well you did ask what Usagi would say and I have seen the girl just prattle on several times. He's got her mannerisms down pretty good now." Hermione didn't know whether to be impressed or disturbed about Harry's impersonation of his own Intended.

"Zabini, if you ever see Usagi start up a conversation with Lavender or Luna, turn and run. Serious. Bad things will happen to your brain if you don't leave the room."

"Just... forget it Potter. You should have written up a contract with Looney; you and that daft bitch are just made for each other." Blaise turned and stepped into the crowd and in doing so narrowly avoided a very public beat down.

"Harry. Harry! Calm down!" Hermione began to stroke her date's arm. "Calm. Down. Your forehead is glowing."

"They say that men tend to marry women who remind them of their Mums. With any luck he'll follow the pattern."

Harry turned to see the pretty yet eccentric dirty blonde Ravenclaw slide up to him and Hermione.

"Nice one, Luna. Maybe I could see if Pluto's looking for a side project. As I don't know for certain who Mrs. Zabini's first husband was, how do we know that Pluto didn't chuck Blaise into the past in the future under the effects of a love potion or some such thing. Killed before he was born by his own mother who was his wife at the time."

"Harry? Have you been drinking?" Hermione was looking at her queer. Not queer as in gay... well they were a same sex couple out on a date, so that was kind of gay... but not gay as in happy…

"Luna? Do you have your spectrespecs handy? I want to check 'Mione's for wrackspurts."

Hermione was speechless. Had Luna infected Harry somehow?

"Sorry, Harry. I left them back in my trunk. I'd be glad to go retrieve them if you enforce the Potter-Lovegood Agreement though."

"Not tonight, Luna, but if you go back in time to when I was... maybe... seven or eight or so... and promise to help me escape the Dursleys in exchange for my enforcing the contract then you couldn't possibly fail."

"I'll remember that next time I visit with the Fey. Time isn't linear around them, you know."

"You know, I do seem a bit light headed." Hermione just couldn't handle two Lunas. The mind boggled.

Harry turned away from Luna to take Hermione's arm. "I'd better get you some fresh air then. Luna? Be a dear and tell Slughorn that I'm escorting Hermione out, will you?"

"Of course, Harry."

"Oh! Luna, you're going to get a written invitation before I leave tomorrow, but I'll go ahead and say it now anyway. I'd like you invite you to spend some time in Japan with me and the others. Maybe from the day after Boxing Day to New Years Eve. What do you think?"

Luna's smile lit up the whole room. "I'd love to go! I can't wait to see what kind of creatures can be seen on the other side of the world. You are a true friend, Harry."

"And that's why I must bid you adieu. 'Mione needs a nurse right now and I'm on rotation tonight."

Luna pulled her wand out of her cleavage and sent a little hot water Harry's way. "I rather think she needs a knight in shining armor. Once more into the breach, Harry."

With a blown kiss, Luna melted into the crowds and noise of Slughorn's party.

Beautiful. Absolutely stunning. And the stars in the cloudless night sky were quite nice as well.

"Another warming charm please, Harry."

Harry stopped Hermione's shoulder rub and pulled out his first wand to cast the requested charm. True, Hermione could have done it herself, but she was the one being pampered with a cozy stargazing session atop one of the least used and best hidden parapets of Hogwarts' upper towers. Harry actually pulled out his Firebolt to take them across centuries old roofs looking for a bit of defensive stonework that was fully out of the teacher/prefect evening patrol zone.

No one would disturb them there.

As he cast the warming charm, Harry briefly wondered at the trouble his trophy wand was giving him these days. While the wand still worked well, it didn't give him quite the feel of confidence and power that he got from it before. Harry briefly considered that maybe something happened when Astoria hexed him unconscious during that indoor broom ride, but then he'd been stunned or otherwise overcome loads of times with his first wand and that one felt no different today than when he first laid hands on it. But why was he complaining? He still had two wands that worked fairly well for him and then there was the Scepter of Prissiness too.

'Quit thinking about your wands Potter! Get back to rubbing 'Mione's shoulders!' Harry refocused and proceeded to make his closest friend melt like butter.

"Hmmmmnnnnn… That's feels good, Harry. Is it wrong for me to want you all to myself tonight?"

"Not at all, 'Mione. In point of fact, you have me all to yourself tonight."

Hermione didn't physically react, as Harry's magic fingers were making a warm puddle out of her nervous system, but she did sharpen her mental facilities.

"Won't Usagi want to give you a kiss goodnight?"

"Usagi believes that love conquers all, Hermione. Denying our feelings would hurt her as much as it hurts us. We will all live happily ever after. I promise on my magic."

Hermione turned her head to look back at Harry prompting him to move closer. As her eyes caught his, Harry's left hand dropped to Hermione's waist and pulled her in against his chest. His right hand found her cheek and gently guided her to him for a deep kiss.

Hermione could have ruined things for herself by wondering if those few drops of Felix Felicis, her own liquid luck, she swallowed before the party were making Harry do things he wouldn't normally do. Instead, her luck changed yet again for the better when Harry overwhelmed her brain with feelings of love and physical pleasure.

Harry's warming charm was refreshed repeatedly over the next several hours as two young Gryffindors shared a passionate night upon bedding transfigured from new fallen snow.

* * *

December 21st, 1996

"Harry really knows how to clear up a wrackspurt infestation, doesn't he, Hermione?"

Hermione didn't answer with words, but she certainly had _that_ look about her. Her blissful inaction was plenty answer enough for the quirky Ravenclaw. Perhaps Hermione had yet to find her brain after getting it shagged out of her in the most romantic and loving way possible.

"Oi. 'Mione. Y' gonna eat that?" Ron's keen sense of food acquisition alerted him to the fact that her plate was full yet untouched. "'Hermione? You awake yet? Hey Lav, what do you thinks gotten into Hermione?"

Lavender leaned past her boyfriend and took a close look at the normally alert and attentive Assistant Professor. As Lavender was an expert at reading body language, thanks to many long years of face to face rumor spreading, she instantly knew what 'got into' Hermione.

"Oh, Professor!" Lavender sing-songed down the table. "I do hope you remember that student-teacher relations are against the rules."

"………"

"Don't be too hard on her, Lavender. Wrackspurt infestations are not easy to clear up. She had to go straight to the expert, a legend in the field." Luna began to eat Hermione's breakfast, much to Ron's displeasure.

"And who might this expert be Lu-" A new arrival at breakfast interrupted the gossip queen's interrogation.

"'Morning, 'Mione. Sleep well?" Assistant Professor Potter leaned over his close friend and gave her a quick kiss on the forehead.

Lavender's brain almost exploded. As happy and content as Hermione looked a moment ago, somehow she had just doubled up on her feelings. Meet mister wrackspurt expert, Lord Harry James 'shag 'em rotten' Potter.

"Good morning 'Mione!" Usagi floated over Hermione's other shoulder and gave her a big smile. "I hope you like my early Christmas present to you. Being dead make going shopping very hard."

"Oh… Oh my, yes! Thank you ever so much for your most generous present, Usagi."

Hermione finally snapped into action by squeezing Harry's hand and brushing her shoulder through Usagi's side. Think of it as a ghost hug. Hermione then snatched her fork out of Luna's hand and began to attack the scrambled eggs.

Lavender's brain exploded. She made her excuses to a confused Ron and almost ran to Parvati who was sitting by her sister at Ravenclaw Table in preparation for the trip home for the holidays.

If only someone else hadn't been as attentive.

Ginny wanted to scream. She wanted to get up from her seat three down on the opposite side of the table and cast the Reductor curse right into that smug whore's tits. She wanted to rip Harry's wandering cock off with her bare hands.

She didn't. Oh, how she wanted to, but she didn't. Weasley's don't do dark. They don't cast unforgivables, they don't get sent to Azkaban and they certainly don't castrate Chosen Ones. Sure, they use potions and charms and a bit of social trickery to land the coy and the hard to get but so does any other light sided family that's still pureblooded after all these years. But bloody hell if it wasn't working at all this time.

Ginny's actually quite grateful that Draco got caught dosing Hermione before Ginny could actually try dosing her own target. Now anyone can see that Harry's so well guarded even Luna would be safe... she's actually one of his lines of defense! No. Ginny's custom Weasley family recipe, the one Mum called 'Happily Ever After in a Bottle' is useless to her now.

Or is it? Maybe... maybe she's been looking at it all the wrong way. Somethings got to change.

Ginny looked around. Good, no one seemed to be watching her. A slight wrist dropped into the bookbag at her feet and lifted out an opaque red potion bottle. Next she dipped her hand a little deeper to get at a small cloth sack which held a few of her favorite elixirs and lotions for when she went to powder her nose. Within the sack was a selection of hairs of various colors. It never hurt to have options, did it?

There. That one. Just the thing for a light witch like her to get her knight in shining armor, and this course of action would be far, far easier that making Harry Potter love her or making Hermione Granger love someone else apart from Harry Potter.

Ginny dropped the hair into her potion, gave the bottle a good shake and promptly drank every last drop herself.

For the first time in days... weeks even... Ginny smiled. Oh, yes. It was working already.

The first Weasley witch in generations left her seat and walked around to the other side of Gryffindor Table.

"Harry."

Conversations stopped. Everyone tensed up as the Demoness of Gryffindor Tower addressed her arch-rival.

"Ginny. What can I do for you?" Harry was at least being pleasant. Thank Merlin she hadn't well and truly cocked up their relationship yet.

"Well... I'd like to thank you for that invitation. It really means a lot to me that you still want me around after all the grief I've given you recently." Ginny could see a spark of hope in Harry's eyes. "I was being a right bitch and I'm really sorry about that. If you really mean it, then I'd love to spend time in Japan with you and Usagi. Is the offer still open?"

The Potter smirk. If it wasn't for the potion assaulting her heart and re-writing her dreams, then she would have fallen for those damn green eyes all over again.

"Of course it is, Gin! We'd love to have you. And if you think clothes shopping in Diagon Alley is fun, then Shinjuku is going to blow your mind."

"Thanks, Harry." Her smile was a bit more genuine than it was a minute ago. "Were you going to invite Daphne and Astoria too?"

"I was thinking of it. Do you have a problem with that? Them being Slytherins and all?" Harry was really asking if she still had a problem with him having shagged the elder Greengrass and they both knew it.

"Go right ahead. Between you and me, the Sorting Hat brought up Slytherin as an option... I probably would have been friends with those two had things gone differently."

Ginny could see the utter shock fall over her brother's face among the crowd listening. Hermione seemed to have that 'I knew it!' look about her. Harry... oh Merlin...

"I know just what you mean Gin. Bloody hat said I'd do very well in that house... I actually begged for anywhere but Slytherin before it made a Gryffindor. Looks like I won out in the end, eh?"

Ron, Hermione and quite a few others were all wearing looks of utter shock at that. The Golden Boy of Gryffindor had almost been the Silver Prince of Slytherin. By Merlin, what a nightmare that would have been.

"You sure did. You're going to kick old Tommy's arse, Harry, and if I'm lucky, I'll be right there with you. Someone has to keep Tommy's Death Munchers off your back."

"I'd rather you be somewhere safe, but then lionesses like Hermione and yourself don't just sit back and wait patiently for your wizards to do all the dangerous work, now do you?"

"No, we don't, Harry. Well, I've got some more packing to do before the train, so ta-ta for now." Ginny moved in for a quick if innocent kiss to Harry's cheek.

Well that's life for you. All she had to do was give up on his heart forever and the very next minute she's kissing him.

As Ginny called out a few more fair thee wells, she paused. Ginny wavered behind one boy who she hadn't spoken to in far too long. Even if she weren't a Gryffindor, the potion she had taken not five minutes ago was already urging her to put a little effort in. Yes, it was time for this bachelorette to try her hand with bachelor number two.

"Neville?"

"Er, yeah, Ginny?" The nervous, but not so nervous as he used to be, boy turned in his seat to address her.

"Will you be going to Japan too?" This wasn't Harry. All of Ginny's nervous tension had fled and her hopeful smile was warm and honest now.

"I'd... I'd really like to. Probably have to get Gran to okay the idea... but I'm planning on going. And you?"

"Absolutely. If Mum tells me no, then I'll just sneak over to your place and we can run off together, yeah?" She could have said Luna's was an option, but this was a fishing expedition.

"Oh!... Er... Of course, you can. Sneak off, I mean... you know, if you need to. That's... that's perfectly fine by me." Good old Neville. His blush was bright enough to light up the Great Hall all on it's own.

"Excellent! It's a date, then."

Without giving him a chance to dodge back, Ginny darted in for her second kiss of the day. As Nev was already blushing like a Weasley, Ginny figured his cheek must be boiling where that little peck landed just now. Funny. The little nudges in her head to wink or giggle or run off to write him a letter got a lot bigger with that one kiss.

A few chairs down, Harry, Hermione, Luna, Ron and Usagi all watched the little drama unfold with rapt attention.

"Did... did my sister just hit on Nev?"

"I think she did, mate. That's a good thing in my book. He'll be good to her, you can be sure of that." Inside, harry was jumping for joy. Things just got soooooo much easier. "Dobby."

pop

"Dobby is here! What can Dobby be doing for the Great Lord Harry Potter Sir?"

"Green light, Dobby."

"Yes Sir, Professor Lord Harry Potter Sir!"

pop

"And what was that about?" Hermione was equal parts upset over Harry's more forceful command of the elf and intrigued that a plot was developing.

"Oh... nothing much. Just two Slytherin students are about to learn that my detentions don't get canceled out due to silly little things like holiday breaks."

"You did say that Daphne and Astoria would be invited." Ron seemed to be in deep thought for a moment. Don't laugh. It happens sometimes. "Thanks for letting Ginny decide, mate. That was good of you."

"Congratulations Ron." As Hermione turned to address Ron, Luna stole another quick bite off of her unguarded plate. "I think you now have the emotional depth of a bucket. Keep this up and we'll be able to size you for a barrel before July Second."

Proving his new found depth, the youngest Weasley wizard did not immediately attack Hermione, nor did he blush from anger nor embarrassment.

"You can blame Lavender for that. She actually insists on talking about stuff after we... er... what I mean is that she really wants to know the real me and how I can rule the chess board one minute and then absolutely pillage a kitchen table right afterwords."

Harry smiled and thought of Usagi. He may have bedded several girls in the past six months or so... Hermione twice now... but he's only done 'pillow talk' with Usagi. God, but he loved her... and as an added bonus, his Japanese was almost to the point where he wouldn't need the translation ring anymore. In fact, as a Christmas present, Harry was planning on having a full conversation with Usagi in Japanese without the ring.

At the complete opposite end of the Great Hall, a witch dared enter the teacher enforced solitary confinement bubble that surrounded Draco Malfoy and his lonely corner of Slytherin House's table for a good three or four meters in any direction.

"Draco."

She leaned over him in a way as to let both of their faces be seen by the professors but not show them what she was holding onto. As much as she would like to linger, that damned muggle freak redhead had just stopped talking to Headmaster Dumbledore and was watching her suspiciously.

"Pansy. Have you got something for me?" She nodded.

As the two shared a sedate yet still rule breaking kiss, Pansy dropped a parchment and a small box onto the bench next to her fellow Slytherin's thigh.

"I've got to go. It'd be best if I got detention and points off several paces away from that."

"Then go. You will be rewarded. You have my word."

Pansy dipped in for another kiss, faster but deeper at the same time, before boldly walking over to the Head Table to see what punishment will await her... if this doesn't get worse before it gets better.

Draco slipped the box and parchment into his lap and began to read as he ate.

Young Malfoy,

Your failures have cost me much and I am not a patient man. You are lucky that a suitable replacement could be found for your first mission else we would be face to face and you would be begging for the end.

However, there is one way available for your to regain lost ground. The box. The item inside is not inherently dark and so it will pass successfully through castle wards. It is powerful and it is dangerous. To ensure success, do not open the box until you are within two paces of your target. Do not target Potter. Target the ghost. You need only open the box and the rest will take care of itself.

Do not hesitate. Get up, get moving and destroy my enemies.

Your Master

As soon as Draco finished reading the parchment, it turned black and fell to ash in his lap. All that was left was a small rough iron box. Slowly, he slipped the oddly heavy box into a fold in his robes.

_Do not hesitate._

Draco wiped at his chin with a napkin before standing and leaving the Great Hall via the closest side doors. With any luck, they wouldn't see him going around the long way.

* * *

Thousands of kilometers away from Hogwarts Castle, in a private residence in Tokyo, two young girls were going over dinner plans for the evening.

"_But I don't know what Daddy likes to eat, really. I mean… I know he liked most everything he tried during his summer visit, but I've got no idea what his favorite dinner is. Oh, I give up… let's suggest a good home cooked meal and see what Makoto is willing to bring over." _

A pink haired girl with red eyes quit biting on the end of her pen and began adding to her blank grocery list. At the very least she was going to need more seaweed for fresh sushi rolls and more miso soup. What else… It was getting hard to concentrate, what with Daddy coming back and this headache that started… what… five minutes ago?

"_Don't worry Usa-chan. I bet Setsuna-mamma will offer to take us all out to celebrate and- hey, what's wrong?" _Hotaru started when she saw her best friends complexion suddenly change. Was Usa-chan beginning to sweat?

"_It's just a he- oohhhhhhh. I really don't feel good."_ Cuteness tried to look at her friend, but there were two Hotarus in the room and both were getting blurry.

"_Usa-chan? Usagi?!" _

Hotaru was about to put her hand on Cuteness's shoulder when the smaller girl suddenly listed to port and collapsed onto the kitchen floor. Hotaru went white in fear.

Was it a trick of the light, or was her dearest friend going see-through?

"_SETSUUUUUUUNAAAA!"_ The twelve year old girl pulled out a Senshi communicator and mashed her hand down on the panic button before hitting Pluto's button. _"PLUTO! Come home NOW!"_

"_What happened?" _There was movement behind Hotaru as Pluto appeared in the room and stood over the two girls.

Before Hotaru could answer, Pluto pulled out her own communicator and hit the all call button_. "Girls! Get over here now. Drop whatever it is you are doing and get over here!"_

All across Tokyo, girls stopped watching movies or doing their after-school clubs or stalking boys and sprinted of to find a quiet room to transform in. Thank the Gods that cell phones were getting more popular or the normal people that heard Pluto yell from purses and pockets would have been more surprised than they already were.

"_What's happening, Pluto?" _

Hotaru was beginning to tear up. She almost never heard Pluto yell and she's never ever seen Usa-chan look like this before.

"_Transform, Hortaru dear."_ Pluto never moved her eyes off of her beloved Small Lady. Cuteness was completely limp on the floor… not bleeding, but she was a bit transparent.

If they couldn't stop whatever it was that was happening, a paradox would remove Sailor Moon's daughter from the face of history. That would be bad. Very, very bad. Whole years would be undone.

"_W-what's h-happen-ning?!"_ Hotaru hadn't transformed yet. She was too scared. She needed an answer.

"_Something's about to happen to one or both of her parents, Hotaru. I need you to transform. When all the girls are here… we teleport right to Hogwarts Castle."_

What little blood remained in Hotaru's face drained out. Later, she wouldn't even remember transforming into Sailor Saturn even if though it must have happened.

Why didn't she know this would happen? Pluto mentally railed against Jusenkyo and the presence of three cursed individuals so close to her future Queen. How could she protect the future if the Gate couldn't properly analyze the actions and inactions of Jusenkyo victims? If there were any silver lining to this storm cloud then perhaps it was the relatively slow affects on her Small Lady. The chaotic nature of Jusenkyo was giving Pluto a window of opportunity to fix things; that's something that no one's ever gotten before that she could recall. If a paradox were something that you could see coming, then Atlantis would still be the primary seat of human power and culture even today and not the stuff of legend that current history texts are left with.

Pluto couldn't leave the Small Lady alone for this raid and she's much to bad off to take with them. She couldn't spare Saturn as they might need a Silence Wall. Might need Mercury's computer too… Jupiter? Makoto is great at hand to hand, but then Ranma's already at the castle if they needed that. It's settled then. Pluto will have Jupiter stay behind to monitor Chibi-usa while everyone else runs off to storm a castle.

* * *

It didn't take long. Draco knew Hogwarts as well as anyone… he knew it plenty well enough to cut down a floor, over two hallways, up two floors, down another hallway and down one last stairwell.

There it was… the Great Hall entry immediately behind Gryffindor House's table. All he had to do was walk another twenty steps and, assuming the damn ghost was still in the Great Hall, his task for Lord Voldemort would be complete. Honestly, he didn't know what his task was supposed to accomplish, but there must be something of great power in this box for it to affect the dead.

"Hey! Hey you!"

Merlin's salty sack! Not now! Why couldn't that sex-changing muggle leave well enough alone. Draco saw the redheaded whore step out of the very doorway he was looking to enter. Without his wand, Draco knew that the filthy peasant could break him into pieces. Draco had little choice now. There was another door into the Great Hall closer to him, but he would be at the other end of Gryffindor Table. Well if this artifact was powerful enough for the Dark Lord to smuggle it into Hogwarts, then surely being in the same room with Potter's ghost bitch would be good enough. He stepped into the Great Hall.

Sure enough, the redhead stepped back through her doors and began to make her way to him.

To hell with them all! Draco reached into his robes and pulled out the iron box.

"HIME-SAN!" "USAGI-CHAN!" What?

When you yell 'Princess' at the top of your lungs into a hall known for having good acoustics, everyone is going to hear.

Every person in the hall turned as one to see a combat group of young, beautiful and deadly mahou shoujo storm through the main entry to the Great Hall.

"_Hey, guys! What are you doing here?!" _ Usagi hadn't quite noticed the urgent look that was worn by each of her dearest friends.

"_Girls! That one standing up is acting funny!" _ Ranma pointed straight at Draco.

Ranma knew the young Lord was up to something and she also knew that Senshi don't just drop in un-announced for social calls. Add to that the sheer number of Alien-Warrior-Princess-Super-Veela present and you have BAD THINGS happening.

Anyone who did not understand Japanese also did not know or care why all of the gorgeous foreign cheerleaders looked over to stage right, but Draco cursed his luck when one enemy singled him out to what were clearly more new enemies. Draco ignored the fact that holiday departures had lured several ghosts other than his target into the Great Hall; Hell, they were already dead anyway. Right?

He did the only thing he could do. He opened the box.

As Draco peered into the box and wondered at the powers of such a dull and lifeless shard of stone, the artifact's power escaped it's cold iron prison claiming it's first victim in the process.

As one, every ghost in the hall felt a pull, cold and unrelenting, on their very existence. Nearly Headless Nick felt it the strongest as he was already within spitting distance of Draco when he opened the box.

"What are y-" Was all Nick managed to get out as he was sucked into the stone, lost to this world forever.

Draco lost his grip on the iron box as well as his consciousness when a Senshi with blonde hair and bluegreen eyes pinned him to the back wall with her fist one quarter second before Ranma and Shampoo could act on the same impulse. The stone tumbled out of it's repository and stopped a small distance away.

"Usagi?"

"Harry?"

Usagi was pulling away. She was being pulled away as surely as every ghost in sight was. The stone... that whatever it was... was slowly pulling every spirit into it's depths.

"Hey! What's goi-" Was all that Peeves got out before he too fell into the stone.

The delinquent poltergeist had just passed through the front wall into the Great Hall and thus never saw his doom before it was already upon him.

"Harry!" The pull was getting stronger. Harry jumped out of his seat to stay close to Usagi's side.

"Bloody Hell! Help me!" Myrtle! She started a few seats down by the Creevey brothers but was being pulled into the stone as surely as any other ghost in the castle.

The student population of Hogwarts finally broke through their collective shock and began to explode in fear, shock and confusion. The professors behind their great table began to shout instructions down to the students, but those commands were neither heard not heeded.

"_Uranus! Put the stone back in the box and close it! Saturn! Drop a Silence Wall in front of the stone!" _ Pluto was barking out orders. The other Senshi followed her lead as Venus was out of her depth and Moon was distinctly unavailable.

Uranus went down on bent knee to grab the stone as Saturn moved in front of her and began to cast Silence Wall.

A shriek fit to raise the dead stopped Saturn mid incantation. Uranus fell boneless behind her.

"_It's some kind of death based power!" _ Mercury was scanning the stone actively now. _ "Anything Saturn can cast would only make it stronger. Get away from it Saturn!"_

As the Senshi of Silence put as much distance between herself and the stone as she could, Pluto turned to Mercury.

"_Weaknesses?"_

"_Unsure! The opposite of death would be life, but I can't prove any one of our powers will counter it! Maybe Moon, but..." _ Mercury could tell you all about the stone's chemical composition, even how it was snagging spirits... but that did not give her an answer. Not an answer that she wanted to hear anyway.

Harry looked into the panicked eyes of the girl he is supposed to marry, the mother of his child, the reason he lives and breathes... and chose to act. 'Maybe Moon' She said. He had to tap the biggest power available to him. He needed cold water. Harry suddenly stopped following Usagi and dipped his fingers into the nearest cold drink.

Now wearing the correct, if improper, gender she drew the Scepter of Prissiness and called to Power. A now well known golden crescent moon sigil flared on her forehead.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!"

An new wave of power washed over the Great Hall. Most of Gryffindor, Ravenclaw and a handful of students in the other two houses witnessed a very public Senshi transformation. The students and teaching staff of Hogwarts Castle seemed to realize all at once that they were only spectators in this magical display of love, devotion and raw power.

"USAGI!"

Sailor Moon called upon her love for Usagi Tsukino, the spirit of the girl who received this power honestly. Usagi fought through the mindless panic to release all of her love for Harry just as she had in Diagon Alley last summer. Innate magic, love and intent mixed and multiplied.

Pure white Lunar Magic flared in the shaft of the Scepter of Prissiness, and with it, Usagi stopped floating back. Myrtle too. The Bloody Barron, the last ghost present in the room aside from the two girls, found his course drawn to the right and between the White Magic of Sailor Moon and the cold pull of the stone.

Ranma had also had enough of sitting on the sidelines waiting for commands to be given. The stone favored death huh? Might be weak against life? Well, what was ki if it wasn't life?

"_Harry! Pull harder! I'm gonna take the rock outside and blow the shit out of it!"_

With those words, Ranma released a massive field of ki into the air around her and picked up the stone. It burned. It burned like the fires of Hell, but she didn't let go and she didn't waver. Ranma bounded from wall to column to wall again until finally she found a clerestory window and barreled through the ancient stained glass panels. Venus and Mars followed her outside just in case they had to try something else.

Inside the form of Sailor Moon, Harry Potter desperately ransacked her memory for something... anything that could help her pull harder. Something powerful. Something like the scepter. Someth- the pendant! With a light application of will, Sailor Moon called Queen Tranquility's crescent moon crystal pendant into service and it materialized above her breast.

As soon as the Lunar artifact made contact with Sailor Moon's body, it flared as brightly as the scepter in her hands and her control over Lunar Magic instantly doubled, quickly cresting over a previously unknown threshold. Harry Potter didn't just want Usagi to be saved... she wanted her _back._

For the first time, Harry had the power and control required to get exactly that.

As the white out of Sailor Moon's magical release finally dimmed, Harry Potter lost her hold on the Senshi transformation and fell to her knees weak and dazed.

"Harry?"

"...ye-yeah?..."

"Harry!"

"...huh?..."

"_Harry! Look at me!"_

She opened her eyes. At first, her lack of energy prevented her from seeing what Usagi wanted. Sure, she was naked, but Harry's seen that before... her smile was much brighter than usual... and why was she naked in the Great Hall of all places?

Harry, and the rest of the staff, students and Senshi in the hall were temporarily distracted when a second sun appeared to shine through the Great Hall's windows. Two seconds later, all of the glass windows rattled and the castle shook lightly as a deep boom could be heard to echo around the grounds and nearby landscape.

Shampoo called out, "I think Ranma broke the rock!"

Back to more pressing matters, why couldn't Harry see through Usagi?

"_Harry! I'm alive!"_

Wait a tic.

Harry stood on unsteady legs and staggered over to Usagi, finger out ready for a poking.

Poke. Poke. Why yes. Her face is real.

Usagi giggled. Harry finally noticed that the rest of the hall was whispering furiously. To Harry's left, a second girl said the phrase 'I'm alive'. Why would anyone say that? Her voice did seem kinda familiar...

Harry's brain finally seemed to get back into gear.

"Usagi! You're naked!"

Usagi's smile dropped of of her face under a tidal wave of social embarrassment. She looked down at herself and realized that she was indeed naked.

"Shimatta! I'm _naked!_ Next time you bring me back from dead, I not want to be naked in room full of school children! You hear me?!"

With a startled shriek, she snapped a hand out and took Harry's school cloak off his shoulders. As soon as she had Harry's cloak wrapped around her shoulders, Harry made the last connection that Usagi was in fact alive and breathing and right there and Harry just had to touch her and hold her and start crying on the nape of Usagi's wonderful, perfect neck.

Acting on pure instinct, Usagi grasped the Scep- no... the Kaleidomoon Scope from Harry's trembling fingers and used her Senshi powers for the first time in over a year.

She summoned her royal white dress and accessories. No girl likes being naked under a cloak in the middle of a crowded school hall. Also for the first time in over a year, Usagi's trademark ultra-long twin bun-and-streamer hair fell softly over bare shoulders and down her back like two silver rivers.

"I lo-ove yo-ou, Usa-agi!" Harry looked her Love in the eyes. "Love you s-so much!"

"_And I love you, beloved. More than anything else in this world, I love you."_

"_W-well, I suppose I c-can let you l-love Cuteness more...."_

Usagi giggled again. She was sure she'd be sobbing right along with her gender switched husband-to-be if it weren't for the fact that she had lungs that worked and a heart that was beating again and she had a pulse and her skin itched and everything... and holy shit, she was hungry!

Ever so slowly, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon began to coax her recovering Love over to the group of nervous and overjoyed Senshi who all seem to be really red faced and teary eyed right now.

"_And what happened to Uranus? Hmmm?" _ Harry was still out of it, but Usagi was in control enough to see to her Senshi.

Hotaru stopped her efforts to heal the Outer Senshi and looked up.

"_She will recover, my Princess, but she still needs either time or a bit of a boost to wake up."_

"_I have energy to spare though time may be short." _

Usagi held the Kaliedomoon Scope over Uranus and released a pulse of love into the blonde's chest.

Seconds later, Uranus opened her eyes.

"_What the Hell happened? I feel like a tried to fist-fuck a chipper-shredder." _She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and caught sight of Usagi. _"Princess? Is that you?"_

Shampoo stepped up behind the Royal Couple and softly suggested, "The Great Hall is too full for a proper reunion. Shall we move to the other side of these doors?"

Shampoo motioned game show hostess style towards the very doors Draco had entered through only a few minutes ago. Usagi nodded and pulled an unresisting Harry through with her. One by one the Senshi followed their Princess through the doors until Shampoo was alone, relatively speaking, with Draco's motionless form.

She wanted to kill him outright, but she couldn't. Judgment should be reserved for Harry and his bride. Hurt him? Oh, yes. She could hurt him real bad real easy.

Before anyone else could move forward or stop her in any way, Shampoo jabbed at Draco's form with her fingers. In the space of two seconds, she must have hit fifteen to twenty separate pressure point strikes. Albus Dumbledore was right; there are many fates worse than death and Shampoo was just making sure that Draco Malfoy was introduced to five or ten of them. She also re-cracked his skull just to make sure he'd be out of it for many long hours.

With a final smile and wink into the general Hogwarts population, the fierce amazon slipped quietly through the doors into the next hallway and found herself in a crowd full of crying magical girls.

"_... how goes things?... She's up and around?... good, good... no, we won't take to much longer, but you can change back now if you want..."_

Some of the Senshi were crowded around a communications device... some video phone or something... and seemed to be telling Harry and Usagi about this 'Cuteness' girl and her flu or something.

Seconds after Shampoo's exit, Harry's closest friends from Hogwarts slipped through the other door into the same hallway and joined Assistant Professor Potter in welcoming Usagi back to the Land of the Living.

* * *

Outside of Hogwarts Castle, about two kilometers north of school grounds, three figures stood at the edge of a sixty meter wide crater full of smoking rocks and burning scrapwood. Further out, grassland was scorched and burning for hundreds of meters in every direction.

"_Mission accomplished ladies. I broke the rock."_

The initial detonation tossed Ranma into a flash-heated pool of rain water and reversed his Jusenkyo curse. Ranma was scorched, singed and torn, not unlike the landscape around him. An image of the stone was burned into his left palm where he had been holding onto the stone for the whole outbound journey to find a safe area to go full apeshit on the damn rock

He didn't hold back at all. There was nothing but grass and insects for at least a thousand meters in every direction. If the Senshi that followed him out couldn't take a little mass devastation and remain standing, then why have serious magical powers and flimsy stupid costumes, right?

Ranma had chucked the rock into the air before launching twin lances of super heated and super cooled ki into the center of the it as his target sailed out past the two hundred meter mark.

How was he supposed to know that the tiny little thing would release about the same amount of power he and Prince Herb let off that one time they mixed it up on the slopes of Mount Horai... right before they blew the whole fucking top off of the damn mountain and caused a rock-slide of epic proportions.

Looking back fondly at his past exploits, Ranma glanced over to the two Senshi to see how they weathered the detonation. Both Venus and Mars were singed, frayed and frowning. Humph. They got no sense of style.

"_Broke the rock? Broke the rock? You insensitive prick! You broke Scotland! And I broke a nail. When we get back home, it's time for a manicure... and you're paying." _

That was Venus. He should'a known better than to let the girly-est magical girly-girl tag along. Some days it just doesn't pay to save the world.

**Chapter End**

Chapter Notes:

There is an indirect reference to _Luna's Hubby_ by Meteoricshipyards; a good story to read if you're into Harry/Luna.

Reviewers:

**deltawaves –** I'm not currently on anything. Pity.

**WhiteElfElder – **Dumbles is odd that way. The problem is, if you make him a better person, then you have to re-work the story from the very beginning unless you let him be a ass for a little while and then repent his ways... or take the 'senile old fool' path. Malfoy is used incorrectly by Rowling in my opinion; he's getting even more of his ass kicked next chapter than in this one. Can you say 'direct attack on a royal sovereign?'

**nxkris –** Wish granted.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** Thanks for reading.

**deitarion/SSokolow – **It is a little Ranma soft... but then Usagi and Ranma have both been waxing and waning behind Harry. I plan to have more of the original aquatransexual soon.

**Fire From Above – **Draco's troubles have only just begun, Shampoo fucked him up good and Harry hasn't even had time to get angry yet.

**ariel stormcloud – **Thanks.

**Wonderbee31 –** Wish granted. See my responses to WhiteElfElder and Fire From Above.

**Jimm –** Thanks for reviewing.

**son of a peach –** I sincerely hope this story helps get you laid.

**ChronoBlade – **An intriguing query. Hypothetically speaking, if I use my own background explanation for Jusenkyo, then the whole cursed pool area is Queen Tranquility's big accident. If Tranquility was the weaker Lunar Royal, then the Serenity line would be stronger... Sailor Moon might actually be able to shrug off the change while transformed... it just might work.


	8. Still Naked

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Eight: Still Naked**

December 21st, 1996

Hogwarts Castle was quiet. Well, not the whole castle, but certainly the fourth floor corridor Ginny Weasley was currently walking lazily along on her way back to Gryffindor Tower.

Her life was going to change for the better. She knew it. Why? Because every second of every day of the rest of her life would focus on something other than Harry Potter.

If Neville Longbottom weren't so terribly distracted by current events in the Great Hall, he would have noticed a shiver run up his spine causing the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up. Poor boy thought it was part of the afterlife and death struggle he was personally witnessing.

As her mind was lighter and more open than it had been in years, the Fifth Year Gryffindor witch easily heard a new noise working its way through the corridors. Hmm. Sounded like someone just won a quidditch game but no one's playing and all of the students are in the Great Hall, right?

Ginny stepped over to a window in the corridor overlooking the Great Hall's roof. She pushed open the old window pane and braced herself against the cold. Noise assaulted her along with the winter wind.

By Circe, she can't leave Harry alone for five minutes, can she? What has the prat done now?

As Ginny watched, a bright white light filled every window in the Great Hall. Only seconds after the light began, a glowing figure smashed out of one of the upper windows and leapt from rooftop to rooftop out of Ginny's sight. Two more colorful but not-glowing figures followed the first one out.

If Ginny had to guess, those were Senshi like Usagi. Looks like packing her trunk could wait a little longer.

Before she could turn from the window and head back down to the Great Hall, a huge flash of light appeared in the sky.

_**BOOOOOOOOM**_

The fifteen year old Gryffindor witch had to stop for a moment to rub her eyes and desperately hope that her blindness wasn't permanent. To her great relief, things did to come back into focus. As if she hadn't just experienced the oddest chain of events in her entire life, an otter shaped patronus flew down the corridor and stopped right in front of her face.

"Come quick, Gin! Harry just brought Usagi back to life and Malfoy's in some seriously deep trouble!" Hermione's voice bounced around the hall for a moment before the patronus went silent and disappeared.

"Fuck, I leave the room and the bloody world crumbles behind me!"

Rather than run back to the Great Hall, Ginny pulled out her miniaturized Nimbus, returned it to it's original size and hopped on in record time. Hallways and staircases became a blur as Ginny heeded Hermione's call at best possible speed.

If Malfoy was about to get his comeuppance, she wanted to be there to watch!

As Ginny swung wide into the last side hallway before the Great Hall, she got the shock of her life when her broom was snatched out from under her by a girl with bluegreen hair.

"_It's alright, Neptune! She's friendly." _

Pluto called out to the Senshi who was moments away from taking care of Ginny permanently. To be fair, a real attacker would have come upon the chaotic crowd just as quickly. Ginny picked herself up off of the stone floor and took her broom back from an apologetic Senshi.

"Ginny!" Hermione yelled at the recovering girl from the other side of the crowd.

All of Harry's closest non-Slytherin friends were trying unsuccessfully to get to Harry's side: the tight ring of Japanese magical girls was seemingly wizardproof at the moment. Ginny began edging her way around the Senshi but stopped moving to her wizarding peers when she caught sight of the center of the magical girl group.

There she was. There they were. Harry and Usagi. Alive and everything.

Both were girls at the moment but there were visual cues that were easy to pick up on to anyone that knew Harry. Okay, so having twin brothers made separating anyone doing the whole twin thing ridiculously easy. Usagi was doing the full Crown Princess with silver hair thing and she was just radiating love, joy and happiness. The living Usagi was all that Ginny expected her to be and more. Harry was also everything Ginny expected to see when Usagi finally managed to come back, because, face it: There was no way in all of Creation that this was going to be easy or stress free on the Boy-Who-Lived. He lost his parents, his Godfather, Cedric... he lost so many people in the worst possible ways. This reversal of fortune could only come at great emotional expense, right? If the Gryffindor boy's uniform on the sobbing blonde wasn't a big tell, the sobbing itself was a dead giveaway.

Alas, time waits for no man, nor does it wait for Jusenkyo cursed victims.

"Professor Potter! Harry!" Deputy Headmistress was calling from just inside of the Great Hall.

"_It's time, my Harry. It's time to clean our mess up." _Usagi finished her sentence with a soft kiss to Harry's forehead.

"_I love -sniff- you." _

Harry's blue eyes have yet to leave Usagi since she came back. If she looked away... then, then maybe Usagi might disappear again. Harry would just die if that happened.

"_I love you, Harry, more than I can possibly say."_ A small hint of mischief entered Usagi's gaze. _"Though I do promise to spend the next thousand years or so showing you..."_

Harry's crying jag was interrupted by a wave of giggles. In the background, Professor McGonagall tried to get Harry's attention again. Harry didn't hear her Head of House, but a handful of her group moved to intercept Minerva.

"_You must think me such a girl t__o sob all over you like this." _Harry was trying to bring herself under control, but it was still slow going.

"_Not at all Harry. I love it when a guy brings his feelings to the surface." _ Mischief built itself up again in Usagi's eyes. _"But if I did thin__k you girly for this, welllllll... it so happens that I like girls too. I'd still be into you!"_

"_I should s-switch back now anyway. –snif- Like you said, w-we have a mess to clean up."_ Harry pulled her head off of Usagi's shoulder and smiled through her tears_. "And if w-we want to make us official, we still need that kiss!"_

Harry didn't let go of Usagi, but she did pull out a wand and aim an Aguamenti at her sleeve before heating the now wet cloth. Usagi's cuddle partner grew several inches in several directions.

Usagi had been waiting for just that moment.

Suddenly, Harry felt ten perfect digits snake over his scalp and pull. Usagi's hungry mouth slammed into his with all of the physical desire that she could muster.

As a teenaged girl who was without amorous physical contact for just over a year, she could muster quite a bit.

Harry may have heard some cheering and wolf whistles in the background, but he wasn't paying attention to anything other than the girl in his arms and the tongue in his mouth. Not his tongue, the other one.

When the two lovers finally did separate, the world seemed to come back into focus around them.

"You're Highness. Lord Potter. We have some urgent matters to deal with before the two of you can finish consummating your relationship." Pluto was being all official. Damn, what a downer.

"Everybody! Everybody, please."

Usagi addressed her closest friends and Senshi as she always did. None were excluded from her love and attention when in her presence. The Senshi all straightened their backs and did what they could to push back the tears as they did dozens of times before when Sailor Moon, their Princess, called for it.

"_Pluto is right. We have official business to take care of, _(she looked into her Harry's eyes) _both rewards_ (her gaze moved to where Draco was lying unconscious on the other side of a wall) _and punishments._" The five present Senshi all nodded and accepted her decision. _"Uranus. Neptune. Rear guard, please. Mercury, take us back into the hall__."_

Harry waved over to his friends who had been staying just outside of the magical girl circle.

"Follow us in. You get front row seats to whatever Pluto and Usagi have planned for Malfoy!"

Ron grinned and looked over to Neville. "This is going to be brilliant!"

"Yeah."

Neville wasn't the type to celebrate overmuch, but even he smiled at the thought of his second worst tormentor in school finally getting some real payback. He felt a light tap from his side and looked over see the soft brown eyes of Ginny sparkling away as she grinned and winked at him. Neville's smile got quite a bit wider.

_-BANG-_

Professor McGonagall's noise maker charm exploded in the middle of the Great Hall. All chatter stopped.

From inside the hall, everyone saw their Deputy Headmistress begin walking back to the Head Table. Just after her, Shampoo stepped over to Draco's prone form and stood guard over her prisoner. Then the real show began.

Mercury stepped through the door and walked towards the end of all four house tables opposite the Head Table; she was followed closely by Saturn and Pluto. Small gasps could be heard throughout the Hall as Harry and Usagi once again entered side by side and both clearly alive and solid at the same time. Those students who hadn't clearly seen Usagi's resurrection only minutes ago could now see for themselves that the rumors were indeed true. Neptune and Uranus followed the Royal couple in to round out the Senshi group. Those two were closely followed by Hermione, Ron, Luna, Ginny and Neville.

Albus stood just as Harry and the Moon Princess came up opposite his position.

"I'd like to begin by welcoming Crown Princess Usagi back to the land of the living-"

Whatever the Headmaster wanted to say was drowned out by overwhelming applause and a standing ovation. Even Slytherin House seemed pleased to see the magical Crown Princess resurrected. Harry didn't know what to think about that fact that even the Slytherins were openly supporting... almost worshiping Usagi now that she was officially declared to be both alive and the real thing by Albus Dumbledore. Maybe one day Harry would remember to ask about their version of the Moon Queen story.

Eventually, the applause did die down and Albus took it as a sign to continue.

"For those of you who may not yet have realized just how powerful the white magic of a planetary avatar can be... (pause for dramatic effect) … let's also welcome Myrtle Merryweather back to the land of living."

Oh. My. God.

Harry ignored the loud applause and looked dumbfounded at the young witch who was shyly waving to him from Gryffindor Table. She was sitting between the Creevey brothers and seemed to be wearing Colin's cloak. By the look of her sleeveless arm and bare feet, Harry assumed that the girl was still starkers under the cloak.

They'd have to do something about that. Well, at least someone found a pair of glasses for her.

Usagi squeezed his hand gently as the applause died down again. Albus took his cue again.

"Once again I find myself unable to award points to Gryffindor due to the fact that the young man who brought two young women back to life at the same time is now a member of the teaching staff, Assistant Professor Harry Potter."

With the exception of a handful of Slytherins, the entire student body went wild in recognition of the god-like abilities of their Chosen One. Mere mortals don't bring spirits back from the dead do they? Surely He-Who-Must-Not-Win will snuff it when all is said and done, right?

Harry relied heavily on Usagi's contact to keep himself from either fainting or running out the door. In fact, his brain locked up rather solidly until a soft kiss on the cheek brought him out of his catatonic state. Again, the roar of the student body eventually lessened to a point where the Headmaster felt safe speaking again.

"I suspect that before too long, the name Harry Potter will grace yet another plaque for special services to the school. I wonder if even an Order of Merlin is high enough praise for such a feat. Professor Potter, before you leave Hogwarts today, we will have to meet in private with Miss Merryweather to discuss her current predicament as well as her future... but there is some discipline to be meted out today as well."

Everyone in the Great Hall saw Headmaster Dumbledore turn his gaze to the unconscious Malfoy to Harry's left. Several who were more perceptive than most -cough- Hermione -cough- Pluto -cough- Mercury -cough- noticed Potions Master Slughorn turn a heated glare at Miss Parkinson.

"To begin with points off..."

"Headmaster Dumbledore! Do not even begin to pretend that Draco's actions are a school matter!"

Harry was pissed.

"I beg your pardon, Professor Potter. I do not see how this could be anything other than a-"

"You don't see? You don't see how it could be so?" Harry gave Usagi's hand a quick squeeze as she had been doing for him. "I told you, Albus! I told you after the little shite potioned 'Mione that I wouldn't stand for him going after any of my close friends. Not 'Mione... Not Ginny... Not Luna... and for Christ's sake, was Malfoy really so dense as to attack the woman I'm going to marry?"

"Harry, please-"

"You do not seem to understand the gravity of the situation, Headmaster Dumbledore." Pluto had spoken.

Sailor Pluto stepped up to her Princess and made a slight bow in deference to Usagi before turning to face the Head Table.

"Headmaster Dumbledore. This boy unconscious on the floor is not just a spoilt child in need of discipline. He has attempted to destroy the soul of my sovereign ruler. If you seek to protect him from our justice then you'd better have your excuse ready for when the rest of Magical Britain asks you why we are declaring war upon them."

"Surely you young ladies would not make war on the good people of Britain over one young man in need of proper guidance?" Albus wanted Draco. There was a good soul in that boy just itching to shine through the darkness; there had to be.

"What we do, we do for the Greater Good of all mankind, Headmaster."

That gave the old man pause. Someone was using his line. "How so?"

It was time for a history lesson.

"Over twelve thousand years ago, a great kingdom ruled over the entire solar system from research platforms inside the orbit of Mercury to observatories outside of the orbit of Pluto. Life prospered on or near every planet in between the Sun and the black void of space. This utopia, known to its inhabitants as the Silver Millennium, prospered under Queen Serenity the First of the Royal House of the Moon for more than one thousand years.

"Unfortunately a dark presence grew and spread, carefully hiding itself from the watchful eyes of my Queen and her court. One day, it came to pass that Queen Beryl, a ruler of one of Earth's greater nations, grew jealous of Queen Serenity's power... she also grew jealous of our Princess (Pluto pointed directly to Usagi lest one ignore the story as mere myth about those who lived long ago) who won the love of an Earthly Prince... a prince that Beryl desired for herself.

Without prompting, most wizards and witches in the hall clearly saw the connection to Harry Potter: the beloved of the Moon Princess who was also the central figure in an Earthly power struggle.

"Due to secret dark alliances forged by a jealous, black heart, the Moon Kingdom was attacked without warning and quickly overrun by demonic armies who erased nearly all life in the solar system save some of the population of Earth. Even then, many great nations on Earth were put to the sword with only broken refugees banding together to start the histories you and your non-magical neighbors think of as the dawn of civilization. The birth of your civilization came on the heels of the death of another. Ours.

"Queen Serenity the First sacrificed her own life to protect the future lives of her court and to seal the evil away in an other-dimensional prison. Prison. Not oblivion. Five years ago, the remnants of that dark army broke through to our dimension and renewed their attack on the people of Earth and the Royal House of the Moon. This time, my Princess was the one to sacrifice her life and erase that dark stain from the fabric of existence. She sacrificed her life and then regained it by the power of the Moon.

"I see before me today a man who has had the seed of darkness flushed from his system and yet he still tries to defend another man... one who has repeatedly chosen darkness over light. Malfoy has been given his chance to redeem himself and he threw it away... and now we must act, not only for the safety of our own subjects, but for the good of all life on Earth. Do you not see how this darkness can spread to destroy all peoples and befoul all places? Do you deny the corruption of the pureblood elite who openly embrace the dark and see all others as beneath them? Sub-human? Do you wish to share the same fate as the Silver Millennium?

"It was not our place to combat this threat to Magical Britain before today... but that all changed just a few minutes ago when one of your students attacked my Princess. We will punish Draco Malfoy... and we will also punish the ones who aided him this day. Anyone who aids the dark... anyone who sides with Tom Riddle and does not see the light for themselves will be defeated."

At the other end of the Great Hall, Pansy Parkinson paled, color draining from her face as implications set in. A shaking hand snuck under the table to grasp her wand.

The rest of the Great Hall watched Pluto have a short whispered conversation with Harry and Usagi before she nodded, took a step back and motioned towards Shampoo. The Amazon was too too happy to grab her prisoner by the ankle and drag him before the royal couple.

As Shampoo gleefully delivered the prisoner to justice, Uranus heard something. The blonde Senshi relaxed a bit upon realizing that Mars, Venus and Ranma were now quietly entering the Great Hall directly behind Harry. Usagi briefly looked over her shoulder to the three and winked.

Of course, all three were shocked silent to see Usagi quite alive, Ranma doubly so when he noticed the living Miss Merryweather not far away.

As Shampoo grabbed Draco roughly by his biceps and pulled the blonde pureblood up, Harry cast enervate. Draco's eyes snapped open.

As one of Shampoo's pressure point strikes earlier was keyed to consciousness, it activated, releasing the contents of Malfoy's bladder into his trousers. His bowels released a moment later. Shampoo took the opportunity to whisper into her captive's ear, "You will never be able to hold anything in again, ever. Can you guess what else I did to you?"

"Draco Malfoy." Usagi spoke up. "Have you anything to say before I pass judgment on you for your actions today?"

Draco may not have totally recovered from his little nap, but he did see his long time rival and some witch or other that could pass as a living Moon Princess. Keep pretending, you slag.

"Enjoy life while you can, Scarhead. You can't hide from the Dark Lord. Soon he will extend his reach into this castle and I will laugh as all of your pathetic mudblood and blood traitor friends die slowly and painfully." Draco displayed his best superior smirk and looked right at Usagi. "Though I suppose that I might convince him to allow some to continue on as servants were I to be properly… (Draco's eyes slid up and down Usagi's form for a moment) …motivated."

"Now _**this**_, Headmaster, is why you should have let me wipe all of Slytherin House clean with Lunar magic when I had the chance. Malfoy might have actually turned like Snape did." Left unsaid was Harry's firm belief that the same happened to Albus himself, but they don't need to go back to that argument in front of the entire Hogwarts student body. "Now Malfoy's fate is out of your hands."

Draco started to interrupt, but an un-subtle squeeze by his purple haired captor flooded his senses with fresh pain and removed his ability to think straight.

Usagi had seen and heard enough. It was time to act like the queen she always dreamed of becoming. It was time to pronounce Malfoy's sentence.

"Draco Malfoy. Even knowing what my Senshi and my future husband have said, I would give you chance for redemption… but for one thing. Your actions this morning have two victim I think. Venus!"

"Yes, Princess?" The blonde Senshi in orange responded.

"Nick and Peeves were taken by rock. Are they free again?"

"I am sorry, my Princess. The spirits are lost to us as far as I can tell."

"Pluto?"

"Venus is correct, Your Highness. The ghosts trapped by the stone are lost to this plain of existence."

Pluto loved her powers. Even in the middle of a crowded room, she could leave and visit the Gate for hours reviewing what actually happened. She could then return to the same crowded room at the exact time she left without anyone realizing she had done anything other than just stand by her Princess and look hot.

Usagi remembered her whispered conversation with Pluto and one option the older Senshi favored above others.

"Draco Malfoy, you are Banished. Pluto, carry out the sentence."

Pluto took a step forward and nodded to Shampoo who released the young wizard. He immediately made to leap at Harry only to catch the butt end of Pluto's Garnet Rod in the chest.

Without so much as a 'pop' Draco Malfoy disappeared.

Silence filled the Great Hall of Hogwarts. You could have heard a house-elf pop in.

"May I ask," Headmaster Dumbledore broke the silence, "where you banished him to?"

"Nemesis." Pluto answered.

"Nemesis?"

"The planet Nemesis, yes."

Albus looked over to Professor Sinistra, who seemed just as confused as he was.

"I'm afraid I don't know that one, miss. Could you tell me where Nemesis is?"

"Nemesis is… or rather was between Mars and Jupiter until Sailor Saturn had to Silence the entire planet during the Great Fall. It's an asteroid field now. I sent him to one of the larger remnants of the planet. One that modern astronomers now call Ceres."

Albus felt years older. Not only had he failed to bring Draco back to the light, but the young man was now out of his grasp entirely. The Senshi won't need to keep wards or other protections active around their prisoner as he was literally too far away to retrieve by wizarding means. Even Fawkes wouldn't be able to find one boy somewhere amongst the stars.

"I trust that we are done banishing schoolchildren to distant planets now?"

The young wizards and witches of Hogwarts who were about to start whispering and gossiping again suddenly stopped. The drama was not yet over.

"If Pansy Parkinson is willing to stay inside of Hogwarts Castle until Tom Riddle is dead, then we are. This is her second chance. There will not be a third." Pluto's response was sharp and uncompromising.

Albus turned his head to the witch in question only to find that she was pale and shaking like a leaf. Pansy may have loved Draco with all of her heart but she was not about to be banished to some Hell she'd never even heard of just for him. Surely, she could wait out the war in the comfort of the Slytherin Common Room and then see about retrieving Draco.

"P-permission…" Pansy choked on her request and tried again. "May I change my holiday plans and stay in the castle, Headmaster?"

"Yes, of course. You'd better send your parents a letter to that effect soon."

"Yes, Headmaster."

Albus turned away from Pansy to once again address the room as a whole. "Well, wasn't that an exciting way to start the day?"

Students finally dared to whisper amongst each other again. Was the big show finally over?

"If Professor Potter, his party and Miss Merryweather could see to meeting with me in the antechamber to my right, I would appreciate it. For the rest of you… you have one hour to board the Hogwarts Express if you are taking it. I wish you all a very merry Christmas, happy Hanukkah, a delightful Saturnalia, warm Yule tidings and a happy New Year."

Suddenly noise and motion ruled the Great Hall. As Harry, Usagi and their multinational party of friends and loved ones made its way up the Gryffindor side of the Great Hall, all of the other students either stared openly at Harry and his Princess or they discussed the incredible awesomeness that was a double resurrection followed by a banishing. Oh, and a lot of them saw the Moon Princess naked. Oh, and those same ones say Harry in his girl form naked when (s)he did that naked dancy-change thing. Breasts! Natural hair color! Harry and the green haired sex goddess with the giant fancy key both yelled at Headmaster Dumbledore! Just wait 'till the Daily Prophet hears about this!

"Harry!"

"Myrtle!"

The once and future Ravenclaw jumped onto her savior and hugged him for all she was worth. As she was still stark naked under her boyfriend's cloak, that hug was worth a bit more than usual.

"Ohhhhhhh! Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you Harry!" Myrtle finished her greeting with a double cheek kiss with extra slobber.

"You're quite welcome, Myrtle. Anything for a friend."

"Harry!" A hand came down on his arm. "However did you do it?"

"Hey, Colin. All I can say is that all you need is love."

"All you need is love? Someone's a Beatles fan, I see."

"I suppose I am at that."

Usagi stretched her chin over Harry's shoulder to greet her co-ex-spectre.

"Hi, Myrtle!"

"Usagi! Look at you, all dolled up!"

Myrtle detached herself from Harry and re-applied her super hug to Usagi.

"Who are the Beatles, anyway?" Wait, what?

"A muggleborn that doesn't know who the Beatles are?" Harry stopped himself for a moment. "Oh, that's right… you died before their time. Say, what's the last thing about the non-magical world that you remember from before your passing on?"

"I remember Montgomery kicking the Nazi's out of Africa and something about the Americans and Japanese tearing each other apart in the Pacific somewhere… not sure where ." Myrtle drifted off in thought for a moment.

"New subject please? Why you not wearing clothes, Myrtle?"

Of course the Tokyo-born girl would not want to dwell on such things even if Myrtle was the best preserved war relic on Earth today.

"Oh! Right. Well, I don't really have anything to call my own, now do I?"

Myrtle's smile fell for the first time since her new heart started beating again.

"Oh, I wouldn't say that, Miss Merryweather."

The ex-ghost started at her Headmaster's voice. She hadn't even noticed that everyone was assembled in the antechamber as requested. Albus Dumbledore was at the far end of a large round table which currently filled the center of the room and forced everyone to walk around it's edges.

"I have been holding on to some of your things for quite some time, my dear."

Albus raised his hand and caused a school trunk to appear on the table between them.

"Is... is that my trunk, Headmaster?"

Myrtle's eyes were getting misty. The wear and tear around the trunk did in fact look very familiar.

"It is... and this is yours as well." Albus pulled a wand out of his robes and held it out for Myrtle to see. "Eleven inches... holly and unicorn hair if I remember correctly."

"I... I..."

"Go on, Myrtle. Take it." Usagi wanted to see her sister-in-death regain that which had been take from her fifty years ago.

Myrtle did take it and a shower of silver sparks flew out of the wand to welcome its witch once again.

Albus took Myrtle's shocked silence as a sign to continue on.

"You will find, my dear, that all of your things are still in the trunk. Clothes, texts, school supplies... I daresay an unfinished essay or two... but if you find yourself lacking, then tell me. Hogwarts owes you much for your tragic past and you will not lack for anything until you graduate with your N.E.W.T.s solidly behind you. You are, of course, returning to fifth year, are you not?"

"Um... oh, yes, Headmaster. I thank you very kindly." She looked between Albus and Colin, who had followed her in. "I... I don't suppose you know what is to become of me? It's not like I can just go home, is it?"

Colin placed his hand on one shoulder as Usagi did the same.

"I'm afraid not. Your parents are no longer with us and your closest relative is still quite distant... and rather old as well. I am afraid that I shall have to classify you as an orphan and a ward of Hogwarts for the moment."

Myrtle seemed to deflate yet again. She wasn't moaning but the potential was there.

"Sir. I'd like to offer Myrtle a place at my home for the holidays."

That was unexpected.

"Are you sure, Colin?" Albus looked at the fifth year Gryffindor. "What of your parents? Won't you need their permission?"

Colin smiled.

"I think that if Myrtle were to come home with me, that she could learn to reacquaint herself with the muggle world as it's easily as different from the muggle world of the Nineteen forties as both muggle times are from the wizarding world. She'll need to learn about all that's changed."

"And your Mum?" Myrtle asked. This was a very serious question no matter what decade you were born into.

Colin smiled in a very Fred and George kind of way.

"I think that Mum was getting a bit concerned that I was light in the loafers. I spent my first three years sending home letters that mentioned how wonderful Harry Potter was." Luna and Hermione both had to ruthlessly suppress giggle fits with limited success. "I'm pretty sure that if I took Myrtle home to meet my Mum that the two of them would kick me, Dad and Dennis out of the house to start planning a wedding."

"W-wedding? Really?" Myrtle let the tears flow, but they were nothing like her usual waterworks. These were tears of joy.

"I know I'm too young to ask, but a boy can dream, can't he?"

Rather than answer, Myrtle just curled up against her very serious boyfriend and cried silently onto his shoulder.

"Professor Potter."

"Class is out, Albus. You can do better than that, can't you?"

"Indeed. Thank you, Harry. Now on to business..." The others around Albus... those who were not crying tears of joy or being cried on anyway... became alert and took notice of the Headmaster for any signs of conflict.

"While I am sure the Moon Kingdom has its own way of thanking young men who bring their young women back to life (Usagi got a wicked gleam in her eye. Oh, yes... she was going to thank his brains out tonight!) there is by some odd coincidence a law about it here in Magical England."

Everyone was listening now. This could be really, really good or it could be really, really bad.

"In effect, you have four options available to you, Harry."

"Four? In the history of England, has this ever happened before?"

"No, it hasn't Harry. By now you should realize that not all Wizengamot approved laws are useful or even logical."

Harry snorted at that one. "So what are my options then?"

Albus composed himself and waited for Harry to pick up an ice water that the house elves had just delivered.

"Your first option is to take her as your concubine."

Spit-take. Hermione and Ginny were now wearing Harry's water.

"Not happening! Next."

"You can make her Myrtle Potter, your wife..."

"Next!"

"You can make her Myrtle Potter, your sister..."

"That... has potential." Harry looked into Myrtle's eyes. He couldn't tell what she thought about it. "Let's hear the last one."

"You can make her Myrtle Potter, your daughter..."

Harry turned his gaze to Usagi, the future mother of his true daughter Cuteness.

"I'm afraid _that_ honor is reserved for a delightful young lady that Usagi will bless me with at some point in the future." Usagi's eyes got moist and she couldn't keep from smiling. Harry turned back to Myrtle. "Sister it is. Welcome to the family, Myrtle luv."

As Myrtle once more switched targets, Harry's water spilled and he became a she once more.

"Look! I get a sister out of the deal! Brilliant!"

Harry grunted under the assault.

"And I... I get to walk you down the aisle and I get to ask you where you've been young lady and I get to sit Colin down and have a dark, scary conversation with him about what will happen if he hurts you-"

"And we will be in-laws soon! Brilliant, yes?"

Usagi had jumped on the pile and for a minute or two the whole room was a happy, low key party.

"Oh! Announcement time! Announcement time!" Usagi hopped up and down a few times and thumped the table for good measure. "I, as Crown Princess of Moon, want to make official declarations now!"

Even Pluto was caught off guard by this move of her Princess. Must be due to the three Jusenkyo victims adding a little chaos to the room.

"First. I wanting to thank all of Harry's English friends for keeping him alive long enough to fall in Chinese magic spring last summer. If Harry not fall in and not call on powers of Sailor Moon when fighting dirty stinky Chinese Prince Herb, I not getting out of pool soon... maybe not ever. To you I give honor of friendship of Royal House of the Moon. Anything you ever need, just ask.

"Second, I wanting to thank Ranma and Shampoo. You are good friends to Harry in Jusenkyo valley and good friends are worth more than their weight in gold. To Ranma and Shampoo, I also give friendship of Royal House of the Moon.

"Third, Ranma again. You grab the rock when it almost kill Uranus who grab it before you. You took rock outside and blow it to Hell just like you claimed you would. You help Harry save me and my one day sister-in-law Myrtle from terrible fate..."

Usagi looked over at Harry and winked. She remembered Ranma's history of girl troubles and just couldn't resist this next bit. Usagi spread her arms wide in a gesture meant to highlight the Senshi as a whole.

"_Ranma pick any Senshi you want. She is your new fiancee!"_

Ranma went white and fell into a chair. Shampoo went red and began to growl. Venus threw her hand up into the air.

"_Oh, me! Pick me! I'm athletic and I'm a good singer and I like to go dancing and I like having fun in the city and I'm super cool with you becoming a girl and I know a few good tricks in bed that I bet you haven't seen before-"_

"_Kidding! It was a prank! Really, Venus... we are going to have to ge__t you a man sometime soon..." _ Usagi turned back to Ranma and Shampoo who were seconds from running out of Hogwarts in all due haste. _"I was kidding, Ranma. In truth, I do hereby declare you to be an Ally of Royal House of the Moon. This honor is suppos__ed to make you and your loved ones allies of the Moon Kingdom from today until the end of time. This honor really means that if we are at the same party, the first one of us to leave MUST seek out the other for a goodbye hug!"_

"_Hug... yeah, a hug. I can__ do that. Great." _ Ranma pulled himself... herself after meeting up with a glass of water during his fall to the floor... back up to the table and tried to calm down. She was having Nerima flashbacks and they weren't good ones.

"_Princess? Will you find__ a man for me too?"_

Poor Saturn. With her occasional poor health and her social outcast status, finding a good mate for her would be quite the challenge.

"_Yes, Saturn. I promise you we will find your Prince Charming... even if I have to blackmail Pluto into telling us who it is early just so we know where to look!"_

Hermione whispered in Luna's ear, "What just happened?"

"A prank. Something about arranged marriages. I can't wait to hear the story behind that one..." Luna turned from Hermione to look at Ginny. "Now that Harry's brought two girls back from the dead, are you going to turn his fan club into an official religion?"

"Wait... what's this about a Harry Potter fan club?" Harry hadn't heard about that before.

"Can we not talk about this now? I don't want to miss the Express." Ginny prayed to Circe for someone to help keep Harry ignorant of the Harry James Potter is Dreamy Fan Club that she still holds the rank of High Sorceress in.

"Though I would also like to hear about this club... Miss Weasley is correct. I believe our impromptu meeting is adjourned." Albus looked over to Pluto. "Will your group require assistance getting home?"

"Thank you, but no, Headmaster. We are quite capable of returning to Japan on our own."

As the group began to break up and say their goodbyes to each other, Harry discreetly moved over to Pluto to check on one issue.

"Pluto... I just wanted to make sure that we had some place for 'Mione on account of her being with us the whole time..."

"Don't worry about it, Harry. I'll take care of your friends whenever they come by." She patted the boy-turned-girl lightly on the shoulder before adding a bit of advice. "Make sure they know they can cast any magic they want... the locals will stop and stare... maybe ask for pictures and autographs at times, but it won't cause you much trouble."

"Thanks, Pluto."

Pluto moved over to her Princess and whispered a few lines into her ear. Usagi smiled and nodded in confirmation of something or other, not that Harry could tell what.

"_Everyone! Everyone, please... now that everyone else is out of the room... it's time for me to 'change'." _

Indeed, the only locals in the room were now Harry and Hermione. Usagi held aloft a magical item Harry didn't recognize, a compact of some sort, and shouted her transformation phrase.

"Moon Crisis, Make-up!"

As Princess Serenity changed into Sailor Moon in a fountain of magical lights, Harry stopped to admire the show. This was the first time she got to see exactly what it was that she'd been doing... in front of... in front of others... oh, bloody hell. By the time Sailor Moon was posing heroically for her cheering Senshi, Harry felt like she was going to be ill. Just how many people had seen her do that now? Hundreds?

A broach of some sort was shoved into Harry's limp hand.

"_Your turn, my Harry."_

Huh?

The girls were all smiling in his direction. Even Hermione after Venus translated for her. Pluto chose to explain.

"_Harry... the Sailor Teleport isn't really meant for carrying multiple passengers. It would be best if only one passenger were carried and everyone else helped power the teleport. You and Hermione can stay with your fiancee and I will take Ranma and Shampoo with me via my own powers."_

Harry huffed. _ "Fine. But this isn't what she used to change, is it?"_

More giggles.

"_My Harry. This is the first broach I used when I first become Sailor Moon at fourteen. I want to see you in my old uniform." _ Even more giggles. _"You're going to look sooooo cute!"_

Harry looked down at the broach in her hand. It was girly. Very, very girly. Oh, well... it's not like she hadn't done this already...

Harry held the broach in front of her and called out words of power which seemed to originate within the broach itself.

"Moon Prism Power, Make-up!"

And now there were two Sailor Moons in the room.

"Aaaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" Sailor Moon, the real Sailor Moon, pointed and laughed at her husband to be. _"I can't believe that actually worked!"_

As one Sailor Moon continued to laugh and snort in a most unladylike fashion, the other Sailor Moon tried her hand at the sweat drop technique. Success. Apparently any Sailor Moon could sweat drop like the best of them.

"_You owe me five hundred yen, Sailor Moon."_ Pluto cut in.

With that statement, Moon's buzz was totally killed and she went quiet. Moon One turned to Moon Two, pulled her hands together under her chin and unleashed her best puppydog eye attack.

"_Harry Love. That meanie Pluto went and tricked me into owing her money when I haven't got a yen to my name. Can you give me five hundred yen?"_

After a few more rounds of girlish giggling and a few 'welcome back's. Hermione spoke up.

"Harry? Shouldn't we be getting our trunks? I know we're not taking the Express, but I can't imagine leaving with nothing but the clothes on our backs."

One of the Sailor Moons, the one with a red, blue and gold color scheme as compared to the more intricate one with yellow and pink highlights that Hermione had already gotten used to, turned to the Gryffindor witch.

"Dobby! Kreacher!"

POP POP

"What can Dobby be doing for Lord Professor Sailor Harry Potter Moon, miss?" "Kreacher is here to serve."

"Can you two get my and Hermione's trunks and follow us to Japan?

"Yes, Lord Professor Sailor Harry Potter Moon, miss!" "Kreacher will do as he is told, Lord Potter."

POP POP

"_Where can I get one of those?" _ Uranus really hated housework. On second thought... _"Do they repair and detail motorcycles?"_

"_I'll ask for you, but later, okay?" _Uranus nodded eagerly at the English (yes, yes... Welsh actually) Moon.

"_Okay, ladies! Let's leave in style! We'll be walking out to the main courtyard one at a time to make the local boys drool. With any luck, we'll teleport out in front of the whole school."_

Sailor Moon ignored her husband-to-be's complaints about not actually wanting to make other boys drool. Most of the others were only too happy to saunter and sashay past a castle full of potential boyfriend and/or girlfriend material. Hermione didn't mind so much as long as she got to leave with them. Ranma secretly agreed with Harry, but was experienced enough to realize that whining did not help.

"'Mione! Will you hold my hand on the way out? I want people to know which of us is really a bloke."

"I don't think it'll work, Harry, but I'll hold your hand anyway."

"Thanks, 'Mione."

After a little more teasing and prodding, the all female Anglo-Sino-Japanese group walked out. Sailor Harry-Moon and Hermione lead the procession hand in hand. Behind the two English natives came Mercury, Venus, Moon, Mars, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune and Pluto. Ranma and Shampoo trailed the group out hand in hand, acting as a visual balance to the couple at the head of the line. Before coming out, Moon had asked Hermione if she wanted to use the Disguise Pen to fit in better... Sailor England or Sun... Earth or Nemesis even. While they had left Jupiter in Tokyo, Moon had no intention of replacing Makoto for this. Hermione blushed and politely refused, her proper conservative English middle-class upbringing barred her from such a public display even if Harry thought she'd be 'dead sexy' in a Senshi fuku. Maybe next Halloween... or in private...

The walk outside was just as embarrassing as the spare Sailor Moon feared. Her procession passed through a still occupied Great Hall, through the adjacent (and crowded) Entry Hall and into the heavily populated courtyard where students were cueing up for carriages. At first, there were the looks of surprise. These were followed by much gossip and milling about as the boys began to toss out a few comments which were at times flattering, flirtatious or downright slap-worthy. The occasional 'slag' or racial slur seemed to come from several of the witches... the same ones who were harsh on Fleur Delacour two years prior. Finally, they reached a clear section of grass and began to form a circle with Hermione standing in the center. Only Pluto, Ranma and Shampoo stayed outside of the group.

With nearly the whole of the student population following the Senshi out, Sailor Moon took charge once more.

_"Join hands, girls. Harry, that means you too!"_

Harry tried to remember a day in Tokyo where all of the girls giggled this much and couldn't. She was only now really beginning to understand what it meant for Sailor Moon to drown. She was the leader, their Princess, and every single one of them loved her for it.

"Harry! You need to concentrate with us. Focus on your connection to the Moon and to the others in our circle. Focus on your destination which is... which is... Pluto?"

"May I suggest the courtyard of Juuban High School? You have five minutes before the kendo club crosses the courtyard." Moon nodded to Pluto's suggestion. She's really going home! "I'll take Ranma and Shampoo straight to my bedroom so we can make sure that Jupiter and Cuteness are ready to greet you properly."

Two Sailor Moons shared the exact same thought at the exact same time. 'Cuteness! Oh Cuteness, I'm coming!'

"You haven't been there, Harry, so you should let us drive this time. Hermione! Just relax and don't do anything other than enjoy the ride!"

Hermione saw the nervous yet determined expression on Harry's face and tried to hide her own apprehension. Maybe Harry could have tried one of those long distance apparations again? And given Hermione a ride?

Too late. The circle of Senshi had all pulled together, linked hands and closed their eyes. Hermione could feel it in the air... they had already started the magic. Soon every girl in the circle was surrounded by soft clouds of magical light that seemed to float lazily up into the air around them. Hermione felt a bit light somehow... her eyes widened as she saw the hair and cloth begin to lift into the air all around her. Was gravity being negated or reversed? The air around her felt thick with magical power.

"Sailor..."

Each of the Senshi circled around Hermione said this word in unison, even the gender bending spare Sailor Moon who had never done this before. Small clods of dirt and stones began to pull off of the ground in a tight ring around the glowing girls. Was it hard wired into all Senshi regardless of how they came by their powers?

"Teleport!"

Hermione felt a heavy dose of _something_ pass through her being. The magical glows around each girl flared brilliantly and extended into the clear sky above them for countless thousands of meters. For the briefest of moments, there was nothing outside of the ring of teenaged mahou shoujo and then... and then they were at another school. In Japan. At sunset.

"Welcome to Tokyo, Japan, Hermione. I think you will like it here." Sailor Moon spoke up as she released the hands of her fellow Senshi. _"To Pluto's place everybody! You all go on ahead. I'll lead Harry and Hermione there on a broom ride."_

"_Can I change back now?" _Sailor Harry-Moon was trying not to whine about it, but her question still came out very whine like.

Thank Merlin! Usagi finally nodded yes! As six girls leapt away from Juuban High's courtyard towards the beginnings of a grand welcome home party Harry quickly reversed her transformation. Now there was only one Sailor Moon and two Hogwarts students standing in the courtyard.

"Are you going to change back into a boy now, Harry?" Hermione put one hand in her robes to retrieve and expand her Nimbus.

"No. They haven't seen 'Harry Potter' around here. I feel like Heather Snape needs to say hello to an old friend. If we're lucky, we might get to beat down some thugs between here and Setsuna's place."

After freeing her first wand from concealment, Harry had her eyes red and her hair pink moments later. Two golden kanzashi appeared in her hands and Heather Snape's signature bun and braid pattern sprang into being in a trice. Finally, Harry pulled her Firebolt out of storage and expanded it for use.

"May I offer you a ride, Sailor Moon?" Harry grinned roguishly.

"Are you asking me to mount your long, hard shaft, my Harry?" Moon grinned as Harry and Hermione both blushed at the implication.

"Err... yeah?"

"In that case, I accept."

With forty-eight seconds to spare before the kendo club appeared in Juuban High's courtyard, Harry hit the three of them with Heather Snape's patented sneaky witch concealment charms and off they went.

Every few blocks, the group would slow down to re-orient themselves or to just see the sights. While both Harry and Sailor Moon had seen Tokyo from this vantage point before, Hermione had never seen the city at all and the sheer energy of it all was keeping her wound up and on a mental high. There was also magical jet-lag to consider as she, Usagi and Harry had just lost nine hours of daylight. Hermione briefly wondered if the ex-ghost would even notice.

In spite of their mutual desire to see Cuteness, Harry, Sailor Moon and Hermione were all disappointed at how short the broom ride actually was. There was so much to see, hear and smell in the early evening. On Harry and Moon's broom, there was also a lot more to feel. Blood was pumping fiercely; desire was causing their blood to boil. Harry briefly considered landing at a love hotel when she saw it right below them; only thoughts of seeing her daughter again stopped them from practicing conception techniques early. Too, too soon, the three were dismounting on a sidewalk outside of Setsuna's front door.

Cuteness was less than thirty meters away.

Two brooms were shrunk and stowed away. After a brief scan of their surroundings, Harry canceled all of her concealment charms. Nervous tension mounted as three teens neared the front door. Nervously, Harry pulled out the kanzashi and then used her wand to reverse hair and eye charms. She transfigured a stone near the front porch into a goblet and filled it with water before heating the whole thing. Instant boy.

Harry nervously looked over to Moon. She seemed to be shaking... or maybe that was him. He lifted his hand.

_**Knock-Knock-Knock**_

For a half second, the world seemed to slow to a halt in Harry's mind. There was him, his hand and the door.

Suddenly, Harry heard the sounds of metal on metal between the loud thumps of his own heart as the doorknob jiggled.

-click-

Pluto's front door was nearly ripped off its hinges by a nine(hundred and thirty-eight) year old girl with beautiful red eyes and long candy pink hair. She was crying and wearing the broach her Daddy gave her before he went away and oh she just looked so sweet and beautiful and-

"_MOMMA!"_

Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter latched on to her Momma's waist and started to cry out a year of sadness and misery. Seconds later, Sailor Moon followed her lead and rained tears onto her daughter's scalp.

"_Oh... oh, baby... I'm so sorry I left you..." _

All of the other Senshi, who had all gone civilian by now, watched silently as the tearful reunion slowly moved past the threshold and indoors. Harry wasn't crying, but he was suspiciously red in the face as he slowly closed the door after passing through.

"_Usagi! Ohmygodit'ssogoodtoseeyouagain!"_

Makoto grabbed both Cuteness and Moon into a hug as the last Senshi to see her Princess return showed that she was as happy as the rest of them.

"_Group hug!"_

Hotaru slammed into Cuteness from the side. Fearing that the girls would all block him from getting his quality father-daughter greetings in, Harry attached himself on the other side. Soon, Minako, Ami and Rei all joined in on the hug. The others either felt a little to awkward to join in, like Hermione, or a little too mature to do it, like Setsuna.

"_Who's grabbing my ass? Harry? Is that your hand on my ass? It better be."_

Makoto was still feeling a little short changed for not getting a date with Harry last summer, especially since Minako told her all of the juicy bits of her date and it's fantastic finale in excruciating detail.

From the other side of the mahou shoujo group love session, Setsuna waived Hermione over and offered her some cookies and punch.

"Welcome to Tokyo, Miss Granger. I hope you will find your stay an enjoyable one."

"Thank you ever so much. Please call me Hermione… I hope to become good friends with all of you very soon."

Hermione held out her hand and Setsuna shook it.

"And I'm Setsuna from now on, Hermione. Thank you again for showing us all around London before, by the way. I hope you don't mind eating take-out tonight as _someone_ decided to mess up Makoto's cooking schedule and get resurrected."

Hermione smiled and picked up a cup of punch. Let the party begin.

Four hours later, Harry carried an unconscious little girl into her bedroom with Princess Serenity trailing behind him ready to help. She had switched back to her royal dress a while ago to fit in better at the party downstairs. After ten minutes of tucking Cuteness in and just watching her sleep, Harry and Usagi quietly left their daughter to sleep peacefully under the protective glow of her Daddy's magical broach.

"Ready to go?" Setsuna was waiting for them in the hall. Hermione, Ranma and Shampoo were right behind her.

"We're not sleeping here? I suppose four guests are a little much, yeah?"

"Exactly. Add to that the guests you invited for a stay after Christmas and I absolutely had to rent out another house." Setsuna saw the guilty look on Harry's face.

"Don't worry about it, Harry. I'm rich and so are you. If anything of value on the Moon or any other planet survived the Great Fall, then Usagi should still have more gold than God. Besides, you are just going to love the place I found." Setsuna turned to Ranma and Shampoo. "Especially you two. You've both been there before."

Setsuna retrieved her Garnet Rod without changing into Pluto, just as she had in Grimmauld Place before.

"Everyone grab hold."

Five more hands touched the elaborate golden key. When Setsuna was satisfied that they were all holding on, she willed them all to a new location. The trip was as quick as a Sailor Teleport but with none of the theatrics.

"Why can't all magical transport be that smooth?"

"Crap! What are we doing in old man Tendo's house?" Ranma tensed up and began to prepare himself for possible battles.

Setsuna laughed.

"Relax, Ranma. The sisters all moved out years ago and Soun is spending this Christmas season with Kasumi and her family. Little Kimiko learned her first word just last week, you know."

"R-really?"

"Really. I rented out the Tendo compound. You and Shampoo can take your old room… Hermione will sleep in Kasumi's and Harry and Usagi will take Soun's room. If anyone wants to do a slumber party later on, the dojo would be perfect after a few warming charms are cast on the floor."

Setsuna had pointed out each room's door in turn. As the two young twenty-somethings and three teenagers took tentative looks into their designated rooms, Setsuna quietly disappeared behind them.

"Setsuna? Hey, Set- damn, where'd she go?" Harry was nervous again.

"She disappear again, my Harry. She do that all the time to us. You are no different for her."

"Umn, Harry? Our trunks?" Hermione had a few glasses of wine during the party and was actually looking forward to a good nap… or a night's sleep… whatever she could get.

"Right. Dobby?" Harry called.

POP

"Dobby is here! What does Professor Lord Harry Potter wish of Dobby?"

Harry pointed to the two rooms that the teens would be sleeping in. "Can you put Hermione's trunk in that room and my trunk in that room over there, Dobby?"

"Oh, yes! Dobby is being doing as Lord Harry James Potter Sir is wanting!"

The elf snapped his fingers and two trunks appeared floating in the hall before him. He then waved his hands in two directions and the trunks moved into the rooms specified.

Harry missed Dobby popping out of the hall when a door behind him closed unexpectedly.

"Hey, did Ranma and Shampoo…?" Harry started.

"Get tired of waiting and go to bed, yes they did. I'm dead on my feet, Harry. Give us a kiss goodnight will you?" Harry held the gently swaying witch steady and gave her a peck on the cheek.

"I love you Harry. I always have, you know."

"As I have always loved you, 'Mione. I just didn't know it before. Of course it took a dip in a magical spring that turned me into a girl to get me in touch with my feelings. Go to bed, luv."

Hermione let out a tipsy giggle and waved happily at the magical Princess behind Harry.

"Thank you for not really taking Harry away, Usagi. I don't know what I'd do if I lost him, you know. I'd probably try to steal Ron away from Lavender… God, how pathetic would that be?"

"Thank you for giving him to me, Hermione. You could have tried to fight me away and you did not. I promise we will never push you away. You are in Harry's heart and now you are in my heart too." Usagi stepped around Harry and gave Hermione a tight hug. "See you in the morning."

There was one last round of 'good night's' before two doors were closed for the evening.

Alone at last.

"Ohhhhh, Haaaaa-rrryyyyyyy……" Princess Usagi swayed her hips as she walked away from Harry and to the bed in the middle of the room.

Harry didn't need a Callipygian Venus bracelet's magical influence to lose himself in the arse rocking back and forth before his eyes.

"Er, yeah?"

Still facing away from him, Princess Serenity let the magical transformation drop. For the first time since her resurrection, Usagi was just Usagi again. She slowly mounted the bed and moved to the middle on all fours, still looking directly away from him.

"You like what you see, my Harry?"

Oh, yeah. She was still naked. The two outfits she'd been wearing today were purely magical in nature. Once the magic was released, there was nothing but skin. Usagi settled back into a sitting position with her feet under her tight bottom and looked back at Harry over one shoulder.

"Take me, my Harry. I am yours, now and forever."

Harry couldn't respond in words. That part of his brain shut down and others took over. Just as well; he didn't need words to do as he was told and take what Usagi was offering.

Hermione was lucky that those three glasses of wine could knock her out and make her dead to the world. The walls of the Tendo home were fairly thin and Harry was way too distracted by exposed skin to think of erecting privacy wards.

That night, Hermione had a dream where she, Harry and Usagi were all playing very grown-up games in one room while a group of children constantly knocked on the door and tried to convince their parents to let them in. The children were supposed to be watching a martial arts program staring Shampoo but had somehow lost interest. While Hermione never saw the other side of the door, she just knew that there was a pink haired, red eyed girl who should be old enough to guess at what the adults were doing along with a smaller blonde girl with green eyes and a similarly young boy with green eyes and bushy brown hair. It was a very nice dream.

**Chapter End**

Chapter Notes:

I may have taken more liberties with the Sailor Moon background history this time than usual. As far as I can tell, that part of the Sailor Moon universe is fairly vague and indistinct anyway, so I don't feel bad tweaking it to my own ends.

I have finally gotten to the point in the story where Harry not knowing the Moon Queen fable of the Wizarding World is more than just a reoccurring joke. If he knew it, he might be able to use it to his advantage.

Reviewers:

**Anon –** Mr. Anonymous, Sir, you will be delighted to hear that Harry will not lose his curse for a very long time. Only a Moon Queen could do it and she'd have to realize that she can and she'd have to want to.

**The Fanfic Stealer –** Now I see the 'Partially Kissed Hero' bit even if it was subconscious when I did it. That story is great and worthy of respect, but can be hard to read in places. My brain tends to lock up if a story gets to that special level of detail that WoW addicts, AD&D supernerds and Pokemon masters thrive on.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** Revisiting that scene would probably add a lot of length to it at a time that I need to write other things. If I set it on the back shelf for now, maybe the answer will pop out later.

**The Wandering Soul of 1014 –** If the Senshi hadn't gotten some kind of warning, then Jusenkyo may have killed the future just as Pluto always feared it could... by simple background interference. It's personal now. For Love and Justice, Voldie's ass is toast.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** I was quite happy with the chipper-shredder line, myself.

**Jokulhaup – **And I even moved it up from it's first scheduled time of happening during the Yule Ball itself. That chapter will be way to action packed even without this bit.

**deltawaves –** If you still want to wait impatiently for someone to rise from the dead, you can do so in my other active story!

**Jetler – **The note may have burned to ash, but the Gates of Time and Space are useful like that even if I may be stretching Pluto's powers just a bit. Not much if at all, really.

**nxkris – **This chapter answered your question! Now the new question is can both Sailor Moons be the same version or will Harry always have to use a weaker version than whatever Usagi's using.

**ariel stormcloud –** Thanks!

**Fire From Above –** I give you Draco Malfoy: a bitter and tortured soul that founds the Black Moon Clan! In my version of the story, if people don't get banished to Nemesis (Ceres) then the BMC can't grow to attack our Pretty Sailor Senshi in the future in the past... or something.

**Mojii – **See response to FFA. Draco will suffer. Suffering leads to hate. Hate leads to the Dark Side!

**lordamnesia –** Not that I see the need to add the stone's backstory, but if I did, then I would explain how it is a shard broken off of the Veil. Just like with the Veil in the D.O.M., you will never really know what happens to the spirits who pass through.

**Jimm –** Thank _you._

**Wayne82444 – **Yes, in order to retain the title of Ghost Pimp, Harry would now need to negotiate with the Grey Lady.

**WhiteElfElder – **The Bridal Planning Committee will be a force to be reckonned with, no doubt.

**Wonderbee31 –** I have yet to determine if the dream Hermione has will be prophetic, but I quite like the idea myself. I do not intend for this to drift into HaremFic territory, but on the other hand Pluto has already pointed out that there appears to be a lack of suitable males for high end magical unions. Maybe a single marriage with an open bedroom policy or something of that nature...

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** I think you guessed right. Too bad, Mr. Bloody Baron. Better luck next time.

**Queensarrow –** Thank you for saying so.

**Adam Durlock –** I considered the Crossover section, but didn't know where to put a triple when they are organized in doubles format. If anyone thinks I'm missing my real audience my miss-tagging the story, please say so.

**docfrodo –** Your response is just as appreciated.

**uo-chou – **Excellent! Brilliant! Can't wait for her to forget she's alive and walk right into a wall can you?

**Essex – **Ten points to your house.

**ChronoBlade –** It does take 'decoy' to a whole new level. Does the same thing for hot twin porn. Usagi and Harry could go around telling everyone that they are Luna's twin cousins Zoot and Dingo.


	9. Don't Panic

REVISED OCT 2010

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Chapter Nine: Don't Panic**

December 22nd, 1996

_**DETAILED PHYSICAL INTIMACY WARNING – SKIP DOWN TO NEXT MARKER IF NOT GROWN-UP**_

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**(The Author felt like writing something dirtier than usual, so be warned.)**

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'God,' Harry said in his head, 'I take it all back. It doesn't suck troll scrotum to be me anymore.'

Last night, Usagi delivered on a promise she made to her Senshi last summer when Usagi possessed Harry for a few minutes to talk to her girls. 'Naked' she said. 'In bed' too.

Check and check.

Harry was still in the bed that would serve as their private love nest for the next week or two. As incredible as it felt to fall asleep next to a thoroughly satisfied Usagi, he really didn't feel like leaving her side just to look for breakfast.

Besides, part of him was awake. No wonder he felt so pleasantly light headed; his second brain was hogging all of the available blood in his body. Better yet, someone else had noticed his second brain was awake and was doing something about it. Harry didn't feel like opening his eyes, but it would probably be a good idea to know who was giving his broomstick a tongue bath.

He moved his left hand until it met resistance and began to tickle his bedmate.

Light, airy giggles pushed past his shaft when he found a sensitive bit of what must be her ribcage. Those giggles upset several streamers of extremely long hair that criss crossed his body from as high as his chest to as low as his knees.

Harry smiled. That sounded like Usagi all right… unless he had gone back in time, changed into a girl and begun to suck his own… ewww. Just… ew. Maybe by focusing on Usagi's exceptional wake-up kiss, he could ignore the most vile possible use of a time turner ever.

Harry gently slid his hand up Usagi's back until he had the back of her head in his palm. He briefly considered the fact that some boys in Gryffindor talked about what their witches would and wouldn't do for their wizards and many of those witches clearly didn't want any guidance from their wizard when performing oral sex. On the other hand, Usagi began things last night by being very submissive and never once complained nor did she try to retake control. Feeling the odds were in his favor, Harry waited for Usagi's next head bob and gave her a little push.

"Hmmmmmmmm…." Usagi moaned theatrically and giggled around his hard shaft. Yes!

Harry was quickly becoming certain that signing a Betrothal Contract with Usagi was the smartest thing he had ever done or ever would do. While keeping his eyes closed, Harry relaxed and spent the next five minutes helping Usagi lick, suck and slurp her way to his creamy finale.

As delightfully fun as it all was, he couldn't resist her forever. His pulse raced and his breathing quickly became ragged. Having a firm grasp of the situation, Usagi knew what was about to happen and redoubled her efforts. As Harry finally began to seize up, Usagi surprised him one more time. Just as he was about to explode in her mouth, she stopped bobbing over the head of his cock and took him all the way in.

In that last moment of ecstasy before release, Harry opened his eyes.

"_Good morning, Harry." _Hotness? Harry looked up into the sparkling red eyes of Sesuna Meiou.

Harry wasn't the only one that heard the woman, either. Usagi flinched hard at hearing the voice of her trusted Senshi advisor. Setsuna must have been watching her suck Harry off.

Of course, having a girl flinch and shudder as he rubbed against the back of her throat only served to make Harry come harder. Harry reflexively pushed Usagi's head an extra centimeter or two further down his shaft further enhancing the already surreal orgasm. Too shocked to do anything else, Harry and Usagi rode through the pulsing climax that completely bypassed Usagi's taste buds and painted the back of her throat. Harry could only lie there and stare up at Hotness as she confidently met his gaze. Her face betrayed nothing, but her eyes… her eyes were laughing.

"_You're welcome, Harry."_

"Wha- errrrr… what are you doing here, Setsuna?" Harry somehow regained control of his lungs and managed to speak. "We were kind of in the middle of… something."

"_We_… _err… came over here to see if you two wanted breakfast." _Who the fu- oh, it was one of those talking cats.

For the first time that morning, Usagi choked on Harry's cock. Panicking, Usagi pulled off of Harry and looked around the room to see how many people had seen her live sex show. Harry broke eye contact with Hotness just long enough to look around the room too.

Thank Merlin. It was just Hotness and the one cat watching. Harry blew out the breath he didn't remember holding to begin with and pulled his frantic Love in to a warm hug. Usagi calmed in his arms… until she identified the cat.

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_**DETAILED PHYSICAL INTIMACY WARNING END – YOU CAN STOP PRETENDING TO SKIP HERE**_

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"_Luna! Ohmygodohmygodohmygod! Come give me a hug and a kiss!" _Usagi completely ignored her lack of clothes and reached for the feline Lunar adviser. She didn't care that this was her first morning back in Tokyo or that Luna just caught her in bed with Harry.

Luna quickly scooted out of range.

"_No kisses for you, young lady! I know exactly where that mouth's been recently." _Luna sniffed the air_. "And put something on. You're out in the open for anyone to see."_

"_Anyone who sneaks into occupied bedrooms, you mean. You should know better! What you saw was private… I'm not a porn star."_

Harry wisely held back on his honest opinion with respect for her potential as a porn actress… say something like that out loud and her auditions might stop.

Usagi scraped together what was left of her dignity. Speaking of shattered dignity and talking cats…

"_Wh__y aren't you biting my ankle or boxing my ears for being naughty with my boyfriend? You actually watched us doing it and you didn't even say anything!"_

Luna and Setsuna looked at each other before looking back to the two lovers. Setsuna was openly smirking now.

Harry and Usagi were scared.

"_Boyfriend? By goblin law, he is your husband." _Bloody- _"He has been since Harry kissed his time traveling bride at the Wizengamot trial last summer."_

WHAT?

While Usagi's dream of a super massive wedding was burning to the ground, Harry was stuck like a scratched record on the word married married married married mar-

"_You two are man and wife by goblin law as set forth in the Betrothal Contract." _Setsuna paused to savor their distress a bit more. _"To be fair, you are in a unique magical-international relationship that crosses many legal boundaries. This agreement has yet to be recognized by any non-magical government and British Ministry of Magic would insist you purchase a marriage license before publicly verifying the contract. I suppose your good friend Rufus might give you a pass, though. Agreements like yours also have a lot of weight with the oldest pureblood families and I wouldn't be surprised if some of them start calling Usagi 'Lady Potter' next time they see her."_

"_I… uh… I…" _Harry hadn't quite recovered yet. Inside, Setsuna was laughing so hard she was crying.

"_Married?" _It was Usagi's mix of equal parts hope and fear that caused Setsuna to finish her explanation.

"_By Lunarian law… the law set forth by Queen Sere__nity the First and the law I uphold to this very day… you are only engaged. The contract and how you two went about creating it is an acceptable start but you must have a proper wedding to be married in Silver Millennium tradition."_

"_Ohhhhh. We're still planning a wedding then… okay." _Usagi was clearly still dazed, but she was at least trying to pull out of it.

"_May I suggest we start with a private Shinto ceremony at the Hikawa Shrine followed by a more public Western ceremony with magical elements? Cover all of your bases, so to speak?"_

"_Sounds wonderful Hotn- Setsuna. Usagi deserves the biggest wedding we can give her, right?" _Harry looked over to his girlfriend/fiancée/wife and smiled. _"It's not every day that Sailor Moon gets married… the Crown Princess of the Moon should rate some spectacular pageantry, yeah?"_

Usagi went from being stunned to being intensely happy. Harry still wanted a wedding! A big one! Her crescent moon sigil began to glow.

"_We'll be downstairs in a few minutes, Hotness." _Usagi may have been talking to Setsuna, but she was looking at Harry. _"I want to lay with my husband one more time before we get ready for the day."_

"_As you command, my Princess." _Hotness winked at Usagi and grabbed a sputtering lunar advisor before slipping out of the bedroom.

"_Husband? You agree that we're married now?" _Harry asked this as Usagi straddled his waist and began to run her fingers over his chest.

"_You heard Hotness. We can pick and choose. Last night and this morning before they came into the room, I gave myself to my fiancé. But now? Now, I want my husband." _Usagi smirked wickedly as she felt proof of Harry's interest pulsing behind her. _"What do you want?"_

"_I want to fuck my wife."_

Harry's hands began to wander over Usagi's body. Usagi hummed in pleasure and started lining things up.

"_Awesome!"_

* * *

"It just… it feels weird. Ya know?" Ranma looked at the sign for a family run ramen shop across the street.

"I still can't get over it! I mean... sure, Harry and Setsuna both said that I could use magic in the open and not be worried about being punished for it or gawked at by the muggles, but it's like they don't even care." Hermione chimed in from right beside Ranma.

Ranma and Shampoo were both standing atop a chain link fence between the street and a new construction site. On one side of the fence, dirt and mud was pushed around in preparation for laying a new foundation. On the other side of the fence was a normal concrete and asphalt street with the odd partially frozen puddle of rainwater here and there. Hermione, being unable to balance on a fence, sat on her Nimbus and hovered just above the two martial artists.

There was a fairly constant stream of men, women and children going about their business, doing some Christmas shopping and otherwise trying to keep warm in the chilly December air.

"Huh? Oh… yeah." Ranma looked up to Hermione and then back to the ramen shop. "This is Nerima. Tokyo in general gets more than its fair share of demons, aliens and giant robots, but Nerima's always been a center for exotic fighting styles, spontaneous brawls and just plain freaky shit."

"Spontaneous? I'm impressed Ranma. Have you been studying Anything-Goes School of English Dictionary Combat?" Shampoo snickered from her perch and avoided an open palm strike that distorted the steel post under her. _"Temper, temper! Be a good boy or you sleep on the couch tonight."_

"_Just keepin' ya on yer toes, sweetheart." _Ranma reached over and tugged the steel back into near proper alignment. "See? I fixed it."

"Reparo." Hermione cast her spell before Shampoo could test the structural stability of the seemingly fixed post. "Should be as good as new, now. So. Where to next?"

"Well, looks like I won't be getting' any okonomyaki today. U-chan's isn't in business anymore. Damn. U-chan made the best..." Ranma looked towards the horizon as Shampoo looked on in sympathy.

The amazon was close to many of her sisters in the Joketsuzoku village, but Ranma had few friends. Now that the owner of U-chan's, a former contender for Ranma's heart, is out of his life, he's got one less than before. Shampoo thanked her ancestors for bringing these English kids into their lives. They made for good friends and provided opportunities to kill people. What more could Shampoo want?

"We better head back to the dojo. You've seen my old high school and the market. There's not really much more to see that we can't hit later."

Ranma slipped down to the pavement and began walking. Shampoo followed a minute later and Hermione dropped a few feet to remain just above the other two.

"Oh! Ranma?"

Hermione's questions stopped the martial artist before he got very far. By pure coincidence, a delivery truck chose that exact moment to pass by, its large wheels finding just about every puddle on the street. While both martial artists are fully capable of dodging arrows in a dead sleep, Jusenkyo was quite insistent that any of it's victims be unable to dodge a splashed puddle no matter how much warning they receive. After catching several liters of water in the chest, a redhead and her soaked-to-the-bone cat looked up to the still dry witch.

"Sorry! Really, I just wanted to stop by a bank and exchange some pounds but… do you need some hot water?"

Ranma rolled her eyes and picked up the loose bundle of clothes that Shampoo had been wearing before she turned.

"Thanks, but I can wait. Let's go find you a bank and then see if the sleeping beauties are awake yet."

"Meow." "Okay."

As witch, girl and cat headed back to their current lodgings, a shadowy figure began to follow them through morning traffic.

* * *

"_It's going to be okay, Love." _Harry put his arms around the nervous magical girl princess beside him.

They were almost ready for the day. Breakfast was over. Baths and showers were taken. Hair was dry.

"_But- but I've been gone so long! And… and they never knew if I was alive or dead and I never got to tell them and I don't know what Pluto told them and they don't know I'm back and… and… I'm __**scared.**__"_

"_Don't worry, Momma," _Cuteness chimed in from Usagi's lap, _"we practiced this last night, didn't' we?"_

Usagi nodded quickly and gave her daughter a tight hug.

Harry stood up and walked over to Hermione, who was chatting with Michiru, Setsuna and Ranma on the other side of the Outer Senshi's living room.

"You're going to be okay, right 'Mione?"

The brown haired witch in question turned Harry.

"Yes, thank you, Harry. They're going to show me more of Tokyo… I think we'll be doing some Christmas shopping... and I get to hang out with talking cats! Can you believe it?"

"Are you or are you not a witch? Of course I believe in talking cats. Why, with the way my life is going, I wouldn't be at all surprised this week to meet alien royalty that isn't from this solar system at all. I seem to bend the odds like that. I'll send a messenger patronus to you if something unexpected comes up."

"Take your time, Harry."

Hermione gave him a warm hug and a kiss on the cheek. Harry eagerly returned both before heading back to his Love and their little girl.

"Right. I need you to think of your home, Love. Think of the front step and your front door and everything around it in as much detail as you can remember."

Usagi grunted, closed her eyes and concentrated.

"_Now, just keep that picture in your mind…" _Harry pulled out his old holly and phoenix feather wand and slowly drew a memory out of Usagi's temple. _"Good work, Love."_

Harry brought the wispy glowing memory around from her temple to his and absorbed the memory.

"_Alright, group hug, everyone."_

Usagi and Cuteness both leapt into Harry's arms. For a minute, the family of three held still, basking in the warmth of a complete family unit. Keeping one hand in the hug, Harry pulled out his wand and cast notice-me-not's on all of them.

"_Alight. On three then…" _Both girls nodded into Harry's chest. _"One… two… three!"_

-pop-

Harry found himself in front of a nice looking home in the middle of a residential neighborhood. It wasn't any bigger or smaller than those around it, but there were different accents and styles on pretty much every house on the block in both directions. The front yard may have been small, but it seemed loved and well cared for. It didn't feel anything at all like Privet Drive.

He loved it already.

"Well?" Harry asked of his fiancée.

She just shook her head and held him closer than before. They were wearing enough layers to keep the cold at bay, but Harry suspected that Usagi was getting his jumper wet right about now. He could feel her frame beginning to shake. Harry looked at the other head buried in his winter cover.

"How about you, Cuteness? Will you ring the bell for us?"

Cuteness turned her face up to her Daddy and almost refused. New family cuddles were so wonderful that she didn't want to let go. Before last night, her last family cuddle was centuries ago. Still, her Daddy asked her to do something and she wasn't about to refuse him.

With a quick hop and jump across the two meters spanning Daddy and the doorbell ringer, she mashed the button a couple of times before jumping right back into her place in Cuddle Land.

For a second, no one moved. Then Harry heard a couple of muted voices on the other side of the door.

Just like the evening before, a few small clicks and bumps signaled that someone was opening the door. Harry felt Usagi flinch against him as the door finally opened.

_"Hey Mom! There's nobody here!" _A boy was standing just inside the house. His hair was a good bit darker than Usagi's, but there was a family resemblance of sorts. In demeanor, he reminded Harry of some of the Fourth Year students back in his Defense classes.

'Nobody here?' Oh, shit. The notice-me-not charms are still active. Harry's struggled under the panicked embrace of his fiancée for a moment before his hand managed to find the polished shaft of wood in his pocket.

"Finite." The charms fell.

The boy, who could only be Usagi's brother, turned back from yelling at his mother to close the door. That's when he saw them.

"_Crap!" _The boy jumped back so quickly Ranma would have been impressed.

"_Language, Shingo!" _That was the voice of a middle aged woman. Was that-

"_MOM!" _Usagi screeched at the door.

By the time Harry realized Usagi wasn't wrapped around his chest any longer, her long blonde streamers were hitting Shingo in the face as she sprinted by her younger brother.

"_Usag- USAGI! Oh, baby, you came back!"_

Soon the sound of two crying women filled the house.

"_She... she really came back?" _Usagi's brother, too stunned to follow Usagi back into the house, focused on the two people still waiting at the door.

"_She did at that." _Harry replied. "_But where are my manners? I believe that you have met my pink haired companion before... so allow me to introduce myself."_

Harry stood a bit taller and held his hand out for Shingo to shake. _"I'm Harry Potter. You're Shingo, right?"_

"_Uhh, yeah. Potter. Potter? Oh, man... when Sailor Pluto came by... she was for real?" _Shingo seemed to come out of his shock long enough for some pretty major shields of denial to fail. _"You mean that my idiot sister really is Sailor Moon? Really?"_

"_Really really."_

"_Oh man. Oh man! The guys at school are going to freak when they hear that!"_

Harry felt like dropping a good hint. _"They sure will. Hey, Shingo... where's your father right now?"_

"_He's at the office putting togeth- hey! Dad will wanna know Meatball Head's back!"_

Shingo ran deeper into the house without another thought for his guests.

"_D'you... d'you want to see my old room or maybe Momma's room, Daddy?" _It was the first thing Cuteness said since the apparation here. She was careful enough to say it so that Shingo would not hear.

"_Soon, honey. I think we should make ourselves available to Usagi and her mom just in case they want to cry __on us too."_

"_Okay."_

Cuteness stepped away from her daddy, but she held tight to his hand. Soon she was guiding him past the front door and into the house proper. As the two began removing their shoes, Cuteness spotted the mud trail from the boots Usagi borrowed from Hermione this morning. In fact, Usagi's entire outfit today was Gryffindor Bookworm Standard Revising Uniform Number Three/W. The 'W' denotes winter wear.

"_Idiot forgot to take off her shoes."_

"_Looks like you take after your uncle." _Harry snickered. The mahou shoujo witch in training scowled while unlacing her trainers. _"Don't worry. In case you haven't noticed... I'm a wizard."_

Harry proved his point by taking off his shoes with one hand while casting floor cleaning charms with the other.

From a room or two over, Harry and Cuteness heard Shingo call out. _"Hey Dad! Get home quick! Wha- I don't care if you're on a deadline! Meatball Head came back. Yeah. Usagi. Yeah, my sister – your little princess – is home __**right now**__! __**Now! **__And you know what else? She brought that Potter guy with her. Yeah, him. 'Kay. Bye."_

Shingo came back around the corner.

"_So I figure you got about thirty-five minutes... maybe forty with bad traffic before Dad gets home. I hope you can prove you didn't kidnap Meatball Head when__ he gets here or you won't be alive long enough to celebrate Christmas."_Shingo was smiling.

Harry matched the boys smile with one of his own.

"_Kidnap Sailor Moon? I'm a light wizard, not a dark one. Besides, you have no idea how powerful she is. I wouldn't stand a chance against her unless I cheated horribly." _Harry turned to his daughter. _"Come on, Cuteness, it's time to meet the mother-in-law."_

Shingo still didn't know what to make of the foreign guy who brought his sister home, but he must be brave to head into the kitchen with those two girlie-girls sobbing on each other.

* * *

Pain was his life.

Or was it his death? Severus Snape didn't know anymore. He didn't care either. He'd always assumed that his personal hell would be staffed by Gryffindors, Potters and a righteously angry Lily. Certainly not Death Eaters and his former master Tom Riddle. Not that it mattered when time had no meaning and the only constant in his life was torment.

Someone was waking him up again. Damn them to hell.

"Crucio!" Ah, the Dark Lord himself.

Snape felt the pain wash over his nervous system and wake him up faster than any pepper up potion ever could.

"So glad you could join us, dear Severus. Oh, but you don't look so well, do you?" Snape's hearing wasn't what it used to be, but with the Dark Lord's lips only a centimeter or two away from his ear he heard well enough. "Let me help you up. Imperio."

At his magical prime, Severus would have been able to escape Voldemort's Imperius Curse even if it was by the slimmest of margins, but he was not in his prime. No, he was rather far from it. That's why Severus Snape jumped out of bed and walked confidently over to a table which seemed to dominate the room. As soon as the former Hogwarts Potions Master sat in an available chair, sticking charms activated and held him firmly in place.

Just for fun, Voldemort had the Imperiused Snape to try really hard to escape his sticking charms. The one arm that wasn't broken yet finally succumbed to fate and snapped in two different places. Without warning, the mind control curse fell and with it the soft pleasant feeling generally attributed to being held under.

Even more pain flooded Snape's senses. Walking on a broken leg when your back was also broken was generally considered a bad idea. Snape lost control of his own body, greasy hair hitting the tabletop one heartbeat before his nose did. Snape lost his ability to scream some time ago, but he could moan with the best of them now.

Feeling sufficiently amused for the moment, Voldemort sat at one end of the table and composed himself.

"Really, Severus. I'm ashamed of you. There's a pureblood Lady at the table and you haven't even given her the respect she's due."

Severus picked his head up off of the table with great difficulty and saw the woman in question. Narcissa Malfoy.

"G- _-hack-_" Snape nearly choked on his own tongue due to various injuries, but he knew that staying silent would only be worse. "Good day, Lady Malfoy. It _-cough- _it is good to see you well."

And she did look well from where he was. Her silky blonde hair was in a tight braid, not one strand out of place. Her skin glowed with health... her posture was flawless and her attire was fit for any ball.

"She does look well, doesn't she." Voldemort laughed to himself for a moment. "We'll see how that goes won't we? Yes... but that depends on you, Severus. Her well being now depends entirely on you."

Voldemort grabbed the former spy by the scalp and turned Snape's eyes to meet his own.

"You see Severus... I find myself quite disappointed in the Malfoy family and it's not just a recent problem. Lucius and his son have been given every opportunity to serve me and they have failed at nearly every endeavor since my rebirth. Pitiful, really. The only silver lining to this cloud is the vaults under Malfoy control and the political clout of the Houses Black and Malfoy. Now that Draco has failed in a most spectacular fashion it falls upon our dear Lady Malfoy to bring two pureblood names back into glory from their current shame."

Snape found his head twisted back around to look at the woman who had once been a fair friend of his many years ago.

"Obviously the gold is mine when whenever I snap my fingers... but the idea that I could marry her and legitimately claim two more Lordships aside from my status as the Heir of Slytherin is very appealing, wouldn't you agree, Severus? Can you imagine what it would be like for me to openly walk into a Wizengamot meeting and lay claim to my voting privileges?"

Rather than wait for a response, Voldemort took Snape's head in hand again and made the broken man nod yes several times. Severus cursed his weakness. He didn't even have the strength to flinch much less the strength to hide a flinch so the Dark Lord wouldn't see it. Would his former master actually consider marriage when he'd never spoken of it before?

"I'm glad you agree. But you see, dear friend, the satisfaction I could get from doing that would last only until I start killing off anyone who refuses to vote 'yes' on my proposed law to make me the undisputed master of all of England. You see? It's only going to be fun the first time. And that, my dear Severus... that is why I came to see you."

Severus was actually disappointed that Voldemort would likely stop talking soon. When Voldemort talks, he's not actively tormenting his victims. Well, not as much.

"I will give you two options. One: There is a parchment before you. Sign it willingly and Narcissa will become the heir to your full estate. I grant you, it's not much, but you do have a few rather nasty tomes on dark potions. If you sign the parchment, then I promise you a quick and easy death by the Killing Curse. You won't even have to wait long for it. Two: You will pick up your wand and kill Narcissa. She has already willed all of her worldly possessions to persons and businesses which front for my servants so I won't be out anything except for the pureblood titles. If you kill her, then I promise I will release you. That's right, I said release. You can go to St. Mungo's or to Hogwarts or where ever your treacherous mind takes you. I'll even give you a whole year before actively hunting you down again. Doesn't that sound nice?

It did actually... sound nice, that is. Severus considered his options with what mental facilities he still retained after Merlin only knew how much torture he had endured here, wherever here was. Before the Moon Princess used her white magics to scour the dark in Severus's soul, he would have immediately chosen to kill Narcissa. Better to take the admittedly weak promise of freedom and possibly fight another day. To be more accurate, he wouldn't even be in this predicament if the 'Senshi' hadn't magically reformed him. But he was reformed. He couldn't kill Narcissa now. He was too damn light for his own good. Look! Even in his own mind he was making shockingly Gryffindor decisions that would cause his death. Pathetic. Sadly, it was also unavoidable.

Severus marshaled all of his reserves and picked up the waiting quill. It took several attempts, but he finally did manage to get his signature on the document in question. And now his death awaits... assuming the Dark Lord hadn't just lied outright.

"It would seem that the Headmaster or one of his lapdogs finally made a lion out of a snake..."

Voldemort chuckled for a moment, then he began to laugh. It was a deep, booming laugh; the kind of laugh that should only be heard from a Dark Lord after he utters the phrase 'and _soon _the world will be **mine**!'. Severus was beginning to think he was the victim of a Weasley level prank. After another minute of the Dark Lord's personal amusement, Voldemort rose from his chair and spoke again.

"Did you see that, Narcissa dear? Do you understand what it is he has done?" Voldemort switched from addressing the Lady to the spy. "I don't think you understand what you did Severus, but you will learn before you die. You see, she is currently under my Imperious control at the moment."

"Narcissa! I command you to tell your old family friend exactly what it is he's done! No lies and speak as though I'm not in the room. When you have had your say, pick up your wand and use it on him. You may repay Severus as you see fit for two minutes before you end his life with the Avada Kedavra. Do it now!"

Narcissa snapped to attention and leveled the worst, most hateful glare Severus had ever seen right at him. What is going on?

"You think you've suffered enough have you? You dare take the easy way out? Or maybe you think you're doing me some small favor... well you most certainly are not!"

Narcissa was in rare form as she stormed around the table to his side. She grabbed Snape's head not unlike Voldemort did just minutes ago and pulled her eyes even with his. There was also the glowing tip of a wand digging at the side of his Adam's apple.

"You don't know what suffering is! And now that Draco has followed his father to an ignoble fate I have no hope and the bleakest of prospects. You just sit there and scream until you fall unconscious but me... me... I have to figure out how to appease him and pay the penance of my family's mistakes lest I get torn apart by our Lord or any number of his followers. As you well know, his moods are mercurial so my task is often impossible.

"Now with my Draco, the last male heir of the Blacks and Malfoys, missing the Dark Lord has decreed that I am to marry him. I knew before I was nine that I would likely end up the trophy wife of a Lord... I even learned to look forward to that life. But this is different. He is no pureblood lord. He's barely human. He can't possibly want children, can he? What kind of hellspawn could I possibly bear for him? I wanted you to kill me, Severus. I wanted out of this life, but you ruined everything. All you had do was cast one curse and we'd both be free of this nightmare. Instead all I get is two minutes of revenge and your death before my living hell is made manifest. I suppose I'd better make them count."

Narcissa Malfoy held the Cruciatus Curse on Severus Snape unbroken for a minute and fifty nine seconds. As fired up as she was, Severus's first and only thought before succumbing to the pain was that her curse actually hurt worse than Voldemort's. Must be the whole woman scorned thing.

"Avada Kedavra!"

At long last, Severus Snape found peace.

Voldemort began to clap for Narcissa's inspired performance.

"Bravo, my dear! That's the kind of spirit that got me interested in Bellatrix so many years ago."

The snake faced man stepped away from the table and put several meters between himself and the heavily panting woman. He drew his wand.

"Now, I'm going to release the Imperious Curse, Narcissa. I'm going to drop the curse and you are going to to attack me with everything you are. You know why? Because, I like a woman with spirit. They're so much more entertaining to break."

Voldemort released his hold on Narcissa's mind. Knowing that her only salvation lay in impressing him in some way, Narcissa drew on the hate her position has generated for the man standing opposite her. With an inarticulate shout of rage, Narcissa turned on her opponent and cast Fiendfyre.

Voldemort knew he had picked the right witch in Narcissa. Such passion!

* * *

Hermione looked at the cityscape around her. Glass, steel and concrete as far as the eye could see. To a progressive person, it was really quite beautiful as this city perfectly represented the kind of power that non-magical people could wield to great effect.

The teenaged witch jerked hard on her Nimbus Two-thousand's upper shaft and brought it into a steep dive.

Why would Hermione Granger be executing near Potter level acrobatics? Especially without Harry himself being nearby to witness her actions and be impressed?

Because if she didn't, the bleeding falling girl she was trying to hit with featherlight and cushioning charms was going to make a lovely stain on the street three stories down.

Behind the witch and falling girl, a deafening roar shattered office tower window panes for blocks in every direction. If Hermione wasn't too busy saving a young woman's life right now, she might wonder why a local heavy industrial company was foolish enough to both retrieve a sleeping demon from wherever the hell it came from and -huff- try to wake the bloody thing up! The beast in question was at least six stories tall and made of what looked like molten rock.

The fusillade of planetary and spiritual attacks responsible for making the hellish beast roar in pain also doubled the local ambient light levels for a few vital seconds. Even falling into the shadow of one of Tokyo's many skyscrapers, the falling girl was clearly visible to Hermione in the magical glow. Hermione cast as quickly yet accurately as she could from the seat of a flying broom. Considering the D.A. had been practicing broom-vs-broom spellfire fairly often over the fall, Hermione's performance was nothing short of exemplary.

As Hermione controlled the last few meters of the girl's descent, she noticed the outfit her subject was wearing. It wasn't devil hunter Yohko from Hermione's summer research, but the red shirt with white trim and a yin-yang meant this girl may have been in the same line of business. Someone called out from behind.

"Nice catch, Hermione." Shampoo came even with the witch.

"Thank you, Shampoo." Now that the devil hunter was safely on the ground, Hermione turned to her purple haired companion. "Shouldn't we be asking Harry and Usagi to help with this?"

"You want to take Usagi away from her mother _now_? They probably crying on each other as we speak! Harry is meeting his future mother-in-law... he probably feel safer fighting too too big demon." Fighting a demon was really turning Shampoo on. Her excitement was showing in the grin on her face and the pidgin English that she sometimes fell into. "Besides, demon is losing!"

And it was. As a team of paramedics swarmed the moaning heroine at their feet, Hermoine saw the weakening demon fall to its knees under a second, larger magical artillery barrage.

"_Ohhhh... what happened?" _The girl getting medical attention behind them moaned.

"_You got your ass handed to you, Kanzaki! Either tell Yohko to step up your training or go home. You let a delivery truck sized fist find a hole in your guard, idiot." _Shampoo stopped berating the embarrassed, bleeding girl and looked back to Hermione. "This happen pretty often around here. Senshi not always need to interfere either. I think Venus was angry that the demon smashed up a music store and she wanted some revenge."

Hermione nodded to the amazon and nudged her Nimbus back into the air. The combined force of Senshi, martial artists and devil hunters may be on the verge of victory, but that didn't mean that the demon was helpless. Hermione returned to her self-appointed post as air rescue. Besides, reporters were swarming like rabid dogs and she didn't want to be caught on the ground if any of them breached the police barricades.

On the other side of a line of local police and firefighters, Nabiki Tendo lowered her directional microphone and smiled. Santa Claus was coming to town, alright, and Nabiki was planning to score big this year.

* * *

"_Well sir... it's rather compli__cated."_

Harry and Usagi were sitting side by side on one side of the Tsukino family dinner table. While Cuteness was offered a seat of her own, she refused to get out of Harry's lap. Shingo sat opposite them and alternated his confused, excited and/or disbelieving stares between his sister and her... boyfriend? Usagi's mother Ikuko sat at one end of the table where she could keep a firm grasp on her daughter's hand. Kenji Tsukino sat opposite his wife and kept his eyes on the young man sitting next to his daughter. Lunch started to cool off in its serving trays as no one seemed interested in eating quite yet.

"_Life is complicated, Mister Potter. I just want to know what you are to my niece and my daughter."_

Harry turned to Usagi looking for guidance.

"_They're my parents, Harry. Pluto already told them more than I thought she would. I don't want anymore secrets in my home." _Harry thought over Usagi's words and had to agree. If these were his parents, then he would want them to know the truth. In a manner of speaking they were his parents, weren't they?

"_To begin with... in the eyes of the non-magical governments of England and Japan I hardly exist and your daughter is still dead. That's all likely to change soon, but it's a place to start. In Magical England w__here the Betrothal Contract Pluto showed you came from, Usagi and I are already man and wife."_

Ikuko gasped, though neither of the Tsukino males showed any overt reaction to Harry's words. He continued.

"_By the laws of the Silver Millennium, which is the a__ncient civilization that the Senshi all originate from, we are engaged but not yet married. As Usagi is the Crown Princess of the Moon, she and I both hold Silver Millennium law and customs to be more important than anything else."_

"_And my niece? You obvio__usly know her yet I can't figure out how that's possible."_Harry could tell that Kenji was not as accepting as his wife seemed to be.

How to explain? Pluto was conveniently absent and time travel was hard to prove. Harry had to trust that Usagi's 'no secrets' policy was the right thing to do. It sure as hell wasn't going to be the easiest.

"_Your niece isn't actually your niece."_

"_Yes she is." _Kenji was looking for some weakness in their story and Harry could see in his change of demeanor that the older man thought he had found his target.

"_Oh, really? Who's her mother then?"_

Silence.

"_Her father? When's her birthday? If she is your niece then can you tell me what time of day she was born at? Which hospital was she born in? Is she blood related to you or to your wife?" _Harry wanted to do this soft and easy, but he didn't see any way how.

"_It... it doesn't matter. She __**is **__my niece. Ikuko?"_

Usagi's mother couldn't respond. She had a hand over her mouth... she was silently shaking from the effort of trying to come up with the answers to Harry's questions and failing.

Harry dropped his mouth down to Cuteness's ear level and asked a question.

"_Did you charm them, honey?" _Harry felt Cuteness nod. _"Can you break the charm for me?" _Another nod.

"_Luna-P! It's time to put them back the way they were." _Cuteness's call was heeded by a cat head shaped ball which popped out from under the table and began floating in place in front of her.

The ball certainly caught the Tsukinos' attention. Before any of them could comment on a floating cat-ball, Luna-P released a flash of light from its irises. Mother, father and son all caught Luna-P's magical discharge right between the eyes.

"_I'm terribly sorry, Mom. I didn't mean for you to be tricked for so long but she kinda claimed you before I could do anything about it. Cuteness is a magical girl like me, but she's from the future. Magical or not, she needed a family to take care of her and who better than relatives? She's not your niece... she's my daughter." _Usagi stretched her free hand out to touch Cuteness. _"She's your granddaughter, Mom."_

Shingo somehow found his voice. _"What next? Will your evil twin appear and destroy us?"_

Is that boy a Seer or what?

Harry saw an opening in the boy's statement and dipped his fingers into an ice water sitting near his empty rice bowl.

"_Would you believe our story if she did?" _Harry Potter alias Heather Snape alias Evil Twin asked.

Usagi's mother fainted; her daughter's evil twin appeared and destroyed her.

Harry turned to Usagi and stage whispered, _"This is going better than I thought it would."_

"_Evil Twin, huh? You should keep that one. Sounds better than 'Other' Sailor Moon doesn't it?" _Usagi was tired of crying and wanted a reason to laugh.

Cuteness agreed. _"Does this mean I have two mommies now? 'Cause I know a girl who has two mommies and she says that it's okay for a girl to love another girl."_

* * *

The train ride from Azabu-Juuban to Nerima was full of novel experiences for three non-magical people who happened to be the birth family of Sailor Moon.

In order to keep a low profile, Harry charmed her hair and that of Usagi's to closely match Ikuko's darker curly locks. She then did a double eye color switch to match with Kenji. It would look to all the world like a family with twins who were neither Usagi Tsukino nor Heather Snape. After the magic makeover was complete, Harry caught Ikuko looking covetously at her wand.

More than once, the family got to watch Harry handle some more unsavory passengers by discreetly hexing them. One young man who was harassing a group of pretty secretaries experienced the indignity of the Bat-Bogey Hex. Ikuko was quick to praise Harry for her defense of the young women and – even better – the display of stealth and distraction spells which kept anyone else on the train from catching her in the act.

After two wrong turns just outside of the Nerima commuter train terminal, Usagi bit the bullet and called Pluto over her Senshi communicator. There's a big difference between apparating somewhere and taking the train.

"_Welcome back, Harry. Usagi." _Hermione met the Tsukino's and their magical escort at the Tendo compound gate and gave both her best friend and next best friend big hugs. Shingo wanted a hug from the cute foreign girl, but kept silent.

"_Hermione! How did you pick up Japanese?" _Harry was pleasantly surprised. He knew from personal experience that relying on a translator when a room full of teenage girls are gossiping at full speed is a very aggravating situation to be in.

"_Ami remembered where that magical shop yo__u found was and showed me in!" Hermione raised a delicate hand and pulled her curls away from one ear. Hermione's ear lobe was sporting a new jade hoop. "These earrings can't translate just any language like your ring can, but they do work for most Pacific__ Rim dialects. For example, I just had a discussion with Shampoo in both Mandarin and Cantonese but I couldn't follow her when she reverted to her native village's dialect. Too far inland or too specialized, I suppose."_

After polite introductions, Hermione showed them in.

Usagi's parents were surprised, and her brother was more than a little turned on, to find that they were going to have dinner with all of those girls Usagi snuck off to do 'things' with over the last several years. They also saw Mamoru, the young man that Kenji and Ikuko had more than one argument over considering that he was clearly several years older than Usagi when he was dating her. Now that the sharply dressed Mamoru was an ex-boyfriend, Kenji found that he could relax a bit rather than constantly watch the college boy for inappropriate touching.

He had an English wizard to watch over for that, now.

Ikuko found her way into the kitchen and began helping Makoto, Ranma and Shampoo with dinner preparations. Kenji found himself discussing journalism and its role in society with Setsuna who had been introduced to him as their hostess for the evening. Shingo was a little too amped by being surrounded by hot girls to make the Senshi connection yet. After trying hard not to stare at Ami's bottom too much, he accepted a challenge from Haruka, Cuteness and Hotaru to play the new Sailor Moon game for Famicom. Shingo started making mistakes and losing lives as soon as he realized that he was playing a character modeled after his own sister. Things got weird when Minako came up behind the boy and started giving a running commentary on just what the game designers got wrong about Moon, the other playable Senshi and the monsters they were fighting.

Half an hour later, dinner was served in the dojo as the Tendo house's dining room simply wasn't large enough for a full Senshi meeting with extra guests.

Shampoo and Ranma gave a show of martial place setting by throwing the soups and other cooked dishes between each other. Most of the girls applauded the seeming ease with which Ranma could kick or slap platters and bowls into the right position on their table without spilling one drop.

Over the next hour or so, everyone seemed to relax over a mix of traditional Chinese and Japanese dishes. Conversations were kept light except for those few instances where Usagi and Harry told partial, sanitized versions of her death and resurrection to her parents and brother. Ikuko cried anyway.

In an effort to lighten the mood, Harry and Hermione gave a few small charms and transfiguration displays. Miso soup made for a charming hedgehog, though fewer people asked for refills once they thought about how the soup just had its own intestines and a butt. The whole dinner party went silent once when Hermione transfigured several pairs of chopsticks into snakes and Harry talked to them. In parseltongue. Harry told the chopsnakes to return to their original place settings before Hermione canceled the transfigurations.

Finally, after a serving of green tea ice cream and fried sugar cakes, Setsuna stood up.

"_If I may have your attention, please." _Everyone else at the table stopped their chatting and looked to the green haired woman. Hotness had that effect on people without even trying.

"_I would like once again, in the presence of her family to welcome Usagi Tsukino back to life (clapping began all along the table) and to thank Harry Potter as the one who resurrected her (the sound of clapping rapidly doubled)."_

A deeply blushing Usagi went with her heart and gave a deep loving kiss to her savior. She and Harry were far too wrapped up in the moment to remember that Kenji and Ikuko were sitting in the next seats over.

Ikuko saw the way her daughter looked into Harry's eyes before the kiss and had an epiphany. The girl never looked at Mamoru Chiba that way... or at least she never did where her mother could see. Her daughter was serious when she whispered to Ikuko that in her heart, she and Harry were already married. She was very glad her husband didn't hear that particular admission.

Kenji may not have seen his daughter's eyes before the kiss, but he could read body language well enough. This dinner was reminding him more and more of a wedding reception than anything else.

Shingo tried to ignore his sister's face sucking performance and began to scan the table for any girls that looked loose enough to give him a little sugar tonight. With a preexisting crush on one Ami Mizuno, his scan of the table wasn't as thorough or as accurate as it could have been. In short, he was just as clueless about girls as Harry was at the time of the Yule Ball.

Cuteness was in heaven. Momma was alive. Daddy was alive. They were both alive and in love and kissing just like she remembered them doing every day for centuries. Was the fairy tale over yet? Could she have her happily ever after now? Please?

Setsuna waited for the clapping to settle down before continuing. _"I would like to apologize to the Tsukinos now... for inviting you to dinner without explaining why and also for delaying your family reunion by twelve hours. We had Usagi back last night but were too focused on our own reunions to share the good news."_

Setsuna bowed to the Tsukinos prompting several of the other girls to quietly apologize and bow from their positions at the table. Harry nodded in a half-hearted manner; he was quite happy with how last night went and wasn't about to feel the least bit guilty.

"_Now for the explanation." _With but a thought, Setsuna willed away her everyday business suit and skirt outfit and replaced it with the uniform of her station. Sailor Pluto stood before the audience. _"As I told the three of you some months ago, your daughter Usagi is not only Sailor Moon but also our princess. She is Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon and she has returned from the dead to do something very important to the future of our world."_

If there had been any doubts left in Kenji's, Ikuko's or Shingo's minds about who it was they were dining with tonight, it was gone now. Shingo shifted a bit in his chair to deal with his growing problem. Senshi. He was surrounded by Senshi. Hot, gorgeous, sexy Senshi.

Ikuko was still having trouble with just how important her daughter is, Sailor Moon or no. _"Wh- what could my daughter have to do that is so important?"_

Pluto smiled. _"She has to plan her wedding, of course."_

With Pluto's statement, Usagi shot out of her chair, raised her hands high showing twin V's for victory and screeched, _"I'mmmm gettinnnnnnng MARRRRIIIIIEEEEEEED!"_

After another few minutes of congratulations with the standard laughing/crying/sobbing that any screeched marriage declaration requires, Pluto retook center stage once more.

"_If I may, Your Highness?" _Usagi nodded at her adviser. _"This wedding is going to be one for the history books. Our Crown Princess is joining herself to an Ancient and Noble House of English magical tradition. This wedding is not only strong in love and magic but in political power as well. And let's not forget that there has not been a Royal Lunarian wedding in well over twelve thousand years."_

Her daughter was going to be the key figure in the most important wedding ceremony in recorded history. Ikuko nearly fainted.

"_I once told Lord Potter that over this Christmas break, we would conspire to reveal the existence of the Wizarding World to the non-magical world. Tonight, we begin. As important as our Princess is to us and to Japan, that is how important Lord Potter is to Magical Europe. Now, while Japan knows that the Senshi exist as more than mere urban myth, the same cannot be said for Europe's knowledge of wizardry and witchcraft.__However we cannot tell Japan that Sailor Moon is getting married and then refuse to say who she's getting __married to." _Pluto looked over to Harry. _"Harry, if you would please explain what exactly we are conspiring against?"_

Harry didn't know beforehand that Sailor Hotness was going to call him out in front of everyone -cough- in-laws -cough- but he understood what she wanted and even why it would be better for him to do it rather than Hotness or Hermione. Harry stood up.

As Harry looked up and down the table of magical girls, friends and family, he thought of a wonderful way to put nervous hands to use. He started massaging Usagi's shoulders.

"_Hello again, everyone." _Several giggles and 'hi, Harry's met his greeting. _"As Pluto just pointed out, Japan is pretty knowledgeable and supportive of its magical population... the good ones like you anyway... which is a big difference from a large majority of the planet. There is a world, not just one or two small communities but an entire world of wizards and witches and dragons and other magical beings, places and such that those in charge of the Wizarding World have chosen to hide from the rest of you. Magical history books tell us that this great divide was created due to increased demands by non-magical people to have magic used for their benefit as well as increased religious persecution. The International Confederation of Wizards voted centuries ago to enforce worldwide secrecy laws designed to hide wizards and witches from everyone else._

"_Whatever good these statutes of secrecy may have done in the past, I believe they have outlived their usefulness. Wizards know that they can help the non-magical world and t__hey refuse to do it. What the old wizards in power don't understand is that their own laws are working against them. They're stuck two hundred years in the past technology wise... they don't understand how airplanes work and they don't even realize men hav__e walked on the Moon already."_

_Harry looked down to his massage therapy client. "I mean recently, Love. Not millennia ago."_

Giggles broke out among the assembled Senshi. Usagi just continued to purr under Harry's handwork.

"_These laws don't matter to dark __wizards who are going to break the law anyway... Voldemort and his Death Eaters make a sport out of torturing and killing normal British citizens. The only thing the Ministry of Magic is willing to do about it is hide the problem. They change the memories __of everyday people and make them think that their husbands, wives and children died in tragic accidents. They don't investigate the crimes- they cover them up._

"_When I spent part of my summer here and used my curse to hide in plain sight as Heather Snape, __I helped save normal people one at a time and it felt brilliant. Even better, I signed one of those contracts like the rest of you girls did and now a lot of money is going to be used to help local victims get back on their feet and learn to live with thei__r loss. Fighting monsters out in the open also helps those who have suffered from attacks see that they are in fact being protected. Can you imagine if that demon you ladies... and Ranma, sorry... if that demon you went after this morning found itself in t__he middle of London? Not one wizard would lift his finger to do anything unless it somehow stumbled onto Diagon Alley. More than likely, they'd wait for the army or whatever to come in and blast it to hell before sneaking in and charming everyone's memorie__s to think it was some mundane thing like a tornado. Hell, even if they found a dark aligned wizard had opened some kind of gate and let the beast into our world, a few bribes later and the wizard wouldn't even have to serve time in prison."_

Harry paused in his speech. _"Hermione? Hermione, is there anything I've said that you take issue with?"_

The brown haired witch suddenly found all eyes on her.

"_Um, well." _Hermione shook off her hesitation and replied_. "I can't say that there is. There are a lot of wonderful things to be found in the Wizarding World but there's also a lot more corruption and darkness than you've mentioned so far. Wizards don't want muggles to have any control over their lives but they take great delight in controlling and subjugating other magical races… races like the house elves, goblins, werewolves and Veela. I could write a book about the social failures inherent in magical society. Why, I could write a whole series of books on the subject."_

"_And I'd be the first to buy every one. Have you considered nailing essays to a church door? I hear that's a rather good way to start social reform." _Harry countered warmly.

Hermione was only just beginning to realize that for all of the grief Harry and the others gave her for S.P.E.W., the elf rights club, Harry was showing a passion for social activism rivaling her own. Hermione wondered not for the first time if Usagi would let her borrow Harry for a bit of baby-making sometime in the future. Maybe if she asked really nicely.

"_I'll think about it." _And she would. _"Of course it wouldn't be fair to recount the ills of magical society without admitting that many non-magicals still hold a very negative opinion of magic. Harry's aunt and uncle and my parents all belong to the group who dislike magic and see it as unnatural."_

Harry may not have been expecting Hermione to pull the Aunt Petunia card but he was shocked past caring to hear she had a similar problem. He cringed knowing what pains he took to hide his home life and knowing just how much better Hermione was at certain things.

"_At first, my mother and father were surprised, even pleasantly so, to learn I had hidden talents. Then as I started my magical education, they felt the downside of modern magical society. Going to a magical school meant that my non-magical schooling was over and that I would not become the great scholar they expected me to be. For two highly educated and successful people who mingle with other highly educated, successful people, I suddenly became a topic of great scandal and shame. All they could say was that I now attend an elite boarding school, but they could not say which one or what I'm studying. Others began to suspect that I had been knocked up early and shipped off to a nunnery or some such nonsense but there was little my parents could do to set them straight. As it is, my parents now try very hard to pretend I was never born and have shifted all of their hopes and dreams to my younger sister. Luckily for them, Juliet did not receive a Hogwarts letter on her eleventh birthday and is well on her way to a promising future of elite schooling and a high profile career."_

Hermione opened her mouth to continue explaining the troubles they would face, but found that she couldn't talk anymore. She looked down into her dinner plate, red faced. She didn't mean to say so much but once she started, she just couldn't stop. A pair of hands came down on her shoulders. When Hermione looked up to thank Harry for his support, she was surprised to find a teary Usagi had beat him to it.

"_I often wondered,"_ Usagi said with a wavering voice, _"if it is harder to hide your nature to protect those you love or if it is harder to hide your nature from those you love. I always knew that my parents would accept me if I ever had the courage or the need to admit to what I was. It is terribly unfair that my family has accepted me for what I am but yours has not."_

The Moon Princess wrapped Hermione in a tight hug.

"_Know that we are family, Hermione. You are in my heart as surely as you are in Harry's. I promise you... I promise one day your mom and dad will see what a mistake it was to cast you aside." _

The room was silent out of respect for two young women and their pain. Harry took a few deep breaths before getting out of his seat and moving to embrace both crying girls together. Soon there was a little pink haired girl hanging onto the group from one side.

Harry picked up the torch, so to speak.

"_This is why we are conspiring against the status quo. By marrying Usagi in a very public ceremony here in Japan…" _-Usagi and Ikuko both smiled when hearing that Harry wouldn't ask for the wedding to be in England- _"We will also be showing the world at large that there is a hidden magical world they don't know about. We will remove the fear and hatred that separates both worlds from each other so that this need never happen again."_

"_While I agree completely with what you are trying to achieve," _Mamoru Chiba interrupted, "_someone has to play devil's advocate here. How do we make sure that the magical and non-magical worlds don't react poorly to the news? How do we ensure that something like the Inquisition or a full scale war doesn't destroy everything?"_

"_Our Princess has overcome horrible odds before, Mamoru. While we are not dealing with youma or aliens thi__s time, we now have allies and resources that were previously unavailable. We have new allies in Ranma and Shampoo… we are on friendly terms with the Chinese Amazons and their neighbors the Phoenix Tribe. Harry is powerful and influential on his own yet he__ also has the love and loyalty of many good people. The next time we meet there will be twice as many people in the room and the real planning can begin. Tonight, we deal with the biggest issues. For example… the wedding day. When is it? … Usagi?"_

Everyone turned from watching Pluto deliver her speech to gaze at the blonde Crown Princess.

_"Hmmmm?"_

"_Usagi dear." _Ikuko tried to put a little heat into her words to break up her daughter's rather embarrassing display. _"Miss Pluto asked a question. Have you picked a date for the wedding yet?"_

"_Oh... That's easy. July thirty-first." _Harry and Hermione both smiled, even if Hermione had to push a few tears out of the way to do it.

"_Why then dear?" _Ikuko reacted first but she wasn't the only one surprised at Usagi's immediate answer.

"_It's my Harry's birthday, of course." _Usagi pulled back from holding Hermione and leaned deeper into Harry. _"I want chocolate. Do we have any chocolate?"_

"_Sorry, honey. Didn't bring any." _Makoto pouted to herself. She'd remember to bring chocolate next time. Chocolate and cookies... fresh baked cookies of course.

Usagi pouted more than Makoto. _"I've been alive again for twenty-four whole hours now and I haven't had any chocolate yet. This is an outrage! Harry. We're going out to get chocolate."_

"_Yes, my Princess." _Harry replied. _"I'll do you one better. Heather Snape and Sailor Moon should go on a broom ride and chocolate run. What do you think?"_

"_Heather Snape's going out tonight? Awesome! Can I come? Please? Huh? It's been waaaay to long since I beat some thug's face in!" _Minako was bouncing in place she was so eager.

"_I don't see why not... need another broom though... 'Mione? You up for a little after dinner snack run and vigilantism? I'll help you master the Flying Shit Monkey Hex." _Harry began to think that this could turn out to be a really fun evening.

"_Buuuut I wannna gooooo toooooo!" _Cuteness was being a grumpy-grump. It was getting close to her bed time.

"_I'll get you chocolate!" _Ikuko had a big grin on her face. _"You come with me tonight and we'll stay up late and watch movies and eat popcorn and have a sleepover!"_

Kenji tried to hide his surprise. Sure Usagi was technically old enough to conceive, but neither of them had expected her to do it any time soon. Why was Ikuko going full bore grandmother already?

"_Will we see you for breakfast, Bunny?" _Ikuko wasn't even looking at her daughter. At the moment she only had eyes for her grandbaby.

"_Yes, Mom." _Usagi, Harry and Minako were all getting up to 'change'. _"Hey! Do you... uh, do you wanna watch?"_

"_Really?" _Ikuko perked up even more. Today she got her daughter back after a year of missing persons reports. She even got a sweet little time traveling granddaughter out of the deal. And now her daughter is going to share part of her 'secret life' with her. So happy! _"I'd love to see what it is you girls do to get changed."_

As Harry and Hermione both went upstairs to get into better flying clothes, Usagi and Minako led Ikuko into the next room over for a whirly magical light show. No Shingo, you can't watch Minako get magically naked.

No, Kenji, you're daughter isn't sleeping in her old room tonight. You remember that whole 'husband and wife' thing and that whole 'resurrection' thing? Well, yeah. Deal with it.

While two magical girls, a wizard and a witch got ready... correction, make that two magical girls and two witches... others were saying their goodbyes. Haruka, Michiru and Hotaru went back to the Outer's place in Haruka's sport coup. Ami and Makoto convinced Rei to host them in an impromptu sleepover at her grandfather's shrine. Aside from seeing the Tsukino's off at the gate, no one else remembered when Setsuna or Mamoru made their exits. Shingo felt he was really going to have to try harder to kiss a Senshi the next chance he got after he came up empty tonight. Hell, he'd even take one from that twelve year old Hotaru. Sure she was younger than him, but she was still a Senshi, right?

When two brooms laden with four girls finally took off, Ranma and Shampoo were left alone in the front courtyard of the Tendo home. Thanks to a burst soda, Ranma was a girl at the moment and Shampoo had temporarily wrapped her cat form around Ranma's neck for warmth.

"_Hey, who's there?" _That wasn't Ranma.

"_It's that martial artist... the one who has a curse similar to Lord Potter's." _That wasn't Ranma either.

The ki-master aquatransexual zero'd in on the only three other moderate ki signatures in the courtyard. Cats.

Shampoo leapt down and began meowing at the three. The all black female cat was the first to reply.

"_We do too have a right to be here. My name is Lun__a, by the way... and this is Artemis and Diana. Moon and Venus need to hear a voice of reason every once in a while even if they are way better at fighting evil than they used to be. Diana would usually be with Chibi-usa, but Grandmother Tsukino took her a__nd left while we were napping."_

Shampoo meowed some more.

"_Actually, I'd love some tuna!" _The white male cat jumped at mention of some leftovers.

Shampoo looked back over to Ranma and meowed at her for a minute.

"_Sure thing, Shamps. I'll just do some kata __before heading in."_

As the troop of felines marched into the main house, Ranma began a slow kata in the near freezing courtyard. Ten minutes into an aerial kata, she stopped and stared at a small patch of ground covered in shadows by the perimeter wall. She narrowed her eyes.

"_Un-fucking-believable. Of all the..."_

Ranma leapt onto the roof to do a bit more reconnaissance. Back in the shadows, a light breeze was kicking up dozens of black rose petals.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes:**

Can you spot the Devil Hunter Yohko or Hitchhicker's Guide to the Galaxy references above? Just like Ranma, Harry Potter and Sailor Moon, I also don't own the copyright to these video/literary properties either.

**Reviewers:** I am now removing reviews replies at the chapter ends. General comments will be retained but specific replies will be redacted.


	10. Death of a Schoolgirl

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

...as seen previously on Violence Inherent in the System...

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Ten: Death of a Schoolgirl**

December 23rd , 1996

Harry leaned in closer to the vanity mirror in front of him. Contact lenses could be a real pain sometimes and using the Tendo main bath's mirror rather than the ones in Gryffindor Tower was just different enough to give him trouble..

"_You still wear those things? I expected you to get your vision fixed by Madam Pomfrey or something, like, a while ago."_

Usagi turned to look at him as she relaxed in the furo.

"_She said she couldn't help. I've seen other wizards and witches wearing glasses, so I pretty much assumed that I was stuck."_ Harry replied.

"_We could… I could try to heal you?" _

Harry set down the contact lens he had been trying to force into his left eye and turned to his Love.

"_You think it will work? My eyes haven't been possessed by a demon or anything. I was born this way."_

Usagi stood up causing sheets of water to cascade down her body. His vision may be a bit off, but Harry was still close enough to enjoy the show. The slightly blurry vision of beauty before him reached behind herself with one hand to retrieve the Scepter of Prissiness from… somewhere. Considering Usagi was proudly displaying her lack of clothing, Harry didn't really want to know where she got it from. Note to self: sniff Scepter of Prissiness next time Usagi hands it over.

"_There's only one way to find out, my Harry."_

Harry stepped closer to the furo. As he openly perved on Usagi, she slowly brought the scepter up until it was aimed right between his eyes. A golden glow on Usagi's forehead brought Harry's wandering eyes up. He'd get plenty of time to ogle her later but first they had a breakfast date to make.

Usagi didn't turn into Sailor Moon. She was beginning to think she didn't need too. If Harry was able to use the scepter without transforming then why couldn't she? It's her scepter to begin with, isn't it?

Harry locked eyes with his nude moon goddess… or was she Sailor Starkers?… and simply watched as the glow of her moon sigil was quickly overtaken by the steady build-up of energy in the crystal shaft between them. Harry ignored the two magical lights and focused on the crystal blue orbs locked on to his green ones. Slowly, very slowly, Usagi closed her eyes and Harry couldn't help but to follow her actions and close his eyes as well.

Harry wasn't sure if he imagined it or not, but for the whole time that his eyes were closed, he could swear he still saw Usagi's glowing sigil burning brightly.

"_Harry, my Love. Open your eyes."_

So he did.

"_Love... looks like you're still naked."_ Harry's comment brought soft giggles from the wet Moon Princess.

"_I didn't call on my powers for a dress this time. Sooooo, did it work?" _

Usagi lowered her scepter and released the hold she had on her Lunar magic before noticing just where Harry's gaze had dropped to. Despite the fact that she was standing up in a tub full of hot water... on purpose... she still blushed at his attention.

"_... soooo. The drapes are a shade lighter than the curtains... hadn't noticed that before... "_

"_Harry!"_

"_What? Oh, right." _

Harry quickly looked around the room at things other than Usagi's white-blonde snitch. Water still rolled over Usagi's every curve and fold, reflecting the furo's overhead light in very enticing ways. It was very hard not to stare at The-Most-Fabulous-Object-in-the-World; seeking was in his blood and Usagi was making his blood boil over. Curse his stupid better than ever vision!

"_Ummm... oh-h-h-h-h-h yeahhhhh. Um... way better than twenty-twenty, I'd have to say. I bet I could count every sweet little hair you've down there."_

Usagi giggled and blushed some more. As a result her giggling, things bounced around some.

Harry began to feel light headed... where had all his blood gone off to and who was that voice in his head calling for 'General Quarters'?

"_Quit it (snicker) Harry! We don't want to be late for breakfast, do we?" _

Usagi held a hand over her open mouth... which Harry found odd enough to break him out of his power-ogling. I mean- all the things she's showing and she covers her mouth the moment a giggle breaks out? He just didn't get it.

"_Right, Love. Why don't you just put the Scepter of Prissiness back wherever it goes and finish up? I'll just be over here staring at you the whole time."_ Harry finished with a saucy wink.

Usagi giggled even more. Harry was looking for a snort, but he was going to come up short this time. While both young lovers spent every second of the rest of their clean-up time thinking about what they could be doing... Harry in gratitude for his new perfect vision and Usagi as another payment on that whole resurrection thing... they did finish putting themselves together enough to face the public once more.

Downstairs, they found Hermione sipping tea and reading the local paper as a series of loud slaps and cracks could be heard outside. Harry knew the sound of two martial artists beating the shi- err, sparing, as much as Hermione did and so ignored the outside noises in favor of his favorite witch.

"Didn't know you could read Japanese as well as speak it, 'Mione."

"You mean you can't?"

"The ring translates spoken languages for me... not written. Your earrings are different then?" Hermione nodded. "Maybe I should pick some up then."

"Harry Potter wants a pair of jade hoop earrings? Whatever will his fan-girls say about that?"

"Don't fool yourself. They'll all go out to buy some themselves, only they won't know mine are magical. And the hoops would be easy to pull off if I went girl for longer than usual."

"You have a reason to go girl for longer than usual? And how are you going to keep the hot water away, then?"

"Might have to double for Bunny here," Usagi pouted. She had hoped that Harry didn't notice her Mom's nickname for her. "and after trying and failing to block the curse with spells a dozen times, I finally figured out one that will work."

"Really? How?" This was news to Usagi, though Hermione didn't react.

"Simple. So simple I can't see why I never thought of it before. The Impervius spell doesn't care what temperature water is, it simply repels all water. The spell actually repels pretty much all outside forces whatever they may be. It will wear off unless I renew it of course... just like that waterproof soap Ranma used to talk about, but it'll hold for a few hours per casting or until it's canceled. Should be able to stay in one form for just about as long as I would ever need to."

"Don't tell the Headmaster. He might try something again."

"Oh please for the love of God, 'Mione, don't say that!" Harry looked over Hermione's shoulder at the paper she was holding. "So, what do they say about last night?"

Hermione set down the international news section and showed Harry the front cover. Half the page was devoted to a photo of Harry (as Heather Snape), Moon, Venus and Hermione eating pizza at the mall. Hermione translated the headline for him:

_**SAILOR MOON RETURNS, EATS PIZZA**_

"Hmmmm, pizza! That was fun time, wasn't it?" Usagi was looking over Hermione's other shoulder. She really, really missed pizza.

"There seem to be several stories running at the same time. One deals with the reactions of those who still deny that magic and the Senshi exist. They mostly pass last night off as a well costumed hoax. One story describes the great happiness that nearly everyone feels knowing that Sailor Moon has returned and therefore must have been successfully saved by her fellow Senshi and Heather." Hermione began to push the paper around and point to the articles in question. "Another story noticed that I was with you three and reported rumors of a Senshi recruiting drive in Europe. Locals seem to think it will only be a matter of time until we witches are wearing the Senshi uniform. That article also implies that our indoctrination will involve lesbian sex acts and a rather scandalous use of that scepter you two carry around. Only one article mentions the street gang we found. Seems like the local police would like to talk to the four of us… they were not pleased to hear we took the law into our own hands."

"The recruiting drive seems to be working somewhat. I can change into Sailor Moon in case you haven't noticed... and there is that disguise pen in Moon's magical toy collection. You really could walk around as a Senshi if you wanted too; I'm sure the girls would get a kick out of it."

Hermione sniffed. "Enough propaganda, Harry. I'll think about it, but that's as far as I'll go right now."

Harry silently rejoiced. This was a big change from the flat 'no' he got last time. Now... what outfit to get her into... Sailor Britannia? Sailor Naughty Librarian? Sailor Hogw- no, scratch that one. And for Merlin's sake, let's keep her away from Sailor S.P.E.W.

"I still can't get over how many blokes tried to get my number. I mean, I wasn't trying to act like a girl at all! And I still say that the college guys listening to your dissertation on how transfiguration defies the laws of physics were just staring at your baps the whole time." Harry leaned into Hermione and kissed her temple. "We'll see you after breakfast. Just going to do some more family bonding… maybe I'll see if I can't get some wards set on her parents' house."

After both Harry and Usagi exchanged hugs and kisses with Hermione, the two chased down Luna (the cat, not the human) and Diana before apparating to the Tsukino home. A soft pop later and Hermione was once again left to her paper and the sounds of hand to hand combat.

* * *

Nabiki stared at Hedwig.

Hedwig stared back.

"_Hey, boss. Why is there a bird on my shoulder?"_

Nabiki thought that was a fine question and didn't know what to tell Manny the cameraman. Before anyone could think to call for security, Hedwig barked and held up her leg. Nabiki finally noticed that there was something tied to it.

"_How quaint, a messenger bird."_ Nabiki's comment earned a far less pleasant bark from the snowy white owl before her. _"Sorry, sorry. No need to get your tail feathers in a bunch. Can I have that note now?"_

Hedwig barked in the affirmative, or at least Nabiki thought it sounded positive, so the Tokyo local news reporter reached a hand out and untied the small string wrapped scroll. Much to Nabiki's shock, the scroll tripled in overall size after being released. Magic.

With a widening grin, Nabiki unrolled the scroll and began to read. An owlish bark which translates to 'I want bacon' went unheeded. Feeling unappreciated, Hedwig crapped on Manny's shoulder and flew away.

"… _cordially invited… yadda yadda yadda… eight o'clock tonight… yadda yadda… cameras and sound… yadda… Tendo Dojo, Nerima? That sneaky bit-"_ Nabiki stopped short of actually insulting Pluto.

Seemingly omniscient mahou shoujo probably had enough clout to cancel any interview they set up. Just about any reporter in Japan would kill for an interview like this one and Nabiki wasn't about to throw it all away.

* * *

Malfoy Manor was unusually active for midnight. The above ground floors, anyway… the dungeons were a hive of activity morning, noon and night no matter what. Tonight, Death Eaters and house elves were both doing what they could to make their Dark Lord's special event as spectacular as possible.

The ballroom was spotlessly clean. Rich oak tables to either side supported a feast of rare delicacies, solid gold serving trays and silver serving utensils. Above the tables and open ballroom floor, hundreds of candles floated freely in the air just like they would at a Hogwarts Feast.

Unlike Hogwarts, this ballroom was also decorated by the still living muggles and mudbloods who were abducted for just this occasion. Thirteen of each had been ritualistically stripped and tortured until the victims wore the most pained faces they could produce and then they were magically frozen in place and floated into the air above a gathering of pureblood loyalists and their Death Eater hosts. The floating victims, frequently caught in the middle of violent spasms and contortions or with their entrails hanging out of gaping open wounds, were left alive to further prolong the suffering.

When a Dark Lord enters the bonds of unholy matrimony, you don't skimp on the decorations.

Over the next hour or so, the ballroom slowly filled with dark wizards, their families and their guests until the Dark Groom himself strode imperiously into the room and up to the ceremonial alter. After the requisite amount of groveling and abasement was obtained, Voldemort threw a hand into the air and caused all social chatter to cease.

"Lords and Ladies. Scions and heiresses. Most honored business associates… I thank you for coming to this, my wedding." Voldemort's opening line received strong applause. Good, if it hadn't, there would be some dead purebloods on the floor right about now.

"In recent times, our noble society has come under attack. The weak willed and the common filth of the Earth have somehow come to believe that they should have a say in our future, that they should be able to tell us how to live and where… what we can do and with whom. They seek to restrict our very use of magic to a pathetic collection of spells... spells which need no power or skill and only serve to pull the strong down to the level of the weak. As you all know, I steadfastly oppose such restrictions on our Circe given freedoms."

There was a spattering of polite applause.

"Tonight, I will bless the lovely Narcissa Malfoy nee Black with my blood and my magic, and when I retake that which is rightfully ours back from the sniveling fools who currently control the Ministry of Magic, she shall be a shining beacon of what it means to be a pureblood." Voldemort turned from addressing the floor in general to staring into the main entry doors into the ballroom. "Open the doors!"

As the guests all moved to the sides, a pair of large guilt doors noiselessly slid open to reveal his Dark Bride. Sweet melodies of magical marital chamber music washed through the room as Narcissa began her slow and measured steps up to the altar. In her own mind, she was walking towards eternal suffering from which she doubted even death would free her. The Dark Lord had found for himself some measure of immortality… would he bestow that gift upon her? Would he ensure that she was the perfect trophy wife for all eternity? Narcissa did what she could to scan the room for some of those nice dementors. Surely one of them would be willing to give a congratulatory kiss to the bride, right?

All too soon, her march to the altar was over and she found herself standing to the left of her Dark Groom before a priest. Narcissa ignored the priest as no man of God or Goddess had ever done her any favors that she could remember. Slowly but surely, her self control was beginning to unravel.

We can't have that, can we? The Dark Lord, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, Tom Riddle or Lord Voldemort to those who were brave enough to say it out loud, looked to his Dark Bride and saw her resolve flagging. As the priest began to speak, the Dark Lord cast a discreet Imperio upon her. The woman smiled serenely and her breathing slowed noticeably. He was pleased.

After several pointless minutes harping about dreadfully light subjects such as love and unity, and several more minutes harping about the somewhat more agreeable topic of blood purity and proper breeding, the priest turned his attention to their Lord.

"Do you, Voldemort the Merciless, Ruler of Magical Britain, take this pureblood witch, Lady Narcissa Malfoy nee Black, to be your Empress of the hour?"

"Of the hour, yes." Voldemort replied.

"Do you promise to use her?"

"Certainly."

"Not to blast her into the Veil ..."

This vow earned a raised eyebrow from the Dark Lord. Well, it would have if he had eyebrows. Instead, he leveled a glare at the priest which promised weeks of pain later.

"…until you grow weary of her?" Good answer.

"l do."

The Dark Lord felt no need to prolong things and prompted Narcissa's mind with words of his own devising. Narcissa spoke before the priest could respond.

"My name is Narcissa Malfoy and I am of sound mind. The man next to me is the one I want. You asked me; I'm answering; yes, I love that man of mine."

"Recite after me, My Lord." The priest tried not to shake in fear for his future. "With this ring ..."

As the matrimonial noose slowly tightened around Narcissa's pretty pureblood neck, her soon to be husband's lesser minions were busy preparing wedding celebrations. There was champagne to open, presents to present and muggles to torture. There was also the little business of their Dark Lady's reintroduction into society at large. The Ministry was hosting its Yule Ball tomorrow evening and Voldemort required that his wife be the belle of the ball. If Harry Potter and his Crown Princess did show up, then perhaps he would be able to both kill Potter and claim his first concubine. Voldemort briefly considered maintaining Narcissa as a concubine and wedding the Crown Princess instead, but then he rubbed his forehead and felt the still prominent black charred crescent moon that only she could have given him. Charms prevented others from seeing the crescent, but it never did heal properly. He vowed to himself that when the royal bitch was captured, he would allow each and every one of his servants an evening to use her as they saw fit before she was finally presented to dementors for a little snog.

* * *

Shinjuku was a madhouse.

The supersaturated Tokyo shopping district was overflowing with seasonal shoppers as well as untold thousands of people just out for a good time. In the middle of it all was a tight band of friends, family and loved ones all focused around a black haired English boy and his blonde Japanese Love.

"Thank Merlin for simple cheering charms or I'd go crazy in these crowds."

Harry's broom cupboard childhood left him in no way capable of dealing with such a densely packed shopping crowd, so he cheated. He had Hermione hit him with a cheering charm every fifteen minutes like clockwork. On the plus side, their group was not getting near the attention it would get had they been strolling down Diagon Alley looking for Christmas gifts.

Around Harry was most of his new family. Hanging off either arm was Love and Cuteness. Within arm's reach, he could see Hermione, Usagi's parents and her brother. In a marginally wider ring he found all of the Inner Senshi plus Hotaru who was talking a mile a minute with Cuteness. Harry was a bit surprised when Ranma and Shampoo elected to scout the outer boundaries of their group. One would almost think the two martial artists were expecting someone to take a shot at them.

The group shopped heavily. Not only did the girls all have last minute gifts to take care of, but everyone was quite excited about getting more English visitors in a few days and felt that these foreign friends of Harry needed Christmas gifts. Harry made a mental note to have Dobby warn his friends, lest they come unprepared. Soon enough, Harry escorted the group into Shinjuku's one and only genuine Western magic shop so that they could all get to see real magical artifacts and learn a bit about what some of them did.

Earlier that morning, having breakfast with the Tsukinos, Harry introduced them to his pensieve. That was a real eye opener for the Japanese family… and a real tear jerker too. When Ikuko asked to see a memory of when Harry and Usagi first met, he obliged without even thinking that Usagi was a ghost in that memory. Harry paid much closer attention to which memories went on display after that.

Back to the magic store...

"Repeat customers, you are! Honored, I am to have served your needs so well." The little green goblin shopkeeper was there just as before.

Harry looked over to Hermione. The girl was nearly drooling at the hundreds of books almost within reach. Harry stared at Hermione in confusion until he saw the hint of jade under her ears. That's right! She probably could read them all now. Why Ami herself probably couldn't... hmmmm.

"_Ami?" _

"_Yes, Harry?" _She blushed again. In an alternate universe... but what girl couldn't he say that about really?

"_Those books. How many of them can you actually read?"_

The Senshi of Mercury creased her brow in concentration and looked back over the selection.

"_I believe I could read nearly half of them now. I may need to learn a few more languages before I can translate the others." _

"'Mione? Same question to you."

Both girls were looking confused. If Pluto were here, she would of course have already figured him out, but that's Pluto for you.

"If the titles are any indication, then I should be able to read all but three of them."

Ami's eyebrows shot up at that. She knew the English girl was studious, but to be able to read_ these_ books?

"You got the earrings here, didn't you?" Hermione looked like she was beginning to understand. Hesitantly, she nodded.

Harry turned back to the store owner.

"_Do you accept English wizarding galleons as currency here?" _The little green man nodded in the affirmative. _"Excellent! I wish to purchase one pair of... no, wait... I wish to purchase twenty pairs of Pacific Rim translation earrings just like my friend 'Mione purchased the other day..."_

As Harry pointed to the witch nearby, the store owner nodded happily and everyone else went silent. He wasn't done yet.

"_I'd also like one of every book and scroll you have in stock, two of each if available. Oh! If you have any enchanted book bags or something to make carrying all those books around a bit easier for two very intelligent young women, I'll take those too."_

The store owner nodded happily. Two very intelligent young women within hearing range found themselves quite weak in the knees... my, it's getting hot in here...

"Dobby!"

POP

"The Great Lord Harry Potter calls for Dobby?"

Ikuko jumped nearly a foot off the ground at the diminutive servant's entrance. No one noticed her. They were too enthralled by the grand purchase for two girls he _wasn't _engaged to.

"Would you please settle the bill with our good storekeeper here? There will be quite a lot to take back to the home we're staying in so please ask Kreacher to help if you find it to be a burden."

"H-Harry! What did you just do?" Hermione knew the answer, but embarrassment and denial still ran strong.

"_'Mione. Ami. I must insist that you do not try to peek at your presents until Christmas... unless you pout at me and then I'll probably fall apart and give them to you early anyway." _Harry turned back around to see that everyone was staring at Harry in wonder. _"What? I know very well what these two want for Christmas and in case you didn't know, I'm rich. I could literally swim in my gold filled vaults just like Scrooge McDuck always did __on the telly."_

"_You can't swim through piles of gold, Harry. Galleons are not drops of water for you to push through."_

"_Hello? Magic? There must be a spell for swimming in gold. That's just the kind of thing a pureblood would come up with to put on the N.E.W.T.s."_

Hermione considered the lunacy for a moment before coming to the only possible conclusion_. "I suppose it does sound like a good N.E.W.T. charms question, doesn't it? God forbid they test us on any magic that actually seems useful in normal everyday life."_

Now that Dobby was fully engaged in dealing with the store owner, Harry began to drift away from the counter. Usagi almost asked for more detail on the N.E.W.T.s and what kinds of things they would be tested on but then she saw a display case full of enchanted jewelry. Shiny!

"_After I've married Usagi and defeated Voldemort, I'll help you overhaul the English magical educational system. How's that sound?"_

"_This is after you read my thesis on House Elves and my books on social injustices of the wizarding world?"_

"_That's right."_

"_I'd like that a very much, thank you."_

The group spent another ten minutes in Shinjuku's magic shop going over its wares. After finding the 'oh, shiny' display, Harry ended up getting magical jewelry with various types of enchantments for just about every witch he knew by name. Now that he was _Assistant Professor_ Potter, that list has grown exponentially since October.

As lunch rolled around, the group loosened up some. Harry, Usagi and Cuteness led the line with the little pink haired girl constantly holding her parents hands. The three talked very little and smiled a lot.

Behind them, Ikuko assumed control of Hotaru, Hermione and the Inner Senshi. Most of their conversations revolved around what Hermione could tell everyone else about Harry from the first meeting on the train on up. When Ikuko wasn't listening… or was pretending not to listen… they gossiped heavily about Harry's bedroom skills and debated whether or not Usagi was still likely to let other girls into the marital bed. Was Harry truly verboten now? Ikuko almost choked on her iced coffee when Minako suggested Rei offer to go through Harry to get Usagi again. The elder Tsukino woman knew for years that her daughter was a different... special... even magical but she never imagined that Usagi would experiment with other girls. She wasn't even in college yet!

Behind the girls, Kenji and Shingo were left to their own devices and spent most of their time observing female anatomy. To be fair, Kenji spent a good bit of time coming up with ideas for how to get his wife in the mood later tonight. Spending so much time around this many teenaged magical girls was giving him dirty thoughts… very dirty thoughts about how a defeated Sailor Ikuko could convince Dark General Kenji to spare her life for the right price. Buwah-ha-ha-ha!

Trailing the group by a dozen meters or so, one could spot Ranma and Shampoo. They looked as loose and carefree as anyone else, but then that was one of the cornerstones of the Saotome Ryu. Looks were deceiving. Ranma knew they were being watched and was keeping tabs on their uninvited guest. At least whoever it was wasn't willing to make a scene here in the full holiday crowds, whoever they were.

Walking out of the Nerima local rail station may as well have been a signal to the local spirits. Even though the Inner Senshi went back to Azabu-Juuban , there were still far too many powerful people in far too small an area for nothing to explode.

Ranma was once again near the tail end of the group when he heard a faint sparking, hissing noise. Homing in on the source, he saw something he had seen far too many times before for his liking: a massively oversized firecracker with a lit fuse.

"_DOWN!" _

Harry, Usagi and Cuteness all reacted to Ranma's yell though Hotaru, Hermione and the Tsukinos were caught off guard.

_**BOOOM!**_

As bits of shrapnel and water from a busted pipe rained down upon the group, a shaken Harry Potter tried to recover.

"_Sweeeto!" _

Harry struggled to regain her equilibrium but a tiny wriggling mass had attached itself to her chest. Looking down, she found a horridly wrinkled old face buried in her cleavage.

"_Hmmm. Not too big and not too little. I'd say you're just about right, my dear."_

Harry's brain locked up. Why was a house elf molesting her?

"_And no bra! Don't do this often tootsie or you'll be saggy before too long."_

"_Get off her you old freak!"_

Ranma's fist blurred by Harry, but the diminutive troll had already moved on to greener pastures.

"_Eeeeeeeek! Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!"_

"_Twins! Such youthful beauty in stereo! It does my old heart good."_ Ranma's foot passed through an after image of what had just been latched onto Usagi's chest. _"At least one of you cares enough to wear silky underthings… maybe you're not so identical upstairs then…OW!"_

Ikuko would have been the next girl in line, but a white and purple haired cat leapt into his projected flight path and sank her claws into his face.

"_Shampoo! What would your great grandmother think of –__**GURK**__!" _

Sampoo's jump bought Ranma just enough time to snag the wrinkly old man and punt him as hard as she could. Being a ki-master, her distance was measured in kilometers instead of meters.

"_What was that?" _Ikuko yelled out the question while holding her arms crossed tightly over her chest. She had seen where the little demon was going next.

"_That… was the grandmaster of my martial arts school, Happosai."_

The three Senshi present grimaced as did Ikuko. Every female in Tokyo knew the stories of Happosai the Panty Thief. It was a rare breed of pervert indeed who could steal your delicates in broad daylight while you were still wearing them.

"_I'm goin' to play a game of crush the troll. Don't wait up!"_ With that, Ranma leapt up an adjacent building wall, over to the nearest roof and then began roof hopping in the direction that Grandmaster Happosai was last seen heading.

Harry let out a breath she didn't even remember holding in. Too bad the excitement wasn't over yet.

When next the wind picked up, a cloud of black rose petals fell onto the street.

"_OH-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!"_ High pitched imperious laughter washed over the tense group_. "So the red headed whore has retired from the field of battle already, has she? Fine! It's such a pity that my dear Ranma was not present __to witness her betrayal."_

Shampoo hissed in anger, the hairs on her tail standing straight out. Everyone else turned to see who it was.

"_Yes! Gaze upon my beauty and be humbled, for I am the Rose Empress of Tokyo University, Kuno Kodachi."_

"_Kodachi, huh? Ranma told me about you… " _

Harry did a snap assessment of the young woman standing atop a light post nearby. She was a classical Japanese beauty, not unlike Rei, with dark eyes and long, silky black hair tied into a high pony tail. Winter or not, the woman wore a skin tight black leotard with a pair of black ballet slippers and a thin choker. Looking at her chest, one could immediately tell that Kodachi was cold whether she chose to admit it or not.

"_Did he now?"_ The gothic gymnast went from atop the light post to within Harry's personal space in one graceful leap, causing Harry to flinch back_. "I do believe you are being far too familiar with my noble stallion. What is your name, peasant?"_

Harry remembered what Ranma said about this crazy bitch and Shampoo's aggravated hissing only served to reinforce the lesson. Kodachi was one of Ranma's high school stalkers, a real mental case from the wealthy and dubiously noble house of Kuno. She and her brother never really understood Ranma's curse so they both chose to sexually assault the side they liked and murder the side they didn't. This odd counterbalance of sex and violence lead to Ranma's having frequent Kuno themed nightmares to this very day.

Harry began to think of this woman as a mentally unstable Malfoy. Unstable or not, Kodachi was a skilled fighter and Harry very much doubted she could get a wand out before being beaten soundly. Her gaze drifted over Kodachi's shoulder to Hermione. Maybe if they got her from behind?

"_Snape. I'm Heather Snape."_

"_Sister, did you hear? Heather, a fair flower of the West, a pure child who turns the dark magics of witchcraft back upon foul creatures in defense of the weak and needy... it is she who graces us with her presence this day." _

Oh, damn. Harry would bet her trust vault that the man who uttered that phrase was the other Kuno Ranma always badmouthed. Without warning, Harry was forcibly spun around and snatched up into a close embrace.

Off to one side, Usagi was seething. Who the hell were these people and what the hell gave them the right to push around _**her**_Harry?

Hermione was biting her lip hard enough to draw blood. Only the thought that Harry would obviously need her wand at the ready kept the curly brown haired witch from pissing herself laughing. Weird things happened to Harry all the time, but never anything like this!

"_But where are my manners? It is I, the Scion of the noble bloodline of the House of Kuno, who is called Tatewaki, the Mighty Crimson Blade of Tokyo University!"_ The idiot who now held Harry's hands captive in his own stared down into her face in a way that some girls may have thought flattering… if they were high on several drugs at the same time.

"_You attend Toho Gakuen College of Drama and Music, brother dear."_ Kodachi corrected Tetewaki. _"And I cannot allow these harridans the opportunity to stay under the same roof as my dear Ranma. I am most fortunate that the wretch of a man known as Happosai was willing to help me defend Ranma from such filth as this foreign trollop. If you cannot woo her and the red haired devil who continues to bewitch him then I shall have to deal with them more harshly."_

Kodachi muttered under her breath. _"At least I made it into Tokyo University, even if I did have to bribe or drug half of the admissions office."_

"_And look, what's this? You have a twin?"_

Ohhh, fu- in a blur of motion, Harry somehow found herself nose to nose with Usagi, both of them crushed into the firm pecks of the Mighty Gay Blade or whatever he called himself.

"_So beautiful! I must have them both!" _

"_I heartily approve, brother dear. Claim these two while you can before they sink their claws into my Ranma."_

Hotaru and the Tsukinos were struck dumb by the ludicrous act playing out before them. Well, Kenji was also quickly heating up at the casual disregard these two were showing his daughter and her fiancé. Hermione knew her options were quickly becoming limited, so she drew her wand.

If only Kodachi wasn't watching for just such a move.

"_Oh-ho! What's this?"_ A black silk ribbon shot out from Kodachi's hand and wrapped itself around Hermione's wand. Quick as lighting, Kodachi had the wand twirling between her fingers. _"A wand! The foreign witch was going to use a wand on me, brother. Looks like someone needs an example made of them!"_

Deep in a forced cuddle, two blue eyed blondes stared at each other in alarm.

"Enough of this shit." Usagi whispered. "Grab this."

Harry felt a familiar crystal handle rub up against the back of her palm.

"Change as soon as he let go." Harry nodded at Usagi's whispered command and took the Scepter of Prissiness.

As their foreheads were pressed firmly together, Harry couldn't see Usagi's sigil glow, but she could feel Usagi's magic arc through the sigil and connect to hers. That tickled!

An intense flash of light burst out from the blondes, nearly blinding both Kunos and causing everyone else to flinch back as if staring into the sun. Tatewaki Kuno released his captive loves.

"Moon Crisis! Make-up!"

Buried within the white flash which started Usagi's transformation, Harry Potter once more experienced the naked whirly light show that defined all mahou shoujo.

By the time everyone's eyesight returned, Sailor Moon had a choke hold on Tatewaki Kuno while pointing her crystal scepter at Kodachi. To be fair, both brother and sister were so shocked at the presence of such esteemed magical company that they made no attempt to escape or attack.

The Moon Princess toyed with Hermione's wand while slowly walking around Sailor Moon and the Kunos.

"_Mere peasants are we?" _Usagi Serenity spun on a crystal heel and drew close to the Kunos. _"True nobility stems from the heart and not from the blood which flows through it. The two of you will contemplate this fact. In the mean time… Pluto!"_

"_Yes Your Highness?" _

Neptune and Uranus released their holds on Pluto's Garnet Rod and stepped away from their teleport ride in. The three new arrivals bowed respectfully to their Princess.

"_These two are an annoyance if not particularly dangerous. Please see them off." _As Usagi finished her statement, Moon released Kuno's neck. She had more than enough backup to keep these two in line now.

"_As you will it, Highness."_ Sailor Hotness gave another bow and quietly tapped each gaping Kuno on the shoulder with the butt of her intricately detailed staff.

Hermione spoke up in a rather meek voice. _"You didn't Banish them. Did you?"_

Sailor Hotness smiled innocently. _"No, Miss Granger. The young man was sent exactly one week into the future where he may ponder his life in the middle of a sleet storm. I sincerely doubt anyone will miss him until then. The young lady was sent not through time but space, to Sweet Devil which is a club of sorts. There she will find her true calling in life."_

Sailor Chibi-Moon and Sailor Saturn stepped into the ring of older Senshi.

"_See, Saturn? I told you it's just like having two Mommies!" _Chibi-Moon hugged the waist of her sometimes father and stuck her tongue out at the Senshi of Silence.

"_Fine! You can borrow Marmalade Boy for a week, but only a week and then I want it back."_

"_Okay!"_

As the two shortest mahou shoujo bickered back and forth, Evil Twin Moon looked around. Hermione and the Tsukino's were a few meters off just as before, but now about two dozen or so locals were out on the street watching… some of them with camcorders and digital cameras.

"_Pluto? Shouldn't we find somewhere to change back soon?"_

"_That will not be necessary Moon, Your Highness. Even now a news crew is arriving at the Tendo property and will soon set up their equipment. Two magical journalists will join us as well. As this will all be in the news tomorrow morning, I do not see why we can't walk the few remaining blocks as we are." _ Pluto advised her Princess.

Usagi grinned like a loon and nodded back. This was fun! She was going to go full princess more often!

Shingo was conflicted. On one hand, he had just seen part of a Senshi transformation. A hot girl spun around naked and he saw part of it. On the other hand, that was his sister's body. On the other other hand, it wasn't really his sister. On the other other other hand, it was really a guy. Shingo feared his erection could be proof of incesty thoughts or gayness. Seeing that Saturn actually did look kinda good for a twelve year old gave him that cradle robber feel too. He needed desperately to get back home to his healthy, normal, everyday porn for a soul cleansing jerk off.

* * *

Nabiki did wait a minute at the front gate, but when no one came she pulled out the 'childhood home' card and walked in anyway. Even with the cold weather, she elected to set up in the family room with a set of shoji open to the pond. If her family home was going to make national news... maybe international news... and she wanted to present the best image possible.

"_Tendo Nabiki, reporting for TV Tokyo at the Tendo Dojo in Nerima... For TV Tokyo, I'm Tendo Nabiki in Nerima... Eastern and Western magic meet here in Nerima district of Tokyo. I'm Tendo Nabiki and this is TV Tokyo." _

"_This is Tee Vee Tokyo? Where? I want to see!" _

Nabiki jumped a bit, a move that got her cameraman and sound technician both holding in their laughter. They both saw the girl's dirty blonde hair and silver gray eyes coming while their 'boss' was preoccupied.

'At least it wasn't Pluto this time.' Nabiki mused before dipping into a polite bow. _"Good evening. My name is Tendo Nabiki. I'm very pleased to meet you."_

The new arrival smiled brilliantly before returning the bow. _"Good evening to you as well. My name is Lovegood Luna. Most people I have met were not very pleased to meet me though that does seem to be changing of late. I'm very pleased to meet you Miss Tendo."_

Nabiki was almost not surprised to see a middle aged man appear out of thin air behind Miss Lovegood. Luna saw Nabiki and her crew look behind her and turned.

"Mister Anderson! It's been a while!"

"Miss Lovegood. How is your father, dear? Still looking for the Ministry's heliopaths?"

"I'm afraid not. It appears that all of the evidence he was looking for met a fiery end." Arthur had to laugh.

"But where are my manners?" Luna looked between the Daily Prophet and TV Tokyo reporters. "Arthur? This is Nabiki Tendo who reports for Tee Vee Tokyo. _Miss Tendo? This is Anderson Arthur of the Daily Prophet. No doubt he is here for the same reason as we are._"

Mister Anderson may not speak the local language and Luna may be eccentric no matter where she is, but the three got along well once it was clear they were all there for the same reason. Nabiki's techs, Kaji and Manny were also introduced and the five kept each other company until the interviewees arrived, not that there wasn't plenty of newsworthy information being passed in the meet 'n' greet.

Luna was a witch was she? And Mister Anderson a wizard? Perfect. Nabiki finally had a second source for so many of the little tidbits Cuteness uttered in passing that Nabiki never really had a chance to go back and check on. If the real interview were even half as interesting as this little gossip circle (and she had every reason to believe it would be much more so) then Nabiki was about to have her best Christmas ever. Five minutes into a discussion about magic and how too much of it will interfere with electronics, Nabiki saw her sound technician openly gape at something behind her.

"_Kaji, what is it?" _ Without waiting for an explanation, Nabiki turned around.

"Hello Luna! Hello Mister Anderson_." _Lord Harry James Potter was behind her at the head of a column of mahou shoujo. "I knew we were speaking to the press tonight, but I didn't know you two would be part of it."

The Tendo home's family room was a respectable sized room, doubly so if you consider property values in Japan, but it couldn't hold five members of the Third Estate plus twelve guests.

"_Eh, Boss Lady."_ Manny calmly stated, _"We're gonna need a bigger room."_

As none of the four English magical were comfortable enough with space expansion charms to fix up the family room, Nabiki suggested they move out to the dojo. Chibi-Moon glared at Nabiki and Nabiki winked back at her. Soon enough introductions were made all around and only one small surprise came out of the exchange.

"_Luna Lovegood, reporting for Witch Weekly!" _ Dirty blonde hair bounced enthusiastically with her bow.

"_Witch Weekly? You're not working for your father today?" _Luna's announcement was making Harry nervous. He had never actually read a copy of Witch Weekly, but he heard about them.

"_No, I'm not Harry. Daddy's got the next three Quibbler's all ready for print so that he can go after a truly mythical creature… one that we're not really sure exists."_

A mythical creature that the Lovegood's didn't believe in? _"And what creature would that be, Luna?"_

"_The Honest Politician. Daddy keeps hearing about them, but he's never seen one."_ Luna looked quite serious. _"He's determined to keep looking until he finds one this time."_

"_Tell him that he can safely avoid Japan, Miss Lovegood."_ Nabiki commented. _"I've been searching here for years and still haven't found one."_

"_Good to know."_ Luna made a note of it with parchment and quill.

The next five minutes were nearly silent as all of the locals watched the wizards and witches summon, conjure and transfigure a series of tables, couches and chairs. After a few comments from the technicians, everything was set up. There was, centered halfway down one of the long walls, a love seat for the Crown Princess and her Lord to share as the main interviewees. To one side, a table had been set up for three journalists and their writing needs. To the other side, a group of couches and padded seats held Hermione, Shampoo, the Tsukinos and the remaining Senshi in attendance. Nabiki would have given her right leg for a full news studio right then… she only had two cameras and that was only if magic didn't kill one or both of them outright.

The cameras were turned on and recording. Enchanted quills were writing. Chibi-Moon had to go potty. Okay, she was back. Official introductions were made on camera. Finally, things could get going.

"_Good evening. I'm Tendo Nabiki, reporting to you from Nerima, Tokyo. This evening, I find myself surrounded not only by Japan's beloved Senshi but by real wizards and witches from a magical world hidden right in front of us. Magic! There's so much I could ask, I almost don't know where to begin."_

Pluto stepped in to give the proceedings a some direction. _"May I suggest a history lesson? The Moon Kingdom predates the modern Wizarding World…"_

For the next half hour, Pluto gave a history lesson unlike any previously given in the non-magical world. She wove a tale much like the one given in the Great Hall of Hogwarts, only she didn't stop with the downfall of the Silver Millennium. She told of a young teen who stopped to save an abused cat and how that girl became Sailor Moon. She mentioned how Sailor Moon gained new allies while constantly one misstep away from death or enslavement by any number of alien and demonic invaders. Cuteness and everything surrounding the vertically challenged time traveler was heavily edited. The first big break in her narrative came when the young heroine took a tragic misstep during a school field trip and was magically shot deep into the interior of China where her very soul was imprisoned in a magic spring.

Nabiki took that as her cue to interrupt. _ "If I may…"_

"_Please do." _ Pluto yielded the floor.

"_TV Tokyo's audience will no doubt remember just over a year ago when a Juuban High School student by the name of Tsukino Usagi disappeared during a school field trip. Considering that Miss Tsukino's family is here with us tonight, I have to ask… is Miss Tsukino Sailor Moon?"_

On the central love seat, a silver haired Crown Princess looked into the eyes of the man she planned to marry in less than a year. No words were necessary as they both knew this would happen tonight. Princess Usagi kissed her man and stood up.

There were a lot of people in the world that Usagi felt deserved to know who she was. There were some, like her own family, that she always suspected knew. Now everyone would know, and she was scared. Never again would she be able to pass for a normal girl.

Harry Potter may have brought Usagi back to life a couple of days... mere hours ago... but Miss Tsukino was about to die. For the first time, Usagi herself realized that her old life, her 'civilian identity' was going to be shot to pieces as soon as this interview aired. Kaji and Manny were her firing squad.

With a tear falling down her left cheek, Usagi dropped into a deep bow towards the camera.

"_I am deeply sorry for hiding such an important part of my life from those who were closest to me. A magical girl cannot reveal herself without endangering her closest friends and family. Because my disappearance did not go unnoticed, I could not return without being noticed. I am truly blessed to have been rescued from the Pools of Sorrow by Harry Potter. Without Harry, I would have been forced to either surrender myself to the government for protection or disappear into the world at large... a very dangerous thing for any young woman to attempt whether they are magical or not. With him, I can still do what I was born to do and my loved ones will be protected. "_

Still deep in her bow, Usagi let her Princess transformation drop. In a sense, Usagi Tsukino only had minutes to live. She pulled out of her bow and deep blue eyes met the camera.

"_Many thousands of years ago, I was born Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon. Eighteen years ago, I was born Tsukino Usagi, a normal girl in Tokyo like any other. Four years ago, I became Sailor Moon."_

Usagi was not finished apologizing. The guilt and heartache of living a secret life for years pushed her on. She turned to her parents and bowed again.

"_Father. Mother. I am so very sorry for the worry you felt when I slipped out of the house, night after night, to do battle with beings which tried very hard to kill me. I am also sorry for the trouble you will encounter in the future because my secret life will not remain so."_

Ikuko was trying very hard to hold the tears back. Trying very hard and failing. When Usagi returned her gaze to the camera, she bowed one more time.

"_Naru. I am so very sorry that your life was endangered by being my childhood friend. Even keeping my magical identity secret from you did no good as demons, daemons and youma seemed to flock to you like flies to honey. By the Gods, one even fell in love with you." _ When Usagi looked up, tears were streaming down both cheeks.

"_I am sorry that being Sailor Moon took away so much time that we drifted apart as friends. I...I can't go back to school with you because magical girls can't openly attend public schools and I- I missed a whole year anyway." _The girl's voice was cracking. _"M- My life as an ordinary schoolgirl named Tsukino Usagi is over. I… I'm sorry I can't do this anymore... I just..."_

Usagi spun around and collapsed into Harry's waiting arms.

Nabiki thought about shutting off the cameras. She sure as hell didn't do it, but she did think about it.

"_Harry. Why don't you take Usagi out to the pond. I believe she might find strength enough to continue if you get her away from the cameras for a minute." _ Harry nodded at Pluto's suggestion.

Anyone looking at his face could see that he would do literally anything to help take Usagi's pain away. He picked up his princess in a bridal carry and stepped out of the room with a weepy Ikuko only one step behind.

As the very emotional trio stepped past a rice paper shoji screen and disappeared from view, Pluto noticed a late arrival to the game. No one said that the interview had to stop here.

"_Ranma. How nice of you to drop by. Would you be a dear and discuss Jusenkyo and its effects with our guests tonight? As simple description and a demonstration or two would be quite helpful."_

A reluctant ki-master stood before two curious English magicals and a very smug looking ex-fiancée (it was only for a short time, but it still counts). As Ranma explained the Pools of Sorrow, Harry and two very weepy females were ambushed by five more very weepy females.

"_Usagi! Oh, hun... you'll never have to apologize to me for anything!" _

"_Naru!"_ Usagi looked up from Harry's wet shirt.

Osaka Naru, former very best friend of Miss Usagi Tsukino, wrapped her arms tightly around the girl in Harry's arms. Around them, Harry could see the other Inner Senshi in their civilian identities closing in to make this a group hug.

"_Sailor Pluto went and found us... she said Usagi would need support from her close school friends for the very brave thing she was doing tonight."_ Minako may have been playing her part, but she was still choked up seeing Usagi like this.

Naru snorted through her tears. _"Please, honey. I know you four are neck deep in it. Auntie Ikuko knows too, I bet. Let's not have anymore secrets tonight, huh? Just for one night?"_

A few minutes later, Usagi was standing under her own power and reaffirming her lifelong devotion to Naru.

"_Ahhhh, shit! I've been crying so long that I must look like a monster by now!" _ Usagi bemoaned her condition as she was finally ready to head back to the cameras.

"Don't worry, I'll get 'Mione to come out here and take care of it." Harry pulled back a step and cast a Patronus messenger towards his best childhood friend Hermione.

After getting cleaned up, everyone put their best foot forward... four of them changing into their Senshi forms... and returned to the dojo. As luck (or Pluto) would have it, Ranma was done with his/her/his/her/his demonstration and thus the general public was finally ready to learn about Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived. Then there was the story of the Chosen One... the Boy-Who-Fell-In-The-Spring-Of-Drowned-Sailor-Moon... Heather Snape... Assistant Professor Potter... the Betrothed One and his Betrothal Contract with the Crown Princess of the Moon.

Resurrection.

By the time Nabiki was satisfied with her understanding of his history... and by the time Luna and Arthur were both done getting specific details which were only vaguely known about in magical England, Usagi was once again ready to answer questions. Chibi-Moon and Saturn were both asleep cuddled up against Ikuko.

Break time. A quick take-away dinner was served and two sleeping mahou shoujo were taken to Nabiki's old room for bedtime. Pluto suppressed all of the old surveillance devices Nabiki left in her old room 'just in case'.

"_Soooo. You've told us quite a tale tonight about amazing long dead civilizations, failed alien invasions and Dark Lords that go bump in the night... may I ask what's next?" _ Nabiki looked hopefully at Usagi.

Usagi smiled and leaned back into Harry. _"Yes. Before I died... this last time, not the times before... before I died I had a destiny that seemed set in stone. Jusenkyo changed everything. I spent half of a year as a ghost! Why, there are things about being a ghost that I actually miss now!"_

Usagi subconsciously slid back a little further into Harry. There was a time- hell, only three days ago- when she would have passed right through Harry and damn if she didn't miss that unique loving experience no matter how awesome pizza was!

"_My new future is much more all encompassing than it was before. Before, I had my heart and mind focused on defending Tokyo like I always did and living happily ever after_." Usagi was starting to warm up and get into the spirit of things. She didn't even feel it when she changed back into her Moon Princess form on camera._ "While my old vision of the future seemed good enough at the time, I truly believe that we can do so much better! I can't sit in one city and wait for evil beings to come looking for me. The entire Earth needs protecting and those with the power to protect her cannot be so narrow minded as to protect only one city or only one country. More than that, my mother's legacy lies broken and tattered on the surface of Mars and in orbit around Jupiter and on the face of the Moon. I intend to rebuild the ancient kingdoms which flourished so many millennia ago. I intend to help Harry heal the wounds the Wizarding World still sports from two recent Dark Lords. It seems like so much to take on, doesn't it? (she giggles a bit) Of course we'll put our very best efforts into making all of these dreams become reality one step at a time. The first step to all of this is my betrothal to Harry. We're getting married."_

Nabiki noticed the Moon Princess's pause and prompted her with a few quick questions. _"Sailor Moon getting married! Has there ever been a magical girl wedding in Japan? "_

"_I wouldn't know about other kinds of magical girls... Devil Hunters come from maternal lines so it would make sense for all of them to get married at some point. This would be the first Senshi wedding since the fall of the Silver Millennium." _Usagi looked over to Pluto briefly and saw an approving nod.

"_And you're a Crown Princess to boot. I don't doubt half of Japan will want to attend. Do you have a date picked out? A location? I'm sure just about any temple in Japan would love to host Sailor Moon's wedding and a lot of __us normal people will want time to plan around you."_

"_The ceremony will be here in Tokyo." _Usagi was staring into Harry's eyes while talking now_. "July thirty-first… it's Harry's birthday. We just started working on the other details but I do want to start with something very small and private before doing something big and public."_

Arthur spoke up_, "Dark Lord Voldemort is still causing terror and destruction in the Wizarding World. Are you concerned that he may seek to disrupt your ceremony?"_

Harry and Usagi looked at each other for a moment before Harry answered.

"_If he hasn't been taken care of by summer, I'll write his invitation myself. I'll take him down with the whole world watching if I need to to ensure that Usagi's vision of the future comes to pass."_

Nabiki usually hated it when a couple she was interviewing got all lovey-dovey on camera but this was different. She had a magical girl princess and her wizard lord fiance staring into each other's eyes and blushing hard. What followed was the couple's first on screen kiss… one that seemed to go on forever though nobody felt like trying to break it up. Nabiki was going to be shitting gold soon.

In a muted voice, Pluto spoke up. _"I believe we have time for one last question. Miss Lovegood? You haven't had one recently."_

Luna nods thankfully to Pluto before turning to the happy couple.

"_Usagi. Will you permit me to lay with your husband again, and if so, will you be joining us this time?" _ Before anyone could pick their jaw up off the floor and stop blushing, Luna turned to Hermione. _"Assistant Professor Granger. Do you know a spell that can suppress my gag reflex? I'd like to learn within the next two days if possible."_

"_I believe that you will get those answers off the record shortly, Miss Lovegood."_ Pluto took control before Usagi could say anything incriminating.

Nabiki silently cursed. She really, really wanted to hear the answer to that one. She had indirect evidence that 'Heather Snape' slept with Sailor Venus last summer and now this young witch was implying that she had sex with Harry Potter and Princess Usagi already knew about it. All she could do was think of how rich and famous she was about to become and do her closing statements.

"_Thank you Sailor Pluto. Thank you, Sailor Moon and Lord Potter. This is Tendo Nabiki in the Tendo Dojo, Nerima for TV Tokyo."_

After a wink and a bow, Nabiki signaled her boys to shut it all down. Better to play nice than to have Pluto kill all of their priceless magical girl interview footage.

* * *

In the dead of night, officially the early morning of Christmas Eve, Harry Potter pulled her blanket off and sat up. The Tendo dojo was jam packed with girls and women; a sleepover of epic proportions.

To either side of her, Harry could see Hermione and Luna both close enough to share body warmth in a three piece witch sandwich. Luna was allowed to start her Tokyo trip early, otherwise she would have spent Christmas alone this year as her father forgot to make holiday arrangements while hunting the elusive Honest Politician.

Behind her, Usagi was getting similar treatment from Naru and Rei. Just off to one side, Harry could see where they had retrieved the two younger Senshi and gently forced both girls to de-transform and wear cotton nightshirts. Cuteness and Hotaru both cuddled into Ikuko's side, a move that made the Tsukino matron remember an earlier time when her own daughter was just her Little Bunny. The other Senshi were grouped mostly near their Princess, but some were a little further away than others. In a rare show of team spirit, even Setsuna was stretched out on the floor with a line of drool running from her gently parted lips to the pillow under her head. Apparently Hotness was cold. At least, Harry thought she must be cold seeing how hard the green haired sleeping beauty's nipples were trying to pierce the thin layer of silk that passed for a teddy.

Harry quickly turned her eyes elsewhere. She really didn't want to get aroused here surrounded by all of these hot, soft, flexible- _stop it!_ Ranma and Shampoo were off to one end. The buxom redhead's hand seemed to have found a nice warm spot between Shampoo's- _crap!_

Harry desperately fought to reign in her pervyness and set about casting a fresh set of warming charms on the dojo floor. She gently rose to her feet and tip-toed through torsos and entangled limbs before making a clean get-away to the bathroom.

Dear sweet Usagi. With her Lunar eye surgery, Harry felt as confident as a cat slipping through the starlit courtyard and dark home for her late night potty break.

It was only when her bladder was empty and she was leaving the bathroom that she found herself pleasantly surprised by a soft pair of arms wrapping around her midsection.

"Usagi? What are- ohhhhhh, yeahhhh…" Harry couldn't think any further after her fiancée began to rain little kisses and nibbles on her neck.

"I was thinking, my Harry." Usagi's finger tips ran over Harry's belly and up the sides of her ribcage. "That body doesn't come with an owner's manual. There are a few things I could teach you about being you."

Harry had to fight to keep her eyes from rolling back into her head. Gooseflesh popped up everywhere Usagi touched her. "I think… I think Minako already gave me that lesson, remember?"

"She knows girls, sure… but that's my body you're wearing Mister Potter and I know it better than anyone."

"Well sure it's your body but- _whoa!_ Ahhhhh…" Usagi wasn't playing fair. She really did know where all the good buttons to push were and she was using every one of them.

"What was that, my Harry? Did you say something?"

"Uh… yeah, I'll take that lesson now, please."

Harry couldn't see Usagi behind her, but she could feel the blonde smile against her neck. Who was the Evil Twin now?

When twin blondes quietly re-entered the dojo some time later, a small wave of tittering and whispers washed across the floor.

"_Finally, my pillow came back."_

"_Naughty, naughty!"_

"_Two minutes in the box for high sticking!"_

"_I don't get it."_

"_I don't think there was a stick involved but that was definitely longer than two minutes!"_

"_I still don't get it."_

"_Girls. Bed. Now."_

"_Busted!"_

"_Sorry Auntie Tsukino." "Sorry Mom."_

"_We'll talk about this in the morning. Get back to sleep."_

There was some light shuffling around. Usagi and Harry both tried to pretend very hard that they did not just get caught by Usagi's Mom doing dirty things. Eventually every girl in the room would get back to sleep though it would take longer for some than others.

Harry was the last to fall back asleep, not that she was trying very hard. She was surrounded by friends and loved ones and sleeping on a dojo floor in soft pajamas. This beat the shit out of sleeping in the Great Hall during Third Year.

This was going to be Harry's best Christmas ever!

* * *

Some hours earlier.

As soon as the ornate staff touched her, Kodachi felt the world around her blur and shift. Street became tile and sky became ceilings. Looking around, she found herself to be in a rather well appointed private lounge.

_"And they always claim my beloved Ranma darling couldn't pull the same trick. The fools…"_

Only, Kodachi was feeling quite the fool today. She was always of the opinion that real magical girls would be born into the upper class… who else deserved to wield such awesome powers but the ones who are trained from birth to wield power?

Today, she was proven wrong.

Tatewaki hadn't even let the girls go… there was no chance to trade places with a young lady of station… and Kodachi knew that the one called 'Your Highness' by Sailor Pluto was true royalty. Her twin, the one who seemed the lesser of the two was still a Senshi. The young ladies both had that feel of power and nobility that always got Kodachi excited when she found it – the power she always expected herself to wield one day.

'True nobility stems from the heart and not from the blood which flows through it.' That is what Her Highness said before casually dismissing two of Japan's elite. Kodachi's heart sank. Could she be right? As Kodachi reviewed her own upbringing, her head dropped. She could no longer ignore the times in her past where she herself acted the part of a lowborn whore despite her upbringing.

"_Who are you?"_ A harsh question, even if it was delivered by a soothing and seductive voice.

"_I am the Rose Emp- no…" _ Kodachi couldn't even use her self appointed title. _"Kuno Kodachi."_

"_We have heard of you here." _

The sharp tak-tak-tak of stiletto heels closed in on Kodachi's position. The end of a riding crop was pressed up under her chin and used to raise her head.

"_Who sent you here?"_

The woman seemed to be Kodachi's age. She had an exquisite figure wrapped in tight shiny black leather with silver and lace accessories. In this woman's eyes, Kodachi saw power- not magical power, but a power held over men. It was a power Kodachi always thought she had as well. Perhaps not.

"_Sailor Pluto."_

"_Pluto? A magical girl sent you to us? Why?"_

Kodachi nodded_. "I insulted Her Highness. I failed to see her nobility. It was hidden but a woman of my station should have been able to see it, right?"_

"_So you have lost your way… pity. Do you wish to return to the proper path?"_

Kodatchi nodded feverishly. _"Yes!"_

_**-SNAP-**_

The woman's riding crop came down hard across Kodachi's right cheek.

"_Yes what?"_

"_Yes, Mistress?"_

_**-SNAP-**_

"_Yes, Mistress!"_

"_Better."_

The woman circled Kodachi, often whipping her with the riding crop or barking out simple commands. By the time her circuit was complete, Kodachi's posture was flawless and the aura of failure had been stripped away.

"_I can work with this."_

**Chapter End**

Chapter Notes: References to Flash Gordon, Beetleguice, Time Bandits, and Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs: these artistic properties are not mine if you happen to see where I slipped them in.

**Reviewers:**

**Jokulhaup –** I'm sure lots of readers used the warning and skipped down... _NOT_. For triple coverage, Usagi also has two Mommies if you count both Ikuko and Serenity the First.

**Fire From Above –** I never planned on a buttload of political movement, but it does seem the next level up for our future empire builders. I didn't up gun Voldemort in the story (my biggest personal rule is 'don't make Voldie more powerful than he already is') so the Crystal Couple are setting their sights higher.

**Adam Durlock –** Maybe after the Shit is done hitting the Fan in one or two chapters I can spend time showing Ranma's softer side and how he helps pick up the pieces. I didn't plan on showing the Ranma/Happy fight BUT there will be a Last Man Breathing type of ki-master beat down next chapter. Oh yes... Shit **will** meet Fan next time.

**deitarion/SSokolow – **Fear not, I'm sure I can leave a problem or two for you to find. I still don't claim to be a professional writer... creative and unique perhaps but not professional. On a shockingly related note, I now have in my personal library a book on WWII that is poorly edited. WTF, I paid for that?

**WhiteElfElder –** At this point, I think Narcissa would suck off a house elf if that got her free of the Dark Lord's clutches. As for the Black Lordship, Chapter Twelve of the Girl Who Loved outlines how Sirius could not make Harry the next Lord Black BUT he could give Harry all of the Black family money and stuff. Malfoy was Lord Black, though it didn't do him any good. Narcissa is now the Lady of the family, but still she get's the title and nothing else save a Wizengamot vote.

**Wonderbee31 – **Narcissa definitely needs a hero. If Mrs. Riddle tried to make a run for it, that would really piss off her husband, wouldn't it? Hmmmmmm.

**nxkris –** I see Pluto's character as iceberg-like. Most people see only the barest tip of her and those that learn too much about her rarely live through the encounter. Somehow she is still a good (not-evil) character in spite of this.

**Firehedgehog –** Ding-dong the wizard's dead! For Black inheritance issues, check out what I said to WhiteElfElder above.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** Thank you.

**Jimm –** Thanks for reviewing.

**ChronoBlade –** I didn't write that one scene just because of your review. Honestly. It just happened.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** I honestly didn't know Usagi was going to fall apart in the interview until I tried to see things from her perspective. She's putting loved ones in danger even if it is for the good of the world... she was lying to her family... she had a secret life... I imagine that is heavy shit to a young girl and especially a Japanese one.

**Essex –** There is no Sailor Moon. There is no Ranma... no Harry Potter. There is no spoon. You think that's air your breathing, Neo? Now I'll have to wait for more reviews to see if my review-only Matrix crossover worked or not.

**mmoondragon –** I am steadfast in keeping these two girls straight. Is that why the temptation of making them turn sapphic seems so appealing?


	11. Shit Meet Fan

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Eleven: Shit Meet Fan**

**Part One: Red and Blondie's Excellent Adventure**

December 24rd , 1996

"_Oh... my... God..."_

Usagi stared into Harry's deep blue eyes. Well, she was sort of looking into her own eyes as Harry was 'going girl', but that wasn't the point. Harry had just shared something from her own past that Usagi couldn't possibly have ever understood by words alone.

It started simple enough. Given a few minutes in the early morning hours before they expected any interruptions, the two lovers chose to do something intensely personal. They began trading memories. First came Harry's 'Heather Snape' memories; Usagi would need them eventually in order to avoid paradox as Harry well knew. Next, Usagi offered to 'pay' for Harry's memories with one or two of her own. In exchange for time spent as Heather, Harry got some of Usagi's time spent as Sailor Moon. Harry could have done without knowing what a mid-battle Tuxedo Mask kiss felt like though.

Usagi was the first to give Harry something deep. She knew Harry had crappy childhood... hadn't received any Christmas or birthday presents of note until Hagrid surprised Harry on his eleventh birthday... she wanted to give him one of those missing childhood memories. Harry was floored when she suddenly remembered a six year old Usagi's family Christmas celebration. The happiness, the presents, the love of a Mommy and Daddy and little brother are the very things Harry never had. Harry finally remembered a real loving family Christmas even if it wasn't hers.

Harry felt the need to reciprocate. Not with a powerful loving memory as she still had precious few of those that didn't already involve Usagi, but with something that defined Harry Potter. Something dark. Harry gave Usagi a memory of the cupboard under the stairs.

Tears began to fall down one blonde's cheeks as her twin stared at her stoically. Harry learned to hide her tears and subdue the pain of the cupboard long before Hagrid broke down a door with a cake in his pocket.

"_But you were just a little boy! How could they do that?"_

The two emotional teens may have just broken their sex-every-morning pattern for the first time, but they got something much deeper than physical pleasure out of today's early morning hours. Understanding.

Harry understood now how Usagi felt to defend a city from evil- to have a demon squeezing you by the neck until a new ally you never met before saves you with magic she's never used before. That's thin ice, mate. Usagi understood Harry's near obsessive-compulsive desire to act in defense of those in need. He was doing for others what none were willing or able to do for him. That's loads different from a talking cat invoking Destiny on a flighty girl with a big heart.

"Yeah. That was no fun at all."

Usagi nodded vigorously while wiping tear tracks off of her cheeks with the back of her hand.

Harry looked over to her Bunny. So much pain showed in Usagi's eyes that Harry felt it necessary to provide her with a different focus. Still, there were few memories he could think of that were powerful enough to compete with the dark solitude of the cupboard and they were all dark or dangerous to varying degrees. The only good alternative was something that focused on their personal family bonds, their love and what would come of it.

"Why don't I give you one more memory, Love?"

Usagi nodded again. To be honest, she'd like something other than the cupboard to think about this holiday. Harry concentrated, eyelids dropping over a pair of crystal blue orbs for a moment as a polished wooden shaft came up to her temple. Soon afterwards, she drew a long strand of memory out and moved it over to Usagi's temple.

"Ready?"

More nodding. Usagi mentally prepared herself by believing that the memory on Harry's wand was already hers... she just needed to get it back.

Harry gave Usagi the memory.

If the Moon Princess had been drinking anything at all, she would have just spit it out.

"Really?"

It was Harry's turn to nod.

The memory started with Harry and a dead Usagi talking awkwardly during their first sort-of-date. Ghost-Usagi asked Harry's opinion on something happening off to the side. There was Cuteness and she looked unhappy about being cornered by Rei. Without warning, the pane of glass behind Cuteness simply vanished.

Usagi's mind almost shut down experiencing Tokyo Tower from Harry's perspective. After avoiding those memories for months 'living' as a ghost at Hogwarts Castle, realizing how close her daughter and soon to be husband both came to being stains on the concrete below Tokyo Tower was horrifying in a way the cupboard under the stairs never could be.

Without words, Usagi reached over and hugged Harry tightly. There would be few words between them until they met up with others for breakfast but the two would not stray further than arm's reach from each other for hours.

* * *

"…_at noon today, for the first time ever TV Tokyo will run a special report on mahou shoujo. Last night, our very own Tendo Nabiki sat down in front of cameras with several of the famous yet elusive Senshi… …rumor has it that the interview will reveal the identity of one Senshi and provide details of an upcoming magical girl wedding. In other news, the Dow Jones fell sharply yesterday amidst heavy trading…"_

Breakfast at the Tendo home's dining room was unusually quiet this morning. Aside from the television spouting off in the background, all of the old house's seasonal guests were busy either eating or reading the morning paper while eating. Cuteness had somehow found her way over and was having breakfast with her parents. With a happy family, a happy couple and two single (yet still happy) witches at the table, Christmas Eve was starting just as it should; full of promise.

"Good morning!" A voice called out from the entry foyer.

"Good Morning, Setsuna!" Usagi called back, pleasantly surprised. Hotness wasn't known for announcing her presence. Maybe the holiday season was getting to her. _"Would you like some breakfast?"_

The green haired beauty stepped into the room and gave her Princess a warm smile.

"_Thank you for the offer, Your Highness-"_ Usagi stuck her tongue out at the honorific, _"but I've already eaten. I was wondering if I could borrow Mister Potter and Mister Saotome for a few hours this morning… We'll be back in plenty of time to see how well Nabiki's done with last night's little get together. I promise."_

Hermione may not have had a stake in the request, but she did find it amusing to watch the two young men in question cast the same questioning glance at their significant others. Cuteness pouted, but she wasn't upset enough to make a scene about losing Daddy time. Luna was too preoccupied to pay attention. With chopsticks holding her hair in a tight bun, she was using her wand to levitate bite sized portions of rice into her mouth.

"_I don't mind."_ Usagi looked over to the girl who transfigured her classic place setting into colorful plastic dishes with an Akazukin ChaCha theme. _"Hermione's first look at Japan the other day was fun, but I bet we'll be talking about Luna's morning for years to come."_

Usagi and Shampoo grinned at each other. Showing Hermione around Tokyo _was_ fun but the quirky Ravenclaw promised to be so much more entertaining. Luna may have followed her father on a few expeditions into continental Europe but those trips were to sparsely populated magical habitats. The Asian non-magical world should be completely alien to her.

Harry and Ranma joined Setsuna on the front walk after finishing up breakfast and kissing their girls goodbye.

"_We have a few stops to make, gentlemen, but first… may I ask what you are getting Usagi and Shampoo for Christmas?" _

Harry and Ranma looked at each other. She wouldn't tell the girls early, so what was this about? Both young men agreed hesitantly.

Harry lead off. _"One of the Potter family heirlooms I got back from the Headmaster is a tiara. I'm not sure if it's Goblin made like the Sword of Gryffindor but it's quite stunning and it almost glows with protective enchantments. Both pretty and useful… It's perfect." _

"_I earned more money in our trip to England that Shampoo realizes."_ Ranma took up the torch_. "As quick as shit happens around me, I figured it was finally time I got us some cell phones. Also got a headache reading over the damn international service plan I signed, but it'll be worth it."_

"_Not bad."_ Hotness… or rather _Sailor_ Hotness as she transformed while the boys were replying… didn't seem very impressed_. "But I think I may have something to add, something that both Shampoo and the Princess would like to get soon even if they won't say so out loud."_

"_Go on…"_ Harry suspected this was one of those Girl Things. Something that even a normal guy in a normal relationship may not get immediately either.

"_While it's true that Shampoo grew up in a closed and unusual society, she's been out in the world long enough to want some of the same things that more modern girls like Usagi want. Things like…"_ At this point, Pluto held up her left hand and pointed to her bare left ring finger.

"Oh. Ohhhhhhhh." Harry and Ranma both went silent and just stared at Pluto's hand.

Pluto enjoyed watching mental gears grind to a halt. She resolved to try for this reaction more often.

"_Of course, you don't have to go, but I know a nice little place where the jewelry selection is out of this world."_

"_No. I mean, sure I'll… I'll go. I don't know what I can afford, b-but me 'n' Shampoo are kinda headin' that way, aren't we?" _Ranma set his path and Harry nodded next to him.

"_Might as well. We're already engaged, so you could say Usagi's overdue for a ring, yeah?" _ Harry mentally cursed himself for not thinking of it sooner.

"_Very good."_ Pluto summoned her Garnet Rod. _"Where we're going isn't accessible by train… so if you two wouldn't mind grabbing the Garnet Rod, we will be going the easy way this time."_

The wizard and the ki-master both put their hands on Pluto's staff. Soon the Tendo front yard blinked out of existence. For a brief moment, the boys both thought they could see the barest hint of an imposing gate in the colorless grey mists of wherever they where before their location blinked out of existence again to be replaced by something else.

"_And here we are."_

Both boys released the Garnet rod and looked around.

"_Where the bloody hell are we?" _

"_Language, Harry. Must I take Hermione's place as your minder when she's not around?" _

Ranma chuckled at Harry's light scolding looked around. The three of them were in a stale smelling, poorly lit chamber with a lot of massive, vault like doors around most of the perimeter. A light coating of dust covered everything except a few sets of footprints which looked to be a match for Pluto's boots.

"_So where the fuck are we, anyway."_

"_Ranma." _Pluto pinched the bridge of her nose. Apparently taking both of these children out shopping was going to be quite the chore.

"_What? Shampoo likes it when I talk dirty to her. Excuse us for not being high society types."_

Harry chuckled in the background.

There were a lot of reasons Pluto didn't like dealing with Jusenkyo cursed individuals. The chaos began with their innate ability to alter time and space in ways the Gate couldn't track. Being unable to predict Jusenkyo victims meant that she had to rely on her vast experience dealing with those younger than her. Luckily for both young men, Pluto could tell that they were good souls with noble intentions; otherwise she would have snuffed out the both of them the moment she knew they existed.

"_This, gentlemen, is Reserve Vault Three of the once great Lunar Imperial City, now known as the Sea of Serenity"_ Pluto swept her hands to the side as if she were presenting a showcase on The Price is Right.

"_What?"_ One small word for man, one giant denial for mankind.

"_The Moon. You. Are. On. It."_

"_Well you don't have to be so snarky about it."_ Harry looked around the room with renewed interest. _"It doesn't look all that moon-like to me."_

Ranma hopped up and down on the balls of his feet. Gravity didn't feel any different… but then Setsuna may just say 'magic did it' and she was already looking a bit on the rag. Best not to push her too far.

"_If you want to see N.A.S.A.'s discarded trash and a flag in the dirt, go outside."_ Pluto walked over to one of the vault doors and began to inspect the ancient script which decorated each surface_. "You might want to change into Sailor Moon first. She can survive on the Lunar surface for a little while. Harry Potter can't nor can Saotome Ranma… and no, the bubble head charm won't keep you from exploding."_

Harry and Ranma looked at each other for a moment before Harry spoke up again. "We'll stay down here, thank you."

Pluto moved from one vault to the one next to it and inspected the writing to either side again.

"_This is the one we want."_ Pluto turned back to the boys. _"Any ideas on how to open it?"_

"_Wait. You can't open the vault?" _

"_If I could open the vault without help, then I wouldn't have brought you two along. I can't Dead Scream the_ _door as it's hardened against most magics. I can't bring in a big gun or explosives without risking a_ _cave in that kills us and destroys the vault contents. While security's automated command routines would recognize Sailor Moon if it were up and running, turning the power back on is not a one person job. We'd need magically trained engineers for that, and as you may have noticed, we don't have any on staff right now. Why don't you two earn the girls' rings by figuring out how to open the vault doors for me."_

"_I could try to apparate to the other side…" _Harry's brows were furrowed in concentration.

"_Magically hardened. I can't teleport in. I don't recommend you trying."_

"_Breaking Point Technique?" _

"_I don't know. Please warn us before you try anything that might involve explosions and shrapnel. We do want to make it back to Earth alive."_

"_Transfiguration then?"_

"_You can try. Why don't you try on one of the other doors first."_ Pluto ended her statement by pointing to some vault doors on the other side of the room.

"_How long do we have before we go back, then Pluto?" _Harry through the question out over his shoulder as he approached a door and drew both of his wands out.

"_Time and space, Harry dear. I can take us back right before lunch no matter how long this takes." _ Ah, Sailor Hotness. Harry almost thought of her as a human for the briefest of moments after she admitted that there was something she couldn't do for them. Wait a minute…

"_Can't you just pop into the future and watch whatever it is we do that works?"_

"_Watching one Jusenkyo cursed individual through The Gate is hard enough… watching two in the same room is like trying to watch scrambled pay-per-view porn on television. You might see part of something for a half second, but it's meaningless without the rest of the picture. What we're doing right now is a good example. I know that you two are capable of figuring out how to open these vaults but I don't know how or even if you will be successful when you try. The chaos flowing off of the two of you is most troublesome to me."_

"_Sorry about that."_ And he was. Harry really respected Sailor Pluto and all that she did for him and Usagi.

"_Don't worry, Harry. As long as Usagi's daughter calls you Daddy, I promise not to kill you for the good of the future." _Harry and Ranma looked at each other. Did she just... could she really... but... nahhh. Must be a joke.

Right?

Half an hour later, Ranma's and Harry's tests were still coming up dry. These doors couldn't be charmed, melted, transfigured, cursed or otherwise physically forced open. They bled off heat as quickly as the boys could pump it in and thawed out as quickly as Harry and Ranma could freeze them.

"Well?" Ranma saw Harry sit on the floor and take a breather.

"Pluto wasn't joking when she said 'magic hardened'. Nothing I can do even scratches the surface and either Dobby can't hear my call or the Moon's just too far for a house elf to pop to. What about you, Red?"

And Red she was. The heat tests were making the whole room a little toasty for a while, so the boys took a quick cold shower via Aguamenti just to cool off some.

"I can't find the breaking point on any of these doors, Blondie. I can pump a lot of ki into them, but it bleeds away before I can reach any kind of critical level for melting or cracking." It was official. They just don't make vault doors like they used to.

Harry was stumped. They needed some magical trump card, something that completely overpowered anything that they... and a mahou shoujo with the CV of a goddess... could throw at the most powerful bank vaults in solar orbit. A magical trump card. Wait a minute...

"Ranma. You said that the doors will hold ki, right?" Harry seemed to have perked up a bit and the other two in the room noticed.

Ranma nodded. Harry smiled.

"Pluto. We need to get some Jusenkyo cursed water up here. Or- or failing that, we need a few instant curse packets."

Now Ranma was smiling too. The world must be about to end because Sailor Pluto was the only one in the room that didn't understand what Harry was planning.

Harry looked at the green haired Senshi. "Didn't I tell you about Rock Girl?"

If they did, Pluto must have forgotten that particular tidbit, but it didn't take long for Harry and Ranma to summarize their earliest joint research on the effects of Jusenkyo on transfigured and ki charged objects. Why? Because Jusenkyo magic is clearly more powerful than normal transfiguration and it works on ki infused inanimate objects.

After letting the idea settle for a moment, Sailor Hotness spoke up. "Everyone who wants to take a quick side trip to Jusenkyo valley, please raise your hand."

They were three for three, not that any dissent was expected.

Sixty seconds later (but also a week ago because Pluto didn't want to miss anything important in the present) three people of varying exposure to magic appeared in the middle of Kashmir.

* * *

At the Hikawa Shrine in Azabu-Juuban, Hino Rei quietly slid open a rice paper door and moved to sit down next to her grandfather. The old head priest was kneeling before the Sacred Fire and reciting a string of prayers to his ancestors so Rei chose to say a few prayers of her own rather than interrupt.

Eventually, the aging priest chose to reward his miko's respectful attitude by speaking up first.

"_Rei, my dear. How may this worn out old man help you this fine winter morning?"_

Choosing to be formal and polite for extra ass kissieness, Rei bowed low to show respect.

"_Honorable Grandfather. One of my close friends wishes to arrange for her wedding ceremony to take place here at Hikawa shrine this summer."_

The old man smiled. He always liked dealing with Rei's friends. They were attractive young girls whom he could tell were _special_ just like his Rei was. _"Have I met this girl before?" _

"_Many times, Gandfather. It is Tsukino Usagi, the blonde who disappeared a year ago."_

"_I remember her. So she has returned then?"_

Rei shifted in discomfort. _"Yes, Grandfather."_

"_Your Princess is back from the dead, it seems."_

Rei was too shocked to fidget. _ "Ye-yes, Grandfather."_

"_How wonderful. Bring Miss Tsukino and her husband-to-be here so that I can show her my appreciation for all that she and her followers have done for me, my granddaughter, my shrine and my country. We have a wedding ceremony to plan."_

"_Thank you, Grandfather." _Rei bowed once more to the priest.

"_I am honored to have you as my granddaughter. Your mother would be so proud of you were she still alive, as would your father if he could j__ust remove his head from his ass long enough to remember that he has a daughter."_

"_Thank you, Grandfather."_

_

* * *

_

"_Wow. Those are some damn big mountains."_ Ranma and her (his at the time) father had done a lot of traveling when she was a young boy, but they never got quite this far west. Reminiscing about her upbringing and ogling the stupendously large mountains not far away were both helping her ignore the frigid winter conditions.

"_Welcome to the Hymalayas, Ranma. To the east is Tibet, China's Quinghai province and Jusenkyo Valley."_

Harry looked around after piling on every warming charm she knew. Even with all of the extra snow, she knew she'd been here before.

"This is where we first met, isn't it Pluto?" The Senshi smiled and nodded.

"Indeed Mister Potter, it is."

"But why... wait. You can't get any closer to Jusenkyo than this, right?"

"Not by my teleportation powers, no. I could walk, but I rarely have a reason strong enough to get so close to the Pools of Sorrow. There is a Lunar transport gate in Phoenix Mountain, but it hasn't been open for use since the Great Fall."

"So the Phoenix Tribe girl got it right?"

"For the most part, yes."

"Then we should invite their king to my wedding. He's related to Usagi by way of the Lunar family tree, right?" Pluto nodded in answer to Harry. "Right... now. I suppose if we hold hands, I can take us to the guide's hut and we can buy a few packets off of him and be done with it."

"I'd rather not, Harry. It is dangerous to travel within a stone's throw of the pools or have you forgotten last time you went there?" Pluto was NOT getting within sight of those damn pools. No. No. No.

"We can get some from Nyucheizu, the Joketsuzoku village. I've been there a few times now." Ranma offered.

Harry looked to Pluto who nodded firmly. Harry looked back to Ranma.

"Can you concentrate on a spot in the village I can apparate us to? Some place where we will be out of the way enough not to immediately die from sharp, pointy things?"

Ranma laughed and nodded. Harry drew her wand.

Thirty seconds later, a small -pop- went unanswered in the center of the Nyucheizu village tournament field. Ranma separated from her traveling companions and mounted the challenge log.

"_GRAAAAAAAAANNYYYYYYYYYY! WHERE ARE YOU, YOU OLD BA _**-BONK-**_"_ Ranma's ki charged voice was muffled as a wooden cane cracked over her skull. _ "OW! Watch it with that thing you hag! _**-BONK- **_Ow!"_

"_Such horrible manners, today's youth have no respect for the elderly." _

Harry and Pluto watched in amusement as Elder Cologne hopped around on her staff and welcomed Ranma back to her village. A lot of bonking and foul language was involved. Soon enough, Elder Cologne judged Ranma to be suitably teased and offered to host the village's three surprise guests in her home.

"_So you say you need some packets of instant curse powder? Very well. I have several curses in stock for the three of you to choose from." _ Cologne took a sip from her hot cider. _"May I ask why you have come to my humble home in the middle of winter… without Shampoo?"_

Both young ladies were curiously silent. Sailor Pluto chose to reply as to keep Harry and Ranma from stumbling over the explanation.

"_Honored Elder. We are on a quest to retrieve two very important artifacts from a secret vault which has been unopened since the Pools of Sorrow were formed. One of these artifacts will be presented by Ranma as a gift to Shampoo this Christmas."_ Pluto took a sip from her own cider. _"A ring, to be specific."_

"_A ring you say?"_ Cologne eyed Ranma, who blushed and avoided the tribal matriarch's gaze_. "My how time flies. Why, it seems like only yesterday that this young man was denying my great-granddaughter one minute and then using her for a free meal the next."_

Ranma's blush turned several shades darker_. "It ain't like that anymore, Granny. I'm… I'm gonna ask Shampoo to marry me. She deserves better after all the crap I put her through but I think she'll say yes anyway and- and there won't be any Tendos or Kuonjis or Kunos or Hibikis around to mess things up when I ask her."_

"_Thank you Ranma. She will say yes and you __**will**__ make her very, very happy… or I will kill you myself." _ Elder Cologne delivered her death threat with more warmth than Harry or Pluto had ever seen a death threat delivered with before.

"_Better than you have tried, Great-grandmother."_

"_True enough, Son-in-law. True enough."_

Cologne gave them a small selection of curse packets as well as a supply of fresh water. After the explanation of why they wanted curse powder in the first place, the elder suggested that they use real non-magical water so as not to cross too many magics. Harry thanked her for such sound advice.

Cologne demanded that she be informed as soon as Shampoo set a date even if that date was 'right fucking now'. Ranma and Harry both received Elder Cologne's blessing along with a promise that the Joketsuzoku would come to Harry and Usagi's wedding with much pageantry and gifts to offer the happy couple. She also offered to help security for the wedding; an offer Harry and Pluto were very happy to accept. With the threat of dark wizards crashing the party, ki adept security personnel would be highly valued.

After a short stay, the questing trio of ki-mistress, Senshi and witch made their excuses and left Jusenkyo Valley. Once they were safely deposited in Kashmir by Harry's apparition, Pluto took the wheel again and shot the trio back into Reserve Vault Three a week forward in time to the present.

"Right. Let's get this over with."

Harry, Ranma and Pluto gathered around one of the doors Harry failed to breach earlier in the day. The young witch started off their next test by transfiguring a row of cups. No sense using too much water in one go, right?

As Harry poured some water into a cup, Ranma began to channel raw ki into the door. Pluto tore open a packet of curse powder and poured it into the water.

"Drum roll please…"

Harry walked up to the vault door with a cup of instant curse water. As soon as she saw both Pluto and Ranma standing well clear of the door to either side, she decided to copy their actions and stepped to the side of the door jamb.

Unable to stand the tension any longer, Harry tossed the curse water at the door.

"Quack!"

For the briefest of moments, three Lunar explorers saw a white duck standing on the floor where a vault door used to be… until a two meter high wall of gold coins lost support and began to spill out of the vault. Mr. Duck died under an avalanche of Silver Millennium currency. Under the swiftly moving river of gold, no one noticed the door snap back into existence after losing its ki via death.

"Brilliant!" Harry briefly wondered if this was the kind of thing Bill Weasley did every day as a cursebreaker for Gringotts.

Pluto stepped up to the pile of twelve millennia old coins and picked one up.

"Usagi doesn't owe me five hundred yen anymore, Harry. I've got it right here. Can you two pick up some of this? Our plans for the wedding and for the war in England will be easier to fund if we deposit this in a real bank in Japan. All of Harry's money is tied up in the Wizarding World and I can see no reason to change that in the near future"

"Duly noted."

After watching Pluto take one coin and drop it into her cleavage, Harry and Ranma both began to grab at the pile. As one was experienced in ki folding and the other knew transfiguration and shrinking charms, the two cursed girls were able to squirrel away quite a lot of gold. The pile that spilled out of the vault still looked as big as ever no matter how much they took.

"Okay, ladies." Pluto ignored the impolite replies and pointed to another door on the far wall. "That one."

* * *

"_Daddy!"_

A pink haired missile hit Harry amidships causing her to tumble to the floor.

"_Where have you been, Daddy? Did you get me anything? I missed you did you miss me Momma missed you too and'-_ (big breath in) _-and we went shopping and got you presents and now I knowwhatyou'regonnagetforChristmas-_ (big breath in) _-and I wrapped your presentfromMommaandeverything!" _ Cuteness pulled off of her Daddy. _"Hey, you stink! What were you doing with Auntie Red and Puu anyway?"_

A successful vault cracking trio came back to the Tendo home only to find that the living room was packed with Tsukinos, Senshi, and Harry's and Usagi's close friends in Tokyo. If anyone noticed Cuteness calling Ranma 'Auntie Red', they didn't take it seriously or were too interested what could have gotten the 'girls' to work up a sweaty funk with Sailor Hotness during a private morning tryst.

"_Nothing much happened, Small Lady. I took the boys to a dark, quiet, out of the way place where no one can hear you scream and ran them ragged for a few hours-" _

POP

Pluto's racy joke was interrupted by a hysterical house elf. "OH PROFESSOR LORD HARRY POTTER SIR! DOBBY IS BEING VERY SORRY FOR NOT BEING GOING TO YOU WHEN YOU IS CALLING! Dobby is not knowing where it is you is going, Harry Potter, Sir! Dobby is a horrible elf! Dobby will crush hands in oven door likes Dobby did at wicked Malfoy home, yes he will!"

Hermione took one look at the little elf latched onto Harry's leg and went righteous.

"Harry James Potter! What have you done to that poor elf?"

Harry looked panicky when she turned her gaze down to Dobby.

"Whatever it was, I'm sorry! Really! Please don't go punishing yourself for whatever it is you think you did!" Harry looked down at her shaking leg elf and asked, "Dobby? Dobby! I'm sorry I called you when I did, but I didn't know if you'd hear me or not from that far away."

"Well how far away were you, Harry? Dobby's crossed the Earth at least once that I know of."

Nobody else interfered with this little scene between elf, master and best friend. Usagi wasn't the only one wishing for some pop corn and movie snacks. She was paying attention to the play between Hermione and Harry more than the others though. Hermione clearly knew how to put Harry in his place and that was something Usagi needed to learn. Did Hermione offer lessons in Care of Magical Harrys?

"We weren't on Earth, 'Mione."

Silence.

Sailor Pluto flash changed into normal daily attire and spoke up. "I took Harry and Ranma with me to make a withdrawal from one of Usagi's lunar vaults. Her old piggy bank is much bigger than her new one." Setsuna looked at the 'boys'. "Blondie? Red? If you would please?"

Setsuna waved her hand in a gesture towards an empty section of tatami mats off to one side of the room everyone had congregated in. Blondie and Red looked at each other and nodded. Soon a small mountain of gold began to form on the floor as streams of coins and small treasure chests flew out of thin air. Hermione hadn't seen a gold shower since the Quidditch World Cup and none of the locals had ever seen anything remotely similar.

Kenji may have seen something similar once... yen notes and strippers came to mind... but this was a whole new level of 'making it rain'.

"_That's... that's my daughter's money from the Silver Millennium?" _Ikuko's eyes were trapped by the shine of thousands of highly polished gold coins.

"_That's about forty thousand crowns... Lunar crowns, of course, not British."_ Setsuna knelt down and collected a few of the coins from the floor. _"This is only a small portion of your daughter's money. We didn't even scratch the surface of the vault these came from and there were a dozen similar vaults in the same reserve complex."_

Setsuna began to pass the coins around so that everyone could see the smooth flowing alien script and floral patterns which adorned both sides of each coin. More silence from the crowd.

"_That pile of coins should be worth two hundred and fifteen million yen or one point three million pounds in today's gold market. Sold individually as the currency of a forgotten interplanetary civilization, every single one is priceless on it's own. Then again, we didn't even scratch the surface of Reserve Vault Three."_

"_Please stop describing how unbelievably rich my daughter is, Miss Meiou. Any more detail and I'm going to faint."_

Ikuko sat down to calm her mind, her daughter and granddaughter sitting to either side in a show of offering comfort. Well... Cuteness was sitting to offer her grandmother comfort while Usagi was about as in need of comfort as her mother. It was one thing to be told you are rich. It was another thing to see it.

Usagi and her mother were both thankfully rescued from their 'holy shit... rich!' thought circles when Setsuna turned up the television volume.

"_...and not one frame of the interview you are about to see has been edited by special effects artists in any way. With me today is local events reporter, Tendo Nabiki, who was personally contacted by the Senshi for the express purpose of hosting an interview. Miss Tendo?"_

Whether they were watching or not, everyone in the room recognized the voice which spoke up next.

"_Thank you Miss Miho. As you said, I was contacted by Sailor Pluto for the express purpose of interviewing members of the magical community. Why allow an interview now when mahou shoujo and other magical groups have done so much to avoid public scrutiny? You will all hear Sailor Moon explain why in her words in only a few minutes... but first a proper history of our mahou shoujo and of magical communities the world over is necessary before Moon's explanation can be clearly understood."_

What came next was a recap of what was said in the dojo interview plus a few comments from Nabiki added to smooth out context. To the surprise of many and the consternation of one pink haired little girl, several side issues were introduced with Cuteness, the park loving witch-Senshi also known as Kiki and Chibi-Moon.

While Pluto didn't react during the Little Kiki side notes, Usagi gave her daughter little disapproving looks. Cuteness huffed in response. Stones and glass houses, Momma.

"_...and several early copies of this interview were provided to members of the Diet and the Imperial Family. Miss Tsukino and Lord Potter, if you are watching, I would like to extend an invitation by Emperor Akihito and Prime Minister Murayama for you to speak with the Imperial family and members of the Diet as well as the English Ambassador to Japan. They are willing to meet the two of you plus two guests at your convenience during this holiday season."_

"_I- um..." _Usagi started, not quite sure how to respond to an imperial summons.

"_Your Highness."_ Setsuna spoke up. _ "Might I suggest Friday, the third of January? That day will not likely interfere with existing holiday plans and still comes before the return trip to Hogwarts Castle for Harry."_

"_You mean the return trip to Hogwarts for both of us... I will not abandon Harry now that my heart beats again."_

Both of Usagi's parents took issue with her desire to go to England at the end of Christmas break but neither adult felt like challenging their daughter while all of her magical friends were around to support her. Daughter or not, their little Bunny had truly fallen down the rabbit hole in a way that no common remedy could negate.

"_Two guests... who do we take?" _ Usagi called out randomly.

"_You should take Setsuna,"_ Rei suggested, _"she is better at these diplomatic things."_

"_Might I suggest Ami, Your Highness? She is the Senshi who came to your aid first in this life." _ Setsuna's counter went further than Rei considered. _"Hermione would also be a good choice. She is as close to Harry as Ami is to you, if not closer, and helps emphasize our dedication to international cooperation."_

Over the next hour, many suggestions were provided. Interestingly, every person who was 'nominated' found a reason why another should have the honor of accompanying their Princess to meet the Emperor of Japan. Usagi resorted to holding the final decision until later due to lack of time to decide.

The next few hours were spent in a festive holiday mood. Harry explained quidditch to Shingo and Kenji. Luna taught Hermione how to charm the patterns on wrapping paper to move. Usagi gossiped with her friends to get caught up on what she missed. Studying for their final exams already? Looking over college applications? Usagi had to be assured repeatedly that none of them would 'leave her' after the summer. To help prove the point, Rei gave Usagi a Christmas snog in front of the other girls. Cuteness was having a gold coin war with Hotaru and Luna at the time and didn't see her Mommy kissing another girl... not that she hasn't caught Haruka and Michiru doing as much or more on occasion.

Eventually, Setsuna called a halt to some of the festivities.

"_Your Highness, Lord Potter... you should get ready for the Ministry's Yule Ball."_

"_Will you be going with us?"_ Usagi glanced over the faces of her Senshi as they listened in.

"_Why don't you take Mercury, Venus, Mars and Jupiter with you? The rest of us can help Small Lady watch for Santa." _Several people in the room smiled at Pluto's comment. One little girl bristled.

"_Hey! I know he's not real. Why use flying deer when portkeys and floo powder would work much better?"_

Luna looked offended at Cuteness's comment. She almost caught him last time. Maybe this would be her year to prove that Santa Claus was real...

After half an hour of 'what's taking so long' jokes and other cuts on Harry's needing to get 'all dolled up', the five magical girls all changed in a matter of seconds after saying a few magic words.

"So how do we get there?" Harry was looking for the Garnet Rod, but Setsuna only had a glass of wine in her hands.

"You can take them, Harry. Just tap the crystal I gave you last time before apparating each way. I've already set it to affect your trip. Jupiter has been looking for an excuse to put her hand on your ass all night." There were plenty of giggles but Jupiter didn't deny Setsuna's words. Harry contemplated the small crystalline sort-of-time-turner in his pocket. He pulled it out and tapped it once with his wand.

"_Fine. Come on, ladies. With five of you we're going to need a group hug to get in close enough." _ Harry was soon the center of a six way embrace.

"_Oh, Harry! Is that for me?" _Venus called out.

Oh, damn... something of his was growing and pushing into someone's hip. Having someone grope his backside wasn't helping matters.

"_Who's grabbing my ass? Jupiter? Is that your hand on my ass?"_

"_You bet! Come on, stud. Take us all for a ride. You know you want to."_

Harry knew that he wouldn't be able to get rid of his 'problem' until all of the girls let go, so he focused on the task at hand and pushed other things out of his mind until the trip through space-time was over.

-crack-

* * *

Rufus Scrimgeour was a bundle of nerves in the Ministry's Main Lobby. Harry said he'd be arriving, but the Minister still didn't know how far to trust a teenager, no matter how famous he was. There was a lot of activity in the lobby with all of the guests either flooing or apparating in now that the festivities were about to begin. Rufus also had twenty aurors with him just in case the next guest to show up was Tom Riddle. Hopefully none of the aurors would turn if the Dark Lord did show up. Since he still couldn't be sure of of his pureblood aurors, each heartbeat felt like one thump closer to death to the overworked Minister. 'Just when was that thrice damned boy going to-'

-crack-

Yes! Scrimgeour recognized the legs and skirts of two of those girls. Soon the knot of new arrivals opened up and the Minister rushed over to greet his guests of honor.

"Harry! Your Highness, an honor to see you again, my dear." Rufus came up to the group of Senshi with a big grin on his face. "And you've brought two more of those lovely Senshi I keep hearing so much about!"

Harry smiled after quickly looking through the lobby. All eyes were on Harry and his mahou shoujo companions.

"Hello again, Minister!" Harry bowed politely to Rufus and then turned to present the Senshi. "You've met the Crown Princess, Mercury and Venus, of course... allow me to present the Senshi of Mars and Jupiter."

After getting a translation via Mercury Computer, Mars bowed slightly and Jupiter gave the Minister a wink.

"Excellent, young man, excellent! I am of course very glad to see you all here tonight. Of course, I can't think of anyone other than you, Harry, that could walk in with five young ladies on your arm and make it work!" Rufus moved to shake Harry's hand, but Venus stepped between them.

"I'm terribly sorry, Sir. We don't know where that hand's been. I hope you understand."

"Did ol' Mad-Eye train you girls? Never mind that, why don't we head into the ballroom and mingle, eh?" Rufus turned towards a large open door not far away only to stop abruptly and turn back around. "You don't mind if I make a bit of a speech when introducing the... _Lady Potter_... do you?"

Harry and Usagi looked at each other for a moment. Usagi nodded.

"Just make sure it's properly flattering, Minister." Harry didn't lose his smile, but the request was no joke.

"Of course, Harry. Say, Harry. Have you heard from your Headmaster today? He's known for coming to these balls early rather than late so that he can mingle, but no one's seen hide nor hair of him today."

"No sir. I wouldn't know anything about his plans for today except that he's been doing a lot of things differently this year."

"True, true. Never mind then. I'm sure he'll turn up eventually."

Rufus turned once more and led the group through whispering crowds in the lobby to a large open door. More voices could be heard on the other side along with some slow moving music.

"Sonorus..." Minister Scrimgeour cast the charm upon himself. "Attention Lords, Ladies and guests of the Ministry of Magic! It is my honor as Minister for Magic to introduce the guests of honor for our Yule Ball."

Most of the other voices lowered until only the buzz of low whispers filled the room.

"Legend has it that long before Merlin founded all that's good and proper in these lands, Selene, the Goddess of the Moon bore a daughter, one who was blessed by Circe while still in the cradle. This daughter, who we wizards have named Luna since before the time of Merlin, became the Queen of the Moon and reigned over a great magical kingdom which taught and guided Earthly magic users for countless years. It is said that a terrible war shook Earth and Moon alike and that Luna sacrificed her own immortal life to protect all surviving wizards and witches around the whole Earth… those who went on to found the modern Wizarding World.

"Only a few days ago during the last Hogwarts feast of the term, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity, daughter of the Queen of the Moon, returned to the living world by the efforts of our very own Lord Harry James Potter!"

A polite applause spread through the room. Wizards always like a story where one of their own prevails over nature itself.

"It is my honor, as Minister for Magic, to present the Chosen One and Luna's Daughter: Lord and Lady Potter and their escorts this evening, the Senshi of Mercury, Venus, Mars and Jupiter!"

The applause doubled as Harry and five mahou shoujo stepped into the ballroom.

The next hour wasn't so much a ball as it was a cue for anyone and everyone to approach Lord Potter and his Lady, the Crown Princess of the Moon. Everyone knew '**Crown** Princess' meant that the girl would one day claim the title of Queen, and if she were Harry Potter's wife, then what did that mean for him? Meeting Lord Greengrass half an hour into it made things somewhat more bearable as he was able to demonstrate a few polite dismissals that Harry and Usagi hadn't thought of. The one time a physically imposing man from the Parkinson family ignored his dismissal and eyed Usagi's escort with contempt, Jupiter rose to the challenge and made a mockery of the man in front of a full audience. If he ever wanted to wield his wand again, he would need to get it removed from his throat. Some in the crowd were impressed that Jupiter could humiliate the man without drawing a wand of her own though an equal number thought poorly of her uncivilized muggle display. To them, it was obvious that Mr. Parkinson expected a fair fight from the girl and that Jupiter's response was underhanded and insulting.

Tired of his ball not actually being a ball, Minister Scrimgeour finally took it upon himself to strike up the band and ask for the Lord and Lady Potter to take center stage. Harry never thought he'd be so happy to dance in front of a room full of strangers.

Two songs in, Usagi noticed a small problem.

"_My Harry?"_ She whispered into his ear as the spun through the other dancing couples.

"_Yes, Love?"_

"_My friends are guarding us well, but it must be frustrating to attend a ball and not get to dance..."_

Harry looked over to their guards for the evening. Mars wore the same neutral mask that she came in with. Next to her Jupiter was attentive... when it came to the young men in the room at least. On the other side of the room Mercury seemed to be occupied with readings from her Mercury Computer while Venus was dancing in place.

"_Do you have a plan, Love?" _ Harry asked. His Princess smiled and nodded. _"Then lead the way."_

The next time Harry and Usagi spun by Venus and Mercury, they fell out of their waltz and approached the Senshi.

"_Why Venus, you've come to a ball, but you're not dressed for the occasion!"_

Usagi switched from her Royal gown to the uniform of Sailor Moon and pulled her fellow Senshi into a hug.

"_Allow me to do something about that. Don't worry, Pluto told me how!" _

Venus barely managed a confused grunt before Moon planted a magically charged kiss on her cheek. Eyes wide, Venus shuddered as a magical surge washed over her form. Magical gloves, sandals and ribbons were transformed in a golden cascade into a smooth, elegant ballroom dress who's color matched her hair exactly. The skirt fell in several layers to the floor and covered her well-heeled feet completely. Golden ribbon straps tied into a bow over each shoulder matched a ribbon choker tied into a bow to the rear. A single deep red rose was woven into the yellow-gold ribbon tying her hair into a long tail.

"_Wow, Venus! That dress is so totally you!"_ Sailor Moon stepped to the side and started chatting up Mercury.

"Princess Venus," Harry bowed low before the blushing girl. "May I have the next dance?"

Princess Venus's sparkling smile seemed to light up the room. Hell yes he could have the next dance!

Much to the surprise of the local crowd, Harry sat out the next dance after his run with Venus and helped Jupiter scan the crowd as Crown Princess Serenity pulled the Princess of Mars onto the ballroom floor. Rei was a vision in shades of red; her dress being very similar to Minako's save a more vertical front panel and surprisingly deep cleavage. Before too long, Mercury and Jupiter were also given the Royal treatment by Usagi and pulled onto the dance floor by Lord Potter. Jupiter, who's dress was cut to allow a perfectly toned calf to peek through, had even been so bold as to request a faster beat from the lead musician. Venus began chomping at the bit for a chance to grab Harry and demand the tempo be upped yet again when a cough nearby caught her attention.

"E-excuse me, Miss Venus?" Her head snapped around. "Would you care to dance?"

To her right, Neville Longbottom was blushing deeper than a Weasley. This wasn't the first time the future Lord Longbottom attended a Ministry Yule Ball, but was the first time he felt Gryffindor enough to ask a shockingly beautiful girl to dance with him. Others in the crowd were paying close attention... how much would these 'Senshi' be willing to mix?

"I'd love to... Neville, right? Harry showed us some memories and pointed out all his best friends to us!"

Neville fought hard against his deepening blush and offered the Princess of Venus his hand. Harry thought of him as one of his best friends? This girl noticed him enough to remember his name? Neville felt like a new man as he danced with a golden goddess.

Of course, the night couldn't go so well for so long, could it?

* * *

**INTERMISSION **

**Go Eat Some Ice Cream or Tacos or Something**

**

* * *

**

**Part Two: Tom and Herb-chan's Bogus Journey**

Pansy looked over to her partner of necessity, a seventh year Ravenclaw who was being paid handsomely to help her fix a piece of furniture in a hard to reach room on the seventh floor of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

Thank Morgana the filthy halfblood hadn't asked for any 'special favors' in his payment. As low as Pansy fell socially when Draco was banished to that Nemesis place, she half expected to be a prize for whichever lucky wizard got to finish the job Draco started.

The boy was handsome, sure, and his feet were much larger than Draco's, but his mother wasn't a pureblood and that made all the difference as far as Pansy was concerned.

Luckily her time stuck in this damned secret room was coming to an end.

"And we're done." The boy let out a deep breath. If he were to be completely honest, working with Pansy Parkinson had been the worst part of the deal. Stuck up bitch. "You should be able to go through to the other side now."

Pansy pulled herself up from the sofa she made him transfigure for her an hour ago.

"I'll just try it out then. Don't leave the room until someone comes back through or you won't get paid for this, understand?"

He nodded and bit back a retort, remembering all the galleons he'd be getting if this worked.

Almost as soon as Pansy entered the cabinet, she came back out followed by a cloaked figure.

"Now you can leave. You'll get your payment so-" _-snap-_

Pansy couldn't finish that statement. Dead witches can't talk, after all.

The Ravenclaw wizard desperately reached for his wand as the hand responsible for snapping Pansy's neck released her and pointed in his direction. He was almost ready to cast a blasting curse at Pansy's killer when his world flared green before fading to black.

Ki-masters don't need to recite incantations to hurl depression tainted glowing death at their victims.

Under the controlling magic of the submission choker, Prince Herb finally had something to be happy about. The wizard who gave Herb orders before sending him through the magical cabinet told him to seek out and kill the School Headmaster... they forgot to say if there was anyone in the castle that Herb couldn't kill. The young prince vowed to take advantage of that loophole by killing absolutely everyone.

Hogwarts Castle shook as Herb blew the door to the Room of Requirement off its hinges.

* * *

The sun was up in Tokyo. It was Christmas morning and Cuteness was poking around a pile of presents beneath the heavily decorated pine tree set up in Setsuna's place.

"_Are Mommy and Daddy back yet? I don't wanna unwrap anything until they can watch."_

"_No, Sweetie. They're not back yet from that ball they went to. Happens a lot with big parties."_

Haruka wasn't worried about Harry and the Princess coming back late. Setsuna would would say something if some shit were about to hit the fan. She always did. Haruka continued to watch from her perch on a couch as the pink haired girl dug deeper into the festively wrapped mountain and smirked. Hotaru was sneaking up on her best friend. Right before the twelve year old girl was in range to commence a tickle attack, her pink haired target tensed.

"I know kung fu." _What?_

Cuteness flowed like water. She fell to the floor in one smooth motion and slipped behind her would be attacker.

"_Saotome School Special Attack! Touch of a Thousand Feathers!" _

Cuteness's hands shot out to either side of Hotaru's waist, little fingers blurring along the larger girl's ribcage.

Hotaru's piercing girlish shriek could have woken any late sleeper on the block.

"_Small Lady!" _ Cuteness turned from the twitching victim of her fearsome prowess to see a worried Setsuna focused on her. _"Since when have you known kung fu?"_

"_I... I've always known the Art. You've watched me practice with Pop and the Old Hag lots of times. Why do you ask?"_

Setsuna bit back a curse and flash changed into Sailor Pluto.

"_Saturn, Neptune, Uranus! Guard Small Lady!" _

Setsuna didn't appear to move, but her attitude changed noticeably. A quick trip to the Time-Space Door, a.k.a. the Gate, will do that.

"_Jusenkyo again! I should just lob a nuke into the valley... I really should!"_

A very pissed off Sailor Pluto disappeared, Garnet Rod in hand. The only thing holding her back from raiding a strategic weapons stockpile was the idea that she might inadvertently create the Spring of Drowned Nuclear Warhead.

Four girls in the room reached for items of power. Cuteness wasn't about to sit idly by and play damsel in distress if she could avoid it. It wasn't part of the Saotome style.

* * *

Ranma may be near impossible to track with the powers available to a guardian of the Gate, but he was fairly predictable when it came to certain things.

High puch. Low kick. Leg sweep. Backhand. Reverse. Block. Again. Again at double speed.

He was currently practicing his Art in the Tendo Dojo with Shampoo. It made him feel comfortable to slip into the routines of daily kata, a calming period preceding his daily violent sparing session with Shampoo.

Sailor Pluto popped into existence in the center of the dojo floor.

"_Ranma! I need you right this instant!"_

Ranma tensed as did Shampoo from the far end of the room.

"_No time to explain! I'll bring him back in one piece, Shampoo. Promise."_

Without further explanation, Pluto reached out and tapped Ranma with her Garnet Rod. Thankfully, Ranma and Shampoo trusted the Senshi of Pluto just enough to allow her that kind of leeway. The Senshi and the ki master both disappeared without another sound.

* * *

Venus was saying farewell to her most recent partner, a tall, dark and handsome young man from Hogwarts, when she felt something pushed into her waist.

"Imperio." The word came out in a whisper, but Venus knew a spell when she heard one.

Her sigil flared. The magic compulsion to ignore her Princess and follow this boy out of the building was flash-fried by a mix of natural and recently augmented defenses which all Senshi enjoy.

"Is that the best you've got, big boy?"

A delicate fist blurred into his face without warning. With a brief surge of Venus Power, her Senshi fuku replaced the killer ball gown she had been wearing for the past hour or so.

Seeing the unexpected transformation, Mars and Usagi both flash transformed from their Princess forms to Sailor Mars and Sailor Moon.

"Avada Keda-"

"Expulso!"

Harry's hex tore into the shoulder of a wizard standing several paces behind Sailor Mars. The man fell screaming as he clutched the shredded flesh outlining where his shoulder blade used to be.

"Aurors to the front!" Cried Minister Scimgeour.

Several aurors in and out of uniform backed up by a handful of regular DMLE officials stepped out of the crowd of party-goers intent on maintaining order. Seconds later, the main entry door to the Ministry Ballroom began to glow green and melt in place. Soon, a hole appeared in the door big enough to allow two people entry at a time.

Dark cloaked forms slipped through the smoking hole two at a time. After twelve pairs of these figures stepped through and stood to either side in a line, the most important uninvited guests appeared. Mister and Misses Riddle entered arm in arm wearing the finest dress robes pureblood family gold can buy.

Aurors began to step back in fear.

Senshi began to step forward.

"Hey, Tom! You're late. Perhaps you'd like to try the punch tonight... I hear the alcohol content goes up every hour like clockwork."

Harry was feeling confident. He had two wands in hand, a broom on his person and he was flanked by magical girls who saved the world in their spare time. Sailor Moon was standing by his side, Scepter of Prissiness in hand. Maybe he would wake up in a hospital tomorrow but by God he was kicking Tom's ass first.

Lord Voldemort dropped Narcissa's arm and drew his wand.

"Harry Potter. I don't see Dumbledore here, boy. When you're broken and bleeding on the floor, who will save you?" Voldemort glanced up and down the line of people who now stood between the general audience and his own Death Eaters. "A handful of cowardly aurors and five foreign whores? Don't be ridiculous, Potter. Put your wand down now and I promise your death will be quick and painless."

Harry didn't let his gaze stray too far from the Dark Lord in front of him. On the plus side, he was not cringing in pain from some sort of mental attack like the last two times he had to face old Snakeface. On the minus side, Dumbledore was missing and this _is_ usually where the old Headmaster would flame in with Fawkes, kindly ask Voldemort to become a better person and then force the Dark Lord to fall back and plan his next move. Harry wanted to take Dumbledore's place in this battle. More to the point, he wanted to go one further and finish things without needing another recover-and-plot phase before the next big battle.

Only one problem.

Harry still wasn't sure which of his talents or gifts was supposed to overcome Tom Riddle's dueling abilities in a head on confrontation like this one.

Tom wasn't willing to wait any longer. Wand tip glowing and ominous rusty yellow, the dark wizard made his move.

"Crucio!"

Less than half a second behind their Master, twenty-five more wands pointed into the crowd and released a barrage of dark magic.

* * *

Saotome Ranma and Sailor Pluto appeared near the darkened front gate of Hogwarts Castle. At least the building was still standing. Soft golden light was twinkling out of nearly every window. A partially obscured full moon cast it's light down to bath the castle in a soft, peaceful glow. Maybe Pluto could still fix things.

_-Booooom-_

A section of the castle wall face blew out several stories up near one of the higher towers. Ranma and Setsuna both made their best personal speed while leaping between deep shadow and narrow roof lines to enter the gaping breach rather than waste time with the main entry doors.

As Pluto followed Ranma through the smoke and debris, they discovered several things. At least one person was already dead. Torn strips from a female professor's robe and a heeled boot were visible at the blast site and both still contained parts of the owner. Several meters down the hall, three young students were cowering in a darkened alcove under the protective wings of an enraged phoenix. Much further down the hall, standing in the middle of a doorway marked by a stone gargoyle, was Albus Dumbledore.

"What do you thin-"

Red light flared around a corner that neither Ranma nor Pluto could see past. Both ki master and Senshi had to shield their eyes as a massive ki ball roared down the other hallway and swallowed Headmaster Dumbledore's shield whole.

_**-BOOOOOM-**_

A deafening roar soon filled the air as more clouds of dust and debris filled the hallway. Hogwarts shook as a good portion of the Headmaster's Tower lost support and fell to the ground below.

Pluto only just noticed when the phoenix spread his wings, slapped the three children with his tail feathers and flame-traveled them out of view. The last phoenix song, a few notes which only just managed to be heard over the destruction beyond, were notes of pain and sorrow.

When the ringing in his ears stopped, Ranma heard a disturbingly familiar laugh float down the corridor. Ranma began to growl, his aura lighting up broken stone and corpse alike.

"_Let there be no mistake, Ranma. If you want Harry to live long enough to marry Usagi then Prince Herb must not leave castle grounds alive." _

Ranma slowly turned to look Pluto in the eyes. She didn't back down. It was the truth; Herb would kill Harry Potter with little effort if the two ever set foot in the same room. The damage to Hogwarts Castle could be repaired and a new headmaster could be found to take Dumbledore's place but the damage to Usagi's heart if she lost Harry would be catastrophic. Without a strong Queen Serenity, no version of Crystal Tokyo or the Crystal Millennium could weather the storm of future conflicts.

Ranma didn't respond to Pluto's warning with words or even a nod. He simply embraced the Umisenken invisibility technique and stalked his prey.

There were two ki masters in Hogwarts Castle and one of them was about to die.

* * *

Harry watched as Tom's curse left the yew and phoenix feather wand in a crooked shaft of light that would be striking him in the chest unless he could escape. Instinctively, he realized that the unforgivable curse was already too close to dodge and he couldn't summon anything to act as a shield fast enough.

Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!

Harry cast a pair of strong banishing charms, one at the Dark Lord and one at Narcissa.

As invisible balls of force and dark magic crossed paths, Harry noticed a new factor slide into view from his left. Sailor Moon had a brilliantly glowing Scepter of Prissiness in her hand and she was bringing it down in an overhead chop.

Dark magic connected with glowing shaft, bounced off, and drove straight into the polished stone floor.

Harry didn't have time to ponder how Sailor Moon could have come up with 'beat it with a stick' as the solution to the Cruciatus Curse. He saw at least half of the other Death Eaters in the room were now lining up curses on him and the girl that just spared him a world of hurt. On the plus side, Narcissa was tossed clean through the entry door before she got a curse off. Even Voldemort appeared shaken after taking Harry's charm without proper shielding.

As Harry and Sailor Moon came under fire, others in the room also reacted to seeing live battle magic. There were some shrieks and cries. Many turned in panic to look for a way out. Many others drew their wands, willing to support the Chosen One openly.

Among the auror ranks, a few actively cursed the Death Eaters standing before them. Many more cast shields or looked for items to transfigure into cover. More than one turned on his fellow aurors to curse them in the back.

Mercury dodged closer to Mars, summoning a frigid mist to blind and bind any Death Eaters in front of her without incantation. Mars held still while drawing back a bow made of flames.

"Mars Flame Sniper!"

Like Harry, Mars was willing to take a curse or three tonight if it meant getting her shot off. The fire arrow sped quickly through a pair of Death Eaters, running them through and setting them aflame.

On the other side of the line, Jupiter leapt straight forward aiming to clothesline two dark wizards at the same time. Venus jumped wide left both to get out of the enemy line of fire and to catch more of them in a narrower field. She pointed her right index finger into the mass of black cloaks and braced her right arm with her left.

"Venus Crescent Beam Shower!"

If the bad guys wanted to give Venus lots of targets, she would do her best to hit every one of them. Some were well shielded from her attack but others were not. Several fell with galleon sized holes passing through their bodies.

From within the ranks of dark wizards, one more call to power drew lightning from the arched ceiling above.

"Supreme Thunder!"

The air became heavy with magic and ozone as lightning cracked and arced out over half a dozen wizards. One inner circle Death Eater was fortunate enough to have come into the battle with the proper protections in place, but that didn't help his cannon fodder allies.

Before the Senshi counter attack truly began, Harry saw a good bit of dark magic heading his way. He knew that Moon was overexposed in front of him and that several of the wands pointed at the two of them were primed with the green of Killing Curses. Still holding both wands, Harry reached forward and pulled his Love off her feet. Summoning as much Lunar power as he could, Harry pushed forward in a leap that took them both past a snarling Dark Lord and through the warped grand entry door.

Voldemort followed his teen nemesis through the gap as behind them a fierce battle raged.

* * *

Herb was enjoying himself.

He savored the feelings of fear and hopelessness rolling off of the young boy he held over the side of a castle parapet. Blood was flowing from the boy's shoulder and tears streamed down his cheeks. The Herb wasn't completely sure what would trigger the submission choker's magic and make him return to the wizard that enslaved him, but he was content to draw out this game as long as he could before that time came. There were still many of these damned witches and wizards hiding from him and he was more than happy to hunt them down one at a time.

What was that smell? Herb lost his smile as the worthless filth dangling from his hand soiled itself in fear. Perhaps it was time that Herb found a female… yes. It was time to ignore the weak males in this castle in favor of more pleasurable forms of revenge.

Herb released his captive and listened as the scream of a dying wizard faded below him. Except… that scream stopped much too soon to have reached the ground some sixty meters below.

He peered over the parapet to see what the boy had caught himself on. Herb didn't see the boy anywhere. Where was his ki? Herb scanned the windows and stone decorations for a hint of lost life. The first and second windows down were clean, but the third…

Herb didn't get a chance to further inspect the third window down after a blue lance of ki as thick as a bludger exploded in his chest and blew him dozens of meters back through the air.

Ranma didn't bother with taunts and games. He trusted Pluto when she said that either Herb died now or Harry died later. Harry deserved more from life and Ranma knew damn well how much Herb deserved to burn in hell. Taking a life was never easy, but it wouldn't be the first time Ranma killed in anger. It would be the first time his victim wasn't an immortal phoenix-king capable of reincarnation. Ranma embraced the Soul of Ice and began sending ki vacuum blades into the air ahead of Herb in an attempt to lead his target.

It's a pity that Herb wouldn't die so easily.

The Musk Prince shook off his surprise and regained control of his own flight path, arcing high into the sky away from land based attackers. If he hadn't figured out who was attacking him before, the vacuum blades and foot long glowing claws answered that question for him.

"_Saotome! How..."_

Did he still not realize Ranma was playing for keeps? Two more enhanced mid-air leaps brought Ranma even with the son of a dragon.

"_...in the Seven Hells-" _

Herb stopped talking when he saw his worst rival outside of Jusenkyo Valley draw ki to him in volumes Herb hasn't himself used since the two brought down a mountain together.

Two hundred meters below, Sailor Pluto looked on from a tower near very peak of Hogwarts. Blue and gold flares of pure life force cast shadows as far away as Hogsmeade . Once again the Earth shook and windows rattled as a massive air-burst ripped trees from the ground and stunned thousands of fish in Black Lake. The Whomping Willow would never be the same. A figure fell to the Earth in free fall.

Pluto saw a chance to end it.

"Dead Scream."

A glowing purple orb of planetary magic surged downrange and made contact with the ground immediately under the falling man, exploding violently outward.

Pluto's attack may have been smaller in volume than Ranma's ki bomb of moments before, but the power of Pluto was steeped in Death and Time. Injuries which should have healed naturally over days or weeks festered in seconds. Injured flesh fell to rot and disease upon contact with her magic. Portions of the half-dragon prince's back and left leg were already lost.

With a ki master approaching from directly above and a Senshi bearing in on him from the castle, Herb had no choice but to turn and run. Perhaps if he could just reach the forest line across the lake then he could find a hole to hide in for one night.

* * *

The Ministry of Magic's Yule Ball was fast becoming a bloodbath.

As many as one in four aurors turned on their fellows, cutting the number of uniformed wizards facing a larger number of Death Eaters in half after the first volley. This act of treachery was one of the first things many frightened party goers saw, even before Senshi began to scythe through the dark wizard lines.

Magic tore through the crowd. Witches and wizards in their very finest robes panicked and screamed, as their fathers and sisters fell to random spells. Some, staff from Saint Mungo's mostly, pulled out their wands and began reversing as much of the damage as they could. Of course the only thing you could do for a socialite victim of the Killing Curse was to close her eyes and recite a prayer for the dead. Minsiter for Magic Rufus Scrimgeour paid for his open support of Harry Potter with his life as no less than three dark curses connected with his body, one of them coming from the depths of the Yule Ball crowd.

It could have been a rout... complete and total surrender for the Ministry elite trapped in its own ballroom by wizards who delight in death and torture... but it wasn't.

True, much of the crowd fell to panic from the very onset but not all of them. No. There were those who had seen Harry Potter step forward when their own Ministry trained aurors stepped back. They saw five girls stand by Harry and rush to the attack when two dozen wands aimed to cut them down from less than five meters away. A Dark Lord and half his followers sought to kill the Chosen One and his wife, the Princess of the Moon, in a hail of spellfire. They missed. They also missed those Senshi, but the Senshi didn't miss when they rained elemental death upon on their foes. Those English wizards and witches that believed in Harry Potter saw all of this and took heart. Maybe they could fight and win like Harry Potter did.

Near the front of the civilian crowd, Neville stood before his Gran holding the strongest shield spell he knew. To his side, Padma and Parvati were shielding their mother and her sister who was visiting from India over the Holidays.

"Neville, dear?"

"Yes, Gran?"

"I can cast a shield spell as well as any in the Longbottom family tree; where do you think your father got it all? Why don't you stop letting me hold you back?"

Neville looked back at his grandmother, the woman who raised him as long as he could remember, and smiled.

"Thank you, Gran. I won't let you down."

"No, Neville. You won't."

Under other circumstances, Neville Longbottom would have hugged the woman tightly for giving him the greatest compliment she's ever given him. Tonight, Harry needed help. Nev looked to his classmates who were both shooting him nervous looks.

"Pav. Padma. You two bring your club brooms with you tonight?"

The girls shared a quick glance at each other before turning back to their fellow D.A. member. Both nodded.

"I aim to get some revenge for what those bastards did to my parents... for what they're trying to do tonight. Are you with me?" The twins both nodded without needing to turn to each other.

An irate aunt began shouting in Hindi about a woman's place.

"Your daughters can fly off with my grandson... or if you prefer... we can all die and your daughters be sold into slavery or prostitution by those dark bastards across the way. Which outcome do you prefer, Madam?"

As the first three broom riders of _Harry's_ D.A. assembled high above the crowd and looked for any other club members they could find while mindful of hexes, two family matrons sought to occupy a hysterical aunt by opening negotiations for an arranged marriage. The teens heard none of this, of course.

As three broom riders became five and then seven, Sailor Mars dodged another one of those green spells. She didn't know what it was for, but her left arm was numb after two of them and she couldn't cast another attack with only one good arm. Mercury stepped up to her side.

"_Mars! I think its best you fall back for now!"_

Mars looked determinedly at the breached door which taunted her from the other side of a wall of dark wizards. Their Princess needed them. Who knows what kind of trouble Meatball Head could get into without proper support?

"_Mars… you can't fight like that. I'll help Jupiter and Venus clean up the last of them and then we all push through together."_

"_Together."_Mars grudgingly nodded. _"Any word from home?"_

"Pluto put the Outers on alert. They're guarding Small Lady from an unknown threat. Neptune doesn't know where Pluto took off to."

"Damn. Go on, Mercury, help the others. I'll be waiting for you to show me the door."

Mercury put her hand on Mars' shoulder for a moment before turning to cast one of her binding spells on the remaining dark wizards when a shadow passed overhead.

"Expulso. Reducto-Reducto-Stupefy!" Neville swept across the ballroom, surprising friend and foe alike.

He and six other D.A. members made the turncoat aurors pay for their treachery. Three months of secret aerial combat practice was paying for itself as the land locked dark wizards seemed unable to hit the nimble students despite their best efforts.

Where the Dark Lord's followers started the battle with two dozen black cloaked fighters and a dozen more agents hidden behind colorful robes, now only half dozen of their best remained in a tight group around the entry door. As loyal as they were to the Dark Lord, they knew when the odds were against them and silently agreed to signal a portkey escape. Six standing wizards and nearly a dozen of the fallen vanished as one, leaving Senshi and wizarding host alike as surprised in their victory as they were in the initial attack.

As some cried out in victory and others cried out in pain, many turned their attention to flashes of light, muffled noises and the occasional scream of pain that could still be heard from the Lobby beyond.

"_Girls! Our Princess needs us!" _

Mars yelled out and received immediate agreement from her three fellow Senshi. As one, the worn and bruised warriors of love and justice stalked up to the open doorway.

* * *

Prince Herb despised the game of predator and prey that he was forced to play this night. He was the son of a King. His mother was a dragon given female form. It was beneath him to be prey.

And yet he had no other choice. His injuries and a constant stream of high energy explosions prevented him from starting an offensive of his own. Too soon he found himself hemmed in against the lake shore with no easy path to the nearby forest save over frigid water. Another purple ball of death and decay lit up the ground before him. Staying in one place would clearly be ill advised.

Even as Prince Herb summoned his remaining strength and kicked off of the ground, instinct was screaming that even this was a bad idea.

In this case, instinct was right. Ranma was waiting for Herb to make the jump over open water. A huge geyser of water blossomed as Ranma slammed into the Musk Prince. It was the last step of a carefully planned hunt. When the bubbles of disturbed air cleared away, a red head could be seen through the murky depths slowly crushing a much smaller bunny-girl. The smaller girl struggled as much as she could, but her lungs were smaller and her heart was beating faster and she lost body heat far quicker than Ranma. As Herb reached her limits, kicks slowed and scratching fingers slipped free of Ranma's arms. Herb blacked out.

One minute later, a soaked and shivering redhead walked out of Black Lake and onto the nearby shore. A limp form fell from her shoulder and hit the ground like a sack of potatoes.

"_She's not dead yet."_

"_I know."_

"_It's hard."_

"_You've done well. We owe you more than I can say." _Pluto looked to the cold form lying motionless on the ground next to Ranma's bare feet. _"I'll do it. __There is no need for you to cross that line tonight when I crossed it long before you were born."_

Pluto summoned the Garnet Rod and slowly brought one end up to Ranma's shoulder.

"_Go to Shampoo. Get cleaned up and eat something. By nightfall-"_ Pluto looked up to the night sky above her and smirked just a bit. _"By __**our**__ nightfall, Usagi will no doubt wish to bestow another honor upon you. I'll try to dissuade her from giving you a Senshi bride for real this time… but no guarantees."_

With that, Pluto tapped Ranma on the shoulder and sent her back to the arms of a worried amazon.

"_And you…" _

Pluto looked down to the broken form lying on the water's edge. She could begin to hear voices in the Castle above… the alarm was finally being raised by those who were willing to brave the open corridors again.

"_You have cost me much. Be thankful that I can reverse the bulk of it, not that you would understand even if you could hear me."_ Pluto briefly considered her options to dispose of the serial rapist and murderer lying at her feet. 'He' would be going to a very bad place when his spirit finally did free itself from it's body.

Ahhhhhhh… Pluto smiled in a way that no other Senshi had ever seen her smile before. It's been a _long_ time since she personally ferried anyone over the River Styx… maybe today was the day she checked up on her old associates and brought Little Miss Herb here with her?

Usagi would not have approved of Pluto's smile if she had been there to see it.

* * *

"_Cuteness!"_

"_Unn?" _ The pink haired junior princess grunted around the edges of her jelly doughnut.

"_Can you teach me kung fu?"_ Hotaru thought that maybe if she exercised more that maybe she wouldn't be so weak all the time.

"_Don__ be filly… (gulp) I don't know any of that stuff. Why would I punch bricks when I can just charm them into cheese? Hurts less too." _Cuteness looked over the pile of presents for the four hundredth time. When were Mommy and Daddy going to get here?

"_But I thought-"_ Hotaru saw her best friend's confused stare. _"Nevermind."_

_

* * *

_

-Earlier.-

"Ow!"

"Sorry, Love."

"Don't worry, my Harry. I land on bottom every time I fight evil!" Sailor Moon giggled like a schoolgirl. "Got used to it long ago!"

"Just the same, we'd better get up. You fell on the floor but Lady Malfoy was kind enough to break my fall."

Hero and heroine stood together and collected themselves as another form stepped past the ruined ballroom door and into the Ministry lobby.

"Tom." Harry cautiously greeted the Dark Lord opposite him.

"You learned a lot from that old fool, Potter, I'll grant you that, but you're about to find out that his lessons fell short of the mark." Voldemort held his wand high and cast another great fire snake, just as he had the last time they were in this very room together. "Are you afraid?"

The massive beast of flames hissed and snapped without advancing. Perhaps Voldemort hoped to see some pain or hopelessness on their faces.

"Do not be afraid, my Harry, for I am your shield." Sailor Moon's sweet voice warmed Harry's heart.

"And I am your sword, Love."

Two wands and a crystal scepter rose together to meet the Dark Lord's challenge.

The great flame serpent opened its maw and struck. In response, Moon's scepter flared brilliantly as did two crescent moon sigils. The snake fell headlong into a pulsing dome of white energy through which the Fiendfyre beast could not pass.

Harry launched a matching pair of exploding hexes while sliding left. He wanted to keep moving even if he did have the best shield possible to work with.

Rather than lose control of his flame snake and have it turn on its creator, Voldemort canceled the spell and dodged to one side.

Soon Moon's shield was awash in dark curses and spells of the highest caliber. Harry returned Voldemort's fire as best he could but there was a gap between Reductors and animated stone goliaths that Harry just couldn't seem to account for. Despite his frustration at failing to pierce Moon's shield even once, Voldemort found the time to taunt Harry.

"Idiot boy. How they can allow someone as weak as you to teach even the younger students is beyond me. You are not at Dumbledore's level; you are a simple fool that relies on textbooks to teach you magic. You **will **fail."

Harry hesitated for a moment, but not for the reason Voldemort might want him to.

"You know what, Tom? You're right! School yard hexes don't cut it, do they? I've been going about this all wrong from the start!"

Harry focused not on his internal magic, but on a magic that went completely counter to the angry and destructive spells that he had been using. He focused on the Lunar link that Jusenkyo provided, the magic that Usagi blessed him with of her own free will. If Harry didn't need to be Sailor Moon to cast spells with the Scepter of Prissiness, then does he need to have the scepter in hand to cast white magic at all?

Harry focused on his connection and drew it forth as if he was asking the Moon itself to power a Patronus Charm. He added his love for Usagi and felt a wonderful surge of power flow through his being. Holding his left hand back in order to better focus on casting a single spell, Harry jabbed forward and yelled the first words that came to mind.

"Moon Patronum!"

A silvery white globe of power flew out of Harry's wand and crashed through Voldemort's guard. The Dark Lord's resulting scream was music to Harry's ears. Voldemort's current body was the product of a dark ritual- not his original form by any stretch of the imagination- and Lunar white magic was best at countering dark magics and purification. Of course this kind of magic would tear Voldmort's current body into shreds!

Amidst the pain, Voldemort found his gaze drawn to the stone floor at his feet. Of course… there was one more tactic he could use to break this farce of a duel.

Before Harry could send another Moon based attack the Dark Lord's way, Moon's shield was engulfed in an inky black cloud which blocked Harry and Sailor Moon from seeing Voldemort's next move.

"I don't believe this is a retreat on his part." Harry ventured.

"Nor I, my Harry. We should stay on gua-" Before she could finish her sentence, a fountain of stone and earth shot up from the floor in between them.

A pale white hand reached out and grabbed the Scepter of Prissiness by its shaft while another pumped a banishing charm into Moon's stomach. Harry still had his left arm blocking his face when the Dark Lord wheeled around and beat him once with his off hand before giving him a banisher to the chest as well.

"AND NOW YOU SEE WHY I AM THE GREATEST WIZARD THAT EVER LIVED! AVADA KEDAVRA!"

Harry did manage to spin out of the way of the Dark Lord's Killing Curse, but he dropped his newer wand while pushing off the ground.

"Avada Kedavra!" "Moon Patronum!"

Harry's counter was slightly shorter than the Killing Curse and made up for the slight pause in casting after Voldemort began.

As was the case before, a well timed pair of spells from two competing brother wands locked together in an incandescent chain of magic from one wand tip to the other.

"Avada Kedavra!" Nothing happened.

"Who's the idiot schoolboy now? That scepter in your hands isn't any good with dark magics… quite the opposite in fact!"

And Harry wasn't joking, Voldemort's attempt to channel killing intent through the Moon Kingdom artifact backfired to the point that he had to drop it lest his hand catch fire.

While the same golden threads of power from before began to surge and flow across their magical connection, Voldemort grinned once more.

"No matter! What's important is that your bitch's shield is down!"

Voldemort looked to the floor just inside of their magical cage. Harry hadn't paid any attention to what fell inside the boundaries of the brother wand effect until the Dark Lord brought it to his attention. Harry almost lost the mental battle right there. Narcissa Riddle was standing over a still dazed Sailor Moon, wand in hand.

"Narcissa! Kill her now!"

Harry's mind was in a panic so complete that Voldemort was nearly victorious even without Narcissa moving a muscle but she did. Narcissa aimed her wand at _her husband_. The threads of power hanging between two wands shifted and bounced again, not because Harry was pushing any harder but because Tom was distracted.

Narcissa Riddle giggled in a way Harry found disturbingly similar to Bellatrix Lestrange.

"For the first time in twenty years, _husband dear_, I feel like I finally understand my sister. AVADA KEDAVRA!"

Narcissa's final cry tore Voldemort from his surprise. Narcissa turned on him. **Him**. No one turns on the Dark Lord after he claims them as his own… _no one! _Tom Riddle tore his wand free of the magical short circuit that nearly had his opponent beaten and wandless just in time to dodge Narcissa's Killing Curse and throw back one of his own.

Two wizards watched the once proud woman collapse to the floor. As it was with Severus Snape, Narcissa's freedom came at the cost of her own life.

"Once again, Potter, it falls to the two of us to settle things-"

"Umm, no. It doesn't." That wasn't Potter.

Harry and the Dark Lord both turned from the dead woman lying next to Sailor Moon… who had finally managed to regain her footing even if her hands were empty… to look back towards the ballroom door.

Senshi. Four of them.

"This is a dance, Ugly. You can either dance or you can leave." Sailor Venus had her left hand on her hip but her right was extended as if to take Voldemort's hand. Her index finger started glowing gold. "So… you wanna dance?"

Senshi sigils began to glow all around the Dark Lord. Searching through his Dark Mark, he sensed that all conscious Death Eaters were gone, having taken their portkeys back to Riddle (Malfoy) Manor already.

With a sneer, Voldemort spat once on the floor and portkeyed away.

"_I don't think he knows how to dance, Venus. I bet you just hurt his feelings and now he's gonna pour out his heart to Dear Diary." _ Jupiter chipped in.

"_I guess they don't make Dark Lords like they used to, huh?"_ Venus looked over to Harry and winked.

"_Actually, he had a diary when he went to school. Remember the memory I showed you about killing a big snake? That one…"_ Harry was a bit numb right now and couldn't decide for himself if the girls' comments were serious, good jokes or bad jokes. He went with serious for now.

"_I bet Zoisite had a diary… the little sissy." _Sailor Moon came up and hugged Harry from behind. _"So what's the damage one room over, you guys?"_

Sailor Mercury pulled out her Mercury Computer and pulled up a few general area scans.

"_Mars' arm is numb, but you or Saturn can take care of it. Jupiter sprained her ankle, again no big deal… our side has four dozen minor wounds requiring attention, twelve serious wounds requiring hospitalization and eight emergency cases. Fourteen dead . The other side took all minor and moderate cases with them leaving three to die on the floor. They lost eleven to Senshi attack and nine to wizards."_ Mercury looked up_. "One of the dead is your Minister Scrimgeour."_

From her position plastered on Harry's back, Sailor Moon looked around for her scepter. "I'll attend the funerals of course…" The girls all nodded with their Princess. "But I can do something about the rest of them. Come on… everyone inside the ballroom and don't let them take anyone to the hospital first."

Sailor Mars used her good arm to hand Moon back her crystal focus. "You should change back to your Royal gown, Princess. They lost their leader… they will need another."

Moon stepped away from the warmth and safety of her Harry and took the scepter from Mars, immediately transforming into her Royal persona at the same time.

"They still have a leader in Harry. He will need our support now more than ever before, everyone. Come on… we have some more saving to do…" Princess Usagi stopped when she noticed Harry still hadn't moved. "My, Harry?"

With tears falling down his cheeks, Harry whispered, "I almost lost you."

The Princess gave her Intended a sad smile and said, "That's what it means to be a Senshi, Harry. You will _almost_ lose me again. It's bound to happen."

She stepped closer and took his hands in hers. "Remember, my love. If I do die in the future, you now know how to bring me back."

Princess Usagi placed a delicate kiss on each tear stained cheek before letting out a soft giggle.

"Just remember… I want to come back in a smaller, warmer room next time. And no strangers!"

Harry wanted to laugh at her joke. He wanted to laugh but he couldn't… but he could smile.

Usagi smiled back warmly giving him strength enough for one night. She turned one more time, pulling him along behind her to the ballroom door. It was time to go heal people.

**Chapter End**

Chapter Notes: Wow. That was more of a double chapter than a single. No wonder it took so damn long to write! Than you to all you reviewers and readers out there. I know there isn't an omake in here, but I've got an idea for one that should be awesome as soon as I can get it just right.

**Reviewers:**

**Firehedgehog –** Yes, the wedding was fun as hell to write what with Flash Gordon and Beetlejuice mixed into the spoken lines. I almost went with the Princess Bride's Priest too, but backed off at the last minute.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** These chapters are growing in complexity, I think. Of course a triple crossover breeds complexity and I can't remember how many times I deleted a few lines after thinking 'shit, that leads nowhere'.

**Miss A – **The sex jokes may be getting old, but I am too. My sons and I trade fart jokes every day and my wife and I trade sex jokes every night. While talking about sex, mind you, not while having it... unless you time the punch line just right...

**Twylyte –** I didn't mean to write an emotional fic to begin with. It just kinda fell into place. Thanks for the compliments.

**Wonderbee31 –** Narcy made a break for it. I'm both happy and sad about it, really. Not sure if Happi's gonna get another mention or not...

**WhiteElfElder –** I sort of see Narcissa as a product of her environment. Sure she didn't try to break out of the evil like Andromeda did, but in her defense those Malfoy family jewels were really shiny.

**Cloud Dancer1014 –** Thanks. If only I could express emotion half as well in real life, then... screw it, nevermind.

**Xardoth – **Kodachi's middle name is creepy. That was my way of giving her closure.

**cockroach62 –** Your answer depends on who you ask and how many people are listening in at the time.

**Fire From Above –** So exhausting that I wrote an intermission into the chapter! Cissy nearly played a major role. If only Voldie had cast a different spell to put her in her place. Blame my pre-reader for that live/die call.

**Eric13 –** The character list is bulky at times, I'll give you that. I can't just cut the focus down to Harry/Usagi with what I've written into the story so far, but if I had to do it all over again I'd probably go that rout. These are the pitfalls of a triple crossover.

**nxkris – **thanks I hope you forgive the long wait due to excessive volume.

**docfrodo –** This realism with Sailor Moon probably means I have an unhealthy obsession with young Japanese girls. Let me go ask one what she thinks about it.

**ariel stormcloud – **Thanks!

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** Thanks for complimenting the interview. For anyone interested in 'researching' the club Kodachi went to, it's real and their web page has pictures.

**SomeGuyFawkes – **Thank you.

**ChronoBlade –** Naru would forgive her, but would she forgive me? It was more 'prove I know who Naru is' than anything else. Now that the shit has hit the fan, will the trip continue as planned? Will Harry come back to England early? Stay tuned!

**Draxsis Felhunter –** Beetlejuice will never get old. That 'seemless' feel was one of my main goals doing this and I think it did take a while to get there. Thanks for commenting on it.

**dglsprincess105 – **You channeled Cissy, didn't you? You know... it probably is about time to do another flash forward... isn't it?

**Grinnerz –** Ranma? Sure. The others? Maybe... Shamps for sure and Kasumi kinda deserves to be immortal, don't you think? Our version of Belldandy!


	12. It Could Have Been Worse

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Twelve: It Could Have Been Worse**

December 25th , 1996

"_What took you so long!"_ Cuteness wrapped her arms around her mother's waist and squeezed for all she was worth. "Merry Christmas!"

Crown Princess Usagi released Harry's hand and wrapped her own arms around the pink haired little girl. Just above Cuteness's head, a very tired looking Usagi turned to her fiance... or husband depending on who you ask... and smiled.

"Merry Christmas, Cuteness." Harry placed a kiss on his girl's head. "I'm terribly sorry about coming back so late, but there was some serious business back in England. It wasn't at all pleasant but we simply couldn't rush through it."

As Harry and Cuteness greeted each other, the room around them began to fill. Hermione and Luna walked in and took seats on a sofa. Ranma and Shampoo were kneeling on the soft carpet floor close to a sparkling, enchanted pine tree and the pile of presents underneath. Ikuko, Kenji and Shingo were all standing on the opposite side of the tree as Ranma. Rei and Makoto were whispering to each other in the hallway, though Ami and Minako were currently indisposed. Those two both had family who expected their girls to be home on Christmas morning. Haruka could be heard laughing through another open door as she, Michiru and Hotaru went to freshen up.

"_What happened?"_ Cuteness asked as she looked up to Harry's eyes.

He met her gaze. Not that she could see it, but there was a weary sadness behind his smile. Luckily, he had both wife and daughter within reach, else there would be no smile at all.

* * *

It was time to go heal people.

Harry, Usagi and her Senshi guard stepped through the distorted remains of the ballroom door and into post battle chaos.

A few healers were working on four bodies lying near the center of the ballroom floor and many other injured witches and wizards were either limping or being levitated their way. At random locations across the floor, people could be seen kneeling and crying over lost loved ones.

"Harry!"

Harry and the Senshi looked up to see Neville riding above them, a dark skinned witch to either flank.

"Nev! Good to see you made it through alright." Harry looked at the crowd that was now beginning to notice that their Chosen One and the Crown Princess had returned to the room. There was clearly no gloating Dark Lord come to enslave their families.

"Did you... is he gone?"

At Harry's nod, several people began moving the attack's worst victims. Clearly a medical chain of command had already been established in the crowd. Noble but also counterproductive this evening.

"Sonorous..." Harry addressed the crowd.

"Please do not try to move injured wizards and witches outside of this room." He had to continue over several shouts of indignation. "We can heal everyone in this room as long as they don't leave before Usagi casts her spell. Remember Diagon Alley! We can and will do that again here."

Harry looked at Usagi and jerked his head towards the center of the room. Usagi took one look at the two nearest victims... one seemed to have an unquenchable yellow fire burning through his abdomen... and raised her scepter right where she was.

Only a handful of the ball attendees witnessed the first attack on Diagon Alley and none of them had enough of their wits about them at the time to remember the glowing scepter fill with Lunar magic. There were also few who saw Harry blast Dumbledore, though more could remember the wall of white magic washing down Diagon Alley wiping battle injuries clean. Everyone in the room who wasn't moments from death gaped in shock as they saw the Crown Princess of the Moon draw heavily on her power.

Both hands on the scepter, she held it high above her own head. As with Harry's white magic nuke from before, she uttered no words, she only concentrated with her eyes closed and drew upon Lunar power. Her moon sigil flared in time with the scepter, the two lights quickly overpowering all of the candles and lanterns which lined the ballroom's walls. Usagi opened her eyes and in doing so she locked gazes with her husband (by local standards anyway) and released the spell.

The room-wide whiteout was not unexpected, nor was the complete recovery of all injured. The aftermath, though... completely out of left field.

"_H-Harry?" _Usagi asked. _ "Why are they doing that?"_

Harry turned away from his personal goddess to see that... well... others in the room seemed to think the same way. The vast majority of wizards and witches, those who weren't still mourning the dead, were staring and whispering with an intensity that far outstripped anything the Boy-Who-Lived ever experienced. A few of them were on their knees.

"_Do we need to get her out of here Harry?" _Mars whispered.

"Let's not overreact..." Harry looked through the crowd. He could see a few familiar faces, but not anyone that he thought could help them restore any kind of order just yet.

He caught a swift movement above his head. Ah, there's someone he could trust...

"Nev! Can you get help us out?"

In a blur of motion, Neville and the Patil sisters flew down and dismounted their brooms. Four more D.A. members did the same thing behind them in short order.

"I know we haven't played the 'crowd control auror' game during a meeting, but do you think that you and the others could keep between the Senshi and everyone else for a while?"

"Don't worry captain sexy pants!" Parvati chirped over Nev's shoulder.

"I would be happy to help maintain order, Harry." Padma added. "I don't think paint balls or sparks will do the trick... should we use Aguamenti's or light Stinging Hexes if they get too close?"

"Just stand between us and them and look like you're supposed to be there... ought to be enough."

With a mix of nods and giggles, the seven D.A. members spread out in a loose crescent around Harry and the Senshi.

Just as Harry was beginning to really panic over what the Next Step should be, a political savior came in the form of Damien Greengrass.

"Lord Potter! Harry!"

The Slytherin lord was closely followed by his wife and two eldest daughters.

"Lord Greengrass! Thank Merlin you're here." Harry stepped up and put his hand on Nev's shoulder as a sign to let them through.

Damien politely nodded to Neville and to the twins to either side as he approached Harry and Usagi.

"You do seem a bit out of your element now that the Dark Lord has left us. Did you hear about the Minister?"

What little happiness showed on Harry's face fell away. Rufus was a bit of a deal maker but that didn't mean Harry thought him any less capable as Minister than anyone else save Dumbledore could have been.

"Even with Tom running away, this is going to hurt. I don't even know who's next in line, you know?"

"I can answer that easily enough."

A foul toadish looking witch waddled up behind Lord Greengrass, roughly shoving Neville out of the way.

"As the Senior Under-Secretary to the Minister for Magic, when the Minister passses unexpectedly, the reins of governance pass to me until a Interim Minister is appointed or a new Minister is voted in!" Delores Umbridge stood nose to chin with Harry in a way that she probably expected to be intimidating. "Which mean's, young man, that I am 'next in line' until I say otherwise."

Harry didn't even bother to get Lord Greengrass's opinion on the matter. "Fuck no you are not next in line. I didn't just spend my evening running off a Dark Lord just so the ugly twat that cut open my hand and tried to Crucio me could become acting Minister!"

Delores's grin went from malicious to shark like during his rant.

"And I do believe that an entire ballroom of witnesses just heard you make treasonous declarations before the acting Minister of Magic! I'll have you and your wife in Azkaban by sunup! Aurors!"

Within the crowd of witches and wizards, not one auror stepped forward. Not because there were no survivors, but because none chose to obey the order.

"Aurors!" Delores bellowed, yet still none came to her side. Instead, a rough hand grabbed her arm. Umbridge spun around to see who her new victim would be.

"I do believe, Madam, that you need to consider early retirement." Neville did not like being batted aside by this woman.

"Get you're hands off me, boy!" Delores went for her wand, but Padma grabbed her wrist. "You'll all get the Kiss for this! I'm the Minister for Magic!"

"You are not." Lord Greengrass countered. "You aren't even the Interim Minister. You couldn't possibly have been approved by all of the Department Heads already... half of them aren't even in the room."

"Inconsequential, I assure you! I'll have those approvals, I'll be voted in and you will be imprisoned... all of you!" The toad looked into a sea of faces hoping to get this over with as soon as possible. She had a country to run and she just couldn't wait to start running it. "Mister Thicknesse! Mister Thicknesse, please come here."

As a man with a long black beard and glinting eyes stepped out of the crowd, one or two other wizards could be seen moving through the crowd behind him. Could they be the disputed Department Heads?

"Dear Pius!" Delores' tone became saccharine in the extreme. "With our very dear Minister Scrimgeour deceased, we need to step forward into a new, more secure age. I, as Senior Under-Secretary to the Minister, am of course the most obvious choice so I should like to hear your approval of my intent to stand as Minister in front of these witnesses."

Pius looked between Delores and the others surrounding him. Witches, wizards and magical girls looked on in anticipation of his actions. As the current Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, his recommendation did have some weight and both she and Lord Greengrass knew it.

"I seem to have overheard some accusation or other of an unforgivable being cast... could you clarify that for me, Delores?" The man looked between Delores and Harry with no clear bias showing.

"Lies! No such thing happened! Mister Potter broke nearly every school rule in existence during my time as Defense Professor and then as High Inquisitor and here he is, thinking I should be the one punished for showing him the rule of law!"

"I'd be happy to swear a binding oath and provide testimony against her, Sir." Harry countered.

Pius, not having a clear winner in his mind, looked to Lord Greengrass. "Lord Potter is your charge, is he not? Can you tell me what you know of his character?"

Damien quickly looked over to a barely restrained Harry Potter and winked. "Good Sir... It is my honor to say that you will not find a better man in terms of honor and personal conduct than young Lord Potter. Though he lacks traditional lordly etiquette, he is neither corrupted by greed nor likely to abuse his station. In fact, were it not for his current marital status, I would have gladly offered the hand of my eldest daughter to him at the least sign of interest."

Daphne's face began to burn in embarrassment to the side. If she hadn't used a birth control charm during that one night last year...

Astoria's own cheeks gained a hint of blush as well; the ghost of a thought about daddy mentioning her rather than her sister passing through her mind. And why not? The young Lord Potter's done a fine job of saving her or her family on several occasions... plus, he does have pretty eyes...

As the Greengrass girls went red in the face, Delores went purple.

"Well, in that case-" But Pius was interrupted.

"You can't be serious." No, Harry. Don't say it. "That boy is a threat to Ministry authority! His outlaw club has just shown its true colors and ignored the Underage Sorcery restrictions. They actually cursed Ministry employees! He can't be let free! He'll overthrow the Ministry to rule as a king – setting that foreign mongrel above honest British wizards and witches as his queen!"

If it weren't for the fact that he knew Usagi would disapprove, Harry would have beat the whore to the ground for that 'mongrel' remark. Anyone paying attention saw him tense at the word.

"Madam Umbridge, that is enough! You'll not be getting my approval, not after such disrespect against the only reason my son still lives." The man huffed and spoke to Lord Greengrass. "Anyone who could insult Luna's Daughter so soon after she ably demonstrated true nobility and power is not fit to govern. I do not approve of Madam Umbridge."

As Harry grinned smugly and Delores suffered a mental meltdown, the Head of the DMLE turned to Lord Greengrass and the Lord and Lady Potter.

"I think, Delores, that it's time for you to move along and leave tonight's recovery efforts to those who know what they are doing." Damien called with all the pureblood arrogance that he could. Harry tried to ignore the Lucius Malfoy flashbacks Damien's tone dredged up.

Neville and Padma finally released the ugly toad woman who then staggered back several paces. Several other members of the D.A. gripped their wands, just in case. Delores looked like she wanted to take things further but she knew what kind of administrative hurdles she'd now have to overcome, not the least of which was changing Mister Thicknesse's mind.

"Well now... we just have to decide who can be Minister. Looks like an emergency Wizengamot session will be in order. Don't expect that before New Year's though, probably shouldn't expect most members to sober up until after Hogwarts opens again..." Pius looked over the crowd.

Many couples and families were making for the floo lobby and the sanctuary of home as quickly as they could get around the Senshi-D.A. defense rings. As they passed, every pair of eyes lingered on Usagi, the young woman who healed an entire room full of injured people without falling over from magical exhaustion. They saw her standing in silent support of Harry (as she had nothing to offer a conversation about English Magical laws and customs). This silence was incorrectly interpreted by many of the more traditional crowd as being the hallmark of a woman who knows her place... silent and behind her man... and they looked on in approval.

"It's a shame that Lord Potter is too young to run." Pius ventured. "I daresay many of the people in this room would vote for him."

Damien laughed and Harry bit his tongue. "Lord Potter would win over the younger voters easily, but I daresay Dumbledore will have no choice but to throw his hat in the race now. We've few strong names about to pick from... "

Pius was about to comment on the idea of throwing his own name into the hat... it never hurt to see which way the Chosen One would go... when another voice interrupted.

"I'm sorry to say that Dumbledore won't be running this time either."

"And you are, sir?" Harry challenged the man.

The man in question was getting on in years but still looked to have some fight in him. In truth, Harry wondered if he were related to Moody; he looked to be cut of the same cloth as old Mad-Eye.

"You don't remember then, boy. That job you pulled on us in the alley did more than change the Headmaster's mind about you and pull the stick out of Snape's arse... it took away every scab and scar I ever earned, and damned if there weren't hundreds of 'em!" The man took a magical eye on a leather loop out of his pocket and held it for Harry to see. "I wasn't vigilant enough, Potter! You got me!"

Harry was struck dumb. Did he magically stick a new leg and eye into the old auror?

"But that isn't why I'm here, lad. It's Dumbledore."

"Why- what about him? Rufus said that Dumbledore would be attending the ball tonight and he never showed up. We could have used him, to be honest."

Mad-Eye lowered his hand and the magical eye in it. "He didn't show up because he's dead. Albus Dumbledore was killed in a raid on Hogwarts Castle tonight."

Harry didn't respond, not even to blink in recognition of what he'd just heard though others around him did gasp and react as one would expect. The Dark Lord may not still be in the room tonight, but he had succeeded in killing off the two most powerful men in Magical England. The Minister and the Chief Warlock; a battle hardened auror and the Leader of the Light since nineteen forty-five. Gone. Those who managed to not look at the Chosen One and the Moon Princess earlier found themselves looking back to the couple now... They were the only powerful leaders English light magicals had left to follow.

A soft hand came down on Harry's shoulder. Usagi pressed herself into his back so that he wouldn't feel alone in his thoughts.

Mad-Eye had more to say. "I know Scrimgeour's gone, boy, but you seem to have put out all the fires save political ones and those aren't for the likes of you and me to deal with. I think you should get over to the castle, quick as you can. One o' them Senshi girls is waiting for you."

"Which one?" Usagi asked. Harry still hadn't moved.

"Didn't get her name, but she had green hair down past her arse if that's any clue."

Usagi nodded to the rejuvenated ex-auror and linked her arm through Harry's. He was in shock. It was time for her to act.

"Please forgive, Lord Greengrass, but Harry and I are needed at Hogwarts. Can you take care of Ministry for Harry?" Usagi eyed her husband's guardian and spoke in respectful tones.

"Of course, Your Highness." Damien bowed low to the girl who's mother had been the Greengrass family's patron goddess these last seven hundred years. "I shall not rest until our Ministry is stable and secure once again."

"We will find way to keep in touch. Until then." Usagi nodded lightly as did her Senshi. Damien bowed a second time.

The Slytherin lord was quite pleased with himself. Not only would he be able to further repay the debt owed to his young ward, but he also got a chance to prove his worth to the Crown Princess of the Moon. Ambition need not be an evil trait after all. Still... pity about Harry's being married already. He'd have to find another up and coming young man like Harry to match Daphne to. Perhaps that Longbottom boy... On the other hand, Lord Potter might consider a mistress some time down the road in which case Damien still had two younger daughters to offer.

But that was for another night. As the Potters and their international security contingent moved into the floo lobby, Damien found himself more and more occupied with the remaining Ministry officials and aurors who did not sneak away or go looking for a Daily Prophet reporter that wasn't currently dead on the floor.

"My Harry?" Usagi asked as they reached the very center of the Ministry's quite impressive Lobby floor. "How can we get to Hogwarts from here?"

Harry looked at her. Good. He was finally coming around.

"I really... don't think apparating is all that good an idea right now." His grip on her arm tightened a little.

"If we can get outside, a Sailor Teleport should take us right to the spot we teleported out from last time we were there." Mercury offered from the side.

Usagi looked at her Senshi and then at Harry's friends. Harry spoke directly to Neville before, so she felt comfortable doing it too.

"Neville?" The young man in question stood a little straighter. "Can you and your friends here escort us to a street or alleyway outside without getting noticed by the wrong people?"

Neville looked around at the other young wizards and witches around him. They all nodded. "Absolutely. Anything for Harry... and for you, Your Highness."

"Thank you Neville. Harry is proud to call you friend, and so am I." Usagi had a confident smile that seemed entirely out of place next to Harry's slow recovery.

"Uhh, yeah, Nev. You all did great. Every one of you. Full marks all around." Professor Potter was attempting to take control. What would he do when he could admit to himself that the most important influence in his life short of Voldemeort just died? That he had the 'Leader of the Light' title all to himself now? That Harry and Hermione were likely to begin teaching **all **Defense classes once the new term started?

"_Let's go outside, my Harry. We need to go talk to Pluto and for that we need a Sailor Teleport." _Harry nodded at her soft words and allowed her to guide him out of the Ministry.

* * *

Sailor Pluto stood alone in the Hogwarts courtyard and waited.

It was difficult to tell precisely when things would happen with Harry, but not impossible… the Sailor Teleport from London should be arriving sometime in the next three sec-

A prismatic shaft of light slammed into the sod before her. As the teleport's magical discharge petered out, she pulled a gloved hand away from her eyes and moved to greet her Princess.

"_Your Highness."_

"_Pluto. Is this where you tell me that Albus Dumbledore and Minister Fudge had to die for the future?" _

Usagi asked the question as if she already knew the answer and did not like it. Harry pulled himself further out of the abyss by asking himself if Usagi's heard the wrong answer before. Pluto stepped closer without looking either repentant or insulted at the implications.

"_On the contrary, my Princess. I came to Hogwarts Castle with Ranma in tow as soon as I realized that the time stream had already shifted. It was only by the narrowest of margins that I was able to prevent Mister Potter's swift demise."_

"_I came close enough to death tonight as it was."_ Harry latched onto something easier to handle than Dumbledore's death. _ "Would you mind explaining what did happen tonight? Where's Ranma? You said he came with you."_

"_If you would follow me, I will begin to explain."_ Pluto waived one hand around the castle perimeter rather than towards the open doors behind her.

As Harry and six Senshi moved around the castle, Harry and the others began to notice the odd wizard or three running about through the entry doors. Pluto wasn't leading them any closer, so Harry couldn't tell exactly what was happening. He looked up at the school. It never ceased to amaze him, just how pretty the castle could be when bathed in moonlight...

...except...

...something was missing. Harry had a niggling little thought in the back of his mind that the castle silhouette was not quite right.

"_I first noticed something was wrong when Small Lady did something implying that Mister Saotome had somehow become her father." _

Harry stopped walking. So did Usagi.

"_Tell me you didn't just say that!" _Usagi hissed.

She had her man, her wizard, the father of her children right fucking here and she didn't feel like trading husbands again now that she was alive.

Pluto stopped to assure them. _"Do not be alarmed, Your Highne-"_

"Why the bloody hell not?" On the plus side, Harry was back to normal. "You spend the last half year letting Usagi and me get as close as two people in love can possibly get only to say 'oops, new daddy time' tonight of all nights?"

"Mis- Harry. Cuteness is your daughter. The only way for her not to be your daughter is for you to die." She turned to lead them further around the castle. "I prevented Ranma from becoming Small Lady's father, with Ranma's assistance mind you, by stopping Herb from tearing this castle apart and then hunting you down. We are lucky that he was sent after the Headmaster first else I may have been too late."

"Herb..." Then it hit Harry. "Jusenkyo. He's cursed like us. That's why you didn't see it coming."

"_And if Small lady hadn't acted completely out of character when others could see her, I would have failed to save Crystal Tokyo and the Crystal Millennium. Zero point zero chance of either utopia existing if Harry dies now... not even Mamoru can fill the gap anymore."_

"_But- but then how did Small Lady still exist?" _Mercury butted in. _ "She was different, but she still existed. How did we avoid a reality crushing paradox? You said Ranma was her daddy. There must have been a future to come back from."_

Pluto stopped again. Harry and the others could just make out a pile of loose rubble around the next turn but there wasn't enough light to figure out where the mess came from.

"_Do you really want to know?"_ Pluto's red eyes bored into Usagi's blue.

"_Yes."_

Pluto turned her gaze to the full moon above.

"_There were a lot of possible outcomes... most of them horrible beyond explanation... but I should give you an example of one of the better scenarios... one that still gets us Small Lady even if the Earth itself is cold and lifeless beneath her. What I am about to detail is a future that has about a three percent probability of becoming realized if Harry dies in the near future._

"_Let us start with Harry's death. Herb is sent as an agent of Tom Riddle's Death Eaters and ends one version of the famous prophesy by killing Harry in Riddle's name. Whether it's Jusenkyo or something else I don't know, but all of your attempts to bring Harry back fail. You, Your Highness, are inconsolable. Not only do you lose your husband, but he dies before giving you a child. In a show of respect, the Chinese amazons and the Phoenix Tribe unite with the Senshi to avenge your chosen mate and wipe the Tom and his Death Eaters from the face of history... not that it matters at this point. They also end up eliminating one quarter of Magical England while they're at it. Not pretty. When Sailor Moon's next great enemy approaches, her heart is still too scarred. She is not strong enough. The Senshi fight valiantly but we are swept from the field. As our Princess grieves, so do we and all are weaker for it. As for Small Lady... one night shortly before an ill fated last stand... you and Ranma have too much to drink and get a little careless after crying on each other's shoulders over dead loved ones. I'm too busy fucking Mamoru to notice at that point."_

This was one hell of a story. Harry's never heard anything like this before. Neither has Usagi for that matter.

"_Ranma feels guilty about bedding you and is badly wounded the next day in an attempt to join his wife Shampoo in the afterlife. You are, at this point, ready to die but I do the only thing I can to ensure that Small Lady is born... I abduct both Ranma and yourself and put you in lockdown on the moon. The three of us watch from orbit as, ironically, aliens from the nearby Juraian Empire manage to save more humans via evacuation than I thought were still alive. Then they come to pick us up... the last survivors of a dead planet._

"_The Juraians recognize your power and offer your unborn child a future within their noble house. In exchange, they demand you marry a Juraian lord of their choosing. Spirit broken, you accept immediately. We live, but not happily ever after. We are survivors of a dead planet and only one thing prevents us from not existing entirely."_

"_Small Lady has to come back." _Usagi nearly moaned out her conclusion.

This was the darkest, bleakest possible future Pluto's ever hinted at short of 'everybody dies and a paradox destroys space-time'. And she actually preferred it to some of the alternatives. Damn.

"_She has to come back in order to keep the time stream from collapsing entirely." _Pluto confirmed.

"She has to come back and see how things used to be, knowing that it would all go to hell shortly after she left?" Harry felt a cold lump in his stomach that had nothing to do with Voldemort or Dumbledore... at least, not directly.

Pluto turned her gaze from the moon above to the grass at her feet. _"I spent fifteen seconds in a room with __**that girl**__. Hotaru, Michiru and Haruka spent more time than that with her. I __do __**not**__ want to meet her again."_

Pluto's story completely ignored the deaths of the two most important wizards in Magical England and focused instead on Usagi's poor reaction should Harry die. Even knowing the world Usagi wanted to create in the future did not prepare him for just how important his fiancee could be to the future of Earth as a whole. After a moment of silent reflection on what _could have been_, Harry was the next to speak.

"Why don't we go look at that lovely pile of rock over there. Pluto? Weren't you going to tell us about how an old man died or something?"

* * *

'What happened?' she asked her daddy. On Christmas morn- er almost lunchtime, what could he say?

"Somebody blew a couple of holes in Hogwarts Castle, sweetie. I used your mum's scepter to put it right again. Couldn't fix all of it, though. You don't need to know the rest, honey. It's not worth spoiling Christmas now that we're finally back."

"_Whatever..." _ Cuteness didn't buy that at all, but there were presents to unwrap and much merriment to be had. _"You gotta see this pile! The one from Auntie 'Mione's got unicorns running around it in circles!"_

Harry and Usagi collapsed onto a couch while their nine year old daughter hopped about and made comments on this or that package for a few minutes.

"_...and that's the one I want to open first because, uh... well, because it's from you of course!" _Cuteness giggled as she turned back around to her parents who were silent during her whole display.

"_Hey!" _ Her eyebrows furrowed deeply. _"Why'd you go and fall asleep on me?"_

Harry was draped bonelessly over the couch's side rest, eyes closed and mouth half open. Usagi had gotten comfortable curled into his side with her head on his chest.

"_Damn."_ As Ikuko gasped and Luna giggled at her language, Cuteness climbed onto the couch and worked herself into a somewhat comfortable position between her parents. "Auntie 'Mione? Can you please hit me with a Sleeping Charm?"

The witch in question almost suggested charming her parents awake but those two looked awfully tired. They'd need to get some sleep sooner or later. "Of course, dear."

She raised her wand. "Somnium."

Hermione and Luna threw up a few privacy spells around the sleeping family and turned back to the dojo's other guests. Depending on who she looked at, they were alternately cooing over or making fun of the sleeping family.

"_Makoto."_ Ranma called out from under the Christmas tree. _"Catch!"_

A shiny ribbon wrapped box flew through the air and landed directly in the girl's hands. She looked at him cluelessly.

"_What? Harry would understand and I'll be damned if I'm gonna sit here and wait eight hours for those three to wake up again."_

Makoto shrugged and began to open her present. Soon Shampoo and Ranma had everyone scrambling to catch airborne gifts.

From just outside the room, Setsuna stood as poised and regal as ever to anyone who looked her way, but inside she was trembling. At rest upon that couch was her best possible future... better even than what she had been hoping to achieve with Mamoru and Usagi, though she still wasn't sure why things turn out better... and the slightest little beat of a butterfly's wings in Jusenkyo could cause a storm powerful enough to upset her life's work.

Were the true gods, the ones who controlled even her, laughing? Setsuna was too afraid to ask.

* * *

Harry woke up to a constant tapping on his forehead. He opened his eyes.

Through a cloud of cotton-candy pink hair, he could see the silver-grey eyes of a young witch sparkling merrily back at him. Her eyes… and her finger which was providing the tap-tap-tap that woke him up.

"Morning, Luna."

"Incorrect, Professor Potter." She didn't stop tapping. "Good evening and Merry Christmas are the two greetings you should have used. I'm afraid that will be a broom closet detention… two nights, and I shall supervise."

"How about I give you two nights detention for poking me in the face, Miss Lovegood?"

Luna was about to respond with a suitably risque riposte but stopped when something caught her eyes.

"_Merry Christmas, my little princess! I've woken up your Daddy, so if you'll just do the same for Mummy, we can get through the last of the presents!"_

There was an unexpected burst of motion on top of Harry that nearly undid his bladder control.

"_WAAAAAKKKEE UUUUUPPP!" _

Harry and Usagi both took Cuteness's vocal assault on the chin as it were. Now Harry's ears were ringing _and_ he had to pee. On the other hand, the little pinkette obviously succeeded in waking her mommy as planned.

"_Shut it, Spore!" _Usagi growled out. Wow. Now there's something she hasn't said to Cuteness since the last time she was alive.

"_Bunny! Don't yell at your daughter like that. It will give her a poor self image." _ Ikuko scolded her daughter from across the room.

"_Sorry, Mom." _Sorry to be caught out on it, maybe.

"_And you, young lady..." _Cuteness froze mid raspberry. _ "I'm sure you could have thought of a more festive and loving way to wake your mother, don't you think?"_

_"Yeeessss Grandmaaaaaaa..."_ Properly chastised, Cuteness looked to Usagi and tried again. _"Merry Christmas, Momma. Merry Christmas, Daddy."_

Finally, Cuteness got to have her family Christmas. It may have started late, and some of her aunties watching may have been nervous over how well Harry and Usagi were recovering from last night, but it was a family Christmas dammit and that meant presents and family time. Wrapping paper began to fall to the floor as Cuteness reaped the rewards of being nine. Dolls (including the special edition Sleeping Beauty Sailor Moon with Handsome Prince (not yet revised to include handsome Wizard Lord)), dresses, pink things and a few pieces of jewelry. She got an enchanted diary from Usagi (with Luna's foresight and assistance) but what really silenced the crowd is what she got from her daddy.

After peeling back the wrapping parchments which began life as a potions essay, complete with Troll grade and red comments in Snape's handwriting, Cuteness found herself holding a flat, square wooden box with delicate vinelike inlay patterns and shiny brass hardware. She flipped the catch and swung the box wide open.

After the room wide gasp finished, Harry chose to explain.

"_Now, I did consider giving that to your mother, but… well… that **is** a Potter family heirloom. Your mother is marrying into the family but you've been a Potter since birth. After thinking on it a bit, I knew there could be no better owner than you, my Princess Cuteness."_

The little girl's eyes were sparkling as she dipped one hand into the open box and lifted a centuries old tiara into the air. Light shined off of every curve and facet of the tiara's delicate silver band, gold detailing and light sprinkling of rubies.

"_What do I have to do to get one of those?" _Makoto exclaimed.

"_You have to call him Daddy!" _ Cuteness shot back at Makoto without taking her eyes off of the bestest Christmas present ever (except for having both Momma and Daddy alive at the same time, which she also got this year).

"_I can do that!"_

"_Makoto!" _ Usagi shouted in mock indignation. Behind her, Ikuko was suffering from genuine indignation at Makoto's tease.

The tall brunette pouted and began to assault Usagi with the best puppy-dog eyes she could muster. Usagi only dug further into her man's side and stuck her tongue out at Makoto. While most people in the room were still stuck watching a pink haired little girl slide her tiara onto her brow, Usagi perked up and jogged over too the almost empty present pile. After a quick grab and jog back to Harry's side, she shoved a box into Harry's chest.

"OOF!" Apparently, there was some weight inside the box.

"_Here you go, Harry!"_

"_Thanks, Love."_ Harry shrugged off the pain and pulled at seams in the shiny red and gold paper.

Paper fell to the wayside and the box top was removed. Harry removed a final layer of tissue paper and... what was that thing? He pulled it out of the box.

A rock?

It was a dull grey rock... bigger than a snitch but smaller than a bludger... that Harry thought would make for a good book end. He began to turn it around and look it over.

"_A rock? You got your fiance a rock? You idiot, I always knew you were blonde but that's pretty bad."_ Shingo.

Usagi spun around in a fury. _"It's not just a rock! I went all the way to the Moon to get that! Setsuna already snuck off with the boys, so I had my Luna distract his Luna and Hermione and then I got the others to do a Sailor Teleport to the Moon. I spent, like, forever looking for just the right one, too!"_

A hand came down on her shoulder and she turned to defend herself only to get a warm kiss on the lips. From Harry, of course. He spun the rock around so that Shingo and the others watching the Tsukino sibling shouting match could see why it took 'like forever' to find _this_ one.

"_I thought you said you got it on the Moon." _ Shingo's rebuttal didn't have quite the sting he was hoping for.

"_Of course she did."_ Harry looked over the finely cut flower and vine pattern that occupied one face of the stone- obviously once part of a building or wall of some sort- and smiled. _"It's perfect."_

"_It's home. Part of home anyways..." _Usagi seemed to drift off for a second before snapping back. _"I don't remember much from the Silver Millennium, but I do remember seeing that kind of pattern in the stonework in the broken memories I do have. It's our home, my past and our future. It's a long lost utopia and the promise of a new one, one we will all see in our lifetimes if I have anything to say about it."_

"_And you have a lot of say in the matter, Love. It's absolutely perfect."_ Harry gently set the lunar stone down and drew her into a tight hug. _"It's almost as wonderful a gift as the one you're about to get."_

With everyone watching and Usagi suitably emotional, he pulled a ring-box shaped gift out of its hiding place. Usagi's eyes widened. She wanted to ask if it was what she thought it was, but her jaw just wasn't working. Her hands worked well enough even if they were a bit shaky. Like Cuteness's gift, this one was wrapped in old parchment. Unlike Cuteness's wooden box, this one looked to be made of highly polished white stone and had no visible hardware. She suddenly found herself unable to move, let alone open the box.

"_Now, I know that we're either already married or already engaged depending on who you ask... so this is a little behind schedule." _ One of the girls off to the side gasped, not that Harry was paying attention. His eyes were on the crystal blue orbs locked onto that little box. _"And... and you weren't the only one that found Earthly objects simply lacking the ability to truly express what we have... so like your gift to me, this is also a symbol of what once was and what will be again."_

Harry began to pull the box top up as Usagi seemed to have turned to stone herself. He finished his presentation just as the top cleared the contents.

"_While our daughter's tiara was worn by ladies of the Ancient and Noble House of Potter in days gone by, I have it on good authority that this once belonged to your mother in the Moon Kingdom, Queen Serenity the First."_

All eyes were locked onto a dazzling star set on a gold band. Usagi's sigil began to flicker in and out.

"_It looks like the Silver Crystal only smaller."_ Rei whispered to Hermione nearby.

Usagi still hadn't moved.

"_Let me rephrase that." _ Harry cleared his throat. He also made great ceremony of removing his translation ring and putting it in a pocket. _ "Tsukino Usagi. I love you more than I ever thought I could love anything. Will you marry me?"_

Usagi still hadn't moved. It was like she had been caught in a Full Body-Bind Curse or something. A cloud of pink hair topped by a beautiful tiara moved between Harry and Usagi.

"_Yes I will marry you, Chibi-usa's Daddy,"_ Cuteness cast her voice in the fake grown-up tone every child uses at some point in their lives. She also squeezed her hands over Usagi's cheeks to add more realism to Usagi's 'response'. _"I love y-"_

Cuteness's performance was abruptly cut off when a hand palmed the little girl's face and pushed her away, tiara and all. With one hand curled tight around the sparkling ring, Usagi leapt at Harry and knocked him to the floor.

"Hmmmmuuuuurrrrrrhhhhmm!" Harry might have been calling out in shock or in pain, but it was hard to say something when a girl is trying to suck your face off.

"_I think that means yes." _ One Luna commented from her perch on the other Luna's shoulder.

"_Bunny."_ Ikuko called to her daughter. _"Bunny! Please restrain yourself and answer properly."_

Maybe her little bunny wasn't being proper, but Ikuko still had a brilliant smile on her face. She remembered being scolded by her own mother for using an unseemly method to answer Kenji's marriage proposal some twenty years ago. Has it really been that long? After a few more seconds, Usagi rose up so that she was straddling her fiance, sigil glowing faintly for all to see.

"_Yes! Yes I love you too not that you didn't already know that but I love you and I'll marry you-" _

Right when Usagi looked to be on the edge of an epic run-on sentence, she stopped and smiled. A moment later, she thrust both hands forward; right hand holding the open ring box and left hand with fingers splayed wide open. And trembling... her fingers were wide open and trembling.

Harry did the only logical thing. He moved the ring out of it's home for the last twelve thousand years and slid it onto Usagi's finger. Aside from making Usagi insanely happy, accepting the ring triggered something altogether unexpected.

The ring itself began to flicker, quickly flaring brilliantly before sputtering out again and returning to it's ordinary if pretty non-glowing self.

"_Huh... weird."_ Usagi muttered.

"_Love?"_

"_Yes, my Harry?"_

"_Did you do that on purpose?"_

"_I didn't make it glow."_

"_Not that, Love."_

"_Huh?"_

Harry ran his fingers over Usagi's scalp and pulled one long streamer of hair around for her to see. It was silver.

"_Your sigil is glowing too."_

Usagi's hand immediately went up to her head. Not that it helped; she was glowing, not shaped differently. She willed away the power as she had done countless times before... only this time, it didn't work.

"_It's stuck like that. Pluto, does this mean anything?"_ Usagi hadn't bothered to check for Setsuna first, nor had she cared if the older Senshi was in uniform or not.

"_Nothing bad, I assure you, Your Highness." _ Setsuna replied. She wasn't in uniform, but then this was not a good time to sneak away and do secret things. _"It means that so long as you wear that ring, you accept your place as the Lunar Royal Sovereign. You are the Princess and therefore your silver hair is natural, as is your moon sigil."_

"_I'm not a blonde anymore?" _ Usagi asked.

"_Perhaps if you took off the ring-"_

"_I'm not taking it off!" _ Usagi covered her left had with her right instinctively. There were several giggles in the room.

"_Then all of the blonde jokes will have to focus on Minako from now on, Your Highness."_ Setsuna's comment caused Usagi to smile.

It was with that smile that Usagi became the center of attention as everyone wanted to see The Ring. Everyone female, that is. Naturally female... Jusenkyo doesn't count.

"_Hey, Shamps." _Ranma called out from behind the girl trying to get a closer look at Usagi's ring while still being outside of the main gawkers.

"_Yes, Ranma?" _She looked back. _"Are the phones charged already? We should call Great-grandmother first! I still have village number... learned it by heart when I came over to hunt you down and kill you the first time."_

"_Uhhhh... no. It's not that." _His hesitation stopped Shampoo cold. It's been a long time since she could actually feel a lack of confidence from her wild horse.

"_Something wrong? Pig-boy find us again? Pluto tell you you are next Senshi and have to give up male body forever?" _ She searched deep for something that would knock him off balance. She dropped her voice to a whisper. _"You find you like what we do with polyjuice that night after drinking too-too much Odgen's Finest and you now asking I be Ranma to your Shampoo a second time?"_

"_Wha- nonono. No. Not that I don't trust you when you say I liked it but I just don't remember shit from that night but that's not the point..." _ Ranma looked around. _"Can we go out by the pond for this?"_

A confused and concerned Joketsuzoku warrior nodded and then followed her boyfriend outside. They made their way out to the koi pond and stopped. At first, Ranma just looked into the water's depths and followed the koi as they moved lazily about. It was cold out but not freezing at that moment, not that it mattered with two martial artists who can use their ki to change the ambient air temperature around them. Just as Shampoo was about to splash Ranma to break the ice, he spoke up.

"_I, uh... wanted to thank you for commin' with me... on this trip..."_ Not the best intro, but it was a start.

"_I was happy to come, Ranma. You know that."_ Shampoo responded carefully.

"_I also know that you've never really let go of the idea of us... you know... really gettin' together and havin' kids and stuff. Go back to the village and live to become village elders 'n all that."_ He turned to look at her. _"I know you don't say the things you want to say because of how things were and... and... and it's a good thing you didn't before because I would have stayed away from Jusenkyo Valley if I had a reason to like a psycho stalker chick or something." _

Ranma cursed and kicked a stone into the pond.

"_Look. I'm not all that good at this and you know it. But today... today it's like... it's Christmas, right? You want to say something then you should be able to say it, right?"_

"_Ranma have some thing he want to say to Shampoo?"_ There was a lot of hope in her eyes.

"_Well... it's just... I still don't understand why you ever loved me. You can chase me down for village law and I can understand that. Kiss of Death? It's an insane kind of law but it was one you grew up with... and the Kiss of Marriage too, but I never figured out why you said you loved me."_

"_I just do." _Shampoo felt afraid of for the first time in a very long time. She had gotten used to Ranma's 'love doesn't exist' lifestyle over the past few years and wasn't feeling very prepared to see Ranma turn around so quickly and actually talk things out.

"_Well I... shit, Harry makes this look so damned easy when he does it..."_

"_Is the great man among men Saotome Ranma admitting that he lose to boy?" _ Shampoo teased. She wanted things to get familiar again.

Her ploy worked after a fashion. He didn't think before responding. _"When it comes to talking about love and marriage and shit, then yeah. He is."_

Shampoo's eyes went wide.

"_Screw it." _ Ranma stepped up to Shampoo and thrust a small wrapped present in front of her.

"_Phones not only Christmas present?" _She tried really hard not to think about what could be that size... the exact same size as the present Usagi just opened not five minutes ago.

"_Open it. Please?"_

Shampoo unwrapped her present to find a highly polished black stone box with no hardware. It was covered in tight silver geometric patterns. Now more certain than ever of what she would find inside, Shampoo plucked the top off.

"Aiyaaaaaaa..."

Ranma still couldn't say he loved her, not that he didn't, but he's always been good with his fists and bad with his mouth. Well, Shampoo might argue that last point on a technicality... a certain use for his mouth... but that's beside the point. She new what he wanted to say but couldn't.

"Wo de airen." It had been years since Shampoo called Ranma her beloved and now she promised never to call him anything else ever again. She held out her left hand. The signal was hard to misunderstand.

Ranma plucked the ring with a line of small amethyst stones set in a smooth platinum band and slid it onto Shampoo's ring finger. There was no flash, no fireworks, but it was a momentous occasion just the same.

There was a spattering of applause coming from behind them, but neither Shampoo nor Ranma paid any attention to their witnesses.

"_So, I guess we have to decide when we-"_

"_RIGHT FUCKING NOW!" _

Shampoo was done waiting. She wanted this years ago.

"_B- but what about Granny? Won't she want to-"_

"_We send Harry to get her." _ Shampoo turned to the wizard in question. _ "You can get Great-grandmother with magic, yes?"_

Harry nodded enthusiastically from a pair of open rice paper doors. Several girls around him were giving Shampoo victory signs or thumbs up. Christmas presents and two proposals; it was turning out to be a red letter day. Harry prayed to any god listening that no Dark Lords would come by to spoil things.

* * *

-pop-

"_Hello?" _

Harry called back at the end of his international journey. He smiled as he released his passenger for the ride.

"_Well, that was interesting. I can honestly say that I've never done that in all my days, and I've seen a lot of days young man!" _ Elder Cologne cackled as she hopped away on her gnarled wooden staff.

Harry was about to tell his honored guest where everyone else was when a purple blur entered the room and tackled her Great-grandmother. What followed was a ten minute stretch of constant congratulations and happy crying between the elder and her favorite great-grandchild. Harry was surprised that Shampoo didn't turn into a cat from all the tears shed. Maybe the room wasn't cold enough.

"_Where were we? Oh, yes... I suppose I should go tell Ranma that as far as the tribe was concerned, the two of you were never not married." _ Cologne called out after Shampoo finally calmed down. _"He can make it legal here in Japan if he wants to but either way, I'm going to want to see some great-great-grandchildren soon. I'm not getting any younger!"_

Harry, Shampoo and Elder Cologne returned to the living room where most guests could still be found relaxing and eating Kentucky Fried Chicken. Introductions were made and more congratulations were spread around. Setsuna _just happened_ to have the full package of paperwork required for a local marriage license. Even Shampoo's foreign national status was taken care of. After a few signatures Ranma and Shampoo were done.

_"I'll take them in to the municipal offices tomorrow."_ Setsuna took the stack of signed-in-triplicate documents and moved them out of view. _"By this time tomorrow, Japan will recognize Shampoo as Mrs. Saotome."_

* * *

Lord Potter,

Allow me to forward the gratitude of the entire Ministry of Magic when I thank you and your ladies for saving Magical England once again during last evening's Yule Ball. Melian is particularly thankful considering that victorious dark wizards would likely demand our daughters as brides or worse. Considering the age and intelligence level of the average Death Eater, this is exactly why I choose to defend your interests.

I should also thank you personally. After your departure from the Ministry ballroom, the highest Ministry officials in attendance came together and agreed that Pius Thicknesse would be Interim Minister for Magic due to his status as DMLE Head at the time. When Pius himself brought up the topic of who should run in the emergency election, it was my name on everyone's lips! It seems, Lord Potter, that those whose opinions matter all saw how well we two worked together against that worthless bureaucrat Umbridge. Upon your departure, the Lady Potter also gave me a great boost by asking me to take care of the Ministry while you were away.

In case you didn't notice, the average pureblood loves to see an obviously powerful woman such as the Crown Princess quietly support her husband. It countered Umbridge's angry grab for power quite well. I expect the Dark Lord's support base will shrivel up and die if you continue to use the Lady Potter as a political symbol; as Luna's daughter, no self respecting pureblood would deny her wishes openly.

Please know that you have my thanks and my full support for any endeavor you may attempt in the future. Not only am I granting my daughters permission to travel to Japan this Yule Break, but if you will allow, I should like to send Melian as a chaperone. Luthien insists on following her sisters, of course.

Please respond if you are unable to accommodate a chaperone and our smallest.

With warm Yule Tidings,

Lord Damien Greengrass

Damien set his quill down and cast an ink drying charm. He folded the parchment and sealed it shut with the Greengrass House seal before turning to his personal mail owl.

"Husband dear?" Melian's voice echoed from the hall.

Damien was quite happy to hear her voice. With this last bit of parchment out of the way, we was finally ready to get some rest... or if Melian was in the mood, something a bit better than rest.

"We have guests." Damien was not happy to hear her say that, nor was he any happier to see his wife enter the study with a strange man's wand at her neck.

Death Eaters.

"Why the long face, Lord Greengrass?" The first of two men in black cloaks and white masks asked. "We are merely concerned citizens hoping to get to better know the next Minister."

"How terrible of me. Had I known we were to have visitors, I would surely have had the elves prepare something for you... perhaps the girls could have put together a recital. Daphne's quite the violinist."

"Don't worry yourself over the young ladies, my friend." The second masked man laughed in a very disturbing manner. "A few friends of ours are keeping them company. The girls will be well cared for... unless we find you to be at all disagreeable about the policies we'd like to see the next Minister for Magic put in place."

An unpleasant knot formed in Damien's stomach. The first man still had his wand raised at Melian and now he knew that his girls were in some other room with more Death Eaters. Could he kill the first man before his wife died? Could he get both of them before the others learned of his resistance? Damien saw a purple flash blink through the corridor behind his wife and uninvited guests. So they didn't plan to honor their promises, did they? Were his daughter's even in the house any longer?

He was about to ask what it was they wanted when the second man, the one who hadn't fully cleared the threshold, simply disappeared as if by portkey.

Too bad the first man noticed his inattention. He looked over his shoulder and then quickly turned his wand away from Melian.

"Avad-" Was all the man could get out before a glowing purple orb of energy passed through his stomach like it didn't exist. Seconds later, a small explosion could be heard at the far end of the hallway.

Melian shrieked and sprinted behind her husband. Just because she learned a lot of hexes for her Defense N.E.W.T. didn't mean she remembered any of them these days.

As two wands pointed towards the door and hallway beyond, the rhythmic thump of a pair of boots began to echo through the floor.

"The house is clear, girls." A woman's voice called from somewhere in the hallway.

Damien thought he had heard that voice before, but couldn't place it. Soon three sets of rapid steps thundered through the hall, passing the voice and running right up to Damien's studdy.

"Mummy!"

Luthien shrieked and threw herself at her mother. Daphne and Astoria were not far behind. Damien kept himself in control enough to remember the intruder in their hallway. Just because this person killed Death Eaters did not mean she wouldn't kill them too.

The head of an ornate jeweled staff entered the study's door followed by the staff's wielder.

"Lady Pluto!" Damien relaxed. He didn't lower his wand completely, but he did relax.

"Please excuse my entrance, Lord Greengrass. I didn't think you would want me to wait for your first guests to finish their business before I announced myself."

"No, no. That's quite alright. I see now that allowing you and the other Senshi to remain keyed into the manor wards was justified. Do you know how those men entered my home?"

"Floo travel, perhaps? Harry has remarked on more than one occasion that he believes the Floo Network Authority is compromised."

"I believe he is correct. I'll have to block my connection until the current crisis is over then."

Damien looked over his crying women, which included all four of them at this point, before looking back to the woman who must have just killed at least two men and without getting emotional about it.

"I will need to alert the aurors. Is there any way you can protect my family while I deal with these criminals?"

Setsuna seemed to consider her options. She didn't need to, of course, as there were no Jusenkyo cursed individuals anywhere near close enough to interfere with her now. After waiting an appropriate amount of time, she answered.

"I am sure Lord Potter and my Princess would insist that I help you were they to hear of your request. Still, it would be difficult to serve my sovereign in Japan and protect your family here in England. Perhaps the ladies Greengrass would consent to beginning their holiday in Japan a day or two early?"

One more quick look at his women settled the Slytherin lord's mind. His own home wasn't secure enough for his own family, but simply being near Harry certainly was.

"I have a letter that I was about to send his way. Perhaps I could amend it slightly and send it along with you?"

Pluto nodded at Lord Greengrass. It felt good for everything to go just as she knew it should. Damien would become far more powerful than he already was, but he needed to understand his position with respect to Harry and Usagi. His subordinate position. Slytherins were Slytherins after all and needed to know what their boundaries were if one expected them not to reach too far.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes:** Yay! The big Yule Ball event is finally over. Our cast of characters should get a bit of a break before once more getting into the grind of Dark Lord smashing and class teaching.

**Reviewers:**

**Jokulhaup –** I haven't take care of the remaining horcruxes yet. It's still an issue even if Dumbles never got to tell Harry about them. As for Herb... yeah, I'm not quite "Her War" but you don't need the musk to go that far for them to deserve hellfire and damnation.

**Kamen Rider Leonite –** I'm still surprised that forums get me some trafic. I guess I'm not a full alpha level fanfic otaku then.

**Twylyte –** Pluto is less interested in the caslte, or even England for that matter, as she is on how those things affect Usagi. Pluto did not need Dumbledore. She desperately needs Harry because Usagi needs Harry. Love is Usagi's greatest strength but could also be her greatest weakness if you kill the right person and she can't bring them back.

**Wonderbee31 –** Yes, not a clean win for the good guys but some justice was meted out.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** Thanks again to my most consistent reviewer. I endeavor to keep it deep and entertaining to the very end. I may sacrifice spontaneity for show and set the big finale on their wedding day. A big magical showdown on live Japanese TV! Just imagine...

**WhiteElfElder –** Nev's got Ginny in a lock, Venus is at least interested, the Patil matron and Dame Longbottom may not have been joking and now Lord Greengrass is looking to match Daphne. Is this worse for Nev or for Ginny? Let the games begin.

**Essex –** Harry most certainly will. With no Dumbledore and no Scrimgeour, Harry becomes the new Dumbledore by default.

**Jimm –** Akazukin ChaCha is the reason I am sad. All of my VHS players are crap. I've got more than a hundred anime tapes and no way to play them. ChaCha-chan is just too cute!

**Fire From Above –** Setsuna has more power and knowledge than any mere mortal deserves. As such, she isn't treated as a mortal in the story. If she didn't work tirelessly towards Usagi's utopian future, she would rule the Earth under a sexy iron heel... or there would be temples devoted to worshiping her.

**SomeGuyFawkes –** The last two chapters were too serious for me to drop in a dirty scene, but it would be just criminal if there weren't one or three before they went back to Hogwarts.

**The Wandering Soul of 1014 – **Jupiter is the only one who has really missed out, and you know Usagi doesn't like to play favorites with her closest friends. Rei may not want Harry, but Makoto sure does. Maybe it will be Makoto's turn when Luna breaks out the homemade brownies with Molly Weasley's family recipe: They're really good shit, man.

**Hanzo of the Salamander –** Thanks! Unique is what I'm trying for. Well, that and good at the same time, anyway.

**Deathless Insanity –** Here it is. Enjoy.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** Anything clashes with Voldie. As for the club, I knew there had to be one and looked for it online.

**ChronoBlade –** In the tradition of Chaos, Ranma's wedding was anticlimactic (very unlike the honeymoon of course). Perhaps Ranma's mother may insist on a wedding ceremony after the fact. It could be a good way to get a Ranma cast reunion going... or not.

**nxkris –** Youma battle? That could be fun. Maybe Harry actually goes the whole fight as Sailor Moon. On a dare? Maybe her Princess commands it for fun.


	13. Something Completely Different

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here. Special guest stars appearing from the Tenchi Muyo! universe are not mine.

Also: Their Majesties, the Emperor and Empress of Japan, the Prime Minister of Japan and the British Ambassador to Japan are real people (or so the Internet claims) and I use their real names. The odds I got their personalities right are about eleventy billion to one.

Also also: Tenchi Muyo isn't mine. It belongs to someone else. Don't be so shocked.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Thirte****en: Something Completely Different**

December 26th, 1996

A young blonde wearing full length sleeping robes and a pair of velvet slippers padded her way outside. Her trek over the well traveled floorboards of the Tendo Dojo's halls and porch this morning was silent until one step met fresh snow.

-crunch-

"Hi!"

Luthien Greengrass spun around at the surprise greeting.

"Hi… Who are you?" She asked.

Luthien spied a pink haired girl her age hovering over the fish pond on a broom.

"Daddy calls me Cuteness! What's your name?"

"I'm Lulu. Is this your mummy's house?"

As Luthien allocated one slim finger to search for crusty dragons, Cuteness giggled and shook her head.

"Nope. Just here for Christmas." Cuteness glided forward on her broom and hopped off right in front of her new friend. "Do you know how to fly a broom?"

Lulu shook her head.

"Want to learn?"

There was a short pause before the blonde slowly nodded yes.

"Great! I love flying! Daddy gave me a broom and books on flying and now I can fly and it's really fun and you can see soooo much from way up high! Come on!"

* * *

"What's that noise, Love?" Harry groaned out from his new favorite pillow: Usagi's tummy.

Her grumbly reply didn't make sense in English or Japanese. The strange noise got louder. Damn. It was making sleeping in much more difficult than it needed to be and Harry wanted to take advantage of the last late morning he got before a series of funerals would begin messing with his sleep schedule.

Harry chose to sacrifice personal comfort to satisfy curiosity and slowly got up to satisfy his curiosity. Sheets fell around him as he braved the cold of a late December morning and padded over to the bedroom window. Behind him, Usagi sat up. Covers fell to her waist; she was too sleepy to be modest. Harry opened the curtains, momentarily closing his eyes in the glare.

The noises stopped.

Harry opened his eyes. Oh, shit.

Cuteness and Lulu were floating within arm's reach of the window; faces scarlet and eyes wide with shock. Cuteness's eyes kept switching between her topless mother and fully starkers father but Lulu's gaze was locked onto Harry's...

Harry stepped back and jerked the curtains shut. "Bloody..."

"_What's wrong, my Harry?" _ Usagi noticed Harry trail off but she was too busy rubbing the sleep out of her eyes to understand why.

A big breath in... and then out again. _"I should apologize to Hermione. Giving the broom to Cuteness may have been a bad idea after all."_

Usagi just tilted her head in confusion. _ "Whatever... I'm hungry. Want some waffles and fried chicken?"_

Waffles and chicken did sound good. Maybe Harry could prove to himself that he just imagined it all after getting cleaned up. Lulu? In Tokyo? Not likely.

* * *

Lulu. In Tokyo. Shit.

"No really," Harry said, "She had a tough night, didn't she? I'd hide behind my mum's skirt too if I could."

Harry found himself standing in front of all four Greengrass ladies in the dining room downstairs. Melian held Harry's attention while her two eldest looked about the Tendo family room with interest. Luthien hid from Harry behind her mum's skirt.

"I'm sure she'll come around, Harry." Melian replied. "Might I trouble you for a tour of the house? We got in rather late and pretty much went right to sleep in the outbuilding. A rather excitable elf managed to find some beds on short notice and went back for our sleeping attire, but we still don't know where things are."

"No trouble!" Harry flashed a grin at his guests. "Let's get the important bits out of the way then. If you ladies would please follow me..."

The Greengrass ladies would clearly have to get used to the differences between their very Victorian English home and the updated-yet-traditional dojo they found themselves in. There were several glaring differences.

"There's no toilet!" Astoria squawked.

"There is. It's a traditional Asian style one. You erm... you squat over it."

A ring of scandalized British pureblood witches looked at the Tendo family facilities with concern.

"Oh!" Harry just remembered some rather important advice. "When you think you're in the right spot, take one more step forward. Important, that."

Daphne and Astoria looked at each other, faces whitening. What's next? Were they supposed to wash up before getting in the tub?

"Next, the furo! You're going to like this bit. Very relaxing." Harry turned to the next part of their tour and opened a pair of sliding wood doors off to one side. "It's important to clean up before going in for a soak, but the hot water can really loosen your muscles and wash away tension, so it's worth it."

It turns out that a lot of things were done differently on this side of the planet and the changes had little to do with the magical/non-magical split so prevalent back home.

"_Breakfast is ready!" _ Usagi called out, proudly carrying a tray laden with waffles in one hand and another holding carefully sliced sections of fried chicken in the other. She had on a cotton Hello Kitty pajama set covered by a very frilly apron that she found in the pantry.

"_We might have to set the table twice, Love."_ Harry commented as he set down plates in front of each witch. _"This table isn't big enough for everyone anymore."_

"_'Mione took Luna to the local market for some Pocky, iced coffee and a few new magazines. Ranma and Shampoo aren't up yet- or I should say that they are up but not out of bed yet."_ Usagi called after returning to the kitchen. _"Guess they're on their Honeymoon now, huh?"_

"_Just like us, Love!"_

"_Yes, yes!" She sing-songed back._

Melian and her girls sat quietly and tried to take it all in. The Chosen One and the Crown Princess of the Moon were serving them breakfast. Her Highness and a younger lunar royal introduced as 'Cuteness' were cooking. Something about Usagi being really good in Home Economics class, not that the Greengrass ladies knew what that meant either. Where did the house elf go? Maybe a discrete inquiry to Hermione later in the day would clear things up.

* * *

Ginny opened her eyes.

She, Ron and Neville had all landed in an outdoor courtyard with a light covering of snow around a small pond. In front of her stood a two story wooden building unlike any other she'd ever seen before.

"Bloody hell. Why did Harry drop us off outside then?" Ron complained as he shivered in the cold.

Ginny pulled out her wand.

"Oi! Don't get us in trouble!" Ron barked.

Ginny only glared at him and cast a warming charm on herself. "Did you forget already, Ron? There are no restrictions on doing magic here."

"Oh. Right."

Ron pulled his wand out and followed his sister's lead. Neville was already dressed warm enough to stay as he was. Before the three of them could get into any mischief, one of the rice paper doors in front of them slid open.

"Come in, come in you three!" Harry called out. "Shoes will have to come off, mind you. I'll find some indoor slippers for you…"

pop

"Dobby has slippers for Harry Potter Sir's friends!" Dobby summoned three pairs of slippers before turning on Harry. "And why did Harry Potter Sir not call for Dobby or Kreacher to being making breakfast this morning? Is Dobby's cooking no longer good enough for Harry Potter Sir?"

"No, no. Dobby, that's not it at all." Harry held up his hands in a warding gesture. "You should have seen how happy Usagi was to get back in a kitchen again."

"Dobby spends morning chasing pixies out of Harry Potter Sir's island home while his Princess labors in kitchen? The shame!"

Before Harry could defend Usagi's domesticity, Dobby –pop-'d out of view.

"Eeeeeee!" _**Crash!**_

Harry, Neville and the two youngest Weasleys all listened quietly as a house-elf and a Crown Princess began to fight each other for control of the kitchen. A high pitched giggle from the same direction told them what a little girl thought about the argument.

"I really don't think Dobby knows how to make sushi rolls." Harry started again, "Anyway, have you three had breakfast? Might as well get some food in you before I show you around town."

* * *

Deep in the heart of Tokyo, a small egg lying forgotten and unused these past few years was about to be disturbed. The seed was originally hidden halfway down a back alley in preparation for an ambush that never happened. Kaolinite lost this particular creation of Professor Tomoe long before Mistress 9 awakened, and it has lain dormant ever since. The evil seed sat behind a succession of dumpsters and trash cans day after day until finally one local employee felt enough pride in his job that he would clean even the rocks and grime from behind his employer's newest restaurant for the grand opening.

"_This alley is disgusting!"_ Konatsu exclaimed to no one in particular_. "Ukyo-sama will be so impressed at my cleaning efforts that she will finally, finally, finally... __**finally **__stop obsessing over Ranma and get on with her life!"_

Konatsu failed to see the irony in that statement. The love challenged cross-dressing genius kunoichi set down his bucket full of cleaning supplies and put on a pair of heavy rubber gloves. After smoothing out his skirt (and checking his makeup) he began grabbing random bits of refuse off of the ground and chucking them into a trash can. Eventually, Konatsu made it all the way to the abandoned daimon seed.

As soon he picked the seed up, it awakened. Dark power surged out of the seed and up Konatsu's arms before the kunoichi could even register a threat. By the time he realized that something was wrong, it was already too late to escape. A sentience forged in the darkness of Professor Tomoe's lab fed off of Konatsu's spirit and took control of his body. He went slack.

The young man's face, still 'cute' in that bishonen way he never quite lost through maturity, began to shift from healthy looking to a waxy reddish complexion. Expertly curled lashes and light blue eyeshadow became highly pronounced against the new flesh tone. A modest swell filled out his chest, one that would have pleased the boy had he been conscious of what was happening. The silver lining to this possession was that all daimons were female. Konatsu had lived as a girl all his life, and though he was smitten with Ukyo, actually having girl parts would have made him much more content.

The daimon growled in glee for being active after such a long time.

Behind the newly born daimon, Ucchan's back door opened.

"_Hey, Kon-chan! The new girl needs help taking orders up front. What are you do-"_

There was a time when Kuonji Ukyo could fight Shampoo to a standstill, back when the girls fought over Ranma's affections day in and day out. That time was years ago and the okonomiyaki chef was a little rusty these days. Rusty, and she never expected her most loyal and devoted employee to turn into a monster and attack her.

With a scream, the daimon kunoichi spun in place and released a cloud of ropes at her target. Ukyo stood there dumbfounded as rope coiled around her body, pinning her arms against her sides and binding her ankles tight.

"_Hrrmmmph!"_ A ball gag materialized in her mouth.

_**THUMP**_

"_Your heart will finally belong to me!" _ Perhaps the daimon got more than just a physical body from Konatsu after all.

A black beam of energy shot from the monster and struck Ukyo in the chest. All of Ukyo's passion, her burning need to be the best okonomiyaki chef she could be was sucked out of her in the shape of a Pure Heart Crystal.

* * *

"_Ah, there it is."_ Nabiki looked across the street at her lunch destination.

She wasn't usually the kind to eat someplace new but then she was getting a week of free lunches for her and her crew out of the deal in exchange for an on screen name drop… and it _was_ Ukyo's new place… so she felt like making an exception this time. Still, since her magical girl interview just shot Nabiki's popularity through the roof, maybe she could squeeze Ukyo for a little more than just a few free meals.

As she waited for the light to change, something odd happened. Two young girls opened the Ucchan's door and tried to run away. At first, Nabiki thought she was just watching a couple of kids try to skip out on their check until she saw the girls' faces. Sheer terror. Right before the two could make a break for it, ropes shot out through the door and bound one of them tight. She was slowly dragged back inside. The other one, a girl with exotic light blue hair and pink eyes screamed like a demon was biting her and ran into a nearby alley.

Experience led Nabiki to laying odds on that one being magical or an alien or both.

She pulled out her cell phone.

"_Hey, Kaji."_ Nabiki paused. _"No, we're not going somewhere else; pull the van up. Yes, there's a story. Yes, hurry up. See you in five."_

Nabiki quickly dialed another number after ending the call to her tech.

"_Hey, Ranma-baby.__ I didn't know you'd still be- No! Don't hang up!" _The reporter had to hold her phone away from her ear for a moment to let Ranma calm down. _"Believe it or not, I'd like to report a monster sighting to Sailor Moon if she's still at the dojo. I caught it early. Yesssss, it's a real one. Get here quick enough and she'll be able to save the day and everything. Meet me in Ginza, two two eighteen... it's the new Ucchan's location. That's right, your dear friend Ucchan just opened a new place only to have it overrun by monsters. Tooddles!"_

Nabiki put away her cell phone and waited. Her next big magical girl story was just about to happen and all she had to do was stand there and look pretty.

Maybe she wouldn't have to wait so long? A young girl with two long streamers of light blue hair, a frilly dress and an over the top scepter-ish looking thing in her hands rushed up to Ucchan's door and opened it wide.

"_Misa-chan! I'm coming!"_ The girl shouted into the darkened restaurant beyond.

"_Who do you think you're kidding?"_ Nabiki muttered to herself, _"I clearly remember you running out just minutes ago. Your costume sucks, kid."_

"_My name is Pretty Sammy and in the name of fr- __**ack!**__"_

The girl calling herself Pretty Sammy didn't even get to finish her intro speech before another mass of ropes shot out of the darkness and engulfed her. One coil of rope snaked around her all the way from ankle to ass while a second started at her wrists and spun up both arms, stopping just short of Pretty Sammy's shoulders. The would-be heroine wanted to yell that such an early attack wasn't fair, but then it's hard to complain when your mouth is full of napkins.

Good thing Nabiki got the word out to Sailor Moon when she did. This is right up the girl's alley.

* * *

"_Yo! Usagi!" _ Ranma yelled from another room, _"Can you come here?"_

Usagi looked at Harry for a moment before shrugging her shoulders and moving to see what Ranma wanted. They were both confused about the slightly off tone in the ki-master's voice but neither worried overmuch.

The Moon Princess disappeared around a door jamb leaving Harry to turn his head back to the crowd of pureblood magicals around him. Every one of them was staring at the family room television with rapt attention. Even Lady Greengrass. Even Luna. None of them had ever seen a gameshow before, let alone a Japanese gameshow involving scantily clad young women contorting themselves to fit through odd holes in a moving wall to make it to the other side.

"Your foot! Turn your knee a bit more!"

Ginny shouted instructions to each contestant in turn. It didn't matter that she didn't speak Japanese or that the people inside the black box couldn't hear her anyway. She was hooked. So was her brother… Ron hadn't stopped drooling since the contestants were introduced.

One pureblood was missing. Cuteness abducted Luthien early on in the telly watching phase of the day go up to Nabiki's old room and listen to CD's on her stereo system. Little Lulu was getting introduced to J-pop and boy bands. Squee.

"Moon Crisis, makeup!" Usagi shouted from the next room over.

That got more attention. Harry stood up immediately, as did Hermione and Ron. In the rush to stand, Ron dropped his soda (loads better than pumpkin juice in his eyes) and gave Harry a magic sex change. Others began to get up even as a blonde Harry jogged into the next room.

"… _so we need to rush over! ...What do you mean 'I don't know where that is'? Whatever, just follow Mercury in. Moon out!"_ Harry stopped just in time to see Sailor Moon close her communicator and turn around. "Hey, guys! Who want to go kick monster ass?"

Ron raised his hand immediately. Others soon followed.

* * *

Sailor Mercury stood upon a third story balcony and scanned Ucchan's from across the street and two storefronts down. To her right, Sailor Mars visually searched the streets and rooftops around their perch for signs of approaching allies. Behind the two, Venus and Jupiter were pouring over a girls magazine with a twelve page spread on Usagi's return and public reveal. It was quality control, for the record. Gotta check these magazines for spin, right? The full page image of Harry carrying a distraught Usagi out for a mid-interview break was pretty steamy what with how it made Usagi look extra vulnerable and made Harry look extra beefcake.

"_Hey guys, what's up?"_ Sailor Moon's voice caused Sailor Mars to look up in surprise. Straight up.

Harry and a silver haired Sailor Moon (Bandai is going to love this, ka-ching!) were riding tandem on his Firebolt. Immediately above and behind them were Hermione and Shampoo on one broom with Luna and Ranma next in line. Other brooms and their riders were just coming into view as they dove into the cityscape from above. Moon and Harry dismounted.

Mercury spoke up_. "I'm detecting a daimon inside the restaurant two doors down on the other side of the street. Ucchan's. It seems to be a remnant of forces we've dealt with before… possibly created by Professor Tomoe __before we assaulted__ Mugen Gakuen__."_

"_Hostages?"_ Harry asked.

"_There appear to be nearly one hundred unmoving humans inside the building… and one more unidentified energy source which I haven't encountered before. Right as I showed up, a police officer got too close to the front doors and ropes of some sort shot out and caught him, dragging him inside."_ Mercury looked up from the micro-computer in her hands. _"The police just finished clearing this block and the media was here before I arrived. We'll be on camera from start to finish this time."_

"_No pressure then, huh?"_ Sailor Moon giggled. _"Not that this creep should be any trouble after everything we've fought before."_

"_How about I just go down there, step inside and break the thing in half?"_ Ranma was getting antsy. His best friend… well, former best friend anyway… was in there and he wanted ol' Ucchan out of harm's way yesterday.

"_That's not a good idea." _Mars stopped Ranma from jumping to the ground below with a hand on his shoulder. _"A daimon wouldn't think twice about using the people in there against us. And we don't want to break it in half. There's an innocent person in there somewhere and Sailor Moon will exorcize the evil from his body."_

"_And I don't want to smash up the building if I don't have too. I like okonomiyaki a lot and I refuse to smash up a perfectly good restaurant!"_ Sailor Moon absently ran her hand over her stomach while thinking about thankful business owners and free meals for life. Mmmmmmmm. _"Ideas? Anyone?"_

"_We need to get it out of the restaurant."_ Jupiter offered. If they went inside, she would tear the place up just like Ranma.

"_Can we set a trap for it?"_ Hermione asked. Sitting in the background doing nothing just wasn't working for the Gryffindor witch. The other Gryffindors were getting rather fidgety on their brooms as well.

"_Sure, but who gets to be bait?"_ Jupiter returned.

Ranma smiled.

* * *

The being once called Konatsu looked down at the little girl struggling before it.

Technically, its primary function was already complete. Daimons were originally designed to take Pure Heart Crystals and follow their master's orders. This daimon already plenty of crystals... but there was no master around to give it further instructions apart from repeating step one. Sure, step three was 'profit', but there seemed to be no step two today.

"_You taste different to my senses. Perhaps your Heart Crystal will yield a sweet reward?" _ The girl who identified herself as 'Pretty Sammy' moaned into her napkin-gag at the daimon's threat.

Just as the daimon was about to call on its powers to rip Pretty Sammy's Pure Heart Crystal out of her chest, a wave of raw life energy washed through the building. The daimon looked up hungrily.

"_Surely my master would want a Pure Heart Crystal from __**that**__ human." _ Ignoring the crying would-be heroine on the floor, it stalked forward.

Outside, Sailor Moon watched as Ranma and Shampoo stood in the middle of an abandoned street. Above them, a group of broom riding wizards and witches were casting an ever-widening pattern of muggle-repellers and magical traps just in case the police present couldn't hold crowds back. Across the street from Ucchan's, the Senshi were deployed in two groups. Moon and her Inner Senshi were immediately across the street in a loose line. The Outer Senshi (less Setsuna who didn't answer the call) held themselves in reserve on the balcony that Moon and Mercury first occupied. Chibi-Moon was in the air next to her Daddy and Hermione today though she did wear her Senshi uniform under her favorite cloak.

The Greengrass ladies remained at the Tendo Dojo. Melian absolutely refused to let her babies risk themselves, not that the girls were feeling at all courageous... just a little curious. Lulu didn't want her new friend Cuteness to play a new game without her.

Ropes shot out of the restaurant entry door at the ki master. They missed.

"_That the best you got, pussy?" _

Ranma smacked her ass and blew a raspberry. Her female body may be weaker and smaller than her male one but it had speed aplenty.

Ropes shot out of the door twice more in a failed bid to catch the redheaded aquatransexual. Two more attacks aiming to drag Shampoo into the building failed. That's right Mister Bad Guy. If you want this, you have to come outside to get it.

After another minute, a form began to emerge from the depths of Ucchan's. The trap was working.

"_Woah, Konatsu-chan! It's been a while! How's Ucchan these days?" _ The ki-master addressed the exposed daimon. _"And what's with the red facepaint? You look like some Kabukicho whore."_

Ranma continued to taunt the possessed kunoichi. She didn't know how much of Konatsu's skill the monster in front of him got to keep, but to Ranma's senses the magically cloaked broomriders sneaking in behind Konatsu were dangerously exposed.

Why were two broomriders being so Gryffindor as to be almost within arm's reach of today's baddie? They were silently casting unbreakable charms and locking charms on the Ucchan's storefront. Mercury assured them that there was only one bad guy today after a thorough scan of the area. It may not yet be safe enough for a rescue attempt, but they could keep the daimon out of Ucchan's too.

The spells were set. Magically speaking, the daimon was in a closed box now unless it could fly. Next was casting spells against the monster itself. Unfortuantely, Neville couldn't get 'Incarcerous' off completely silently and the daimon heard something behind it.

"Warrrrgggh!" The daimon spun and shot a stream of ropes towards Neville before his incantation was done.

Surprised he fell off his broom and landed on his right shoulder, wand falling to the wayside. Almost immediately, three red bolts from stunning spells shot towards the daimon. Now alerted to its predicament, the daimon dodged every spell as well as two ki balls. The attack still served its primary purpose; the other cloaked broomrider was thirty meters down range before he had enough self control to spin his broom around and continue the fight.

"Accio Neville's shirt!" Harry called from his new safer position.

As the hog tied wizard was pulled to safety by invisible hands, two martial artists closed to engage the enemy.

Harry motioned for the broomriders to pull back as not to spell the wrong target now that Ranma and Shampoo were getting up close and personal with the daimon. The beast did indeed keep some of Konatsu's skill with a bit more speed added on for good measure; the three of them were little more than blurs to anyone else.

Sailor Moon and the other Senshi had waited long enough. This diamon was in their home territory and they'd fought these things before. Moon gave her girls the signal to start their offensive.

"Mercury Aqua Mist!"

The shout caused scores of civilian witnesses to cheer in support, though Nabiki and her boys cursed. You can't film through a dense fog.

"_Ranma! Shampoo! Please fall back!" _

Unlike with their advantage over wizarding barriers, the ki users were as susceptible to Mercury's mist as anyone else. Ranma and Shampoo both moved back as well as they could after losing sight of the daimon and each other. Shampoo was especially wary of turning into a little cat mid-fight due to cold mists. Soon, the daimon was standing alone in the middle of a thick fog bank, confused. Its original programming was short on adaptability.

"Venus Love-Me Chain!"

Golden glowing links flowed around the daimon and pulled its arms against its sides. Mercury's mist began to dissipate.

If this were a normal daimon, Moon would pull out the big guns right here and finish things but the daimon had one last trick to play that came from manifesting in such a highly trained ninja. It brought both hands together and formed a series of seals with its fingers.

"_Duplicating Body Technique!"_ The daimon yelled.

Ranma cursed from the sidelines and sped forward again. He had heard about Konatsu having a technique like this, but the kunoichi never seemed serious enough to use it before. Of course the damn monster would use it.

Venus's eyes began to widen as four copies of the daimon she had tied up appeared beside the first. Each of them noted the direction her chain pointed into the mist and released a barrage of throwing knives. Just as Venus was about to become a human pincushion, Ranma appeared between her and the cloud of steel blades.

_T-T-T-T-T-T-TAK-TAK-TAK-TAK_

Ranma's hands became a blur as he caught each and every knife thrown at Venus. Venus was too shocked to do anything but blink repeatedly.

"Jupiter Oak Evolution!" Jupiter had enough.

A pair of energy balls raced over the street immediately blasting two of the extra daimons out of existence. A third exploded when a ki ball tore through its chest. At least the clones seemed marginally slower than the original.

While the last daimon clone did manage to evade a ki ball of its own, it backed right into an Impedimentia Jinx. Shampoo's foot found and destroyed it a half second later. Ranma spied the original daimon trying to perform its hand seals again and grabbed its hands.

"_Ranma! You might want to get out of the way!" _ Sailor Moon called. It was grand finale time.

"_No way. She'll just make more clones again! You're just gonna use that white moon magic, right?" _ The redhead called back. Sailor Moon nodded. _"Come on, Moon. Hit me!"_

Moon looked towards Mercury with a troubled expression. Mercury pointed her computer in Ranma's direction and did her best to answer Moon's silent question with a quick scan.

"The Kaleidomoon Scope can and will clear the daimon from its victim. Ranma will be safe from harm." Sailor Moon nodded to Mercury. She didn't think someone like Ranma could be harmed by her high end magics, but she also didn't want to risk a spectacular mistake without a second opinion.

The last vapors of Mercury's mist dissipated. Every Senshi, wizard, witch and martial artist were now visible to the world at large. And it was the world at large... Nabiki and her crew weren't the only news team on station anymore and the crowd must have grown by several thousand in the past few minutes. Well... it was lunch time and street traffic was high. Getting a crowd of several thousand was easy in Ginza under most circumstances.

Showtime. Sailor Moon drew back and prepared for her attack, silver hair trailing behind her in shiny, eye catching streamers. Then she lunged forward.

"MOON GORGEOUS MEDITATION!" Sailor Moon unleashed her most potent focused spell right into Ranma and the possessed kunoichi.

The attack manifested just as it always had before, a thick beam of prismatic energy heading unerringly towards the target of Moon's ire. Due to the size of the beam, Ranma caught just as much of it as Konatsu did.

In the crowd behind the action, several people cried out at what looked like a bad case of friendly fire.

As the attack subsided, the destroyed daimon egg fell free of Konatsu's right hand and the male kunoichi fell onto his own backside.

"_Woah..." _ Ranma stumbled off to one side before putting her hands on her knees and starting a deep breathing exercise.

"_A-Airen?" _Shampoo asked nervously.

"_I'm fine. Really. Better than that actually. I feel great!" _

Ranma punctuated that sentence with a surprise snog for Shampoo right in the middle of the street in full view of anyone watching.

"_Shampoo. You may need to keep Ranma out of trouble for a day or two."_ Mercury warned the purple haired Amazon after using her Mercury Computer to run a scan on the redhead.

"_Why? Moon beam not as innocent as you thought it would be?"_

"_It wasn't harmful, I promise!"_ Mercury didn't like the look in Shampoo's eye. It meant pain for anyone who harmed her man. _"Your husband (Shampoo had to grin when the Senshi called Ranma that) was hit with a purifying, love based magical beam. __H__i- her __life force and body are supercharged.__ Y__ou should expect her to be __**very**__ fertile and affectionate for hours… maybe days."_

Shampoo rather liked hearing this news.

"_Unless the two of you are planning on becoming parents sometime soon, you should be extra careful for a while."_

"_We are always careful."_

Venus walked up next to Mercury and looked over her shoulder at the palm sized supercomputer_. "Perhaps you should use two condoms at the same time… __or have him put it __somewhere else__?"_

Mercury went scarlet at Venus's suggestion while Shampoo seemed to consider things. The Amazon leaned in closer to Venus.

"_Do not make my husband any offers, little girl." _

Venus paled and backed away. In truth, her close call with the knives really turned her on something fierce, but Shampoo's throaty growl was an excellent mood killer. As Shampoo turned to deal with an increasingly horny female husband, the combined international magical rescue coalition converged on Konatsu and Ucchan's.

Ron and Neville undid the spellwork on the Ucchan's front door allowing the Senshi and other magicals to stream in. Once inside, the girls began to perform a task they had plenty of experience in doing before… returning Pure Heart Crystals to their owners. It would take time for all of the victims to recover, but they would eventually.

There was one victim that would need to be handled differently from the others…

"_Moon! Over here!" _Mars called out.

One bound young girl had been conscious the whole time… and bawling her eyes out for most of it. As Moon stepped up followed closely by Harry, Mars pulled a ball of napkins out of the light blue haired would-be heroine's mouth.

"_Tennnnchiiiiiiiiii! –hic- Big sister! I'm scared!"_ Pretty Sammy continued to cry as Harry pulled a wand out and magically undid her bindings.

Usagi pulled the girl into a tight hug and began to reassure her that it was over and that she would be with her Tenchi and her big sister as soon as the Senshi could find them. Chibi-Moon came up behind the young magical girl and hugged her from behind. While staring at the odd display of silver, light blue and pink hair in front of him, Harry collected his thoughts and looked over to his group to see how things were going. The wizards and witches were done unbinding victims and were now using magic to clean up the dining room.

Daimon attacks can be messy affairs when the victims try to get away.

"Hey, Gin. 'Mione. Could you go outside and drop the muggle repellers? We should let the locals back in." The witches looked back at Harry and nodded. On her way out, Gin snagged Neville's hand and pulled him outside with her. The more the merrier, yeah? Ron's eyes narrowed and he followed the others out. Luna picked up Pretty Sammy's discarded scepter and began to study it intently. She wanted to make one of her own just like it.

Usagi's stomach growled.

"_Hey, hun."_ An unsteady voice called out from behind her. _"I don't know why I feel like crap or why my restaurant is full of magical girls, but if you want something to eat then you came to the right place. For you, today's lunch is on the house… what do you say?"_

Kuonji Ukyo just made a friend for life. Sailor Moon looked over the menu board.

"_I'll have two Ran-chan specials with extra sauce, please!" _

Things were going to be okay. After learning that Sailor Moon was serious about her two Ran-chan specials, Harry apparated over to the dojo to collect the Greengrass ladies and bring them back to Ginza for lunch. Soon, the whole Senshi-wizarding party was sitting down to eat.

Ucchan's may have to eat one lunch rush without full compensation, but if the crowds and the news crews outside were any indication then getting attacked by a daimon was the best kind of advertising money could buy. If Ukyo saw her ex-fiancé Ranma and ex-rival Shampoo enter Ucchan's arm in arm, she didn't show it. The shock of this morning's excitement left her with just enough control to get Konatsu up and moving again so that Ukyo herself could get behind the grill. She could deal with ex-fiancés after the magical girl lunch rush was over.

Tenchi and big sister Ayeka showed up halfway through lunch to pull Sasami 'Pretty Sammy' Jurai aside to fuss over her and deliver a stern lecture on calling for help and not scaring her big sister half to death. Yes, Jurai. Yes, Sasami and her family were the very same aliens Pluto said would help evacuate the Earth if the worst case scenario ever came to pass. She's even a princess, just like Cuteness, and has the potential to grow into a very powerful young woman one day. Eventually, Tenchi and Ayeka calmed down enough to let Sasami have some lunch with the Senshi.

Harry and Usagi introduced themselves to the Juraians to be hospitable and to find out more about this alien empire Pluto mentioned the other night. Tenchi once thought he was a normal boy only to discover fate had it in for him in epic fashion. That sounds familiar, doesn't it? He started amassing a rather impressive collection of exotic, powerful and opinionated females in short order. That sounds familiar twice. Tenchi was apparently one quarter Juraian (on his mother's side) but still royal enough to be considered the odds on favorite for Emperor when his great-grandfather steps down. Okay, so Harry was marrying into an alien royal line whose influence was restricted to a single star system… pretty damn good by local standards even if the Juraian royal family runs a galaxy spanning space empire which makes the Silver Millennium look tiny in comparison.

Tenchi and his girls were invited to the wedding, of course.

Upon discovering another girl that was both centuries older than she looked **and** would likely live many thousands of years longer, Cuteness immediately started giving Sasami pointers on how to be a magical girl without getting killed- or worse, _grounded_. Seeing that curiosity was eating Lulu alive, Harry took pity on the girl and let her borrow his translator ring. After a quick thank you hug, she slid around to where Cuteness and Sasami were sitting and joined the magical girl training program.

* * *

"…_today in Ginza when the Senshi and Sailor Moon's new English allies came to the rescue of a younger magical girl that had stepped in over her head…"_

Setsuna continued to sample a bottle of wine from her rather extensive collection as she watched Nabiki's special report on prime time news. She originally wanted to watch through the Gate, but there were three Jusenkyo victims involved, so all she got was static. Setsuna was forced to watch from afar and then look for Miss Tendo's report to air that evening. If the Senshi of Time and Space wanted to keep any kind of control over events as they unfolded from here on out, it was obvious that she would have to spend more time involved in the day to day activities of her Princess and her Princess's chosen court. Very well… it was always a foregone conclusion that she would do exactly that one day, but the Gate historically pointed to her switch from part time to full time participant as being sometime after Sailor Moon's next great enemy rather than before. This was the penalty for allowing not just one but three Jusenkyo cursed people to have daily interactions with her future Queen. It couldn't be helped.

At least she could still make adjustments to the players even if the future was less clear and the Gate was keeping more secrets from her. The alien princess Pretty Sammy was a good example and one that Setsuna was quite proud of.

Sasami Jurai was a difficult girl to influence if for no other reason than the obscene number of high-powered alien sensor arrays that one of her housemates managed to pack into local space as well as several nearby sub-space pocket dimensions. As a result, Sasami was most vuler- err... _accessible_ when she went out on weekly shopping trips. A little Senshi sleight of hand later and Sasami 'accidentally' purchased a magical girl fan magazine rather than the cooking journal she originally wanted.

Setsuna just sat back and watched from that point as Sasami Jurai became a rabid Senshi fan and then begged for a magical girl costume for Christmas. As one of her close family friends (the super-scientist one who owned all of those sub-space pocket dimensions) felt that a fake magical girl outfit was way too boring, little Sasami got her very own genuine magical girl uniform complete with energy-beam absorbing silk, silly bows, girlie-girl hair ornaments and one fully functioning Juraian power focus set inside of a faux magical scepter.

Luckily, Setsuna was able to get even closer when the Juraian Princess took a trip with one of her close school friends into Ginza for the day. A little nudge here and there led to Sasami just barely escaping the daimon's first grab when they went for lunch at Ucchan's. Equally as important, Pretty Sammy was too new at the whole 'saving people' thing to call for help and she was also too slow to pull the trigger on that scepter of hers. Sasami needs to learn how to use that thing before she ends up killing someone intends to save.

Nabiki _just happened_ to be in the area and _just happened_ to know how to get the word out to Sailor Moon when little Pretty Sammy got her first failing grade in Magical Girl School. Coincidence? Not likely.

The Senshi of Pluto let out a huge breath of relief when Ranma stepped in to save Venus from a very painful near death experience. That was unexpected. It's also what you get when you try to control the flow of time when Jusenkyo's local influence is too high.

In the end, it all worked out for the best. Harry and Usagi met the future Juraian Royal Family under very favorable conditions. This ensures a friendly relationship with alien royals who could make Usagi's planet hopping dreams much easier to achieve. Sasami now sees Sailor Moon as a role model and Cuteness as a friend and equal. These were good indicators for the future. Yes, it was time for Setsuna to take a more active, day to day role in things than she had before. She picked up her phone and dialed a number.

The phone rang twice before someone picked up. _"Hello, Mamoru… No, no. There is no Senshi emergency. I __don't need to wait for the world to be on the edge of collapse to call you, do I?"_

Setsuna looked at the open bottle of wine in front of her and silently considered which vintage would be a better match for the rest of her evening.

"_You're absolutely right, Mamoru. Usagi and Harry are looking to make some pretty big changes and I'm going to need your assistance in smoothing out some details that teenagers can't be bothered to consider. Just you and me- Usagi and Harry promised to attend some funerals back in England and the first one will be starting in an hour. Harry's Divination Professor. No, she didn't see it coming. Perhaps we can discuss things at your place tonight? I'll bring the wine..."_ Setsuna smiled impishly at his response. _"I knew you'd say that. No, Mamoru I haven't been using the Gate just to stalk you… I've been using the Gate to stalk __**everyone**__. It's my job, you know."_

Setsuna concluded her phone call with the Prince of Earth with a bit of small talk, a few kind words and a promise to be at his door in ten minutes. She smiled to herself. She could knock on his door while still on the phone but timing was important. Make him wait.

If Setsuna was finally going to step out of the wings and take a front line position, she would have to get her hands dirty, right? Chiba Mamoru was about to learn that when Meioh Setsuna chose to get her hands dirty, she got them very, very dirty.

* * *

Two slender hands slowly worked their way through a selection of album covers. They were old and worn, but they had just what she was looking for. One record was singled out for a closer inspection before being set down on an antique record player. The speed was set and a needle carefully lowered onto pressed vinyl.

Myrtle Merryweather backed away and began to sway her hips as the first track on a big band record started.

"Oh honey…" The Ravenclaw sang along, "Picture me upon your knee, with tea for two and two for tea…"

"I see you found Gran's records." Her boyfriend called out as he leaned against a door jamb and watched her dance.

"Yes! Thank you very much for pointing them out earlier!"

A long curtain of black hair fanned out behind the witch as she spun in circles. After spending fifty years with the same twin tails, that one small change felt heavenly. And then for Christmas- for Christmas, Mister and Misses Creevey took Myrtle into town and got her some contact lenses! Oh, she felt like a completely different person already!

Today, the Creevey family was spending time with their family patriarch in the old family home up near Thames Head. There was a time when the whole family (save Grandad and his brothers) waited out the London Blitz here in the countryside.

"I love it here. Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with your house… but being here just reminds me so much of my old home." The ex-ghost bumped up against the back of a straight backed chair, giggled and continued dancing. She _was_ getting better about that.

"I don't doubt it." Colin replied, eyes firmly locked on Myrtle's lower half. He could care less how many times she forgot that walls were solid as long as he got to help her get back up each time she bounced off of one. "Grandad hasn't changed a thing here since he first got married. Even the boiler is old… you have to stoke the fires by hand if you want any hot water."

"And the stove is a wood burning one too. I learned how to cook on one just like it."

Myrtle finished her dance as the track stopped.

"So she has an ear for fine music and knows how to cook, eh?" Colin's Grandad spoke up, having just come up from the cellar with a fresh bottle of whiskey. "She's looking more and more like your Gran, God bless her soul. Now if only she'd get this old man a clean glass then I can leave you two alone 'till your Mum has supper ready."

"Yes, sir." "Yes, Grandad." The two teens replied.

Unfortunately, Myrtle didn't think things all the way through. She remembered right where the glasses were kept in the next room over, but she had a bit of a relapse as to how best to move between rooms.

**THUMP**

"Myrtle!" Colin ran over to the girl who had one hand on the wall and one covering her nose. Walls were not for walking through.

Grandad just shook his head. "The eye doctor got her prescription wrong, Colin. I'll tell your father to take her back again in the morning."

As the old man went to get his own whiskey glass, two teens began to laugh.

* * *

POP

Kreacher appeared in the middle of the Tendo Dojo and shuddered. He had been given what was supposed to be a simple task by Lord Potter. Get a copy of the Prophet and check up on all of Master's friends and acquaintances in England. It sounded easy... and really should have been except for one thing. Some things, once seen, cannot be unseen.

The two slick, sweaty rutting humans never even noticed a house elf POP into the next room over at their flat. Not expecting visitors, Tonks and Moony hadn't even made it as far as the bedroom before going hard core.

As the magical servant reached out for a copy of the Daily Prophet sitting on Moony's kitchen table, he heard the metamorph yell 'Who's a bad wolfie? You are!' and looked up. Through a doorway into the living room, he spied a pink haired red-riding-hooded girl pinned to the floor by The Big Bad Wolf.

Would Master want to be informed of their activities? Kreacher hoped not.

Once the paper was secure, the house elf POP'd out again. Lord Potter never actually said that Kreacher had to pay for the paper, did he?

ALBUS DUMBLEDORE LAID TO REST

By Terry Nesbitt-Pepperpot

Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Grand Sorcerer, Order of Merlin - First Class, Headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Supreme Mugwump of the International Confederation of Wizards and Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot was laid to rest on Hogwarts grounds yesterday in a ceremony that was attended by wizards and witches from across the United Kingdom as well as dozens of representatives from I.C.W. member nations.

While the Wizarding World is still recovering from the night he was brutally murdered within Hogwarts walls along side Professor of Divination, Sibyll Trelawney and four unidentified students. The attack by dark wizards coincided with an attack on the Ministry Yule Ball in which Minister Rufus Scrimgeour and thirteen other ball attendees died at the hands of He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named and two dozen of his followers. The Chosen One, Lord Harry James Potter and his Lady, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity Potter were able to prevent the Dark Lord from capturing and enslaving Wizarding Britain's upper crust en mass.

At the funeral, a somber congregation listened to eulogies by Interim Minister Pius Thicknesse, Professor Griselda Marchbanks and Lord Harry James Potter among others. Lord Potter surprised many by speaking warmly of Dumbledore's tireless dedication to light causes. Many expected the Chosen One to use the occasion to criticize his Headmaster and former Magical Guardian yet he did nothing of the sort. Crown Princess Usagi followed her husband's example and extolled the virtues of Love, which Dumbledore considered to be the controvercial 'power he knows not' of prophecy. The Moon Princess asked everyone present to believe in Love as Albus Dumbledore did.

As official proceedings drew to a close, a phoenix, thought to be Dumbledore's familiar Fawkes, flashed above the crowds, sang notes of sadness and comfort before flashing away to parts unkown. Wizards and witches of every social caste and background remained for hours after the funeral was officially over, waiting in line for as long as two hours to pay their last respects at the foot of Albus Dumbledore's monument. The monument, built directly against the castle wall, was erected at the very spot where Albus fell in magical combat when a portion of the Headmaster's tower collapsed with him inside. Lord Potter himself repaired much of the tower and what remained of the broken stone and timbers he could not return were used to entomb a wizard many claim was the greatest man to be born on these isles since Merlin himself.

For more on Black Christmas, see page 2.

For more on the state of the Ministry and Hogwarts, see page 5.

For more on Crown Princess Potter, Mortal or Divine?, see pages 3 thru 5.

* * *

"_Good morning, Your Highness!"_ Setsuna's seemed rather chipper this morning.

Usagi thought it was too early, herself. It felt like she had just barely gotten any sleep at all last night before hearing the green haired woman's call. Usagi let out a snort or two followed by some incoherent mumbling as she slowly fell to the Sandman's influence once again.

"_Why, Your Highness..."_ Setsuna seemed to gently scold, _"How can you be so unprepared for your own wedding? Up! Wake up!"_

Crown Princess Sleepyhead groaned and rolled over. Why was she alone in bed? What was that annoying woman talking about?

"_I understand, Your Highness. It was a big surprise to all of us… such a big change… but you did the right thing yesterday and now Crystal Tokyo is guaranteed."_

Setsuna must have opened the curtains because more light entered the room. Ugh. What happened yesterday, anyway?

"_You should clean yourself up now, my Princess, and get a bath as soon as possible…"_ Footsteps seemed to move away from the window on a path back to the bedroom door. _"… mustn't keep your groom waiting at the altar."_

"_Unngg –snort- married… soooo soooonnn?"_

"_I know, but you were quite insistent last night. Thank you, Your Highness. The sacrifices you make for the good of the future will not be forgotten_." The footsteps paused right about where the door should be. _ "Congratulations, Misses Ronald Bilius Weasley!"_

_**SLAM!**_

Usagi shot up in bed, eyes wide.

"_NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O!"_

Downstairs, several people flinched at the sound of Ultimate Suffering.

As a panicky Harry -pop- went to save his Princess Buttercup, Prince Humperd- er, Setsuna Meioh hopped downstairs and into the family room. Setsuna counted half a dozen witches staring at her. "I'm sure she'll find it was just a horrible nightmare."

She looked a bit like Gred and Forge after a particularly difficult prank succeeded beyond their wildest expectations. Ginny smiled. The redhead may not have been the one to make Usagi scream like that, but she felt loads better about her summer and fall now that someone got the Moon Princess good.

"Soooooo… How long until breakfast is ready?" Setsuna inquired to no-one in particular. She could afford to not-know-everything for another half hour before her talents would be called into play elsewhere.

POP

"Dobby be making breakfast to order, Miss. What does Miss wish to have?"

You see? She didn't know that would happen and the world isn't crashing down around her. How novel.

* * *

January 3rd, 1997

"_You still haven't told me how it went with the twins." _ Usagi muttered as she batted her eyelashes at the mirror, looking for a flaw in her makeup to correct. She looked back at her mother, who gave her a thumbs up. Putting on a formal kimono was not easy.

Beside Usagi, Ami was pulling her obi into proper alignment. To the other side, Daphne and Melian were subjecting Hermione to that most heinous form of torture set aside for traditional European women's fashion- the corset. The sacrifices one made for a meeting with the Emperor of Japan.

"_Nothing happened! Fred and George just wanted my advice on a few of their projects. Harry helped me get to their shop in Diagon Alley. We talked shop for an hour or two. They showed me how to travel by floo. We had lunch at their mother's house. I met Mister and Misses Weasley as well as their older brother Percy. We went back to the shop. Harry brought the three of us back for the party and we celebrated the New Year with you. That's all there is to it." _ Ami sounded perfectly at ease, but there was a hint of blush under her makeup.

"_Did Molly hug you? Was her hug painfully tight?"_ Hermione broke into the conversation once her pureblood handmaidens for the night were done robbing her of breath.

Behind her, Melian smoothed out the formal dress robes Hermione could now shimmy into. Daphne moved her wand up to spell a complicated braid pattern into the Gryffindor witch's hair. Hermione may not be pureblood, but she was representing Magical England today and they wanted her to look her very best. All three English witches were wearing enchanted jade hoop earrings and were thus able to follow The Inquisition.

"_She hugged me but not tightly. What would that mean?"_

"_Hmmm."_ Hermione paused_. "She usually goes to extremes. Misses Weasley smothers family and those she considers family… I think she envisioned Harry and I joining her family through marriages to Ginny and Ron. I got bruises from her coddling last Christmas. On the other hand, Molly practically ignores Fleur Delacour in spite of the fact that Fleur is engaged to Bill, the oldest Weasley son."_

"_I may not be part of Molly's social circle, dears,"_ Melian offered, "_but I have seen her meet and greet along Diagon Alley over the years. It's always one extreme or the other with her."_

"_She did comment on how polite and quiet I was. She didn't expect that from any girl Fred and George would bring home. I think she felt safe that there was only one of me… It's not like they're going to share a girlfriend."_

Hermione took a moment from surveying the lotions and makeup options Daphne had out. _"That's actually the kind of thing I would expect from them. Ever the pranksters, bringing one girl home instead of two... and I've never seen them show any witch in Hogwarts the kind of respect they show you, Ami. They didn't even consider pranking you once."_

Usagi had a giggle fit as Ami blushed almost hard enough for her cheeks to match her lipstick.

With only five minutes to go before a limo from the Imperial Household Agency was scheduled to arrive, the girls finally made their way to the living room in full regalia. Melian and Ikuko came down first; the Tokyo mother had a digital camera in hand.

Harry knew the girls were going formal thus his own choice to wear his formal black robes from the Yule Ball, _after_ fixing the battle damage, of course. While he did consider all three girls to be quite stunning, he simply did not know what was about to come around the corner.

"Oh, Sweet Merlin... I must be dreaming." Harry was doing quite well, all things considered. He was able to speak without picking his jaw up off the floor. Sailor Pluto stood beside him, Garnet Rod in hand. Cuteness and Lulu both sat on the floor with scorecards and fat black markers.

Ami's kimono was a work of art, a sea scape in silk with stylized cresting waves crashing back and forth in lighter and lighter shades of blue as they progressed from toe to collar. Her obi was navy blue with narrow silver chords near the top and bottom edges. A pair of silver enchanted kanzashi pulled her hair into flowing blue waves rolling around a tight bun. With all of the blue around them, Ami's bright red lips were almost as hypnotic as her softly glowing sigil.

Pluto assured everyone that between Ami's elaborate formal wear and a light application of Mercury Power, they would not have to worry about her identity being discovered.

Ikuko's flash went off. Cuteness gave Ami a ten. Lulu, a five out of five. Harry gave her a compliment nice enough to burn her cheeks yet again.

A witch stepped up beside Ami.

"Daphne, when is OH MY GOD!" It wasn't Daphne that Harry saw enter the room even if it was the kind of dress you might expect a pureblood socialite to wear in good company.

More flashes. Cuteness held up another ten. Lulu gave six out of five with a small note stating 'Mummy does good work.'

Hermione's skirt was an elaborate series of rose colored satin and white lace ridges pulled into a long ribbon at the small of her back. Smooth satin and rich velvet coiled tightly around her waist which seemed quite a bit narrower than he remembered it ever being before. The rose tinted fabrics gave way to pure white lace from just above her chest to a high neck line with matching lace at her wrists. Hermione was also wearing a Greengrass family heirloom, a cameo of Queen Luna of the Moon over a soft pink background. Her hair was a pulled into a series of braids and loose ringlets which Harry had already seen Daphne wear on more than one occasion, thus the confusion.

"'Mione? Is that really you?"

Ami and Hermione looked at each other and sighed. They both owed Usagi five hundred yen after her bold declaration that Harry would need proof that Hermione was really Hermione and not a secret Greengrass sibling come out of hiding.

"Honestly, Harry. Do I really look all that different?" She huffed, or rather she tried to. The whalebone corset was really making things difficult for her. No wonder girls used to faint regularly.

"Hermione, dear. You look every bit the pureblood princess... a Victorian goddess in that dress. You make me feel common in comparison." That was the effect that Daphne and Melian wanted and it worked marvelously.

Harry heard more footsteps approaching and turned his head. Okay, _there_ was Daphne and with her was... was...

"..."

Flash, flash, flash, flash... Lulu's sign read 'Lots!' Cuteness claimed over nine thousand.

"_Bunny! Oh, you make me so proud!" _ Ikuko had to stop taking pictures so she could get a handkerchief out and take care of those pesky tears.

Setsuna may have assisted in Ami's search for a good kimono, but she ordered this one custom for her Crown Princess a long time ago. Above and below a bright red cherry blossom patterned obi was a silk field of gold, yellow, blue, white and pink in such a dense pattern that it was nearly fractal in detail. Pluto had to go back in time to get this one hand stitched by a true master of the craft… after she personally stitched an example of a pattern she once saw Queen Tranquility wearing a long time ago in a ballroom far, far away. Ruby red lips and a golden moon sigil sat high up on a pedestal as Usagi's silver tresses were pulled and twisted above the neck in their entirety. A pair of golden kanzashi did the impossible by channeling her hair into a wide bow resting on top of a bun which supported chin length bangs in the front and dozens of narrow looped braids to the rear.

Harry couldn't find the either his jaw or the words to describe what he felt.

After a few dozen more shots of her precious Bunny were taken, Ikuko turned the camera on Harry. Speechless? Sure, but his was a good face to have when words failed.

"_I think you broke him."_ Cuteness stage whispered to her Momma.

Giggles rippled through the room.

"_Is, um... is the makeup mess resistant?" _ Harry managed to squeak out.

"_Of course it is."_ Melian replied. The Ravenclaw really, really liked her new earrings. _"Her makeup and dress are spelled against damage so heavily now that she could take a cutting curse in the face and not get a scratch!"_

Harry took two quick steps forward and pulled his Love into a deep kiss.

Flash, flash, flash, flash... Lulu's sign showed thirteen out of seven, a magically powerful combination. Cuteness's sign now had a fat panda holding its own sign proclaiming 'Now the schools will finally be joined!'

The front door bell rang.

"_Your Highness," _ Pluto spoke up, _"the limo is here. It is time to meet the Emperor."_

_

* * *

_

Harry made another visual sweep of the room with his eyes. He and the girls were sitting on one side of a long banquet table in the Imperial Residence. Tea with the Emperor; until a few minutes ago, the occasion had been as stiff and formal as Harry expected it to be.

While Aunt Petunia was almost always stiff and formal during those rare occasions when Harry was permitted to help her entertain, that was about the only detail that he could relate to past experiences. Aunt Petunia and Uncle Vernon worked hard to put up a front of wealth and influence when they had neither.

Their Majesties, the Emperor and Empress of Japan worked hard to set aside their positions once protocol allowed and began to dote on Usagi and Ami as if they were favored grandchildren. Emperor Akihito then turned to Harry and explained how he expected the young Lord to treat Usagi lest there be a reckoning in the future. Before Usagi could come to his defense, Harry swore a magically binding oath to love and honor Usagi for as long as he lived.

Harry's use of magic opened the door to a discussion of avatars like Moon and Mercury and how they differed from the wizards and witches that Harry and Hermione represented today. Harry gave a brief explanation of how every witch and wizard had a magical core and how genetics seemed to play a role even though magic was known to simply appear in normal bloodlines, Miss Granger being a good example of the latter. Empress Michiko asked if any studies were underway looking for recessive genetic markers related to magical cores.

For the first time that day, the subject of the magical-muggle separation was breached.

"_So the Inquisition was after genuine witches from the beginning? That does put European history under a new light."_ Emperor Akihito mused.

"_If only the light weren't so dim, Sir."_ Harry added, now comfortable enough that he hardly remembered his host was an Emperor. _"Since the secrecy statutes were enacted, the magical population of England has made no attempts to study the impact separation has on either population. The Wizarding World is completely divorced of the non-wizarding world as far as I can tell. Well… I take that back. There must be at least some way for the Ministry of Magic to interact with muggle England or Sirius Black would never have never become the subject of a nationwide manhunt."_

"_Are you suggesting, Lord Potter, that the separation has done more harm than good?" _The Empress asked.

Harry caught her use of titles and vowed to pay more attention to his own speech. _"I believe it has, Your Majesty. One need only look at the lives saved by our beloved Senshi to see the impact even a handful of magically capable people can have on the world. Wizards and witches may not have the same power as Sailor Moon or Sailor Mercury, but they number in the tens and hundreds of thousands when you only have nine Senshi… or ten if you include the Senshi in training Chibi-Moon."_

"_Eleven, my love. Don't forget yourself!"_ Usagi and Ami giggled as Harry's face flushed.

"_But are you so sure that these wizards will use their powers for the benefit of mankind once the magical and non-magical worlds are re-introduced?" _Emperor Akihito does make for a good devil's advocate, something that Harry will never get out of Usagi. For that matter, Hermione is also prone to ignore constructive criticism when she's up on her pulpit.

"_That right there is one of the best reasons for magicals to study non-magical world history. Wizarding England is fully two centuries behind their own neighbors at all levels of society and technology. Why I doubt even half of my classmates at Hogwarts realize that modern man has set foot on the Moon, and did so before my generation was born." _Harry's been borrowing Hermione's pulpit a bit more often recently. Having the President of S.P.E.W. and Sailor Moon as his two closest confidants has certainly made its mark on him.

"_We are not suggesting that the schism be repaired overnight." _ Ami added. _"As evidenced by Japan's own troubled industrialization and the upheaval of the nineteen forties, it's clear that the modern world must be very careful when making connections to a society that is so radically different from itself in so many ways. We don't claim to have the solution yet. We __**are**__ willing to put our best effort into finding that solution."_

Since Usagi's welcome home party, the Senshi of Mercury has been spending less time pondering the mysteries of physics and biology and more time considering politics and human behavior. Her short term conclusion is that far more research and planning needs to be done.

"_You wish to make the world a better place for the greater good of all mankind." _

Whether the Emperor was setting a verbal trap or not, Harry had felt more than enough heartache due to those words to ignore them.

"_That phrase needs to be clearly defined ahead of time. Headmaster Dumbledore was willing to let terrible things happen to me and Usagi both, all for the Greater Good. I never did get to ask him what he thought the Greater Good was supposed to be."_

"_You have an excellent point, Lord Potter." The elder ruler looked to his wife who nodded slightly in his direction. A decision was made. "Michiko and I believe that your ideals are to be commended, and if anyone can achieve them certainly you will. Crown Princess Serenity… Lord Potter… I offer you my support and the support of my family in achieving your destiny. Even if you need only the ear of an old man who understands what it means to deal with politicians day in and day out. Perhaps now we should invite Prime M__inist__e__r Nakasone and__ Amb__assad__or Sir Wright in__to th__e discussion?"_

Harry and the ladies soon learned that meeting the Imperial couple first was about the best thing that could have happened. While Minister Nakasone did initially thank Sailor Moon and Sailor Mercury for their service to Japan, he quickly switched to backhanded compliments when the few reporters invited were sent away. He also made several oblique criticisms of vigilantism and delinquency while completely ignoring the British magicals present. At least he was more polite about it than Snape was in Hogsmeade. Ambassador Sir Wright's problem involved two British Subjects suddenly popping up in Japan after completely vanishing between primary and secondary school. Harry wasn't sure at first, but the man seemed to think he had found evidence of an international cult. With permission from Their Majesties, Harry and Hermione put on a magical demonstration that left Akihito and Michiko giddy (under their reserved countenances, of course), Nakasone unsettled and Ambassador Sir Wright thinking that the sky might actually be green after all. A quick apparation to Sir Wright's childhood home to nip a bottle of single malt scotch and bring it back to Japan in less than ten minutes was a rather impressive feat by any measure. With the shock of magic being real after all, he wasn't the least bit ready to discuss magical terror cells and secret Ministries. He did promise to report back to Her Majesty the Queen Mum and recommend an audience with Lord Potter and Miss Granger.

All that time Hermione spent preparing defenses for their future plans regarding something akin to world or interplanetary conquest was wasted. Bother. At least by the end of the meeting only one person in four wanted to burn them at the stake. Harry and Usagi could work with a seventy-five percent approval rating.

Of course, the Imperial family was invited to Usagi's wedding. Michiko promised to bring the entire clan with her. It was possible that Prime Minster Nakasone's invitation might get lost in the mail or something.

By the time four magical teens said their goodbyes to Akihito and Michiko, Usagi absolutely refused to return to the dojo. She was high on life and wearing the most gorgeous kimono she'd ever laid eyes on. Usagi retrieved her Senshi communicator and called all her girls together. They were hitting Asakusa to celebrate the holidays and she wasn't taking no for an answer. Yes, wear your uniforms. No, Ami, keep your kimono on. Yes, bring Usagi's family and Harry's friends... and Ranma and Shampoo as well if you can pry them off each other. In that limo, Usagi really felt like a Crown Princess and she did not want it to end. By Royal Decree, it would continue at least for one evening of public fun, friends and family. Even better, Pluto didn't try to shut her down... instead she changed into the Moon Kingdom equivalent of a Little Black Dress and invited Tuxedo Mask to meet them for dinner.

Thank Merlin for muggle repellers and notice-me-nots as they would be vital for crowd control.

Let the spectacle begin.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes: ** And another chapter passes in which neither Makoto nor Luna find a way into Harry's bed. Blame it on the depressing events of Black Christmas and the a need to rest and recoup.

My flower girl list now includes Cuteness, Luthien, Gabrielle and Sasami. That's a lot of uber-cute little girls.

**Reviewers:**

**ariel stormcloud; Hanzo of the Salamander; god of all; SomeGuyFawkes; The Bellmaker; boomwarrior13 – **Thank you for reviewing.

**Deathless Insanity – **Cuteness's change was reversed when Setsuna got the time stream back on track (mostly). Santa didn't get Voldemort what he wanted for Christmas, so the Dork Lard will sit and stew for a bit before making his next fiendish move. He might just survive long enough to attend the wedding after all.

**Fire From Above –** Culture shock indeed. If I were into writing those super detailed plotless chapters that some authors get off on, then I would need another 20-40k words for Luna and the Greengrass women reacting to Japan. As I do eventually want to finish this story, I can't do that.

**Twylyte – **And a bit more politics. I figure even if the Emperor wasn't being genuine to Usagi (tho I like to think he was), the Imperial family would want to network with Crown Princess Sailor Moon. I expect Setsuna and Mamoru will lead the political charge, not Usagi and Harry.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** No specific elements, huh? I'm gonna have to try harder then.

**Soraskage Sama –** Herb done the deed.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows –** The alt-Cuteness upset Pluto enough for her to want to do something about the Juraians. Now, if worst comes to worst, the Juraians would at least show Usagi and her daughter a bit more respect for having saved Sasami before.

**ChronoBlade – **Even at it's most specific point, the prophecy is open to interpretation. Harry has plenty of powers Voldie knows shit about and he could easily appoint someone to be his 'right hand' for a nasty task. I want Voldie to understand just how big the universe is and just how powerful some non-wizarding sentients are right before he gets his ticket punched.

**Cloud Dancer1014 –** I haven't forgotten Makoto, she's just the victim of bad timing. What I had planned for a New Year's Eve party is getting pushed back to the Going Back to England party. She might get hers next chapter.

**WhiteElfElder –** I'm not setting Nev up with a harem, but he's now got more than one girl interested in him. Pluto, Uranus and Neptune are always portrayed as the more violently aggressive Senshi where the Inners are the more defensive love-conquers-all types. I bet that if you portray Pluto from certain perspectives or with a bit of spin then she could be a rather effective Dark Lady.

**Wonderbee31 –** Ranma may still be forced to appear before an altar... his mother may demand it. Having Nodoka show up at the Dojo in a snit about Ranma being in town and not saying 'hi' could be good for next chapter.

**nate –** Yes, Nev has options, but he won't be saying yes to all of them. He strikes me as a one woman kind of man. In school, I had spelling/grammar problems. Four hundred thousand words of fanfiction did more to fix that than all the years I went to school/college combined. Go for it.

**Lerris –** I'll look into that archive. Never heard of it before.

**jgkitarel –** Umbridge is an evil bitch. Luckily, she only thrives when the system is tolerant of her crap. Thicknesse doesn't like her and Damien likes her even less. Her days are numbered.

**TrowGundam –** You could call it a background plot thread – make as many anime and manga character sets real at the same time as possible while not overloading the system. I may or may not have Skuld, Goddess of the Future, give Pluto a stern talking to at some point. Pluto's been shitting all over mankind's free will, hasn't she?

**cross-over-lover232 –** I'm doing Veela and Violence alternately by chapters. Each story gets updated on average once a month although I always hope to speed it up a bit more. It's about time I do another future scene isn't it? The final epilogue will definitely be in the distant future, just like the one in Girl Who Loved.


	14. Just Suck It

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

...as seen previously on Violence Inherent in the System...

_In that limo, Usagi really felt like a Crown Princess and she did not want it to end. By Royal Decree, it would continue at least for one evening of public fun, friends and family. Even better, Pluto didn't try to shut her down... instead she changed into the Moon Kingdom equivalent of a Little Black Dress and invited Tuxedo Mask to meet them for dinner._

_Thank Merlin for muggle repellers and notice-me-nots as they would be vital for crowd control._

_Let the spectacle begin._

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Fourteen****: Just Suck It**

January 5th, 1997

"_Pleeeeaase, Momma. Take me with you!"_ Princess Usagi Cuteness-Potter sobbed onto Sailor Moon's shoulder. Hot tears soaked into a ribbon of silver hair as the pink haired girl's fists pulled on enchanted uniform trim in an effort to hug her Momma tighter.

They had just finished a large going away dinner. The other English magicals all took portkeys out of the Tendo Dojo courtyard from evening in Japan to morning in England just a few minutes ago. Ranma and Shampoo went back on Luna's portkey.

The mahou shoujo mother looked up at her husband, who was also Sailor Moon at the moment, and tried to hold back her tears. The small magical family was surrounded by a further ring of transformed Senshi who were themselves trying not to get too emotional over the heart rending scene. Just off to one side, Hermione was trying to control her own emotions by mentally reviewing her knowledge of potions ingredients. It _–sniff-_ almost worked.

"_I really wish we could… I love you sooooo much…." _Sailor Moon got out before she had to calm down and stop her own voice from wavering_. "but… but England is still too dangerous for you. I'll- I'll still come visit during the week an- and you'll visit Harry on weekends when we don't have to worry about classes and stuff."_

"_Do not worry, sweet Princess. I promise you will not go more than three days without seeing your mother and not more than five for your father." _Pluto put a hand on the nine hundred years young girl to calm her down. _"Things may yet change enough that you spend more time in England and not less."_

"_You're slipping, Pluto."_ Moon half joked_. "You just made it sound like you don't know every second of every day from now 'till Crystal Tokyo is founded."_

"_I will admit that the time stream is more turbulent now than it has been in a long time, Your Highness," _ Pluto locked gazes with her surprised sovereign, _"but the stream still moves in the same direction as before."_

"_As long as you don't pull another 'Misses Weasley' prank on me, I think we'll do just fine. Right, girls?"_ Sailor Moon called out.

Every Senshi called, laughed or grunted in the affirmative. Their Crown Princess giggled in response.

"_Okay."_ With great reluctance, Sailor Moon slowly started to separate herself from the pink haired girl crying on her shoulder. _"Pluto. Saturn. Neptune. Uranus. I trust you to take very good care of her while I'm away."_

Four Senshi bowed deeply as one. Though Cuteness would always love the Inner Senshi, the Outers were like having a sister and three extra mothers. The little princess would also spend time with Grandmother Ikuko though security now dictated that she spend all of her time outside of school with other Senshi nearby. It was a bizarre family dynamic but it worked.

When Pluto took Cuteness's hand, the pinkette spun quickly and latched herself to the older Senshi's waist.

"_Mercury. Mars. Jupiter. I'll be seeing you on and off throughout the week…"_ And Moon would. With a little help from Pluto, there would always be a uniformed Senshi by her side while she was in England. _"Venus. You're on the clock today."_

As Moon went around to have her personal last minute farewells with each Senshi, Harry stepped back to the pile of luggage near Hermione. Two house elves were discretely summoned to carry two school trunks and seven large muggle suitcases plus a garment bag straight to the castle. Guess what luggage belonged to who.

Ikuko and Kenji were still not pleased to see their little baby running off to England so soon but a promise to be back often and a last minute family bonding shopping spree for travel supplies did soften the blow. Usagi even promised to sleep in her old room overnight once a week. Without her fiance even.

Finally, all preparations were over and everything that needed saying was said.

"_Okay –sniff- okay." _ Moon called. "Harry. Ready?"

The blonde Sailor Moon nodded. Two Sailor Moons held a fist out towards each other and on silent agreement began shaking them up and down together. On the third shake down, each Senshi's fist switched to a symbol.

"_Rock beats scissors!"_ The blonde Moon crowed. _"We are apparating in!"_

Her fiancée/wife pouted. That didn't keep one Sailor Moon from reversing her transformation back into Harry Potter. Hermione took this as her cue to come forward.

"I thought you wouldn't want to apparate. You never seem to like doing it." Hermione said.

"_I just don't want to pop into the middle of Platform Nine and Three-quarters as a Senshi, alright? I'll wear the uniform when I need to but that doesn't make it any less embarrassing, you know?"_ Harry pulled out a wand and began to charm her eyes red and hair pink.

"_But you're still going as a girl?" _ Uranus challenged. Score one for the gender-issues crowd.

"_There's nothing wrong with being a girl!"_ Harry cried defiantly as she put on her green Oakleys and ran two enchanted kanzashi into her hair.

Just about every natural born girl listening smiled at that. Harry was one of the few boys they knew that could say something like that and have it not be part of a plan to get laid. That is exactly why it _would_ get Harry laid.

"_It's just being a frilly, bow covered girlie-girl that sets me on edge. I think you really do need the right genes for that and I don't have them."_ Well, maybe it wouldn't get her laid, but she was still ahead of the game.

Pluto looked Harry in the eyes and pointed with her right index finger to her left wrist. Got it. Time to go.

Harry in her Heather Snape guise quickly hopped over and kissed Cuteness on the top of her head, adding a few quite whispers of love in just for her. Usagi ran the risk of not wanting to let go and did the same thing. With a final set of wordless waves, four very magical girls pulled tight together and apparated away.

-pop-

* * *

POP

"Headmistress McGonagall. A message from the Ministry."

Minerva looked up from her desk. It wasn't Albus's desk, not much of anything inside the tower survived that night. Sure, most of the stonework was reset in the original design but for some details, Harry was unable to replicate furnishings and artifacts and... the old Headmasters portraits were gone. It was a minor miracle that allowed the Sorting Hat to catch a wind current and fall out of the way of tumbling debris. Thank Merlin for small favors.

She opened the message and dismissed the house elf who delivered it.

POP

After reading the official cover letter twice and quickly reviewing the attached documents, she sighed and poured herself a stiff Scotch.

"Albus. Would you have done it?" She asked to the only portrait currently hanging on her office wall. Unfortunately, the magical representation of Headmaster Dumbledore was still asleep in his frame. "I just don't know, Albus. All I can do is try."

She took a kerchief to her eyes before knocking back the drink and standing up.

"It's all or nothing, this time. How many times did you have to deal with this dilemma so close to the opening feast? Well, I am a Gryffindor, am I not? At least I have the Minister's full support in this plan, something you could never really claim to have my dear friend."

The old witch set down her empty glass, picked up the Ministry documents and made for her office door. She had much to do before the Express arrived.

* * *

-pop-

Four girls pulled out of their embrace and quickly scanned the area for any sign of danger. The Hogwarts express was as red and shiny as ever before. Unlike before, the platform was mostly vacant. There were only a dozen or so other people on the platform and half of them appeared to be aurors. Perhaps they came in before the rush?

"Harry!"

The pink haired shades wearing teen turned at hearing her name called by tone of the aurors. There were now two witches on the platform with pink hair.

"Wotcher, Harry!" Tonks came up to hug the witch, but Venus stepped in between them.

"No can do, honey. I'd be in deep doodoo if someone got by and ran off with the hot piece of ass behind me." Venus said.

Tonks held up her open hands. "I understand. You needn't worry today, though. A couple of chaps that don't exist working for that department we didn't fight Death Eaters in came by and installed a set of wards that only allows inbound apparation and portkeys until after the Express starts moving. I didn't just say that and we never had this conversation. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink."

"You know for a fact that they work?" Harry countered.

A pair of fingers came up to Nymphadora's forehead in a half-assed salute. "Scout's honor! I checked them myself not half an hour ago."

"Everybody's staring now." Harry sighed. "Should we just get a compartment and watch for people we know to show up or should we brave the staring masses and be all social like?"

"Ohh! Can we stay outside please, Harry? I do all the talking if you want." Sailor Moon bounced on the balls of her feet energetically.

As Harry internally struggled with the idea of staying out in the open on purpose versus disappointing Usagi, a small –pop- was heard and a family appeared on the platform not far away. The family consisted of a middle aged couple and two younger witches of Hogwarts age. Of the two girls, one looked to be an upper year, perhaps seventh, and the other looked like she was about as small as they come.

"Oh!" Moon's eyebrows shot up. "It's that kid! That Slytherin First Year you making teacher's pet in Defense class. I want to go say hi to- errrrrr… what her name again?"

"Annabelle?" Harry asked Hermione. She nodded. "That's right. Annabelle White. And she is _not_ teacher's pet."

At that moment, young Miss White looked around the platform, quickly noticing the older witches and mahou shoujo looking pointedly back at her. Her sharp Hermione-esque mental facilities quickly deduced who the pink haired shades wearing witch must really be and blushed heavily before staring at her shoes. Her parents and sister all noted this and looked over to Harry's group. Six eyes widened in recognition.

"Oh, she is so teacher's pet with a side of crush." Venus was starting to realize that guard duty could be a pretty cool gig to have.

"Come on!" Sailor Moon shouted before trotting over to the now Weasley red ickle firstie and her increasingly star struck parents.

"Good morning, Annabelle! Remember me?" The Senshi of Love and Justice sing-songed her greeting.

Annabelle looked up just long enough to see Moon's bright smile shining right at her. Her Defense Professors and another Senshi were coming up behind the happy silver haired Crown Princess. Teacher's pet blushed harder now that she had the full attention of four of the most famous teens in the Wizarding World while her family was present.

"Good morning."

Harry turned from the obviously embarrassed young Slytherin to greet her parents. While they were indeed star struck, both of the Whites were able to pull through and have a respectable conversation with Harry and then Hermione about their 'Little Annie' and her top-of-her-class grades. Eventually, one minor detail got to Hermione and she just had to do something about it.

"I'm sorry," she addressed Annabelle's older sister, "I know we've been going to Hogwarts together for years now but we've never been introduced."

The older sister in question was sporting a rather smug grin on her face and had been for the whole of the conversation so far.

"Claribelle White, Professor Granger. Don't worry, we've never been in the same classroom before as I'm a Seventh Year Slytherin." Claribelle offered. "It's nice to finally meet Potter and some of his ladies socially."

She turned to Harry and continued, "And good work getting rid of the glasses, Potter. You really have the most incredible eyes when your not dying them pink. They must help you tremendously in your snorkack hunts."

Snorkacks? What?

"Sorry, what was that about snorkacks? I'm afraid I don't know much about the creatures." Harry asked.

In fact, both she and Hermione were quite shocked that anyone would so casually reference snorkacks aside from Luna. The older White sister's smug grin became even more smug. Really, she was looking like a cross between a gossip laden Lav-Lav and a prank planning Forge. They may have to watch out for this one in the future…

"Oh, Professor Potter! I suppose you haven't seen the Witch Weekly special edition that just came out this morning then. What a shame. I know it's not a very wizard thing to do, but you really should read this one."

It was then Harry noticed for the first time that Claribelle had a thick glossy magazine tucked under her left arm. Something in that magazine had this Slytherin witch grinning like the kneazle that ate the canary and she really should find out what before showing her face in the Great Hall again. She looked around, but didn't see a news stand anywhere on the platform. The next time she glanced back at the magazine under Claribelle's arm, the Slytherin noticed.

"I suppose you are better in tune with your feminine side than most wizards- I tell you what…." She held aloft the Witch Weekly in question. There on the cover was a surprisingly good image of Harry snogging Usagi in Asakusa only two days ago. "You can borrow my copy while on the Express as long as you and Lady Potter both sign the front cover. Interested?"

Claribelle may have been showing her Slytherin leanings, but Harry wasn't about to refuse. She nodded her approval and took the offered magazine.

After a few more minutes of small talk, Harry, Hermione and the two Senshi made their excuses and stepped away from the White family and a terminally embarrassed Annabelle. As soon as the older teens walked away, two more First Year girls ran over to Annabelle and began a round of squee laced gossip.

The rest of platform Nine and three-quarters was beginning to fill up and more students they knew were appearing. While her fuku was fine for fighting monsters it wasn't something she wanted to spend all day wearing. Usagi de-transformed into a cute jeans and sweater outfit that made socializing much less awkward.

Minutes later, Lav-Lav and Pav-Pav spotted their team lieutenant and Luna. There were squeals and hugs all around as plans for the next Gryffindor Cheerleader team practice were discussed with as much devotion as Oliver Wood ever had for his quidditch team. Usagi so needed a uniform. Lav-Lav and Pav-Pav both giggled over some cryptic comment involving Harry, wrackspurts and snorkacks that went right over Harry's head. Have they been spending more time with Luna than she knew about?

Harry and Hermione were both surprised with the sheer number of students and parents that came up to them. Both felt like being more involved suited their roles as Assistant Professors, but they seemed to forget all of the other things that drew the masses in. Many, many people wanted to talk to Lord and Lady Potter just as they had at the Yule Ball. Venus did her job and ran crowd control until a cue formed to talk to her specifically. Soon, retreating onto the Express became their only reasonable option.

Honestly. You'd think that all of those people had never personally met the Chosen One and the Crown Princess of the Moon before... well when you put it that way...

There was no Malfoy today, thus there was no need for a cheesy speech in front of witnesses like what happened last time they boarded the Express.

"Bugger."

"Language Harry." Hermione reprimanded.

"But we've got too many friends to fit in a single compartment now... " Harry complained from behind her Oakleys as she scanned the group following her lead through train compartments.

There was herself and 'Mione... Usagi and Venus... Ranma and Shampoo both arrived with Luna... Nev, Ginny and Ron who all came in together as well... and Daphne and Astoria both seemed to slip into the group unchallenged though those two did spend more time mixing on the fringes. That's two compartments worth of student, easy.

"Just vanish a dividing wall and-"

"Ron! We will not desecrate the Hogwarts Express in such a hideous manner!" Hermione seemed not to like his idea.

Several other students were about to – gasp- chime in in support of Ron's idea when a deep full voice swept over the group from behind.

"I have just the thing!" Professor Horace Slughorn began to make his way through the crowd to Harry. "Harry, my boy! Ah, and I see you're playing tricks this time too!"

Slughorn expertly wove his rotund way through the friends and students and up to the pink haired Potter, giving small complements and greetings to everyone as he passed them.

"Of course, if you can match what you did last time, I may choose to look the other way. Those Weasley twins and their shop do real quality work, don't they?" The richly clothed wizard finally made his way to Harry and gave the witch a friendly pat on the shoulder. "But I didn't interrupt for such small matters, no. In fact, I know of a private party car at the head of the train... one that you get to by passing through the Prefect's meeting space. I could have made use of it myself last time but I felt like mixing with the students."

"Thank you, Sir," Harry returned, "but that sounds like a V.I.P. space or something. I couldn't-"

Slughorn snorted. "My Lord Potter! That car should have been made available to you the very first time you stepped aboard. And have you forgotten who you married? Why, no common cabin on this train is worthy of a Crown Princess. And it's _Horace_, Harry."

Red faced, Harry continued. "Horace. What of my friends?"

Horace didn't even need to look through the crowd. Keeping track of people was his thing.

"A few of them rate access to this car without you, Harry. And those that don't are with you and that makes all the difference."

Harry narrowed his eyes a touch. Keeping everyone together sounded grand... but he was no Malfoy.

"And if I wanted anyone else to be able to walk in and out? No bouncer at the door, as it were?"

Slughorn nodded eagerly.

"Keeping your social options open! Excellent idea, Harry. Just what I would have done in your place!" The old Potions Master turned to lead Harry and his entourage up to the head passenger car. "Mind you, circulation will get cut off for an hour or so when the Prefects meet, but that can't be helped. Besides, we have around us an Assistant Professor, an Assistant Professor who is also a Prefect, two Prefects and two school employees all of whom would be welcome at the Prefects Meeting which starts in a half-hour or so."

Confused, Hermione had to ask a question, "Professor? You said two Prefects. That would be Ron and... who else?"

Slughorn grinned and looked at one of his own. "Did you forget to tell them, Miss Greengrass?"

Daphne went a bit red in the face before getting control of herself. Slughorn continued.

"With the shameful acts of young Lord Malfoy and his partner Miss Parkinson, I and the Headmistress agreed that Daphne here should be given the Prefect badge for your year."

"What about the wizard Prefect? Is it Zabini?" Harry inquired. _Headmistress?_ Did that mean what he thought it meant?

"You didn't notice, did you?" Horace's smile slipped for a moment. "Mister Zabini was the one who cast an unforgivable on your delightful escort here-" The old man gestured to Venus. "and failed during the Yule Ball. He is currently awaiting trial and will not be invited to return to Hogwarts even if he does sneak his way out of Ministry control."

Well... things were a bit hectic right at the beginning and Venus did thump her attacker pretty well before Harry got to see the boy's face. Oh, dear Merlin. Please don't say that Crabbe or Goyle got the position.

"This will be the first time in over a century that a year group of Slytherins go without a male prefect, but certain performance standards must be met..." Horace slipped a little closer to Harry as they walked along the corridors. "You didn't hear it from me, but I expect Head Girl Chang to ask you to patrol with Miss Greengrass. You may not be a Prefect, but you are an Assistant Professor and in most cases that puts you above Prefects in the hierarchy."

Harry looked over back at Daphne. She didn't react to the pinkette's curious glance with anything more than a quick wink as she was deep in a debate about ancient runes with Luna and whether or not any of the runes they studied in class could be old enough to have come from the Silver Millennium. Actually, that sounded like a fine question to Harry.

Professor Slughorn led his group into the Prefect's meeting space which was supposedly the last space before they reached the V.I.P. Car. This car was different from any that Harry had used before in that at least half of the car was a single open space with bench seating and a few padded chairs at one end. With two Prefects from each class Fifth Year and up plus the two Head students, they certainly needed the space. As Slughorn and his train of special guests stepped through, a pair of surprised Hufflepuff prefects pulled back from their interrupted snog.

"Don't mind us." Harry consoled on his way past.

"I knew it!" Usagi crowed. "I saw you two making goo-goo eyes at each other all last year. Lav-Lav owes me ten sickles!"

"Ah, to be young again..." Horace started up again as he opened the last door between himself an the supposed V.I.P. car. "Almost there, Harry. I believe this cart fell out of style after the big events of Nineteen eighty-one. Being part of the elite fell out of fashion for a few years..."

It was a beautiful car indeed, not that it mattered to Harry, but there were a few appreciative comments behind him as he looked for a place to sit. Oh, look... a love seat. Brilliant.

Harry pulled a surprised and suddenly giggling Usagi onto his lap.

"_Love," _Harry said over Usagi's happiness, _"I believe those two Prefects had the right idea." _

He turned to briefly address the others around him.

"If the rest of you lot would please look the other way for a few minutes, Usagi and I need to verify whether this is indeed a love seat or not. Thank you." With laughter erupting all around them, Harry and Usagi proceeded to test the furniture with an emphasis on function.

While Venus chose to study the royal snoggers' technique, others began to make themselves at home.

"Unbelievable." Hermione was heard to mutter. "These lamp shades are Tiffany patterns."

"Did you like my articles, Harry?" Luna asked. She saw the Witch Weekly stuck in his robes and couldn't resist, having already become bored in a train car that nearly everyone else found facinating.

Harry pulled his face off of Usagi's, giving them both a chance to cool down a bit. "I quite forgot about it. Give me a few minutes, Luna, and I'll tell you what I think."

He pulled the magazine borrowed from Claribelle out and looked at the cover again. Harry and Usagi shared a loving gaze that had Ron fake gagging before they opened the magazine. Luna actually wrote two different articles which appeared in this issue. First was the big reveal article which listed everything Usagi, Harry and Pluto discussed the night of the big interview. Her writing style in that one was actually quite a bit more serious that Harry expected, it being an information dump about the Silver Millennium as well as more recent events in Japan and England. Harry and Usagi were both impressed with the story and told Luna as much. As the Ravenclaw blushed under their praise, Harry began to read the next article... the one which focused on a night on the town.

Harry began the reading assignment with enthusiasm. Luna was as honest in her writing as she was face to face. She actually liked Japan enough to write a glowing review of her time there. How wonderful. Wait, what's this about snorkacks? Harry didn't remem- er- oh, bloody hell...

**WITCH WEEKLY**

Special Serenity - Potter Edition

January 1997

NEW YEAR CELEBRATIONS IN JAPAN

By Luna Lovegood

I will always remember the first time I spoke to Harry Potter. It was after he entered the very compartment in which I chose to ride one morning in the Hogwarts express. He spoke to me as if I were a real person and not some lunatic with rare talent in accessorizing. Feeling flattered, I spoke to him as if he were a real person and not the Boy-Who-Lived. When you do nice things for Harry Potter like speak to him normally and help him battle dark wizards, he tends to do nice things like invite you to Japan for holiday.

Ahh, Japan. In a country where the muggles have machines that do things magic cannot hope to match, I was quite surprised to find magicals and muggles mixing freely. Why, not once did the muggles try to burn Sailor Moon at the stake, not even when they learned her real name after the events described in my previous article (Lady Potter Goes Public, page 5). The locals seem very polite, the food is wonderful and their cities just keep going and going. I saw more people in one hour walking through Tokyo than I'd seen in my whole life up to that point. They even have an obsession with rare and exotic creatures. There are yellow rabbit-like creatures called Pikachu that battle with lightning and then there are giant furry beasts called Totoro that travel around in their own feline version of the knight bus. Don't forget the slimy oozing monsters which have an unhealthy fascination with schoolgirls, and I'm not talking about schoolboys either.

Last summer, Harry Potter became very popular here in Japan as his female alter-ego Heather Snape. True, they do not hail him as a savior of the masses as much as Wizarding Britain does, but Heather did become a heroine who defends the innocent from criminals and toys sold in her image are worth a small fortune. The Lady Potter, who is wildly famous for her actions as Sailor Moon, is adored by more muggles than there are wizards and witches in the whole of the Wizarding World. _Her _toy sales are worth several large fortunes.

Between our little arguments with those masked freaks in England and several days of fun and excitement in Tokyo, I believe I've finally walked a mile in Harry's shoes. I won't do that again. His shoes are too big for my dainty feet and they smell of leather and old cheese.

After a historic successful meeting with Their Majesties, the Emperor and Empress of Japan, Harry and Usagi hosted all of their friends at a New Years festival celebration. We managed to attend the last day of the local three day festivities at a temple complex called Asakusa. While much of the city around Asakusa is less than one hundred years old due to that big muggle war Grindelwald was a part of, the temples at the center of this district boast history extending several centuries before Hogwarts Castle was built. It was within sight of these traditional temple buildings that Crown Princess Usagi and her Senshi friends gave we English magicals a taste of life on the other side of Gaia.

Lavender Brown, you better hold your man tight while at school because the local girls seem to like tall wizards. Gryffindor Keeper Ron Weasley was continuously accosted by dozens of girls, every one of them flirting quite heavily. My good friend Neville Longbottom would have received the same attention were it not for Ginny Weasley's fierce territorial display. Unfortunately for Ginny, the blonde and bubbly Sailor Venus seemed immune to her glares and spent a fair amount of time making Neville blush.

While I expect none of Witch Weekly's readers are surprised to see Usagi looking exotic and absolutely beautiful in her furisode, a traditional Japanese gown with long swinging sleeves, the real surprise for anyone that spends anytime at all inside of Hogwarts recently is what Assistant Professor Hermione Granger wore along side her dearest friends Harry and Ron. Looking at the pictures, one would think the girl were adopted into an Ancient and Noble House which may not have been far from the truth. Miss Granger, a blossoming pioneer in the field of magical creature welfare, was dressed in some of the finest satin and lace that House Greengrass could provide. Why, if Draco Malfoy weren't freezing his arse off in some desolate hellhole floating amongst the upper spheres, he might have been attracted to her dressed as she was.

In between episodes of international flirting and revelry, the Senshi treated us to local cuisine. We ate fish that was uncooked and drank coffee with ice in it. I had ice cream that tasted exactly like green tea. It was about that time that monsters attacked. Stupid monsters.

Did they really think attacking a group of wizards, witches, lots of mahou shoujo, a ki master and his ki adept wife was a good idea? Pu-lease. Usagi killed her first youma without help when she was fourteen. Harry and Ron double teamed a full grown mountain troll when they were ickle firsties. It's rather sad that there are no mental health clinics for demonic beings; if there were, then a twelve step program may have shown those three hell-fiends that suicide was not the answer.

After an exciting evening in public like that, I was feeling a bit overwhelmed once we reached our lodgings for the evening. As I often feel overwhelmed when returning to my dorm in Hogwarts, I knew exactly how to relax and end the day. I pulled out some fresh baked Weasley family special brownies to share with those still awake at the time: Harry, Usagi, Senshi Mars and Senshi Jupiter. As Mrs. Weasley's recipes are rather intent based, I asked Neville for some of the more potent ingredients fresh out of Longbottom Manor's greenhouse. After a late night snack, we all became quite relaxed and started a tickle war right there on Harry and Usagi's bed. What fun! The sheets were extra, extra soft. In fact, it was during this tickle war that I finally discovered one of those rare creatures that Daddy and I have been searching for all these years! By some great coincidence, a tickle attack by Harry caused my bloomers to slip and there staring Lord Potter right in the face was a crumple horned snorkack! Why, I've been all over Europe looking for the little buggers only to find out I've been carrying one around with me the whole time. Seeking to confirm my findings, Crown Princess Usagi and Senshi Mars immediately checked each other for snorkacks only to find that they each had one as well. Being lovers of rare animals, Princess Usagi and Senshi Mars gave the two snorkacks equal attention. Harry, was quite distracted by his wife's fun and games until Senshi Jupiter helped me prove that young men can be host to snorkacks also. Lord Potter's pants revealed a rather healthy specimen of the hammer horn snorkack family, which boast longer and more spectacular horns by far. Jupiter was so enamored of the creature that she just had to kiss it. Harry seemed inspired by this act and chose to help me get my snorkack purring quite happily. The next three hours were quite a pleasant lesson on how one can reap great rewards by showering another's snorkack with love and attention.

Yes, I'm quite certain that I shall always treat Harry Potter as a real person and help him fight the occasional dark wizard. He is my very best friend. Perhaps I shall one day have a son that will catch his daughter's eye. I do hope he catches more than her eye though, because that would be gross.

..

Harry continued to stare blankly at the Witch Weekly in his hands. _This_ is why Claribelle was smirking on the platform? Practically every witch in Hogwarts read this thing. By Merlin, even Molly Weasley read these... Harry remembered Hermione saying once that Witch Weekly was printed in over two dozen languages.

"Um... Luna..." Usagi tried to comment. She had been reading right along with Harry.

"Yes?" Luna chirped. She was clearly eager to hear their opinions on her writing skills.

"Did you... did you have to mention the... ummmm... _snorkack fun?_" Harry asked.

"Of course! It was the perfect finish to the perfect holiday! I wish all of my holidays would go as well as this one did!" The dreamy look in her glittering grey eyes made Harry lose the will to complain. Luna's only fault was in telling the truth and getting it past the censors. Harry would just have to take it like a man... after she changed back into one of course.

"You did wonderfully, Luna."

Remembering his promise to Claribelle, Harry bummed ink and quill off Hermione (of course she had some) and signed the front cover before motioning for Usagi to do the same.

After a few more minutes of socializing, the Hogwarts Express blew its whistle and began to pull away from Platform Nine and three-quarters. The Prefects meeting would happen as usual, but the coolness and exclusivity of the Prefect's car was quickly overshadowed by the next car in line. Five staff members... a Crown Princess and her magical girl guard... the most influential student clique in Hogwarts since Tom Riddle walked the halls. In fact, even the future dark lord and his cronies at the time held less sway than the Potters and the core members of the DA even if Tom took a more active role in using his influence. Before the end of the trip, Myrtle Potter joined her adoptive brother and brought the car's total population of resurrected females up to two. Sitting down for tea with Daphne, Usagi and Myrtle, old Professor Slughorn began to wonder why he retired in the first place.

* * *

"Professor Potter! Professor Granger!" The two Gryffindors both looked up to their new Headmistress seconds before they were to sit in their usual places at Gryffindor Table. "A moment of your time, please."

Harry, who made the switch back to male again for the feast, and Hermione looked at each other a moment before turning to meet Minerva's gaze.

"May Usagi and her escort accompany us, Headmistress? We planned on seeking you out after the feast anyway."

"Very well, Professor Potter. We have fifteen minutes before I have to make announcements to the assembled students."

Harry and the three young women nearest him all followed Minerva into the main antechamber to the Great Hall. As they walked forward, there were several whispered converstations which went quiet as Harry walked by. A joke or two could be heard from the more daring student, but Harry paid them no mind. It seems that Lav-Lav's jokes about Harry being a professional wrackspurt and snorkack hunter became really popular on the train ride north.

Minerva and the four teens managed to get simple greetings out of the way and sit down around one side of the round table which seemed unmoved since Albus last sat there. She wasted no time getting down to business.

"First, I'd like to say welcome again to you Lady Potter and to you Senshi Venus and thank you both for what you did at the Yule Ball. You have bravery enough to match any Gryffindor I've ever known." The old Scot began.

"And loyalty to match any Hufflepuff." Harry added.

"Truly a fine combination, Professor Potter." McGonagall agreed. "May I ask how long you intend to stay with us and what level of access you require of the school? I assure you that I do not seek to restrict you in any way, your Highness, but I do wish for my staff to be prepared for any eventuality."

"I wish to stay with my Harry, Headmistress. Due to duties in Japan and to upcoming wedding, I may be in and out of Hogwarts quite often. I may seek to enter class in session at times, but promise not to be bad influence on classes and I will ask Professor for permission to enter classroom." Usagi rattled off.

"I have no objections, your Highness." Minerva replied with a slight nod.

"I wish to sleep with my Harry as we are married by your law." Usagi blushed a little, but managed to keep it to a minimum. "How can arrangements be made so we are not... disturbed?"

Surprisingly, Minerva was quick to respond. "In times gone by, it was quite common for students in Hogwarts to marry before leaving school. Go far enough back in time and you will find records of students being married before they were even sorted. As such, Gryffindor Tower is well equipped with Marital Suites as are the other three Houses."

Usagi and Harry looked at each other and grinned. Thank Merlin she wasn't going to try to split them up or something.

"Now that we have that out of the way, I have a rather big favor to ask of my two Assistant Professors."

Minerva's statement caught their attention. Damn, she even looked nervous.

"Go on..." Harry prodded.

* * *

"May I have your attention, please!" Headmistress McGonagall called. "Children, please settle down!"

The student body of Hogwarts began to quiet down. The noise didn't drop off as quickly as it would have for Dumbledore, but McGonagall was still respected for her stern discipline and the hall did fall silent rather quickly.

"I would like to start this term with a moment of silence for all of those who perished on Christmas Eve."

The entire school stayed silent for a full minute. Even with the tendency of most children to think themselves immortal, knowing that four students who attended the previous meal were dead shook many of them quite deeply.

"Thank you." Minerva broke the silence. "I would like to make some announcements before dinner is served tonight so that you may all have time to discuss the changes we are forced to make in these troubled times."

There was a bit of noise from the students, but a single glare from the Headmistress corrected that problem. At the Gryffindor Table, Harry unconsciously slipped on hand into Herimone's free hand while tightening his grip on Usagi.

"First, in recognition of the times that students either still in Hogwarts or recently graduated have successfully battled dark wizards when adults failed to act, the following students are hereby awarded an O in their Defence Against the Dark Arts N.E.W.T. without sitting the exam…" Murmurs began to spread but Minerva paid them no mind this time. "Fred Weasley… George Weasley… Ronald Weasley… Ginevra Weasley… (the murmurs began to grow in volume but still Minerva continued) Parvati Patil… Padma Patil… Neville Longbottom… Luna Lovegood… Hermione Granger… and… Lord Harry Potter."

Murmurs became full applause. Minerva signaled for the students to quiet down again and they did.

"Furthermore, in recognition of Lord Potter's actions in resurrecting two deceased females by use of pure white magic, Interim Minister for Magic Pius Thicknesse intends to nominate him for an Order of Merlin, First Class."

More applause filled the Great Hall causing Harry to shrink back in his seat until Usagi and Hermione redoubled their efforts to hold him in place. Eventually, the applause died off again.

"And now… we must adjust to the new situation we find ourselves in. With Professor Trelawney deceased, Professor Frienze will be taking over all Divination classes. I myself shall still teach Transfiguration, though I may have my better students substitute teach lower year classes from time to time. And now for the biggest change yet.

"In an emergency meeting of the Hogwarts Board of Governers, it was determined that another fully trained of age wizard could not be recruited for the Defense position when every able wand is needed to combat the threat of dark wizardy. Unfortuantely, the Ministry cannot spare a single auror as even pensioners are being brought back to active service. In light of this issue, two of Hogwarts' very best Defense students have once again agreed to shoulder the burden…"

The four student tables were buzzing with energy now that they could almost predict what Headmistress McGonagall would say next.

"I now ask the staff and students of Hogwarts to welcome Harry Potter and Hermione Granger as full Professors of Defense. They will now teach all Defense Against the Dark Arts classes for every year group for the remainder of this school year."

The dull roar of hundreds of excited students once again filled the Great Hall for several minutes, many Gryffindors going so far as to stand up and dance about not unlike their antics when Harry sat under the sorting so many years ago. After more than a minute of constant cheering, Minerva finally retook control of her school.

"I have one last issue to deal with before we may break bread tonight." Minerva looked over to her two new (not Assistant) Professors. "As I am no longer eligible, would either of you be interested in becoming the new Gryffindor Head of House?"

THUMP

Snickers ran up and down the tables once everyone noticed that Hermione fell to the floor in a dead faint. With Usagi and Neville helping, Harry began to pull 'Mione back onto her chair.

"I think that means she wants the job, Headmistress!" Professor Potter called.

Trying and failing to suppress a smirk, the old Scot agreed. "I'm quite sure she does, Professor Potter. And now… we eat!"

With a wave of her hand, the Great Hall was once again full of plates and platters packed with fresh meat and side dishes of every description. The staff and students of Hogwarts could once again pretend that everything was back to normal, even if only for a little while.

* * *

POP

"Who's there?" A young teenaged girl called.

She had reason to be weary. As a child well above her year mates in intelligence, she had been picked on almost constantly for her bossy, know-it-all ways and unruly hair. Years before, it wasn't so bad because her older sister would spend lots of time every evening comforting her and pointing out the stupidity of those who would hurt her for being different.

_Russtle, russtle..._

"Show yourself!" But no one did.

POP

The bushes to her left shook a little and the young girl took off like a shot for home and the safety of her own room.

Oh, how she wished that Mum and Da hadn't pushed her big sister away when those strange people came for her and took her to that other school. Bogshorts? Dogwarts? What was it again? It had been so long since Da allowed that word to be uttered in their home that she actually forgot it. How embarrassing! She forgot a fact!

The thirteen year old with bushy brown hair and chocolate eyes ran straight through two intersections and nearly upended a milkman in her haste, but by some stroke of luck she made it all the way to her bedroom without being beaten or teased. Panting heavily, she fell onto her bed intent on relaxing after a day of friendless education.

"Eeeeeek!"

She immediately shot back across the room after finding her face full of a package that she never put there… a package that surely would have sent her parents into fits for its _un__natural _look. She quickly looked left and right to see if anyone could have been in her room, but the house was dead quiet. That strange package was the only thing out of place in her well ordered world. Not one spelling or science competition award was out of place anywhere. Not even the ones she took from her sister's room before her parents could bin them and convert it into a study.

After a minute or two of indecision, the young teen slowly inched toward the package intent on examining it.

It seemed to be covered, not with paper, but with parchment. 'Hermione! She sent me something!' Nearly hyperventilating, she came close enough to read the delicately inked script on the front face of the outer wrapping.

To My Juliet,

From Big Sissy Miney

No longer fearful, Juliet carefully reverse engineered the wrapping and began to sift through various items… actual parchments and- what's this? A picture that moves? Juliet Emma Granger's eyes lit up at the moving photograph only to go impossibly wide upon seeing the other, non-magical photo behind it.

Her parents were stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She could no longer tolerate their stupidness.

"Mother. Father." Juliet started two hours later when both of her parents were home from their dental practice. "Why are the both of you such complete morons?"

Not quite as eloquent as Severus Snape would have been, but considering the fact that she hasn't said a cross word to her parents since she was four, this was quite the low blow.

"Excuse me?" Mum was too shocked to say anything else. Surely her daughter would never speak in such a disrespectful tone. Her ears must be mistaken.

"We can handle this with simple logic. I shall present exhibits for the prosecution and the two of you shall confirm or deny their accuracy. Is this agreeable?"

Logic. Mum smiled. Her golden angel was bright for her age, but she was only a child. Two professional adults could surely make her see reason and then get to the bottom of this.

"Quite."

"Exhibit A." Juliet stood with her shoulders high and something hidden behind her back. "You support my academic pursuits knowing that they isolate me from my peers in school with the explanation that I was born with a natural talent that should not be wasted. Is this correct?" Both of her parents nodded.

"Exhibit B." She fidgeted a little and pulled a new magical photograph to show her parents. "My sister was born with the same natural talents as myself and the same desire to use them as much as possible… plus a few extra. You two claim that her extra talents are un-natural and shameful… that seeking to refine her gift is a waste of her future and of your genetic material… that she will never amount to anything. Is this also correct?"

Her Da didn't even bother looking at the photo more than necessary to prove that it was indeed moving of its own accord. Instead, he snapped the photo out of Juliet's hand and tossed it in the rubbish bin.

"You are not to retrieve that photo, understand?" Her father nearly growled. Juliet's brow furrowed.

"I take your reaction to be acceptance of my previous statement… and you owe me a photo. Exhibit C…"

Her father made to take this other photo from her only to have his precious princess swat his hand away. As she had never done that in her life, he froze in shock and indecision. Juliet flipped her last exhibit around for both of her parents to see clearly. It was a non-magical photo. In it, a very regal looking Hermione stood next to a handsome young man that Juliet was sure was that Potter boy Miney always used to go on about. Also standing nearby were two Japanese girls in the most gorgeous kimonos Juliet had ever seen. Behind the boy and three girls were two figures in elaborate chairs that Juliet was sure she's seen on telly and in a dozen books at school… Emperor Akihito and Empress Michiko of Japan.

An official description was written in genuine gold leaf along the bottom of the photo: Their Majesties, the Emperor and Empress of Japan thank Professor Hermione Jane Granger for her kindness and expertise. She is a rare flower and the pride of her ancestors.

"I'm going to say something I've never said before. Mum… Da… Suck it. Just suck it."

Juliet placed Exhibit C on the dinner table and marched upstairs. She hadn't warranted a punishment from her parents in recent memory, so she didn't quite know what to expect. Others in class complained of being grounded, but then their punishments really only sounded like what she did in her spare time alone in her room. What were they complaining about? Honestly.

For the first ten seconds, all she could do was stare at the rather thick pile of letters that Miney had written over the past several months and only now delivered. Apparently, Big Sissy wanted to sneak them all over to Juliet personally during Christmas Break but something happened and she went to Japan instead.

tap – tap - tap

There was a noise at her window.

"Oh, my! Aren't you a pretty Bubo scandiacus!"

She opened her window just enough for a snowy white owl to come in from the cold.

_Bark!_

"Don't tell me Timmy's fallen down the well again." Juliet joked.

_Bark! Hoot!_

The owl hopped closer to Miney's letters, twisted its head and Bark!'ed again. Oh. Oh, right!

"Why would anyone want a collie or retriever when they could have you, eh girl?"

_Bark!_

Juliet could have sworn she heard arrogant confidence in that last bark as she sat down with a clean sheet of paper and pen, intent on matching her sister word for word.

"This may take a while. You want me to get you something from the kitchen?"

_Hoot, bark, bark!_

"Right then, give me a minute or two."

Mum and Da could be stupid if they wanted to be, but Juliet Granger was no idiot. She wanted her Big Sissy back and she wanted her back now.

* * *

"Bloody body!" Myrtle took a swat at the stone wall in front of her only to hiss in pain and start sucking on her knuckles. "I just want to go over there! Why does it have to take so long to get from one place to another around here?"

Harry snickered as he watched his adoptive sister glare at the stones keeping her from her goal.

"I was lucky to be ghost for only small amount of time so I am not having problem with walls like Myrtle." Usagi commented. "Harry, what is fastest way to where we are going?"

Harry looked at Myrtle. "Where are we going?"

"To the same room as when Sir Nicholas had his death day party. Should be all of the same attendees, or so Helena says."

"Oh, follow me then." As both girls were more in tune with absolute direction and distance of rooms in the castle and less in tune with mortal pathways, Harry found himself leading two ex-ghosts and a guardian Senshi to a ghost memorial.

After several twists and turns, four living teens finally found the ghostly memorial to Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington and Peeves.

"Ah, Usagi. Myrtle. Helena mentioned you would be coming. I thank you for not forgetting your peers- or ex-peers as the case may be." The Fat Friar spoke from an open archway.

Through the Hufflepuff house ghost, the girls and Harry were able to see a truly grand assembly of specters. At least twice as many ghosts were in attendance than Nick's Deathday party boasted if Harry guessed correctly.

"I wouldn't have missed it for anything." Myrtle called. Usagi and Harry instantly concurred.

Venus, whose first shift was nearly up, merely yawned and let the other three talk to people she couldn't see or hear.

"Thank you very much for coming." Another ghost... Sir Patrick, was it?... floated over to the group causing many more ghosts to take notice. "It is a sad day for all of us. Why, I can still see the poor man arguing his point to enter the Headless Hunt as if it were yesterday. I had always held out the smallest measure of hope that the poor fool would one day find a way to finish the job and be truly headless. And now...?" Sir Patrick shook his head and floated away disappointed.

Many more ghosts came up to the four living attendees to hear them recount the story of resurrection and ghost-death. The Bloody Barron may have been present, even nearly trapped that day, but he did not truly understand what happened since most of the living witnesses left shortly after the big event. Albus Dumbledore may have been known for using the ghosts of Hogwarts to gather information for him, but he rarely returned the favor himself.

"A stone you say?" A random voice from the crowd of deceased asked.

"That's right. A stone who's origins we're still not really clear on. Ranma mentioned seeing a witch, the Parkinson girl, hand Malfoy a package right before he used the stone in an effort to get rid of Usagi. Little ponce didn't seem to care that other ghosts were in the room, not that anyone felt like interrogating him before sending him on his way to purgatory." Harry mused for a moment. "It really shouldn't be all that complicated though... Draco may have hated me enough to do this on his own, but he would have needed someone to send the stone to him. Sounds like something Riddle could have sent his way, though..."

"Riddle?" Myrtle looked up in surprise. "Wait... I've heard that name before, haven't I?"

"You certainly have, sister dear," Harry got Myrtle to smile at that, "Tom Riddle was the boy responsible for killing you."

Her smile dropped quickly after that.

"What?"

"Tom Marvolo Riddle. That's Lord Voldemort's real name."

"I... " Myrtle seemed to wilt for a minute, "He seemed like such a nice boy... he was a Prefect when I died."

"Yes he was... and he became Head Boy. Dumbledore told me that Tom was a very charming fellow in his youth."

"The little shit!" Several pairs of eyes got wide upon hearing the Grey Lady of Ravenclaw curse. "I told him where I hid Mother's diadem. How could he do this to me?"

Harry turned quickly to ask Helena Ravenclaw what she was talking about, but by then the ghost had already stormed off in a snit.

Usagi and Venus looked at each other. Nope. Way over their heads. Usagi's shrug turned into a yawn half way through.

"You'd better get to bed Princess Buttercup." Harry quickly kissed her forehead. "See her to our rooms, will you Minako? I've got to get Myrtle over to Ravenclaw tower."

Venus winked at Harry and began pulling her charge over to the nearest stairwell. This could be fun... did she really remember the whole way back to Gryffindor Tower?

"You know Luna's going to be waiting for us to show up in the Common Room, don't you? I'm her dorm mate now." Myrtle asked Harry as they began their cross castle trek.

"As long as she's not starkers, I'm sure a good night hug won't break any rules."

"As long as she's not starkers... right..."

Harry looked Myrtle in the eyes for a moment.

"Five sickles?"

"That Luna won't wait for you starkers? Two to one in your favor, Harry."

"Deal."

Harry held out his hand and the Potter siblings shook on it.

Ten minutes later, a very embarrassed Professor Potter walked back to Gryffindor Tower five sickles lighter.

**Chapter End**

**Omake – The Original Snorkack Reference (Omitted)**

"_Usagi!"_ Luna yelled out as she floated down to street level near the Crown Princess and her Inner Senshi.

The girls were getting ready to fight whatever Ranma lured out of Ucchan's when the trap was sprung in a minute or two.

"_Hi Luna!"_ Moon grunted a little bit as Mars elbowed her_. "Oh, yeah, errrr Luna? Can you call us by our Senshi names when were dressed like this?"_

"_Sure!"_ The quirky Ravenclaw hopped off of her broom, shrank it and dropped it into her cleavage. _ "Sailor Moon –wink, wink- can I borrow that Lunar Disguise Pen thingy you told Hermione about a while ago? I've already fought evil as a witch and I'd like to try as a Senshi today."_

Moon looked between Mars and Mercury to see if they had any opinions one way or the other. Mercury shrugged her shoulders and Mars held up one hand in a what_ever _kind of response.

"_Oooookayyyyyyy"_ Moon pulled out one of her earliest tools… one that gave it's user a quick wardrobe/appearance change with the bonus skills and knowledge needed to get a job done.

"Yay!"

Luna lovingly took the very 1980's girly looking plastic pen and held it high above her head. Before any of the Senshi present could stop Luna, she called out her Transformation Phrase.

"By the Power of Hogwarts! I have the Power!"

Moon shielded her eyes as a magical kaleidoscope of lights exploded from Luna's body, conveniently destroying all of the witch's clothes at the same time. For a full second, every video camera and horny otaku in the crowd got a crystal clear view of the dirty blonde witch in her birthday suit. That's when the very air around her began to bubble and distort. Rivers of light erupted and mixed with sentient flowers. A purple haze began to fill the street. My dishwasher plotted to kill me.

Focusing as hard as she could through the unreality, Sailor Moon tried to see what had happened to Luna. It looked like... like... Moon couldn't say what Luna looked like now. Even with the odd buzz she was feeling due to the weird haze around them, Moon still wasn't high enough to properly describe whatever Luna had become.

Sailor Whoevershewas stepped out of her improbability cocoon and walked over to a glass window to have a look at herself.

"Ohhhh! A snorkak! I exist! I exist! I've been looking for me the whole time!" And thusly, Sailor Crumple Horned Snorkack came into existence and the world has been a very silly place ever since.

Remember children: Sailor Snorkak says, "My nose itches!"

**Chapter Notes: ** Yay. More done! Now I have to decide if anything will come of Helena's angry remark or if it's just a red herring.

**Reviewers: **

**ariel stormcloud, Hanzo of the Salamander, Jimm, nate – **Thank you.

**Deathless Insanity – **I forgot to check if that evening was a full moon or not, but Tonks' and Moony's roleplay was pretty kinky either way.

**cross-over-lover232 –** You've got to love Victorian style. Fortunately, the internet is quite full of Victorian dress imagery even if you ignore the porn options.

**Fire From Above – **While I don't intentionaly pack it in, I do get annoyed whenever someone posts a full chapter of some story that has neither plot nor something of equal value... like sex. If there is neither plot nor sex than it isn't a chapter yet;)

**Jokulhaup –** As I said in my quick response: doh! Skuld, not Urd. U R rite and I R dum.

**deitarion/SSokolow –** I think we've actually come upon a point where we must agree to disagree. I did reread that section and still like it. Of course, my opinions on some older chapters have changed over the months, so we'll see if this one gets ripe with age.

**Wonderbee31 – **One of my favorite authors, Ozzallos, wrote a story where Pluto's sex life is evaluated based on her life span. Even if you assume that she does not spend all of her time between the Silver Millennium and our time whoring herself out, she must have put an amazing number of notches on her bedpost.

**jgkitarel – **As I have not worn a corset, I cannot argue the point with you. Blame my opinions on Hollywood for that. Hermione was indeed perfect for the role of support assuming she was smart enough not to get on a soapbox in front of Akihito, and we all know she's smart enough.

**SomeGuyFawkes – **I don't feel like racing on an oval track is all that manly... maybe if they added landmines. If I really want to man it up, I should have Chuck Norris kick Voldie in the nuts then have Clint Eastwood shoot his sorry ass. Repeatedly. Do you think the Room of Requirements can make a well stocked firing range? I recently maned up my other story with a 5" naval deck gun. That was fun.

**The Fanfic Stealer –** Yes, yes... Skuld not Urd. My bad. I agree that his end should be humiliating.

**WhiteElfElder – **While Harry will likely never tag Pluto, she'll always be Hotness to him. Luna and Makoto doubleteam for the win! In time, I think Harry and TM will get along pretty well but I don't know if it would get to best mate or brother status.

**Twylyte –** I refuse to harsh everybody's mellow with a 'half the main characters die' scene, though we can't let the rest of the story be too easy. Don't worry, I'll keep it going.

**Narsil –** I think the story actually got a little more serious than I originally planned for, but it works fine.

**skywiseskychan –** The Queen. Yes... I'll have to figure out what angle I should take with her. I don't just want to be seen as rehashing another fanfic's idea for Her.

**docfrodo – **The girls need their own omake mini-chapter. Maybe 'Super Happy Fun Magic Club!' or something equally cheezy.

**PspychD.F. –** (odd. the editor won't let me type out your full name) At the very least, Nev should get to know more than one girl before he settles down.

**ZephyrFiction – **Sadly, I do all my writing sober. Somehow that works for me.

**Less Wrong – **What? A lot of important people just died a few days ago. If you want the potential for main/secondary character death, than read my other story.

**Reviewer of the West –** The Inner Senshi are still prone to talking first but the Outers would have jumped his ass.

**Memories-of-the-Shadows – **Yes, nobody wants alt-Cuteness.

**ChronoBlade –** Luckily Harry and Usagi didn't go for morning action with the curtains open. And I MUST put little bits of Star Wars in... just very tiny doses.


	15. Back to Work

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Fifteen****: Back to Work**

January 6th, 1997

"Harry!"

Harry closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"In this room at this hour, that's 'Professor Potter'. Do you understand that, Mister Weasley?"

"Sure, mate." Ron soldiered on as the other students who were not professors snickered.

This afternoon was the Sixth Year N.E.W.T. Defense class with lions and snakes. In fact, it was the first time this class had reconvened since Christmas holiday ended and all of Harry's year mates… if he could still call them that… his year mates were taking their seats.

"Oh, Professor Potter!" Lavender sing-songed. "We were wondering if you could give us all a lesson on snorkack hunting today."

Beside her, Parvati tittered. Actually, most of the girls in class did.

Hermione came to her fellow Professor's defense. "I think you want Care of Magical Creatures, Miss Patil."

Lavender and Parvati looked at each other for a moment.

"But Hagrid's teahcin- oh, I think I'm going to be ill..." Lav-Lav groaned.

A red faced Pav-Pav could be heard to mumble, "...but you have to wonder how big..."

"Ron!" Harry shouted a bit louder than he intended to. Lavender had unleashed horrible thoughts into the class in general and Obliviation was risky if you weren't trained properly. "Not that I don't want you in here ma- I mean, Mister Weasley, but I half expected those with N.E.W.T.'s in Defense to stop coming."

Ron seemed to collect himself a bit before answering. "To be honest, _Professor_, that's exactly what I was going to do. You know... a whole class cut from my weekly schedule and fewer essays to write seemed brilliant. But then McGonagall told the whole school that my mates were going to be teaching Defense and, well, I'm not missing this, not for Canons season tickets!"

Half of the class roared their approval. Surprisingly, the other half of the class... the green and silver tied half... seemed to be applauding as well, though in a more dignified manner.

Caught up in the moment, it took a gentle hand settling on his arm for Harry to collect himself. He gave Hermione's hand a brief squeeze before addressing his students once more.

"Thanks for that, mate." Harry turned briefly to pick up a basket before stepping away from the desk. "I don't know how much the younger years have told you, but for most classes, we tend to start off with a quick game of sorts to get the blood flowing... then we have some theory and discussion (an obvious wink was thrown back to his co-Professor to much laughter)... and then we end the class with practical wandwork directly related to the day's topic."

As Harry talked, he also began to pick out colored tokens and place them on the student's desks as he walked by them. Confused, some students left them where they were and some picked them up to have a closer look. The tokens themselves weren't remarkable, round and wooden and plain; the only difference between them being that some were yellow and some were white. One or two students silently traded tokens behind Harry's back but neither he nor Hermione chose to censure the traders.

"Has everyone got a token now?" Hermione asked once Harry approached the front desk again. There were silent nods all around. "Good. As Professor Potter is done passing out the tokens, you are all to stand up and walk to your wall as noted by its color."

Harry quickly cast two spells on opposing walls, giving them a magical paint job. As the class began to get up and turn for 'their' walls, some of them began to notice what made this exercise different from what they had done before.

"Um, Professor…" Lavender started, "Can I switch sides?"

Both Parvati and Ron were looking at her from the other side of the room; Millicent Bulstrode stood to Lavender's right and Daphne to her left.

"While working with someone you trust to achieve a common goal is an effective strategy," Hermione replied, "dark wizards and dark creatures will frequently wait until you are either alone or unescorted among strangers to catch you at your weakest. At that point, you have to either stand on your own two feet or be willing to work with those around you."

Harry swished his wand causing all of the desks in the room to collect into three randomly spaced stacks near the center.

"In this game, we will study two different aspects of magical combat. The yellow team will cast Stupefy and Protego only. They cannot Enervate their teammates. The white team will cast Stupefy and Enervate. _They_ will not be allowed to cast Protego." Harry began to raise his hand as a signal but stopped right before starting the game. "Almost forgot… feel free to use Lumos and similar light spells if you need to."

Harry nodded to his co-Professor who immediately extinguished all light in the room.

"GO!" Harry shouted, throwing a Bluebell flame charm into each pile of desks, turning them into faux bonfires.

That mixture of surprise and magical light must have triggered something in someone, for half a second later a single stunner passed from Ron's side of the room to Lavender's. That spell didn't hit anything, but it did prompt about half the remaining students to raise their wands and fire off stunners.

As their student-peers began to loosen up under Harry's compliments and critiques, Hermione threw up a notice-me-not at the professor's desk so that she could do some last minute studying. In about ten minutes, the two teens would attempt to teach something they hadn't actually learned themselves. Usagi's Disguise Pen was looking better by the minute.

* * *

Voldemort sat in darkness.

He struggled to maintain control, just as he had been doing ever since the ministry battle and most certainly after the meeting he just ended. Most of his servants managed to withdraw under their own power but there were those who had to be carried. There were also those who were caught out planning to leave his service. Only ash remained to mark their pitiful ends.

Damn the Moon Princess and damn her mate, Harry Potter. The Dark Lord's iron clad control of all Death Eaters was slipping. He could easily dismiss the Prophet's stories as lies... after all, the Prophet had been spouting lies for Lucius and Fudge for years. No, what really caused problems was that this foreign waif was now practically enshrined by the pureblood elite.

How was he supposed to hold court as the Heir of Slytherin if some little Japanese whore just waltzes into England and declares herself the purest of all purebloods? Granted, the Crown Princess wasn't actually demanding that everyone fall on bended knee, but that only proves that she is too weak to wield the power pureblood houses seem willing to give her. Luckily, she and Potter both seem willing to lose themselves in petty distractions such as wedding plans and teaching classes-

Oh, that one really got Tom's hatred burning hot. _Professor Potter_. Potter! Teaching Defense when Dumbledore refused Tom's request so many years ago! That little shit still doesn't know half of the magical lore Tom Riddle knew before he sat his O.W.L.'s! To think that young wizards and witches think they can rise from the filth that is common life... to think that they consider Potter capable of making them stronger!

They would learn. Oh yes, they would learn. There were so very many lessons Voldemort had to teach!

A long boney finger moved up to scratch that magically hidden mark, the black crescent moon burned into his forehead. It still hadn't healed. The Moon Princess caused him pain unlike any he has experienced before or since. His shoulder wasn't much better either no thanks to Potter. It was rare that someone surprised the Dark Lord, and Potter's last attack certainly did that. His shoulder blade was still sore and his range of motion left much to be desired.

They would learn a most horrible lesson. The Crown Princess of the Moon must be made an example of... and it must be so great and terrible that the story of her suffering would obscure the myth of her divine origins. If only she weren't so damn powerful in her white magic... how could she be so powerful as to give Potter a portion of that power and _still_ do so well against the Heir of Slytherin?

But wait... If Potter of all people could share in the power of an avatar, perhaps he could as well?

Voldemort silently cursed the distance and history which held magical secrets at arm's length from him. Surely he could unravel this secret, but there was work to be done first.

"Rookwood!" Voldemort bellowed. He added power to his words, that they may pierce the walls of Riddle (nee Malfoy) Manor and find the former Unspeakable. **"Attend to your Master****, Rookwood****!"**

As he waited for his most intelligent follower to appear, the Dark Lord weighed the pros and cons of calling in Bellatrix as well. The power of an avatar may need a female's body in some way if the Senshi are any indication. He should pick one or two of his lesser followers for the project as well; designing a ritual from scratch never worked right the first time.

"You called, my Lord?" Rookwood asked as he presented himself and kissed the hem of Voldemort's robes.

"Yes." Voldemort answered. "I have a new task for you."

* * *

_**Thunk**_

Harry gently let his head rest on the surface of the door he had just closed. The last 'student' of his and 'Mione's initial Sixth Year Gryffindor/Slytherin N.E.W.T. Level class just left, leaving the two teen professors feeling a bit worn down.

_**Thunk - Thunk**_

The first bump jolted Harry's brain hard enough that he thought doing it again might be a good idea.

"I admit," the brown haired witch behind him muttered, "that was harder than I thought it would be."

"This isn't going to be easy, Hermione..." Harry turned and leaned back against the door that held the world back for a few moments longer. "I'm pretty sure half of that lot know more spells than I do."

"I expect it's more like one third, but I see your point." Harry mock glared at his female nemesis and received a raspberry for his troubles. "What you have to remember is that you do know more _defense_ than any two of them put together."

"Not if you were one of them."

"That's why I'm up front with you, of course." Hermione slipped up to her closest friend and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. "And now that Usagi is alive and well and walking around with a guardian Senshi at all hours... I think we might actually be able to use her more effectively in the classroom."

Harry nodded silently. He had thought of the same thing even if he hadn't said so out loud. As Senshi, Usagi and her fellow magical girls had loads of experience dealing with magical traps and violent battles. There was, however, one trick Hermione pulled in class that caught Harry off guard.

"What I don't understand is how Ron and Nev and Daphne are supposed to find that book you told them to research." He said. "I don't think I've ever seen a copy of Sun Tzu's The Art of War... and I've certainly never tried to compare muggle warfare to magical combat."

Hermoine seemed to internally debate something as Harry watched for a moment. The boy stayed silent, lest she censure him for interrupting. She must have made her choice, as she pulled her wand out and touched it to her temple and drew out a softly glowing strand of pure memory. Knowing the drill, Harry accepted it with little difficulty.

"I've put in a rush owl order to stock the school library and have one book available at each desk. Should be here tomorrow afternoon." Hermione supplied.

"Wow... I think I really like this book..." Harry stared off into space for a moment to absorb the ancient text of Chinese military doctrine. Suddenly, his eyes got very wide and his face went red. "Ummmm... 'Mione?"

"Yes, Harry?" She replied.

"Do you remember why you nearly lost your place half way through 'Military Disposition'?"

"Was..." She thought back. "Was that when I had to set the book down to grab a bogro-" Suddenly, her face was as red as his.

"Well, it's not like I didn't already know what it's like to go to the loo as a girl." Harry offered. It didn't help.

"Be a dear and hold still while I Obliviate you."

"I'd rather you didn't." Harry replied before changing the subject. "Coming down for lunch?"

Hermione seemed to sigh and accept the embarrassment as her friend opened the door to the hallway outside of their classroom. Perhaps she'd hold off if witnesses were about?

"Fine, though I don't feel all that hungry right now."

"Maybe if you stopped by Myrtle's old haunt to make some room..."

"Harry!" Hermione went for her wand, but Harry was through the door and off like a shot. "You mustn't speak to your Head of House with such disrespect!"

* * *

"Professor Potter?"

Harry put down his tea and turned around.

"When I'm not in class or sitting at the Head Table or doing some other professor-ish kind of thing, Daphne, please call me Harry."

His mates at the Gryffindor Table voiced their approval. Well, except for Hermione, but she was trying hard to be very Head-of-House like. She wanted to sit at the Head Table and get properly addressed as was her due... but Harry sat down amongst friends and she wasn't about to go up to the professors' table without him.

"Okay, Harry." The Slytherin witch smiled and held out a letter. "My father asked that I relay this message to you."

Harry took the folded parchment, thanked Daphne, and broke the wax seal.

"Well, what is it then?" Ron asked, only to get a scolding from his Head of House for not minding his own business.

"Calm down 'Mione," Harry offered, "Damien just wrote to tell me that the Wizengamot will be voting in the next Minister this coming Monday. He'd like me and Usagi to be present for the vote."

He briefly scanned the mass of students eating lunch for a head of long silver hair. It wasn't hard to spot as no other girl had anything remotely like it. Harry smiled upon seeing Usagi holding court right in the middle of Slytherin House's table. Mars was standing behind her as were Luna and Myrtle. While it was clear that the two Ravenclaws were being as protective as Mars was, it was also clear that- for once- Harry had nothing to fear from the house of snakes.

As he watched, Usagi turned to look at him. Had someone told her he was staring or something? With a bright toothy smile, Usagi blew him a kiss. Not one to pass on a challenge, Harry blew one back. Somebody must have said something juicy, as Usagi turned bright red and began tittering which then led to a wave of giggles passing through all of the nearby witches.

"Whipped, I tell you. Completely whipped." Ron muttered, earning a few chuckles from the other upper year lions that were watching.

"I'm not the one spoon feeding Lav-Lav, now, am I, Ron?" The redhead went red faced and dropped his spoon half way up to the bouncy blonde's waiting mouth. Several more young wizards laughed as Lavender pouted and Ron penitently wiped custard off of her blouse.

"So Prof- er, Harry..." Neville spoke up from the other side of the table, "how was your first day back in our class this year?"

Ginny was sitting next to Nev... so close as to allow their thighs to touch... and he felt like he needed a distraction lest the younger witch entice him to do whatever it was she was hinting at. He was still unused to sweet smiles and the feel of Ginny's hand as it covered his. Nev wasn't sure yet, but he was beginning to think he had a girlfriend.

"I'd like to hear your side of things first if you don't mind." Harry replied.

Seeing no reason not to, Nev complied.

"Well... that game at the start was a bit of a shocker. Fun though, once I stopped having Snape flashbacks. You did stick to spells that didn't hurt, so that helped." Neville idly scratched the back of his head. "The rest of it was good too. If I hadn't been going to classes with you and Hermione for years, I wouldn't have found you two teaching at all odd."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, mate." Harry sounded truly relieved.

Both he and Hermione were having serious confidence issues with these first few classes as they had no time to adjust... just one late night meeting with the other Heads of House and McGonagall to discuss what the O.W.L. and N.E.W.T. students were supposed to be learning. Were it not for Pepperup potion, they would have been far too panicky and sleep deprived to have done a good job on the first day.

"So how was it then?" Neville asked again.

Harry looked at Hermione who nodded weakly back.

"Bloody scary." There was a round of laughter as everyone who could listen in was doing so. "The younger students took some getting used to, but their being younger still helps because even the Fourth Years accept that we've taken our O.W.L.s and done well on them. No such luck with you lot."

"But the D.A., Harry." Parvati added from the wings. "Fred and George were two years above you and you taught them loads that they weren't getting in class."

"True, but then the D.A. is just a club- even if it is a very important one- and I wasn't personally responsible for getting Fred and George ready to take their N.E.W.T.s. I AM responsible for teaching _all of you_ from the smallest Firstie up to Head Girl Chang herself. If she doesn't get a decent grade, it's my fault. It doesn't matter that half of you know more spells than I do-"

"But not more defensive magics." Hermione interrupted.

"But not more defensive magics-" Harry amended, "'Mione and I are responsible for the O.W.L. and N.E.W.T. scores of a hundred or more students this year."

Ron pulled his gaze away from Harry's worried face to look at his sister.

"Ginny's in your O.W.L. class this year."

Ginny caught Harry staring at her and put on her best innocent angel face. It didn't work for shite these days.

"We have her tomorrow morning and Luna and Myrtle in the next class." Hermione supplied. "Our first Seventh Year class is tomorrow as well."

"Don't fret. I promise not to give you a hard time." Ginny's soothing answer came with the nods and grunts of an couple of other Fifth Year lions and puffs who were listening in. "You are already the best defense teacher I've ever had, Harry- and you too Hermione- and I'm positive that I'm going to get an O no matter how shitty the previous professors were at it!"

Hermione's 'language, Ginevra' was drowned out by a sea of 'here, here's.

Not too far away at the Head Table, Headmistress McGonagall looked back and forth between the crowd of pureblood snakes and ravens hanging off of Crown Princess Usagi's every word and the crowd of lions and puffs which seemed to be doing the same for their new Defense Professors.

"Well bless my..." Minerva had heard the changes in the Sorting Hat's song these past two years, though she may be as guilty as any other for trying to ignore them, but only now did she notice that something truly remarkable was happening in the student population. Harry and Her Highness were uniting the houses. While it was true that Harry could at times claim support from three out of four, Slytherin had never warmed up to him before... but now look. Between the Lord and Lady Potter, they had all four houses tamed at the same time!

* * *

January 13th, 1997

"...and I really, really am sorry for just leaving you like this-"

"Forget it, Harry." Hermione cut her co-Professor off. "Ranma and Shampoo are going to help me with physical self defense lectures, demonstrations and evaluations today. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if they tell me to stay in the office and grade papers to keep me out of their way."

"So you might have a minute or two for personal business?" Harry slowed his trek to the school gates and watched Hermione's face become pensive.

"There is a lot of paperwork to do and essay's to grade, Harry... we've been lucky so far-"

"But surely you have an hour or two that you can use for a little trip to the muggle world? Even if it's just your lunch break?"

"I- I don't know, Harry..."

Harry pulled his friend close and held her tight.

"You were so happy when Hedwig came back to us with all of those letters from Juliet. Ten letters written in two days! She really is your sister, isn't she?"

"But how would I get there?" Harry could hear the need in Hermione's question. And the fear.

"Minerva. Have her make a portkey to somewhere close to your sister's school and go muggle the rest of the way or something. Actually, I bet that even if you do use magic, no-one would censure you for it and if they did then I would have a few words with them and sort it all out."

Hermione snorted into his chest and punched him halfheartedly. "Such a bad influence… How am I supposed to say no to that?"

"You're not supposed to."

"Alright." Hermione conceded defeat. She could trust her students to Ranma and Shampoo for an hour or two and be back before dinner. "You win. I'll do it."

"Brilliant!"

They separated and continued walking down to the school gates where Harry could just make out a quartet of magical girls. Usagi in her Crown Princess form was being accompanied by Venus, Mercury and Pluto. There was a gleam in Usagi's eye, a smile on her face and a blush on her cheeks. Wait a tick... there was something familiar about her appearance even if Harry couldn't put his finger on it at the moment.

Ignoring the sense of déjà vu for a minute, Harry stepped up to Usagi and pulled her into a kiss.

"I don't know, Princess." Venus called from the side. "That kiss wasn't nearly as hot as the one you got half an hour ago."

"Shut it, Venus!" Usagi barked.

"What hot kiss? We weren't together half an hour ago." Harry asked.

Behind him, Hermione's eyebrows rose. She got it.

"Yes we were, Love." Usagi replied, her smooth voice soothing his nerves. "Half an hour ago for me but six months ago for you."

It was Harry's turn to have his eyebrows rise. "Oh, right! You must have gone back to the Wizengamot meeting when Scrimgeour and… and Dumble… dor…"

Usagi lost her happy thought for a moment. "Yes. It was difficult meeting the Minister and Headmaster Dumbledore again. I had to focus on you the whole time…I was sure to make a mistake otherwise."

Harry's Love pulled a ring off her finger and slipped it into Harry's palm. When next she spoke, Usagi's adorable accent returned, making Harry grin. "Thank you again for letting me use translation ring, my Harry. Always best to speak clearly when words are important."

Harry took Usagi's hand and slipped the translation ring right back onto the finger Usagi just pulled it from.

"We're going right back to the Ministry, Love." He turned to Pluto. "Or at least I think we are?"

"We are, Harry." The green haired Senshi nodded. "Doing our trips back to back like this will keep the Ministry floor plan fresh in our minds just in case something unexpected happens."

Harry tensed. "DO you expect something, er, unexpected will happen, Pluto?"

"No, Harry. But then, I didn't see the stone that took Nick and Peeves ahead of time nor did I know Prince Herb was going to attack Hogwarts castle."

"I'm sorry about that-" But Pluto didn't want to hear Harry's apology.

"Think nothing of it, Harry. Jusenkyo is as far outside of your control as it is outside of mine."

"Alright then." Harry turned around and gave Hermione a big hug. "And I want to hear all about your sister this afternoon, got it?"

"Of course, Harry. If only we could get her to Hogwarts for a tour or something…"

"Well, why can- oh, I suppose I'd need to get another anti-muggle charm bracelet before we could bring her in."

Suddenly, Harry's vision was filled with one of the bracelets in question. Mercury was holding it out.

"You can have this one back, Harry." The blue haired Senshi intoned. "Our Senshi forms are now resistant to this kind of magic thanks to your generous gifts."

"Don't forget the tireless efforts of your boyfriends, Mercury." Venus joked.

"They are not my boyfriends." Mercury blushed while recalling the twin redheads in question.

"Yet."

"That's enough, you two." Their Princess warned before stepping up to Hermione and giving her a big hug. "I want to hear all about Juliet when you get back, okay?"

"Yes, of course."

Hermione said her goodbye's before turning back into the school and building her resolve. It wouldn't be easy asking Minerva for a portkey out, but then Hermione wasn't a Gryffindor for nothing.

"You think she'll be okay?" Harry asked the magical girls around him.

"She needs this." Usagi responded. "Shingo may be a pest at times, but he's my brother and I can't imagine what it would be like for Mom and Dad to cut me out of their lives and Shingo's too."

"Alright, ladies and gentlman." Pluto interrupted. "It's time. Would everyone please grab onto the Garnet Rod? Thank you. Annnnnd-"

Without sound or a disturbance of any kind, one wizard and four Senshi moved instantly from northern Scotland to London.

"_Eww, gross."_ Venus commented on their new location.

It was a rather filthy back alley which looked nothing like the Ministry of Magic's main lobby.

"_It can't be helped,Venus," _ Pluto returned,_ "without getting Harry into the lobby first with a target stone, we can't breach the wards."_

As everyone stepped back from Pluto and her staff, Venus pinched her nose closed and Harry kicked an aluminium can out of his way.

Harry then cast a few air freshening charms, much to the delight of the younger Senshi and his Love.

"_Yup! I'm keeping you!" _The Crown Princess chirped before laying a sloppy kiss on Harry's cheek.

"_Hold still, ladies." _ Harry said as he lifted his holly and phoenix feather wand high into the air. _"With a swish and a flick or two, you could walk down the middle of Charing Cross Road starkers and no regular Briton would notice."_

"_Really?"_ Venus perked up at his proclamation. _"I totally love those dreams! Can I run naked through London when we're done, Princess? Pleeeeaaaaassseeeee?"_

"_Let's wait until England's dark lord problem is taken care of, okay Venus?"_ Usagi answered.

"_Fine." _

Harry finished casting his privacy spells on each Senshi and himself as Venus burned through her daily allotment of pout. Finally, the group was ready to leave the alley and step into a little used phone booth one block down.

"_Quit poking the pedestrians, Venus." _ Usagi had to comment halfway there. The blonde really was having too much fun being undetectable.

"_Sorry."_

- beep beep beeeep beep beeep-

"Good morning and welcome to the Ministry of Magic this lovely Monday morning. Please state your name or names as well as your business today for security purposes. Thank you."

Harry snorted at the thought of Ministry security as he relayed names and a purpose ('to have fun storming the castle') before the magical elevator ride down.

* * *

A bell rang scattering a group of squirrels who had been Hermione's entertainment for the last ten minutes. She cast a muggle repelling charm on herself, found a perch nearby and waited. Soon, small groups of children began to exit the school she was watching and spread out into the courtyard. While it was quite chilly, there wasn't any snow on the ground and Hermione knew that Juliet would pick the quiet cold over the noisy caf and its many cliques and social webs.

Ahh, there she is. Hermione stifled a gasp; Juliet really was just a younger clone of herself. Why, all Hermione had to do was imagine a twelve year old Harry on one side and a thirteen year old Ron on the other, and she had a picture of herself during the whole Chamber of Secrets fiasco.

The younger bushy haired teen walked straight to the furthest table from the doors and set her things down for some quick lunch and some light reading. Perfect! Hermione's hiding place was less than ten paces away. Definitely light reading... the book looked to have less than a thousand pages.

Hermione smiled when her sister looked her way. But wait, what's this? Juliet isn't looking away?

"'Miney?"

"J-Juliet?"

"'Miney!" Before the bigger Granger girl could react, the younger one dropped her tomato sandwich, hopped up and sprinted over to her sister's 'secret' location.

As Hermione caught seven stone of excited thirteen year old, the other children went back to what they were doing. There was a bit of a scene at first when the quietest girl in school just shouted nonsense for no good reason and took off like a shot, but for some odd reason they all lost interest at the same time. Imagine that.

"Oh, you really came!" Juliet wrapped her arms around her bigger sister and squeezed for all she was worth.

"I give! I give!" Hermione was too shocked and off balance to win the 'fight'. "By Merlin, Juliet, I've missed you so!"

The smaller girl laughed. Funny, Hermione couldn't remember precisely the last time she saw her sister laugh.

"'By Merlin?' They've got you saying that now, have they?" Juliet giggled. "Next, you'll be shouting 'by Circe' or perhaps 'sweet Morgana' next!"

"Don't make me cast a tickling charm!" Hermione warned, causing her sister's eyes to widen and sparkle. "I can if I want to!"

After another round of giggles, Juliet finally calmed down enough to have a normal conversation.

"So. What are you doing down here in Muggle Land on a school day, _Professor Granger_?"

'Mione took a moment to sort out her jumper before answering. "Harry had to go in to the Ministry today... new Minister for Magic being voted in and all that... and so we arranged for the Saotome's to run today's classes. I was going to grade some papers until Harry threatened to hex me unless I played hooky and came to see you."

"The martial artists? I still don't understand how hand-to-hand specialists could beat wizards and witches, let alone teach them in wizard school."

If only she knew... "You mustn't underestimate that which you do not understand. That's really what keeps Magical England stuck two hundred years in the past... the muggle world changing faster than the more traditional magical aristocrats could ever cope with. Way back when, muggles nearly as helpless and weak as magicals took them for but the purebloods still don't understand the Industrial Revolution and the changes that were sparked from scientific development."

"I think you're teaching the wrong class, 'Miney. You you could revolutionize the Muggle Studies coursework."

Hermione did seem to think about it. "Perhaps after Voldemort is out of the picture for good, but until then Harry needs me by his side."

"How does that work? If you don't mind my asking?" Juliet bit her lip hoping she hadn't gone too far.

Hermione sighed. "I was a fool. Harry was my first true friend and I was so afraid of losing him that I kept my real feelings buried deep. He could have used a girlfriend but he desperately needed a sister and I was happy to be that sister."

"Sisters are useful things, aren't they?" Juliet giggled again. Hermione wondered if that sound was what Harry and Ron heard when she herself giggled.

"They are indeed. Case in point: with you being in the muggle world, I'll need you to help keep me up to date on all of the latest computer and science advancements. Hogwarts doesn't get Popular Science or Popular Mechanics. Why, the Library doesn't even have a card catalogue! If you want help finding a book, you have to trust that Madam Pince knows what you need and remembers where it is. To be fair, I've only found her to be in error once so far."

"Oooh, I can't help you there." Juliet grouched. "I'm pants with computers."

"What! How can that be?"

"It's like they hate me or something... all I have to do is walk into a room and they crash randomly or reboot without buttons being pressed. Da banned me from his home office last year when he had to reinstall his operating system after I tried to connect to a bulletin board service with Mum one night."

Hermione kept quiet and listened. There was something odd about this but she just couldn't figure out what it was.

"How am I supposed to continue my studies if I can't even use the new electronic card catalogue in the school library without a four point two percent chance of frying the circuits?"

"Oi! Look 'ere!" The two girls looked over to the boy who interrupted their heart to heart. "The bookworm done run off an' left her stuff just lyin' around."

Two more boys walked over to the first, smirking at the 'unguarded' lunch and school supplies.

"We should teach her that you don't just leave your stuff out in the open, yeah?"

The three boys closed in on Juliet's things prompting Hermione to get up and stalk over to them. When she was almost within arm's reach of the first boy, he did something she didn't expect.

"You know, I think I'd rather go back inside." The boy backed away from the table and Juliet's things. "It's too cold out here today."

"Yeah." "Right." The other two quickly agreed and followed him in.

"That was odd." Juliet called over Hermione's shoulder.

Creasing her brow, Hermione walked back over to her sister and stared at her in thought.

"You saw me. You didn't move away… you got closer." Proving that she spent a lot of time with Harry, Hermione scratched her forehead while concentrating. "And computers don't like you…"

"What is it?" Juliet inquired.

Hermione almost pulled out her wand, but thought better of it. She was no Ollivander.

"When I'm not home, do strange things happen? Things that don't make sense?"

Juliet thought about her sister's question.

"Well, my library seems to sort itself sometimes and Mum and Da claim to have nothing to do with it. I've always thought the house was haunted and now that you've written to me about ghosts in Hogwarts, I'm pretty sure it is."

Hermione began to pace in a tight circuit.

"Witches can see ghosts. I never saw one at home; ergo, no ghost in the house unless it hid from me the whole time. How long have you thought there was a ghost messing with you?"

"Since I was really little." Juliet replied. "Long before you went to Hogwarts."

"I was a little too excited when you first saw me, or I would have figured this out sooner." Hermione was bursting with equal parts excitement and anger.

"Figure out what, 'Miney?"

The young witch stopped pacing and pinned her sister with a serious gaze. "In order to avoid the other students and to get a good look at you, I cast a muggle repelling charm before you came out of the door. You saw right through it and tackled me straight away. I thought that maybe I had miscast it, but the boys clearly felt it and walked off as quick as they could when I approached them."

"But… but that would mean-"

"You're not a muggle."

"What?" Juliet was quite sure she was. Mum and Da were clear about them only having one witch.

"There isn't a ghost at home… you've been sorting your library with accidental magic!"

"But I didn't get a Hogwarts letter."

"Didn't you? You don't sort the post, do you?"

"No. Mum does. Would she… could they hide this? You said Harry's relatives were swarmed by hundreds of letters."

"But Mum knew about owl post by then." Hermione offered. "It's possible that Mum replied to McGonagall with a refusal. That would have stopped the letters and neither of us would have heard about it."

The two girls were silent for a little while, trying to let it all sink in.

"Soooo… I'm a witch?" Juliet asked.

"It would seem so. It explains the computers… electronics are susceptible to magical interference. We'll need to do some research… and Mum's got some explaining to do."

The bell rang. Lunch was over and Juliet had classes to attend.

Hermione started before reaching over for a hug. "I need to go. So do you."

"What are you going to do? When am I going to see you again?" Juliet suddenly didn't feel like going to class.

"I can't leave the castle too often… I've gotten a promotion since my last letter and I've more responsibilities in the castle than ever before." Hermione hugged her sister tighter before letting go. "I'll try to come home as soon as I can to sort this all out- this Saturday or Sunday if at all possible. Will you be alright until then?"

Juliet nodded.

Hermione and Juliet said their last farewells before the younger witch jogged back inside the building. If she didn't hurry, it would be the first time she was late to class… ever. From across the courtyard, Hermione watched her sister disappear behind heavy metal doors, took a deep cleansing breath and activated her return portkey.

* * *

"… therefore, by a clear majority I decree Lord Manfred Marchbanks to be your new Chief Warlock!" Interim Minister Thicknesse declared to a packed Wizengamot Chamber.

As Chief Warlock Marchbanks stood to accept his new post, Harry looked around the chamber again. He, Usagi and their Senshi escort for the day were all sitting in a section dedicated to honored guests right behind and to the right of the main podium. On their entry into the chamber, Harry and Usagi were told by Moody (who was an active duty auror again) that their seats were traditionally dedicated to the muggle royal family, not that the Queen or her predecessors have been officially invited to a Wizengamot meeting since the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy was signed into law in 1692. The Wizengamot Chamber spread out before Harry in a large oval which seemed twice as large as courtroom ten. It did have similar tiered seating and a recessed central floor. The seating was frequently interrupted by wooden colonnades which seemed to support hundreds of oil lamps. The room was a bit dim by muggle standards but still well lit for not having any windows, electric fixtures or an enchanted ceiling. In the shadowy ceiling structure above, Harry could make out bits and pieces of hundreds of hereditary banners. He wondered if one of them was his.

"Greetings, fellow members of the Wizengamot and guests." Lord Marchbanks called out after applying a sonorous to his voice.

Though Marchbanks looked younger than Albus Dumbledore, he certainly moved with the frailty of old age and his voice was rough and broken. Not knowing any more about the man, Harry would have to give him fair odds for snuffing it sometime soon.

"Thank you, Interim Minister Thicknesse." He continued after the assembled witches and wizards quieted down some. "As you are all no doubt aware, today is an important meeting not just for the position I have just been given but for the emergency election of a new Minister for Magic. And the candidates for Minister for Magic are as follows…

"Pius Thicknesse, nominated by Tiberius Ogden…" The Interim Minister stood to polite applause.

"Dolores Umbridge, nominated by proxy for the Noble House of Lestrange…" Dolores stood, though none willingly clapped for her.

"And finally, we have Lord Damien Greengrass, who was nominated by Lord Richard Davis…" Damien stood to a noticeable swell in applause causing Umbridge to glare harshly for a moment before remembering herself and plastering a sickly sweet smile back in place. Harry and Usagi both noticed Melian Greengrass sitting next to her husband and waived to her. He couldn't be sure, but Harry thought she may have nodded back to them.

"Other candidates were nominated, but withdrew due to private health concerns… or in one case death by dark wizard attack. Due to the unprecedented attack upon the Ministry of Magic's Yule ball only two weeks ago, we find ourselves in need of leadership during a time of near civil war. Minister Scrimgeour was killed by disciples of Tom Riddle, also known as He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named or Lord Voldemort, and we must elect a strong replacement who will shape England's future for the betterment of all.

"I shall now ask the candidates to give a speech outlining their qualifications and goals… after which we will hear arguments from members and guests of the Wizengamot for a period not to exceed one hour before the votes are cast." Lord Marchbanks looked to the Interim Minister. "Mister Thicknesse, you have the floor."

As Lord Marchbanks surrendered the floor to Mister Thicknesse, Usagi poked Harry in the arm.

"I liked Pluto's idea this morning... a whole Ministry of Magic themed day. She made it sound like it would help me remember names and faces better. Now I'm not so sure. This chair isn't as comfortable as it looked and I'm, like, really hungry."

Harry snickered behind his hand. "There is something to be said for fighting your enemies out in the open. Death Eaters are nice enough to wear those highly visible cloaks and masks after all... their supporters here in this room are harder to deal with. They've had decades... centuries even, to tailor the law to suit their purpose and letting someone like me just up and kick them out isn't going to happen."

"And that's why you are throwing your support behind Lord Greengrass?" Usagi asked.

"And that's why _we_ are throwing _our_ support behind Lord Greengrass. I'm the Boy-Who-Lived-Chosen-One and you are the Crown Princess of the Moon... you're Cinderella for purebloods."

"I'm Cinderella?"

"Well, you would be if you had my relatives instead of your sweet loving family... and if you had the Fairy Godmother's magical power. Come to think of it, the Fairy Godmother is a bit of a lightweight compared to you isn't she?"

Usagi's cheeks flushed at Harry's compliments. She hadn't thought of the Disney Princess angle. Maybe Tokyo Disney would set up a parade for her if she went? At the very least they could give her and the Senshi free day passes right? Wouldn't they see the value in hosting a real teenaged magical princess? If she convinced Hermione and Ginny to come, could they find the park actress playing Aurora that day and reenact the famous blue-pink dress color magic fight from Sleeping Beauty? Usagi would have to ask later.

Interim Minister Thicknesse droned on for another ten minutes before making his closing statements and bowing to the crowd. A fair number of wizards and witches gave the man applause, though little passion showed in their clapping hands. After only a minute or two, Lord Marchbanks reintroduced Damien to the crowd.

It didn't take long for Harry to favor Damien's speech over Pius's. Not that he would have endorsed anyone else for Minister, but Lord Greengrass was quickly proving to have the silver tongue of a pureblood lord as well as a vision of the future that Harry found himself rooting for. He claimed that tradition was to be respected… in fact (and he looked to Usagi when making this point) there were many old traditions neglected and nearly forgotten by even the Ancient and Noble Houses which they would have done well to remember.

"…and it is commonplace now when retelling the legend of Luna, Queen of the Moon, to say that she sacrificed herself for the wizards and witches of her time. _Wizards and witches only_, I ask you? Did she not give up her life and powers that _all mankind_ may survive the Great Fall and rebuild their lives? Until as recently as last month, I have heard pureblood wizards invoke Circe, Selene and even Luna against muggle and muggleborn alike. These intolerant elitists forget that we now have a simple way to test the validity of their statements, though I suppose I shouldn't blame them... who ever thought that the Crown Princess of the Moon would bless the Wizarding World with her presence in our lifetimes?" Damien turned to Usagi as everyone else looked on. "Your Highness, I humbly ask you before my peers in the Wizengamot… what did your mother stand for? Would she have favored magicals over the common man?"

Harry had to hand it to Damien. Lord Greengrass was Slytherin pureblood through and through; either the Greengrass family was secretly lighter than they let on or he was playing his trump card with a showman's flair. Using the word 'bless' instead of 'honor' as if she were some immortal godde- well, wait... she _is_ immortal... and she _can_ bring people back from the dead... so maybe he is kind of justified for saying things that way...

Damien's trump card nearly shot out of her chair, eager to defend her mother's legacy. Half a second later, Harry stood and took her hand in his as a show of support. No one attempted to stop her. After a brilliant eye sparkle display for Harry, Usagi turned to address the magicals before her.

"Members of the Wizengamot... good people of England... listen to me and know that what I say about my mother, Queen Serenity the First, is the truth as I remember it and more importantly as told to me and my Senshi by the spirit of the Queen herself!"

There were some shocked whisperings in the assembled crowd. No one had ever claimed to meet the ghost of Queen Luna in all of recorded history. The assembly went silent as she spoke again.

"I should start with a history lesson- or rather a correction of history to remove a minor error that has cropped up in the past twelve thousand years. First, and I hope you are not disappointed to hear this, but when you speak of Selene, who was called Goddess of the Moon and of Luna, who was called Queen of the Moon, in truth there was only one woman: my mother."

The shocked whisperings returned, lo louder but far more furious in their intensity.

"My mother _was_ Queen of the Moon and the ancient people of the Moon, the Earth and the many planetary settlements inside of Pluto's orbit also knew her as Selene, Goddess of the Moon. I can't say for sure that she was a goddess... being her daughter I have a bit of a bias, I suppose... but as you can see, my mother held both titles and so it is easy to see how stories would bend and shape over time. Sadly, I cannot say anything on the subject of Circe, as I have no memories of such a Goddess nor has my mother spoken of her to me. My aunt, Queen Tranquility, married a phoenix and ruled a kingdom in what is now western China, but that is another story for another day."

Pluto could have stepped in now if she wanted to. She could lecture both Usagi and Magical England on the truth behind more than a few ancient pantheons, but this was not the time. No, let Usagi keep the momentum up and Voldemort will have even fewer followers by sunset than he has now. Perhaps she should go out hunting again soon? Defending the Greengrass family was a refreshing change of pace and Pluto was sure that Shampoo would jump at the chance to fight evil and earn trophies for her tribe.

No one saw Pluto smile, but the hairs on the back of Harry's neck did stand up. He had to struggle not to scratch himself as Magical Britain listened to the young woman standing next to him.

"My mother was... is... a disciple of Love as I am and as my husband is. She ruled with kindness and generosity and would not have tolerated mistreatment of even the least of her subjects. There were **no** slaves in the Silver Millennium... none of her subjects were considered a 'lesser sort' or 'undesirables'. Such evil concepts only survived in the deepest shadows of lands that by treaty my mother could not influence. I firmly believe that had she lived to this day, my mother would use every resource available to not only ensure the prosperity of magical people but non-magical people as well... and she wouldn't stop there! My mother would see to the needs of all life- the centaurs, goblins, house-elves and mermen... and all other species of the world magical or not! Given half a chance, I intend to continue where my mother left off... I will see to the needs of the injured and downtrodden beings of this world until **all** are well fed and healthy and as happy as can be."

A roar of approval swept the room as the assembled wizards and witches of England's magical governing body got lost in the moment. The clapping and shouts of support eventually began to die down. This is something Damien Greengrass was waiting patiently for as he wanted to retake control of the discussion before someone called for the reintroduction of a Magical Monarchy. Damien didn't think such a vote would succeed, but he did expect it to get more votes than this election's loser could take. Before saying anything, Damien took one last look at Dolores Umbridge and drank in the exquisite loathing and anger which washed over the toad's face. The ex-High Inquisitor was quite likely the only person in the room other than Harry and the Crown Princess herself that wasn't still clapping.

"Thank you, Your Highness, for speaking to we wizarding folk today. You honor us greatly. I am especially thankful that you have justified my family's oldest ritual, praying to Luna at every full moon, before the entire Wizengamot."

After a courteous bow, Damien turned from Usagi to address the Wizengamot in general again.

"I stand before you today, members of the Wizengamot, to say that change is coming. Change; something that we as a society have long feared. Our lives will change and we will be better for it. There may still be those of you in this room that heard the Crown Princess speak and dismissed her words as the dreams of a young girl. There may still be some among you that plan to stop her or bind her to your own purpose. To you, I say 'good bye'. 'Good bye' as in you will not last long against the forces arrayed against you. Tom Riddle may have taken advantage of a weakened Ministry and made honest witches and wizards fearful for their futures, but we will become strong once again. Lord and Lady Potter have done more for us than we can ever repay and while they may be willing to do as much again we should not look to them as our only saviors... we should be strong enough to save ourselves!"

Once again, the Wizengamot broke into applause. Damien smiled. The magicals before him never reacted to Pius so well and he'll dance naked around Black Lake before Dolores does better. _Minister _Greengrass. He could already taste it.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes: ** I just re-read Happily Ever After by Jeconais which is a sweet fairytale!Harry/Gabrielle story. I think it may have influenced my Moon Princess speech a little bit. My Usagi treats being a princess and preparing for a future utopian kingdom just as seriously as Gabbi does in that story. One could also say that Jeconais set the bar I aim for when writing my Harry/Gabby story.

**Reviewers: **I'm going to try to change my system here. I'll still reply to my regulars and to anyone who's review is longer than a single unfinished sentence, but I will likely switch to doing PM replies and only running general commentary at the end of each chapter. On the other hand, maybe I'll try more omakes as I've kind of gotten out of the habit. They were fun. Besides, the best advice anyone can give you in life applies right here:

_That's the wonderful thing about being an author, you can put in as many nude women as you'd like:_

_'Meanwhile, the nude ladies continue to dance about.'_

_Peter Cook – Experiences Down the Mine_


	16. Once and Future Enemies

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here. Also, Tomb Raider must belong to someone, even if I'm not them and I'm too lazy right now to figure out who it does belong to.

**Chapter Sixteen****: ****Once and Future Enem****ies**

Brunton, Northumberland

Saturday, January 18th, 1997

Harry looked out of his manor house's massive rear windows. The garden wasn't overgrown anymore, not that it was easy to tell under moderate snow cover. Two elves saw to that. Dobby or Kreacher must have repaired the fountain before winter set in, as there was a spectacular drapery of icicles ringing all three tiers. It almost looked like a wedding cake.

"Bloody handwriting is as bad as yours was, Harry..." Ron muttered behind him.

"Language, Ron." Hermione's voice challenged to one side.

"But this kid can't keep his lettering straight for anything. I can't read half of the essay at all. My head is killing me." Ron put the red ink tipped quill in his hand down and stood up, pushing his chair back to step away for a moment. Hermione chose not to comment again as the irony was too thick to pierce with her wit.

_POP_

"Does Lord Potter's guest require a headache potion?" Kreacher asked, a shiny crystal vial in one hand.

"Don't mind if I do."

Ron took the offered potion and quickly downed it in two swallows. Perhaps a little too quickly. The vial slipped from his fingers when a coughing fit shook his frame. Ever the helpful servant, Kreacher had the vial in his hands before it could shatter on the floor.

_POP_

And then the elf was gone from whence he came.

"Did you bother to check if it was the right color for a headache potion, Ronald?" Luna spoke softly, eyes on the essay before her. "It looked like a diuretic to me."

Ron's coughs only got worse. If Harry had been looking behind him, he would have seen a sly grin on the quirky Ravenclaw's face. She only had to get Ron back for calling her 'Loony' one hundred and eight more times before they were even.

"I need a break." Ron muttered while trying to regain his breath. "Harry _-hack-_ why don't you sit down and grade some of these papers... they were written by your students, mate."

Harry was too engrossed in the snowy garden to answer. Hermione answered for him.

"You agreed to do the work, Ron… and I only gave you the First Year papers on what to do if you see a dark wizard near your home. I also gave you a convenient seven point scoring guide which you had better be using." The curly brown haired Head of Gryffindor House cast an ink drying charm on the paper she just finished marking and set it aside. "You wanted out of the castle, right? This isn't a Hogsmeade weekend, you know. I'm only here right now because I'd be in the office grading papers anyway... and the elves can still find me if one of the lions or staff members have need of me."

"But that still doesn't answer why Har-" Ron's further complaint was cut off as the manor wards began to chime softly.

_POP_

"Visitors is coming to the back garden, Lord Potter. They is on the approved list."

"Thank you, Kreacher." Harry stood up straighter.

As the old Black family elf POP'd away again, a brilliant shaft of multi-colored light slammed into the terrace between the windows and the frozen fountain. A ring of female figures revealed itself as the overpowered rainbow faded into nothingness. Senshi.

-pop-

Harry couldn't wait a second longer and apparated past the windows. He instantly reappeared near the shortest, pinkest magical girl in the circle and picked her bodily off the ground. Hugs time. A bit of girlish shrieking made it past the windows and put a smile on several faces inside.

"That's why, Ron." Hermione paused before taking up the next essay... a N.E.W.T. level one on poison detection. "We're here to relax... Well, you are. I'm here to get some work done and keep an eye on you lot. Harry has family obligations and official business outside of Hogwarts' jurisdiction."

As two thirds of the Golden Trio watched, Harry warmly greeted the Senshi and bid them enter his home.

"Wow, Harry!" Sailor Moon looked around with wide eyes. "This place cleaned up good, huh?"

"Don't give me credit for it," Harry countered, "Dobby and Kreacher both knew I wanted this place livable. They even stopped work on Grimmauld place to get this house up to snuff quicker."

Greetings were exchanged. The full complement of Senshi had come along hoping to see more of England… and magical England in particular. Hogwarts was cool, but there's only so much you can see when on guard duty with your Princess.

As for the Hogwarts regulars in attendance today, turnout was fairly light. Ranma and Shampoo went exploring in the Forbidden Forest at dawn. Daphne and Astoria were both holed up in the school library doing research for charms and transfiguration assignments. Ginny stayed behind in the Gryffindor Common Room to do some revising and Nev stayed behind to… er… 'help' Ginny. Ron was less than pleased with those two recently. As it was, Harry, Hermione, Luna, Ron and Lavender (who absolutely promised not to squee even once) were the only locals who managed to wriggle their way out of McGonagall's grasp for the weekend. Even then, there were conditions to be met. They had to be on call and available, they had to stick to Hogwarts' code of conduct (English country manors have broom closets, don't they?), and they had to get all assigned work dealt with in a timely manner. In spite of the average age of the group, Minerva did take heart that a Head of House and a Professor were officially in attendance. Okay, she _tried_ to take heart in that, but she did at least get a promise from Harry to call for aid if things went pear shaped before they could get back to the castle.

In ones and twos, the Senshi began to drop their transformations and look around the main hall of the old Black family manor. The floor was a highly polished marble masterpiece with intricately cut stones radiating out from a point in the center of the room. The walls were a mix of lightly stained wood paneling and smooth plaster painted in blues and greens. The wood of the grand stair and all exposed roof structure around the clerestory also matched the pattern cut into floor tiles below. Two great crystal chandeliers along with over than a dozen matching sconces provided illumination whenever the giant clear windows failed to provide it.

Usagi sighed in appreciation as she dropped onto a large couch and spread herself out some. "Tell them they do good work then."

POP

"Dobby is thanking Lady Potter Ma'am for her praise… Dobby doesn't deserve it!" The little elf fell to his knees before Usagi.

"Lady Potter Ma'am may also be calling on Dobby and Kreacher whenever and where ever Lady Potter Ma'am is when she is being needing us." Dobby turned in the direction of Harry and his pink haired captive. "We also being waiting on the Little Miss Lady Potter too."

"Thank you!" Usagi chirped, causing Dobby to cry tears of joy. Then she shivered. A t-shirt and jeans wasn't cutting it. "Why am I so cold?"

_-snap-_ FWOOOSH

Dobby snapped his fingers and a pair of fireplaces on opposing walls flared to life. Another snap and the entire stone floor began to radiate heat. He snapped his fingers one last time and two great trays of hot chocolate and warm pumpkin juice appeared floating in the middle of the room.

"Dobby is having what you is needing to warm yourself, Lady Potter Ma'am… you and your friends!"

There was a stampede as the cups of hot chocolate were nearly fought over. It smelled divine. Soon enough, everyone was settled in and relaxed.

"So?" Usagi called over Hermione's shoulder. The English witch had a hot chocolate next to her, a quill in her hand and was just about ready to resume grading the essay in front of her.

"Yes?"

"What happened with your sister?"

Hermione set the quill down, no longer in the mood to review essays.

"Bad news, I'm afraid." Harry called out, putting a hand on Usagi's shoulder and one on Hermione's back as well. "Hermione's parents are fully within their rights to keep Juliet in the muggle world until she becomes of age and is legally independent. And if we're trying to mend the rift between magical and muggle worlds, then getting Minister Greengrass to pull some strings or tweak the law would be a step in the wrong direction, wouldn't it?"

"That... that's terrible!" Usagi's mood dropped, her attention turning fully to the quiet witch before her. "I'm sorry, 'Mione. If there's anything I can do to help, you know I'll do it, right?"

Hermione weakly nodded. "We can wait until she's ready to be on her own and offer to get her tutors... she can still learn magic as long as she's willing to wait out Mum and Da."

Harry and Usagi sat in chairs to either side of Hermione. Cuteness noticed the mood and slipped away to join Hotaru in looking out the windows at the snow covered frozen garden.

"Maybe they can keep her out of Hogwarts... but I'd like to see them try to keep you out of Juliet's life. I think that you should go see her regularly from now on... maybe set up weekly lunch dates or something."

Harry quietly thought about their options for a minute. He could charm her parents to think differently, but then that would make him more like Dumbledore or Riddle, wouldn't it? Well, if Hermione asked him to, he might just do it anyway... but it would have to be her idea.

There were a few uncomfortable minutes as Harry, Usagi and Hermione all sat quietly without saying or doing anything. The others, those who noticed the drama, kept to whispers out of respect. Finally, Hermione couldn't take the quiet any longer and decided to change the subject.

"Usagi?"

"Yes, 'Mione?" The silver haired teen pulled her head off of the table and turned.

"Do you…that is, may I borrow your Lunar Disguise Pen?"

Usagi's eyebrows shot up. So did Harry's for that matter.

"Sure!" The magical girl princess glanced quickly at Harry before returning her gaze to the witch. "What for?"

Hermione sighed.

"I had a Seventh Year Ravenclaw ask me a question in class that I couldn't answer…" Harry jerked in realization. His co-Professor _has_ been out of sorts since that class, hasn't she? Maybe the 'Juliet Situation' or PMS wasn't to blame. "I swore to her that I'd have the answer the very next class, and I did, but I felt so unprepared. I'm not sure I could go on teaching the class knowing that there are more questions out there I can't answer."

Harry put his hand over Hermione's.

"I'll have you know, 'Mione, that your students respect you for admitting when you don't know something; doubly so when you promise to find the answer for them… do you think Quirrell or Lockheart were willing to do that? Umbridge? I think Remus was the only one that had your dedication before the start of this year."

Harry rubbed small circles into Hermione's hand to ease away the tension. Two seats further down the table, Lavender kicked her boyfriend's shin under the table and nodded Hermione's way. Oh, right…

"So maybe Snape knew more about the class than you did. What of it? If you even thought of asking that git a question, he would bite your head off and take points. Headmaster Dumbledore? I doubt you'll find anyone alive who knew as much as he did and could teach as well… but he's Albus Bloody Dumbledore! You can't compare yourself to him, now, can you?" Ron spared a quick glance to his witch. She was smiling; brilliant! "So what's this Luna Pen thing do anyway?"

Usagi reached behind her into Stuffspace™ and retrieved the tacky magical artifact in question. "Hermione needs to call on power of Lunar Disguise Pen and tell it what she wants to become. Simple. Race car driver… pilot… school teacher… photographer… it can make you anyone with any skill until you stop magic again."

The only two blokes in the room both desperately pushed down the urge to ask if 'stripper' or 'porn star' worked too, but only just. Well, Ron may not have thought of those exact terms, but the Wizarding World has their own versions of both to be sure.

Hermione accepted the glittery pink plastic shaft with trepidation. It still felt like cheating but she was really feeling the pressure and she knew Harry couldn't do it alone.

"Thank you. I'll take good care of it." Hermione said before sliding the magical device into her bookbag. Usagi nodded behind her, happy to be so helpful.

Harry took a moment to pull out his trophy wand and summon a parchment off of the table.

"Love? Setsuna? I've received an invitation… a summons really… for a big to do in the muggle world." He took the parchment, unfolded it and presented it for Usagi's inspection. Hotness leaned in over her princess's shoulder to read over it at the same time. "It says that Queen Elizabeth is meeting with Emperor Akihito at Buckingham Palace and our presence is requested as representatives of the international magical community."

Several heads turned at that.

"Looks like Damien is getting a summons too." Harry commented after reading a bit further down. "Her Majesty is giving me some control over the size and makeup of the magical delegation so long as I give her staff sufficient notice to plan accordingly."

"The statute, mate…" Ron cautioned, "This sounds like it could get you in trouble with the International Confederation of Wizards."

"The Queen obviously knows about magic as does the Emperor," Harry mused, "but their staff and security could be a sticky point."

"We don't really know how many muggles know about our world, Harry." Hermione added. "When you RSVP, you should voice your concerns and make a polite request that they not include anyone on their side that doesn't already know... for legal reasons. Quote the statute if you have to."

Hotness spoke up from behind Harry. "May I suggest notifying the I.C.W. as well? They may feel better about this meeting if we gave them some advance warning."

"Not that I'll let them say 'no'." Harry countered. "I'll not refuse my queen nor will I let down Akihito, not for a bunch of stuffy old wizards."

"Do I get to wear my kimono again?" Usagi looked hopefull. The gown was spectacular, after all.

"I wouldn't recommend it, Your Highness." Setsuna answered. "We need to project our power and goals... image will have an impact. Wearing your kimono would imply loyalty to Japan above loyalty to your own Kingdom. We are looking for equality, not subservience."

Usagi pouted. She needed another excuse to wear that kimono. "Fine, but isn't there some dance or ball or party coming up soon?"

"Not that I know of..." Harry drifted off in thought.

The young wizard looked back fondly at the last Yule Ball- at least he looked back fondly at the ball part of it. Dancing with Usagi and the others was surprisingly fun.

"'Mione?" Harry called.

"Yes?" She didn't look up from her work.

"How much advanced notice would the Headmistress need to organize a ball?"

Hermione looked up for that one. She looked thoughtful... more thoughtful than usual anyway.

"She could announce one with no advance warning if she so chose, Harry. What you want is to give staff and students enough warning to prepare for it... a trip into Hogsmeade for robe shopping and the like... and give them a chance to get their dates lined up..."

"What if we had a Valentine's Day Ball? Girl's could go into Hogsmeade the weekend before, right?" Harry asked.

"Yesssssss!" Lavender shouted from further down the table. She turned to Hermione. "Pleasesayyes, pleasesayyes, pleasesayyes!"

"That might work." Hermione actually sounded hopeful about the ball. "I'll bring it up at the next weekly staff meeting."

Thinking it a nearly done deal, Harry turned to his Crown Princess. "Love?"

"Yes?" Usagi sipped on her hot chocolate as she eagerly awaited the next question.

"Do you think Annabelle would want to go with me to the Valentine's Ball?"

Warm brown liquid spewed out of Usagi's mouth, lightly coating Harry's face and causing a wave of shrieks and giggles around the room.

It would take nearly an hour to get Usagi to so much as look in Harry's direction again, but Cuteness stuck by him the whole time. She thought it was really funny.

* * *

A massive lightning bolt crashed through the darkness followed almost immediately by a great peel of thunder.

In the freezing rain... in weather that threatened to kill anyone foolish enough to stand on a hilltop and chant... a pair of cloaked wizards chanted and moved as prescribed by the phase of the cloud obscured moon above.

"...elgapelle swappen elgapelle bell aggep hanuajh..."

A flat stone slab resting at the very crest of the hill seemed to be the focus of their ritual. Or rather, not the stone slab itself but the nude woman tied to its surface. She actually stopped writhing, screaming and begging some thirty minutes ago... at about the time that biting wind and freezing rain sucked the will to fight clean out of her. Various elements, reagents and bits of human flesh were placed about her body in a precise pattern.

Not a good night to be a pureblood witch in the service of the Dark Lord.

"Elgapelle!" Voldemort roared, wand held high.

Lighting cracked through the sky. The two wizards fought to stand upright as a bolt of raw electrical current seemed to leap out of the witch's chest and connect to the clouds above. Her body arched and shook as Mother Nature cut a path through her chest with plasma.

Both wizards stopped their chanting and approached the nude woman.

"It worked." One said.

"No." The other replied. "She's dead."

Voldemort looked at the witch's body. She was a proper lady of the Parkinson line... good breeding stock. Gone. As a consolation for her sacrifice, Voldemort would allow the Parkinson men to raid a pureblood home of their choosing to recoup their losses. As such an attack would also sew terror and discord among his enemies; this was a win-win scenario for the Dark Lord.

"It was the lightning, My Lord." Rookwood pulled down his hood after charming himself against the weather. "She was still alive when the link formed... and it _did_ form just before that last bolt struck."

Gone, but perhaps not wasted. This was their third attempt, each one costing Voldemort a female follower.

"Go back over the equations. Look for some way to better protect the witch during the ceremony. I want to shield the site if we can next time." Voldemort commanded. He took one last look at the pale form of his ex-follower before casting fiendfyre at her corpse. "I will not risk Bella like this."

Not that Voldemort would have allowed this witch to survive past the end of the ritual one way or the other. She couldn't be trusted the same way Bellatrix could. The Pureblood Agenda wasn't enough any longer; his status as the Heir of Slytherin meant less than it did even a few months ago. His support base was only held together by the threat of horrific suffering for any fool that should try to escape his service. What he needed was a servant with unwavering devotion and unbeatable power. He needed a Senshi tied to his will.

The next full moon would be in late February. They would be ready.

Soon, Voldemort would have the weapon he needs to bring down Potter and the Moon Princess. The Wizarding World would submit to his rule, or it would be consumed by darkness.

* * *

Astoria stared open mouthed at the scene before her, as did her whole class.

"Now as we learned last class," Hermione continued from her perch on the front edge of her desk, "there are three basic ways to overcome a ward. Can anyone tell me what they are?"

Astoria looked on in silence. She had the answer, but somehow her arm failed to rise from her side. Hermione hopped off her desk and crossed both arms under her bust.

At her move, half of the class sucked in a breath of air they didn't know they needed. The male half.

Hermione's hair was pulled back in a tight braid, all except for a few strands which drew attention to her eyes… assuming the students could manage to look that high. She wasn't wearing robes. Instead, she had on a skin tight sleeveless olive top over a black sports bra, neither of which covered her bare midriff. Instead of a skirt, she had on a pair of tight shorts which just barely covered her arsecheeks. In fact, the matched pair of nylon pistol holsters (one on each thigh) covered more skin. Yes, dual pistol holsters complete with a pair of nickel plated 9mm semi-automatic shoot-you-dead handguns. A dragon hide wand holster covered half of her left forearm and fingerless leather gloves covered her hands. Long, smooth legs dropped into a pair of hiking boots with socks that stopped well short of her knees.

This was the best D.A.D.A. class the Fourth Year boys ever had, and they weren't learning a damn thing.

"Anyone?" Hermione clasped her hands together behind her back... while breathing in at the same time.

The boys all hissed. One Slytherin boy on the front row fainted, crashing to the floor.

Astoria watched Professor Granger step over to the unconscious student and bend over to do a light medical scan. Back at the professor's desk, her other professor went red in the face as Professor Granger accidentally showed him just how short those shorts were. Was that a thin line of blood dripping from his nose? Well, he's pinching it closed now.

"Yes, ummm..." Harry called as Hermione Enervated her student and helped the boy back into his seat, "I want everyone to review chapter seven... the part on cursebreaking... for the next ten minutes as Herm- Professor Granger and I discuss a few things."

Astoria watched her two professors exchange a few meaningful glances and head jerks before Professor Granger finally followed The-Boy-Daphne-Shagged-First into their office.

"Bow chicka bow wow!" A Gryffindor boy 'sang' nearby. Two of his friends laughed and hit him on the shoulder.

"What's that supposed to mean?" A Slytherin boy two seats behind Astoria asked the gryffies.

"It's a muggle thing." He replied.

Astoria rolled her eyes. She knew what the boy meant by his song. She's learned a lot of weird things hanging out with gryffies and muggleborns ever since Harry Potter entered her life. Very weird things like the meaning of 'bow chicka bow wow'.

On the other side of the D.A.D.A. office door, Harry turned to his co-professor.

"I don't think it's working right. What did you ask for?" He asked.

"What do you mean?" Hermione knew something was off... the students weren't answering her questions very quickly... but she was sure she had their attention.

"Well," Harry countered, "What did you wish for?"

"You don't 'wish for' something, Harry. Honestly. You tell the Disguise Pen to 'turn you into' someone."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Sorry. I can see how that makes a big difference."

Hermione huffed.

"You didn't tell it to turn you into a D.A.D.A. professor, did you?" Harry pressed on.

"Well... no. I didn't."

Hermione absently reached back to play with the braid that stopped just below her shoulders; her bottom lip pushed forward into an adorable pout. Harry fought valiantly to keep from fainting due to blood redistribution.

"Would you mind telling me what you did wish for?"

Hermione glared, but didn't correct him again. She was starting to see his point; calling to be the wrong person could have affected her performance as a professor and _that_ made her uncomfortable.

"I... I was reading through one of the cursebreaking manuals we found in the Room of Requirement. There was a section on specialty cursebreakers who mix muggle and magical techniques... sometimes even muggles can be successful if they are professionally trained and have a natural talent for it."

Harry looked at the very muggle pistols gracing Hermione's soft yet firm... bloody... _focus on the guns, not the thighs, Potter!_

"So you, umn, asked the pen to make you a muggle cursebreaker?"

"Honestly, Harry." It was Hermione's turn to roll her eyes. "I said muggles could do it, not that I had to be a muggle to do it... and the term is 'tomb raider', thank you very much."

"Tomb raider?" Harry's brow scrunched up in concentration. "Where have I heard that term before?"

Thousands of kilometers away, deep in the Amazonian rainforest, a British woman wearing the same outfit Hermione had on (down to the exact same caliber of pistol she carried) sneezed. This was bad.

She lost her grip on the sheer rock face she was scaling and began the three hundred foot drop into crocodile infested waters below.

Halfway down, she managed to twist herself into a swan dive with both pistols lined up on the bloody great crocs that were even now jockeying for position to dine on her flesh.

_CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK - CRACK – CRACK_

SPLOOOOSH

Half of the crocks were dead. The other half were now hungry _and_ angry.

Back in Scotland, two teens looked at each other.

"Maybe I should try again with 'world's best D.A.D.A. professor'?" Hermione suggested.

"Sounds good." Harry answered.

"Harry?"

"Yeah, 'Mione?"

"I'm not changing again until you leave the room."

No naked whirly light show for Harry. Pout. Pout. Pout.

Harry eventually went back out to the classroom. Hermione would follow him a minute later with a new wardrobe and a new angle. Now she could really get her lecture on.

* * *

February 14th, 1997

6:00 PM

"I don't know why I agreed to this." Hermoine fretted as she paced back and forth in front of the main entry doors to Hogwarts castle.

"Agreed to what, Professor Granger?" Headmistress McGonagall asked as she split her time between watching the door and watching well dressed student couples stream into the Great Hall.

The entry hall was acting as a collection point for couples to meet and gossip before officially starting their evening date. There were also a few dozen students meandering about who were too young to attend the ball... or too single to brave such a romantic atmosphere.

Hermione blushed, the rose tint dropping below her face, down her neck, and showing on all of the skin that her periwinkle robes allowed to show. "A blind date, Headmistress."

The Scotswoman turned to stare incredulously at the youngest Head of House Hogwarts has employed since 1632. _That_ one got her position by bearing the Headmaster's son in the middle of her O.W.L. exams. Her Headmaster/ soon-to-be husband was relatively young himself and a Hufflepuff alum, thus the loyalty to his lover and child. Needless to say, had he been Slytherin, the witch would have had an 'accident' long before showing, let alone giving birth.

"A blind date? You?" Minerva forgot about the students milling about and checking each other out.

"Usagi can be very persistent, especially when all of her Senshi guards also hammer me relentlessly. I just gave in to get some peace and quiet."

The main entry doors opened, attracting everyone's attention. As soon as there was enough room, Sailor Mars and Sailor Mercury entered Hogwarts in Senshi uniform. Immediately behind them, Venus and Jupiter pranced in wearing full ballroom dress gowns, the very same gowns they wore at the Yule Ball. Then Harry and Usagi entered.

"Oh, wow!" There were several exclamations and gasps.

Usagi was wearing her New Year's celebration kimono. While some pictures had made it into wizarding circulation, actually seeing one of the most exotic and well crafted kimonos on Earth matched with Usagi's silver magical princess hair was a shock to many locals. Equally shocking was Harry's traditional black and grey striped Japanese hakama with matching outer kimono.

"Welcome, Your Highness! It is an honor to host you this Valentine's Day!"

The Headmistress dipped into a light curtsey. With the Crown Princess spending more time in Japan or otherwise out of the castle of late, Minerva felt it prudent to be more formal in light of the circumstances.

"I am very glad to be here, Headmistress." Usagi giggled behind a hand held fan. "And I thank you for speaking with Pluto. If we can just wait a moment longer our other guests will arrive."

Usagi turned to Hermione, and as she did her smile got brighter and gained an 'I know something you don't know' component. "Oh, you are such a lucky girl!"

Hermione was getting nervous. Alright, Hermione was getting even more nervous than she already was. It felt like the O.W.L. exams all over again. Sure, she knew that Harry couldn't ask Hermione to this ball; not in place of Usagi and certainly not at the same time as Usagi. Tonight, Hermione would truly know what it felt like to lose Harry to another girl. Pity she couldn't wallow in misery alone. As a Head of House and as a Professor, she was required to attend the ball officially as a chaperone and role model. She had already given up on going to Hogsmeade tomorrow when all of the daytime Valentine's Day dates would occur, but tonight she would have to grin and bear it... stiff upper lip and all that... or so she thought.

She must have forgotten the lengths Usagi and Harry were willing to go through for those they loved, and both made it clear to her in no uncertain terms that she was loved. They brainstormed getting Pluto to run Harry through the ball twice, once with each girl, but gave it up as technically difficult and socially questionable. Pluto _was_ part of the final answer, or so Harry said... vaguely... when Hermione finally broke down and gave in to Usagi's demands. Something about connections and not powers.

She was too far into her nervous fit to notice the main doors open again. She also missed the rhythmic thumping of boots marching up the steps and into Hogwarts proper.

She didn't miss the booming call given when the marching stopped.

"Announcing His Royal Highness Prince William of Wales!"

Hermione's head snapped up, a look of shock on her face. To be fair, most of the students and staff within earshot were equally shocked.

In front of her was a detachment of English Royal Guards in full dress uniform. Their spotless red coats were bracketed by black trousers and boots below and large black bearskin hats above. And the rifles... mustn't forget the assault rifles with shiny pointy bayonets attached.

And then a young and dashing, dare we say charming, prince entered Hogwarts followed by a rear guard detachment.

Before Christmas Holiday, this visit by a muggle Royal and his muggle guards may have been too much for Malfoy or one of his Junior Death Eater mates to pass up. Hexing the second in line to the throne of England would have resulted in a quick and deadly armed response and would also have horribly soured magical-muggle relations, but fortunately things have changed since then.

All of the muggleborns and half-bloods in the room quickly shook off their shock and bowed or curtseyed before their prince. Taking the hint, a majority of purebloods in the crowd followed their lead.

Prince William began by introducing himself to Crown Princess Usagi and her husband Lord Potter as they had not strayed far from the door.

Hermione was, of course, a great devotee of public authority figures long before she met Minerva McGonagall and Albus Dumbledore... long before Magical England soured her on The Establishment. Before learning that she was a witch, she was a complete and total fan-girl for Margaret Thatcher and the House of Windsor. And now the young teen prince (squee), second in line to the throne of England (squee), was standing right in front of Hermione! (more squee)

"Miss Granger?" Prince William called. Sure he was three years her junior, but that didn't stop Hermione from blushing heavily at his call.

"Yes, Your Highness?" Okay, she could keep from actually squeeing as long as she stayed in control of her inner little girl. Keep it impersonal and stick to official Hogwarts business and you'll do fine, lass.

Prince William held out a single long stem rose. "Would you do me the honor of attending this Valentine's Day Ball with me?"

"Squee- I mean yes! I mean- oh, bother!"

Dozens of light giggles and laughs echoed around the witch. There was also a cat call or two. Hermione blushed heavily. One of her panic-fight/flight sub-routines took hold causing her to look in Harry's direction.

Harry was all smiles and winked as soon as he saw her look his way. Next to him, Usagi held up both hands; one showing V for victory and the other flashing her fan, the Union Jack showing on its face.

Perhaps tonight wouldn't be the horrible pageant of things-Hermione-can't-have she expected it to be.

Just wait 'till Mum and Da saw one of Colin's pictures from tonight! Hermione was going to make sure Juliet watched her parent's faces when they saw pictures of their Great Disappointment linked arm in arm with the future King of England.

Squee.

* * *

Half way 'round the planet, six people ground against each other in the center of a dance floor three stories below the streets of Tokyo. Sweat earned through hours of dancing, drinking and dancing again rolled down their bodies.

The center of the floor had been claimed early in the night and fiercely defended from all challengers, but sometimes that wasn't enough space and the more athletic couple would occasionally take ownership of a club dancer's platform and try to one-up each other on the skin buffed pole. The other four would watch as the redhead and her purple tressed wife used natural talents and hard earned skills to display the most rare martial art form known to human history: ki-adept club dancing.

The next pair were more conventional in their dancing yet no less energetic. A lithe young woman with seafoam green hair locked eyes with her bishonen cute blonde partner and the world around them seemed to vanish as far as they were concerned.

If the first couple was dynamic and the second couple was an anchor unbroken in the turbulent sea of humanity, then it was the third couple which seemed to take on all comers and send them away broken and defeated. The man wore black slacks and a black shirt that was nearly painted on. And if his shirt was painted on, then her dress must have been a tattoo and not a particularly large one at that. Her thigh length dark green hair hid more of her body than the dress did. Their dance was hard and intense; they could have started fucking right there in the middle of the club and none of the voyeurs watching would have been surprised.

As popular as the club was, as popular as going out on a Friday night and on Valentine's Day was, the real draw to that club for hours on end was those three couples. Never before had the hard partying populace of Tokyo seen two girls light up the room with full body coronas of their own lifeforce while four friends also glowed with the sigils of planetary avatars.

Nabiki would have been shitting raw platinum the next morning with this story if Pluto hadn't already drunk her under the table. As it was, photographs would quickly make it into the local gossip magazines with undeniable proof that Uranus and Neptune were committed and that Pluto had officially staked her claim on Moon's ex-boyfriend.

Earlier, two young magical girls went to Grandmother Tsukino's house for a slumber party. As long as Ikuko promised to keep her young charges on the right side of the family wards, the elder Senshi and martial artists could let loose for one night.

Bow chicka bow wow.

* * *

February 22nd, 1997

Consciousness returned.

She opened her eyes to see the grey sky below her and the frozen, lifeless hill above. No, wait. Her head was hanging off the stone dais she was bound to. Her nude body protested this treatment early on, but her mind would not allow such pitiful things as rope bindings or cold wind to affect her. Most of all, she would never protest her Lord binding her flesh himself without assigning one of the lesser worms to such a task. She lived for those rare moments when he commanded her personally and she would gladly give to him freely anything he desired.

"How do you feel, Bella?" A deep, powerful voice called from one side. Her Lord's wand was in her face for the briefest of moments

She slowly closed her eyes and basked in the attention her Lord paid her as he personally undid the ties binding her to the frozen stone. Ice crystals still held her in places, but she cared not in the least, not when his hands were on her.

She was in pain, but then she loved pain. She loved feeling pain, she loved seeing others in pain and she lived to give pain to others. To feel pain was to truly feel alive and so she set out to make anyone she met understand her passion by feeling life to the utmost.

"I feel wonderful, My Lord."

Bella forced herself upright. As firm as the ice's grip was on her body, some small patches of skin chose to remain on the dais rather than on her back.

"I am pleased to hear that, my dear Bella." Voldemort stood before her. Rookwood stood some few paces further back. "Rise."

She did. With a sweep of his wand, her injuries were healed and warmth reentered her near frozen body. Another wave and black silk coiled around the woman constricting into a form fitting gown that covered her from chest to knees. A pair of black silk ribbons wound around her feet and up each calf in imitation of ballet slippers.

His magic warmed her, yet she would have been fine in the cold. He used his magic on her, for her... _that_, she silently thanked him for over and over again with her eyes. Now there were only two items in his hands, a wand and a jeweled choker. The Dark Lord held up the choker, intent clear.

"My Lord," Bella called even as she held her own hair out of the way and stuck her neck out further. "I swear on my soul that such a toy is not needed. I am yours."

Nevertheless, her Lord placed the enchanted submission choker around her neck, sealing the clasp with a single drop of his own oily, reddish-black blood. "Once bitten, twice shy, my Bella. I never make the same mistake twice."

"Yes Master." She cooed.

Voldemort smiled, pointed teeth showing, and moved closer to the woman until his mouth was even with her ear.

"You have shown me more loyalty and devotion than any ten others... even Rookwood's usefulness and loyalty are suspect compared to you, my dear."

Her lids dropped as she soaked in his presence. His next line was almost a whisper.

"I need a demonstration, Bella. Prove to me that you are the greatest jewel in the crown of my empire."

There was nothing of note on this hill and Bellatrix knew it; there was only her, her Master, Rookwood and the stone dais.

"You say that his loyalty is in question, Master?"

"That, and his usefulness is at an end. He knows too much."

"I would be honored to tie up your loose end, Master."

Voldemort took one step backwards and returned Bella's wand.

In the blink of an eye, her wand was pointed at Rookwood's chest.

In that same instant, before Rookwood could even show surprise on his face, black lighting arced out from Bella's wand and blew the cloaked man apart. His body fell to the earth in bloody red chunks.

She turned to her Master and nearly died of pleasure as he ran a single bare finger over her forehead. She closed her eyes and leaned into the gesture. Voldemort growled in anticipation of his impending victory. After closely studying Bella's new down turned black crescent moon sigil, he released the glamour he had cast over his own forehead.

Let them all see now… let them see the mark of true darkness.

* * *

March 1st, 1997

Three black limousines approached Buckingham Palace. They approached without fanfare or notice in spite of the paparazzi which lined the way. Not a photo was taken. Notice-me-not charms are wonderful things.

When Hermione first asked why the car ride in, Auror Moody explained that all Royal households and many other government buildings had wards on them which were not unlike Hogwarts or Ministry wards even if they were much weaker. A strong enough witch or wizard could force their way through if they knew where to aim and tried hard enough, but even then apparation and portkey travel was dicey and prone to failure.

The limos arrived at their destination unmolested and stopped, one at a time, at the southern entrance on Embassador's Court. Palace staff opened the car doors, allowing the Magical World's representatives to step out and enter the palace with assistance from special escorts, squibs mostly, who were well versed in the Wizarding World. Unlike Hogwarts Castle, there would be no rude gawkers, elitist snobs or shameless flirts here. Strictly professional, the lot of them.

Ranma was the first to step out of a car. He quickly scanned the staff, guards and grounds and came to the conclusion that no hidden threats were waiting in ambush so far. Shampoo stepped out next followed by Mercury, Venus and Jupiter. If any of these five even suspected trouble, a linked portkey set would immediately take all fifteen magicals away from harm in a heartbeat.

As the first five entered the Palace, the next limo pulled up to the curb. Aurors Tonks and Moody exited the car first followed closely by Minister Greengrass and an I.C.W. representative from France. Only just before the car ride, Harry was formally introduced to Monsieur Delacour, who proceeded to give the young man a pair of cheek kisses for pulling his daughter Gabrielle out of Black Lake some three years ago.

The last limo pulled up and opened its doors. Mars got out followed by Hermione, Pluto and Saturn. Finally, Harry stepped out of the car and offered his hand to Usagi as she exited in turn. As they walked between rows of Royal Guards standing at attention, a Palace staffer briefly introduced himself and proceeded to act as a guide for their short trip through increasingly restricted corridors and checkpoints.

In a way, both Harry and his mother before him were right. The Non-magicals in charge did know more about the Wizarding World than they let on.

Over the centuries, many hundreds of squibs were cast out of English pureblood houses to fend for themselves amidst the muggles of England. Muggleborns were ejected from the world they were born to join in equal numbers much of the time as well. Add these two facts together and you get a small but significant population of English subjects only too willing to work for the Crown and Parliament as spies and sleeper agents inside the Wizarding World.

Harry's tour guide could neither confirm nor deny the possibility of Mr. Filch being such an agent.

In Nineteen eighty-one, the Crown was only weeks away from starting their own offensive when Voldemort fell to baby Harry. Once word got out that the Dark Lord was back last summer, voices began to call for new plans to be drawn up. Harry and the Senshi beat the Crown in the race to make first contact by a few months by their way of thinking.

"Lord Potter! Over here, please."

Harry looked away from his informal history lesson to see Kingsley Shacklebolt waving for his attention. The large bald auror must be part of palace security as he wasn't in any of the limos.

Harry walked over with Usagi and shook the auror's hand.

"Lord Potter-" Kinglsey said again, but Harry cut in.

"That's Harry to you."

Kingsley grinned, but shook his head just the same. "Not here it isn't." He turned and bowed to Usagi. "Your Highness… we have about fifteen minutes before your group is to be announced. Queen Elizabeth is currently greeting Their Majesties, the Emperor and Empress of Japan in the next room. In the mean time, we have a buffet set up along the far wall and plenty of comfortable seating available."

During his small speech, Kingsley pointed out the door to the meeting room and the buffet in turn. Harry turned around to see old Mad Eye waving his wand over the buffet line… constant vigilance.

"'Mione." Harry called from behind his best friend. She didn't move. "Hermione?" No answer.

Harry walked around the teenaged Head of House, who was wearing a tailored business dress courtesy of Mrs. Tonks and jewelry courtesy of Lady Greengrass, only to find that she had her eyes closed and seemed to silently practicing a speech to herself.

She almost screamed when he put his hand on her shoulder.

"Harry!" Hermione gasped. "What is it?"

"I just wanted to see how you are doing." Hermione glared daggers at the young wizard lord. "You are about to meet your last date's grandmother, you know…" She blushed and glared some more.

"We didn't come here to see Prince William, Harry. I rather doubt he's here. They like to keep some room between the Queen and her heirs just in case the worst should happen." Hermione whispered. "And I still think this speech should be coming out of your mouth today. They didn't schedule this meeting to hear a dentist's daughter from Kent drone on about facts and figures."

Harry smiled. "They did schedule this meeting to hear about the magical world and its current health. Usagi will speak from her heart as she always does, God bless her. I'll speak of the current conflict and our goals for the future. You… you, Miss Brightest Witch of Our Age… you are going to argue that this isn't just a scam and it isn't just a dream. You will provide examples and logic enough to prove that what Usagi and I want is possible."

Hermione still didn't look convinced. To be fair, this oral exam was a bit more important than her future N.E.W.T. scores… if by 'a bit' you mean 'several orders of magnitude'. No pressure, yeah?

"Look." Harry locked gazes with his 'Mione. "If any one of the three of us slips, I'm sure Pluto can and will back us up. Former First Adviser to the queen of an inter-planetary space empire, remember? This is what she's good at. In fact, I don't doubt she'll do more talking than the three of us put together… and Damien and Monsieur Delacour will be taking some of the heat too."

Hermione didn't respond. She knew she wouldn't have enough time to do so before Minister Greengrass came up to their group.

"Ah, there you are Harry." Damien called, putting a hand on Harry's shoulder. "I just got the nod from Auror Shacklebolt. It's time."

Harry quickly nodded to Damien before turning back around to Hermione. He put a quick kiss on the very edge of her lips and took her hand in his before turning for Usagi and Monsieur Delacour who were talking near the buffet table.

"Let's get Usagi, 'Mione. It's showtime."

As Harry pulled Hermoine through the room, one thought kept going through the blushing witches mind. '_Prince William better grow up, fill out, and sweep me off my feet double quick, because as it stands he's got nothing on Harry.'_

* * *

Voldemort sat on his throne in the Grand Ballroom of Riddle (nee Malfoy) Manor as one of his servants twitched uselessly on the floor before him.

These pathetic pureblood dark wizards were beginning to be more trouble than they were worth.

As he watched the worthless fool curl in on himself in the final throes of death by nerve melting curse, the main doors opposite him opened.

"Ah, Bella." Voldemort hissed. "Right on time, as always."

The witch, bound to him by dark passion and darker magic hummed in pleasure at his praise before approaching and prostrating herself at his feet.

"At least you know your place... those fools scurry like rats in the sewer at the approach of a snake." The Dark Lord looked again at the wizard curled on the floor. He was finally still. "This one did have something useful to report before he died."

Kissing his boot, Bella asked, "May I slay them for you Master? You deserve better."

"Now now, Bella." The Dark Lord snorted. "Who will I rule if we kill everyone? Every ruler needs servants no matter how vile and distasteful the ungrateful beasts truly are. I do, however, have a task for you."

Bella smiled like a child approaching the bounty of gifts under their tree on Christmas morning. "Will I be hurting filth in your name, Master?"

Voldemort smiled. It was a smile that only Bellatrix could think positive in any way. Lucky for her, she was there to see it.

"Oh, thank you Master. I won't disappoint you."

* * *

Harry Potter sat in an assembly of in-the-know muggles, squibs, muggleborns, half-bloods, pureboods and magical girls. He saw before him commoners, soldiers, diplomats, lords, ministers and royal houses. No pressure, mate. At least the people gathered together today were more professional than your average crowd in Diagon Alley. Everyone looked, but they didn't stare at Usagi or oggle the Senshi or even comment on Auror Tonks' dress robes or pink hair.

Introductions were made and promises of friendship and peaceful co-existence were made... Harry went the extra mile to swear a binding magical oath on his promises; something he knew was a risk. With any luck, that was the largest risk he'd be running today.

Minister Greengrass took the stage after the opening rounds to give as detailed and accurate a report of the status of Magical England (including territories outside of the British Isles) as Harry had ever heard. It was likely that no Minister of Magic had been so honest or forthcoming to an English monarch since the Kingdoms of England, Scotland and Ireland were separate entities. He included much of the recent troubles with the terrorist Tom Riddle and his fifteen year long rivalry with Harry Potter. Damien knew Harry and Usagi were ready to change the world with or without the I.C.W.'s stamp of approval and he went with it.

Following his address, he yielded the floor to Sailor Pluto who once again explained the existence and fall of the Silver Millennium as well as the recent rise of the Sailor Senshi and their current status... namely her Crown Princess's betrothal to Lord Harry James Potter.

When Pluto finished her speech, there was a question and answer period which had the Queen of England, the Emperor of Japan and their chosen advisors asking far more questions than either Harry or Usagi could possibly think of let alone answer. Thank God Pluto was the one answering. Surely they could ask Hermione or Pluto to rehash the debates later. Monsieur Delacour answered several queries about the Wizarding World outside of English and Japanese borders; in fact the man answered more questions than many though he would. Apparently the I.C.W. wasn't sold on full disclosure just yet, but they were willing to discuss the concept in light of modern advances. Chief among those advances was a whole slew of technologies that the Wizarding World was beginning to have trouble evading. You can't Obliviate satellites in orbit or the technicians monitoring their progress and unplottable wards weren't crafted with modern technologies in mind.

After a brief lunch, the full complement of royals and dignitaries assembled to hear the Crown Princess of the Moon speak her mind for the first time since introductions were made. She spoke from the heart as anyone who knew her could tell you she would. She also spoke in English. She was _almost_ fluent without the translation ring now; just as Harry was with Japanese.

Usagi started with a brief description of her life before magic; her childhood spent daydreaming of love and noble princes that would sweep her off her feet to ensure she lived happily ever after. At that point, she pinned her super dreamy smile on Harry and commented on how surprisingly accurate her daydreams turned out to be, only getting the nationality of her Prince Charming wrong.

Those who found it socially acceptable to laugh or giggle in the presence of three royal houses did so.

She finished by stating her intent to rebuild her queen mother's ancient kingdom- peacefully, mind you- and actively work towards the utopia that most people believe impossible for humanity to achieve.

And then she handed the reins to Harry.

Harry also began with a brief description of his life before magic and everyone was thankful for his brevity. No doubt the Dursley family would be getting an official visit soon. Where Usagi's tale was one of love, peace and harmony both in the past and future, Harry's tale spoke of the consequences of blood supremacy, ignorance, predjudice and corruption. Whole bloodlines were sacrificed to the war; lines like Potter, Longbottom, Black, Bones and Peverell were either on their last leg or gone altogether. And now the same social disease was once again seeking to overwhelm a society that until recently seemed unable to admit that anything was amiss. If anything, Harry played down Voldemort's role. A Dark Lord was inevitable, he said, if not Riddle, then one of the Malfoys or a similar family who knew how to play the Ministry while slaughtering innocents without pause.

Harry was careful not to paint too poor a picture of his magical guardian, Minister Greengrass. The Ministry _was_ trying to turn around; if only Damien's reforms were in effect earlier... decades earlier... then this may have been avoided. He even managed a repeal of the law making it illegal to check criminal suspects for the Dark Mark. Even with the recent changes, Wizarding England was in a bad spot.

Then less than a year ago, a fluke of magical discharge unmatched in Hogwarts: A History (Hermione checked, it's true) sent Harry straight from his front step in Surrey to Usagi's ghostly waiting arms in the Middle of Nowhere, China. That unscheduled trip through China and Japan became the turning point Harry needed; it gave him a light to guide him through the darkness. That light's name was Usagi. Now, they share a vision. It isn't just putting down a Dark Lord in England though that is the first step. His sights are set on nothing short of fixing the root causes of Dark Lords: magical society's imperfections, biased laws and corrupt systems. And if words aren't enough to keep the Riddles and Malfoys and Lestranges honest, then he's willing to take up wand and sword and give his opponents a swift kick in the arse.

And what is the most important step in eliminating the Dark Lord problem? Modernization. Gradually negating and removing one of the Wizarding World's biggest legal mandates since 1692: The International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy.

"…and so I believe that wizards are wrong to claim that reintegrating into the non-magical world is a guarantee of enslavement and persecution. It won't be easy, I grant you that, but we have to get everyone thinking that magic is not a supernatural oddity but a naturally occurring energy like electricity or light… only it's less understood and much more flexible. Wizards and witches are people with a set of skills not unlike researchers and engineers and doctors. _Of course_ the non-magical world will want to use magic to their benefit… who wouldn't? This just means that they'll be willing to pay for magical services like they would for any other professional service…"

In the seating behind Harry, Sailor Mercury suddenly looked to the side and activated her Mercury Computer linked visor. Several people took notice of her move. Mercury leaned forward from her seat just behind Usagi and Pluto.

".. now, I'm only able to say this to you today because Japan has always been outside of I.C.W. control. It was there that I was able to use my magic in concert with the Senshi to pre- do you have something to say, Sailor Pluto?"

Harry noticed that Hotness was now standing up. The Senshi around her were whispering heatedly to each other and it looked like they were all about to leave their seats. Ranma and Shampoo both vanished into thin air.

"Lord Potter. Honorable members of this assembly. We have evidence of a magical threat approaching from the West." Murmurs began to spread and several mixed groups of security personnel moved to spread the alarm, most notably the red coated soldiers which were even now sounding the call to other Royal Guard units.

"What is it?" Harry asked Pluto, hands falling to his wands.

Mercury answered. "We have a weak avatar level power overlapping a magical core fifteen hundred meters distant at two eight four degrees. The energy signature is somewhere between Tuxedo Mask and Black Moon Family patterns. Target unknown but assumed hostile. I recommend we make contact outside."

Harry and Usagi locked gazes as the room around them broke into organized chaos. Harry quickly cut his gaze to the three other sovereigns in the room before looking back at his Love. She nodded before turning to spit out orders.

"_Saturn. Pluto. You're staying with me and I'm staying with the other royals."_ Usagi turned to her dearest friends. _"Mercury. Venus. Mars. Jupiter. Go with Harry."_

"Lord Potter!" Pluto called over the noise.

"Yeah, Pluto?" Harry turned. He was almost up to one of the guards intent on asking for an escort outside.

"I suggest you _change_. Your opponent will have two forms of magic available to them. Just like you."

"Bloody… fine."

He pulled out a wand and wordlessly splashed his now her hand.

"_Catch!"_ Her Love shouted before tossing the Scepter of Prissiness over.

With grim determination, Harry raised the shiny scepter high above her head, once more releasing Senshi transformation magic in a crowded room.

"Moon Crisis! Make-up!"

The shout caught attention. The resulting magical glowing strip tease caught even more attention. Well, a spinning nude lightshow might possibly be a terrorist threat, right? Better watch closely to make sure it isn't.

"Usa- er, your Highness?" Hermione was about to follow Sailor Moon when the magical girl princess took her hand.

"_We're forming two groups, 'Mione."_ Usagi smiled at the worried witch in an effort to calm her. Oops. Hermione wasn't wearing her jade hoop earrings today. Didn't match the outfit, you see... "Harry and my guardians will be taking the threat head on, but if whoever it is gets around them... Please help me shield our new allies."

Hermione wanted to fight by Harry's side... but she didn't want to defy Usagi here and now to do it. The witch nodded.

Outside the angry anthill of a palace on alert, lines of England's finest were pouring small arms fire into a pool of darkness growing between the palace garden's pond and tennis court.

"…point me Harry Potter…" A raspy giggling voice whispered in the middle of the darkness.

With three Welshmen suffering death by black fire early on, it was safe to say that the intruder was indeed hostile. Hostile… and more fucked up than a football bat; whenever the sounds of gunfire lessened, a deranged giggle could be heard floating in the wind.

Suddenly there was a flash of bright blue from a nearby stand of trees. Three orbs of pure life force crossed the open ground in under a second only to impact a translucent dome of power at the outer edges of the unnatural shadow. Twelve ki-vacuum blades impacted across the rear face of the dome only to break over the surface without penetrating.

In answer, the darkness seemed to boil over until two streams of black fire reached out to incinerate the hidden attackers. Two martial artists leapt from cover to take new positions closer to the palace. Senshi were coming.

"_Hey, Blondie!"_ Ranma yelled over the staccato cracks of gunfire which constantly probed the darkness for a moment of weakness. _"__You comin' out__ to play__?"_

"_That's right."_ Sailor Moon held her first wand in one hand and the Scepter of Prissiness in the other. _"To hell with speeches, girls! Blast it!"_

In a scene that would have given Severus Snape horrible flashbacks were he still alive, five short skirted teenaged girls danced through powerful summonings. There were, however, differences. There was no Silence Wall, for one. The girls weren't fighting a dark potions master, for two.

-pop-

Bellatrix Lestrange reached out with her bare hands and grabbed hold of Venus and Moon. "Crucio!"

Dark lighting rolled over all three figures. The two magical girls not only failed to finish their own attacks (Moon dropping both scepter and wand due to the mind numbing pain) but also lost bodily control as they writhed and screamed under the new and improved unforgivable. Bella laughed...

"Eeeeeee-he-he-he-he-h –_**ack**_-"

… until she couldn't on account of the Chinese battle mace becoming one with her ribcage. The black haired black clad dark avatar bounced roughly off of the ground before landing on her side. Before she could recover, four massive balls of blue ki slammed into her back blowing a cloud of dirt and debris high into the air.

The sounds of gunfire tapered off. At the moment, the Sailor Moon sometimes known as Evil Twin didn't really care as she was too busy recovering from a pain so incredible that Voldemort's torture curse looked like a sexual favor in comparison. On the ground next to her, Venus was half-way between consciousness and unconsciousness. It would later occur to Venus that she's felt that kind of pain once or twice before.

"_Moon. Moon!"_ A hand was pushing on her shoulder. _"Harry, get up!"_

Sailor Moon managed to crack open her eyes only to find herself in the middle of one of Mercury's defensive screens.

"_Wh- who else is hurt?"_ Moon coughed out.

In the background, the voice of Mars could be heard calling to her planet. There was a muffled explosion and the Earth shook beneath them. Several more bursts of gunfire rang out.

"_Just Venus so far. The witch-avatar is nursing a wound, but I'm not sure how bad it is." _ Mercury answered. _"Harry. My mist will fade soon. We need to get moving again."_

She rolled onto her hands and knees and looked around. Venus was moving, but only just. She didn't look to be getting up soon. One blonde magical girl picked up her wand and scepter and staggered over to the other blonde magical girl.

"_Hold on, Ami." _ Moon replied. _"I'm not leaving Minako hurt and helpless out here."_

Sailor Moon braced herself and pointed the Scepter of Prissiness at her fellow Senshi. Then, she dumped all of the love and healing intent she could muster into a spell right at Venus's abdomen. Light flared illuminating the entire mist shrouded battlefield for half a second.

"_Holy hand grenade, Batman!"_ Venus shot up, full of energy. _ "I feel like I just poured sugar into a Coke and mainlined it!"_

"Shite." Moon fell to her knees, her Senshi transformation falling away to leave a female Harry Potter in her dress robes. "I think I overdid it a bit."

Venus and Mercury didn't want to wait any longer. They grabbed the kneeling witch and began to pull her to her feet.

"_Girls... girls!"_ Harry dug deep enough to begin moving under her own power. _"I'm not out of this yet."_

…

While Sailor Harry and the girls were playing tag with Bella outside, Usagi and Pluto were busy indoors trying to convince non-magical officials that leaving without a Senshi guard would be a Bad Idea.

"… at the very least, Saturn must escort the Queen and their Majesties; her defensive shield can stand against forces comparable to nuclear fission reactions." Pluto looked a high ranking career soldier in the eye with utmost confidence. She didn't hold his constant demand to evacuate the Queen against him… if this were a purely non-magical event, then he would be in the right.

"If I may interrupt," Auror Moody approached the pair. "A few notice-me-not's and some simple misdirection spells might be useful..."

POP

"Princess Lady Potter Ma'am!" An excitable house elf shouted from behind the Crown Princess and Pluto.

He was almost shot full of holes.

"Dobby, what is it?" Usagi turned to ask the magical friend/servant of House Potter.

An easily recognizable crystal scepter appeared in the elf's hands. Dobby quickly turned the handle towards Usagi.

"Professor Lord Harry Potter Sir is saying that he be not needing Prissy Stick any longer. Princess Lady Potter Ma'am can be having it back now."

…

Bella was getting tired of having so many muggle weapons bounce off of her. Not that they could breach her Impervious Charm, but their pathetic attempts were simply annoying. Even with a pain relieving charm on her chest, the constant abuse was making it difficult to breath after that purple haired foreigner struck Bella with a mace. The muggle filth was actually slowing her down. She held her wand loosely in hand and called out a single word while sweeping her wand from side to side.

"Imperio!"

The spell worked wonderfully putting dozens of the Queen's Guard at her beck and call.

"Jupiter Oak Evolution!"

Bella apparated out of the way of Jupiter's elemental strike before willing her new slaves to turn their weapons on the girls in short skirts. This time Bella could appreciate the harsh chatter made by her new allies' weapons. She had to grin as two red holes tore through Jupiter's thigh, forcing Mars to grab her and run for cover. Soon her enchanted allies were firing on anything that moved distracting the other soldiers and magicals around her.

"Point me Moon Princess!" Bella shouted, wand twisting in front of her. While a first attempt at using the spell to find Potter seemed to work, her second try met with failure. She decided to try Plan B. A wicked grin came to her face as the magical pointer snapped to attention pointing through a section of wall in front of her. Apparently she wouldn't even have to search other floors!

That grin was short lived as a hand appeared out of thin air and covered Bella's fingers and the wand held by them. It was her turn to scream as Ranma shattered half of the bones in her hand, crushing her wand at the same time.

In a pain fueled fit of rage, Bella called again to the dark fire given her by her Master's ritual. She surrounded herself with black flames hoping to reduce her attacker to ash. Ranma replied by surrounding himself in a corona of pure ki, a shield he could use to stay in grappling range of the psychotic bitch. In his left hand, Ranma began to summon another ball of ki, intent on ramming it down Bella's throat.

Pitty he didn't see Bella pooling energy in her off hand as well.

_BOOOOM!_

The two combatants sailed away from each other in opposite directions, Ranma landing in the garden pond and Bella landing near the palace's west facade.

After getting back off the ground, Bella wasted no time blasting a hole through the wall in the direction her last directional spell indicated the Moon Princess could be found.

…

"Pwinnnnnn-cessssss..." A hoarse female voice called in mockery of childish innocence.

There were pools of blood in the halls, a testament to the brave men who gave their lives for queen and country. There were also the corpses of men who had fallen to the Imperius Curse and killed their own countrymen only to be shot down in return.

"Where aarrrre youuuuuu..."

The palace wards resisted her at first. If she had only been a witch, even if a powerful one, she may have been denied. But she was more than a witch. Through means foul and wretched, her Master had bound her to the energy lying beneath the surface of the Earth. The power of a ley line was more than enough to shatter these wards on contact.

"Bellatrix Lestrange!" A high, youthful voice cried through the smokey haze. "I'm waiting for you!"

Harsh cackling filled the air. The end was near.

A female figure stepped into the meeting hall. Her movements were jerky and her breathing appeared ragged. A knotted dirty mass of hair covered half her face, making the crazed witch's grin and sparkling eyes all the more unnatural. Half of her outfit appeared to be blood soaked and one of her legs was red and sticky, evidence of her most recent victim.

As Bella stopped to take in her Master's enemy, said enemy rose from her seat in the middle of a raised platform. A quick look around the room revealed two more occupants, one to either side of the princess. Sailor Pluto was to Usagi's right, staff in hand, a few paces in front of her sovereign. Sailor Saturn held station a few paces to the rear on Usagi's left, her elaborate pole-arm in a lowered position. The air in front of Saturn was humming with power.

"Ooooooooo..." Bella locked gazes with the Moon Princess. "Looks like some one wants to play wiff Bella."

"You are ill, Bellatrix Lestrange. You are broken. Open your heart to me and I will make you whole again." A jewel encrusted crystal shaft rose to point at Bella's chest.

"Ah-ha!" Bella chortled. "You sound like that old fossil Dumbledore."

"Albus Dumbledore was a great man once and could have become great again given time." As she spoke, Usagi's scepter began to glow. "He gave dark souls a second chance in the hopes that they may repent and turn their hearts from evil. I, on the other hand, aim for the heart first to heal broken souls before their second chance at life begins. When you learn the true power of love, you find no profit in evil."

"We'll see how pretty your words are when you haven't a tongue, little girl."

Bella raised her left hand and released all of the dark energy she had been silently building during their little chat. Black fire immediately bubbled up around her pale skin plunging much of the room around her into darkness. Rising to the challenge, Usagi opened her heart. She poured herself into the task, and in return a pure white nimbus of power countered the black void of Bella's hatred.

Through Bella's mix of both internal and external magics, she managed to push past her attackers outside and locate the Moon Princess with ease. With her rabid fanaticism and crazed creativity, even someone like Ranma could be caught off guard once, and that was all Bella needed. Granted, if she had paid more attention to the other Death Eaters when they reported to her Master, she may have sussed out her primary target earlier, but nobody's perfect, right? More to the point, as an avatar, she was still in her infancy and there was no way in Hell she was going to put down the Crown Princess of Magical Girls in a straight up contest of power.

The room went from half darkness and half blinding light to pure blinding light in less than ten seconds.

When the light faded, Usagi was revealed to be in the same position as she started with both Saturn and Pluto in their original guard positions was well.

Bellatrix was also in the same spot for the most part. Only, she was down on one knee, picking something off of the floor. She was also healed of all wounds taken outside and on the way through the palace hallways. When her hands came up, the held a jeweled choker with a broken clasp. With shaking hands, Bella tried to get the choker to re-attach, but it fell slack and caught on the top fringe of her dress.

Neither Usagi nor Bellatrix paid any attention to the green haired Senshi stepping forward.

"Tom Riddle's dark influence is gone, Bellatrix. You are free. You don't need him anymore." Usagi called in soothing tones.

A very unladylike snort escaped Bella's mouth. The snort seemed to be a signal, as wet tear tracks began to fall from the witch's eyes.

"You're wrong." She hissed. In a fit of frustration, Bellatrix put her right palm against her forehead, moving a mass of hair aside to do so.

Usagi's eyes widened in recognition of the down-turned black moon sigil in plain view. She'd never forget the sigil of an enemy that followed her daughter back through time in an effort to destroy Usagi's future kingdom.

Bella wasn't done yet though. "What makes you think that I didn't really love hi-"

But then she was gone. Pluto began to lower the butt end of her staff from what had been the small of Bella's back when she was still there.

Usagi opened her mouth. _"Did you-"_ Pluto nodded immediately. _"She was..."_ Another nod. Banished.

"_You know as well as I that the time line must be maintained, Your Highness." _ Pluto called with sympathy in her voice.

Usagi nodded weakly, though anyone watching could see her face gain color and the shine of future tears appear in her eyes.

There were watchers. Harry rushed from her place at the meeting hall's open doorway to pull his Love into a tight embrace. As Usagi shuddered in her man's (currently woman's) arms, Mars and Venus carried Jupiter into the room with Mercury following them in. Saturn dropped her Silence Wall and jogged over to Jupiter's side to administer magical healing. Immediately behind Saturn's last position, a veritable wall of disillusionment spells and notice-me-not charms fell to reveal all of the senior members of the pre-attack conference including Queen Elizabeth, Emperor Akihito and Empress Michiko. Minister Greengrass immediately assured the Queen that her palace's wards would be upgraded until it was an impregnable magical fortress as soon as possible and that a larger detail of aurors would be kept on hand until the work was complete. Monsieur Delacour promised to rally I.C.W. support against a terrorist organization that he found far too powerful and far too willing to strike muggle targets. If Minister Greengrass and the Queen were amenable to the idea, he'd have a company of French aurors sent across the Channel that same evening.

And so the first international trans-magical conference came to a close early due violence, bloodshed and death. There were promises to study the issues brought up by delegates and promises to meet again. Plans were devised on how to deal with the very public nature of Bella's assault. If they were lucky, the locals, paparazzi and BBC won't have picked up on the rather exotic nature of the combat and a more reasonable sounding terrorist organization can be blamed for a bloody assault on the palace the very day of an international visit by the Imperial Family of Japan.

More unofficial wedding invitations were extended, of course. It was also quite likely that medals or some other such honors would be bestowed upon certain people for certain deeds that for now must remain out of public scrutiny.

Hermione had to make due with the fact that, although she didn't get to make her speech in front of the full assembly like Harry and Usagi did, she would be given that chance at some point in the future. On the plus side, Prince William did seek out everyone's favorite Gryffindor Head of House before she left the palace. William made sure she knew he was quite relieved to see her unharmed after all the excitement.

She had no idea what to make of her situation there. William was no Harry, but he wasn't at all bad... in fact he was quite nice by her way of thinking, if a bit young still. Maybe Usagi could give her some advice.

Back in Hogwarts Castle, Lavender Brown's gossip senses were tingling. She immediately grabbed her tarot deck and went to find Parvati. There was work to be done.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes: ** The spell that Voldie and Rookwood were chanting was lifted from Willow.

**Omake:**

**Amazon Women on the Moon **

"_Dammit Meatball Head!"_ Mars huffed. _"What made you think we would 'find something cool' for Harry way up here?"_

Sailor Moon spun around in place. There was lots of stuff around, but nothing seemed to scream 'Christmas present' yet.

"_Mecury!"_ Moon shouted. _"Find anything?"_

The bluette rose from a crouch, idly rubbing the dust off of a darker than usual rock.

"_Is Harry in to geology? Is he interested the Apollo missions?"_

Moon shook her head to both questions.

"_Sorry."_ Mercury pocketed the rock she was holding even if it wouldn't become a present. How many teenaged girls have a moon rock?

"_Jupter! What's over there?" _Usagi turned to ask the leggy brunette.

"_Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee..." _

Moon sweat dropped. They weren't here to take advantage of low gravity and jump around like little... well, that did sound kinda fun... no! She had a job to do.

"_Venus! Find anything?"_ Usagi tried again with the blonde Senshi walking past her. Maybe they should try moving to another area.

Venus opened her mouth. _ "Brrrraaaaap!"_

"_Ewwww!" _ Moon complained. _ "That smelled nasty! What did you eat for lunch?"_

Venus pinked and put one hand behind her head. _ "Peanut butter, bannana and bacon sandwiches."_

"_That sounds gross." _ Moon called.

"_Then don't go inside the Nazi moon base." _ Venus retorted. _ "It's the only thing left in there."_

"_The what?" "The where?"_

"_The Nazi moon base."_ Venus pointed over her left shoulder.

All of the other Senshi turned their heads.

Grey concrete. Check.

Straight lines and hard angles. Check.

Machine gun ports. Check.

Black swastika on a white circle in a red field. Check.

"_When the fuck did that get here?"_ Moon was having a fit. Nazis? On _her_ moon? It's more likely than you'd think.

Mercury raised her hand. _"I'm guessing the late thirties or early forties."_

"_Well they can just come back up here and take it home with them!"_ Moon kicked at a rock in front of her. It didn't move. _"OWIE! Stupid Nazi moon base!"_

**End Omake**

**Other Omake:**

**Adult Swim**

Usagi thought over the question for a moment before answering. "When a boy takes a girl out for a huge dinner but he doesn't let her use the restroom. Then he has BEEP BEEP with her and she BEEEP all over his BEEEP. So right when he's about to BEEEP he takes it out and blows BEEEP-BEEEP on her back. That's the rusty part. The venture part is where he eats that BEEEP off her back without using his hands. ... and that is a Rusty Venture."

The other girls in the Gryffindor Common Room slumber party were in shock.

"Sorry, I'm afraid not." Hermione called from her spot on the nearest love seat. "A Rusty Venture is when a boy BEEEP BEEP so much his BEEEP gets all red and sore. Though to be fair I've heard some people say it's when two males BEEEEP and fill each other's BEEEP with BEEEP. Then one turns over and they BEEEP BEEEEP into each other's BEEEP. That's actually a Snake Venom, though."

Romilda Vane stumbled over to the fireplace and threw up on the hearth.

**End Omake**

(Second Omake edited under protest. My wife loved it the original way, you sissies.)


	17. The Last Lap

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Seventeen****: The Last Lap**

March 2nd,1997

It was a quiet morning. There were no chirps, clicks or croaks, not with the snow still on the ground. Still, it was a lovely morning. Only a few small tufts of frozen vapor marred the blue sky and the sun was taking full advantage to make late winter's snow cover shine brilliantly.

A pair of boots marched their way through the snow disturbing the silence each time one came down in the open field. After two minutes of the same soft crunching, one step failed to make the same amount of noise as the others. Why? Because it came down not in ankle deep snow but in bright green grass.

"Now that's what I call a fine pair of melons!" The man wearing boots exclaimed as he surveyed his vegetable garden.

Indeed, his melons were fully ripe and begging to be tasted, as were his long hard gourds, hot peppers and succulent cabbages. The wizard pulled a wand out of his sleeve and, after checking on the heating and preservation charms surrounding the small patch of greenery, set about the task of selecting the day's vegetable, fruit and herb menu.

The rest of his trip outdoors was just as peaceful. He filled a basket full of healthy goodness and set about returning merrily back home. Only ten paces out from the back door of his family cottage, the rear window was pushed open and a little head framed in black curls popped out.

"Daddy! Daddy! My Hogwarts letter came today!" The girl yelled in joy.

"How delightful!" Her father returned. "I'm sure your moth-"

Daddy didn't get to finish his sentence as he was roughly pushed aside by an unseen force. Sickly green light filled her vision as it passed through the space her daddy had been standing just a moment ago.

"Death Eaters!" A disembodied voice cried. "Inside NOW!"

The eleven year old (just today!) girl squeaked and pulled the window shut behind her. Just as her father was scrambling up to run the last few paces to the door, said door was wrenched open by the girl.

"Daddy!"

A muffled shout and a red light came from the wizard's left. Only hours of 'play' with his wife and daughter over the past few months saved him as reflexes kicked in. Thank Merlin and Harry Potter for those Prophet articles on personal safety.

His wand was out in a flash, the nearby snow forming an ice wall. The following explosion pushed him and his daughter through the door as flying ice blew past in a storm of rocks and slush.

SLAM

"What's going on?" A desperate witch yelled as she spelled the door shut behind her daughter and husband.

Purple light flashed through the rear window as a loud boom shook the whole cottage.

"Death Eaters!"

Without missing a beat, the husband grabbed a fist full of floo powder and tossed it into his fireplace.

"Ministry of Magic Atrium!" He called, intent on finding an escape path for his family.

Unfortunately, as soon as the flames turned green, their front door exploded inward.

"Stop right there, you filthy blood traitor!" A cloaked figure called through a cloud of wood dust. "One more move and your daughter _–squick-"_

Not that 'squick' is a word, strictly speaking, but it was the noise the Death Eater made as the pointy half of a Chinese broadsword poked out of his neck from behind. The bright blood covered blade was turned ninety degrees before sliding out the way it came. With a shudder, the masked killer dropped to the ground in a pool of his own blood.

"Sorry 'bout that…" A buxom and blood spattered woman called from the now cleared doorway. "…he not supposed to get this far. I just kill them faster next time."

The family of three watched in horrified fascination as the young woman flipped backwards, her long purple hair whipping around yet never seeming to trip her up. Her flip brought her past the green light of a killing curse with amazing grace and skill. She came to a stop over a dozen paces from the Death Eater responsible for that killing curse. He tried again and failed. Trembling hands were placed over the girl's eyes as her parents watched the young woman dance between spells, clearly taunting her attacker. After several more dark curses missed the mark, the angry wizard tried to apparate behind her for a surprise attack. At his twisting motions and audible _-pop-_ Shampoo only smiled and blurred behind him. Her 'apparation' was far quicker than his and far less noisy to boot; only a few few gouges in the snowy earth at their feet betrayed the effort she put into her maneuver. The dark wizard seemed shocked and confused. How could this wandless woman match him trick for trick? Wasn't he part of the elite? The powerful? Wasn't he destined to rule over a stable of comely servant girls, two of which were to be picked up this very day? Her right hand shot forward and closed around his hand and the wand it held. Her left hand circled the back of his cloak covered neck and twisted. Hard.

**-snap-**

"_Have fun writhing in Hell, wizard!" _She shouted in a language neither the dead dark wizard nor the living family could have understood before letting go of his body and watching it fall to the ground.

"I'm terribly sorry you had to see that." A soft, consoling voice came from behind three terrified Britons.

Both parents turned around in a panic, wands drawn.

"Please. I mean you no harm." A beautiful woman with thigh length green hair, red eyes and a short skirt stood at their rear stoop, both hands empty and open. "My friend and I were just passing through when we noticed your predicament."

"Sailor… P-Pluto?" The mother asked. Pluto nodded. "Thank you. I- I don't know how we could have gotten out of that alive."

"I'm sure you would have." Pluto added. She wasn't lying per say... the mother and daughter would not have died. They would have been taken as playthings and breeding stock. The father would have died right off, though.

"Pluto!" The Senshi's ally called from the front door. _"Can I have their masks?"_

Pluto turned to see the purple tressed amazon staring covetously at the masked corpse at her feet. _"Of course, Shampoo. No one will miss them and I'm sure that they would look good hanging on your great-grandmother's trophy wall back home."_

Shampoo smiled and began to sing as she eagerly snatched an ivory faceplate from the ex-Death Eater before her.

"_Please leave their wands and other effects behind. The aurors will need at least that much evidence when they arrive." _ Pluto turned back to her magical hosts. "I see you lit your floo. Good. Please go to the Ministry and report this to the first auror you see."

As wizard and witch nodded in acceptance, Pluto looked again to her traveling companion.

"_Let's go collect your trophies, Shampoo. We have a date at the Clearwater home in six and a half minutes."_

Pluto gave a final bow to her English hosts before following Shampoo outside. The three magicals who very nearly became Death Eater victims today nervously looked at each other before retreating to the relative safety of the Ministry of Magic. They would never admit to it out loud, but all three thought that hearing a muggle woman sing traditional Chinese amazon victory songs as she took loot from dead wizards was creepy.

* * *

March 8th, 1997

_LET'S GO GRYFFINDOR, LET'S GO_ **-stomp stomp-** _LET'S GO __**-stomp stomp**_**-**

"And that's Smith of Hufflepuff with the quaffle." Said a dreamy voice, echoing over the grounds. (1) "He did the commentary last time, of course and he chose to use his authority to make advances upon my person. I should like to state for the record that my answer was in fact 'no'."

There was a great swell of laughter and giggling in the stands. As Luna's voice continued to drift over the school's Quidditch stadium, Zacharias Smith took the quaffle down the middle of the field before making an attempt at the center hoop. Unfortunately for Smith, Ron's been at the top of his game since his birthday last Saturday. There are rumors about what Lav-Lav gave to/did for her boyfriend on his birthday... all unconfirmed... but whatever it was, the young man has been high on life and razor sharp ever since.

"Oh look! Ginny has the quaffle now. I do like her, she's very nice... and there she goes up the pitch like an angry nargle. Bibble- no, Buggins- well, whatever his name is got in Ginny's way, but she's already rid of the quaffle and Demelza earns the lions another ten points. Oh, and the Headmistress has just informed me that Bibble-Buggins's name is Cadwallader. Cadwallader Bibble-Buggins... that sounds like something I should be searching for..."

There was a swell of support from the Hufflepuff stands as Cadwallader blew Luna a kiss.

"And the Headmistress has now informed me that I didn't mean it that way. Now, why wouldn't I mean what I say?"

Crowd noise rose again as Luna ignored the game she was supposed to be covering in favor of listening to the Scotswoman behind her. The game continued unabated even though the announcer and her Headmistress were now in a discussion that had nothing to do with quidditch. Points were even scored without comment.

"I'm sorry we couldn't keep the team together for your first match in uniform, your Highness." Lavender said down in the lower stands around the pitch. "Luna should be here with us."

Lav-Lav had one foot in Parvati's raised hands and her other foot was in the hand behind her head... thus turning her body into a circle above one leg. Usagi and Venus called this one the 'scorpion' during their last practice session.

Usagi tried to look upset but failed and had to settle for sticking her tongue out at her squad captain. Usagi was performing the same move as Lavender while being held aloft by Romilda Vane. Two more Gryffindor cheerleaders were in the same position on Lav-Lav's other side, and between the six girls the idea was to make a set of quidditch hoops out of witches.

In order to get the cheerleaders closer to the action, a two meter deep balcony/track had been added at the lowest stand level of stadium seating along either side of the oblong field. It's something of an experiment in quidditch architecture to make the cheerleading easier to see for all. Cheerleaders could move in front of any section of stands and thus be easier to spot without having to look down onto the pitch. These balconies also had the added benefit of seasonal heating charms so that the cheerleaders didn't have to constantly burn through their magical reserves wand in hand just to keep warm all day long.

"What's bad for us is good for Hogwarts. See how much fun Susan's having?"

_SWOOP THEM, BLUDGER THEM, MAKE THEM RELINQUISH THE QUAFFLE_

Across the pitch, Hufflepuff squad captain Susan Bones was having a grand time. True, the puffs spent so much time organizing recently that they didn't have any moves aside from what the original Gryffindor squad had last game, but Hufflepuff House was not about to go through the rest of the season without their own cheerleaders. The idea of cheerleading was embraced so thoroughly by the teamwork loving Hufflepuffs that nearly every witch in the house applied for a spot on the squad. Ten puff wizards tried out too. Three wizards made the squad. They even created a Junior Varsity Squad full of First through Third Years. Even the lions don't have a JV squad yet. Ravenclaw and Slytherin were still behind the curve though. Myrtle, Luna and Padma were trying their best to organize a squad, but too many claws seemed married to the library or couldn't be bothered to do something so extroverted. Slytherin house was worse off. Close as they were to Harry, the Greengrass girls were not athletic and refused to have any part in the endeavor. Usagi's been trying to tease a squad together whenever she takes a meal in the Great Hall, but so far only the younger year witches seem interested. Perhaps a JV squad could be formed, but even that was iffy.

"What's that, Pofessor Flitwick?" Luna's voice drifted over the crowd. "Oh... it seems the snitch has come out to play."

A great upswell of noise bubbled through the student population of Hogwarts as they cheered on a seeker's duel in the sky above. Not that it was much of a duel, really; Harry was clearly much closer to the snitch than his Hufflepuff counterpart. Suddenly the snitch reversed course at about mid-pitch and flew a straight into the Hufflepuff cheerleader line. Witches scattered as the snitch cut a zig-zag pattern between them into the stands.

"I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I don't like the looks of this..." Luna commented as both seekers dove in amongst the witches as they screamed and ran about. Things quickly calmed down after two broomriders moved back into the air. "Oh, Harry's going back up again... I think the snitch got away… Yes, it would seem that the boys won't follow the snitch between the legs of random Hufflepuff witches and it's disappeared again."

Two red faced seekers sought to re-position themselves as the red faced Powerpuffs (by majority vote) reassembled below. Sitting next to her Headmistress, the youngest Head of House in centuries stopped watching and turned back to her study materials.

"Professor Granger… Professor Granger?"

Hermione looked up from a heavy tome. Headmistress McGonagall was watching her and not the game.

"Yes, Headmistress?"

"Are you actually doing research _now_? In the middle of a match?"

Hermione looked like she'd been caught copying someone else's work. "I do check to see what Harry's doing once every two or three minutes…"

Minerva snorted (in a very ladylike way of course). "Surely you can relax for an hour or two, lass. Even I don't bring parchments to a quidditch match- even Albus never brought work to a game and he was the Chief Warlock and Supreme Mugwump as well as Headmaster."

Hermione's eyes shifted between her book and her superior a few times. She looked a bit unkempt, as if she didn't have time to put herself together that morning.

"With my teaching duties and my Head of House duties… and planning out D.A. meetings and going to see Juliet once a week… there just isn't any time available for me to advance my own studies. Is there any way that a time turner could be made available, Headmistress?"

The older woman shook her head. "I'm afraid those devices are now even more heavily restricted than they were during your third school year, my dear. I am told that your unfortunate trip to the Department of Mysteries was used as an excuse to do some serious house cleaning down there, not that anyone blames you or Professor Potter for that."

"Yes, well…" Hermione tried not to feel guilty for the loss of so many time turners. "Harry and I have been incorporating N.E.W.T. level classwork from other subjects- you know: seeing how one can use those other spells and principles for defense- where ever possible. Even so, I can't help but think that Harry and I are slipping behind where we should be."

"Hermione." McGonagall said softly, or as softly as she dared with Ginny leading a charge on the Hufflepuff keeper and the whole school population yelling at the top of their lungs. "You are doing so much outside of what is normally asked of our students. In fact, some students consider even one N.E.W.T. a worthy goal for graduation. It fills me with pride to see all of you so dedicated to learning… even Mister Weasley is still attending the defense classes! You have already performed above and beyond all of my expectations for this most difficult of years, dear. You can have as much time as you want to prepare for your next exams… whether that be at the end of the school year or during the summer or sometime next year."

Hermione looked down. She didn't want to be caught crying in public like this even if they were happy tears. She never saw Professor McGonagall crying while on duty as Head of House.

"I've been looking over your lesson plans of course… and discussing you and Harry with the other professors. Quite advanced work, really. I can't be sure, but the two of you may actually be _ahead_ of your peers in some classes."

Hermione's head snapped up in spite of the tears. "Really?"

Her Headmistress nodded firmly. "Quite so. I realize that you and Harry haven't attended normal classes since the… the incident… but I think both of you should still take the standard end of year tests. Not for official records, mind, but so that we can see where you are and tailor classes and tutors to suit your needs."

"Oh, thank you Headmistress! Thank you ever so much!"

Minerva placed a hand on Hermione's arm.

"One last thing, Professor Granger."

Hermione's back straightened in her seat.

"Yes Headmistress?"

Minerva reached a little further over and closed the book on Hermione's lap.

"New rule, dear. I'm afraid that from now on it is forbidden for teenaged Heads of House to read whilst attending school sanctioned quidditch matches."

"But… but…"

Hermione was about to unleash her best puppy dog eyes and pouty lips when she and Minerva were both distracted by Luna's voice rising over the crowd.

"… and it seems that Harry Potter is after the snitch again. Yes, he's following a shiny speck up and away from the stands… your bottom is safe for now, Usagi… and now he's dodging back and forth a bit as the snitch tries to throw him off. Harry will need to grab it in the next few seconds if he wants to get it before- and he's got it! Harry Potter has the snitch! Hufflepuff House put up a good fight, but the lions of Gryffindor come away with a 260 to 90 victory in the end."

Luna's declaration caused the crowd to go wild.

As two house teams began to come down from the air, students and staff began to leave their seats. While most left the pitch to spend time lazing about school grounds or to get some revising in... or to get some broom closet snogging time in... some Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs chose to greet their players on the grassy pitch. Today, there were a few visitors in the stands who also had to come down and congratulate the winning captain.

"_Daddy!"_ A pink haired little monster came out from under a suspiciously familiar invisibility cloak, jumped Harry Potter and squeezed him for all she was worth.

"Cuteness! What are you doing here?"

Harry was caught flat footed, but snitch in hand. As he returned the pink haired princess's hugs, Harry looked over his shoulder at the pair of Senshi trotting out ahead of the crowds. Neptune and Uranus both looked a little upset that their charge had somehow gotten ahead of them.

"_I came here to see you of course, silly."_ Cuteness pulled back and gave her daddy her best pouty face. _"You're happy to see me, right?"_

The nine century old girl backed up far enough to let Harry see the broom at her feet. Ah. That's how she gave her minders the slip. Harry tried to look stern, but with the snitch in his hand and another victory on his record, Harry was finding it hard to frown.

"_Of course I am, kitten. I just don't don't think Michiru and Haruka are going to like you flying away from them."_

The littlest Senshi turned around to see that her escorts did indeed seem a bit grumpy as they approached. She quickly picked her broom off the ground and began stuffing it into her enchanted shoulder bag, weary of having her stuff taken away by grouchy grown-ups.

"Why look at you! I didn't know they came so little!" Katie Bell squealed as she walked up to her captain and the pink munchkin next to him. Ginny and Demelza Robins were right behind her. "I'm Katie. What's your name?"

"Cuteness!" She was all smiles now. The two Older Senshi wouldn't be able to get a good scolding in with all of the witches and wizards now flooding the pitch.

"_Chibi-usa!"_ Usagi yelled at the front of a line of witches dressed in red and gold, Mercury by her side.

"_Hi, Meatball Head!"_ Cuteness returned, narrowly avoiding calling Usagi 'Momma' out in the open. Then she had an idea. Cuteness pulled closer to Harry and began teasing her teenaged mother. _"I've got you're ma - an. Nya-nya-nya-nya-nyaaa-nyaaa!"_

"_Hey!" _ Usagi growled. The gathering on the field was growing quickly with more and more students getting between her and her Harry. _"Shut it spore. To the victor go the spoils and right now my middle name is Spoils."_

"_Ron's on the winning team too, Meatball Head. Maybe yo__u could kiss on him some!" _With that, Cuteness gave her momma a raspberry and started making faces at her.

The irate silver haired girl surged through the crowd just seconds after the pink haired time traveler let go of her daddy and made a run for it. The chase was on. Harry was surprised, having never seen the two go at it like this before. Right before he turned to try and break things up, a gloved hand fell on his shoulder. Mercury.

"Don't worry, Harry. Before Usagi had her 'accident' she and Chibi-usa would do this pretty much every single day. It's actually nice to see them play around like they used to." Mercury spoke in soft even tones, completely at ease with things as they were. She was still as attentive as a guard should be but it wasn't her job to keep the two moon rabbits from annoying the hell out of each other. Then she saw the snitch still trying to break free of Harry's grip. "May I?"

Harry saw what had Mercury's attention and handed the little gold winged ball over. Mercury gave a small nod of appreciation and started scanning the ball with her computer, trying to figure out how it worked. Usagi could keep out of trouble for a few minutes right? Besides, Mercury wasn't the only Senshi on the field right now and her background scans were still running...

* * *

"Wow!" Cuteness shouted, spitting bits of cottage pie out over the table. "Dobby, this is great! You guys are awesome cooks!"

Around her and the other private dining guests, hundreds of house elves thanked the young Senshi for her kind words. The Great Hall was getting a little too crowded and noisy to have a decent conversation, so Harry had asked for a table in the kitchen. Cuteness felt like she really was in a fairy tale as she watched the elves run about cooking and cleaning with magic. Hell, with hundreds of short, long eared, tea cosy wearing elves using magic to cook and clean, even Mercury felt like she was going full-on Disney today. As usual, Dobby replied first and loudest.

"I is being so happy! The little Miss Potter is as wonderful and kind as Lord and Lady Potter! Dobby works for the best family in the world!"

As the excitable elf collapsed in gratitude while hugging Cuteness's leg, certain guests at the table went quiet. Until just then, not everyone here was 'in the know'. Sure, Hermione and Ginny knew as did the Potters and the three non-Potter Senshi who were hanging out after the match.

Lavender, Ron and Neville on the other hand...

Lav-Lav's eyes widened past house elf size rather quickly. "Just wait a minute! 'Little Miss Potter'? Dobby said the same thing once back when we all went to that house of yours now that I think about it but I really didn't think anything of it before. Is there something you need to tell us, Harry?"

Down on the floor, a house elf suddenly began to shake. "Eeek! I'm so sorry Harry Potter Sir I can feed them forgetfulness potions if you need me to Harry Potter Sir oh what have I done what have I done-"

"Dobby." Harry called, somewhat uncomfortable with Lav-Lav's gaze and needing a moment to hash things out properly.

"Ooohhhhh Dobby is a bad elf! Dobby should be punished just like the bad masters punished him! Dobby will iron out the wrinkles in his ears!"

"No Dobby!" Harry barked. "There will be **no** punishing yourself for this. Now that I think about it, I'm sure never told you to keep this bit secret. You never really had to before."

"Y- yes Sir, P- Professor Lord Harry Potter Sir."

When Dobby looked up from the floor again, he noticed the little Miss Potter in question had her arms open in his direction. She also had her best puppy dog eyes shining their shiniest. Dobby hoped right into the offered hug and started whimpering.

Lavender's extra wide eyes took in everyone else's reactions.

"You knew about this?" Lavender asked Ginny. The redheaded witch was far too calm... and so was- "Hermione? Is this another one of those adventures that the Golden Trio get into that the rest of us don't hear about until later?"

A look at her own confused boyfriend gave Lavender the answer to that one. "Wait, wait wait... when the bloody hell did this happen? I mean, I know I'm a blonde and all but I can count past ten without taking my shoes off and the ages just don't add up."

Harry looked around the school kitchen. Every teen was looking between him and Usagi and the house elf staff was trying very hard to not be caught listening to the Great Harry Potter Sir.

"Look, I'll not be asking for any magical vows or anything but this is a secret. A big one."

Ron nodded cautiously, using much of his recent gains in emotional depth to not feel cheated out of this secret when 'Mione and Ginny obviously knew earlier. Nev and Lavender both nodded quickly; they were both eager to make another step into the Awesome Lord Potter's Inner Circle of Coolness. Lav-Lav's words, not Nev's.

"Right. To begin with, all of my Japanese acquaintances know this one as it relates closely with the whole history of the Senshi. Luna knows too, not that I said anything to her but that's Luna for you." Harry quickly glanced to the elf staff and back. He thought he knew where elf loyalty lay... and the Dark Lord's spies were cleaned out of Hogwarts back in December or before, right? "Yes, Cuteness is my daughter."

Ron's eyes were as big as saucers now. Not to be outdone, Lav-Lav took to staring _and_ gaping like a fish. Neville was clearly surprised but still held some decorum due to years of his Gran's harsh instruction.

"We didn't have her out of wedlock, either." Usagi added in support. "In fact, we haven't had her yet."

"Oh my-" Lavender covered her own mouth and her eyes grew so wide that Harry began to wonder if she had some metamorph talents.

"She's from the future." Harry added.

Ron went from being really shocked to being really excited. "Check and mate! Absolutely brilliant, this is! Outstanding!"

Lav-Lav turned to him, visibly confused. She wasn't the only one even if two hyper-intelligent young women in the room knew what he was on about already.

"Don't you see? Harry wouldn't go around making babies with the Dark Tosser running about putting the little tykes in danger, would he? This is great! The mere fact that we've met Harry's daughter from the future means that Voldemort snuffs it and we win!"

That got Lav-Lav and Nev smiling. They could both see it now. Harry would never risk a pregnant wife or an infant, would he?

Pity their confidence was a touch misplaced. Harry's own parents faced a similar situation, though to be fair Voldemort hadn't singled them out until that bun was already in the oven. There was also the issue of Pluto and Jusenkyo's interference with space-time. Now _that_ was totally super 'need to know only' secret. If that had been let out tonight, Harry would have chased everyone down with Obliviations whether he knew how to cast the charm or not. Luckily, it wasn't quite that bad.

"So- er, Cuteness?" Lavender asked the pink haired witch-Senshi. She nodded. "Ol' Tom Riddle already lost the war as far as you're concerned, right?"

Cuteness looked to her parents for approval before hesitantly nodding again.

"YES!" Ron cheered, jumping out of his seat. "When? How do we get him?"

"Ron!" Hermione shouted from the next chair over. "Time travel is serious stuff! If she were allowed to tell I'm sure she would have already said something."

"That's right, Hermione." Mercury interrupted. "Hosting our young Moon Princess is both an honor and a great risk. We must always be alert for the possibility of a paradox. Quantum mechanics dictates that by observing something you change it, even if you don't know what you change or how. If you think you can use time travel to exert any conscious control over history or even control the changes you make to history, think again; the odds of something going horribly wrong are very high compared to the odds of changing history in any positive way."

Harry and Hermione both tried very hard to not look guilty. Luckily, all attention was on the blue themed Senshi. Mercury was careful to leave Pluto and her duties out of the argument. The Guardian of the Space-Time Gate is an exception to the rule and a highly secret exception at that.

"Then... then why is she here now in the first place?" Neville asked.

Good question actually. But of course Mercury had a counter to it already.

"Traveling into your past or mine may be terribly dangerous because we... well it's an assumption about you but I think it's safe for the sake of my argument... because we have no evidence of us having been in the past already. For Chibi-usa, it's a recorded fact in her own time period that she most certainly _did_ travel to their past. Everyone already knew she'd done it. By that reasoning, she _had_ to travel to the past; staying in her original time was a guaranteed paradox generator to be avoided at all costs."

"I... I think I understood that." Ron mused. "Reminds me of a game of chess what with all of the thinking ahead and the possible gains and risks. One move, no matter how innocent it seems at the time, can spell victory or defeat ten or fifteen moves later."

Lavender leaned over, mouth next to her wizard's ear and discretely asked, "You'll help me sort it out later, right? Maybe I am a bit too blonde to get all that."

"That is a good initial explanation even if the time travel issue is infinitely more complicated than a game of chess." Mercury replied to Ron's comment.

"Oh damn." Lavender grumbled. "This is going to be really hard to keep from Parvati."

Several hard glares made her feel the need to clarify quickly.

"Not that I would spill, honestly!" The Gryffindor blonde held her hands open before her. "It's just that she's seen Harry and Cuteness get all lovey dovey and playful a already. She even said something about it to me just before we all broke off to eat here in the kitchens. Between her and her sister, your secret may be found out or at least suspected before too long."

Ron piped up. "They'll not get it right the first time, mind you. Any rumors that get kicked around the halls aren't likely to cast Harry in a good light. I mean, look at what they've said about him before."

"You're right, Ron." Hermione said before turning to her best friend. "You might actually want to use the Luna defense this time Harry. It could be the best option before rumors do start up."

"The _what_ defense?" Lavender asked.

Harry answered. "The Luna defense. She once offered to tell one of my secrets aloud in the middle of the Great Hall for me, claiming that such a proclamation would prevent most students from believing the secret could be true no matter what proof was put before them them."

Lavender covered her mouth with her hand but still couldn't keep the snort in.

"You have to admit. She has a special relationship with the world around us that makes her very... misunderstood." Harry mused.

Harry thought about the girl and smiled. If she hadn't been pulled away from the quidditch pitch by Myrtle and the Creevey brothers for something or other, she would have been invited to the kitchens too. Actually, all four of them could have been here were they not having so much fun on their own. Maybe he could pull those four down into the kitchens for a 'family' meal soon too.

* * *

Moods in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were on the rise. True, spring had not yet sprung and would not for another month yet but there were fewer ground shattering events to deal with in school and fewer articles about violence and death in the daily paper. The colorful Senshi which dutifully followed their Crown Princess every where she went still received stares, but it was more for the drool factor than the 'Holy shit! Foreign magical girls!' factor. Some school residents might even think that their life had finally stabilized, that they had achieved normalcy in this world of wands and ghosts and moving staircases.

Stability. Like that word could ever apply to anyone in Hogwarts. Stability would come the day Luna Lovegood said something that made sense.

Daughters from the future. Honestly. What will she think of next?

"'Mione." Harry called from his seat in the Great Hall as the school ate breakfast around him. "'Mione? What's that?"

The curly brown haired witch did look up, but not until after she finished the sentence she was on.

"It's a message from Setsuna." She replied. Harry's confused look was all Hermione needed to continue. "Venus gave it to me when she relieved Mars half an hour ago. She wants me to do her a favor."

"Really?" Harry couldn't think of anything the Senshi of Time might need Hermione for, but it's not like he's ever been able to predict the green haired woman's actions before. "What kind of favor- er, if you don't mind my asking, that is."

At this, Hermione picked up a second letter, one that she hadn't opened yet. It was a muggle envelope just like Setsuna's but smaller. Her name was written in fine calligraphy on the front face.

"She wants me to say yes to this." Hermione didn't wait for Harry to ask another question. She cracked open the seal.

Harry watched as Hermione read over the text. Soon her eyes widened and she closed the letter for a moment before re-opening and re-reading the message.

"Umn... 'Mione?" Harry was beginning to get worried. His best friend was showing signs of an approaching mental meltdown of the 'I'm not good enough to prepare my student's for their N.E.W.T.s' variety.

"But, but why would Pluto get involved in this?" She squeaked before dropping her letter to the table.

Harry picked the offending piece of paper and began to read it himself.

"This is... is this how royals ask someone on a date? Do you even know how to ride a horse?"

"Of course I know how to ride a horse!" Hermione snapped. "First rode side saddle when I was seven... but that's not the point."

"The point is Prince William is asking you on a date." Harry's comment was the attracting attention of other students. "A second date at that."

Red faced, Hermione snatched the Royal invitation back out of Harry's hands. Harry couldn't be sure, but he thought he heard Parvati mutter the phrase 'Witch Weekly absolutely must know about this' from two seats away.

"The point is..." Hermione shot back, "...that Sailor Pluto is asking me to accept."

"Can you honestly tell me that you considered refusing?"

Hermione's face immediately switched from panic-y anger to insecurity. Harry switched tactics and pulled Hermione in for a hug. His next words were warm and soft and delivered for her alone to hear.

"You won't lose me, 'Mione. You won't. If you get closer to another bloke or if you don't... it won't change us." Harry kissed her cheek. "Though I will insist on having a chat with whoever the bloke is... royal or not I'll not let some unworthy ponce get his hands on you."

Hermione laughed into his shoulder and pulled back enough so that they could look each other in the eyes. Harry continued, switching from the personal angle to the political one.

"So Setsuna wants you to say yes. You don't_ have_ to agree to it. Of course... with her, it may not have anything to do with romance."

"You're right." Hermione was taking control back from her emotions. "She could very well be playing a political game... but why me? Why a date with William?"

"Setsuna works in mysterious ways." Harry smiled a bit. "I try not to think about her too often. I've gotten nightmares by breaking that rule before."

"You mean wet dreams and sticky sheets don't you?" Hermione returned quickly.

"Those too." Harry wouldn't deny that. The sky was blue. The sun was big. Setsuna was magical alien super-Veela hot. Fundamental truths, every one of them.

"So!" Ginny interrupted from the other side of the table very, very close to Nev. No doubt they were touching thighs below the table _and_ one of Ginny's hands was unaccounted for. And Nev's face was Weasley red. "Are you going to say yes or not?"

"The public has a right to know!" Lavender shouted from two seats down. "You two did make a well matched couple at the Valentine's Ball."

"Not that it's any of your business, but I think... I think I will accept." Hermione replied.

"Excellent."

Harry and Hermione both jumped in shock.

"Merlin, Pluto!" Harry called after catching his breath. "How did you sneak up on us like that?"

They hadn't even seen anyone look at her before she spoke either. Even now the other male Gryffindors have trouble hiding their drool when a Senshi approaches the table.

"Headmistress McGonagall was kind enough to revise the Castle wards just as Kreacher keyed me to Brunton and Grimmauld Place."

Ginny saw the woman just appear behind Harry and couldn't resist asking the next question. "Why aren't you screaming about how she can't apparate within Hogwarts grounds, Hermione?"

"It's not apparation." Harry and Hermione said in stereo. Harry nodded to 'Mione and she continued on without him. "Those wards have no effect on alternate forms of transportation."

"Was that in Hogwarts: A History?" Ron added.

"No, Ronald. The Sailor Teleport worked just fine back in December. Simple logic and relevant historical data support the theory without earlier precedent."

"Mercury would have said the same thing." Pluto affirmed. "But that isn't why I'm here."

"And why are you here? Not that I mind, you are always welcome of course, but I am curious." Harry asked.

Pluto handed Hermione a new envelope. "Her acceptance letter, of course. All printed out and ready for signing."

Hermione was going to protest not being able to hand write the whole response until she read Pluto's offering. Impressive.

"Oh. Well then. You really are good at these, aren't you Pluto?"

It didn't even occur to her that Pluto didn't have a rejection letter in hand just in case. Sailor Pluto's eyes sparkled.

"I have had lot's of practice."

As Hermione pulled out a quill and some ink, she and Harry both tried not to think about how much practice Pluto's had in this kind of thing.

* * *

A head of bushy brown hair bounced along the sidewalk. It was a perfect study of gravity, air resistance and momentum. All at once rather near the projected end point of the head's trek to the library and back, an equal and opposite force applied itself.

There was a shiny black Rolls Royce parked at the curb in front of Juliet's home and a man, maybe a bodyguard, was holding the door open for someone else. The other person got out of the car.

"Excuse me," the attractive blonde woman coming out of the car said, "Is this your house dear?"

Juliet knew who this woman was. Everyone knew who this woman was.

Squee.

Juliet unfroze long enough to nod yes and then re-freeze.

"I was just about to ring the bell when I spotted you coming. Do you think you could introduce me to your parents, dear? It seems that my son is interested in your sister and I'd like to know a bit more about her."

Juliet forced herself to nod again. "Yes, Ma'am. I'd be honored to tell you anything you want, Ma'am."

"I'm sure you and your parents must be very proud of Hermione, getting into Hogwarts and all of that."

Juliet's mood dropped visibly. "I'm quite proud of her. But you see... my parents..."

The blonde woman's eyes narrowed slightly, "Please continue dear. You won't get in trouble, promise."

Not one to refuse authority figures without a very good cause, Juliet continued in great detail.

* * *

Lord Voldemort sat in his dark, dank throne room and contemplated the mess before him.

The mess in question was a pile of organs, bones and blood that until recently had been a promising Romanian initiate into his ranks. Really though, he absolutely had to stop killing the messenger. He didn't have so many left that he could just kill them on a whim any longer. Those days were behind him now.

Why did the young European pureblood become a maze of wizard parts, you ask? It was the simple yet deadly task of delivering the day's Daily Prophet at a time when someone else was supposed to have done the task. It wasn't that the Dark Lord hated people who performed work aside from that assigned to them. No. It was that he knew the wizard who was supposed to be performing this task left on a mission yesterday and did not return. None returned from yesterday's assigned missions.

And then there were the headlines. In big, bold and defiant lettering, a veritable holy war had been called down on him and his followers. Minister Greengrass and Potter were vocal supporters for obvious reasons. Support from the muggle ruling elite of the United Kingdom and Japan was an unpleasant surprise. Weak as individual muggles may be, Tom Riddle knew the concept of strength in numbers and two modern nations represented vast numbers. It didn't help that Potter and the Princess donated one hundred thousand gold coins… alien gold coins… to the repair and defense of the muggle palace as well as an equal sum of alien gold to aid the families of those muggles killed in the attack. Even worse, the I.C.W. has officially come out in support of Greengrass and Potter, going so far as to send continental aurors to Britain to reinforce their nearly extinct auror corps.

A week ago, having the support of werewolves, vampires and giants meant something. Today? They were not enough; not with Voldemort's wizarding forces dwindling so quickly. Where did he go wrong?

The Department of Mysteries battle was a only a minor setback. True, he lost some of his more loyal followers, but there were more where they came from. He was outed in front of the Minister, but the Ministry was still far too weak to put up any real fight at the time. With so many of Potter's friends brutalized and with Black dead, Potter became broken shell of a person by the end of the night. Delving too deeply into Potter's mind had been a mistake in the Ministry Atrium, one he wouldn't repeat, but he did return to the boy's mind afterwards. He just had to be careful about it. When he did so, the pain and misery he saw there were breathtakingly beautiful to the Dark Lord.

Voldemort expected things to work to his favor. Severus would get the boy. Severus would make the boy suffer unimaginable pain. Severus would break the boy. And then... Severus would 'accidentally' let the boy escape his confinement... right into a trap of Voldemort's own devising. It would have been grand. With Potter dead, Severus would have no reason to continue the charade he was playing; he would sew the entire school with potions custom made to hurt Voldemort's enemies while helping his allies, thus leading to a great and bloody insurrection. The deadly chaos would have allowed fully trained Death Eaters to sneak in undetected, a special assassination force sent to cut down all light professors and staff while leaving the fate of light leaning students to his own young supporters. The Dark Lord himself would have met Dumbledore in the Great Hall demanding complete surrender in exchange for mercy for the students. Voldemort's promise of mercy would have been false, but Dumbledore didn't need to know that until after he surrendered his wand.

It all went pear shaped on Potter's birthday when the boy had his 'international accidental magic event'. The boy simply vanished and no-one had any idea where he went. It's true that several of Voldemort's tasks and goals were still progressing on schedule, but many of his followers were expending great effort searching for the boy with nothing to show for it. Malfoy apparently found the boy, but he didn't bother to report back and he died much too far away from any other Death Eater teams for them to follow his trail until Rookwood was put on the case.

Then Harry Potter came back from his little vacation. Since his return, the conquest of Magical Britain has just been getting further and further out of reach. Even prancing about as a girl, Potter managed to do more harm to the dementors with just two spells than the rest of England managed in all of recorded history. That attack didn't cost Voldemort any of his wizard allies, but it did embolden his enemies. The second attack on Diagon Alley was yet another near victory turned loss... and that one cost him Death Eaters; Death Eaters who didn't return to his service when an assault on the Ministry gave them the chance to do exactly that. The giants failed him in Hogsmeade, but again they were expendable. Other smaller raids were still succeeding for the most part and Scrimgeour was losing the war one small raid at a time.

Then SHE appeared.

No longer was Usagi Serenity merely a ghost or a second face to the Boy-Who-Lived. The Moon Princess officially returned to life. She was obscenely powerful, she was light aligned and she possessed some form of immortality. Could there even be light horcruxes? In all his years of research, Tom Riddle had never seen the least suggestion that such a thing was possible. Even if there was no such thing as a light horcrux, clearly that didn't stop this girl from coming back to life and claiming a title long relegated to superstition and storybooks.

Voldemort knew that there was more truth in old legends than most would believe. He knew the Deathly Hallows were real- he'd even come to realize that Albus Dumbledore had mastered the Wand of Destiny though it's fate after his death is unclear. The legend... the old religion of the Moon Queen... a legend that neither Tom Riddle nor Harry Potter would have ever been exposed to until one of them quite literally stumbled into an enchanted spring. Potter couldn't have done so well against the forces arrayed against him alone. Troublesome as he was, Dumbledore had been doing the Dark Lord a great favor by keeping the boy isolated and nearly friendless. China changed that. With the Moon Princess on his arm and a group of powerful, disciplined fighters such as the Senshi standing behind him, Potter may not have needed the purebloods to change their colors in droves. And yet the purebloods _were_ turning. The battle for the hearts and minds of Britain's magical elite had turned in Potter's- or rather Princess Serenity's favor. Most magicals were sheep after all, even the purebloods, and they followed whoever presented the best claim to leadership. The Heir of Slytherin was a powerful title and a banner to rally around. The Crown Princess of the Moon, unfortunately for Voldemort, was far more powerful.

Even if he discounted those fools that held to the old ways, true Slytherins were turning to Serenity as well. Cunning and ambition could take you far under a Dark Lord, but it could take you much further under a Crown Princess. _This _Crown Princess laid claim to an empire that spanned whole planets instead of mere islands and continents. Loath as he was to admit it, following Serenity was the proper Slytherin thing to do for just about anyone other than him. The only way for him to restore the old power structure was to enslave her or kill her outright, and she was proving to be a harder target to hit than Potter himself now that Voldemort's own resources were drying up.

Bella. Bella was lost to him. That one fact hurt what was left of Tom Riddle far more than he would admit.

The Dark Lord knew something had gone wrong when she went to seek out Potter at the muggle palace, but the press wasn't saying much aside from the fact that there was an attack and that the attack was beaten back. That and that the wizarding world was engaging in official talks with the muggle world for the first time in centuries because of said attack. This did not bode well for a long term 'divide and conquer' strategy of world conquest.

Yet all was not lost. At present, there were two powers he knew little about that Potter has consistently used to best his followers... even himself... in recent months. Jusenkyo and avatar magic. With Rookwood dead and Bella unaccounted for, Voldemort would have to run the risk of abandoning England for a time. True, the followers left to him were likely to hide in corners and shadows or claim the imperious once they realized how far afield their Master was about to go... but they were of little value now and could be pulled back to him by their Dark Marks later.

Besides, once Voldemort returned empowered by the very magics Harry Potter has used so effectively of late, they would all bow before him. They would all bow low, or they would suffer a the hands of the most powerful magical being to ever live.

Without warning, Voldemort rose from his throne and apparated out of his chambers. He would not return for some time.

* * *

Hermione was grinning like she'd just gotten laid.

Not that she had, mind you. The urge to borrow Harry from Usagi hadn't been more than a light background buzz for some time and she wasn't about to whore herself out just to scratch an itch. No, she had an entirely different reason to be stupid-happy when she sat down for dinner in the Great Hall one evening in late April.

"What's gotten into you- or should I say 'who'?" Lavender asked from Ron's lap.

"Hmm?" Hermione registered the blonde's question. "Oh, nothing like that I assure you. I just had a wonderful conversation with the Headmistress."

"Really? What about?" Harry sat down next to his best friend and Usagi sat down next to him. "I haven't seen you smile like that since the whole Fifth Year Ravenclaw-Hufflepuff class made straight O's on your O.W.L. pre-exam."

Hermione tried not to blush. She _was_ rather proud of that class's progress.

"I shouldn't say anything yet." There were incredulous stares all around. "The Headmistress is going to be making an announcement soon. I don't want to ruin the surprise before she can tell everyone."

Needless to say, the next four minutes were a study on Hermione's ability to resist begging, bribes and blackmail until Minerva McGonagall stood before the Head Table. She had the sorting hat and a familiar three legged stool with her.

"Attention! May I have your attention, please?" Of course, from her it wasn't really a question.

Noise in the Great Hall fell off. She may not be Albus Dumbledore, but in many ways McGonagall was scarier than the last Headmaster and discipline was one of those ways.

"It has recently come to my attention that a young witch was denied her opportunity to attend Hogwarts with the rest of you who are currently Second Year students. Due to recent changes in this witch's life, she may now attend Hogwarts as she was originally destined to do. She will, of course, be more than a little behind her new classmates. Because of this, she will be sitting in with our current First Years but also getting private lessons to help her catch up to her peers as quickly as possible." The Headmistress made a gesture to the main entry doors. "Hagrid? Is she ready?"

The student body turned as one from Minerva to their Magical Creatures professor who was standing in the partially open doors. He was smiling widely. "Yes, Headmistress. I got 'er right 'ere."

"Very well." Minerva raised her voice and called clearly, "Granger, Juliet."

There were more than a few gasps and whispers as as a thirteen year old girl with warm brown eyes and bushy brown hair strolled purposely down the middle of the hall. Juliet was focused on the stool at the far end, knowing what was about to happen. It didn't keep her eyes from slipping to the ceiling and it's enchantments or to the section of Gryffindor table her sister favored if the letters home were any indication.

And they were. Hermione was smiling wide and waving to the unsorted witch. Juliet smiled back as a bit of her nervous tension slipped away. Only a bit... she was still a tightly coiled spring.

When Harry put his hand in Hermione's as a show of support, he didn't think she was going to squeeze hard enough to crush his finger bones. Maybe she was a bit more excited than he expected her to be.

The oldest witch to be sorted in decades sat on the three legged stool and let Headmistress McGonagall place the old leather hat on her head as had been done for every Hogwarts student in the school's entire history.

"GRYFFINDOR!" The sorting hat yelled quickly.

Yes, the Granger girls were brilliant, but they were also scary. And really, as if there were any other option. Had another house been called, the Gryffindor Head of House would have leapt to the front of the hall, grabbed the sorting hat and beat it savagely.

There was much rejoicing among the Gryffindor upper years and polite applause from everyone else as a very happy looking Juliet ran over to the near end of Gryffindor Table and sat amongst the other First Years. In the older Granger's haste to sit by her sister's side, Hermione almost tore Harry's abused arm off getting up from the table.

"Um... could I to borrow the scepter, Love?" Harry managed to get out through clenched teeth. "I think I might need it."

Usagi looked away from tonight's Happy Ending and down to her man's sore arm.

"I have a better idea, my Harry." Usagi commented, a hint of mischief in her voice. "Why don't I get the disguise pen back from Hermione and I can be Head Nurse for the night."

"Yes. Brilliant. We'll do that." Usagi may have said 'nurse', but Harry was quite sure he heard 'porn star' instead.

Fucking brilliant.

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes: **

I expected this chapter to be out a week ago. Earlier than that really... but then the Holidays didn't actually give me more time to write as I thought they would. No. They stole my time with actual holiday type things like watching my kids unwrap Christmas presents and then my middle-est kid went and had a birthday. Well, I'm writing again, so we'll see how things go.

This is not the penultimate chapter, but it is close. In fact, I think I will name the penultimate chapter 'The Penultimate Chapter'. It's time to start closing plot threads without opening more.

(1) Straight from HBP chapter 19. Some parallels still work.

I am going to assume that witch cheerleading squads wouldn't really need to use the same safety requirements as their muggle counterparts and could get away with more exciting stunts. Given some time to experiment, I wouldn't doubt broomriding could become part of their routines. As I am not a serious cheerleader fan (only a dirty middle-aged man) I'll let someone else write the Harry Potter/Bring It On crossover that no one's been begging for. Ginny = Big Red?


	18. Tom's Bogus Journey 2: Electric Boogaloo

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

The Knights Who Say Ni have been lifted directly out of Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail. If you didn't already know that, then I suggest you watch the movie. It's far funnier than I will ever be.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Eighteen****: Tom's Bogus Journey 2: Electric Boogaloo**

Mid May,1997

Russia was big. It was big and it was cold and Tom Riddle felt like he should be above even setting foot in this horrid frozen wasteland. Yet if he wanted to achieve his goals without alerting any of his enemies, and if he wanted to accomplish this task in any reasonable amount of time, then he had to take the path of least magical resistance. On a trip to China from England, that meant passing through Siberia and Mongolia.

There was the odd hag for killing curse practice... an ancient cackling witch or two to Crucio... and plenty of Yeti to flay open as they cried out in dismay. Tom did so love to hear the screams of such massive, harmless creatures. Their cries always sounded like they were asking 'why'. One day he would return to Hogwarts Castle and show his new flaying techniques to that oaf Hagrid... he always did think of the poor fool as the Yetis howled. The Dark Lord held back from playing with too many muggles along the way. As tempting as it would be to slowly torture a new one every evening, he had to stay on task. Jusenkyo.

After countless unremarkable days traveling by means both magical and muggle... portkeys were scarce in this part of the world... Tom finally turned south and passed through a sparsely populated landscape only known for one thing really: the Tunguska Event of 1908. Tom didn't care about this. It's not like visiting the sight of that explosion's epicenter would help the Dark Lord understand how to recreate such destructive powers.

That's what avatar magic was for.

Of course, the Dark Lord knew better than to try to access that powerful magic without conquering Jusenkyo first. It was a true test of his knowledge to link Bellatrix into the ley lines beneath the surface of the Earth, a feat he rather doubted Merlin himself ever attempted. But Voldemort was fairly certain a male could not survive the ritual he and Rookwood devised. There were rumors of a male avatar, one that had not followed his female equals in their trip to England, but Voldemort did not have time to revise his ritual nor did he have adequate aides. Even Rookwood was at a loss as to the next step in that process before Bella eliminated him.

And so he turned south. South, through the near endless forests of the Russian steppe and into Mongolia. The English Dark Lord had almost hoped to meet dark wizards of some strength in the area considering how easily the Mongolian hordes ran roughshod over the ancient world for a time. Alas, nothing. Not even a light wizard or two to toy with. How the mighty have fallen.

It was a long journey... longer than he intended for it to be... but it was finally over. Scanning the minds of a few locals, the master legillimencer knew enough of the local language to force a young woman into guiding him on the final leg of the journey. He didn't much care for her body, but she was a fair cook and knew when to keep quiet even without the constant pressure of an Imperius Curse. Being the only survivor after Dark Lord Voldemort slaughtered her entire village may have had something to do with that.

Today was the day. The morning mists cleared. The sun rose. Bamboo poles emerged from the shadows, jutting out from silent pools at odd angles. Jusenkyo lay before Tom Riddle like a treasure waiting to be claimed. A riddle waiting to be solved. All he needed was the right key, and standing not far from the pools themselves was a fat bald man in worn green and brown clothing who looked to be that key.

It was time to reward the young woman whose name he hadn't even bothered to learn before taking her as a servant. She served him quietly and groveled at all the right times. It's a pity more of Lord Voldemort's lessers couldn't follow her example. He was in a good mood this morning and chose to grant her the mercy of reuniting with her loved ones.

"Avada Kedavra!"

* * *

"Good evening Headmistress." Harry called as he stepped into Minerva's office. Usagi followed on his heels and she was followed by Venus in turn.

"Thank you for coming Harry." Minerva smiled at her guests, nodding to each in turn.

She also held one hand out to offer the three chairs. Venus politely demurred and stood against the wall. The blonde Senshi wasn't here on a social call even if her close friend and sovereign was.

Minerva continued. "Your Highness... Miss Venus. It's a pleasure to see you both as always. I trust the three of you had a good day?"

"It was a long day, but a good one none the less." Harry looked down and smiled just a bit. "Hermione is still cleaning up with Flitwick. They should be done in a half hour or so."

"Would you mind telling me how things went?" The old Scot picked up a teakettle and offered her guests a cup before pouring some for herself. Harry and Usagi both accepted and took their tea as the conversation continued.

"Well..." Harry marshaled his thoughts. "I'm definitely glad we chose to do this as a set of lessons and not some kind of test or tournament. I was surprised at how few of the First through Third Years managed to clear every room... or at least the rooms 'we' cleared the first time... and how few of the older students were able to manage it after having their spell selection cut back."

"You still forget just how talented you are, Harry." Minerva smiled. "And how exceptional Professor Granger and Mister Weasley are... or were even back then."

Harry pushed down his embarrassment and spoke up again. "Still, three Ickle Firsties managed to get through your much vaunted defenses around the Philosopher's Stone some years ago and I just couldn't imagine that we were the only ones capable of pulling it off."

"I thank you for not insisting on having a troll present… or the cerebrus." Were her eyes beginning to twinkle? Was it a Headmaster/Headmistress perk to know how to do that?

"Fluffy would have been way too dangerous for anyone that didn't remember his one weakness, and 'Mione felt that having a fake 'unconscious' troll there was more accurate to the original scenario." Harry saw the look in his Headmistress's eye. "Still had two witches scream and faint at the sight anyway... and one older wizard if I remember correctly... and it's not like we can have surprise maiden-saving quizzes. You were right to award points for sheer dumb luck during the whole girl's loo incident. I rather doubt any witch in the castle would want to take Hermione's place in that scenario even if it got her house points."

Harry took a moment to take in the aroma of the tea in his hands. Looking back, it was a true miracle that three Gryffindor First Years didn't die on Halloween night, Nineteen ninety-one.

He changed gears. "Anyways, I think Cho needs to know I found a new seeker for her team."

"Oh?" Minerva looked genuinely interested. She always liked a good quidditch match.

"Yes. A Second Year... Perks, I think. He caught the correct winged key just about as quickly as I did. His team crossed the chess board pretty quickly too."

"I'll be sure to mention Mister Perks to Fillius at breakfast."

Harry was distracted from Minerva's reply when a soft hand came down on his knee. Looking over, he saw a very pleased Crown Princess smiling warmly at him. He was learning quickly that she very much appreciates the time and dedication her Intended puts into his classes and his students. Teaching others to save themselves was the logical extension of a healthy 'saving people' thing. Usagi would never be able to teach more than a handful of future avatars the way of the Senshi but she was more than willing to help Harry in class and reward his successes privately.

The tender moment between young Wizard and Crown Princess was finally interrupted when Minerva felt the time was right to get into the real purpose of this meeting. A soft cough pulled the two teens' eyes away from each other.

"As delighted as I am in your success, Harry, I didn't ask you up here to discuss your students." Minerva said.

"No?" Perhaps she hoped for an update on the war?

"No. In fact, it wasn't my idea to ask you up in the first place." She continued. "Albus requested it."

Wait, what? "A- Albus?"

"Indeed, my boy." A somewhat mirthful and distinctly male voice came from behind Harry's chair.

Harry spun out of his chair fast enough to put Usagi and Venus on alert. He aimed a wand in the direction of the most unexpected interruption only to find Venus pointing a glowing finger at...

…a painting.

Albus chuckled from behind his gilt wooden frame.

"Oh my. I don't think Voldemort ever had his wand on me so quickly from a resting position." The old man- the painting of an old man, that is, held both empty hands up. "Once again I find myself wanting desperately to award Gryffindor House points when you are no longer eligible to earn them. Pity."

"H- Headmaster?" Harry, froze in place.

He no longer felt the need to have his wand out, but his arm refused to fall. The old man was dead. But. The old man was there, in his office, staring at Harry with those damned twinkly eyes of his... even if they were made of paint and magic. A few confused seconds later, Usagi helped Harry with his stiff appendage problem, much to Albus's amusement and Minerva's relief.

Venus stood down as well. She felt kind of silly threatening to blast a painting. The portrait hadn't sprouted arms, legs and breasts or demanded random people's energy or threatened to steal their heart crystals or anything. Bummer.

"Hello again, Harry- or should I say Professor Potter?" Twinkle, twinkle.

"Errrr, yeah. I mean, I am a Professor... full Professor and not just an Assistant but you knew that didn't you?" Harry snapped out of it. Mostly. It felt weird talking to a dead man- one he knew in life. "So this meeting is with you then, Sir. Okay... what can I do for you today?"

The Headmaster's portrait smiled at his reception, seemingly pleased that Harry was ready to get down to business and not reminisce.

"We have a lot to talk about, young man- important lessons that I had hoped to teach you in person before your final confrontation with Tom, but I seem to have run out of time." The old man folded his hands together in the office he had been painted into; a copy of the Headmaster's office as it was before the attack. "Still, there is much you must learn before you can hope to meet your destiny and thankfully I can still teach you much of what you need to know, even bound as I am in this portrait."

"Well then," Harry started, hopeful that tonight may help shorten the war in some way, "I'm all ears."

Albus's portrait glanced about the room before addressing his golden boy. "I'm afraid that what I have to say to you, Harry, is a vitally important secret. So delicate is this information that I must insist these fine ladies all leave the room before I can say anything more on the subject."

Harry's hopeful, friendly attitude vanished before Albus even finished his last sentence. "They will be staying, Headmaster."

Minerva had to stifle a gasp. Usagi failed to react to the sudden tension as she knew how Harry would react to the painting's demand. Venus gave Harry a cute grin and wink. Watching cute boys argue with portraits that argued back was much more fun than physics homework.

"I cannot allow that, Harry." Albus called with equal resolve.

"I cannot stay." Harry intoned before turning to the Headmistress. "If that is all, Minerva..."

"But..." Minerva was beside herself.

"Harry. You simply do not understand the consequences should the wrong people discover what I know. It is our only hope to counter Tom and push back the darkness. This is the key to winning the war, young man, but it must be kept between you and me. No one else must know if we are to keep Tom and his Death Eaters from divining our plans and removing all hope of victory." Albus was speaking in his best 'disappointed grandfather' tone. It would have worked on Harry a year ago, but today?

"The war we're winning? That war? The Death Eaters aren't in any position to snatch victory away from anyone right now, Albus."

Harry liked having information that Albus didn't have for once. Headmaster's portraits were known to spend a time after their creation sleeping, and sleeping portraits could not keep up with the news outside of their own frames. Granted, in every case prior, the other Headmasters' portraits were ready and waiting to bestow all possible gossip to the New Guy. This time, there were no previous portraits to consult. They were all lost on Christmas Eve along with much of the original Headmaster's tower.

"This isn't the time for levity, young man." Albus admonished.

"Professor Potter is being entirely truthful, Albus." Minerva stated, hoping that her use of the young Lord's title within Hogwarts would help sway her predecessor.

"While the night of your passing was a dark point in our struggle," Everyone heard her voice waver for a moment. It still hurt. "conditions have improved quite a bit. While even one victim is one too many, the fact remains that Harry and Her Highness have truly turned the tide. If you had been willing to wait just an hour or two more after your waking to see Harry, I could have told you that."

"I... I didn't know." The old man in the painting looked confused. Pained even. "Please forgive me my haste, Minerva dear. I left in a most abrupt manner and it hadn't occurred to me that conditions may have improved so quickly after my demise."

Harry was beginning to feel a touch guilty. Not much, but the feeling was there.

"Albus, we all suffered the night you died. I came close to losing everything in a fight with Riddle that same evening." Harry once again felt Usagi's hand cover his. It gave him strength to continue. "Please don't think that we are winning _because_ you died. We are winning in spite of it. We have allies beyond the Order of the Phoenix now... and many of those pureblooded bigots that supported Tom before are now tripping over themselves to impress Usagi. Who knew? Looks like being long lost Moon Royalty has its perks."

Harry looked Usagi in the eyes and winked. She giggled.

The portrait rallied. "Be that as it may, the information I have in my possession is vital to our final victory over Tom. He cannot be defeated without it. You must learn this information, Harry... you and no one else."

"And once again, Headmaster, I disagree." Harry replied. "We are winning because knowledge and resources are being shared. I understand that some secrets must remain within a close group of confidants, but our disagreement lies in who is trustworthy and who is not. I trust everyone in this room is on the same page as far as the war effort is concerned and sufficiently 'ranked' to hear what you have to say."

"If Albus wishes it, I am willing to leave the room." Minerva offered, hoping to help simplify things.

There was a time that she would have immediately lit into Harry for disrespecting the Headmaster so... but that was before Harry took Albus's informal post of 'Leader of the Light' and began turning the war around with a mix of direct magical combat and political moves; the kind of moves that Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore should have been capable of performing yet never tried.

"What you must understand is that there are no secrets between Usagi and me. She's more important to me than anything and anyone. Even if she left the room now, she would know what you and I speak of before reaching her bedchambers for the night. And when 'Mione asks what we came up here for, I'll no doubt get her opinion on whatever it is you're going to say. You must realize by now that I don't like withholding things from 'Mione; she usually ends up figuring it out anyway... usually just in time to save my life in some way too."

Albus held silent for a moment, seemingly weighing his options as things were not going according to plan. Someone else beat him to the punch.

"I could leave or stay as my Harry wishes," Usagi announced, "but you must understand that we fight the darkness together. It makes no difference to me how strong the dark lord or how powerful the demon. We are united in purpose and we will be victorious. If Harry were not destined to battle this dark lord. I and my Senshi would have heard of your troubles eventually and come to meet Voldemort on the field of battle. We would have won too. We are here now and we will defeat him. If you have some clue which will help us defeat him that much sooner, than please reveal it so that we may end this war and save a few more lives in the process."

Dumbledore still looked unconvinced. Harry's voice rose to continue his Love's argument.

"If Minerva chooses to step out, then that is her decision. Fine. Usagi and Venus? They stay with me. They stay with me or I leave with them." Harry was tempted to pull out the sword of Gryffindor just as a show of force. Well... Usagi probably would have thought the showmanship sexy and Venus would surely have eaten it up but the old man is not easily swayed by shiny things. In the end, he settled for staring down the painting. He doubted portraits were capable of legillimency.

"Very well." Albus conceded defeat. "Minerva. If you would please find something to do outside of the office for a time, I would be most appreciative."

Minerva nodded silently to her former superior before standing up and moving around her desk. When she stopped to address her Defense Professor, he gave her a hug.

"If you should need anything..." Minerva managed to get out before Harry kissed her cheek.

"Of course." Harry responded and let her go.

Minerva excused herself from the room.

"Well?" Harry was done waiting. He'd rather be snuggling with his Love right now and as much as the idea of snogging or more in the Headmaster's office appealed to him, this was not the time.

"Very well." Albus straightened himself out. "Do you recall the private lessons we were having?"

Harry nodded. The information on Tom Riddle was confusing at first but quickly became invaluable as a propaganda tool.

"What I am about to relate to you would have been the next lesson in that series, my boy." Albus began. "You see, I knew as soon as I heard of the attack on your parents' home on that fateful night that that Voldemort didn't really die. We have spoken of that fact already, even as early as your first year here..."

Harry nodded for him to continue.

"What I was initially unsure of was the method by which he escaped death's embrace. Only a few dark, powerful and well hidden magics are capable of granting even the barest hint of immortality to a being." Albus saw Harry about to interrupt, so he answered the most obvious question next. "True, the Philosopher's Stone may extend one's life indefinitely when used properly, but it works to stave of natural causes of death. It is no shield against deliberate violence or catastrophe. What Tom discovered was much worse. You see, he found a process by which he could remove parts of his own soul and place them in soul containers... horcuxes as they are known in the books which speak of them. The process involves murdering someone in cold blood and taking advantage of the harm such violence causes to the killer's own soul to tears a small portion of said soul away from the main portion. When such a soul shard is bound to an earthly container, it comes to be an anchor of sorts. One cannot pass into the afterlife if a portion of their soul is still present in this world. Tom took advantage of this process, and in so doing made it impossible for anyone to kill him unless they should discover and destroy any horcruxes he made."

"Horcruxes... more than one?" Harry asked. He began to see how this might make things difficult. He didn't fancy hopping around England- or worse, the whole world- looking for things Voldemort wouldn't want anyone to be able to find.

"Is that all?" Venus nearly snorted.

Harry turned to find the patron Senshi of St. Valentine's Day buffing her nails on her uniform top. She seemed underwhelmed. A quick look at Usagi showed some small amusement in her reaction though it wasn't as visible as with Venus.

"We first dealt with that kind of crap on my very first day on the job... Princess here was dealing with Rainbow Crystals even before I joined on." Venus moved to better address the dead Headmaster. "Zoisite and Kunzite were both hunting down the Seven Great Youma who were trapped inside these Rainbow Crystal things. Zoisite was actually pretty good at finding the damn things too... the little pansy. It wouldn't be the last time we had to battle monsters who could literally pop out of the woodwork to come after you either. The end was always the same though, wasn't it, _Princess_?"

Minako threw a wink at her Princess at the end.

"Venus is right, Headmaster. We Senshi often find ourselves battling the effects of soul binding or life stealing artifacts. I think our record speaks for itself." Usagi added. "We'll just have Mercury isolate Tom Riddle's power signature... which she's probably already done anyway... and do a long range scan looking for things that feel like him."

Venus jumped back into it. "Got any idea how many of these things we're going to be looking for old man?"

Albus overlooked the blonde Senshi's playful disrespect and answered as best he could. "I'm not entirely certain, though I suspect Professor Slughorn may know the truth of it. It's most likely a magically powerful number... three or five... seven or thirteen perhaps. His own damaged soul would count as one of the shard pieces... and I do believe he made one quite by accident, one that even he may not have realized was in existence until you destroyed it... again quite by accident."

Harry reviewed his past for a likely suspect. "The diary?"

Albus shook his head in the negative. "I am certain that Tom's diary was in fact a horcrux... and you made me proud by destroying it when you were only twelve years old... but no. I'm quite sure he made the diary horcrux intentionally. The accidental horcrux, if you could call it that, was your scar."

Harry's hand reflexively shot to his forehead, to the very scar in question. It has healed quite well since the summer and was nearly invisible unless you were within arm's length. He'd nearly forgotten about it. Dear Lord, how could he have forgotten about the one constant pain which tormented him for most of his life?

Well, there was a magical alien princess super veela sitting right next to him. Of course. With Usagi in his life, why would he even bother worrying about such unimportant things like injuries that healed in her presence. Wait... hold on there...

"This is why you were so concerned when you noticed my scar fading away at the beginning of the year, wasn't it? You knew it was a horcrux?"

"I suspected as much." Albus replied. "Not only did you survive a killing curse but you gained the ability to speak to snakes; that talent is rare… unheard of in the Potter line even according to the Potter family history tomes. You received that power through your curse scar connection- through the horcrux- just as you received the visions which began to crop up the summer before your forth year."

"First, you had no right to run off with Potter family history books. Second, if I had a bit of Tommy's soul stuck in my head, then how was Occlumency supposed to help with that? Legillimency doesn't even work without eye contact, right? I don't see that being an effective block when my link to Voldemort went deeper. I've always thought that my lessons with Snape were little more than opportunities for him to mess with me in the most painful way possible. There was no way he could still consider me to be a pampered prince after having seen what he saw. Inconceivable. And fourth…" Harry really started to look unhappy now, not that he wasn't already going downhill fast. "And fourth… how did you plan on getting the horcrux out of me? Why didn't you get rid of the damn thing when I was little?"

"I was unsure at the time precisely what Tom had done. Only when I learned of your defeat of Tom Riddle's diary did I finally have proof that you were likely a recipient of a horcrux." Albus answered.

"Okay. Fine." Harry began pacing. "You figure it out when I'm twelve. How come I still had the damn thing in my head at sixteen? Why didn't you get rid of it? You knew it was there… a piece of the bloody dark lord. In. My. Head."

Harry stopped his rant with a finger pointed at his temple and his gaze piercing the Headmaster's portrait. At first, the man in the portrait couldn't look Harry in the eyes.

"You must understand, Harry. There are precious few ways that a horcrux can be undone. You are unbelievably fortunate that your wife's affinity for white magic removed the horcrux from your scar without harming your own soul in the process. Without her intervention, only Tom himself could have removed the soul shard in your scar and he certainly would not have done it willingly had he known it was there."

Harry was the one looking at the floor now. "How was he supposed to do it then? Not a ritual. Not if you were going to trick him into it."

"You simply must understand. The prophecy chose you, Harry. You more than anyone else need to know the value of self sacrifice. It is for the Greater Good of the whole Wizarding World that you accept this truth and meet your fate willingly. So much depended on you. So much still depends on you."

Albus hadn't really answered the question. Harry knew he was avoiding it. Usagi knew. Hell, even Venus could tell. Self sacrifice. Albus thought that Harry needed to learn self sacrifice. Harry; the boy who lost his parents and his childhood before he was two… the boy who jumped on a troll's back when he was eleven just to distract the beast from a screaming girl… the boy who risked his life to save anyone and everyone he knew that needed saving. Hermione. Ginny. Ron. Gabrielle. Sirius. Usagi. Cuteness. Harry; the young man that jumped out of the top floor of Tokyo Tower to save a little girl he'd only known for a few hours. Albus bloody Dumbledore thought the young man still needed to learn more about self sacrifice. Did he think Harry's been doing practice runs his whole life? What more could he give other than his life?

_Was that__ it__?_ His life. He was still alive… therefore he hadn't learned his lesson yet?

Usagi saw the storm of emotions crossing Harry's face and she shed tears for his pain. Without further comment, Harry marched up to the office door and passed through it. Usagi quickly followed.

"Harry? Harry, please!" Albus called after them.

"He was sure you were getting better," Venus mumbled as she turned from the enchanted painting, "guess not. With friends like you, who needs enemas?"

If any of the other Senshi had heard Venus's parting comment, then Mercury would have known to collect on the 'Stupid Things Minako Says' pool for that week to the tune of three thousand yen.

* * *

"Welcome, Sir, to Pools of Sorrow." The man calling himself a local guide called out to Lord Voldemort. "In local language it _Jusenkyo_. Many, many pools in valley and each have own tragedy happen there!"

The Dark Lord ignored the fool at first. There was a tangible force in the air. He could feel the magic of the springs. Perhaps he could learn the secrets of these pools and refine transfiguration to a point never before seen in history. The dark lord slowly raised his wand and began a series of scanning charms.

"You a strange one, no?" The Guide pushed but Voldemort paid him no mind... at first. "Very bad you fall in springs…"

"Crucio!" He bellowed. The weak, overweight man fell to his knees in a screaming fit and emptied his bowels soon after. "None may make such threats to Lord Voldemort without punishment!"

Lord Voldemort lifted his curse, lest this one burn out too quickly. The weakling began to moan in a most annoying manner.

"If you wish to live, you will tell me which pool holds the curse of the drowned planetary avatar known as Sailor Moon!"

If anything, the guide's moans became more pitiful and more annoying. "M-many apologies h-honored cus-stomer. Spring of Drowned Senshi falling silent a-after English customer falling in..."

"Crucio!" Voldemort held the curse for ten more seconds "Do not play with me, worm! Look into my eyes..."

Voldemort grabbed the quivering man's jaw and turned his gaze. Under such a magical onslaught, even an experienced Occlumens would be vulnerable to his probe. Voldemort entered a mind unguarded.

Curious. There were several pools with human female curses attached to them... and the guide was not lying about the one which held Crown Princess Serenity either. It would seem that her spirit did in fact escape the water's magics only to be replaced by an unlucky Himalayan mouse hare. Maybe the fool is not so useless.

On the other hand... Voldemort now knows of at least three human female pools he could pick from... the images from the guides mind were quite clear on that. What does it matter which one he uses?

Lord Voldemort brought up his wand to levitate the guide and began a short trek into the cursed valley. 'Cursed' they say? Bah! What kind of fool would lose his footing here? It only proves just how inferior all others are compared to the greatest Dark Lord in world history.

Not two minutes later, the Dark Lord and his hovering prisoner slowed to a stop before an innocent looking pool of water just over one hundred meters from the Guide's own hut.

"Perhaps a test..." He drawled as the magic holding the Jusenkyo Guide was dispelled.

_SPLASH_

"Aiya!" The young woman shouted as she broke the pool's surface only a moment later. "Y-you dropping me into S-Spring of-"

A negligent silencing spell put an end to that horrific screeching the guide called speech. Another twist of his yew and phoenix feather wand and the soaking silent woman was once again hovering in mid air. A third twitch had the woman sailing over pool and grass alike until she impacted bodily with the roof of her own hut and rolled onto the ground.

"I dropping you into Spring of Harry Potter's Final Demise! Aaaaha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa!" Now ignoring the injured yet living guide, Voldemort released his magic's hold on the woman allowed himself to slip into the innocent looking waters.

As the waters of Jusenkyo completely embraced their next victim, a low mutter broke the silence only a short distance away.

"You... you not listening to me. Nobody listening to me when they coming to Jusenkyo. Maybe now you learn of price to pay for seeking to make curse a blessing." The comely if injured guide moved herself into a sitting position with some effort.

Back at the spring a high pitched shriek broke the morning's short peace. The guide spit out some blood and grinned.

"_Take that foreigner! __You fall in__ the Spring of Drowned __Blushing Bride__! __This is a very tragic tale of a__ young lady __who __drowned eight hundred years ago__. She was __the first daughter of a local family head__ and eager to be married__ and start a family of her own__. Sadly,__she drowned here in Jusenkyo __the very day__ she was to __wed __her noble young suitor__. Now you shall live with the body of a young woman… and the desires of a young bride." _ The guide's heated words sparked a new fire in her. Voldemort wasn't the only one to fall in the spring after all. _"Oh, no! How am I ever going to catch a man dressed like this? I need to go shopping... and... and perhaps Plum knows some nice boys? I knew having a daughter would pay off one day!"_

Back at the pool. Lord- errrr, Young Lady Voldemort was staring at her hand. Her pale, delicate hand. Almost on autopilot, she slowly emerged from the pool and sat on the ridge between it and its neighbor. Without any words, she conjured a mirror.

She was young. Mid-teens perhaps. Her complexion was smooth and clear... her nose cute and her lips just a touch on the pouty side. Voldemort pulled her wand up and wordlessly cast a drying charm over her person followed by a simple hair styling charm she last used when Tom Riddle was still well known and respected. The end result was a smooth, silky mass of wavy black hair framing eyes of silvery-grey. In truth... the Dark 'Lord' thought she looked like she could be related to Pot- Potter. Harry Potter. How could she forget _him_ even for the shortest of moments? After all, her life revolved around that boy, even when she was a dirty stinky snake-man.

It was in this realization that the 'power he knows not' struck. Harry Potter lived with the power of Jusenkyo in him, but the prophecy didn't actually say Potter had to wield his mysterious power directly... only that he would possess it. Defeat knew many forms and death was but one of them. Harry and Tom Riddle would meet again, but it would not be a confrontation that Tom or Harry or Albus expected. The heavy hand of karma fell on Lord Voldemort's cold black soul with a fiery passion. Spring of Drowned _Blushing_ _Bride_ indeed.

Voldemort's face went red as her thoughts began to betray her. Visions leaked into her mind. Visions of Harry and what it would be like to... or maybe to... or to give him some... she just couldn't stand it any longer.

"HARRRRRYYYYYYY!" The Dark Young Lady sang to the heavens. "I'M COMING FOR YOOUUUUU!"

The lithe Heiress of Slytherin leapt up from her seat between springs and quickly spun in place before another magical pool could lure her in.

-pop-

And once again, the Jusenkyo Guide was alone in her domain. Miss Riddle was no longer in the valley.

* * *

-Thump-

A heavy tome dropped onto a table in the middle of the school library.

"Careful!" One girl hissed. "Madam Pince will make us leave!"

Juliet looked at the book which was unceremoniously dropped near her elbow. Hmmmm. Looked to be about six hundred pages… and the title hinted at potions. She'd have to look into that one later- but not before she checked out her two new table-mates.

They were both young witches, shorter than the recent Gryffindor inductee and a bit less well developed. As she was thirteen, Juliet had the dubious honor of being curvier than any of the other First Year witches even if one or two were catching up. This was, sadly, yet another reason for the wizards and witches in her class to shy away from her, not that she didn't have enough of those already. She was too new; literally months behind in every class even if she was catching up quick. She was too famous; the younger sister of The Hermione Granger: Golden Trio member, Teen Head of House, dark wizard fighter and 'known' favored mistress of Professor-Chosen-One Lord Harry James Potter. She was too different; a muggleborn surrounded mostly by purebloods, even if they were less prat-ish than her big sister's letters home would lead her to believe. Juliet was given polite attention by one or two Third year Gryffindor boys as they were less intimidated than the boys in her classes, but at the same time those boys _were_ in different classes and Juliet needed proper study partners more than she needed a boyfriend. Juliet also got loads of attention from Hermione and her friends... very good attention too... but she didn't want to hold them back from their own studies as the gulf in knowledge was considerable.

Juliet was pulled from her introspection when one of her new tablemates poked her in the arm. "I'm sorry?"

The blonder of the two repeated her question with a little grin. "I was asking if you'd like to review potion ingredient preparation techniques. It was what you had trouble with last class, wasn't it?"

"Oh." Juliet did need help with that, but she didn't realize anyone had noticed. "I do seem to have trouble with the cutting and the mincing and the like. Thank you ever so much for offering to help, Miss…" Juliet drew on her memory of classroom roll calls. "Stuart?"

The witch nodded. "Christine Stuart. That's me." She then waived a hand in her less blonde friend's direction. "And this is Annabelle White. And you are Juliet Granger. Charmed, I'm sure."

Juliet saw that both witches were smiling eagerly at her, so she smiled and nodded back. Both girls had silver and green on their ties. Interesting.

"I'm afraid I'm still not quite up to speed in Potions, though I do seem to be catching up in Charms. I could help you do some revising for Flitwick..." Juliet offered, wondering if these two were being friendly or if they were being cunning and ambitions somehow.

The two blondes looked at each other before they both smiled and tried to keep their blushes down. Juliet sincerely hoped they weren't some sort of acolytes from a saphist coven looking to recruit her for blood rituals.

"Oh, no. I mean- we _can_ get together for research and revising, but that's not what we're here for." Christine aimed her pale blue eyes at Juliet's chocolate ones for as long as she could before turning away. "You see… we're part of this club… it's a witches only club here in Hogwarts… and we'd like you to be a part of it."

Eeep. "You're not trying to get me to convert, are you?"

"No!" Annabelle spoke for the first time. "It's not a religion." Only, she seemed a bit confused about it herself. "Then again… the top witch _is_ called a High Priestess, but it's not like we do any rituals or anything… well the older witches do sometimes..."

"And our High Priestess isn't doing her job anymore, is she? I think we should give her the boot." Christine huffed before rallying. "But you could help us there! You could really be an important member of our club!"

"Yes!" Annabelle added enthusiastically. "You could skip Acolyte and get right into full Priestess with what you know!"

There were some hisses from the next table over and an upper year witch told the Ickle Firsties to quiet down. Knowing they were one warning away from having an irate librarian after them, they relented.

When the two Slytherins turned back to their new Gryffindor friend, she looked a little pale.

"Could you tell us how many... well... your sister wrote home to you over the years, didn't she? She looks the type." Annabelle asked.

What an odd question, but Juliet saw no reason to run away just yet. "She did. One hundred and six times."

"Was she in the habit of writing about... _Harry Potter?"_ Christine asked with great interest.

"Yeeesssss?" Juliet answered. Both blondes lit up in excitement over the news. "She mentioned him in every single letter. She usually spent between thirty-four and eighty-seven percent of each letter explaining what she's done with Harry or how misunderstood he is or how lucky he is and so on and so forth. And how beautiful his eyes are. She mentions that quite a bit."

The Slytherin girls were clearly ecstatic.

"Oh, you simply** must** join our club." Christine clearly wanted to yell, but she was holding back as much as she could.

Juliet was getting terribly frustrated. "But what club is it?" She hissed.

Two blondes looked at each for a moment before turning back to Juliet. In an eerie airy synchronized voice, they called. "The Harry James Potter is Dreamy Fan Club."

Well... they _were_ being nice about it. And they were girls in her classes, a peer group she desperately wanted to get some recognition in. And they were obviously Slytherin (and therefore purebloods) who were willing to befriend a muggleborn Gryffindor. Juliet didn't care that they obviously wanted access to letters she had, they were being_ nice_ about it. And... and... Harry's eyes _were_ pretty...

Juliet smiled.

The celebratory squees got all three girls booted out of the library for the rest of the day. No matter; Potions practice was next and they needed to find somewhere else for that anyway.

Maybe the second Granger sister would have a happier, more relaxed magical childhood than her elder sister after all.

* * *

June 8th, 1997

This morning, Hogwarts students were beginning to take their final exams, O.W.L.'s and N.E.W.T.'s. Harry Potter was nervous, but he took his tests anyway. He was more concerned about his D.A.D.A. students and how well they had absorbed all that he had to teach them... was it enough? If Harry was concerned, then Hermione was freaking out. She needed a calming draught and three cheering charms to make it down to breakfast in the morning. She was taking exams she _**hasn't studied for**_. Her students were adding to their _**permanent records**_. At least the Defense exams were being proctored by a witch from the Wizarding Examinations Authority so Harry and Hermione wouldn't need to both take and conduct tests all week long. Before the calming draught, 'Mione was completely nutters. Luna called her a crazy bitch.

She's feeling much better now, thank you.

Half-way around the world, Crown Princess Usagi was on a whirlwind shopping extravaganza. A heavily guarded shopping whirlwind but a whirlwind none the less. There was so much to do! So many details to account for! Less than two months to go until the Big Day!

The first private ceremony would be pure Japanese tradition of course, and Empress Michiko insisted on helping Ikuko and Usagi set up all of the traditional details. Rei saw her grandfather, the shrine priest, working overtime with Sailor Pluto, the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department and even members of the JSDF as all of Japan would be turning its gaze on the Hikawa Shrine. Rei failed to see Pluto negotiating for security with the I.C.W., ki adepts from the Joketsuzoku and ninjas from the Hidden Leaf Village in the Land of Fire. It would be more than a little difficult to organize magical and non-magical attendance considering the Japanese Imperial Family and several members of the House of Windsor would be in attendance. Don't forget Tenchi and his girls. That's an alien Imperial family to account for. Oh, and don't forget Saffron, the God-King of Phoenix Mountain as well as official emissaries from Shampoo's people, the Joketsuzoku. Oh, and any other officially recognized Magical Girl who wishes to attend.

Then there was the public ceremony to arrange as well. Everyone would be attending that too. In fact, more than everyone. Way, way more.

The company in charge of the Tokyo Dome cleared their calendar for Sailor Moon. Rumor has it that every seat is already accounted for and TV Tokyo was begging for rights to televise the event. Maria Carey's record making ticket sell-out last year, with one hundred and fifty thousand tickets, just got its ass kicked. Crown Princess Serenity did request that all proceeds from the endeavor be put towards a new charitable foundation aimed at promoting peace and cooperation between magical and non-magical beings of all nations. There were grumbles from the corporate interests; soft grumbles only, mind you. As inflamed with magical girl wedding mania as Japan was, no one wanted to be seen as openly against Sailor Moon. It would be bad for business.

Spin another quarter of the way around the world, and young Dark Lady Voldemort was just dragging herself out of bed. It wasn't morning there, but she had a late night.

* * *

Astrakhan, Russia

At the base of the Volga River not far from the Caspian Sea.

Mary Riddle, usually known as Tom Marvolo Riddle... until a cute guy asked for her name last night, opened her eyes. The ceiling above her was white, as were the walls around her and the cotton sheets wrapped around her bare skin. She arrived wherever 'here' was last night and decided to relax for an evening. After traveling through the wilderness of China and Tibet into Western Russia with few of the advantages of civilization to sooth the weary traveler, a simple glass of wine was truly appreciated. She couldn't let Harry and his allies learn of her plans, not until she could face him directly, but after spending over ten years as a shade, she really learned to appreciate a bottle of wine. Having found this city, she immediately memory charmed the hotel staff into believing that she was a favored client and that she had already paid in full.

Sitting up in her bed, she took in the muggle-ish look of the room; a quick glance out the window gave her the impression that lunch time had come and gone. There was a nude young man sleeping next to her. He looked a lot like Harry. That is, of course, why he was with her and she was not alone.

After getting into town last night and having a few drinks, Mary began to plan out the best way to win Harry Potter's heart. The Innocent Angel act was doomed to failure, of course. Girl Next Door was out too. She had to go for Bad Girl. She was a very bad girl. Bad girls knew how to please a man, right? Mary did remember being on the other side of that equation, but that didn't mean she'd be any good at _**it**_ without some practice. That's what the nude Potter substitute was for. She charmed his eyes green and added a scar for her own nerves, and then she'd charmed him to act how she imaged Harry would act once they finally met up again. She would need to be properly penitent for having just slaughtered that man stealing Moon Whore. She'd need to be 'punished' right?

No wonder she was sore everywhere. And when did the cat shit down her throat? She didn't even have a cat. Oh, wait… he made her swallow. That was gross. Harry could do that to her and it would be okay… but the muggle on the bed? He had to die. Sure, he was merely a muggle and she was going to kill him anyway, but now his death was going to hurt more.

Miss Riddle slipped out of bed and grabbed her wand. She needed to use the loo and take a hot shower. Definitely a hot shower. She hadn't had a good soak since crossing through Latvia.

A flick of her wand, and the water was running. Two more flicks, and both hot and cold were mixing in the shower nozzle. Mary spelled the bathroom door shut and set her wand on the counter. Pushing the shower curtain to one side, she slipped one dainty foot into the shower to test the water.

The primordial scream of male rage that shook the hotel shocked everyone in a four room radius and made the cleaning lady wet herself. Five minutes later, the hotel was on fire and everyone was fleeing for their lives. A wrathful snake demon was killing anything that moved and obliterating everything that didn't.

* * *

"What news, Minerva?" The old man asked from behind his gilded frame.

Minerva sighed and set down her quill.

"Albus... I know that you have your secrets. _Important_ secrets. Having said that, by Circe, what did you tell the poor boy? If I so much as imply that I will speak your name, his face loses all emotion save anger. He will not speak of it... whatever it is."

"I had hoped Harry would be able to put the past behind him and see what is import-"

But the magical memory of a man was to be harshly rebuked. "Put it behind him? I may not know of what you two spoke behind closed doors but I damn well know Harry's past! None could put that behind them!"

"But things have changed! He knows this... Princess Usagi delivered to us a miracle that none save perhaps Merlin himself could have divined. My previous plans, however necessary they were before, have been negated yet this does not lessen the import of what I have to say to him now!" Albus wrung his hands in frustration.

"Let us not rehash this argument once again!" Minerva was finding that, for the first time in her life, she could silence her former superior. It was an exhilarating ability and all too often necessary these days. "Speaking to you is not the only important activity our Defense Professor could be doing this week as you well know."

"Quite." Albus seemed to deflate. "And how is he doing? How is Professor Granger coping? I need not walk the halls to know what effect the end of year exams would have on her."

"I had their exams scored first, of course..." Albus smirked at that. It payed to have the top job. "It should come as no surprise to you that they are both true stars in the field of Defense. Even if they had not already been awarded N.E.W.T.'s for their past efforts, Harry and Hermione would both pass the Defense N.E.W.T. with Outsandings today should they wish it."

Albus's smug expression left no doubt that this was a foregone conclusion.

"In Charms and Transfiguration, they both still achieved Exceed Expectations. Hermione also achieved that level in Astronomy and Arithmancy though her other classes slipped to Acceptable. Harry's low score was Potions, for which he received a Poor grade." Minerva took a moment to reflect and Albus nodded his head. "All told, it was a remarkable effort for the both of them considering that they were teaching more often than they were being taught this past year."

"Indeed." Albus offered. "In fact, their hard work would lead me to suggest a special distinction be granted them by Hogwarts at the leaving feast... if I didn't already know that the two of them have more medals and plaques than they'd care for just now."

Minerva nodded along.

"I don't envy you having to replace them." Albus snuck in.

Minerva looked like she'd just sucked on a bad lemon drop.

"It would appear as if the curse against Defense professors was particularly active this year. I have no doubt that both Harry and Hermione will beg off a similar arrangement come September no matter how successful they were this year."

"We couldn't ask it of them even if we wanted to." Albus's comment gained Minerva's silent approval.

"Next year, I'll personally give Professors... Miss Granger and Mister Potter... private lessons if they will accept them." Minerva took up her quill once again and set to work. She needed to put a few reminders on this summer's calendar. Minerva muttered a few words, but they were too faint for Albus's portrait to overhear.

"What was that, dear Minerva?"

The Headmistress looked up as if caught gossiping. "Well, I was just thinking that it would be wonderful if Harry could come through on his claim to rid of us Voldemort on or before his wedding day. I daresay I would have an easier time of hiring new professors if the war were to end soon."

"A worthy goal to be sure... but a most challenging goal. If only he would listen..."

"Albus, please!" The old Scot called.

The portrait went silent. Albus was a companion and an adviser but no longer was he a leader of men.

* * *

Dead and dying lined the streets of Astrakhan following a path of destruction that hadn't been visited on the city since Luftwaffe bombers hammered the ground below them a half-century ago. And in the middle of it all was a pale monster of a man in a ragged black cloak, yew and phoenix core wand in hand.

"Crucio!" He raged, and the screams of a man caught unawares filled the air.

Terror and destruction was what Voldemort cherished above all things, yet this was no ordinary day for him. He came to his senses with one foot in a shower. Immediately all of his activities of the past weeks came back in a rush and the fires of humiliation and outrage exploded from his core. The... thing... in Voldemort's room was dead even before the Dark Lord remembered to make his misery last and so the Dark Lord's fury needed new targets. No longer did he care about the delicate nature of his journey. No longer did he care about being seen by muggles or being detected by weak I.C.W. officials. What he did care about was the spectacular failure that visiting Jusenkyo truly was. Plans of binding ley lines under Europe to his will as a female avatar of the Earth crumbled to ash as he thought of what he had become.

His cursed form was weak. Emotional. It was vulnerable to all of the human flaws Voldemort took great pains to remove from himself in his youth. His cursed form was submissive. Never had Lord Voldemort known what it was to be submissive. The utter wrongness he felt at being the submissive partner in a relationship... no matter the activities... was revolting to his mind. Lord Voldemort was the Greatest Wizard in the history of the Wizarding World... the most feared Dark Lord in history. Lord Voldemort would never, ever submit to any one in any way. He was destined to rule, not be ruled. And yet, after tempting fate in the worst way possible, _she_ had submitted and done so willingly. Eagerly even. Voldemort could not use that form to become the greatest magical being in existence. He could only vent his anger upon the world.

Out of the corner of his eye, the Dark Lord caught the faintest hint of movement behind a large muggle truck with a long rounded cargo container behind it. Not satisfied by the idea of stalking this prey, he simply thrust an overpowered explosive curse into the vehicle knowing that the foolish man would die in the resulting explosion.

He didn't stop to think that the truck was a milk carrier passing through from a local dairy farm on its way to a bottling plant. Its trailer was full to capacity with fresh cold milk.

_**Boom!**_

Mary wiped the milk soaked bangs from her face and cast a few cleaning and drying charms.

Oopsie.

She was going to have to do something about that. Being so mean and angry all the time was really getting in the way of her quest to win Harry Potter's heart. She needed to get back to England _yesterday_ and she was fresh out of time-turners.

Still... this cloak did look pretty beat up... and it was not the right cut or color for her. Sure, she could transfigure it if she needed to, but that women's boutique on the next block down looked like it had some nice furs in the front window.

And she needed some necklaces and bracelets in the worst way.

And some new shoes.

* * *

The forest floor was dark. This was not due to the time of day but to the heavy canopy above and the unnatural seeming mists which would occasionally drift across rarely used dirt paths.

A pink cardigan sweater caught on a dry branch, snapping the branch free with a sound which seemed far too loud in the wearer's ears.

"HALT!" A voice called from behind her. "Who goes there?"

The ministry witch flinched, one hand curling around her purse and the other moving towards the wand in her pocket.

"I am Dolores Umbridge, duly appointed representative of the Ministry of Magic as required by the Treaty of Seven hundred and forty-three." Dolores turned to meet the man behind her.

There was more than one of them. Chief among them was a man as tall as a half-breed giant, even if he was quite narrow. He wore a long dark cloak and a helm of antlers, and his beady eyes looked down over a wild mane of facial hair. His followers were also cloaked, though they were shorter and their helms were more traditional, Teutonic in styling.

"We are the Knights Who Say... Ni." Their leader answered her.

"Ni!" "Ni." "…ni…" The other knights called afterwards.

Dolores flinched in pain, though she knew not why. These men looked nothing like wizards in her view and not one of them had a wand in hand.

She caught herself growling a bit before regaining control and giving the mustachioed leader a sickly sweet smile. Internally, she was cursing Damien Greengrass's name. As if failing to take the position of Minister for Magic wasn't humiliation enough for her, Minister Greengrass just had to reward Dolores's many years of loyal service by appointing her to a post within the Ministry she'd never even heard of before.

Magical Ambassador to the Knights Who Say Ni, Keepers of the Sacred Words.

The last wizard to hold this post was found wandering the forest not more than a swallow's flight away, wandless and witless, asking anyone he saw if they could direct him to a shrubber. He spent the rest of his life in St. Mungo's. They never did figure out what spell he was hit with. The wizard who held the post before _him_ disappeared after his first day on the job and was never heard from again. Dolores silently swore vengeance on Minister Greengrass and Harry Potter even as she opened her mouth to speak to these horrid man-beasts.

"According to the treaty, your dominion over these lands-"

"Silence!" The leader shouted.

"NI!" "NI!" "Ni." "…ni…" Other knights repeated to Dolores's torment.

"The Nights who say Ni demand… a sacrifice!"

"Ni." "…ni…"

"A what?" Dolores was incredulous.

"If you do not appease us, you shall not leave this wood… alive."

"…ni…"

The toad like woman moved a shaking hand nearer her wand. She already had more of this than she was willing to take.

"Now see here you filthy muggles!"

"NI!" "NI!"

Dolores went for her wand only to drop it as a fresh wave of Sacred Words assaulted her mind. There would be no silencing charm to help her recover.

"NI!" "NI!" "NI!" "NI!"

She fell to her knees on the rough forest path and the Knights Who Say Ni gathered closer 'round their victim. She had refused them, she denied them their due. Doom was upon her.

"NI!" "NI!" "NI!" "NI!" "NI!" "NI!" "NI!"

Dolores would not return to the Ministry building on the morrow. Or the day after. Or the day after that. After a month of silence, the Ambassador's post would be declared open again. It would remain open until another witch or wizard pissed off the Minister so much that the offending party just had to disappear forever.

"Ni." "…ni…" "…ni…" "…ni…"

**Chapter End**

**Chapter Notes: **

**A Question to Reviewers**: As the Lunar Royal wedding's guest list is beyond extravagant, who then should officiate the public ceremony? I don't think the priest from Princess Bride is good enough and Belldandy of Oh!MyGoddess fame might be going too far. Maybe Sasami Jurai could step away from her duties as Flower Girl long enough to turn into her older goddess form – Tsunami? Other suggestions are welcome.

The next chapter may well be the Penultimate Chapter. I'm not 100 percent sure just yet. Sometimes I get extra wordy as you well know. If it is, then there would be only two chapters and an epilogue left after this one is released.


	19. The Penultimate Chapter

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here. Math checked because 1+2+2+1 do not = 7. Other revisions on other stuff too.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Nineteen****: The Penultimate Chapter**

June 20,1997

It was Saturday morning and all testing at Hogwarts was over for the year. Last night was a night for decompression after two weeks of tests and trials. Tradition was upheld. Bottles were emptied in great haste. Vomit was spewed.

The Gryffindor Head of House was called in to control things only an hour after curfew as the younger lions were getting exposed to things that their parents hadn't gotten around to explaining yet. Luckily, the professor in question was already in the room.

Hermione tried to keep things under control. Really, she did. Due to her rigid discipline and stern disposition, the party calmed down for ten whole minutes. Then she was offered a drink. Well, she had a really tough two weeks, right? And it was _just one._ Soon, it was five. Discipline and disposition were well shot in short order.

Once rumors of the party and Hermione's handling of it reached the Headmistresses office, McGonagall would learn why teenaged Heads of House were so rare. Professor Granger needed at least another decade or two of teaching experience before she was given the Head of House position and that's assuming she ever returns to teach. There were those rumors about Hermione and the future King William of course but Minerva didn't remember if any of the muggle monarchy had ever moonlighted as professors before. She didn't think so.

Back in Gryffindor's common room, the Quidditch Cup lay on its side, a small pool of Ogden's Finest spreading away from the cup and staining the floor. Near the ever-lit fireplace, a topless Lav-Lav slept blissfully on her boyfriend's chest, drool dripping down into his ear. Across the room on a love seat, Myrtle slept just as blissfully as Lav-Lav, though she and her cuddle bunny Colin had preserved their modesty. At least nothing that happened last night would appear on anyone's permanent record. Hopefully. As long as certain charms were cast first.

Up in one of the dorm rooms, Ginny opened her eyes.

"Good morning." She said.

"Good morning to you as well." A somewhat nervous looking Neville answered back. "Did we really..."

The young man looked down between them. Ginny did the same. They were on a bed. The covers were all kicked off and as for clothes... well... there weren't any in sight.

Ginny looked back up at her chosen one. "Yeah Nev. We did."

Neville blinked slowly and swallowed. "W-well then. I-I should speak to your father this summer. You know... to make it official. Gran will insist."

Ginny took a deep breath to control herself. Yes, this was exactly what she wanted, but it wasn't quite how she wanted it. Well... okay. She even planned it this way. She built up his courage, she flirted, she made every move first. But just looking into Neville's wide eyes and seeing the trap swing shut was unsettling.

The potion she took all those months ago made Ginny want Neville more than she ever wanted anything- yes, even more than she wanted the Boy-Who-Lived- but it did more than that. It made her love him too. And right now, he didn't look all that happy about being the future Mister Ginny Weasely. Yes, she wanted him, but she wanted him to be happy to be hers.

Ginny took a deep breath and gave his cheek a small peck. "You don't have to do that, Nev. I won't say anything if you don't want me to. I didn't mean to trap you in to anything- I just wanted to be with you. I wanted to do… _that_... with you."

Nev looked a little less panicky but still very unsure.

"Look. Why don't you get cleaned up and have something to eat. We can talk about it after we've both had some time to think it over, yeah?"

The young wizard nodded his assent. Smiling supportively, the redhead sat up, stretched (all sexy like for Nev's benefit) and looked for her things outside of their little love nest. She sneaked a look out through the four-poster's curtains and looked around the dorm room. Her skirt and her knickers were at the foot of the bed, but her top was still missing. A pale smooth foot snaked out to touch the cold stone floor...

_-Thump- _

...only to be pulled back in quickly. A hasty wall of privacy charms was cast by the spooked redhead as a silver haired moon royal pranced into the room. The unexpected visitor stalked past the quiet couple and walked over to a bed which has seen little use for most of the year.

"Good morning!" Usagi's far too happy voice called.

"Hmm?" Hermione's eyes tried to open and failed. "Wha...?"

"I know my Harry makes for a wonderful pillow but I need him clean and presentable soon. Wedding arrangements and stuff, you know. Mom and Dad want to spend the day with him tomorrow and Harry can't look hung over for that." Usagi continued as she bustled about the room. Was she picking up clothing? "And tomorrow is sooner in Japan than it is here, so we don't have all day!"

Hermione still didn't have any response ready. A brain splitting headache may have had something to do with that. She sat up and began to concentrate on being awake. Hermione was scratching an itch under her left breast when she realized that there was no cotton between finger and itch. She forced her eyes to open and look down at the same time.

"This..." A minor surge of panic allowed her to appear alert for a moment. "This isn't what it looks like?"

Usagi pulled her hand picked pile of clothes tight to her stomach and turned to the brunette, a neutral expression on her face. "So you are not naked on my naked husband in his old bed in the boys' dormitory?"

"I... I am?" She squeaked.

Hermione wasn't sure herself if it was an answer or a question. Her stomach was feeling queasy and it wasn't entirely due to the conversation either. How much did she drink last night anyway? Hermione tried to remember being both awake and naked last night. She couldn't. Oh, Merlin, what had she been doing?

Much to the witch's surprise, the silver haired crown princess of magical girls began smiling again. "You are not in trouble, 'Mione. Dobby brought you two up here after a late night game of strip exploding snap ended in tie and everyone pass out, so no sexy time for you."

Usagi took a minute to poke Harry's face, proving that he's still out cold. She dropped the pile of soiled clothes on his chest and leaned in a little closer to Hermione.

She spoke in a lower tone. "Harry told me you are planning his bachelor party. Of course. (-snort-) Like anyone would trust Ron to organize something important like that... I know he will be best man in the ceremony, but that's only because he has the right plumbing for it. You, Hermione, are Harry's true best mate." She paused for a moment. "This means you get to pick who jumps out of cake, yes?"

Usagi winked at Hermione. Hermione, for her part, stayed just interested enough in the conversation to not throw up before the Tokyo native got to her point.

"I hear rumor that Luna wants to jump out of Harry's cake... Makoto too. For Minako, it's no rumor; she really, really wants to do it. Badly. But... maybe you take that honor yourself?"

Hermione's eyes went wide at the implication. "B-but I couldn't do _that_ in front of all those men! I'm not one of _those girls_."

"I didn't say you were." Usagi countered, brushing aside the implication that the other girls mentioned might be some of '_those girls_'. "Be smart. Be brave Gryffindor. Be a sneaky Slytherin if you want to. Use polyjuice or the Lunar Pen or something."

"But why are you offering me your husband? _ Again?_" Hermione asked.

"Because to me, making love to someone you love is far better than having sex with someone you'll never see again." Usagi answered.

Hermione blushed at the implications and smiled. The witch didn't need to ask Usagi who she would wake up next to the morning after her bachelorette party. A certain shrine priestess was the sure bet. Unfortunately, something came up and Hermione lost her smile. And then her face turned white.

Usagi had to dodge out of the way as Hermione threw up like a pro. Distance _and_ volume. Was that corn? When did she eat corn?

"Dobby?" Usagi asked while pinching her nose shut.

pop

"Dobby is here for the Lady Potter Ma'am!" The excitable elf squeaked.

Usagi waved her hand at the pool of sick on the floor. "A little help, please?"

Dobby began waving his hand to banish the mess even as he responded. "Right away, Lady Potter Ma'am! Shall I get some potions and water for Missy Mione too."

Usagi nodded quickly. "Yes, thank you Dobby. You really are a lifesaver."

As the ever helpful house elf pop'd away to get some water, Usagi picked a bra up off the top of the clothes pile on Mount Harry.

"Not that one... mine was white." Hermione pushed it away.

Suddenly, both teen magicals stopped and looked at the bra in question. It _wasn't_ Hermione's. It was familiar to Hermione... as if she'd picked that very bra up off of a floor before... but not at Hogwarts.

Hermione quickly scanned the room. Seamus wasn't in the room, nor was Ron. Dean was as dead to the world as Harry was and Neville was...

...Neville was behind privacy wards.

Hermione rolled off the other side of Harry's bed to hide her indecency. "Ginny?"

Neville's curtains moved and shook for a moment before they started making sound again. A big ball of untamed red hair spilled out of a break in the fabric.

"Yes?"

Hermione boggled. Usagi cursed.

"You're not going to tell anyone are you?" Ginny pleaded with big innoc- well, not innocent eyes, but with all the cuteness that she could muster.

"Shimatta!" The crown princess kicked at a nearby chair. "If you two had just waited until after the train ride home, I'd have won the pool!"

Ginny turned to Hermione. "There was a pool on when I'd sleep with Neville?"

"We won't tell anyone if you don't want us to Ginny." The blood-shot eyed Head of House nodded while hastily getting dressed. "I had money on you two openly snogging on the train, but going no further until after Harry's wedding."

"Hmmm... maybe I could arrange that." Ginny mused for a moment before putting it out of her mind and settling on a new happy thought for the day. "Oh, Professor Granger!" She shouted.

"What?" Hermione replied with a bit of snark. She didn't feel very professor-ish at the moment, not with the hang over and the being caught starkers in a student's dorm and all of that.

"I really have to thank you." The fiery witch replied with new energy. "This is the first time I've seen a Hogwarts Head of House starkers and I am quite thankful that it was you and not Professor McGonagall."

There was a snort as Neville tried to suppress his laughter behind Ginny. Usagi tittered. For her part, Hermione continued to get dressed and ignore her supposedly good friend.

* * *

"_Do you recognize where we are, Harry?" _Sailor Pluto asked the young wizard next to her.

"_Yeah." _

He didn't need to look around; the entire path up here was familiar. Harry pointed to a magical tapestry on one wall. _ "That's a particularly daft wizard named Barnabas the Barmy trying to teach some trolls ballet…"_ He spun around to the opposite wall face and gestured to it grandly. _"…and that empty wall is the secret location of the Room of Requirement. It's where our first year of D.A. meetings were held."_

As the small group of magical girls around him looked at the empty wall, Mercury began to scan the wall face. Moon and Chibi-Moon both turned back to the painting. A foolish wizard teaching trolls to dance was Funny with a capital F. Silly trolls.

"_Tom Riddle's signal is stronger… but I still can't get a clear fix. I can see an energy field representing what must be the door, but I can't seem to pin down the trigger. How do we get in?"_ Mercury asked, never taking her eyes off of the Mercury Computer or it's readings.

"It's actually quite simple as long as you know what you want beforehand. I've heard of a few people using the room accidentally without knowing what it really was." Harry began pacing in front of the wall. After his third pass a door appeared. _ "This, for example, is the very room we used to practice defense for the D.A."_

Harry opened the door and held it open for his guests.

"_Oooooh… I like this room! It's big." _ Chibi-Moon called. She shouted in order to hear her own voice echo back. It did.

"_It's much prettier than the Chamber of Secrets." _Moon added, spinning to look from wall to wall and taking it all in.

"_But the horcrux is not in here. Not in __**this**__ version of the room, but it is very close by. If we could just isolate the correct room..." _ Mercury stated. She then turned her scans back to the door in. _ "Do we have to go back through the door to reset the room?"_

Harry replied. _ "Honestly, I don't know for sure. I think we do."_

"_The door is a magical or dimensional gate of some sort."_ Gloved hands blurred over the small magically powered computer as Mercury milked her data for all it was worth. _ "Actually, the whole room is. We have to reset the dimensional gate to the proper key- but, how do we figure out the right key?"_

"_If you would all please return to the hall, I will try to summon the right room."_ Harry offered.

After a quick round of nods, the group returned the the hall. Harry closed the door and dismissed the room they were just in.

"_So, what do we summon? Would there even be a 'horcrux room'?" _ Moon asked.

"_Probably not." _ Harry shook his head. _"But it can't hurt to try."_

The teenaged professor of defense walked back and forth in front of Barnabas the Barmy (who was still making the two Moons giggle) three times. No door appeared.

"Drat." Harry bit back a stronger curse as he didn't want his daughter to hear anything too vulgar.

Then he tried again. No door. He tried again. There was a door this time, but no horcrux on the other side. And Again. No door this time. Or the next. He went through at least a dozen different ideas of his own before taking ideas from the crowd of mahou shoujo around him. Nothing with Tom's name, be it his real name or his aliases, was responding. Rooms came up with information on horcruxes in book or memory format, but no soul shards turned up.

Harry was getting frustrated. "Damn."

"Language!" Moon scolded as she tried to cover Chibi-Moon's ears. A little late there, Princess. Chibi-Moon giggled.

Harry began pacing in tight circles in the middle of the hall. "If only there were a room full of lost or hidden things then-"

"Harry!" Usagi yelled.

"What?" He yelled back, startled.

"_It would appear that there is a room for 'lost or hidden things'."_ Pluto commented wryly while looking behind him.

He turned around.

A door. Holy shit, it worked. Harry opened the door.

"_Well?" _ An impatient Moon asked her close friend.

"_I think this is the one." _ Mercury commented as she went over the readings. _ "We should to go inside and look around."_

Pluto went in first, then Mercury, Moon, Chibi-Moon and finally Harry. This room was big just like the D.A. room was, but it had massive piles of random crap on the floor. It was like a trash dump for magical cast-offs.

"_What is all this stuff?"_ Chibi-Moon asked while walking up to one of the piles.

She grabbed an old student robe and pulled it free. The robe had some fine lacework in Hufflepuff colors, but it was too big for her... and it was covered in dust and spiderwebs. Sneezing, the tiny pink haired Senshi dropped the robe and began kicking it back to the edge of the junk pile.

"_The soul fragment is that way..." _ Mercury called pointing her hand off to the left. _"Forty meters at two nine eight degrees."_

Unfortunately, there was no straight path. It took four rights and seven lefts plus a bit of extra walking, but eventually the group was in a semi-circle looking at an old stone bust with a tarnished yet still attractive tiara sitting atop the head. A large blue gem took up the center of the piece and jewel encrusted wings spread to either side.

"_That's what we are looking for. The tiara is highly magical... not all of it matches Tom Riddle's pattern, but I'm certain that what isn't old spellwork is a genuine soul shard." _ Mercury concluded.

"_How certain?"_ Harry asked.

Mercury looked at Pluto. The elder Senshi nodded her assent.

"_Three days ago," _ the blue haired Senshi lectured, _"we ran down two different instances of Tom Riddle's energy which both appeared to originate in London. One was easy to get to. It was in your house."_

"_What, in Grimmauld Place?" _Harry asked.

"_Yes." _ Mercury confirmed. _"We asked Kreacher to help us find the soul shard. It was actually on display hidden amongst some other enchanted objects that I'm really going to want to study some day... but the soul shard was a locket. It was a rather heavy locket with the letter 'S' prominently displayed. Kreacher informed us that his former master Regulus stole the locket from Mister Riddle and that is why the man was murdered. That one had less background magic than this piece, but the taint of Tom Riddle's power was identical."_

"_Wow." _Harry thought of all the time that he and his friends had already spent in that house. If every horcrux were as easy to use-_ misuse_- as the Diary was, then it was a bloody miracle that none of the Weasleys ever died to resurrect a Dark Lord. Surely even handling it would have tainted the soul. _ "So what happened to the locket?"_

"_I kicked it's ass."_ Moon called proudly from Harry's right. _"Just pump enough Moon power through a dark artifact and you clean it right up! I'll wear it for you tomorrow if you want..."_

"_And you'll be wearing a 'new' tiara to dinner tonight, Love."_ Harry shot back. _"So... shall we?"_

Everyone took a few steps back. Moon drew her Kaleidomoon Scope and then Chibi-Moon drew her own slightly smaller scepter much to Harry's confusion.

"When did you get a Scepter of Prissiness, Cuteness?" He asked his daughter.

She pulled down her eyelid and stuck her tongue out. "I've had this thing for a while, Daddy. I'm a Senshi _in training_, remember?"

Moon swatted her little girl on the back of the head.

"Ow!" The smallest Senshi put a hand on her new booboo and turned her angry face to Momma.

"_Kids these days... no respect, I swear." _Usagi muttered.

It was Moon's turn to receive the dreaded Cuteness Raspberry Attack.

Pluto maintained her calm, but inside she was cursing Serenity the First for making this all her responsibility. She held the bridge of her nose for a moment to dispel the coming headache before taking action.

"_Please, Your Highness. We have a dark object to cleanse. The two of you can bond over some ice cream later."_

Ice cream! Both Lunar Senshi stopped mid pissing-match to drool at their future prize. One of purpose, they both centered themselves and pointed their magic sparkly sticks at the tiara.

"MOON GORGEOUS MEDITATION!" Both Moon Senshi called together as they thrust their weapons forward.

A bright flare of Lunar white magic flooded the room for several seconds. Harry and the girls thought they could hear a faint scream of pain filled terror in the heat of it, but that didn't bother anyone present. Even monsters scream when they die. When the fireworks were over, Mercury scanned the tiara and it's immediate surroundings.

"_We're clear. The tiara is still enchanted, but Tom Riddle's power is completely gone. The original enchantments are still in place as they were not dark in nature." _ The Mercury Computer was pushed from side to side and around in a circle. _ "In fact... I'm reading a new concentration of Lunar magic in the central gem."_

The assembled Senshi and Harry all walked up to the tiara to get a closer look. It was cleaner looking... more sparkly... and the big blue gem in the middle was glowing faintly.

"Dibs!" Moon yelled.

"Hey! No fair!" Chibi-Moon shot back. _"You have lots of tiaras and I only have the magic uniform one plus the one Daddy gave me."_

"_I'll leave it to you in my will, Spore." _ Moon chirped, picking the tiara up and spinning it over to look at the reverse side.

"_Whatever. Like I'm going to wait for you to die. I'll just grow up and get some boobies and **one day** boys will be throwing tiaras at me. You'll see!"_

Harry did _not_ need to hear that. That's the problem with being surrounded by mahou shoujo: None of them can cast Obliviate. Where's the DMLE when you need them?

It was time for a distraction.

"_What was that other Riddle energy instance in London, then? You said there were two of them." _ Harry said to Mercury who had moved on to scanning the room in depth.

"_Good news and bad news on that one." _ Pluto interrupted before Mercury could respond. _"The bad news is that we tracked that soul shard to the doors of Gringotts Bank. We think it's in a vault."_

Harry frowned. He knew well how important security and privacy were to the goblins.

"_The good news is that we might have a way to deal with the problem that the Goblins will accept." _Pluto said.

And that right there reminded Harry how awesome Sailor Hotness was. Bedding Usagi several nights a week for months may have pulled the teeth out of Harry's old crush, but it would never completely go away. Hotness was just too damn hot.

She continued. _ "There are two ways we can get what we want. First, we can take Death Eaters to court. They and their master have made direct attacks on our sovereign on multiple occasions and therefore we can legally demand compensation from known combatants and their direct supporters."_

"_Like Malfoy?" _Harry asked. _"That makes sense. He was one of Tom's closest supporters. He clearly had possession of one horcrux and must have understood what it was capable of when he slipped it in Ginny's cauldron."_

Pluto replied. _"I doubt that Tom Riddle would have given Malfoy more than one of his soul shards, but there were other Death Eaters that he trusted as much or more than Malfoy."_

"_Lestrange."_ Harry almost growled.

"_It's possible."_ Pluto allowed. _"There were a few others in his inner circle. Luckily for us, that circle is well known __**and**__ it's shrinking. Rabastan Lestrange died last week and Rodolphous is back in Ministry custody. With Lord Greengrass's help, we can have hearings against the Lestrange family pushed through the courts quickly and cleanly."_

"_The family? I thought you were just going after some vaults to get at a horcrux."_ Harry asked.

"_We are looking for the horcrux, that's true... but this is a move that we would have considered making anyway. Economic warfare, Harry. One day you and your loving wife will need to understand how to properly wage war with money. If you can take your enemy's money and property away from them, then they won't be able to fund their war and they will lack bases to attack from. At the same time, you will have more gold to spend and more territory to draw resources from." _

Was this Professor Pluto? She might be showing up more in the future as Harry and Usagi still had a lot to learn from the immortal court adviser. _War Economics with Professor Hotness_, now that was a class Harry could get into.

"_All their bases will belong to us? Are we talking about the spoils of war?"_ He asked.

"_We won't be able to get all of their properties. I expect there are plenty of secret hideouts for the remaining Death Eaters to run to, but we can try to legally take any property that shows up in public record. Old family mansions and summer homes come to mind. Land and lots of it. When this war is over, our Crown Princess... and her husband... will no doubt be influential landowners in Magical Britain."_

"_You mean 'even more influential' don't you?" Harry mumbled. "And here all I wanted to do this summer was get married and beat a Dark Lord. I must have too much free time on my hands."_

"_Daddy?" _ Chibi-Moon called to her father with as much bubblegum cuteness as she could muster. If Harry squinted just right, he could see a halo wavering over her pink locks. _ "If you get all the bad guy stuff, can I have their ponies?"_

Harry remembered Hotness saying something about two ways to do it. _"Pluto, the other way...?"_

She smiled a very cold, heartless and bitchy smile. _"Kill them and then take all their stuff. It's a bit less pleasant an option, but a good barrister can keep the courts tied up for years. Killing is faster."_

Moon wouldn't look at Pluto the same for weeks.

When Harry and Usagi did make an appearance in the Great Hall at dinner, she wore the tiara as planned. The stares that both the Chosen One and Luna's Daughter received were far out of proportion to what the two expected. Ravenclaw House's table seemed to have a plague of the crazies until Head Girl Chang calmed them down by walking over to the Lord and Lady Potter and asking about her diadem. Apparently it's a mythical possession of a founder. Lady Rowena Ravenclaw herself. It's the Holy Grail of the house of ravens due to being missing for a thousand years. Ahhhh. That explains the massive reaction well enough.

That night, every Ravenclaw witch in the castle was allowed to wear the diadem in turn, but Usagi took it back in the end. It accepted her Lunar magic and she wasn't about to let her new shiny thing escape. It matched her eyes and everything!

The next night, when Usagi returned to dine at Hogwarts wearing the diadem _**and**_ the locket, she had two houses drooling over her all night long. Another founder's treasure, they said. Sure, why not. Maybe Harry should carry the Sword of Gryffindor out in the open more often.

If only they could find something of Helga's...

They couldn't be that lucky, could they?

* * *

Meanwhile, in northern Italy, Dark Lord Voldemort was killing people.

He wouldn't say it made him happy because, to be honest, nothing did. Even if Harry Potter were to be presented to his Dark Lordiness this very instant, trussed up and begging forgiveness, it wouldn't help. At best, he would be 'not quite so mind numbingly angry'. No, killing people would not get this dark wizard out of his dark funk.

That didn't mean he wouldn't try.

The common street thugs he followed back to their warehouse hideout thought they were going to have a nice night of drinking, thieving and raping to look forward too. He disabused them of that notion by flexing his magical muscle and destroying the old warehouse's electrical system. The drunken would-be criminals all shouted in confusion and anger. Sunlight didn't reach this far into the interior of the building, so Voldemort's attack may have well have been at midnight as far as these young men were concerned. They couldn't see a thing until Voldemort gave them a little help.

He began casting spells.

Oh, sure. The magical light was welcome to the muggles for all of a half second as destructive bolts raced from wand to target. After that, they weren't too happy about the light Voldemort chose to provide. They raised their voices in complaint. Well, screeched in pain may have been a better term.

After spending several hours taking his frustrations out on the helpless muggles, Voldemort was... well... not better, but perhaps less angry would do. As a parting gift to the one or two men still alive, he cast one final spell.

Fiendfyre.

Of course, maybe he should have waited until he was outside of the warehouse before shooting off that one. The electrical system was dead but the fire suppression system worked just fine. After only a few seconds of flaming havoc, row upon row of metal sprinkler heads burst into action spraying the entire building. While the magical fires cared not for mere muggle water, Voldemort noted with some indignation that his Imperturbable charm recently wore off and that he was caught in the open.

Or he would have noted it, had _he _not been replaced by _she_.

Mary Riddle hurriedly performed a series of rapid apparations and mixed a few portkeys into the pattern for the hell of it. Some countries' aurors were better than others but almost all of them would respond to a Fiendfyre casting in a muggle neighborhood. Eventually. She was really beginning to not like her other self. Granted, her mere existence as a female him was clearly one of his biggest reasons to get all stabby recently but still, he really needed to get laid.

And so did she.

_Oh Harry._

* * *

July 2nd, 1997

Hermione and Juliet walked into the Great Hall side by side. They were a bit early, but then they were the Granger girls and this was to be expected.

The Leaving Feast would begin soon and the hall was decorated in the colors of Ravenclaw. Why not Gryffindor, you ask? Without the constant battle between lions and snakes, the ever studious ravens soaked up house points like a sponge. Were it not for Quidditch, even Hufflepuff would have beat Gryffindor at the end of the year. As it was, Harry and Hermione's house was in second place at the end of the year and Slytherin was last. A snakehouse wide desire to lay low and finish the year without disturbing the peace may have had something to do with it. Survival was a cornerstone to both cunning and ambition, was it not? Hermione took a moment to mourn her loss to Ravenclaw (being Head of House she felt responsible for her houses performance) before turning to one of the bright points of the year. Her sister.

"So... friends in all four houses?" The elder Granger asked.

The younger witch nodded eagerly. She was quite proud of her new found ability to be popular.

"Yes. I must say that the Slytherins are by far the most interesting girls. It's ever so much fun trying to discover what they're really after when they make deals. I expect those girls to be much better at chess on average than a Gryffie or a Puff." Juliet turned from her sister to the empty table. "A glass of cold cow's milk, please..."

A simple glass of milk appeared on the table. Hermione looked at her sister expectantly.

"House elves. You did know that they can tell what's happening in the Great Hall from the kitchens and they can hear everything we say?" Juliet asked. "And you really must specify cow's milk. I learn from my mistakes."

Hermione nodded. Really, she had a vague sense of her sister's assertions before but she was not about to admit to knowing less about the magical world than her younger sister. Not on any subject.

"I still owe Harry a thesis on house elf slavery..." Hermione said quietly.

"Really?" Juliet looked intrigued. Hermione admitting to be overdue on an assignment was big. "Well then you simply must speak to Annabelle and Christine." At her sister's inquiring look, Juliet continued. "When I first learned that magical slaves were working in Hogwarts, I was livid- but then they set me straight. I mean... think of it... …a whole race of magical beings that can't use magic unless they borrow it from someone or somewhere else. It would be like me asking a centaur if I might kindly be permitted to read tea leaves- or to ask some fairies if I might be permitted to fly on a broom."

Hermione kept nodding encouragingly. Her sister clearly had better grasp on the subject than she did. This was unacceptable. As soon as Harry was squared away this summer, she was doing some deep research.

"Of course." Hermione needed to change the subject and fast. "Are you ready for this summer?"

"Oh yes!" Juliet's eyes lit up. "Private studies with the Headmistress herself! I can't wait!"

"And there is the little matter of Harry's wedding in Tokyo. July thirty-first. And you've also been invited to the Tonks-Lupin wedding two weeks later and then the Delacour-Weasley wedding on the twenty-third." Hermione knew that Headmistress McGonagall would also be attending both weddings, so Juliet should not have any schedule conflicts.

"Who would have guessed? My sister, the social butterfly?" Juliet teased.

"She can't help it after rooming with me for years!" Lavender dropped into the seat one down from Juliet, a bright smile on her face. "I'm so proud of her! Of course, it was a tough battle up until recently- you really should have seen what she wore outside of the castle on most days- but _you_, dear! Those snakes are giving you excellent fashion advice, I simply must say."

Hermione began to twitch but Juliet was beaming. Rare was the day a fashion obsessed gossip would complement one of the Granger girls. More to the point, Juliet had someone to lean on if her sister tried to ask too many questions about her new circle of witch friends. A circle in which Lavender was interim Head Priestess until the next school year began. Lav-Lav would help Juliet; after all, what happens in the Harry Potter is Dreamy Fan Club stays in the Harry Potter is Dreamy Fan Club; and the club goes to great lengths to keep Hermione Granger in the dark. What Hermione knows Harry knows, and no one wanted Harry to know.

At least the Great Ginger Traitor could be counted on to stay silent. Longbottom indeed! Heresy!

The young witches settled down into some easy gossip as they watched the hall fill. Harry came in with Usagi on his arm and Jupiter on escort duty. Seamus immediately stood and began chatting up the Senshi of lightning. As she was wearing Harry's translation ring today, she actually understood what he was saying and could keep a low grade flirt going while looking out for her charge.

The feast was delicious, as expected. All of Hogwarts' traditional dishes were served as well as a small selection of traditional and modern Japanese dishes. There had been a lot of interest in sushi one day after Harry asked Dobby to learn the proper techniques. The elf was practically an Iron Chef now. Seriously skilled, that one.

All too soon, the main dishes were done with and it was time for Minerva to stand and make her end of year announcements.

"We find ourselves at the end of a most turbulent year here at Hogwarts." She started. The room went quiet. "Noble and wonderful wizards and witches died this year and Headmaster Albus Dumbledore was but one among many. Please join me in a moment of silence for the recently departed."

Minerva lowered her head and many followed her lead. The hall was dead silent for more than a minute. For school aged children, this was a minor miracle, but it could happen in the right circumstances.

"Thank you." She raised her head. "But the school year isn't about death. It is about life... and learning. It's about becoming a better person and growing up to take your place in the world outside of Hogwarts' gates. This year, the world is quite a bit bigger than it seemed to be only just last year as the wizarding world is now closer to the muggle world than it has been in centuries. In my youth, I never expected to be alive when the magical and non-magical worlds came together to heal the wounds of our forefathers. It seems we may witness that joining- and sooner rather than later if Crown Princess Usagi Serenity and Lord Harry Potter have any say in the matter."

There was applause, but it was tempered. Harry and Usagi had been campaigning in their rare off time for better understanding between the pureblood magicals and their muggleborn classmates. There was progress, but it was slow. People still feared that which they did not understand. Luckily Usagi had an idea, a not-so-secret weapon of the non-magical world which was tailor made to help purebloods fit in. How? In this place, the normal boundaries of muggle society were intentionally stretched and magic was taken for granted.

Minerva continued. "I'd like to remind all of you that anyone who wishes to head not to Hogsmeade Station but to Japan via portkey, you may still sign up for Lord Potter's trip to Tokyo by showing Professor Granger a permission slip signed by your guardian. She will officially accept them until curfew tonight. I am told that Lord Potter will pay all expenses for the week of the trip, including a modest stipend for the purchase of muggle souvenirs."

There was a loud cheer. All of the D.A. members had signed on for the trip as well as most of the muggleborn students. Even for those students who grew up in the muggle world, none of them outside of Harry and his close friends had ever been to Japan and only a few had ever been to any Disney park at all. Harry had also pulled in some outside help. The twins were going, as were Bill, Fleur, Moony and Tonks. Andromeda Tonks and Melian Greengrass were attending as chaperones, and wherever Melian went little Lulu was sure to follow. Lulu was excited. She'd get to meet Cuteness and Sasami again. Maybe she could have another magical girl lesson!

"Now, before I send you all to your beds for the evening, and for the upper year students I do mean _**your**_beds," The Headmistress's half-joke drew a round of laughter. "I have one last announcement to make. While it is too early to know how any of our students performed on their O.W.L.'s and N.E.W.T.'s, we do have the results for many regular classes."

Minerva cleared her throat in a move that everyone suspected as merely drawing out tension. The bitch.

"While all core subjects showed some improvement this year, one class in particular has seen instruction and test results unheard of since before Grindewald's time. I am of course talking about Defense Against the Dark Arts-"

Minerva had to stop due to the great cry of excitement filling the hall. Down at Gryffindor Table, Harry and Hermione were both flush in embarrassment. The Headmistress held up her hands in a gesture to get the students to calm down. It worked just enough for her to continue.

"While part of that success is due to efforts by the late Headmaster Dumbledore and also due to Professor Snape, this year could very well have ended in scholastic tragedy had not two of your own peers set aside their personal needs and answered the call. Due to the efforts of Professors Potter and Granger we have seen a one to two letter grade improvement in all seven years and all four houses..." The roar of the student body once again drowned out what Headmistress McGonagall had to say for a few moments. "...I daresay the wizard or witch that ends up teaching Defense next year shall have very large shoes to fill."

Harry leaned over to his very embarrassed friend and added. "You're shoes are a very sensible of course... and you have pretty feet- now if she want's to say that I have giant feet then I'm fine with that."

Hermione popped him one on the shoulder.

"And with those final words, I say goodnight- or if I do not see you tomorrow morning, have a pleasant summer!"

There was one last swell of applause as Headmistress McGonagall rose from her chair and left the hall. Many of the students also took it as their cue to leave though not all moved at once. Eventually even the last lurkers left the Great Hall and the castle went silent. Some couples had their final broom closet snogs and others had their last secret classroom shags. This may or may not have included members of the staff, though the truth may never be revealed in most cases.

Except for one.

Professor Potter stood at the entrance to his professorial bedchamber and gazed silently at the sight before him. It was too beautiful to speak of. His lover, his fiancee, his wife was crawling on all fours to the middle of the bed. Oh, yeah... she was starkers again.

She turned and looked at him over one shoulder. It was that look. 'Take me' it said. That would never get old. Never ever ever.

* * *

Around mid-afternoon, park security was increased. Ordinarily one rarely saw members of the park security staff. At least, one didn't unless the big parade was about to start, but even now a dozen park employees were politely staking out the central square. Was there a problem? People were beginning to wonder.

Things got a little more exciting when two women appeared out of thin air. Two women who were in distinctive outfits. Distinctive outfits which were most certainly not standard park employee uniforms.

"Would you like a drink? I can get you something." The Senshi of Pluto asked her companion after a few quiet minutes.

"Just a tic, luv." Came the reply. "It won't take nearly as long as that."

The pink haired witch in full English Auror uniform gave her wand a few more waves until a string of numbers appeared to hover in mid-air before her. Several onlookers gasped in shock at the demonstration of real live magic.

"That's the stuff. Got it!" Nymphadora Tonks crowed in triumph.

"Excellent. Please place your hand on the staff." Pluto said. Before leaving, Pluto called back to the park employees,_ "Half an hour! We'll be back in half an hour!"_

And without even a pop or whisper, they were gone.

"_Oh my! Did you see that?" _ One woman said to her husband as their little girl shouted for joy at seeing a real mahou shoujo. _"I didn't expect to see a Senshi __**here**__. Do you think there are any monsters nearby?"_

Her husband could only guess not. No alarms were being raised. One park official was calling back to his superiors, but they weren't trying to evacuate or anything.

Just over nine thousand kilometers away, at the foot of the gates of Hogwarts Castle, both magical women reappeared.

"Auror Tonks." Minister Greengrass strolled up to the young woman. "How did your mission go?"

There was a fair gathering of DMLE employees and Ministry officials standing in a couple of loose groups around the gates. There was also a small collection of other interested individuals. They were the non-Hogwarts magicals which had signed on to go to Japan.

Tonks gave her superior a slight bow before replying. "Worked like a charm, Sir. We've got proper portkey coordinates to the destination. One hop is all it'll take now."

"Excellent work, Auror." Damien replied. "Please arrange for seven mass transit portkeys to be created."

Tonks nodded theatrically, then walked over to a group of fellow aurors to begin fashioning portkeys. With help, this wouldn't take long at all.

Tonks was watching the last portkey get charmed as the first Hogwarts student walked by. That one passed through the crowd of government officials and continued on to the rail station beyond. Only a few minutes later Harry Potter arrived at the head of a column of students that were all going to Japan.

"Harry!" Damien called.

"Sir." Harry smiled and shook the Minister's hand.

As the two men stepped apart, Melian moved in front of her husband and gave Harry a warm hug. Surprised and blushing, Harry was in no way prepared for the little blonde missile that latched her arms around his waist and hugged for all she was worth.

"I missed you too, Lulu." He laughed and kissed the little girl's head. She blushed heavily and ran behind her mother.

As Harry was being teased by Ginny and Luna for playing with a young lady's heart, a second little girl took a flying leap at the Chosen One.

"'arry! 'arry!" The petite mademoiselle shouted into his chest. She was about the same size as Lulu if the platinum-blonde cloud of hair was anything to go by. "Te souviens-tu de moi?"

He was stuck. Stuck until she looked up into his eyes. He remembered her now. "Gabrielle?"

To see her face light up was to see the sun rise in the morning, the glow was that special. _He remembered!_

"Careful, 'arry." Fleur chuckled as she walked up behind the two. "My sister can talk of nozzing ozzer zan spending time wiz you zis summer. I zink she is sweet on you. Zey call it 'puppy love', no?"

"Does she speak English?" Harry said, still looking Gabrielle in the eyes. She didn't even flinch. She also didn't let go of Harry.

"Non. But she does 'ave ze Pacific Rim earrings on, you see?" Fleur pulled some of her sister's hair back, pointing to the jade hoop earrings that were turning out to be quite popular today.

When Harry saw that both Fleur and Gabrielle were wearing matching jade earrings, he changed tactics. Harry dropped onto his knees so he would be at the same level as the little girl in front of him. This also had the effect of making their faces much closer. His next words were in Japanese.

"_It's so very nice to see you again, Gabrielle! I quite forgot how adorably beautiful you are! Are you coming to my wedding in Tokyo? Please say you will, I need pretty girls like you to be flower girls in my ceremony."_

The little Veela blushed so hard her face nearly exploded. Fleur put a hand on her sister's shoulder to keep the little angel from dropping in a dead faint.

"_I think that means 'yes' you charmer." _ Fleur teased.

"If I can have your attention please!" A call came from off to the side.

Pluto.

"To everyone coming to Japan with Lord Potter! Your names have already been collected and documentation will be handed out to each and every one of you after you reach your destination. For now, will you all form up in seven rings around my position?" The Senshi called loudly.

"It's a pity that Ranma and Shampoo won't be coming with us." Harry mentioned as he walked by Pluto.

"Don't worry, Harry. They've got their own activities planned." Pluto returned.

"Do I even want to know?" Harry teased, thinking of how often the two martial artists were caught by Prefects in broom cupboards. Just catching those two was usually enough of an object lesson to up the bedroom skills of any Prefect that saw them in the act.

"Option number two for 'stuff acquisition'." Pluto returned.

Crap. He really didn't want to know after all.

Seven aurors walked over to Pluto, each with a long rope in hand. The crowd began to break apart and congregate around different aurors. Harry and his Inner Circle of Coolness formed one group. The DA formed two more. Three more rings were formed by random students which had gotten the necessary permission, and the last group was the chaperone/little girl group.

After a few minutes of moving and positioning, all seven groups were properly situated. Pluto was satisfied with their spacing and Tonks was satisfied with their numbers. The aurors not named Tonks all left the group and stepped clear. Tonks nodded at Pluto. Pluto nodded back.

"After I leave, you will have exactly three minutes before the portkeys trigger. Do not move. Make sure you are touching the portkey with direct skin contact. Thank you, and see you in Tokyo!" With a final bow, Sailor Pluto disappeared.

Words were exchanged. Itches were scratched. No, Lulu, you can't go pee now. You'll just have to wait until we get there.

All of a sudden, their three minutes were up and every man, woman and child felt a pull behind their navels.

Back in Japan, crowds were getting heavier. News had spread.

The target square was empty, but a heavy ring of spectators had come close to see... well... they didn't know what- but whatever it was clearly outclassed all of the Disney princesses combined. How could they tell? Because Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Belle, Ariel and Jasmine were all waiting at the side of the empty square just like everyone else. They wouldn't have to wait long. Exactly one half-hour after Sailor Pluto said she would return, she did.

A huge prismatic shaft of light came down from on high: a Sailor Teleport. But that wasn't all; just outside of the ring of magical girls was seven equally spaced rings of English magicals all holding tightly to their portkey ropes. Both forms of magical travel ended at the exact same time. Pluto was a real pro with a flare for the dramatic. Being immortal will do that.

"Welcome to Tokyo Disney Land!" Pluto shouted so that all the newcomers could hear.

Applause from Japanese tourists was outstanding.

Near the center of the magical influx, one Sailor Moon held onto her miniature trainee's hand a second longer than she usually would have.

"_Remember! Ix-nay on the Ommy-may and the Addy-day. Okay-way?"_ Moon hissed. (1)

Chibi-Moon rolled her eyes and jumped out of per place in line. She had a Daddy to tackle and she didn't care how many people saw. Then Lulu saw her good friend Cuteness jumping on Harry had to go over and say hi. Gabrielle saw Lulu run over to a girl their age and followed immediately. Much high pitched giggling and bubbly introduction ensued.

Harry looked between the petite pretties immediately in front of him and the amused mahou shoujo, wizards and witches in a slightly wider circle. Just outside of that circle, a group of actresses pretending to be fairytale royalty were trying to decide if they should stay in character and interact with real witches and a real magical princess or if they should fan-girl out and beg for autographs. Maybe the threat of being fired for breaking character helped as they all took the high road in the end.

Harry was in heaven. Now if only he could get a hold of that other one... what was her name? Sammy? Sasami? Yeah, that's it. Maybe Pluto would know how to get a hold of his fourth flower girl.

* * *

A smartly dressed young black haired beauty reclined in the shade, watching as waves of humanity crested and receded. Mary Riddle watched the Hogwarts Express empty at King's Cross Station and yet she did nothing. She sat with a coffee in one hand and a copy of the Daily Prophet in the other, less than pleased but determined not to let the locals know.

Harry Potter didn't get off the train. She watched each and every student who took the train disembark and meet their parents. Strangely, the crowd was much smaller than she expected it to be and several key families like the Weaselys didn't even make an appearance.

Of course, now she knew why. The Prophet had it all spelled out from half a dozen different angles. He followed his Moon Whore to Japan straight from Hogwarts, him and their six dozen closest friends. Drat. He probably wouldn't be coming back before the wedding. And if he did, how could she tell where he would go and who he would visit?

Mary set down her coffee and turned the page. The few families who had yet to leave the platform all turned in surprise upon hearing Mary's angry scream.

"Somethin' wrong, miss?"

An auror walked up to her. The platform may be nearly empty but the Ministry wasn't taking any chances this time. Security would remain until the last passenger was home. Not seeing any signs of dark lords or any other criminal activity, the wizard looked at the Daily Prophet article that seems to have ruffled her feathers.

"Oh, right." He commented over her shoulder. "Came as somethin' of a surprise to me and the missus as well. Ravenclaws, the both of us. I don't doubt that every Ravenclaw worth their house badge has looked for that diadem at one point or another… "

The Dark-Lord-trapped-in-the-body-of-a-lovesick-girl paid no attention to the auror's rambling. She was far too busy seething in Voldemort level rage. Had the auror been looking at her face rather than over her shoulder, he would have seen her eyes glow red.

Her rage was focused on a large wizarding photo of Crown Princess Usagi Serenity sitting in the Great Hall of Hogwarts laughing and carrying on with several students. Even with Usagi happily bouncing about as she was, it was still easy for anyone to see the intricate jeweled diadem on her brow. Worse yet, a very familiar locket on a gold chain dangled just above the bitch's cleavage. Worse yet again, the moon princess in the photo wasn't falling to dark corruption as any half decent victim would.

_Two. Two of my horcruxes out in the open for all the world to see. _Mary's anger began to boil over. _That whore isn't going to settle with just taking my man… she's trying to get rid of me!_

Mary's left hand reached up and traced over the spot on her forehead that would have a crescent moon on it if she were a deranged psychotic mass murdering man right now. As opposed to the female variety, you see. The link to her Beloved was severed almost as soon as he met the bitch in China. Whatever had connected the wizard and witch before was gone now… most likely the Moon Whore's fault.

Mary had to think past her anger. Her very existence was at stake here. What about the other horcruxes? Were they still safe? Still hidden? Bellatrix was unavailable. Rodolphous and Rabastan too. She was going to have to break in to Gringotts again.

The platform was nearly empty now; just Mary and the one auror. He must be waiting for her to leave. Too bad for him. Mad as she was, Mary couldn't not kill someone. Hopefully 'the missus' would understand that.

"Excuse me, sir?" Mary called out with false sweetness.

"Yes, miss?"

The auror walked over to her seat, eager to help the young lass so that he could return to the office and write up his report for the day. She noticed that he did not have his wand in hand… not that it would have helped him any. Her wand was ready.

"Avada Kedavra."

The older wizard jolted in surprise, but was too slow to get out of the way. The spark faded from behind his eyes and his lifeless body fell to the ground. Mary took a moment to admire her work before silently passing through the barrier to Kings Cross Station. There weren't any anti-aparation wards on the other side.

**End Chapter**

**Chapter Note:**

(1) I have no idea if Japanese has an equivalent to Pig Latin, so I'm saying there is one just for the sake of this joke.

**OMAKE**

**An Overabundance of Cuteness**

Late 30th Century A.D., Mare Serenitatis

(End of commercial break)

"Ohayooooooo!" An unseen uber-cute girl called as a field of cherry blossoms covered the screen from left to right.

Cutesy jingly bells and the sound of a soft breeze filled the viewer's ears. Suddenly a cloud of teal hair blew into frame.

"Sammy has come to play!" Sammy revealed herself, pink eyes sparkling and white teeth shining for the camera.

The audience showed their applause. Granted, there was an applause sign, so they were supposed to do that. The music changed. Soft violins and perky flutes filled the airwaves as a cloud of lily petals blew in stage right.

"Hello Sammy!" The screen transitioned to a beautiful little artist at her easel, platinum-blonde hair drifting back and forth before crystal blue eyes. "Gabby welcomes you with all her heart!"

Awwwwweeee. The studio audience was driven to tears of joy for the innocent love of friendship on display before them. The screen flashed once again as rose petals filled the air. A full marching band began to hum and crash as a high pitched scream passed quickly from stage right to stage left and back again.

Suddenly, a pair of highly conspicuous rainbow curtains stage right burst open and a honey blonde haired girl with greenish-blue eyes spun theatrically around on her junior sized broom.

-Smack!-

"Owieeeee!" She cried. "Lulu needs to work on her landings more!"

The studio audience shook and howled with laughter. That Lulu, when will she learn?

Sammy, Gabby and Lulu all assembled center stage and gave each other a Big Hug. Awwwweee.

-KNOCK- -KNOCK-

A loud knocking was heard from the shiny red oversized door opposite the curtains. All three girls called out in mock confusion:

"Oh, my. Who could it be?"

The three girls pulled shiny, sparkly cutesy wand-thingies out of their... somewhere... and pointed at the door. Again they called as one:

"Open says me!"

And the door opened wide.

A large cloud of dry ice smoke, glitter and little birdies came forth accompanied by the notes of a chorus of young girls.

"IIIIIII'M BAAAAAAACK!" The sing-song shout was cute, high pitched and very familiar. It should be, it came from the main star of the show.

Crown Princess Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter pranced onto stage and curtseyed for the studio audience.

"CUTENESS!" The other three shouted and giggled. The audience ate it up.

Big Hug time again!

"Where have you been, Cuteness?" Sammy mock pouted. Awwwweeee.

Cuteness grinned at the audience. "I went to the past to see Queen Mommy and King Daddy get married!"

There was much rejoicing. And then they all sang the Wedding Song.

And then there was a commercial break.

As rebroadcast from: _Crown Princess Cuteness_, Episode 89,863-A – Introduction

Yes, I know that the other three girls would not _still_ be children even if they were immortal too. It's an omake. Plot holes taste good with ketchup in omakes.


	20. Not Dead Yet

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here. I don't own Ghostbusters yet much of my first scene is shamelessly lifted from that movie.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Twenty****: Not Dead Yet - or - The Actual Penultimate Chapter, This Time For Sure**

July 5th, 1997

Tokyo was a big city. Lots and lots of ordinary people lived there and there was also a large concentration of extraordinary people... and things... to provide balance. Youma and youkai, demons and daemons, aliens both from other countries and other planets as well. Even though these unnatural and/or supernatural beings didn't always mean to go ape shit in the middle of the city in the middle of the day... well... sometimes it just happened that way.

"Are you sure about this?" Harry Potter asked his friend and D.A. compatriot Colin Creevey.

"Absolutely, Harry." The latter young man stared at the former with utmost confidence. "I've got this. You know that muggles remember a lot of big nasties from back in the old times... dragons and demons and such. This one is another of those cases. I know exactly what we're dealing with here!"

Harry thought over his options, absently stroking his chin in the process. He wasn't quite sure how the muggleborn wizard knew this one when Hermione drew a blank on it.

"His information has been completely accurate so far, Harry." Sailor Mercury commented from the Chosen One's right. She was cross indexing power signatures and histories on the Mercury Computer. "Though I cannot explain how, he does seem to be knowledgeable about our enemy today. We are matched against a god worshiped by the Hittites, Mesopotamians and Sumerians around eight thousand years ago. The police records from earlier today regarding one 'Vinz Clortho' and his rampage through the shopping district this morning confirms everything."

"Well," Harry mused. "As we know very well that a gorgeous, sexy goddess actually did rule the Moon twelve thousand years ago-" a saucy wink was thrown Sailor Moon's way, "I have no problem giving this chap the benefit of the doubt. We still have to beat his ass though."

"So I can do it?" Colin asked, hope radiating from his face.

Harry locked eyes with his Love. She waited only a moment before nodding yes. "Fine."

"Yes!" Colin pumped his fist once and pulled his broom out of his robe pocket.

"But if Moon or Mercury or anyone else tells me the plan isn't working then we'll do it the hard way."

Colin's head bobbed like a house elf even as he tapped his broom to expand it. "You won't regret this, Harry... I'll remember this as long as I live!"

"That better damn well be a long long time, Colin." Harry called back, expanding and mounting his own broom.

"Language, Harry!" Came twin shouts from Moon and Hermione. God bless 'em both.

Harry picked up his silver haired honey and climbed into the air. Behind him, a small cloud of brooms began to rise from the streets of Tokyo and followed him ever higher. Many of those brooms carried Senshi passengers as their final destination today was too high for roof hopping to manage. Their target was at the very top of a Ginza sky-scraper. Outside.

Below them, a second group of magicals (including most of the English visitors, Outer Senshi and Chibi-Moon) controlled the streets immediately surrounding the target building. They were prepared to give support whether it was for reinforcements or for keeping anyone from going 'splat' after a long fall. Outside of that one city-block magical exclusion zone was a ring of Tokyo police barricades, JSDF forces, reporters galore and vast waves of humanity. Whether it was intentional or not, these international magical assaults were becoming easier to plan for and early warnings were reaching everyone quicker. Pluto refused to comment on any influence she may or may not have or the PR bonus such successful operations would surely generate.

Two dozen broomriders passed row upon row of glass windows and the top of the tower came nearer with every second. Unlike other squared off glass towers that dominated the skyline, this one had a distinct gothic feel to it, especially the top ten floors and antenna area. All too soon they touched down. Harry, Neville, Ron and two manically happy Creevey brothers landed and put away their brooms. Just behind the boys, a line of Senshi took up position. Behind them, a group of witches and wizards stayed in the air on their brooms, ready to strike if needed. They all looked around.

Under a swirling gray mass of clouds, a gate lay open in the face of the fifty-or-so year old edifice. To either side of the gate sat a pair of horned glowy-eyed demon-dogs. Standing before the gate stood a vaguely feminine being with a skin tight suit and poorly styled hair. Behind her was a portal to another realm, a gateway to a temple that was not of this Earth.

Colin took one bold step forward and spoke.

"Gozer the Gozerian! Good evening!" Colin paused to give a big thumbs up to his brother Justin. "As a duly designated representative of the city of Tokyo, the country of Japan and the magical people of Earth, I order you to cease any and all supernatural activity and return forthwith to your place of origin or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension!"

Justin piped up. "That ought to do it. Thanks very much, Colin."

Gozer the Gozerian replied. "Are you a god?"

Colin looked at Harry. Harry palmed both of his wands and nodded. Everyone else that had a wand brought them into guard position. Colin looked back at the ancient Sumerian god and replied enthusiastically. "No!"

"Then..." Gozer stated, bringing its arms back and then forward again, "DIE!"

Thick bolts of raw energy rolled out of the Ancient One's open palms only to wash over a wall of magical shields.

Well, almost.

Several of the boys were pushed back rather hard even if their Protegos held in the face of a magical assault. Colin himself was pushed over the side of the building and would have entered free fall if not for the quick reflexes of Jupiter who grabbed the boy before he had fallen too far.

"I swear Colin Creevey!" An irate girlfriend on a broom shouted at him from nearby. "You are sooooo sleeping on the couch for the rest of the trip!"

Colin looked between Jupiter above him, Myrtle beside him and the forty floor sheer drop below him. He tried to hold back his smile. Really he did. This was totally worth any punishment he could be subjected to later.

"Yes, luv." He replied dutifully.

Behind Jupiter, Justin's voice was just loud enough to be heard. "Colin, when someone asks you if you're a god, you say, 'Yes!'"

Colin got a lift up, and as the news crews got a long distance battle sequence the other Senshi were throwing pot shots over the wizarding shield wall. It wasn't working. At one point, the pre-historic bitch just up and vanished even as two Senshi attacks and a witch's blasting hex passed right through her.

"SUBCREATURES!" Gozer's voice boomed over the cityscape. "GOZER THE GOZERIAN, GOZER THE DESTRUCTOR, VOLGUUS ZILDROHAR, THE TRAVELLER HAS COME. CHOOSE AND PERISH."

"Right!" Colin shouted now that he was back up and ready to fight. "Like I said before we came up here, there's going to be some kind of monster that one of us will pick. As we can't keep our minds blank forever, try to pick something cute and mostly harmless!"

"Like what?" Usagi asked.

"THE CHOICE IS MADE!" Gozer's voice rolled over the rooftops. "THE TRAVELLER HAS COME!"

THUMP

Everyone not scanning the dimensional gate or keeping an eye on those two nasty demon-dogs turned to look into the city.

THUMP

A bit of red something could just be seen between two high-rise buildings two blocks away.

"Fuck me, you can't be serious!" One of the girls shouted.

"Venus!" Came her Princess's scolding.

THUMP

"What! I'm working on my English here... and I think this one's my fault anyway." The blonde Senshi with orange skirting answered.

"Oh?" Harry asked.

He didn't really doubt her claim as the flighty girl never seemed to turn off her brain and was thus unable to not 'choose', but he still wanted to know what was coming. It finally cleared a corner and turned onto their street.

THUMP

"I've been watching the BBC recently to update my English." Venus commented. "There's this new kid's show called the Teletubbies on now and _that's_ one of the main characters."

And so it was. Before them stood a twelve story behemoth, a great red beast with soft round edges and a wide smile. On its belly was a somewhat sparkly grey square and above its innocent looking face was a circular red antenna. At its feet, the good people of Tokyo were screaming and running for their lives.

Not one of them said 'look, it's Godzilla' so stop asking.

THUMP

"It's Po." She answered. "The little one." Venus added as an aside. This Po most certainly was not little.

"The new combatant is of a previously unknown energy type." Mercury cut in. "I don't see any indicator of ranged energy attacks, but then I doubt it needs anything more than its mass to be destructive."

THUMP

"You know..." Moon called. "I really don't like the idea of letting that thing try to climb this building."

Two more steps and it would be on their block. Moon and Harry looked at each other. Harry nodded at Moon.

"_Okay, everyone listen up!"_ The magical girl princess called. Her Senshi listened. _"As soon as that thing steps onto our block, we Senshi are going to combine our attacks and blast that temple behind those doors!"_

When Moon pointed at the temple behind the dimensional gates, Colin glanced at Justin and mouthed the words 'cross the streams' at him. There was a nod and a wink back.

THUMP

"_Yes Princess!"_ Came a chorus of magical girl voices.

For the first time, the great children's programming derived beast moved within reach of the sky-scraper they were standing on.

THUMP

Po looked up. Po stopped smiling. Po got angry. Po's belly telly began displaying pictures of tortured souls dissolving in a sea of hot boiling acid. Many Shubs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of a Sloar that day, I can tell you.

"POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" It roared. Yes, yes. Very original.

"_Now!"_ Moon shouted before turning towards the mystical temple and transitioning into her attack sequence.

One exotic and mildly erotic magical combo attack sequence later, a rainbow infused ball of fused elemental death flew through the gates atop the Tokyo sky-scraper and impacted right at the apex of Gozer's temple in... wherever the hell that place was supposed to be.

BOOOOMMM!

And just as the temple snuffed it, so too did the giant kiddie show character. The stop-motion peril was no more.

After the smoke cleared and all of the teen aged heros and heroines peeked back out from behind whatever cover they found before the boom, Colin looked over the broken stone and shattered steel that once was an elaborate decorative roof top. He found time for one last quote from his most favoritest movie ever.

"Boy," he said, "the superintendent's going to be pissed."

When Venus got back to ground level and saw how many people were cheering and dancing about, she whooped in joy and stole a kiss from Harry. _ "I love this town!"_

It was just another day in Tokyo, really. No big deal.

* * *

Mary Riddle banished a rock over the ground. She watched it bounce off the ground once before shattering against a tombstone. She was beyond angry. Only the fact that she was currently female and not menstruating (The Dark Lord did understand such things; some rituals were very specific.) kept her from going out on her own killing spree. She was running low on horcruxes. Inconceivable!

She knew her diary was lost in Malfoy's foolish plot some four years ago. The Moon Whore had her diadem and her locket and Mary had no illusions as to their ability to withstand Usagi's white magics. The ring, Mary's last link to her Slytherin blood line, was missing.

Tom Riddle was the name on the gravestone she was sitting on. Here was the man who held ultimate responsibility for bringing Lord Voldemort into this world. Here was the man who gave the Dark Lord a second chance at life through his unknowing sacrifice two years ago. Here lies the man who would not stay with his… her mother. She idly toyed with the idea of bringing the rest of him above ground to see if there was enough left to make an inferi. Probably not. Better go with option B.

Checking to make sure that there were no muggles in the graveyard at the moment, Mary quickly hiked up her skirt, took a crouched stance and watered the grass above her father's grave. It wasn't Crucio, but it helped take the edge off.

Just as she was re-seating her knickers, a pulse of troubling news reached her through her familiar bond. Concerned, she closed her eyes and concentrated on her snake Nagini. Nagini was hurt. Nagini was being hunted.

Mary pushed more of her magic into the bond, focusing on her familiar's sight. She needed to know where Nagini was and who her attackers were. She needed to know where she could apparate to so she could save her living horcrux.

Looking inside, Mary saw a thick woodland in her mind's eye, the young trees too close to apparate between. And her attackers?

A flash of red streaked by leaving a blue light trail behind. The trees in front of Nagini fell apart as if cut into ribbons. The scene blurred as the great snake spun her head around at the sight of a purple orb of light. Four meters of muscle and scales threw itself out of the way as an explosion tore several more trees out of the ground. The image blurred one more time as Nagini looked up into the noon day sun. A figure fell from the sky, a purple blur holding pair of large heavy _somethings_. Suddenly, Nagini's vision was blocked by one of those somethings... maces apparently… and then there was darkness.

Mary jolted out of her trance. Her familiar bond shattered before disappearing altogether. _How could they know?_ Angry and off balance as Mary was, she wasn't about to apparate into that little bit of forest and ask those people who they were and how they knew to hunt down Nagini.

Did they already have Hufflepuff's cup?

She had to go to Gringotts. She had to get there as quickly as possible. She had to save her last link to immortality before it was taken from her. Then… then she had to make her way to Japan and to Harry as fast as she could without being detected.

Harry had to know how much she was giving up just to be with him. Harry would save her from the Moon Whore just like he'd saved all those other girls from… well… her. He'd save her and then he'd make her his and together they would finally be able to rule the wizarding world through terror and magical strength.

Mary would have her happily ever after. Yes, damn them all to Hell, she would.

* * *

_~Ding~_

Elevator doors opened. Hermione Granger left the moving metal box with a bounce in her step and a smile on her face. She was beginning to get used to staying at the Tokyo Disneyland Hotel. The first night she stayed there, she was terribly excited, too excited to sleep even. She and her sister were sharing a room! A Cinderella themed room! True, she had been on palace and estate tours that displayed true old wealth- but then she'd never been allowed to sleep in any of those rooms. The room she and her sister were sharing was much better than anything her Mum and Dad ever rated on holiday. Ahhhhh, revenge. So sweet.

Hermione wasn't on her way to meet Juliet this time. In fact, the younger Granger girl was actually mixing with some of the other muggleborns down in the lobby; they were about to go on a tour of local temples and historic sites. Remus, Tonks and some local guides courtesy of the English Embassy would be keeping them all inline today. Okay, so the Embassy staffers were almost guaranteed to be intelligence agents of some sort... none of the students were about to complain. Harry and Usagi certainly weren't hiding... only in town for forty-eight hours and the two had five interviews between them. Why, even Hermione and Ginny were asked to answer questions from reporters last night and it seemed to go rather well. Did she mention the news crew had BBC credentials? Full video and all? Suck it, Mum.

Hermione made the last turn on the last hallway. Before her lay the hotel's best accommodations, the Walt Disney Suite. Just putting her hands on the doorknob sent chills down Hermione's body. Yes, she was a witch. Yes, her closest dearest friend was the Chosen One, Lord Harry James Potter. And _yesssss_, she was on good terms with the only known genuine Crown Princess of _Magical Girls_ in the last _twelve thousand years_. But... _damn_. The daughter of two dentists never expected to rise to the social level required to have access to a suite like this one, not even as a friend of those who were staying in the room. Harry and Usagi had friends in high places- on second thought, Harry and Usagi were themselves in high places. Sometimes Hermoine forgot that. They always seemed so grounded to her.

She remembered Harry Potter, the short, thin, poorly dressed little boy that needed friends more than he needed fans. She remembered Usagi Tsukino, the ghostly girlfriend Harry just happened to meet in the middle of Nowhere, China. Hermione's life had changed, it had changed in a big way, and she wouldn't give it back for all the tea in China.

High places indeed. Considering what the Gryffindor alpha level bookworm knew of Usagi's Royal Lunar Vault holdings, she was fairly certain that Harry and Usagi could buy all the tea in China and still be Midas level rich afterwards.

She entered the suite with a bright smile. Old Mad-eye might have scowled at the apparent lack of security, but then he didn't know Pluto all that well. Hermione once overheard the woman talk about contracting out a ninja clan. Pluto didn't look like she was joking at the time.

"Good morning Lady Greengrass." Hermione sweetly called out to the matron of the Greengrass family. Melian and her girls were in the main room of the suite discussing wedding styles and fabrics with some well heeled local women.

"Good morning, Hermione." Melian replied. "Harry and the boys should be ready for you in a few minutes. Have you met our hostess and her attendants?"

During a polite exchange, Hermione was introduced to the locals, Crown Princess Masako and two of her handmaidens. She then dropped back to watch Melian work some fashion magic, figuratively speaking, with Her Highness. Hermione knew she was too progressive (not girly enough) to have much to add, so she slipped away from the meeting. In the next room over, she found Usagi, her mother Ikuko, Rei, Ami and Naru all cooing over a traditional (if very high end) Shinto bridal kimono that Crown Princess Masako brought over with her.

"Hullo, Hermione." Luna called. The dirty blonde Ravenclaw was standing at one of the windows and admiring the view. "It's a lovely day out."

Hermione smiled and moved over to her quirky yet faithful friend. "It is indeed. The boys and I will be off soon I expect. We've some business to take care of while everyone's in town. Will you be okay today? Have any plans?"

Luna turned her sweet smile from the window view to her witch friend. "Yes, you do have a lot of work ahead of you... and I'll be going with you."

Hermione was surprised. Not angry, just surprised. "May I ask why?"

Luna's eyes seemed to float through the room, but they were clear and sharp. She could hold off on smoking for a week easy. It's not like she was being harassed by the bitchier Ravenclaws here outside of the castle so escapism wasn't necessary.

"Why, I'm going with, of course."

What? "I'm sorry?"

"Don't be. You've done nothing wrong."

Hermione gaped at Luna for a moment. Was she being serious?

"I meant to say... I meant to ask if you are really coming along. You do know what this trip is about, right? Mostly bloke-type things... the bachelor party and all that..."

"I understand Hermione. I've known Ron Weasley since before he knew what a bludger was and we can all agree that he lacks the organizational skills required to get a bunch of Wizards drunk and sexed in a foreign country. They need us." Hermoine was beginning to agree with Luna. That in and of itself was plain scary. "Besides, if I'm going to jump out of a cake, I need to know what the cake is going to look like so that I can get a matching outfit. I don't want to clash, you know."

Luna not clashing. That will be the day. Wait...

"Are you even sure you want to do that, Luna? We haven't really settled on the 'entertainment' and you're... you're not the only applicant for the position." Left unsaid and carefully hidden was the fact that Hermione was still sort of maybe thinking about possibly doing it herself. She wasn't sure though. This wasn't the kind of issue a trip to the library could help resolve.

"I'm quite willing to act like a gelfling in heat if it means that Harry will help me get more use out of that gag reflex suppressing spell again. That really was fun, you should try it." The younger witch paused for a moment suddenly looking slightly troubled. "But then... am I to enter the cake before they bake it or after? If it's the latter, then that sounds rather messy... and if it's the former, then that sounds both messy and painful. Perhaps you're right, Hermione. I should probably let another girl jump out of the cake."

Hermione sighed and smiled softly. One less problem to deal with.

"I shall be the tart that brings the cake into the room. Yes... that will work much better as I can chose where to let the icing 'accidentally' stick to me and where Harry will have to lick it off." Luna's eyes sparkled dangerously and a light blush covered her cheeks. "Oh, yes... that will work nicely."

Never mind. Hermione could deal with Luna later. She really didn't want to ruin this morning with a headache. The door which lead into the next room opened and several young wizards tumbled out laughing and roughhousing with each other.

"Oh, thank Merlin..." Hermione muttered under her voice before forcing herself to remember why she was here in the first place. "Harry! Ready to go?"

"'Mione!" Harry greeted her with one of his knee weakening smiles and a hug. "Saw that interview you gave yesterday... they were showing it on the morning news, you know."

Hermione lost a bit of her cheer. She felt like she had just taken her O.W.L.s and didn't know the results yet. "Oh? Were they fair or was it a Skeeter style hack job?"

Harry kept his smile. That was a good sign. "No torch and pitchfork crowds far as I could tell, 'Mione. I think I heard something about trouble getting followups with your family and neighbors though."

"Well it's not like I expected the Spanish Inquisition-" Hermione saw Harry's eyes light up and his mouth open, "Stop right there Harry!"

It was like she just kicked his puppy.

"Fine." Harry sighed. "Ready to go?"

* * *

Mary looked out the airplane window. Blue skies all around. The clouds were under her, not above her. Interesting.

She hadn't done this before. Nor had _he_. _He_ never would have. _He_ would have set this whole machine on fire after slowly flaying the skin off anyone that considered this an acceptable method of travel. Mary didn't have the time to flay skin... not if it wasn't the skin of a Lunar Crown Princess anyway... it was a time consuming method of torture and very messy as well.

Time was something she was fast running out of. Harry's eternal enslavement by the Moon Whore was drawing near and Mary needed to be in Japan long enough to plan out his rescue. She may not be a snake faced monster-man right now but even _he_ took the time to plan things out. _He_ didn't get to become a Dark Lord by rushing into situations after all.

Mary ran her hand over a small bit of gold resting in the dip of skin right above her sternum. Muggles called it a charm necklace. Ha. Well this was was definitely charmed... charmed to keep Dark Lords away. _He_ would probably marry the Moon Whore and kill Harry just to torment Mary... if he ever got loose again. She couldn't have that. In order to prevent that from occurring, she charmed a little lightning bolt 'charm' to cover the wearer with a continuous Impervius spell. As she charmed it herself, there would be few wizards or wards capable of breaking the enchantment without her knowledge. Viola! Lord Voldemort would not be able to retake control of their shared body again!

_Bwuah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! _

Luckily, she was able to keep that maniacal laughter deep inside. No need to scare the muggles.

Enough of such unpleasantness! Where was she? Oh, yes... in an airplane on her way to Japan. She'd only been in the air for about an hour now, but just looking out the window, she could tell that no auror would be able to get to her even if they knew where she was. Moving this quickly this high up in the air represented a target that not even her alter ego would have been able to hit and, whiny bitches that they were, the wizarding world would never think of asking muggles where this particular airplane was going. Harry might have asked, but then he was already in Japan anyway.

Flying on a muggle plane was actually turning out to be somewhat enjoyable. While there was little to do on what would be a very long flight, the Dark Young Lady was used to lying in wait for events to unfold properly. Mary kept from getting bored with bits of discreet magic to occupy her time. Crying baby? Asleep with Somnium. Headstrong grope-happy C.E.O.? Crying in the bathroom with a nasty dark fear enhancing curse. Boring low quality complementary lunch? Potioned to ensure that this was the highest the passengers would ever trip in their lives.

Every few minutes, Mary would stop screwing with the other passengers long enough to run her hand over the pocket she charmed to hide a very important artifact. A golden cup to be exact. She wasn't about to let it out of her sight now that someone was actively looking for horcruxes. They hadn't found her yet and she was hopeful that they could continue to fail in that regard.

She couldn't let them get her. Harry needed her. He needed her and she would be there for him. Love demanded it. Love conquered all, or so the lesser beings were known to say. This time she hoped they were right.

* * *

"_Thank you." _Harry called softly to his Love.

She giggled lightly and pushed deeper into his embrace. _"What for?"_

"_For being what you are. For being who you are." _He pressed a delicate kiss into her temple. _"Thank you for being there for me."_

More giggles. _ "You saved me from the pools of Jusenkyo, my Harry. I'm supposed to be the one thanking you."_

Usagi ended her comment with a somewhat suggestive shift of soft skin below the covers. Harry grinned widely, not that Usagi could see it though another part of him lower down responded. This just led to more enticing movements and more heated breathing against his chest too.

"_I mean it though."_ Harry pushed onward. _"I was miserable until I met you. I was miserable and my future was bleak. I mean... what if I hadn't run off to China in a magical panic. What if Dumbledore and Snape were able to see their plan through?"_

"Ewwwwwwww..." Harry's bedmate shuddered and pulled in on herself a little bit. Such a mood killer. _ "Let's not talk about what could have been Harry. I always have faith that what I do will turn out for the best."_

"_I wish I had your faith." _Harry murmured into her hair. _"I know Cuteness is from the future and all that, but we also know that the future can change. It can get very bad very quickly. That still scares me sometimes."_

Usagi made an effort to uncoil and pull deeper into Harry. _"My faith is simple; I believe in love and justice. I live for love and justice and everything I do and everything I am is dedicated to those two things. My love is absolute. How can it not be? Really, I don't understand how so many people in the world can live lives without love; hating everyone and everything they touch. I know that there are monsters out there who are born of darkness and hate- but to see a man walking down the street with no hope for the future? No love of life itself? It makes me want to cry sometimes. And then to see someone like him prey on those who are weaker than himself, seeing him take away their love and joy... that's when I think Venus is right. Justice isn't about only defending people from demons and aliens, it's about defending them from hate and darkness in all it's forms."_

"_And that is why I love you so much." _ Harry kissed her temple again. _"Mum and Dad would have loved you. I'm sure of it."_

"_I... I'm sorry, Harry." _Usagi whispered.

He held her more tightly in answer._ "Whatever for"_

"_You're in this for the long haul now, my Harry. You'll be by my side for centuries. Alive. The whole time."_

Ah. He could see where this was going now. Mum and Dad.

"_Don't worry yourself about it, Love. I can wait to meet my parents until you're ready to meet them with me. I'm not about to leave either you or Cuteness until I absolutely have to."_ Another kiss. _ "And let me tell you... It will take more than some all powerful Sumerian god figure or some alien race hell bent on galactic conquest to break apart our family."_

"_See?"_ She answered. _"You do have faith in love like I do or you wouldn't be able to say that. It's the scars on your soul from Tom Riddle and Albus Dumbledore and all the others that make you forget sometimes. I will heal your heart... heal it of every single scratch. And when I'm done, we'll heal the world- the whole world."_

"_I think you'll find that some people don't want to be healed, Love. Do you intend to force the issue?" _ Harry challenged. Could the Greater Good claim Usagi like it did Dumbledore?

"_I won't make them. They'll have to want it." _ Usagi sighed. _"People don't strive to live in a utopia because they don't believe it will work. Most people don't believe in a perfect society any more than they believe in magic."_

"_And we know magic is real…"_ Harry offered.

"_And when I build my perfect kingdom free of violence and hate, everyone else will see what we've done. They'll see how happy and loved and prosperous my people are. They'll want happiness and love in their lives like we have… and I will happily show them how to find it."_

"_You make it sound so easy."_

"_It won't be- and it will start off small… but it will get bigger. We have lots of time. Remember how old Cuteness is, my love."_

"_That's right."_ Harry gave his Love a squeeze. _"If nothing else, I want our daughter to live in the absolute best world possible… and if there is one thing I have learned about magic, it's that anything is possible."_

Usagi smirked into Harry's chest and gave him a squeeze _down there_. _"If you and I are going to make the perfect little girl, then I think we need more practice… you know... so we can be sure to get it right."_

Harry didn't reply with words. He moved his lips to hers and began practicing.

* * *

Meanwhile, in a crime infested entertainment district in Tokyo, Sailor Pluto was killing people. Well, she was _about _to kill people.

It began simply enough with a group of tattoo covered criminals who came together tonight to discuss a new revenue source that just now seemed to be opening up to them.

"_So are we agreed?"_ The man at the head of the table asked.

His gaze passed from man to man in turn and while some seemed hesitant, they all agreed in the end. The possibilities were just too great to ignore.

"_Good. It's settled."_ He knocked back a shot of sake before taking another drag from his cigarette_. "So tell me more about the Tsukino family… Nabiki-chan…"_

Several snorts and amused chuckles filled the room as every yakuza thug there turned his attention to the lone woman in the room. Nabiki Tendo was bound to the chair she sat in, unable to move her hands or feet enough to do anything other than put up an amusing struggle. She wasn't blindfolded, that could be interpreted as a sign of weakness… fear that someone might actually try to catch them. That wasn't going to happen. The local family had too much power for Nabiki to hurt them in any way. Hell, she could even identify the buildings on the other side of the window behind the top man, not that it would help her to bring up charges when she didn't know which local police officers were legitimate and which were on the take. That's what she gets for focusing all of her research time on politicians and not crime syndicates. Damn.

"_Don't keep me waiting, Miss Tendo."_ The yakuza lieutenant at the head of the table drawled. _"My dearly departed wife kept me waiting once."_

He took his cigar and pushed it into a tray, crushing the ashes flat.

"_Once."_

Okay, Nabiki was officially freaked out. Sure, she got death threats all the time… but this was different. This was a death threat delivered in person while she was bound and helpless in a goddamn office chair.

On the other hand, these men were criminals who had just voted in favor of demanding favors and protection money from magical girls. It was no secret that magical girls in general and the Senshi in particular were young and beautiful. A magical girl lover would be the crown jewel on any man's personal scorecard. And magical girls could use magic; like magic strong enough to do mass property damage. And according to Miss Tendo's own news stories, at least one of them was extremely rich.

And soon they would know where Sailor Moon's friends and family slept at night. Who knows… squeeze Moon hard enough and she might identify some of the other mahou shoujo if it meant that her soon to be new masters would be lenient with her.

"_Umnnn… well…"_ Nabiki stalled even though she knew that would just make things worse for her. She didn't want to be the woman responsible for putting Sailor Moon under the yakuza's thumb.

"_Nabiki, Nabiki, Nabiki…"_ A somewhat disappointed voice called out. _"I would have expected all of your experience with Ranma's escapades a few years back to teach you to be more careful."_

Only, the voice didn't come from in front of her and it wasn't a man's voice. In fact it was the one voice she was desperately hoping to hear ever since she realized that her nightcap was drugged.

"_Pluto."_ Nabiki called back. She tried to sound not-panicky. Probably failed.

"Well look at that, boys!" The head man crowed. "It's the den mother and her two dykes! Looks like we got some entertainment for the night lined up already!"

There was a round of harsh laughter up and down the table. It looked like the boys didn't take three magical girls magically appearing in their midst as a threat. Pluto, Neptune and Uranus would have to do something about that.

"_I really should thank you gentlemen for organizing this party."_ Pluto called, much to Nabiki's surprise. Did the Senshi _want_ to whore out to these thugs? _"My Crown Princess has recently revised her goals for the future. Not that she is dropping 'love and justice' because she still believes fully in those concepts…"_

Pluto waited for the laughter to die down.

"_By order of Her Royal Highness, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon, I do hereby declare that humans who are deemed sufficiently corrupted or dark are to be reformed if possible… or punished if necessary."_

When Pluto went silent again, the crime boss opened his mouth.

"_That's a pretty voice you got, kitten! Let's see what you sound like with my dick half-way down your throat."_

Pluto twitched. She didn't twitch in a way that would register to any of the men in the room, but it would register to her two companions. A minor application of localized time compression magic and two Senshi attacks were set loose before anyone else could blink much less draw a blade or a gun.

Outside, in the never ending flow of people that made up Tokyo's nightlife, hundreds of people were caught by surprise when a third floor window blew out violently in a mix of blue and green magical pyrotechnics.

On the other side of that busted window the yakuza lieutenant sat quietly in his chair, waiting for his hearing and vision to return. At the other end of what used to be a table, Nabiki was having the same problem. She rubbed at her eyelids and scratched her ears. Hey, at least she was loose again.

"_Let this be a lesson to you and your kind."_ Pluto announced as she calmly walked around the still warm bodies now littering the floor. _"You will all repent your ways- get an honest job or retire early, I don't care which- or you will be 'punished'. Just like these fools were."_

"_I've got contacts." _The man tried to collect himself even as he stared down three magical girls._ "Lawyers, cops, judges. You just screwed yourself, bitch."_

"_I'm the royal adviser to a foreign sovereign. Even if I didn't have diplomatic immunity, my contacts are higher placed than your contacts."_

"_What ever happened to you standing for love and justice and shit?" _The man hissed.

"_Like your own people, magical girls come in all shapes and sizes." _ Pluto almost added 'colors' too. _"Moon is a spiritual leader. We have healers and fighters... other specialists too."_ Pluto nodded back to her two companions. _"These two are soldiers." _Then she pointed to herself._ "Exterminator... among other things."_

As Pluto stared down their one chosen survivor, Uranus picked a still weak Nabiki out of her chair and carried her bridal style over to the blasted window face. Oh, they were going down the quick way. No biggie, Ranma did that with her and her sisters all the time back in the day.

Nabiki was about to snuggle into her Senshi escort for the jump down to street level when she had a very mercenary newsgirl idea pop into her head.

"_Hey, you!" _ She called over the Senshi's shoulder. _"I'll agree not to press charges or even do a story on my kidnapping if I can get an interview out of you. You know... being one of your little brothers is about to be a bad career choice and I figured that you might have some issues to deal with now that your business is about to tank."_

All he could do was glare impotently.

"_Don't fuck with Pluto! Trust me on that!" _ Nabiki warned him even as she was carried clear of the building in one clean jump. Then she felt her privacy being violated. _ "Hey! Uranus! That's my ass you're pinching!"_

Ahhh. Flying through the air being carried by some insanely high powered girl who liked other girls. Nabiki almost forgot how fun that was. Maybe she needed to come up with more excuses to hang out with Ranma again.

* * *

July 30th, 1997

The bed moved. _No. Sleeping. Not ready to wake up._

Another jolt. _Damn._ Harry thought. _This bed is entirely to comfy._

As the young Lord Potter's brain slowly came back online, the soft rhythmic padding of feet moved away from his bed. No wonder the bed shook. Someone just got up. Harry desperately fought against being awake, but the sounds of running water and the movement of curtains kept his mind just sharp enough to register the lighting conditions.

It was getting lighter. Hmmm. Must be morning already.

Soon the sound of running water shifted to the higher pitched noise of a shower. And then even that noise shifted as someone stepped into the path of oncoming water and changed the sound to that of someone actively cleaning herself.

Harry smiled even as he desperately held his eyes closed. There was a naked witch in his shower... a naked witch that he had slept with the night before. His smile grew wider. Four times in one night _after_ drinking entirely too much- wait. He was having a bit of a memory issue. What color was her hair again? It was... no, he was sure it was-"

"Harry?"

The wizard in question sat up. Well he tried to. Still pretty tired, you see. He did manage to raise up onto his elbows and crack open his eyes.

Ah. Ami was standing at the foot of his bed. "'Morning, Ami. What can I do for you?"

She didn't blush at hearing her name anymore. Pity. Must be due to all that time spent with the twins. Any embarrassing weak point they find will be run into the ground until the victim either runs away screaming or learns to brush it off and keep going. Most people were of the 'run away screaming' variety when the twins were involved, but it did seem like Ami may have become one of the other type. Good for her.

"Good morning, Harry." Ami continued. "I am here for a couple of reasons. First, I need to make sure you are alive and well after last night's festivities..."

At that, Harry slid out of bed and did a couple of stretches. He looked through each eye individually and even did a heel-to-toe field sobriety test on himself.

"Seems like I'm shipshape, Ami. What next?"

Harry turned to see Ami staring off at an angle, her cheeks and neck flushed red. "Perhaps some clothes, Harry?"

"Oh, bugger..." Harry made a quick dash for the armoire and his underthings. After a short flurry of activity, Harry was mostly presentable. "There... now, you had something else to say?"

Ami made some effort to look at him again. One day, she'd have to ask about all of those scars... but then maybe she better ask Usagi if she knows about his scars first.

"Yes, well... it would seem that the signals we've been tracking have settled down again."

Harry's head snapped up. "Really?"

They were only tracking certain signals. Magical power signatures from a certain Dark Arse and his horcrux to be exact. The signals had been hard to pin down for the last two weeks, meaning they were on the move. Together. One negative of this was that Voldemort had finally wizened up and pulled his last soul shard container out of storage in Gringotts. He seemed to be carrying it with him now as opposed to stashing it in a deep dark hole somewhere. But now... but now they had an idea where he was.

"Where?"

"Tokyo." Ami said with a straight face, not that she would be the type to joke about something like this.

"Really?" His question was answered with a silent nod in the affirmative.

"Well... looks like someone won't be holding their peace at the ceremony then." Harry's brain started spinning up faster. This was serious stuff. No joking about it.

Looks like Voldemort took him at his word about that wedding invitation back when Harry spoke to Nabiki and Arthur and Luna in that first big interview after Usagi came back.

"Pluto?" Harry asked.

"She went back to collect Ranma and Shampoo. She was going to do that anyway of course. They were not going to miss this for the world."

Harry had to grin again. Red had mentioned that she was going to be there come Hell or high water... that she'd even ignore a cure to the curse to be there. Too bad it took so long to meet the fun dynamic dragon that was Ranma Saotome. Harry could have used someone like the him in his life years ago. But that was neither here nor there...

"Pluto still can't give us any more clues, eh?"

Ami gave Harry and apologetic look and shook her head. "I wish I could say otherwise, but no. She's being denied by The Gate when she looks. She even admitted as much to Usagi. She did say that the static was coming down some. She expects to be able to get a lock on Mister Riddle within a week's time... assuming he is still an issue by then, but..."

"But with the signal in Japan now it looks like we may not need to interrupt the honeymoon to go Dark Lord hunting." Harry added when she left her sentence open.

She nodded. He could think things through on his own when he needed to. Of course having the oldest court adviser in history plus two genius level young ladies to fall back on did make him feel much more comfortable about the future.

Still... it was quite unnerving to know that he didn't know where ol' Tom was even when Pluto could tell you where his followers were and just how good or bad a job of hiding they were doing. Mostly bad jobs, by the way, as a very pleased purple haired Chinese Amazon could tell you.

In the background, the sounds of running water ceased. Someone was finished showering.

"Per your request," Ami continued, "Shampoo will be your escort and Ranma Usagi's through both ceremonies. They will be cloaked during the private ceremony before transitioning to more visible positions in the wedding party for the Tokyo Dome half of things."

Harry spent a brief moment silently whining about having to do this in front of a live audience of nearly two-hundred thousand people... and that wasn't even considering the cameras and their audiences. Time's up, Potter. Stop being a whiny bitch and man up. By this time tomorrow (which was sooner in Tokyo than it was here) he would no longer be Usagi's sometimes-husband-sometimes-fiance-based-on-jurisdiction. It would be husband and wife till death did them part.

"Thank you, Ami." Harry smiled warmly at the girl. She smiled in return, though she did look to be ready to go back. "Pluto waiting on you?"

"Un." Ami grunted positively.

Hmmm. She wasn't much of a grunter around him, but then when all the Senshi were working together, they tended to keep the simple answers short and that did translate into their everyday interaction too. If she grunted the same way for him, did that mean he was truly an accepted part of their group now? He liked to think so.

"Well. You best be off now. Give my love to the girls. All of them." Harry reached over and gave the Senshi of Mercury a warm hug, one that was returned in equal measure.

"I will, Harry." She stepped away. "And know that you have our love too."

"Even Rei's?" Harry teased.

Ami giggled lightly. "Yes... Even Rei's love. I'll see you at the temple Harry."

Harry watched Ami walk away. She was almost out of site when she was stopped unexpectedly.

"Ami?"

"Yes, Hermione?"

The out of uniform Senshi turned to see the chief Gryffindor know-it-all with a towel wrapped around her midsection and a shiny mass of wet hair hanging straight down her back. She was also holding out a small gold something or other on a chain for Ami to take with her.

"Give this to Usagi right before she heads off for the first wedding at Rei's temple. It's a potion." Hermione shook the small amphora a bit in an effort to help Ami grab it. "For luck."

"Luck?" Ami repeated.

She knew that Wizarding magic was different from hers, but this was a bit hard to believe even for her. Hermione forged ahead.

"Liquid Luck, or Felix Felicis, is exactly that. I know... doesn't sound like something that would work, right?" Ami nodded. "Well, I've used some of it you see... worked just as advertized... but then Harry and Usagi need it much more than I do, tomorrow being such a big day and all. Well I thought... you know... why leave anything to chance if you don't have to?"

Ami briefly turned to the young wizard standing back by his bed. He nodded. It was legitimate stuff.

"Thank you. I will see that she get's it." Ami bowed slightly before turning and leaving the room.

"Bye-bye, Ami! See you at the wedding!"

Harry's jaw dropped. He turned back to the bed. "Luna?"

"Har-ryyyyyy." Luna pouted. "I've been called a lot of things but forgettable was never one of them."

"Sorry Luna, it's just that I'm a bit surprised is all."

"Oh." She smiled. "Surprised is good. Of course, oversexed would be better..."

"That too, I'm sure."

"Much better then. And thank you for letting me lick the icing off of your cake last night. It was quite tasty." Luna absently began to lick her fingers. One of them actually looked like there was some icing left on it.

"Think nothing of it, Luna. Anytime."

Luna shifted her gaze over to Hermione, who was in the process of asking Kreacher for some robes from 'her' room. Of course she had her own room in Harry's manor home.

"And you, 'Mione. Thank you for being the cake."

Two out of three people in the room blushed heavily. Luna took their pause as an opportunity to find the finger that still had icing and sniff it.

"Hmmmmnn..." Luna hummed to herself in satisfiaction. "Lemon. My favorite!"

**End Chapter**

**Omake: Don't Panic**

Harry was getting ready to apparate from his home in Brunton back to Tokyo when a large bath towel was thrown at his face.

"What's this?" He called out as he batted the offending fabric away.

"It's a towel, Harry." Luna replied as she strolled up to her 'ride' back.

Harry eyed the towel oddly as it fell to the floor. "I see that, but why did you hit me with it?"

Luna sighed dramatically. This brought Harry's attention up from the floor and onto his good if odd friend. How odd, (yet completely like her) she had a towel wrapped around her shoulders.

"You have a towel wrapped around your shoulders." Harry said.

"Yes, and you have one at your feet. Not the best place to keep a towel, Harry." Luna bent over to retrieve the cotton cloth. "Let me get that for you."

Luna then began to smooth out the towel and place it on Harry's shoulders, just as hers was resting.

"Thank you, Luna, but I don't think I'll be needing a towel any longer. I'm dry now, you see." He said.

"I know that, silly…" Luna answered as one would to a small child. "I just want to be prepared in case the Vogons come."

"The Vogons?" Harry had learned of a lot of questionable creatures from Miss Lovegood, but this was the first time she has ever mentioned this one. "What, are they like wrackspurts or something?"

Luna rolled her eyes. _Ouch._ "This one is pure muggle, Harry. I learned all about them from this book on hitchhiking written by a muggle named Arthur Dent. Anyway, towels are quite useful things and, seeing as I have become quite useful to you in the last year or so, I thought I should start wearing one. You should do the same, Harry. You get into all sorts of trouble and you never know when a towel will be just the thing you need to get out of it."

"Funny," Harry murmured, half embarrassed and half confused, "I've never heard any of that before…"

Well… the towel was very soft… and Luna seemed completely at ease with hers. Harry had to admit to himself that this could be one of those muggle things that his Aunt and Uncle never let him take part in. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

"Okay, Luna. I'll try it for one day if that's what you want."

Luna's smile lit up the room.

"Great! I'll get Colin to show you the book later… after the wedding. It's full of sensible advice and practical lessons. Cover's things like 'Don't Panic' and how to make it from place to place without dying a horrible death or being forced to listen to really bad poetry." Luna continued as Harry warmed up to the idea of wearing a towel.

"That does sound practical. The wizarding World needs to spend less time panicking." Harry thought it over. The more he thought on it, the more he liked it. "I'd like to see that book, Luna. Thank you very much for mentioning it."

Luna smiled once more and wrapped her arms around Harry. It was time to aparate back to Tokyo. He had a wedding to prepare for.

**End Omake**

**Chapter Note:**

I know... I didn't reply to reviews from last chapter as usual. But I just got this one written up and everything, so I thought I'd just go ahead and post it. I promise to respond to you guys next time... like even to some to the older reviews and stuff to. Really, really.


	21. Bunny's Big Day

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here. Magic Knight Rayearth isn't mine, nor is Mahou Tsukai Tai! nor Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha nor Wedding Peach nor any of the other magical girls that I may imply take part in the scenes rendered below. The youtube clips were fun to watch though.

**Warning:** There is an over the top quasi western style-ish wedding scene. I can't not write it. I will try to make story relevant remarks within the wedding itself as I don't want it to be considered pure fluff. I will also refrain from recording every single detail to the Nth degree. If you think wedding scenes are for sissies, then you can skip bits once the camera moves inside Tokyo Dome. Perform an alt-f search for 'I do' or perhaps 'Mendelssohn's Wedding March' to skip far enough through to get back to non-ceremony plot elements.

...as seen previously on Violence Inherent in the System...

"_And you, 'Mione. Thank you for being the cake."_

_Two out of three people in the room blushed heavily. Luna took their pause as an opportunity to find the finger that still had icing and sniff it._

"_Hmmmmnn..." Luna hummed to herself in satisfaction. "Lemon. My favorite!"_

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Chapter Twenty-one****: Bunny's Big Day**

**Part One: Riddle's Last Stand**

The sake cup came down again and once again their eyes locked. Harry lost himself in Usagi's sparkling deep blue eyes. Her gold crescent moon sigil shined and her skin practically glowed with raw love (and subtle makeup application). Harry snapped out of his daze when he noticed the priest, Rei's grandfather, take the sake cup from Usagi's hands and give it to him. Rei then stepped forward and refilled the cup in his hand according to ritual.

Harry focused on the cup in front of him as it was being filled, determined not to make a mistake in the middle of his own wedding. Back in the cupboard under the stairs, he never conceived that such a thing as this could happen to him. He never expected to be worthy of a girl's favor much less her heart and future.

He was getting married. Okay... that wasn't _too_ far out there. People do that. Even 'freaks'.

He was getting married to a Japanese girl. That's a bit more rare for a boy from Wales. The neighbors up and down Privet Drive would have had a field day with that one. Hell, maybe they were having a field day now?

His bride was the Crown Princess of the Moon, a magical girl and not just a third string magical girl at that.

Harry brought the now full sake cup up to his lips and drank from it in three measured swallows, careful to drain the cup on the third pull. As he lowered the cup and waited for Grandfather Hino to retrieve it, he thought about the other people here in the room around him.

Traditional Japanese wedding ceremonies were often much smaller than their Western counterparts, primarily restricting the witness list to close family. For this ceremony though, 'family' was expanded to include those who took the role spiritually or symbolically. The Tsukinos and all of the Senshi sat on Usagi's side of the shrine, all in their wedding finest. Standing in for Harry's family was line of wizards and witches; those who followed Harry to the Department of Mysteries, the Weasleys and the Greengrasses. Also on either side of the shrine, two royal families sat representing Japan and England. On Usagi's side, Emperor Akihito and his family watched silently. Queen Mum and the rest of the House of Windsor sat with Harry's family.

True, there were those on both sides' security details that threw a bloody fit over having so many heirs so close together, but then the importance of the occasion plus the massive scope of security provided by Pluto mollified many. Those that still complained were given a reminder of how well Usagi protected her fellow royals at the last big meeting at Buckingham Palace. Those that still complained were told to shut it or else.

If the Dursleys had somehow accidentally made it onto Japanese soil, they would have been cursed and/or shot strait away, so no, they did not attend.

The elder Hino began chanting prayers again. Soon the bride and groom would make an offering to the Gods before having a small reception. It had to be small on account of them getting married again in a more Western and much more magical ceremony as countless thousands watched on.

Oh, and a Dark Lord might actually show up at some point or other. Pluto and Ranma told them not to worry, but, you know what Harry and Usagi are like. Beating the big baddies is kind of their thing.

* * *

"_Welcome back! This is Tendo Nabiki with TV Tokyo reporting to you live from just outside the Tokyo Dome!"_

The camera pulled away to show both Nabiki and the mass of humanity behind her left shoulder. People were slowly marching through the main entrance of the massive public landmark in a steady stream. Above the doors, an obviously enchanted banner announced the current festivities and ran a countdown timer for the main event.

Currently, there was just under two hours before Sailor Moon walked down the aisle.

Smaller magical banners nearby ran messages directing any magical guest to use a different entrance around the building to the right. There were also two large magical (not that anyone could tell) screens projecting live views of what was happening inside. Currently, the j-pop band Heather Snape and the Inner Senshi saved from tentacle demons was putting on a concert in order to entertain the early crowd.

"_Here, you see the crowds surrounding Tokyo Dome's public entrance for this massive event."_ Nabiki continued. _"Security is as tight as you would expect for Sailor Moon's wedding... and just about as magical as you could get too."_

And indeed it was. There were plenty of uniformed officers on hand from the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department as well as a web of JSDF checkpoints, some of which were also manned by British Royal Guards in their tall bearskin hats. Then there were the truly unusual guards. Right at the doors, a quartet of imposing looking women stood. The traditional patterning of colored silks and rough leather mixed with the bright shine of sharpened steel to intimidate anyone who saw the Chinese Amazons. There was also an equal number of aurors on loan from France in open view. Behind the overt security a much more substantial force of Amazons and aurors controlled access into the building, but the average Tokyo native would never see them through all the privacy and security wards in place.

"_As the viewers at home can now see, incoming guests are being separated based on magical ability. Let me assure you all that this is not social discrimination at work. In fact, these are security measures put in place to ensure the safety of both magical and non magical guests. As our blushing bride Sailor Moon is still the only magical girl currently unmasked to the public, event organizers thought it unwise to invite every magical girl in the country without providing some way to help ensure their secrets stayed secret."_

Nabiki looked back to her left. There, some one hundred meters away, was the magical entry point. The cameras tried to get a close up, but there was obviously some form of obscuring magic blurring out the whole area. Nabiki and her crew could easily see dozens, perhaps even a hundred forms on the other side of the field but there was no way to tell who they were.

"_While we can't see what goes on over there, don't fear for the wedding itself!" _Nabiki spoke up again._ "I am told that there are cameras inside the building that will connect to TV Tokyo's network as well as display on large outdoor screens right here at the front entrance. I'm also told these indoor cameras are enchanted to automatically edit out the faces of any magical girl, witch or wizard present- except those in the wedding party itself- so that no one watching will be able to recognize them. Sadly, there are no cameras allowed at the Hikawa Shrine where Lord Potter and Crown Princess Serenity are reportedly engaging in a Shinto wedding ceremony even as we speak."_

Nabiki listened to a voice in her headset and then lightly bowed for a moment before commenting. _"That is correct, Yui, the Imperial Japanese family __**and**__ the British royal family are __**both**__ said to be present at the Hikawa Shrine as witnesses for this historic union." _ Nabiki stopped and bowed deeper to the camera. _ "Okay, guys. That's commercial break. Back in two minutes. Let's try to get some crowd reactions... or maybe even a magical girl who isn't camera shy. That's what I really want."_

Nabiki began to walk off with Kaji and Manny in hot pursuit. Even here at Sailor Moon's wedding the best news was the news you went out and looked for. Maybe she'd get lucky.

Only one hundred meters away behind obfuscation wards, the story Nabiki was looking for played hard to get. Mary Riddle herself was behind those wards at the end of a line of magicals at the magic-only entrance. It was in this line that Mary Riddle found herself quickly running out of ideas.

She didn't aim for the line first, of course. The building was pretty big but then the perimeter was also well warded. That isn't to say that she couldn't pop the wards quickly, 'cause she could. Could she get through them without anyone noticing? No. She also felt the light pressure that always came with the presence of anti-apparation and anti-portkey wards outside of the building. Well, a ward breach could be Plan B if she needed it.

The muggle entrance was also out. Yes, the wards were weak, but then there were aurors scanning for magical signatures. She sat and watched for half an hour as the sentries told half a dozen people that they were in fact magical- even if those 'muggles' refused to believe it. Hell, when Mary put one muggle under a low level compulsion and sent the woman forward, the aurors even caught that. No Imperious spies for her today. Drat. In short, if she tried entering that way, she'd be spotted and have to go wand out and casting. This was a Plan C at best. Cracking the wards near the back gardens seemed much preferable to charging in the front like a Gryffindor.

Whatever Plan A was, it still hadn't occurred to her. All those years of Dark Lording were sadly lacking in any details that might allow her to use this muggle location to her advantage and she didn't have any servants helping her from inside. She'd been moving around the target building since sunup looking for a weak point, and all she had to show for it was a place in the magical girl line. Why this building at all? It came as no small surprise to her that the earlier private ceremony had much more security, both muggle and magical. She expected the guards at the shrine to follow their charges to the larger public venue and planned to make her move before the wedding party could settle in after the venue change.

How to get in? The cover of darkness wasn't available. There were no obvious weak points... and she would have been suspicious had she found one. Maybe this once, she could follow Harry's example and take a chance. Well, Mary wouldn't call it a chance... calculated risk sounded much more Slytherin.

The minutes ticked by as Mary watched a trio of Amazon ki-adepts, two younger women and an old crone, work the magical entry point. Well, Mary was a girl and magical just like the others... sort of. Maybe if the guards didn't push her cover story too hard- or if she could land a discrete compulsion at just the right time- she could get through quietly.

She spent several minutes watching the Amazon warriors at the magical entry point testing a group of five teens. The two boys and three girls were wearing common muggle clothing unlike the true mahou shoujo in line. They almost seemed muggle in comparison... except that they had brooms and wands with them... and one of the girls was wearing a proper witch's hat. Interesting. Mary cast a minor hearing enhancement charm on herself. Seems like these kids were all members of a school level 'Magic Users Club'. The Amazons made each of the five students do some minor magic to prove their place; the boys both chose to do a bit of broom flying and each girl cast a small charm. After the Amazons and aurors were appeased, each teen received a small card... maybe a business card... and the five promptly vanished.

Probably portkeys. Mary would need one of those cards.

"_Hi! My name's Hikaru. What's your name?"_ A girl in line in front of Marry called out. _ "That's a pretty dress you're wearing. Where did you get it?"_

Time to see if her cover would work on local magicals. She was going local, sort of, by dressing in a newly stolen outfit and using makeup that helped mute her European facial features. Mary turned around and came face to top-of-head with a cute little redhead wearing a mostly red outfit with some fairly flamboyant shoulder guards. _"Hello, Hikaru. My name is Mari."_ Mary bowed politely in keeping with local custom and feigned that cute-happy schoolgirl act that seemed to be a universal trait of the girls in line. _ "It's not from anywhere special, but I did get the matching sandals too!" _

Mary took a moment to bend slightly and point one strappy-sandaled foot out from under her floral patterned sundress. Then she rubbed her foot up the back of her other calf to get rid of a few adventurous ants.

"_Oh, that's a nice sword you got there! Where'd you get it?"_

Mary watched the little redhead smile happily and begin to prattle on about some place called Cephiro and how she met a woman in the middle of a forest that made weapons and armor for Hikaru and her two friends. Hikaru then introduced her friends Umi and Fuu. The blue haired one, Umi, was a bit snobbish and the blonde in green was exceedingly polite. They all had swords. Big long ones. Glancing down the line, Mary noticed that every girl there seemed to be proudly displaying a Shiny/Pointy-Thing-of-Power... except for the one or two that actually had wooden wands like hers. It must have been show and tell day. Maybe these girls didn't get to mingle as often as witches and wizards did in the Wizarding World?

Mary displayed her own wand, yew with a phoenix feather core (oooohhhh, aaahhhhh) and told Hikaru and her friends a fanciful lie. She claimed to be a vampire hunter who recently tracked a whole family of undead into Tokyo. 'Mari' heard about the wedding and, like, just _had_ to go. While filling Hikaru's ears with fluff, Mary also kept a close watch on the door.

Muggle soldiers were there of course. Aurors too. Fine, she could deal with those. She had finally read enough old Daily Prophets and Legilimensed enough Hogwarts students to know what ki-adepts were capable of and as such planed to feign weakness unless she was found out. It was the Senshi that had her wishing the building's ward scheme wasn't quite so sophisticated. After all... she really didn't believe any wizard or witch was responsible for hunting down her Horcruxes. The late Albus Dumbledore... maybe... but he was dead- and even if the old man had Harry looking for Horcruxes for him, he would have warned Harry not to let evidence of his success leak out in the form of a Daily Prophet special edition on Founders' Artifacts and the Crown Princesses who wear them.

Having said all that, it was a fair bet that one or more of the Senshi were responsible for eliminating her soul containers... and she was just about to walk past two of them with a Horcrux- her _last_ horcrux- in her pocket. Luckly, the line was a slow moving one, so she still had a bit of time to plot.

As Mary wove a story of fangs and garlic to bewitch three Magic Knights without actually using magic on them, a certain compact magical supercomputer was beginning to make noise just inside the building.

"_He's here."_ Mercury murmured to her taller green haired companion. _ "Tom Riddle is less than one hundred meters distant... both he and his soul fragment should actually be near the end of the magical guest line."_

"_Now you see why you had to live through this morning twice?" _The Senshi of Time and Space teased her shorter companion.

Mercury linked herself into the local CCTV system and scanned the magical girl line via a nearby security camera.

"_Is he under cloaking magic? Is he underground? I don't see any males in that part of the line."_

"_Is this why you told me to shut off the Mercury Computer when we arrived at the shrine?" _ Mercury's fingers blurred over the keyboard. _"Hmmm. Riddle seems to be the last person in line. Could he be possessing that last girl? The dark haired one in a sundress?"_

"_I didn't want contact with Riddle to interrupt Usagi's actual ceremony." _Pluto said in answer to Mercury's first question. _"We'll bring Usagi and Harry into it between ceremonies, assuming this is resolved quickly. If not, then Harry may get to fight Voldemort on live television after all. Well... unless Voldemort runs off again. He does have good track record for escaping when the odds are against him." _

Mercury grunted out an affirmative as Pluto made a hand gesture that the nearby Amazon trio would see. Amazon Elder Cologne walked over to the Senshi.

"_Our target is the dark haired girl in a sundress at the end of the line." _Pluto informed her. _"We don't know if she is a willing or unwilling host, or perhaps even a disguised Dark Lord herself."_

Mercury spoke up as soon as Pluto went quiet_. "I am detecting a wizarding magical core with Riddle's power signature as well as Jusenkyo energy... all in the same person."_

With a final whispered comment, the Amazon elder slipped away. Things began to happen at the other end of the line.

"_Good morning!"_ Hikaru chirped before bowing to someone she saw over Mary's shoulder. Mary tried not to flinch.

"_Good morning to you as well, dear. My, isn't the weather wonderful today? Such a nice day for a wedding…" _

When Mary turned around, she came face to face with the old hag from the front of the line. It was Elder Cologne, Shampoo's great-grandmother not that any of these girls knew that. The elder was balancing herself at the top of her walking stick, her feet not even touching the ground.

"_Could I interest any of you young ladies in some tea?" _

Cologne pulled a full tea service out of her robes much to the delight of Hikaru and her friends. The elder didn't need to use a wand to do that. Mary began to get nervous. At least no one was uncomfortable with her keeping her wand in hand. Several of the girls, Hikaru foremost among them, thought Mary's wand was quite pretty in a natural kind of way.

"_Oh, dear me!"_ Cologne cried as one of the tea cups fell off her serving platter and landed near Mary's foot. _"These old bones just don't work like they used to. Are you all right Miss... ?"_

Mary looked up from the hot tea staining the concrete to see the old woman staring her right in the eye. Damn! She must have seen _something_ in Mary's reaction.

"_Something the matter, dearie?" _

Cologne leaned in closer, still perched on top of her cane and still holding the tea service.

"_No. I- I would just rather have some soda. Something cold. Personally, I think it's a bit warm out today."_

Mary took a half step backwards, silently cursing the wards that prevented her from just apparating out. Fortunately, having the memories of a Dark Lord screaming random threats and advice in her head finally did Mary some good. She didn't need a broom to fly, did she?

She'd had enough. Better to leave while she still could than stay long enough to be caught. Bending her knees, she prepared to kick off of the ground. Unfortunately, this did not go unnoticed.

"_Going somewhere?" _A young woman's voice rolled over Mary's shoulder.

That someone also grabbed her wrists and refused to let go. Mary looked over her shoulder to find a pair of bright blue eyes under a curtain of red hair looking back at her. It was the redhead from Hogwarts. Ranma. This did not bode well for Mary.

Fuck Plans A through C. Mary felt trapped but she still had her wand in hand and she would not just roll over and die. She cast a silent yet powerful engorgement charm at the ground beneath her. Her charm hit the concrete, making it explode due to near instant enlargement. She also hit the line of ants that were giving her calves trouble only a minute ago. The ants got bigger. Much, much bigger.

Many surprised magical girls suddenly found themselves fighting for their lives against giant ants. As this was not how they planned on spending their morning, there was a lot of screaming involved.

With a pair of pony sized ants chomping on her leg, Ranma hit a pressure point on Mary's neck and dropped the now unconscious dark witch to the ground. Ranma then turned around and started beating the shit out of giant ants. The screeching of panicky magical girls was getting on her nerves and Ranma needed to do something about it.

To be fair, only a few magical girls were screaming. Those were mostly the delicate girlie-girl healer-angel types that could practically raise the dead yet couldn't hurt a fly. A few of the more rough-and-tumble girls in line just figured this morning's monster-of-the-day had arrived. Those girls were blasting bug guts all over the sidewalk with frightening speed.

Still, the giant ants were pretty fast for their size and there were quite a few of them. Perhaps if the locals hadn't unloaded a barrage of glowing pastel death at the oversized insects, the aurors behind them might have had a chance to reduce the critters back to their original size. Oh, well... at least some of the girls were having fun.

Back on the other side of the magical/ non-magical divide, people were beginning to notice a disturbance in the force. Strange noises and lights leaked through the obscuring wards. The ground shook. Loud pops and cracks followed by explosions came with greater and greater frequency. Nabiki and every other reporter in a three block radius smelled a breaking story in the making.

On the violent side of the wards, one magical girl stopped chopping up giant ants long enough to see a wounded comrade in need of aid.

"_Hey!"_ Hikaru cried. _"Mari's hurt!"_

Three Magic Knights who until today had done all of their best ass-kicking on another world formed a ring around the motionless witch.

"_Those ants did pop out of the ground right under her." _ Umi added. _"I wonder why..."_

Not having seen Ranma and Elder Cologne's ambush of Mary for what it was, the magical trio resolved to help their new found friend.

"Iyashi no Kaze." Fuu softly intoned over the unconscious dark witch.

All three girls crowded around closer to see how long it took for Mari to get better. Mary opened her eyes.

"_Are you okay?"_ Fuu asked.

"Imperio." Mary replied.

As Hikaru's and Umi's eyes widened in confusion, Fuu's eyes dimmed a little. The mind control magic worked.

Hikaru screamed as a silent banishing charm tossed her through the air and into the back of a girl in white and blue robes. Umi drew her sword into a striking position.

"Midori no Shippu!" Fuu intoned, magically forced to defend Miss Riddle from all comers.

Powerful winds threw Umi back almost as hard as Mary's banisher tossed Hikaru. Unfortunately for Mary, Fuu's use of wind magic got a lot of attention. Senshi and ki-master attention.

"Dead Scream."

A bright purple orb shot past Fuu. Mary leapt into the air to avoid it as well as the two blue ki balls that rolled in right behind Pluto's attack. The concussive force of three attacks pushed Mary further back.

As Mari's captive magical girl brought up a shield wall made of wind, Mary began flying backwards. She also started hurling a steady stream of curses back towards Pluto, forcing the Senshi and anyone near her to throw up a shield or get out of the way. One girl with pink hair and her own wedding dress took one of Mary's darker spells in the stomach; she fell down screaming and vomiting blood.

_Oh no she didn't!_ As more than a dozen white/love magic users saw to their injured sister, a veritable wall of magical weapons were brought to bear. Everyone knew who the bad guy was now.

Mary crossed the obscuration wards becoming the first magical combatant clearly visible to vast crowds of non-magicals - soldier, civilian and news crew alike. Several dozen shiny assault rifles and handguns were brought into position, safeties off.

"_Halt! Put your wand down and surrender!" _Shouts from the guards could be heard over the growing din of excited spectators.

She paid them no mind… she had more dangerous enemies than muggle men and their toys. Lucky for her, the Amazons and aurors guarding Tokyo Dome's doors were still following orders to not leave their posts. She could have been a distraction and not the real attack after all.

Unluckily for her, those weren't the only Amazons here today.

"Damn…" Mary cursed as she watched a purple haired warrior appear behind her Imperioused ally. Fuu was napping on the ground less than a second after a taking a leather boot to the head.

"You, I kill!" Shampoo screamed and took a bounding leap towards Mary, a pair of giant maces in her hands.

Mary put as much effort into getting away from the disturbingly familiar looking barbarian as she could. She was being quite reasonable here, really, as Chinese Amazons don't joke around about who they intend to kill or when they intend to do it.

Shampoo's mad charge missed Mary in mid-air, but the angry Amazon was only a small part of Mary's problems. After Shampoo, she had to dodge a volley of ki balls intermixed with a steadily increasing barrage of magical projectiles and energy beam attacks. A quick look to her rear showed Mary that many of the mahou shoujo felt that staying in line was for pussies. Some were running forward at a full charge. Others were in free flight just a as she was.

Harry really better appreciate what she's willing to do for him once this all settles down.

Nabiki was in heaven. A royal magical girl wedding was the stuff of legends, but everyone knew it was coming. A fight breaking out at the royal magical girl wedding? It gave plenty of extra pop to what was already history in the making. An angry mob of magical girls appearing in broad daylight to beat down one of their own? Priceless. That half of the mahou shoujo in view were clearly unknown players as far as the media were concerned was icing on the cake. Nabiki didn't even react when she saw Ranma pass through the mob in a flanking maneuver meant to join up with Shampoo at the razor's edge of attack.

Mary felt her spell connection to the blonde in green break. Fuu must have been freed of the Imperius. No loss, really. Mary had already picked out her next victim.

"Die now!" Shampoo screamed as she blurred in from below.

There would be no dodging this. Mary didn't want to get away this time.

"Imperio!" Mary shouted, putting as much into the mind control spell as she could.

Shampoo pulled her maces into a blocking position but the magic passed right through as if they weren't there. The Amazon crashed into Mary and they both tumbled to the ground.

"_Good hit, Shamps!"_ Ranma set down next to his wife and reached over to retake control of the naughty witch panting on the ground. _"Now let's tie this bi- __**hey!**__"_

Ranma had to dodge a battle mace... then a foot... then both maces at the same time.

"_Dammit, Shamps! What's gotten into you!" _Ranma began backpedaling away as Shampoo's strikes got a little closer each time.

"Mind control, Son-in-law." Elder Cologne appeared.

She tossed a pitcher of ice water at her own great-granddaughter only to see the girl bat it away. Apparently the mind control magics allowed her enough intelligence to defend from threats like triggering Jusenkyo curses. Maybe Riddle was just that good with unforgivables, for she had Shampoo fully under and yet the Amazon still had mental capacity enough to be creative in helping Mary escape.

"_You wouldn't hit a pregnant woman would you, Airen?" _ Shampoo teased her husband.

That may have been hitting below the belt but boy did it work. Ranma just stood there unable to wrap his mind around the words his wife just used.

"_Pr- p- pre-" __**-WHACK-**_

Shampoo's roundhouse to the face was a clean hit. Ranma fell to the ground, out cold. It would be up to Great-grandmother to subdue Shampoo without hurting the unborn child. And there was one... an unborn child, that is. Shampoo just hadn't gotten around to telling Ranma yet. Surprise!

"Open fire!" The command came from directly ahead of Mary, from the muggle guards.

She turned around just in time to get a volley of full metal jacketed lead in the face… must have gotten close enough to the crowds of helpless muggles to warrant a muggle response.

Mary put her arm up to block any bullets heading for her eyes, mouth or nose. She did not want to know how the Impervious spelled necklace would work if one of those things went up her nose. Having them bounce off of her skin already stung like a bitch even if they didn't tear her open.

Mary's charm didn't make her clothes impervious though, and all of that hot lead really did a number on her dress. It wasn't quite the club hopping look of a bare midriff and miniskirt, but it was apocalypse victim chic.

When the gunfire finally dropped off after a few seconds, Mary opened her eyes to look for the muggle gunmen. There were a lot of them, but the closest group was behind a makeshift barricade. They were also well within spell range. With a jab of her wand, a traffic divider became a gryffon and several rubbish bins became wolves. That shut those muggles up right quick. The defenseless crowds behind the gunmen finally began to run away in a panic. To be fair, a gryffon and several wolves were right scary when seen close up like that.

Mary spun back around and immediately launched a heavy stream of Fiendfyre in the direction of the charging magical girls. Whether she came back to rescue Harry or not, she needed room to escape this hoard of heroines looking to do her in.

"Mercury Aqua Rhapsody!" Sailor Mercury shouted, and she wasn't the only water elemental to challenge the great firesnake.

"Koori no Yaiba!" Umi, the Magic Knight of water summoned a wave of ice crystals to impale the beast.

Fire clashed with powerful water magics in a great explosion of steam, giving Mary another chance to turn and run- er, fly. She crouched, torn dress flapping in the breeze and wand out in a guard position... and then her upward flight faltered almost as soon as it began. High above Mary, a purple star flickered in the late morning sky. Mary could just make out the form of a girl floating behind the light... a girl in a white robe with blue trim. It was the very magical girl that Mary banished Hikaru into only a minute or two before.

Mary silently cursed fate or whoever placed so many obstacles in her path today as she listened to the spell being cast above her, and even though the words were faint, Mary still heard them.

"Divine... "

The purple star flared and a high pitched whine filled the air. _Oh, shit!_

"...Buster!"

Mary frantically pulled her wand from right to left, pulling a curtain of concrete and earth over her in a thick dome.

_**-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM-**_

Magically generated particle beam cannons were not known for being quiet nor were they known for being weak. When the debris cloud finally settled, Mary's earthen dome was gone. Rubble littered the ground. The girl herself was lying motionless face down in a shallow blast crater.

Naked.

Well, not quite naked. Her outfit had been blasted down to little more than a shredded halter top and half of a skirt. She was wandless, shoeless and in desperate need of a seamstress. Even her lightning bolt charm necklace was torn and smoking on the ground... if her attackers tried just one more time, well then it would be disembodied spirit time again.

Oh, she just had a horrible thought... would she be a phantom of Mary or would _he_ be a phantom of Lord Voldemort again? She whimpered softly.

"_Still alive after all of that?"_ A woman's voice called from the edge of the crater. _"And what's this?"_

Mary was just conscious enough to crack open her eyes and look to the left. What she saw took what little hope she still had away completely. A white gloved hand reach down to pick up a shiny golden chalice.

"_That is the last horcrux. We have a one-hundred percent match between its energy pattern and all of the other ones." _A second, younger female voice called out from slightly further away. _"The girl still registers as Tom Riddle... and I'm also reading Jusenkyo magic. I think 'she' is a victim of the springs."_

Hufflepuff's cup was lost to the enemy. They had her cup and they _knew_ it was her last soul anchor. Beaten and broken on the ground as she was, Mary almost wished for the peace of death to overtake her right then. She couldn't bear to face Harry like this.

"_Well, no wonder I didn't see her coming..." _Mary was in so much pain that she failed to make any deductions from that statement. _"If you are Tom then let me be the first to inform you that you failed. Harry and Usagi finished their first ceremony ten minutes ago. They are currently having a small private reception which I must now interrupt to announce the arrival of our guest of honor. You."_

Tears formed in Mary's eyes. She was too late. Harry was already married to the Moon Whore, her last key to immortality was in enemy hands and any minute now she could be targeted by hot water. She was too weak to fight back and in too much pain to rage against her weakness.

She never dreamed it would end like this.

* * *

pop

"Master Lord Harry Potter Sir! Master Lord Harry Potter Sir!" Dobby fell to his knees, bowing and scraping before the awesome-est wizard lord ever. "I is so terribly sorry for leaving! I is being back again!"

"Get up, Dobby!" Harry gently admonished. "No need for that. Why don't you tell me who summoned you away so we can decide if they should be punished for making you leave us?"

Dobby looked up at Harry with a renewed sense of awe. Dobby and Kreacher were expecting to serve Harry and his guests at the wedding, only they found themselves sitting among the guests instead. Harry had explained his reasoning thusly:

_'This is a celebration of unity. My guests come from across the globe. They come from royal houses and working class homes. There are muggles, witches, wizards, magical girls, phoenix-men, goblins and even aliens from other worlds. And yes, there are elves. Not as servants but as guests. Equals. All are here in one room to celebrate how two can become one and how many can become family.'_

And with that explanation, Dobby's devotion to Lord Harry Potter Sir grew yet again. There _were_ all sorts of men and women in the room. Some of them had feathery wings. Gringotts did send a small delegation once the shock of being invited to a wizarding wedding wore off. Dobby himself was seated between a magical school's headmistress and the heir apparent to a galaxy wide space empire.

But never mind that, he had a message to deliver. "Dobby was called by Missy Plu-" Dobby ground to a halt when he saw the very people who summoned him sitting on the bride's side of the room. "-the _other_ Missy Pluto and the _other_ Missy Mercury. Those not sitting in this room now."

Harry turned to look at Setsuna, only to see her sharing glances with Ami. He saw the two Senshi nod in acceptance of the inevitable. Surely they would be reliving some or all of today with the help of the Time Gates.

"And what did _other_ Missy Pluto and _other _Missy Mercury have to say?" Harry asked.

Dobby smiled brightly. He knew the great Lord Harry Potter Sir would like hearing this. "Other Missy Pluto and Other Missy Mercury telling Dobby to tell Lord Harry Potter Sir that Tom Riddle is being captured outside of the Dome of Tokyo. The Dark Lord is being caught alive and wandless and is ready for the great Lord Harry Potter Sir to defeat him like prophecy is saying!"

"What?"

* * *

-pop-

Harry and Usagi Potter appeared in the middle of a large group of martial artists and magical girls who were in turn surrounded by non-magical authorities and soldiers.

"_Harry!" _ Usagi shouted feeling scandalized. _"We should have said more than 'There's a bit of trouble to sort out. We'll be back in a few minutes, promise.'"_

That shout got a lot of attention. The bride and groom had arrived. Early.

"_Hey, Harry!"_ Ranma shouted from her position next to a tightly bound, scantily clad girl that Harry's never seen before. _"Come say hi to 'Tom'!"_

Harry ignored the reporters and news cameras that focused on him and his bride. He ignored the dull roar of the crowd that was cheering their arrival. With Usagi's hand in his, he walked past several excited and blushing magical girls to reach his fellow Jusenkyo victim.

"_That isn't Tom."_ Harry murmured.

She sure didn't look like Tom Riddle. She was a 'she' to begin with. She looked like a broken shell of a girl too like the will to fight was lost. Still, Harry knew that looks could be deceiving.

Harry came closer to the prisoner and knelt down to her level. Usagi moved to do the same, but Pluto blocked her at the last minute. Sensing the small amount of danger that still remained, a ring of wands, scepters, swords and staffs all leveled on one bound girl. Harry was about to lift the girl's chin when he noticed a small shiny bit of gold lying on the ground before her. It was a small piece of jewelry... a golden lightning bolt charm.

"You sure this is a Dark Lord?" Harry asked Pluto though he never turned away from the girl before him.

At his question, the girl seemed to jerk and slowly raise her head. Finally, their eyes met.

"H-Harry?"

Her voice was meek. Desperate. Soft silver-grey eyes and heavy lashes screamed innocent. Harry was sure that there was no way in Hell that this was his most hated enemy.

"That's me. But I'm afraid I don't recognize you miss." Harry replied. "My friends tell me that you are a rather bad person. I don't see it. You mind telling me who you are?"

Pluto spoke up. _"He fell in the Drowned Girl Spring at Jusenkyo Harry. Just like Ranma did. All our scans prove she is without doubt Tom Riddle."_

Pluto bent over and placed a battered golden cup on the ground between Harry and Mary. _"This is the last horcrux, Harry. She had it with her. Get rid of this one and Dark Lord Voldemort will not escape death again."_

Harry looked between the cup and the girl. Now that he thought about it, he could feel the dark aura rippling off the cup. Strange how he felt nothing from her. Perhaps if his scar was still a functioning link... but it wasn't.

"Miss?" Harry prodded.

The two stared into each other's eyes, and Harry watched Mary's facial expression change from hopelessness to wonder and finally to... to... damn.

"You came for me! I mean- of course you- well... I came to rescue you of course but you saved me instead!" Suddenly Mary's joy at being united with her Harry became much more serious. "Now untie me so that we can get rid of that Moon Bitch and get out of here!"

Harry quickly lost whatever good humor he still had. "And just why would I want to do that? I still don't know your name and now you've insulted _my wife_."

"Mary Riddle."

Harry's eyes widened both at her feminine first name and her infamous family name. Was Pluto wrong? Did Tom impregnate some hapless victim shortly before Harry and Tom had their first confrontation at Godric's Hollow all those years ago?

"_Where's her wand?" _ Harry asked the crowd.

"_Broke."_ Ranma replied with no small amount of satisfaction. _ "But here are the bits left over."_

Harry held his left hand out far enough for Ranma to drop a few odds and ends into it. Wooden shards. Check. They were yew, just what one would expect from Voldemort's wand. Even the broken shape of the yew was the right broken shape. There was also a crushed feather in the pile. The colors were unmistakable to anyone who had ever spent time in Headmaster Dumbledore's office. Fawkes. Damn, this really was Voldemort's wand.

"There is one way to be certain..." Harry began to raise his wand at Mary. "A simple application of hot water should-"

"Nooooo!" Her shrill cry stopped him cold. Mary fell to panic. "Don't do that! Please don't do that! He'll come back. He'll come back and he'll make sure I never see you again!"

Harry narrowed his eyes and leaned in closer to the now panicking witch. "Who will come back?"

Mary squeezed her eyes shut and appeared to struggle with the answer. "L-Lord... Voldemort. Voldemort will come back if you hit me with hot water."

"And you're _not_ him?" Harry asked curiously.

"Not... not really. He hates you. I hate... he doesn't love you like I do." That wasn't how Mary wanted to drop that bomb on him. She began to cry in fear for her future.

Harry got up and slowly returned to Usagi's side.

"_There is something seriously wrong with her."_ Harry muttered.

"_Then heal her."_ Usagi's answer was as firm as it was simple. _"She's in pain Harry. We can help her."_

Harry looked for any doubt in Usagi's eyes. There wasn't any. Very well. He would heal her of the infection known as Dark Lord Voldemort. Harry held one empty hand out to his wife. Usagi summoned the Kaleidomoon Scope and passed it over to him. He took the crystal rod into his hands. Honestly, it felt like an old friend had returned. By Merlin, he actually missed moving about with the Scepter of Prissiness stuck through his belt.

He turned to Mary.

"If the love you feel is real... then this won't hurt a bit." Harry swallowed. "If this is all a trick... if you are hiding darker emotions under a mask so that you can get close enough to strike out... well then this really will be the end of you."

"B-but the prophecy, Harry!" Mary cried. "One of us must die by the hand of the other... the prophecy demands it!"

Harry backed up a bit, and everyone else around him backed up more. Everyone except for Usagi, that is. Harry raised the Scepter of Prissiness in his hands and much of the telly watching world held its breath. He drew the crystal power focus back into position. Mary sat there, motionless with a golden cup resting at her knees. He'd get her and the cup in the same shot. Eyes narrowed in concentration, he never noticed the golden moon sigil on his forehead flare.

"MOON... GORGEOUS..."

As Harry lunged, a desperate shriek left Mary's throat. Fear of death flooded her mind.

"MEDITATION!"

Just like in Diagon Alley... a spectacular flash burned through the retinas of anyone watching. It was done. Harry pulled back slowly from his lunge and relaxed. The crystal scepter slowly fell until its jewel capped end was pointing at the ground.

Mary looked no different. She sat upright bound tightly just as before. Even the golden cup at her knees seemed unperturbed. She was alive. Just as before.

She coughed, eyes opening wide... and then she stopped breathing.

"She's..." Harry stared at her, confused.

"_She's choking!" _ Mercury shouted from somewhere to the right. _"Her airway is obstructed!"_

_What the hell?_ Hadn't he just blasted her with pure white magic? Why was she dying _now?_

Harry's 'saving people thing' kicked into high gear. He swished and flicked the Scepter of Prissiness, silently banishing the ropes from Mary's midsection. As soon as she could move, her hands shot up to her throat in an instinctive effort to grab the offending blockage from the outside. Her skin began to turn blue. She was in desperate need of air.

Harry quickly ran around behind Mary and reached around her waist. He dropped the scepter, clasped his hands together above Mary's bellybutton and then pulled up and in as hard as he dared. Again.

On the third try, Mary erupted in a small fountain of blood and odd bits of torn flesh, all pouring out of her mouth.

_**-Hack- -Cough-**_

When she drew in a deep gasping breath of air, Harry released her and looked over her shoulder.

"_What the Hell's wrong with her, Mercury!" _

Harry moved back to retrieve the crystal focus lying on the ground where he dropped it. Would he need to cast more white magic? Was the job only half done?

"_That's not her blood." _Mercury answered Harry's question after a few full body scans of their captive. _"She expelled blood, muscle and bone fragments but none of it was hers. In fact, some of __the blood__ is yours, Harry."_

Harry looked at the puddle of bloody filth at Mary's feet. Bone fragments. Bone of the father. Bits of muscle. Flesh of the servant. His blood. Blood of the enemy. It made a horrible kind of sense that white magic would physically eject dark ritual materials from this girl's body...

… but then that meant she really was Voldemort. Wasn't she?

Heedless of the potential danger from a supposed enemy, Usagi moved forward to help Harry and the recovering Miss Riddle. She used the pure white sleeve of her own wedding kimono to wipe some blood off of Mary's chin.

"_My Harry,"_ Usagi called. _"Please do something to cover her up." _

Harry pulled out his wand and began transfiguring a simple outfit out of bits of rubble. As he began spelling the clothes into place, Usagi caught Mary's gaze with her own.

"Now... Marry... can you tell us what this was all about?" Usagi asked in a voice that was soft and supportive.

Staring into Usagi's eyes, Mary finally fell to the storm of emotions brought about from catching a Lunar magic particle beam in the chest. She fell forward and latched onto Usagi like her life depended on it.

"I... I'm sorry! I'm sooo sorry! I killed so many people... oh, oh no... I-I w-was..." She then broke down into a massive crying fit.

Usagi would end up holding Mary until the girl cried herself to sleep. Others may have offered to take the prisoner from her before that, but Usagi would have none of it. Sailor Moon wasn't holding a prisoner, she was holding a victim.

Order was restored and people eventually did go on about their business for the most part. Harry and Usagi returned to their private reception. It was left to other Pluto and other Mercury to get Mary someplace she could sleep it off in peace... someplace she couldn't escape from. Surely Cuteness wouldn't mind if an ex-Dark Lord napped in her bed for a few hours, right?

She'd be under heavy guard the whole time. Just in case.

* * *

- - - - - - - - - - - - - Intermission - - - - - - - - - - - - -

No, it's not another separate chapter. I said I'd finish this story in one chapter and I will dammit. Epilogues to follow. Now you go take a potty break, eat some damn candy and get back to reading.

* * *

**Part Two: I Need You**

The singers left the stage. The crowd roared. The lighting changed.

It was time.

-pop- -pop-

With over a hundred and fifty thousand people watching in person and countless more watching via television screens. Minerva McGonagall and Filius Flitwick apparated onto the stage.

Two wands were raised and then the magic began. Flick and swish, twist and jab. The stage turned, buckled and morphed until it was completely transmogrified. What was originally a metal platform with lights and speakers became a stone altar made of tiered concentric rings. There was also a new central aisle running away from the altar. At the far end of the aisle was a smaller raised platform with an arched trellis sitting at the top. The changes were hardly lost on anyone. Clearly a magical girl wedding was next.

The crowds roared.

But Filius and Minerva still had one more task to complete. They walked to a particular spot on stage, a spot near the edge, and canceled a ward.

Suddenly, a dozen rows of seats appeared in a ring around the stage. The seats had always been there but normal guests couldn't see them. Most of these seats were occupied by 'out of town' guests. Magicals mostly though some held other kinds of V.I.P. guests. This was where family and those who attended the earlier private ceremony found themselves. Still, several rows of seats remained empty at the very front. Yes... even in front of the Emperor of Japan and the Queen Mum herself.

Why?

Because this was a magical girl wedding, and magical girls should get all the best seats.

Filius and Minerva stepped down from the stage to take seats in a row that held the Greengrasses and Delacours among others.

-pop-

Mamoru Chiba and Ron Weasley appeared inside of the trellis wearing tuxedos. Not that this was anything new for Mamoru 'Tuxedo Mask' Chiba, but Ron did look a bit off. The ginger wizard immediately pulled out his Nimbus Two-thousand, expanded it and shot into the air. Much better. Chiba took off in a long jump that spanned most of the distance from trellis to altar, and after landing he took a short easy stroll the rest of the way. When both the male avatar and the young wizard were satisfied, Ron pulled out his wand and used it to set off a firework.

Oooooohhhhh. Aaaaaahhhhhhhh.

The firework in question was a magical portrait of Harry and Usagi charmed to wink and snog before exploding. Weasley Wizarding Wheezes does good work.

The crowd roared their approval.

-pop-

Ranma and Shampoo appeared under the trellis. They both crossed the distance between platforms in a single leap and took positions on opposite sides of the altar.

-pop-

Neville Longbottom appeared under the trellis with Yosho Masaki Jurai, the Shinto priest who would be officiating the ceremony. Neville and Yosho took their time walking to the altar, and as they did more members of the groom's party began to pop in under the trellis. There was Gred and Forge, then the Creevey brothers. Ginny appeared with Hermione, and then Luna appeared with Lavender. Myrtle appeared with the Patil twins. Yes, the girls were allowed to be groomsmen... or rather groomswitches. Awesome Lord Harry Potter's Inner Circle of Coolness was a single unit and Harry would not segregate his friends based on naughty bits. They were his Senshi (sort of) and he would not hold one above the rest. Well... 'Mione sure... and maybe Luna too... but those are special circumstances and... well...

The wedding. Right.

Just as the last groomswitch took her place, one more -pop- came out of the trellis. Harry. The groom-who-lived shot out of the trellis on his firebolt with the Sword of Gryffindor at his hip and a tail of wizarding fireworks trailing behind him. Of course, given the chance, Harry would have done things a bit less flashy... like not getting married in front of hundreds of thousands of people... but this was Usagi's day and Harry wanted everything to be perfect for her. The best way to deliver a message in the modern non-magical world was to put on a show, a big one, and Usagi wanted to spread a message of love and joy to the whole world.

Everything would be worth it in the end. Actually, for a boy who grew up in a cupboard under some stairs, getting married was great fun. This morning's special birthday wake-up sex was brilliant and it was also fun to open a few presents at the breakfast table before the whole wedding circus got rolling. And his honeymoon started tonight.

As soon as he touched down, a new stage in the ceremony began. Lighting changed. Music started. It was the song widely accepted as Sailor Moon's theme song by non-magical Japan and the country's magical girl toy industry. Moonlight Densetsu.

As the music ramped up, new arrivals began to emerge from the trellis rapid fire. The crowds began to roar loud enough for noise suppression charms to activate as a steady string of mahou shoujo jogged down the aisle and took their seats. More than three hundred of them attended and it was rumored that every single magical girl in all of Japan had come. Even the Devil Hunters. Even the ones that no one's ever seen in public like Hikaru and her Magic Knight friends.

When the last magical girl took her seat, the first bridesmaid appeared.

Naru stepped out of the trellis. The childhood friend of Usagi blushed heavily under the scrutiny of so many, but she shrugged it off as best she could. Usagi needed her here so she was here. She would be one of only two non-magicals to stand at the altar on this special occasion.

Mercury appeared behind Naru, sigil shining brightly and wearing the dress she wore at the Ministry Yule Ball. Under the makeup and the Senshi disguise magic she was blushing like a Weasley, but she continued on. For Crown Princess and Country, she could do this.

Mars was next. Then Jupiter. Then Venus. Each wore her Silver Millennium ballroom dress as Mercury did and each walked regally down the aisle. Neptune and Uranus came next, then Saturn and finally Pluto. Pluto carried the Garnet Rod as a symbol of her station. As the only one carrying an enchanted weapon down the aisle, she anchored of that part of the procession.

_**WHOOOMP**_

Everyone's attention was drawn to the trellis once again as a giant explosion of glittering rainbow sparkles and glowing faeries filled the air. High pitched squealing and giggling echoed through the giant assembly as two blurs shot out of the sugary-sweet explosion. The flower girls had arrived. On brooms. As Cuteness zigged and zagged her broom, Lulu held on tight while holding a sparkly pink baton in one hand. The baton was enchanted to spit out flower petals on demand. Lulu already asked if she could take it back home with her. On the other broom, Gabby flew around just as randomly as Cuteness while her bombardier Sammy held a flower baton as high as she could; a steady stream of flower petals fell behind her to match Lulu's work.

Harry watched his daughter and her friends play with the crowds for a few minutes, but they did have a time table and playtime couldn't last forever. A few small nods between Mamoru, Ron and Harry lead to the groom pulling out his holly and phoenix feather wand to cast a couple of messenger patroni at the two Little Miss Broomriders. When both brooms stopped abruptly and shot strait to the trellis the crowd had a good laugh. _Get back to work, girls!_

Once the flowerbrooms both returned to their original positions, Cuteness flew directly down the aisle. With a double strength flower petal attack, little of the original floor still showed through. That was a job well done. After the flower girls finished landing and stealing quick Harry Hugs, the music changed again.

It was organ music. _That organ music. _ Wagner's Bridal Chorus.

Two more figures appeared under the trellis. The last two. The bride and her father. Noise suppression wards had to be dialed up again at the sight of a veil and train.

At the other end of the aisle Harry nearly fainted. When his senses suddenly sharpened up without warning, he was sure that someone must have popped him with an Enervate. Thanks to whoever cast that one.

Harry looked at the vision of perfection slowly approaching in a snow white dress. She was more than perfect. She was a goddess. Radiant. It certainly didn't hurt that that she literally glowed. Her golden crescent moon shined brilliantly through a whisper thin veil. Her ankle length silver hair was drawn tight into a single braid, a shiny rope of pure silver running down the middle of her back. While her dress was not heavily jeweled, it was finely detailed in silver thread and managed to sparkle without the aid of magic. Harry would not be the only person watching that thought her divine.

Kenji Tsukino led his daughter down the aisle and in the time it took for him to do so Harry was pinned in place. He didn't remember taking a single breath during the entire march though it certainly seemed that his heart would explode at any moment. He hardly reacted when Kenji and Usagi finally stopped just short of his position. All around the assembly, and in dozens of news stations across the globe, Harry's face was being cast as the new definition of True Love. Straight up Fairy Tale.

Yosho began speaking. Harry didn't hear a word of it. After a short exchange, Kenji released his Bunny and stepped back. The next thing Harry knew, he was looking Usagi in the eyes and her angel soft hands were clasped lovingly in his own.

Yosho spoke. "Do you, Lord Harry James Potter of the Ancient and Noble House of Potter, promise to..."

Harry tried to follow the words. He did listen... though perhaps he didn't hear them all. Surely, he'd never be able to repeat what Yosho said from memory. At the right time, specifically when Harry noticed that Yosho wasn't talking anymore, Harry answered the question.

"I do."

Yosho retook the reigns. "Do you, Crown Princess Usagi Serenity of the Royal House of the Moon, promise to..."

Once the shrine priest finished asking Usagi her question, she replied. "I do."

Harry shook at her words.

The boy-who-was-getting-married was eternally grateful that they had forgone writing their own vows. He barely had enough control over his own voice to repeat the short list of traditional vows that Hermione and Fleur drilled into his head morning, noon and night all through last week. He thought it was annoying then, but being able to run on autopilot was really saving his bacon now.

Usagi spoke again, and again Harry wondered how he lived through the experience. He wouldn't put it past his mates to be sending him a constant stream of beneficial spells. He would find, in time, that a calming draught had been discreetly switched into his stomach from a distance on at least one occasion. It was right when he saw his bride for the first time that Minerva didn't like the color in his face and did what she felt was necessary. Good on her.

"The bride's ring, please..." Yosho called, and Harry saw Ron pull the requested jewelry out of his pocket.

Thank. God. He wanted to trust Ron to do that bit right, but there was always that tiny hint of mistrust eating away at the groom-who-lived. Harry was going to have to ask 'Mione if she helped Ron. Later, though.

Harry took the ring, a new goblin creation as well as a wedding gift from Gringotts, and placed it on Usagi's finger. He sighed in satisfaction. He could feel her trembling. Good. It wasn't just him.

Harry spoke his part. "With this ring, I thee wed..."

At some point, the rolls were reversed and Usagi claimed Harry's future with a goblin made ring. She repeated her vow with a softly wavering voice.

Yosho began speaking again. Harry lost track. Again.

It was only with a light stinging hex to the arse-cheeks that Harry realized Yosho had stopped talking. For the last time.

Oh. Right.

The kiss.

Harry released Usagi's hands just long enough to lift her veil. Once more he had to fight to breath, her dazzling smile was almost too much for him to bear. On top of that smile a single tear fell from her right eye and her left eye was suspiciously bright. Had she been holding those in the whole time? Only to let them go now that he could watch?

The seconds it took for their lips to join seemed to take forever and then... and then... Harry was lost to the world again. Oh well, at least Usagi seemed to be lost with him this time. The kiss deepened. His arms found their way around her waist just as hers found their way around his neck. The world was screaming in celebration and these two love birds didn't know or care. Every single magical girl... as well as most of the rest of the audience... had risen from their seats to cheer the newlyweds on.

"I love you," Usagi whispered through the kissing and the tears, "I love you I love you I love you... so much."

Harry replied in kind, and as the wedding altar's area affect Sonorus was still in effect, every single person there heard their whispered declarations... and they also heard Usagi weeping for joy onto her husband's chest.

A Fairy Tale wedding indeed. The old 'Marry Harry Potter' game Ginny and Luna used to play would soon be overshadowed by a newer, more tender version pulled straight out of real life. Never mind the fact that the internet was about to come alive with video and sound clips from the Wedding of the Millennium.

Mendelssohn's Wedding March began to play in the background, and yet no one moved to leave. It wasn't a mistake... everyone was to remain at the altar save minor adjustments. The general merrymaking continued for as long as the wedding march lasted... just long enough for Harry and Usagi to finish their kiss.

There was one more bit of business to declare before the partying could truly begin. It was fairly important too.

Pluto drew her staff up into the air and then-

_**-Crack-**_

-she brought the butt end down on the stone at her feet. Hard.

_**-Crack-**_

And again. People were beginning to take notice as the sharp report easily rang through the whole building.

_**-Crack-**_

One last time the Garnet Rod struck the floor and nearly all other noises had fallen off, even the myriad news reporters commenting over microphones were cutting their speeches short. They all wanted to know what was about to happen.

"_In accordance with the last wishes of Her Royal Highness Serenity the First, Queen of the Moon, Empress of the Silver Millennium, I hereby announce the reign of Her Royal Highness Serenity the Second, Queen of the Moon! Long live the Queen!"_

Immediately after announcing that huge bomb, Pluto dropped to her knees, set the Garnet Rod on the ground before her and bowed low to her queen. Almost instantly, every other Senshi fell to their knees to acknowledge their queen in the same way. Naru didn't hesitate to follow their example.

They wouldn't be the last to kneel before Queen Usagi either. Harry dropped to one knee while still holding his bride's hands. Behind him, the D.A. 'groomsmen' all fell to one knee or curtseyed. Whether it was Pluto's plan all along or not, a physical reaction to Usagi's royal ascension shot through row upon row of guests.

Sailor Moon had just been declared a Magical Girl Queen, in front of more than three hundred magical girls no less. Every single one of them bowed out of respect. More than half of those girls had fallen to their knees just as the Senshi had and were bowing to _their_ queen. These eager new subjects of the Lunar crown were what one would call magical girl 'free agents'... until now. They were the girls who were not already associated with some magical kingdom or other, and after getting a good look at Queen Sailor Moon they wanted in. Every single one of them.

Many witches and wizards also chose to drop to one knee before Queen Usagi, as by their way of reckoning a Goddess of the Old Ways had returned. The Queen of the Moon was alive. Circe be praised.

"My friends… my family… please rise." Usagi's words filled the air.

Her friends, loved ones and newly acquired subjects began to rise. Usagi turned to Harry, and with a wicked little smirk, she added. "Except you."

Harry smiled widely and remained in position, on one knee, at her feet. Honestly, it was a position he felt entirely comfortable in. Still, she had something else in mind…

"Your sword…" Usagi drawled, her right hand outstretched and palm facing up.

Harry gently drew the Sword of Gryffindor from its sheath and handed it, pommel first, to his Love. She took it and began to study the letters and runes etched into its gleaming blade.

"_I need you." _

Usagi tilted the sword down and tapped Harry's left shoulder with it's blade.

"_I need you by my side."_

Usagi brought it up and over to Harry's right shoulder, tapping it.

"_I need you to be my equal in all things."_

Sharp steel fell once more on Harry's left shoulder.

"_I need a King."_

Usagi turned the Sword of Gryffindor around, offering to return it to Harry. The two locked eyes again.

"_Rise, my King."_

Harry James Potter, Boy-Who-Lived, Chosen-One and Aquatransexual Wizard Lord gained yet another fantastically improbable title. King of the Moon. He would _never_ be able to live this one down in the dorms. Harry rose to his feet. He took back the Sword of Gryffindor, and when his hands were free he pulled his queen close and claimed her lips as was his kingly prerogative.

There was much rejoicing.

The next few hours would become a blur as the party got into full swing. Flitwick released a second set of privacy and space warping charms which revealed a massive house elf run catering line and a huge dance floor which had been lying in wait for just this moment. Magic sure was awesome. After factoring in the space expansion charms, Tokyo Dome was more than double its normal volume and the wizards that set the place up weren't even trying very hard.

Harry and Usagi started things by dancing the first dance and soon they were lost in their own little world alone on the dance floor. They also danced the requisite dances with other people. Usagi danced with her father, Harry with Usagi's mother. Usagi's brother finally got lucky enough to dance with his dream girl Ami.

Harry and Usagi made a point of spending time with the magical girls who had something to do with the fight outside. Wedding Peach was feeling much better now, thanks for asking. Harry got Nanoha to blush by complimenting her dark witch stomping particle beam attack.

Eventually all of the showy bits were done with and the reception became a chance for all people great and small to speak with Harry and Usagi face to face. Not that all one hundred and fifty thousand plus guests would be able to do so, but even some of the walk-ins got to pay their respects... and Pluto may have fudged the flow of time just a bit to let a few more people get to say hi. Of course, it didn't take long for Cuteness to latch on to her parents and refuse let go. As the well wishers came and went, many of them wondered about this odd little Senshi flower girl, but as the newly crowned King and Queen indulged her at every turn, none bothered to question the pinkette's presence. Well, Nabiki considered it... not out loud mind you, just in her head... but then she knew this family better than most outsiders... and she was patient. Maybe if she was a good girl then Pluto would give her another exclusive.

There was one other guest that stood out from the rest. A bit of magic had to be used to separate this meeting from the main celebration but it was important.

"I... I'm sorry. Really, I am."

Mary Riddle was on her knees before Harry and Usagi, hands bound in cold iron manacles on her lap. Her eyes were downturned in submission. It wasn't just Harry and Usagi that Mary was pleading her case to, either. Lord Voldemort had done far more in his past than torment Harry Potter, after all. Emperor Akihito stood to one side as did the Queen Mum, Elizabeth the Second. Opposite the royals, Lord Greengrass and Monsieur Delacour stood as representatives of the Wizarding World.

This was an extradition hearing at the very least and a capital offense trial was not out of the cards.

A few hours' peace and solitude did give Mary time to put her mind back together but it certainly did nothing for her appearance. She was still dirty, barefoot and dressed in the rough outfit that Harry transfigured for her from rubble off the ground. Not that any of that mattered. Girl or not, dirty or not, she was a defeated Dark Lord. Pluto and two Amazons stood behind _the prisoner_ ready to stop any unpleasantness before it could start.

Were she one of the good guys, she'd be pushing for anyone caught in her position to be sent through the Veil. Would the Ministry find a Dementor willing to go back to work just to execute her? The possibility made her stomach turn. Her only hope was to throw herself at the mercy of Harry and his bride.

When she called for the guards not ten minutes ago, she didn't expect them to heed her call. Yet by some miracle the green haired Senshi walked up and agreed to present her to Their Royal Highnesses the King and Queen of the Moon.

_Oh, fucking shit. _The girl she tried to kill was a queen now. The boy she was going to kidnap was king. All she could do was throw herself at the mercy of those she wronged and hope to still be in possession of her soul at the end of the day. That is why she fell to her knees and apologized as soon as she was face to face with Harry again.

"We believe you." Harry answered, and he knew without doubt that he spoke for Usagi as well.

"I know that I will never be able to make up for the death and suffering that I have caused in the past. All that I can say for myself is that I would rather die than become _him_ again... and that I humbly beg that I be spared the Dementor's Kiss."

Harry and Usagi conferred in soft whispers for a moment before Harry stood and set out to shape Mary Riddle's fate.

"I think we can all agree that the trail of murders, tortures and dark treachery the world suffered at the hands of Tom Marvolo Riddle, also known as Lord Voldemort, was a dark blot on the face of history..."

Mary paled. Harry was not going to be merciful after all. She despaired that her very soul was forfeit.

"However, Mary Riddle is not Voldemort."

Mary inhaled sharply and looked up. Just what the hell was going on?

Harry continued. "Aside from Miss Riddle herself, I know Tom Riddle better than anyone alive and I tell you all that this girl is a complete stranger to me. Where is the seething hatred? Where is the arrogant sneer? The harsh demands that I suffer as he torments those I love?"

Harry dug his hand into the tuxedo he was wearing and pulled out something that he had been carrying around with him for the last few hours. It was a small lightning bolt charm dangling from a delicate gold chain. Mary's lost Impervious Charm necklace. Harry held the small gold charm out so that Mary would be able to see it. She did see it, then she blushed and looked away.

"Just as I thought." Harry declared smugly before dropping the necklace into Mary's open palm. "Miss Riddle neither looks nor acts the part of Voldemort. True, the evidence presented to us today supports that she _was_ Voldemort… but Voldemort was a Dark Wizard who came to define evil for generations of British magicals. Miss Riddle, however, has been touched by the power of white magic. While it may sound childish and naïve, that is the power of love. What you have to understand is that true dark magic and white magic are polar opposites and my use of Lunar white magic has literally purged the darkness out of Miss Riddle's body... I would even go so far as to say that I cleansed her soul. Everything that made Voldemort what he was is gone."

Harry looked down at Marry.

"I don't know you, miss. You aren't who you used to be and Jusenkyo clearly changed you more than it changed me. That happened before I tagged you with the Scepter of Prissiness." Harry said. "Tell us, Mary... What happened to Voldemort? Who are you?"

She told them. She told them of her dark origins, of Lord Voldemort's desire to seize the exotic powers of Jusenkyo and avatar magic. She told them of her little accident at the springs and of her journey back to England. She spoke of when she finally realized that there were now two Riddles... when she realized that there was more to her cursed form than pouty lips and killer legs. She spoke of her day at King's Cross Station and how she killed the auror. Finally she outlined the morning battle from her side of things.

"... so you see. I'm not a good person. I mean, even when I'm not a Dark Lord, I'm _still_ dark. I've broken enough laws in the last two months, even ignoring the few times that Bastard got out, that the muggle governments would still lock me up and throw away the key. Put before the Wizengamot, I could get life in Azkaban for killing that auror. I'm sorry to say, Harry, _that _is Mary Riddle for you. A young dark witch in love. Very dangerous combination, that."

Harry took in a deep breath and ran a hand through his short, messy hair.

"Bloody bastard that he was, looks like I still owe something of an apology to Albus Dumbledore." Harry looked straight up just in case a crazy old man was watching him from above somehow. "He was sure that love was the power Voldemort knew not and it looks like he was right all along... even if he picked the wrong method to wield such a power."

"Right..." He collected himself and turned to Mary. "I can't speak for anyone else, mind you, but I can tell you that Usagi and I no longer see you as the dark witch you say you are. You came here to murder Usagi in cold blood, did you not?"

Mary nodded.

"And you intended for the two of us to begin an unholy reign of terror and conquest while ruling the world happily ever after, right?"

She nodded again.

"So if I let you walk out of here under your own power, you'd keep at it then? Regroup and try to kill my wife? Take over the world?"

"No!" Mary shouted immediately. "Never again! You beat me, Harry! You win. I'll take any oath you want me to take. I'll rot away in prison if that's what you want."

Harry looked around the small gathering that was observing his examination of the accused.

"Even factoring in that whole 'King of the Moon' thing, I can't speak for everyone here... but I can speak for myself and my Love..." Harry looked back at Usagi and saw her smile encouragingly. _Keep going._ "For all crimes real or imagined committed by one Mary Riddle against the Houses of Potter and of the Moon, I forgive you."

"But I killed an auror, Harry." Mary countered. So shocked was she at his support that she unconsciously took devil's advocate. "I did that and a lot of other bad things in a lot of different countries. You don't have the power to pardon _all_ of my crimes."

"Which is why I humbly submit before those who's people you have wronged that a form of magical community service be performed. You're certainly penitent enough for what I have in mind..." Harry stopped to center himself.

Damien spoke up. "Harry, boy. I know you have as much reason as anyone to hate what Riddle has done in the past-" Mary wilted at the words. She knew them to be true. "but you can't expect everyone to forgive him just because you are willing to turn the other cheek. What assurances do we have that this girl isn't just an exceptionally good actress? Voldemort was known to have a silver tongue."

Harry smiled, as much for Mary's sake as for his own. "I trust her now because of the very magic I used to purge the Dark Lord's spirit from her body. Love based Lunar white magic. It's the same magic that turned all of those Death Eaters light in Diagon Alley. They went to prison willingly and actually fought against the Death Eaters tasked with freeing them. It's the same magic that cured a known werewolf. Mary is willing to take a magical oath and I say we have much to gain. She isn't Voldemort... but she does have all of his power and all of his memories. She can spearhead the Ministry's effort to hunt down and imprison any Death Eaters still at large... even the ones only _their master_ would know about."

Harry stopped and stared at Mary as though working through a difficult puzzle. "Mary?"

"Yes?"

"The Defense position at Hogwarts. Rumor has it that Voldemort cursed the position so that no one professor could teach more than a single year. Is that true?"

She nodded. Guilty as charged. Again.

"So you know how to lift the curse, then?"

"Why... yes. Yes, I could lift it. All I need is a wand and a trip to Great Hall."

Harry smiled. "Excellent. Then the next suggestion would also work."

"And what, may we ask, is your next suggestion?" Queen Elizabeth spoke. These were _her_ subjects after all.

"I humbly suggest, Your Highness, that when Mary is done chasing dark wizards for the Ministry that she devote hertime to teaching the children of Magical Britain how to defend themselves. If memory serves, Headmistress McGonagall has yet to fill the position for next term. Merlin knows I'll be far too busy to teach the class again and I would like to know four sure that the professor helping me get ready to take my N.E.W.T.'s is fully up to the task."

"Surely you don't expect us to let a child teach other children defense. You yourself have gone on record as saying that you only took the post due to the worst kind of emergency in the middle of a war." Monsieur Delacour retorted.

"And you would be correct in that 'Mione and I are not up to doing this a second time. Not so quickly anyway... but what you have to remember is that Mary here isn't just a teen with wicked skill. She may not be a Dark Lord but she is a reformed Dark Lord. She has the experience and the knowledge required to really get the job done." Harry turned back to the girl kneeling on the floor. "Mary. I fought Voldemort at the Yule ball. You remember?"

"Yes. You are good for your age but Dumbledore really should have been training you up better. I only retired from the fight when both power and numbers were against me. In a proper duel- or even a improper one- I could easily smack you and your precious D.A. around without any real effort."

"That's exactly my point. Young girl or not, Mary here is the world's foremost authority in the realm of Dark Arts. I don't doubt that she is also the best wizarding duelist alive. Were Dumbledore still alive, I bet she could still have schooled him on the subject. She'll be a better Defense professor than the Headmaster was and far better than I was." Harry felt like he was delivering a sales pitch near the end of it, but he understood that this was the first important decision of his tenure as King (still having trouble with that bit) and he was absolutely sure that Mary deserved this.

"Just to make this clear to all involved," Damien summarized, "You wish the powers that be to sentence Mary Riddle, who is a former Dark Lord who had all her 'dark' aspects magically purged... you want us to sentence her to community service catching dark wizards and teaching defense. Is that about right?"

Harry checked back with Usagi for a moment before nodding. "That's about right. Yeah."

Minister for Magic Damien Greengrass, who was still technically Harry's magical guardian, made his opinion known. "I would agree to your proposal on two conditions."

"And they are?"

"First," Damien answered, "That we officially tell the world that Lord Voldemort is dead. I don't want anyone chasing after this girl in some misguided attempt to release a Dark Lord from such an unusual prison."

"That works. I can easily testify under truth potion or magical vow to having defeated Voldemort for the last time. We have the evidence necessary by way of broken wand bits and other materials known to have been incorporated into his resurrection ritual. We know that the dark artifacts that held Tom Riddle within this plane of existence have been undone. The spirit of Tom Riddle no longer survives within Marry Riddle in any way. He is dead. The prophecy is fulfilled."

Damien nodded in acceptance. So did his fellow 'judges'.

"Second, I want you King Potter," flinch, "to be her keeper. You shall be responsible for her good conduct for however long is required to see her debt to society repaid."

He should have seen that one coming. Fine. The guys were going to freak though. "I accept."

There was a round of discussion before everything came to a close. Everyone agreed pretty quickly, all told. To be honest, only Harry and his Magical Girl Queen wife had the power and ability to keep tabs on a reformed Dark Lord. It was a fair bet that no non-magical prison could hold the girl should she make any attempt to escape and the magical governments who weren't Moon based still worried about corruption.

Mary's magical parole hearing ended when Harry extended a hand to help her get off the floor.

"Congratulations, Mary." Harry said to the girl. "You've got your life back."

"Thank you, Your Highness. And Happy Birthday." Harry lit up at her words.

With the mess of a royal wedding to get through, a lot of people had forgotten about his birthday. Not Mary, apparently. She struggled for a moment before getting her bearings. She's been on her knees for so long now that her foot was asleep.

"I humbly request a pair of shoes. Perhaps some socks as well?"

"Can you not conjure a pair?" Harry asked, teasing.

Mary held out her empty hands. "Not without a wand, _my King._"

Did King Harry detect a bit of snark?

"Fair enough." Harry pulled out his spare and handed it over.

Mary's hand closed around the wand, yet she continued to blink owlishly at Harry without wielding it. "You gave me a wand."

"That's right." Harry answered.

She looked at it. "This is Dumbledore's wand."

"He doesn't need it anymore." Harry said. "You hold onto that one until we can get you a new one."

Mary's eyes shot open. "Ollivander! He's at Malfoy Manor... well, I renamed it Riddle Manor but you get the idea... but he's been there for ages!"

"No worries," Harry soothed, "We cleared out the manor and got Ollivander about three weeks ago."

"But I could still attack you with this." Mary nodded her head fractionally in Usagi's direction. "I could disable you, kill her and be off in a flash."

"But you won't." He answered; by then Usagi had risen from her chair to stand by his side.

Mary didn't disable or kill anyone.

In fact, her first act with wand in hand was to swear a magical oath of service, loyalty and fealty to the King of the Moon. Penitent, yes, but she was still a girl in love. A Lunar white magic blast in the baps couldn't change that... if anything it only purified her feelings.

Now that she had her life in order, she needed shoes. With a casual air that made McGonagall look like a rank amateur, Mary magicked herself some highly polished leather shoes. And a new royal blue satin dress. And some silver jewelry... and a clean and perfumed body and a new hairstyle and a lacy and stylish cloak. Finally, she held her lightning bolt charm necklace in front of her, gave it a magical repair job and set it back around her neck where it belonged.

"Well don't you clean up nice." Harry joked, not that it was much of a joke. She was quite adorable.

"Thank you, my King." Mary answered demurely. "I live to please. Well, from now on I do."

"Do we need to look into your… er, _allergy_… to hot water?" Harry asked.

"That is what the necklace is for, my King." Mary answered. She ran her fingers lovingly over the golden lightning bolt charm sitting upon her breast. "So long as I bear your mark, I will be safe."

"But if it should be removed?" Usagi asked. Her heart went out to Mary as it had for all of those that Sailor Moon fought with in the past. Many good people were introduced first to her as enemies.

Mary's eyes dulled a bit. "I... I'm not sure what would happen if I were to fall to the curse again, my King. I exist... surely I must still have a soul or at least some part of one... but reversing the curse would push me back to a form that does not exist anymore."

"I don't believe that you would be in danger of reverting to the Dark Lord," Harry added, "but I also know that the attack I got you with does not cure Jusenkyo curses. Didn't help Ranma at all. I suspect if we asked Mercury... and I will... if we asked her to scan you that she will still find Jusenkyo magic in your system."

"If there is anything I can do for you, I will do it." Usagi drew Mary to her and hugged her close. "My plans for the future include you. I will not allow your curse to burden you forever. You are one of us now, and we take care of our own."

"My Queen." Mary said with real warmth.

Voldemort thought that love was a weakness. Mary knew now that he was wrong. So very wrong.

"Hey!" A little pink ball ran into view. Cuteness. "Whoever you are, your time is up! I want my Harry now!"

Mary noted the pinkette's familiar facial features, the glowing crescent moon riding high on the girl's head and made a very reasonable connection. She must be related to Usagi. Closely related.

"As you wish it, my Princess." Mary bowed theatrically to Cuteness before doing the same to her jailors. "By your leave, I shall get better acquainted with my future students and Headmistress..."

"Who told you!" Cuteness squeaked as her parents nodded their acceptance to Mary.

Mary smiled warmly as she disappeared into the crowd, "Why, _you_ did. Just now."

Cuteness shook herself and huffed. _"I am soooo glad you finally turned Aunt Mary, Daddy. Keeping quiet on that one was super hard."_

"_You knew!" _ Usagi squeaked before settling down. _"Of course you knew. It's just that the last six months would have been a lot easier had we known Harry wouldn't have to actually kill Riddle to 'kill' Riddle."_

The little Crown Princess looked up at her mother's face and blew a big raspberry. After that, though, Cuteness lost her smile.

"_Mommy. Daddy. It's time for me to go." _ Cuteness was looking down at her feet and kicking at a bit of dust.

"_But it's still early."_ Harry returned. _"I don't think the sun is even down yet."_

"_Noooooooo..." _The little girl whined. She pulled a magical device out from behind her back. _"It's __**time**__ to __**go**__."_

"_I'm sorry to say that the young princess is correct, Your Highness." _Pluto appeared behind the girl. _"Her tasks have been completed and her lessons learned. She saw her mother lost to Jusenkyo. She comforted her father at a low point in his life. She saw her mother come back from the dead. She attended their wedding. She is done here. She needs to go __**home**__."_

Oh. _Ohhhhhhhhhhh._

Usagi quickly swept her daughter up into a big hug. _ "Oh, baby! I'm gonna miss you soooooo much."_

Then there were mother-daughter face kisses. _ "Hey!"_ Cuteness squawked indignantly. _"Quit it!"_

Harry liberated his daughter only to grab her up and steal the same smooches that Usagi took.

"_Quit it quit it quit it quit it quit it quit it!" _When Crown Princess Cuteness was let down again, her face was as pink as her hair.

"_Hold still for a mo'." _ Harry mumbled and pulled out his wand. Then he hit himself, Usagi and little Usagi all with a charm.

"_What was that, Daddy?"_ The girl asked with a big smile.

"_Cheering charm." _He replied equally smiley. _"No tears. I won't allow it."_

"_Oh, thank God." _Usagi added gaily. _ "I don't want to sob in misery on my wedding day."_

"_Nevertheless, it is time." _ Pluto gave the smallest Senshi a little nudge. _"She's already said her goodbyes to everyone else."_

"_So," _Mommy said,_ "How long before we see you again this time?"_

Cuteness pinked a bit more and began twiddling her fingers._ "Sometimes, when a King and a Queen love each other very, very much... they _hhmmmpppphhh!"

Harry didn't care to hear the rest of that explanation. On the other hand, he was beginning to recover enough from that whole 'King of the Moon' thing that he could again devote some time to thinking pervy thoughts about what he and Usagi could do after this party was over and they were alone again. That Lunar Disguise Pen was just full of potential. And then there was transfiguration and charms. So many possibilities.

They stayed together for the next five minutes as one happy family. Any longer and Harry would have had to recast the cheering charm lest Usagi be tempted to ban all time travel in order to keep her little girl here.

After a few very close cuddles and declarations of love, Cuteness felt her smile faltering and skipped up to the top of the wedding altar where everyone could see her.

Funny. Her parents both expected her to discretely disappear into the depths of the Tokyo Dome's superstructure.

Not this time.

"_Come on, Luna-P!" _ Cuteness called to her techno-magical assistant as she whipped out her personal Key of Space-Time and began fiddling with the controls. Luna-P appeared by her side and waited for their ride out.

As no one had bothered to remove the area effect Sonorus on the highest tier of the altar, Cuteness began to draw huge amounts of attention. Showtime. She held the Key of Space-Time high above her and shouted.

_"Time Guardian! Tear apart the sky, and open the space-time door to me! I call the true name of the almighty god of time, the time guardian's father! __Chronos__! Reveal to me the path of light!"_

With the whole assembly of magical girls, witches, wizards, goblins, elves, phoenix-men and non-magical men and women watching in open wonder, a portal to another time and place opened directly in front of the little magical girl.

A door through Space and Time was opened. Right there. Holy fuck.

Queen Mommy and King Daddy began to mount the altar with the idea of confronting their little grandstanding time traveling girl. They were too slow.

"_Byyyyyyeeeeeee Mooooooooommmmm Byyyyyyyyeeeeeee Daaaaaaaaaddddddd Seeeeeeeeee Yoooouuuuuu Innnnnnn Theeeeeeee Fuuuuuuuuu-tuuuuuuuurrrrrrrreee!" _ Crown Princess Usagi Cuteness Serenity-Potter sang at the top of her lungs from the top of the altar before hopping through her Space-Time portal.

The door shut as soon as she was clear. Her escape was flawless.

"_She is so grounded!" _Harry shouted into the air.

"_Harry, love," _Usagi consoled,_ "She hasn't been conceived yet."_

"_Well, I'm grounding her the minute she's born."_ He said with steely determination.

"_You have fun with that, Harry." _ Usagi answered. _"I'll likely be passed out from the pain and effort of childbirth."_

Harry and Usagi were both on the top tier of the altar when they said that. Everyone heard.

Everyone.

* * *

Harry and Usagi would have their honeymoon, and it would be spectacularly brilliant in every way. And then they would proceed to shape the world in ways no one expected. Not even Pluto. Seemingly against all odds, everyone would love them for it. Their vision of a perfect utopia would not be denied.

Dark Lady Cuteness would rule the Sol system by fear and a pink iron fist of doom- wait! No, that doesn't happen. Sorry.

After the wedding, Mary Riddle would team up with Sailor Pluto and the Saotomes to hunt down the last active Death Eaters and their remaining supporters, catching them all in record time. Mary would also be ready to teach come September first. She would soon become one of the most successful and most popular Defense professors in Hogwarts history.

Other people would also do very interesting things, things worth stories of their own... and they would all live Happily Ever After... or at the very least, they would all live in Interesting Times.

Very Interesting Times.

**The End**

**(Except for Epilogues which are to follow)**

**Chapter Notes:**

Let me give a big Thank You to everyone who took the time to read my story. It was a real labor of love, one that I like to think paid off. Hopefully you feel the same way.

My research into Japanese weddings left some leeway in the details as I couldn't get anything to say 'this is the _only_ way how it's done in a precise step by step order'. I did find several light variations including the priest/miko led Shinto ceremony and the san san kudo ceremony. Both seemed to have shared elements from what I saw so I used what I thought would be an acceptable version if not the be-all-end-all traditional version. Either way, drinking sake in the middle of the ceremony seemed like a wonderful idea. What a way to loosen up and feel better about joining your future to that of another person.


	22. Epilogue One and Threequarters

Insert standard legal disclaimer and boilerplate notes here.

**Violence Inherent in the System**

**Epilogue Insanity with Extra Sex **(but not graphic, mind you)

**Omakelogue - Welcome Back Potter** (Shortly after 'End of a Dry Spell')

Late 30th Century A.D., Mare Serenitatis

Harry's full body seizures tapered off. Completely spent, he fell to into silk sheets and curled into the side of his still heavily breathing wife. The two fully immersed themselves in the afterglow of a really good time.

"_Tell me again... why was this necessary?"_ Harry asked the room in general.

One might wonder at the question. What did he have to complain about?

"_Speaking in my full capacity as Royal Physician," _Luna proclaimed boldly, _"it is my duty and honor to declare that both your Snorkacks are in full health and quite happy to be reunited after such a prolonged separation."_

Luna then proceeded to remove her gloves and pack away her 'medicinal' oils and lotions.

With great effort, Harry turned to look at Usagi. _ "I thought Hermione was the Royal Physician. When did that change?"_

"_I thought so too..." _Usagi replied after some time. Her thinking was still impaired from her last orgasms. Plural. _"Though Luna has assisted Hermione on more than one occasion..."_

A pleasant aftershock surged through Usagi's frame, temporarily breaking her concentration again.

"_Where is Hermione, Luna?"_ Usagi asked eventually._ "I'm sure she was supposed to come by."_

Duchess Lovegood turned to her King and Queen. _"I'm quite sure I don't know. Perhaps she should be found guilty of treason and sentenced to a firm spanking?"_

Harry and Usagi looked at each other and sighed. Luna always suggested spankings- especially for her own punishments... and for her rewards as well.

One the far side of the Lunar Imperial Palace, in a genuine medical office, the real Royal Physician (among other titles) Duchess Granger struggled against her bindings. Her futile struggles did nothing to shake the heavy oak chair she was tied to nor did they strain the hundreds of meters of silk chord hand wrapped around her body. She hurled threat after vengeful threat through a red rubber ball gag. Grrrrrrrrrr... She'd get even with that little blonde twat one day. Oh yes, revenge would be hers!

**Omakelogue**** End**

**Epilogue One and Three-quaters**

Also Known As

**The Greatest Prank in the History of The Crystal Millennium**

Late 30th Century A.D., Mare Serenitatis

_Again_

"_I... don't think this's a good idea." _ Princess Mercury slurred.

She stumbled into a chair, her 'friends' giggling in a loose circle around the room. She hated it when the room spun around like that.

"_Lightwieght." _Princess Jupiter joked._ "All you've had is a bit of wine."_

"_Not that!" _ The blue haired young looking (and still hot after all these years) immortal barked. _"Well that too... but just what are we doing here anyway?"_

Mercury ignored Jupiter's earlier pronouncement and pointed a wobbly finger at the softly shimmering door through Space and Time sitting 'innocently' in one corner of the room.

"_That's what I'd like to know." _ Pluto. Damn.

"_Busted!" _ Venus called from her perch on the side of a loveseat facing the space-time door.

Pluto, Queen of Earth and Chief Adviser to the the Queen of the Moon, was using her Angry Mommy face and her Angry Mommy voice again. It happened sometimes... most recently during the celebration week following King Harry's resurrection and the subsequent Epic Shagging. That shagging was so epic, and so widespread, that the royal couple was only one of the thousands of families to expand nine months later. There was a genuine baby-boom on the moon. Just as all the ladies of Queen Serenity the Second's court were beginning to feel like naughty schoolchildren, the space-time door in the corner flared to life.

"_Well, fuck." _ Wiseman, serial super villain and all around prat, said after jogging into the room only to stop dead center.

"_Tell me about it," _ Esmeraude added. _"You're a total buzzkill, Pluto."_

Black Lady, who was the last baddie to slip into the room, just held one hand over her mouth and kept quiet.

The only reason Pluto didn't summon her sparkly pole arm o' death and deliver a righteous ass whipping to three of Sailor Moon's most notorious enemies (one being the corrupted Crown Princess Cuteness herself) was that none of the other Senshi in the room were doing anything about it. It's like they expected three arch-villains to come in and have a drink... maybe play some strip poker or something.

Pluto felt a headache coming on. _ "What in Serenity's name is going on?"_ She yelled.

"_We're saving the world!"_ Venus crowed, swinging her arms wide. _ "What's it look like we're doing?"_

"_It looks like you're all consorting with the enemy!" _

Pluto watched in surprise as Wiseman plopped down into the loveseat Venus was perched on. Venus smiled brightly and slipped into his lap.

Pluto felt a migraine headache coming on. She needed drugs and she needed them soon.

Then the other shoe dropped.

Wiseman reverted back to King 'Just' Harry. Polyjuice? As Pluto stood there, jaw hovering a hairsbreadth off the floor, Esmeraude shed her evil form to become Mary Riddle, ex-Dark Lord and King's Thane of the Lunarian Court. Black Lady didn't change.

Nope. Still Black Lady.

"_Whatever," _The pink haired vixen dismissed Pluto's unease. _"Tsunami-chan got a new ship and she wants me to go boy watching in the Gamma Quadrant with her. Not a whole lot of humanoids out there, but the ones that are there are all totally hot thrill-seekers. Should be like shooting Mon Calamari in a barrel."_

"_I'm not listening! Laaaa-la-la-la-la!"_ Harry covered his ears with his hands... unfortunately leaving himself open to assault. Venus slid a hand into unguarded private territory. _ "Hey! That's inappropriate touching!"_

"_Pervs. The lot of you."_ Not-Really-Black Lady murmured as she fled to her Time-Space door and re-keyed it. _"See you same time tomorrow, Dad."_

"_Where do you think you get it from, Princess Barbarella?" _ Venus shot back. A thousand plus years and that movie was still awesome as hell. Well, Venus thought so.

Without looking back to see her father nod 'yes' about meeting tomorrow, Cuteness held up one arm and gave Venus the post-30th Century version of ye olde two fingered salute. Two long pink streamers passed through the portal through four dimensions and disappeared.

"_Would someone please tell me what's going on before I snap and kill something important?"_ Pluto asked politely.

"_I already said we're saving the world." _Venus replied. _"Oh! Dibs on playing Calaveras tomorrow. Can't wait to fuck myself in the past."_

Harry looked at her, eyes wide in shock. Venus went back over what she said and spotted the error.

"_With. Myself. Fuck __**with **__myself. Not like that, you perv. Well... if it __**was**__ like that then it's just masturbation, right? It's my body and I'll do what I want with it."_

"_I... I don't think time travel will let you do that, Venus." _ Harry managed. Time to try a saving throw against immortal sluts _and_ immortal manipulators. Or would that be manipulatrixes? Manipulatrixi? _"Tell her, Mary. It was your idea."_

Mary sighed, knocked back a conveniently placed drink and took center stage.

"_Your Highness..."_ Mary bowed respectfully to the Queen of Earth. Pluto nodded back. _"Not long after Duchess Lovegood delivered her last plate of brownies... you know, the 'medicinal' ones... I had a thought. What if we could pinpoint all the temporal events in my beloved King's history that are both bloody and vague and... fix... them so they weren't real bloody. Just fake bloody. And still vague."_

Pluto resisted rolling her eyes. _"You all know what a paradox is. What happened, happened. There is no fixing it after the fact no matter how good the idea sounds when you are stoned off your ass."_

"_Which is why you can't stop us either." _ Mary grinned like the lunar cat that ate the canary. _ "We've done this three times already! We __**can't**__ let the real Wiseman or Esmeraude show up... that would be a paradox for sure!"_

Pluto cursed in her head. She really should have killed Harry Potter that very first day they met in the Himalayas. Nobody would have missed him then. _Fuck, fuck, fuck._

"_So the whole Black Moon Clan war?" _ Pluto challenged.

"_Staged!"_ Harry crowed. _"No one dies. No one! Not in the past or in the past's future which is still our past... I think."_

"_But I stocked Ceres full of all our worst criminals!" _Pluto retorted. _"Wiseman and Prince Demand are real, damn you! What happens when they try to do what they're supposed to do!"_

"_I got that covered!"_ A shout came from the door behind Pluto.

Queen Serenity the Second entered the room with a bounce in her step and a crystal scepter in her hands. Crown Princess Cuteness (the temporally accurate one) skipped in behind her mommy and was in turn followed by Ranma and Shampoo. Like most of the Lunar Court and Lunar Imperial City's inhabitants, the Saotomes were rendered immortal due to their constant exposure to Usagi's Silver Crystal and the Lunar power it constantly releases.

Shampoo was also carrying Yuri Ikuko Serenity-Potter, the three month old second daughter of... well the name should give it away. 'Yuri' as in lily, not as in girl-on-girl dirty fiction, you pervs. Named for Harry's mom, just in Japanese.

There was a round of bowing/ curtseying to which Usagi blew everyone a raspberry.

"_So it worked?" _ Harry asked his Love.

She nodded eagerly. _"The source is cleansed and those who were once affected are cured-" _Usagi turned to Ranma who looked away and blushed,_ "except for those who declined the cure."_

"_Wonderful!" _ Harry pushed Venus off his lap and stood. Venus pouted. She was ignored. _ "Mary Riddle! On __your knees!"_

In the King's Thane's mind, his image was rendered in soft focus and warm light with cherry blossoms and little hearts floating through the frame. And there was just the right amount of lens flare.

"_As you wish my King!" _ She dropped and faced him immediately, heart aflutter. _"Finally! Though I didn't expect such a big crowd for our first time together. Kinky!"_

Harry blushed and shook his head. _ "Please turn around and face Usagi, Mary."_

_From behind!_ Mary was so very happy. She'd been waiting a really, really, really long time for this.

She jerked a bit when she felt his hands on her exposed collarbone. Huh... why was he removing her protective necklace? Funny how Usagi and Cuteness were right there... and what were they doing pointing Cuteness's new scepter at her? Fear attempted to gain a toehold in her heart, but her faith in her King and Queen was absolute. She held firm.

"_Just like with Shampoo, Honey..."_ Usagi whispered into her daughter's ear. _"only I'm going to add something extra to it. Don't fight it, okay?"_

"_Yes, Momma."_ The ten year old (physically anyway) girl replied.

They both drew forth their powers, their hearts and their will. Everyone except Harry and Mary shielded their eyes. The room was bathed in pure white light for ten to twenty seconds before the light show stopped.

"_Did it work?"_ Harry asked from his position behind the kneeling Mary.

"_Yup!" _ Mercury replied. She was drunk enough to slip on her grammar, just not drunk enough to forget to do her scans when Usagi went full magical whammy on something.

Usagi spotted a tea tray (thank you Dobby) and poured out a measure of hot water. Then she splashed Mary with it.

Nothing happened. And no, she did not have her necklace on at the time.

Mary was still trying to reboot her brain when Usagi spoke next. _ "In my long labors creating the Scepter of Prissiness, I have mastered my mother's magics... and that work has finally allowed me to reign in the chaos of Jusenkyo. The pools are no longer cursed. You are free of Jusenkyo. Rise, Nemesis."_

"_Free?" _ Mary asked, stunned.

"_Nemesis?" _ Pluto asked, stunned.

Usagi gave 'Nemesis' a compact mirror. "See for yourself."

Mary took the compact and looked at her own face. There. On her forehead. A softly glowing silver sigil which resembled a quetsion mark with a cross on the bottom.

"_Sailor Nemesis," _Usagi called in her formal Queenly tone, _"I grant you dominion over the territory of the once __great planet of Nemesis. Asside from your own magical core, you may now draw power from Ceres and her sister planetoids in the asteroid field between Mars and Jupiter. Henceforth, you shall take your rightful place among my Guardian Senshi, a Princess. Rise Mary Riddle, Princess of Ceres, Senshi of Nemesis."_

Nemesis stood on shaky legs. It was slow going until her King put an arm around her shoulders to give some support. Then applause began. Whistles and cat calls followed. Mary may have started off as one of the bad guys, but that's pretty common in magical girl kingdoms. Even before her age could be measured in three digits, she was as loyal and devoted to the Queen and King as any other Senshi. She has also taught countless Lunar citizens, governed dozens of regions and researched some of the most powerful and least known magics in the whole solar system. Only her 'allergy' to hot water has prevented her from leaving the Queen's side in times of war, though none were more willing fight and die. So cared for was she that Usagi deemed her an Imperial Treasure too valuable to field in battle; her Jusenkyo given Achilles heel was deemed too great a risk.

So, all told, she deserved this.

Usagi spoke again. _"Nemesis. My first order for you as a Guardian Senshi is to overcome whatever resistance the inhabitants of Ceres may provide; past, present and future. They must not be allowed to interfere with the operations we have undertaken through these temporal missions. You may request whatever aid you feel is necessary, but we will subdue the inhabitants of Ceres. Peacefully if possible... I want them alive and reformed. Harry tells me he has already spoken to our daughter's future self and she will guide you through time if Pluto freaks out on us."_

"_It shall be as you wish, my Queen."_ Suddenly, an enormous grin threatened to split Nemesis' face in half. Tears of joy began pouring down her cheeks. _"YES! Oh, God yes!"_

Wow. They didn't expect her to be quite that happy about her promotion and subsequent marching orders.

"_Breathe, Mary." _ Harry hugged a little tighter. _ "I refuse to watch you die of happiness."_

"_Don't you see?"_

She spun in his arms and hugged him back. A little smooch or two was stolen. Wait... did she just bite his neck?

"_Not once!"_ Her soft silvery-grey eyes burned with an inner fire. _ "Not once when a Senshi has asked our Queen for permission to bed you was she refused!"_

Harry knew what that inner fire was now. That was the twin inner fires of love and lust. Bugger. He walked right into this one.

Mary slowly turned her gaze on Usagi. She reached deep inside and pulled out her very best puppy dog eyes and most poutiest lips. She _did not_ let go of Harry.

"_May I have him tonight, my Queen?"_

Harry and Usagi looked at each other. Neither one had expected this- or at least not so quickly- but she was right. The other Senshi would on occasion request a night with Harry and they would be granted their request. Technically, no request for a Senshi to bed their Queen has ever been refused either... though only one has made a habit of it. Yes, it was and still is Mars.

"_Very well, Nemesis-"_

"_YYYEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!" _The fresh baked Senshi jumped on her King, wrapped her legs around his waist and commenced to suck his face off. Hard.

There was much rejoicing.

**Epilogue End**

**Note:**

I have ideas for another sketch-like epilogue or two, but I'm unsure of their true value or production schedule. Due to this, I'm calling this **'Complete'** and _**maybe**_ there _**might**_ be more later. Possibly. Don't bet the farmville family plot on it, though.


End file.
